


Badly Made Bridges

by aforgetfulgirl, hangonsilvergirl



Series: The Order of Weed [10]
Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Activism, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Cross Dresssing, Death Eaters, Explicit Sexual Content, Extramarital Affairs, Fetish, Hanson - Freeform, Illegitimate Children, MWPP Era, Marauders, Multi, Swearing, Teenage Pregnancy, Vandalism, Violence, no magic, smoking pot
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-07-10
Updated: 2014-07-17
Packaged: 2018-02-08 06:17:42
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 39
Words: 267,242
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1929879
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/aforgetfulgirl/pseuds/aforgetfulgirl, https://archiveofourown.org/users/hangonsilvergirl/pseuds/hangonsilvergirl
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A magic-less AU featuring the Marauders as members of an underground activist organization.</p><p>(Peter Pettigrew is selling his friend's secrets. Self-absorbed fashion mogul T.M. Riddle has an all-consuming grudge and questionable morals, and is slowly losing his mind. Not knowing who to trust, the Order of Weed is unraveling. Will they smoke out the mole before things come to a head? Before Badly Made Bridges collapse?)</p><p>If it sounds ridiculous, it's because it is.</p><p> </p><p>A continuation of Stories from East Portlemouth Prep.<br/>*** All chapter titles are songs.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. The Times They Are a Changin' (September 6th, 2006)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Where Fabian's resolve resolves nothing (though not for lack of trying on his part), Dorcas could pass for Jaclyn Smith if she really wanted to, and Emmeline Vance takes over as Gideon's conscience.

**DETAIL ORIENTED** \- _SEPTEMBER 6TH, 2006_ \-  Issue 28, Volume 2

 **Vol de Mort takes flight with some new birds and has death for dinner**  
 _Riddle's latest gig plays on my gag reflex_

By Rita Skeeter | Editor

I can't quite put my finger on it, dear readers, but there's just _something_ about what T.M. Riddle is calling 'the new era' that makes me want to pledge allegiance to a nunnery and shut the muffin shop for good. An elitist team of co-designers isn't really a surprising move considering the disappointment that followed the release of his "On the Streets" line (more commonly referred to in the biz as "Hobo Trash," or so I'm told), but the man is really starting to creep me out. "Death Eaters"? Honestly, now, what the hell is _that_ supposed to symbolize?

Perhaps Riddle is reaching for straws here, attempting to shock the public into once again feeling enamoured by wearing dead animals for frocks. But what do I know?

Vol de Mort held a press conference in London yesterday, and the place was packed from floor to ceiling, let me tell you. _Packed_. Luckily, because my _extracurricular_ activities have helped me to develop rather agile reflexes, I found myself in the front of the scrum, tape recorder so close to Riddle's arse I could smell the talcum powder. He announced a coming together of some of the hottest independent designers of the times, ranging from hotshot leather addict Alecto Carrows and her stupid as fuck brother Amycus, to the slick and disgustingly charming Antonin Dolohov, a man known for outfits more skin than fabric. All the designers on the roster as known for their appreciation of clothes so tight they could be painted on, questionable sexuality, and disturbing business practices.

Teaming with the Queen Bee in a honey pot of horrors is a smart business move, one would suppose, and Riddle needs all the help he can get at this point in his career, providing he doesn't want to fall back into obscurity and go back to fronting a Hootie and the Blowfish tribute band. But was the decision made on something more than business savvy?

Whispers in the willows, dear readers, tell this reporter that a group of ninnies with Jesus complexes have been trying to take Riddle out for years, smashing the smarmy bastard with radishes and chaining themselves to trees. One _wouldn't dare_ to speculate that the "Death Eaters" could be a coalition against the do-gooders, so to speak. Luckily, I, your fearless editor, am not your typical "one" and I think that's _exactly_ what he's doing.

Whether or not I'm right is of no consequence. It does, however, raise some interesting questions.

What does Riddle plan to use these "Death Eaters" for? How big of a thorn in his side are these activists? Is Riddle even _capable_ of combating a clearly not-so-secret organization? What does this organization do? What is it called? Does it exist?

One _might_ consider asking a Prewett brother. That is, if one knows where to look.

As usual, this reporter wishes to leave you to draw your own conclusions. Keep your ears up and your eyes open.

This is the mouth with the message, signing out.

***

The bacon was simmering in the frying pan and Molly pushed it about idly with the spatula. It was 7:30, and the kids were already up and running amuck, Arthur had gone to work, Gideon and Fabian were sitting at the table reading the post and sipping coffee, and Molly herself had about the worst morning sickness of her six pregnancies. Including the twins, who'd been little wretches. She had started daydreaming about soda crackers when Gideon spit his coffee all over the place, and into the children's cereal bowls.

"What. The. Hell," he stated, eyebrows creasing into concern and something else, slightly foreboding. "Fay, have you seen this?

"Watch you language in front of the children," Molly scolded automatically, as Charlie began to cry.

"Uncle Giddy spit in my porridge!" he wailed.

Fay, ever the problem solver, reached out and stirred Charlie's porridge. "Look, it's gone!"

"No it isn't! You didn't take it out," Charlie sniffled, confusion now overpowering his desire to cry.

"Well, you can't see it, and you won't be able to taste it," Fay said reasonably, smiling at his nephew. "Just taste it. Go on."

"You're ridiculous, Fabian Prewett," Molly said, rolling her eyes.

Charlie ignored his mother and tasted his porridge before looking up at Fay with a smile. "It tastes the same."

"Disaster averted. Now eat it, you little rascal," Fay answered, and then got up and walked around the table to look over Gideon's shoulder. "What on earth caused a reaction like that?"

Gideon gestured to the little independent magazine he was holding in his hands. It had been sitting on the kitchen table when Gideon came upstairs, and had caught his attention almost immediately because the headline referred to Riddle. Gideon didn't even bother to ask where it had come from. That is, not until he'd read the third to last line of _Rita Skeeter's_ editorial. "Just read it," Gideon instructed his brother, still in shock.

"Detail Oriented," Fabian said. "I've seen this around a bit. They have press boxes for it at some coffee shops and things."

Doing as told, Fabian read. It was sort of funny, though nothing exceptional enough to merit spitting out coffee. Then, he got to the line Gideon had been referring to.

"What the hell indeed!" he said, jaw dropping.

"Language, brothers! Watch your mouths around my children!" Molly said, exasperated.

"Sorry Mols, but we're _named_!" Fabian said, stunned. "Gideon, half the kids in town read this!"

"I suppose that's what she was counting on," Gideon said, running his hand through his hair. "'Ask a Prewett'... I mean. Where's she getting her shi - I mean, information?"

"Don't know. Who is she? Have you ever met her? _Rita Skeeter_?" Fabian asked, frowning as he read her name off the article. "What's this going to do to the Order, do you think?"

"Ah, well. Make it not-so-secret, as she suggests. And no, I've never heard of her. D'you suppose it's a coincidence that this was sitting on the kitchen table waiting for us?" Gideon asked. What in _God's name_ were they going to do about _this_?

"It was in the post box," Molly chirped.

"Well. She obviously knows us _and_ where we live," Fabian said dryly. "I guess we can be glad she didn't publish our address. Not that we aren't easy enough to track down by last name or anything."

Fabian was glad it was a Saturday and he didn't work. He fully intended to see what he could find out about Rita Skeeter, and to see if he could get his hands on any back issues of Detail Oriented.

"You don't suppose she's mentioned anything like this before, do you?" Gideon asked.

"We probably would've heard of it, don't you think?" Fabian asked. "I've seen a couple of our younger members reading this at meetings. I've never bothered to pick one up myself, though."

"Same. The little _wretch_ ," Gideon said, frowning. "There goes the afternoon then. What's the bet that she's done the same thing with the other Order members? And how long before they're ringing us up?"

"Do you really think she knows who all the members are?" Fabian asked. "I mean, knowing an organization exists is one thing, and from there figuring out who runs it isn't hard. I mean, how many times have we been arrested for Riddle related things now? But I should think it'd be a bit more difficult to figure out who exactly is _in_ it."

"She might not know all," Gideon said, "But it wouldn't be hard to figure out some. Look at the crowd we knock about with, eh? Sirius, James and Lily have all been arrested before. We were all at the Potter's wedding..." he trailed off.

"This is such a mess," Fabian sighed. "Maybe we can spin it our way? I mean, use it to expand the Order? With the spy and all that, who're we hiding from anymore? We can't exactly just come out and go public, as I'm sure Riddle would find someway to get us shut down, but we can use this press, can't we? To get new recruits?"

"Maybe," Gideon mused. "I mean... I suppose it could go either way."

"Well, you've always been the better decision maker of the two of us," Fabian said, smiling wryly as he stated the obvious. "What do you think we should do?"

Gideon sighed. "Ride it out, see where it goes. Hopefully it'll just be a big pile of nothing."

"Your decision is 'do nothing'?" Fabian asked with a snort. "What an inspiring leader you are."

"What does in-spring mean?" Percy asked.

"It means that Uncle Giddy is the king of the castle," Gideon said, and then smirked at his nephew. "And _you're_ the dirty rascal."

"I'm not dirty!" Percy said, sounding surprisingly haughty for a child not yet even four. "I always wash my hands before eating. Mummy tol' me to."

"Speaking of Mummy," Fay said, and lifted Charlie down off of his chair. Molly had left the kitchen, and Fabian supposed she was busy in the loo, retching her guts up. "If you lot are all done eating, why don't you run off and find her? Uncles Giddy and Fabby need to have an adult talk with all sorts of bad words your dear old mum doesn't want you to know."

"Like... like... poop?" Charlie asked endearingly, and giggled as he said it.

Gideon laughed. "Even worse," he said. "Now run off, go on." When the last of the tots had run off to find Molly, Gideon looked at his brother and clucked his tongue. "Well," he said, feeling the word vomit creeping up his throat. "My entire world has pretty much gone to shit. How about yours?"

"Well. Aside from worries about the Order, I'm pretty much fine," Fabian answered, frowning at his brother. "You, however, have more issues than the stack of Playboys under your bed. You're a mess lately. Things with Hestia not going well?"

Gideon took a deep breath. "It's..." _Fuck_ this was hard to say. No one in the world knew Gideon better than Fabian... except maybe Marlene and even that seemed questionable as of late. Fabian was either going to kill him for not telling before, or hug him until he turned blue. "It's not Hestia," Gideon choked out. "I mean, she's nice, and, it's like... we're trying but... She knows and. I... There's always been someone else for me. But I can't have her anymore."

"Oh," Fabian said, surprised. His first thought was, admittedly, _Always? There's always been someone else? Who? And why don't I know about it?_ But he pushed back his selfish feelings of betrayal (they were separate people, they didn't need to know _everything_ about one another) and focussed on how pinched Gideon looked. So, Fabian got up, and put a hand on Gideon's shoulder.

"Well, come on then. I think it's best we have this conversation in the basement, rather than at Molly's breakfast table. Besides, even if we're doing nothing, there's still damage control that needs to be planned. You can talk while I make lists Remus Lupin could be proud of. Sound good?"

Gideon nodded. "Okay," he said, standing, and then added. "I should've told you all this back in high school."

"Since _high school_ , Gideon, _are you kidding me_?" Fay commented, unable to resist. Recalling all the times the past few months that Fay had thought Gid looked like he was working far too hard, though, reminded Fabian of what was important. "Never mind. It doesn't matter. You look like shit and now I'm bloody worried. I should've noticed early. Go!"

With that, Fabian pushed Gid determinedly towards the door to the basement. They were going to talk, and if he couldn't fix Gideon, at least he was going to be able to support him.

Gideon nearly fell down the stairs with Fabian's pushing him along, and was more than thankful to touch level ground again and then collapse in his chair. He scratched the scruff on his neck as Fabian sat across from him, looking expectant. Gideon hadn't the slightest clue where to even begin.

"What's going on, Gid?" Fabian asked gently. "I mean, hell. High school was practically a decade back for you. You should know better than to keep important things from me for that long."

Gideon pursed his lips. "Do you remember--and I'm stretching it here--but do you remember that day I walked in on you and Elphias? And then we talked afterward?"

Fabian didn't reply. Instead, he gave Gideon an obvious look and nodded. Of _course_ Fabian remembered it. He'd never forget the day his brother found out he liked blokes. He just wasn't sure what that had to do with Gideon's secret. Fabian's jaw dropped.

"You're _not_ gay."

Gideon screwed up his face. "What? No! I mean, I was talking about a woman upstairs wasn't I?" Gideon shook his head, and his voice dropped unnaturally (partly with incredulity at Fabian's statement, partly with his own fear of admitting this to his brother) as he said, "Just... remember how I told you about the first time mum caught me with a bird? The shagging her from behind and grandkids bit?"

"Right, of course. Silly me," Fabian said, waving a hand in front of his face. Momentary insanity. Wouldn't that have been funny, though? "Yeah, I remember. What about it?"

"Ah, the girl in question, was. Um." Gideon swallowed hard. "It was Marlene."

"Kinny," Fay deadpanned, more confused than disbelieving. There was no reason for Gid to lie, obviously. "I... that's... I thought you two were just best mates?"

"Well. We were. Up until one day I walked in on her naked and the dynamic shifted a little," Gideon said, looking at his sock feet. "We. We dated for about two and a half years, actually. I even bought her a promise ring. On our one year."

"Wow," Fabian said. "So, uh. What's this business about not being able to have her? I know she's seeing Stubby, but I always sort of thought you were her main man."

Gideon laughed awkwardly. "I broke up with her on our graduation day. That broken nose came from her, not Stubby. At least I think I said it was Stubby at the time."

"Wow," Fabian said again. "But that was grad. That was ages ago. What's happened in the mean time?"

"I fucked around and she didn't date, basically. Then about... two years ago? We got pretty drunk and she got my name tattooed on her arse. I convinced her to go out with me again. It lasted for two weeks. I royally fucked it up that time."

"She has your _name_ tattooed on her _arse_? Good _lord_ ," Fabian snorted, shaking his head. "I'm starting to feel like a broken record, but, well, what happened?"

Gideon looked at Fabian sadly. "I asked her to marry me."

"You. What. You asked Marlene McKinnon to marry you and you didn't even _tell_ me?" Fabian said, and then sighed. Gideon looked absolutely miserable. "She said no, I take it? Why? It sounds rather like she's mad about you, what with the tattoo and all."

"Just..." Gideon paused, and then winced. "She just _flipped_ at me, and she tried to run, and I told her that if she left, that was it, basically. That was the night you and Arthur found me."

"Gideon! I was so worried to death about you, and you wouldn't say a bloody word," Fabian said, remembering how panicked he'd been, and how he'd gotten even _more_ panicked when they'd found Gideon and Gideon had just moped silently and refused to explain. "But that was, Gid, that was _years_ ago."

"Yeah. It was," Gideon said, looking at his socks again. "I was a prat at Lily and James' wedding too. I asked her to dance, and just... made a fool of myself, I suppose. And I saw her yesterday when I ran to the market for Mols, and just... _fuck_ , Fabian, it's like someone punches me in the stomach every time I lay eyes on her."

"Oh Gideon," Fabian said softly. "What does she think? I mean, it's _Marlene_. She's always been Gideon this and Gideon that. Surely she can be convinced? I could talk to her..."

Gideon shook his head. "I think... I think Kin and I are way past that now. She's with Stubby now, right? Even though she said she never would and he just... slid in after the fucking proposal fiasco and now he dangles it in front of my face. Fucking smarmy bastard. He doesn't even _love_ her, he just loves the _idea_ of her."

"You're an absolute wreck about her, aren't you?" Fabian mused, more speaking to himself than Gideon. He knew his brother. Gideon was the dedicated sort. If he loved her, which Fabian didn't doubt, Fabian thought he probably wouldn't ever let himself be happy without her. "Are you at all alright?"

"I don't..." Gideon started, but nothing positive came to mind. "No. I don't think so."

Well. Fabian couldn't help it. He was a total romantic, and this was his brother. The two facts combined along with everything Gid had just told him had Fabian's heart aching.

"Stand up," Fabian instructed. "I want to give you a proper hug."

Gideon obliged half-heartedly.

Fabian pulled him into a tight embrace. Fabian was the physical sort. He punctuated sentences with touch, sometimes. It was second nature to him. While Gideon wasn't quite the typical macho man, he certainly wasn't as used to hugging as Fabian was. Not that it bothered Fabian. Fabian still squeezed him tight and held on.

"You're both probably just being daft about it, you know," Fay said fiercely. "She'll come to her senses and you two will work it out. There'll be a happy ending. I know it."

Pulling away, trying not to cry (and Gideon _hated_ crying, but he seemed to be doing it more and more as of late), Gideon shook his head. "We can hardly speak to one another anymore, Fay. I don't think there's anything left."

"Nonsense," Fabian said determinedly, heart clenching at the sight of tears in his brother's eyes. "Chin up, big brother. Things _will_ work out. You just have to have faith."

Gideon actually laughed this time. More to himself than to Fabian, he said, "I lost that a long time ago," and sat back down.

"Gideon Andrew Maxwell Prewett," Fabian said. "You are breaking your brother's heart. Honestly. I'm about to burst into tears. Do you really think it's that hopeless?"

"That's what she told me at the wedding," Gideon answered. "That she just didn't love me anymore."

"But you love her, don't you?"

"Yes," Gideon answered, without hesitation.

"And we both know that Kinny is full of shit sometimes," Fabian said flippantly. "That means there's still hope. You may be tired of it, but I'm fresh to the situation, and you know how I get about love. I'm a big mush. So I'll help. What can I do?"

Gideon rubbed his eyes with the palms of his hands. "Fabian, I mean... what could you possibly do to fix a decade old mess?"

"I don't know. I'll think of something. I'll seduce Stubby or something so that you can have a go at Marlene," Fabian rambled, hoping at the very least for a smile. He'd never seen Gid quite like this. He didn't know what else to do but trivialize. "Caradoc won't be pleased, but I'm sure he'll understand."

Gideon snorted. "You're ridiculous."

"Seriously. You look like that song. Stolen bike, dead puppy, fallen ice cream cone, however it goes," Fabian said sadly, sitting down on a bean bag chair with an oomph, the fight going out of him a little. After regarding Gideon thoughtfully for a moment, he added, "Times a million, of course. I can hardly bear to look at you."

"I've been in a trance for a few months, really," Gideon said. "I thought it would all work itself out for the better, but it hasn't. Instead it's gotten worse, and to be completely honest with you, I haven't the will to keep going like this anymore. It's just fucking bullshit."

"Then we need a plan. Screw damage control for the Order. We need damage control for your love life," Fabian said, feeling a little panicked. "The first question is, of course, to hang on or to let go."

Not that it was as simple as just choosing one or the other, Fabian knew. Hanging on didn't guarantee him another shot with Marlene, and letting go didn't mean he wouldn't think about her every minute. But once Gideon picked one, Fay could help. Maybe not significantly, but in little ways, he hoped.

"Fabian," Gideon started softly, tired. "You have to understand... I'll _never_ let her go. Unfortunately for my psyche, right now there is no Gideon without Marlene."

"Okay," Fabian replied, thinking hard. "So hang on, then. That means we just have to wait until she admits to herself that Stubby is wrong for her."

Fabian didn't bother to say that he'd talk to Marlene. He wasn't sure what Gideon would think about it, but honestly, he wasn't sure how long he would be able to manage _not_ bringing it up to her, not when Gideon was in the state he was. Fabian couldn't help that he was a bit of a busybody, especially not where Gideon was concerned.

"Good luck with that," Gideon mumbled.

Fabian sighed. He guessed he'd be able to put off talking to Marlene for about as long as it took him to shake Gideon and get to Marlene's house.

"Okay, look. You're going to bed. After you have a nap and eat some more of Molly's wonderful food, you're going to go see the Longbottoms and the Potters. I'll take Sirius and Remus, Bones, and Meadows. Oh, and you can find Emmeline. Since Pettigrew is back in London for a while, we can call him tonight. Oh, and don't worry about Marlene, I'll handle her. I'll leave you the copy of Detail Oriented that got delivered to us, and I'll pick one up on my way. We ought to talk to the core before this gets out of hand, you know?"

Sure, so Gideon would see right through it, but at least he'd gone to the effort to make it seem like he wasn't just dashing off to pester Marlene.

Gideon looked at his brother and raised his eyebrows. "You're as transparent as cellophane. You know that, right?"

"I'm sure I don't know _what_ you're thinking in that pretty little head of yours. You just sleep, and I'll get busy with all this Order business," Fabian said, smiling. "I'll meet you back here for tea around four if we don't run into each other sooner. Sound good?"

"Sounds fine," Gideon answered. "As though I have any choice."

"Just try and cheer up, will you? I'll even bring some fudge home with me," Fay said, getting up and kissing Gideon's forehead like their mother used to. "I love you, you know that? I know I'm just your brother and not a certain bird named Marlene McKinnon, but still. It ought to count for something."

Gideon smiled. "I love you too, little brother," he said. "And what's more, I appreciate you. Even if my head is up my arse most of the time."

"Thanks, Gid. I try. And chin up!" Fabian said for the second time and headed for the door.

He had a girl to see about a boy. Well, and an article, but that was _certainly_ secondary.

***

Marlene jogged to the door rolling her eyes. "I'm coming!" she called, irritated at whomever was on the other side, persistently ringing the doorbell.

"What do you-" she started after she'd managed to open the door, but was cut off when a magazine was shoved under her nose. "Fabian? What the hell?"

"We've been published. I'm going to find this Skeeter girl and have a nice chat. But for now, we've got to talk to the core," Fabian explained, stepping past her into her flat with a smile. "I'm coming in for a chat. Hope you're not busy. Mind if I put on some tea?"

Marlene stepped back, letting Fabian inside. "What do you mean we've been published?" she asked, taking the magazine from Fabian. "And who's 'Skeeter'?"

"Just read it, woman. That's why I gave it to you," Fabian said with a grin and made for the kitchen, which was, thanks to the size of Marlene's flat, only a few steps from the front door. Fabian had been there quite a few times, but it never failed to surprise him. "You need to get a flatmate and move into a bigger place. How exactly is it that you don't feel lonely and smothered all at once here?"

Marlene shrugged. "If letting you in comes with comments from the peanut gallery, you can go back outside," she said, settling into a chair and starting to read. "Make your tea and leave my flat alone."

Fabian mimed zipping his lips and let her read in peace as he prepared the tea and hunted for biscuits or something to snack on. He found some dodgy looking cake in the fridge and pulled it out, sniffing at it. "How old is this? And are you finished reading yet?"

Marlene was at the end of the article, and her eyes went wide at the mention of a Prewett. "What the fuck? How did she...?" Glancing at Fabian sniffing month old cake, she screwed up her face. "I think that's from my birthday, actually."

"You're disgusting," Fabian said, pulling the cake away immediately and dropping it in the rubbish bin, plate and all. Marlene was giving him a look, though, so after a moment, he reached in and gingerly pulled the dish out, dropping it in the sink and washing his hands. "Anyway, we don't know any more than you do at the moment. Just thought we ought to warn everyone. So I'm activating the phone tree, if you will. Spread the word."

"Well, this. She can't possibly know about _everyone_ , can she?" Marlene asked. "I mean it's not exactly hard to take you two for activists against Riddle or anything, but what would she know about the Order?"

"We don't _know_ , Kinny. I told you, we've not spoken to her. She just stuck this in our post box, so all we can do is speculate," Fabian said impatiently. "Look, I actually have something else I want to talk to you about."

Laying the magazine down on the table, Marlene smirked. "First off, what have I told you about calling me Kinny? Second of all, let me guess. You're the host of an interior decorating show and I've been nominated for a make-over?"

"Only Gid has permission to call you Kinny, hm?" Fabian commented, raising his eyebrows at her. "And as much as I'd love to fix up your ugly apartment, I haven't the money. I'm here because you broke my brother's heart, Marlene."

Marlene blanched. "I... What?"

"Would you believe I had no idea until today?" Fabian asked with a sigh. "He told me all about it, and honestly Marlene, you should've seen him. He had _tears_ in his eyes. He's miserable. You've got to pull your head out your arse and patch things up with him."

Marlene frowned. "Oh, so he's been telling you that _I'm_ the one with their head up their arse?"

"No. He's been telling me you've _both_ got your heads up your arses, but as far as I can tell, _he's_ at least _tried_ to pull his out, and yours is still firmly lodged." Fabian gave her a stern look. "He loves you, Marlene. How do you feel about him?"

"No, this isn't about love anymore, not with Gideon," Marlene said, not bothering to really answer the question. "He just. He thinks he still loves me. There's no way, not after all this time... no. He tried this at Lily and James' wedding and now he knows I'm not going to listen to his bullshit anymore, so he's sent you to do his dirty work."

"Don't be daft. He hasn't sent me anywhere. Like I could find out about all this and _not_ come," Fabian said. Tea forgotten, he sat down next to Marlene and said seriously, "Marlene. He loves you. He really loves you. I'm his brother, I can tell things like this. What I'm asking you is if you still care about him at all or if you really have moved on like you told Gideon."

She was sick of dealing with this. _He'd_ broken up with _her_ first, and then had to go and be the big idiot that he was and propose to her. "Gideon wants what he thinks he wants. I'd go back to him and we'd be broken up again in a week because he'd find something new to amuse himself with," Marlene said, even though she knew she was lying to herself. "And I've obviously moved on, Fabian. I'm with Stubby, aren't I?"

"Oh, yeah, the glamorous life of a rock star’s girlfriend," Fabian said softly, his eyes sad as he looked at Marlene. "Well, either you're telling the truth and Gideon's making himself sick with misery over a lost cause, or you're lying to yourself and missing out on a great thing. In either case, there's nothing I can do, I suppose. I'd best get going. I've got to talk to the others."

Marlene's eyes narrowed and her cheeks grew red. "Don't tell me what I'm missing out on, Fabian Prewett," she said angrily. "You weren't there. You don't know everything. You only know what Gideon's told you. It wasn't all roses and smiles and _love_. It was fucking _painful_ , and I just... I can't put myself through that again. It's not worth it."

"Being afraid of getting hurt doesn't save you from anything. It only makes you miss out," Fabian said firmly. "Look. If you really don't love him, than fine. I understand that, and it bloody sucks, but Gideon's going to have to get over it. But if you _do_ love him and you're just afraid, than I think you're making a mistake. I don't doubt he hurt you. He's a great prat sometimes. But I _am_ sure he never meant to, and I don't think it's fair of you to punish him forever."

"Fabian," Marlene started, "You're done. Leave, please."

Fabian's eyebrows rose for a moment before he nodded stonily. "Gideon's right. You do run. You just run away from any situation you don't want to deal with, don't you? Like me calling you on all the 'Gideon isn't worth it' rubbish, because you _know_ he is." Marlene tried to interrupt, but Fabian just stood up and spoke over her. "Well, just so you know exactly what you're running away from, Gideon means it. He meant it when he proposed and he meant it at the wedding and he bloody means it while he's moping in our sodding basement. He loves you. If you want to run from that, fine. But I think you're _wrong_. You should -- "

"SHUT UP!" Marlene shouted. "You just _don't_ stop, Fabian! Get out! I _don't_ want to listen to you anymore!"

Fabian shut his mouth and shook his head. She obviously still felt something, so Fabian just didn't get why she was making them both so miserable.

Instead of attempting to say anything else, he just turned on his heel and walked out the door. He had to go see Sirius and Remus. Cor, when he finally heard the story of how they'd gotten together, he'd thought _they_ were ridiculous for taking so bloody long and being so stubborn. They had _nothing_ on Gideon and Marlene, though.

Fabian wasn't sure they'd ever figure their shit out. And Marlene would probably never speak to Fabian again on top of it.

Well. He'd tried, at least. That was more than he could say for Marlene.

***

"Just a second!" James shouted in the general direction of the door. He handed the baby to Lily and bolted for the door, covered in milk that had been spit up all over his shirt. Harry had gotten a bit of a cold, and he was miserable with it. He spent all his time crying (like now) or fussing (starting from about five that morning) or spitting up (evidenced by the state of James' shirt and hair).

James pulled his soiled shirt off as he threw the door open, grinning as he came face to face with Gideon.

"Hey mate," he said and stepped back. "Come on in. Harry's in a right state, so don't mind the unholy screaming. What brings you over?"

Gideon winced at the sound echoing through the house. "Good set of lungs, at least. You got the consolation he'll be raising hell with the best of them. And do you often walk around shirtless?" He handed James the copy of Rita's article, and sighed. "Read that."

"Not so often as Sirius," James said, lips quirking. He held up his shirt as he added with a wrinkled nose, "Covered in baby goo." Tossing the shirt in the vague direction of the laundry room and taking the papers Gideon held out, he began to scan, rambling all the while. "Blah, blah, Riddle's a twat, blah, blah, group of ninnies--oi, we're not ninnies! And we _don't_ have Jesus complexes... Whoa. Pause. There's a name. Is she allowed to do that? Publish your last names while she's _totally blowing our cover_?"

Gideon shrugged. "There's no law that says she can't, so far as I know. And Fay and I have no idea who the bint is. We can only speculate as to how she got a hold of that."

"Come on, kitchen. Brace yourself for the lungs of doom," James said with a wry grin and walked into the kitchen to show Lily. He held out the article and reached for Harry, saying, "Here, trade you."

Lily made the switch with a breath of relief. "Hello, Gideon. What's this?"

"It's mostly about Riddle and his goings on, but there's some on the Order. The Prewett brothers are named at the bottom," James said, bouncing Harry on his hip, making a face at his son. Harry continued to scream, and James pleaded, "Harry, you little loudmouth. You are giving mummy and daddy and Gideon headaches. Be _quiet_. Please."

Harry, unfortunately for the three adults, refused to comply.

Lily ran a hand through her hair and scanned the article with her brow furrowed. "Indeed," she murmured quietly, and handed the magazine back to Gideon with a frown. "So you're here to... what? Call a code red?"

Gideon shook his head. "Just letting everyone know what's going on, face to face. I think it's gone a little beyond just Riddle now, if we're being leaked to the public."

"It's bollocks, is what it is," James said, and then shot a guilty look at Harry. "I mean, it's bad news. Publicity is not our friend, in my opinion, simply because most of the things we do aren't exactly legal. It's not so bad for us, as our identities are just based on speculation, really, but you two being named, well. You'd best watch your backs even more now, as if you didn't have enough to worry about."

Rolling his eyes, Gideon said. "I don't exactly have anything to lose at this point, James."

"Don't say that. It'll invoke Murphy's law," James quipped and knocked three times rapidly on the nearest bit of wood. It happened to be the doorframe near Gideon's head. "I haven't got much of a mind for pessimism, but things can _always_ get worse. You know as well as I do that Riddle's off his rocker."

Gideon nodded absently. "Yes. Well, in any case, I need to get going again. Take care of yourselves, alright? And your bellowing child."

"We could say the same to you, Gideon," Lily said. "Minus the bellowing child bit."

"Unless you count Fabian," James added with a mischievous, lopsided grin. "Though he's more of a screamer than a bellower from what I've heard."

Gideon burst out laughing, and smiled broadly. "You shouldn't be making comments like that around your kid, James," he said. "He might get the wrong idea."

James just snickered and said, "You want to stay for tea or something, or are you in a hurry to get away from Mr. Lungs, here?"

Harry wasn't screaming quite as loudly as he had been before, but he was still whining and crying and generally being miserable. There was a great glob of snot dripping down his face, too, so James reached down and wiped it off with Harry's shirt, hoping Lily wouldn't notice.

"No, I really do have to get going. People to see, all that," Gideon answered. "And no offence to Harry, but he is rather vocal and dripping."

"James!" Lily admonished, catching him in the act. "Use a wipe, honestly, not his clothes!"

"Sorry, sorry," James muttered unapologetically and leaned over to plop a smack of a kiss on Lily's cheek. "Well, see you around then, mate. Pop over any time. I swear I'm usually fully clothed and this little monster generally pretends to be good for company."

***

Fabian rung the buzzer for Sirius and Remus' flat three times in quick succession and then waited.

"Who is it?" Sirius asked into the speaker, his mouth full of toast.

"It's me, lover bunny. I got off work early for a shag," Fabian sang, doing a very poor imitation of Remus indeed. "Let me up."

"Lover bunny... he's never used that one," Sirius commented idly to himself and swallowed his mouthful of breakfast before buzzing Fabian in and unlatching the door. "And perhaps I should put on some trousers," he added, wandering into his and Remus' bedroom.

Fabian took the stairs two at a time and didn't bother knocking when he got to their door. It was unlocked, so he just walked in. "I've got a surprise for you, Black. Where are you?"

"Making myself presentable," Sirius answered, walking out of the bedroom in a pair of heart printed boxers. "I would've gone all out for you, darling, but I couldn't find my jeans. Remus packs everything away in an orderly fashion and it's distressing to my organizational habits. Tea? Toast?"

"Tea would be great, actually. Marlene made me some, but I didn't end up drinking it," Fabian said, rolling his eyes. He tossed the article at Sirius and settled into a stool at their kitchen counter. "Feast your eyes on that."

Sirius took a mug out of the cupboard and set it in front of Fabian before reaching to the stove for the teapot. He's boiled the water already, and his own cup was sitting on the counter. Handing off the pot to Fabian, Sirius picked up the magazine and started reading it. He mumbled through most of it, words like 'ninnies' and 'Jesus' barely audible. When he reached the part about the Prewetts, however, his eyes went wide and he looked at Fabian with alarm.

"What the hell?"

Fabian poured himself a cuppa and waited for Sirius to finish. As he looked up, Fabian just smiled grimly. "Yeah. _Yeah_. That's exactly what Gid said. Anyway, we're not quite sure yet what sort of effect this will have. We just thought we'd warn the core at least, so you lot would have a heads up since you're all the most likely to be singled out aside from us."

"Do you lot know her, then?" Sirius asked, taking a sip from his own mug.

"Nope, never met her. She knows us though, apparently. We had a copy of this in our post box this morning," Fabian said. "I expect we'll be trying to get in touch soon. Don't suppose you know her?"

"There's a Rita who's at the bar like, every evening," Sirius answered. "A loud, obnoxious drunk with this ludicrously curled hair. Weird bird. Fits the profile I suppose."

"Interesting," Fabian said. "Thanks. Look, you'll pass the message along to Remus, won't you? That we've been found out? Though he may already know. I think the library stocks this rubbish in the local interest section."

"He might, though I don't know if he'd read it," Sirius said. "But yeah... I'll tell him. Man. This is getting ridiculous, isn't it?"

"You're telling me," Fabian replied, rolling his eyes. "I wonder if this Skeeter bird has an inside source, or if it's just wild speculation that the formation of the Death Eaters is on account of us."

Sirius shrugged. "Hopefully she's just trying to stir up shit. I'd rather not think about him going right to town and organizing a 'let's kill the activists' squad."

"Well, in any case, I guess only time will tell," Fabian said. He swallowed the last mouthful of his tea and said, "Look, I've got to get going. I've still got to find Dorcas and Edgar. Thanks for the tea."

"Oh, it's fine," Sirius said, mock sniffling. "Love me and leave me Fabian Prewett. I know your type."

***

"Coming!" Alice called brightly as the doorbell rang. She was feeding Neville while Frank did their own lunch dishes, and she draped a baby blanket over her shoulder for decency's sake, carrying little Nevvie with her as she got up to answer the door. "Oh, hello Gideon. Come on in."

"Not interrupting anything, am I?" Gideon asked, stepping into the house and remembering to take off his shoes. Alice was always adamant about that.

"No, no, we just finished lunch and now it's Nevvie's turn," Alice replied brightly. "Frank is in the kitchen. Would you like anything to eat or drink?"

"No, that's fine," Gideon answered. "I'm meeting up with Fabian in a bit. Following Alice to the kitchen he said, "I just have something to show you and Frank."

Alice sat down at the table again, shifting Neville a little in her arms as she looked up at Gideon, concerned. "Is everything all right?"

"Hello Frank," Gideon said, taking a seat. "And, well. That depends really."

Frank dried his hands and sat down next to his wife. "What's going on then?"

Gideon slid Rita's magazine across the table and pointed at the article. "Read that."

Alice and Frank leaned together, scanning the article at the same time, though, if Alice's gasp of surprise was any indication, she reached the end first and looked up at Gideon, wide-eyed.

"How did she know? I mean, certainly people know we protest against Vol de Mort and Riddle and all that, but claiming you and Fabian are in charge of a secret society... do you think she found out from the spy?"

Gideon shrugged. "We can only speculate," he answered. "But it's out there now. We just thought it'd be best to warn the core ahead of time. Chances are, if she knows about myself and Fabian, she probably knows about you lot as well."

"Right, of course. Well, thank you for telling us so promptly," Alice said, chewing her lip worriedly. Neville began to fuss so she distracted herself for a moment with pulling her shirt back up properly and shifting Neville to the outside of the blanket, resting him against her shoulder and patting his back.

Frank let out a low whistle. "Well. It just keeps getting better and better now, doesn't it?"

Gideon smiled softly. "Pessimistic as it sounds, things'll get worse before they get better."

"Of course they will," Alice said, her voice tight. She got up from the table, walking stiffly to the window, clutching Neville tightly to her chest. She wouldn't let anything happen to him.

Gideon sighed. "I know we offered this before, but I really want to put it out there again. For the time being... do you want to take a break? For Neville's sake."

Alice took a deep breath and turned around to face Frank and Gideon. Her eyes were bright with tears. "You have to understand, it isn't that I don't support the cause. I do, you know I do, and our home will always be open to any members of the Order that need it. But... I just, Frankie, I just can't justify it. I'm not as strong as James and Lily, perhaps, but if anything ever happened, I couldn't..."

Frank gulped and stood, walking over and wrapping his arms around his wife. "Honey bear, it's okay. I understand. But you're just as strong as Lily, don't think you're not. But if you want to stop... we will."

Still sitting, feeling awkward, Gideon looked at his hands. There were many things in his life he'd come to regret and he _really_ hoped that the Order wouldn't be one of them.

"I don't want to, but I think I have to," Alice said softly, leaning into Frank.

She always thought she'd be able to do anything with him at her side. Until Neville was born, sweet, polite little Alice Svenski had been able to smile at Riddle as she and the others blockaded a road to stop him from coming through. She'd cheerfully ignored his threats and held Frank's hand and been proud of her power to stop Riddle's destruction. Now, though. Now she was Alice Longbottom and she had a son and every threat Riddle had ever made seemed so much more real now that there was this little defenceless miracle in her life that Alice loved and needed and wanted to protect. Things were different now.

"Things are different now. I'm sorry, Gideon," Alice said softly. "I can't put my son in any more danger. You understand, don't you?"

"Of course I do," Gideon answered. "Fabian and I... we didn't envision it going this far. And we're sorry that it's come to this."

"We do what we can," Frank said. "And deal with the consequences of our actions. Unfortunately, in this case I don't think that Riddle's retaliation is going to be all sunshine and rainbows."

"No," Gideon agreed. "Decidedly not."

***

Fabian had rung the doorbell and was now waiting. After a moment, the door swung open to reveal the smiling face, flour-covered t-shirt, and ruffled apron of Edgar's mother. The smell of fresh baking made Fabian smile. Mrs. Bones sort of reminded him of his own mother, in some ways. Sometimes even more than Molly did.

"Afternoon, Mrs. Bones," he said brightly. "Is Edgar around?"

"Oh, hello Fabian, dear," Anna Bones said, holding the door open for the young man to come inside. "Eddie's just downstairs with his lovely girlfriend, if you please. Unless, of course, you'd like to keep his old mum company, hmm?" she teased.

"You know I'd love to, Mrs. Bones, but I'm actually on a mission," Fabian said cheerily, stepping inside and closing the door behind him. "I'll stop for a visit on my way out, and perhaps steal some of whatever it is you're baking. It smells wonderful."

"Oh, just some cookies. I'll save you one," she said. "Go on then. They said something about watching a movie."

"You're fabulous, Mrs. B," Fay said and then headed for the stairs to the basement. He paused at the bottom, knocking lightly before coming around the corner. He'd heard enough about their bedroom activities to know it was always best to check, even if their mother was right upstairs. "It's just Fabian. You both decent?"

"Yeah, sure, come the fuck in," Dorcas called cheekily, even though they'd just gotten through a nice, acrobatic round of sex and they were both starkers under the blanket.

"Hello, mate," Edgar, shifting a little uncomfortably. "Erm. Sorry about the... state of things."

Dorcas, however, made a show of stretching, letting the blanket slide up a bit at the side, showing a long strip of skin from knee to armpit, but not letting anything too scandalous make an appearance. All of her good bits belonged to Ed anyway. She just wanted to make sure Fabian knew what he'd been about five minutes from walking in on.

"No worries," Fay said, rolling his eyes. "I suppose it's common knowledge, but Ed? Your girlfriend is a tart."

Edgar laughed. "I've got no problem with it," he said. "To what do we owe the pleasure, anyhow?"

"Oh, right. Silly Fabian got distracted by nudity," he said and leered dramatically at the part of Ed's chest not covered by the blanket. He tossed them the article and sat down on the loveseat just across from the bed they were cozied on. "Read that and then we'll chat."

With Dorcas' reading over his shoulder, Edgar quickly scanned the article. It was all a lot of attempts at humour and the bint trying to sound as though she knew more than she probably did, as far as Ed was concerned... that was, until he hit the word Prewett.

"Whoa, whoa, wait a second," Edgar said. "Where'd she get your names? Better yet, how'd she figure out there was a secret society?"

"We've no idea," Fabian said, shrugging. "We just thought we ought to warn the core, since if she knows about us, it's likely she could figure out about you lot."

"Well fuck me sideways," Dor said softly, curling up more tightly against Edgar. "So maybe you lot ought to just boot me out of the inner circle. I think I'm bad luck or something."

"Unless she's stalking you, I don't think you're the issue, Princess," Edgar said thoughtlessly, and then looked at Dorcas wide-eyed. He'd used the nickname reserved for them and them only, and hoped that Dorcas wouldn't hit him for it.

"Princess?" Fabian asked, lips pursed in a failed attempt to hold in a grin.

"Shut the fuck up, Prewett," Dorcas said and turned her face to bite Ed's neck. "And you're a jerk, Bonesie."

Edgar flinched but couldn't help but smile at Dorcas. "Sorry hon. Slipped out."

"Princess? Really?" Fabian pressed, grinning openly now.

Dorcas leaned up on one elbow to throw a pillow at Fabian, not even caring if she flashed him in the process. "You aren't allowed to call me that. Only Ed is allowed to call me that, and only because he is great in the sack. Now can we please get fucking on fucking topic? Hello, you've been outed, Prewett. What does that mean?"

"Means it only gets worse from here, I imagine," Edgar said. "Providing this Skeeter woman has anything else on the Order."

"Hey, hey, I have an idea," Dorcas said, sitting up and taking the blanket with her to cover her chest, pulling it dangerously low on Edgar's torso in the process. She snapped her fingers loudly to make sure she had the attention of both the boys. "She might not know me, seeing as how I'm so new and all. I could like, fucking, infiltrate."

Edgar quirked an eyebrow. "Like, infiltrate how, exactly? Find out what she knows and then smack her around a bit?"

"Sure, whatever," Dorcas said brightly. "Anything. I could fucking go all Charlie's Angels on her ass. Except I'd be fucking hot and not, you know, lame."

Snorting, Edgar said, "Flip your hair out and everything? Leather pants?"

"I said hot," Dor snorted. "So that means no to the hair, and yes to the pants. You'd like me in leather, wouldn't you, Bonesie?"

"Maybe," Edgar said with a grin and a shrug. "I like you better in nothing, though."

"But you've never even _seen_ me in leather. What if I got one of those fucking suit things, you know? The crazy ones with all the straps?"

"Hello children," Fabian interrupted. "I realize you are only just discovering all the wonderful possibilities there are to sex, and I'll gladly leave you to it. Before I go, though, I'd like to inform you that I'll talk to Gid about your willingness to help, Meadows. We'll get back to you on that. So. Anything else?"

Edgar handed the magazine back to Fabian, "Ah, well. That about covers it, I suppose."

"Great. I'll let you get back to your _movie_ , then. Though honestly, you really ought to do this somewhere with a lock. Your poor mother," Fabian said, rolling his eyes. "Speaking of, she's got a cookie waiting for me. I'll be in touch."

***

Gideon was back in his own yard, although he wasn't quite done yet. He supposed it would've made sense to speak with Emmeline first, considering she lived next door, but Gideon had put her last for a reason. He liked to talk to her. She was quiet and wise and frank. Hopping the chipped white picket fence that separated their properties, Gideon spotted her in the very back of the backyard, camera in hand.

Noticing Gideon in her peripheral vision, Emmeline snapped three more shots of the anthill before turning around to face him, an intense and exuberant expression on her face. She was in a good mood because she'd just that morning gone in and purchased the brand new long distance, high definition, 100x zoom lens she'd been saving for for ages and ages. It had cost her a pretty penny and it would take quite a bit of practice to get used to (which was why she was sitting on her picnic table and shooting an ant hill that was on the other side of the lawn), but it was so worth it.

She could even use it for the Order. It was as good as a pair of binoculars, but with it, she could document her findings. It would be _really_ helpful.

"With this new lens, I feel like I could do a close up of the moon were it full enough," she commented, holding up a camera dwarfed with an enormous zoom lens. "It's amazing. What brings you over the fence?"

"Not the best of news," Gideon said, and handed her the magazine as soon as he reached her. "Just have a read."

Setting the camera gently on the table next to her (it was too heavy to rest comfortably on the strap around her neck), Emmeline read the article carefully, beginning to end. As soon as she was done, she turned back to face Gideon with a nod.

"So it's begun in earnest then," she said softly. "I was wondering how long it would take."

"Everyone else reacted with 'what the fucks'," Gideon said. "I even spit my coffee across the breakfast table. But... you expected something like this?"

"Eventually," Emmeline said, shrugging. "We've been pissing him off for years, and breaking the law doing it. It's natural progression for him to attempt to do the same, isn't it? Assuming Rita Skeeter is right, of course, and I think she is. And as for the press, well. Did you really expect the Order to stay secret forever?"

Gideon laughed a little. "Stupidly assumed so, perhaps," he said. "But in the back of our minds... well. It was inevitable." Looking down at the magazine, Gideon noticed something he'd never seen before. "Emmeline? Is that... what's that?" he asked, and pointed at her left hand.

Emmeline smiled and held her hand out to Gideon, fingering her new ring and blushing faintly. "Leroy gave it to me yesterday."

"Oh well," Gideon said quietly. "Didn't know the old boy had it in him."

"A lot of people underestimate the quiet ones," Emmeline said, grinning playfully up at Gideon. Emmeline was quiet too, and people often mistook that for stupidity or spinelessness. Gideon had seen for himself how wrong assumptions like that were, though, and she felt comfortable joking about it with him. "My father hasn't noticed yet. I expect he'll be angry."

"I'd imagine so," Gideon said. "Too young, right? The general Dad stuff?" He didn't want to mention Emmeline's mum, figuring it'd be a touchy subject. He was sure that Emmeline's father would find it hard to let go of her, with her being all he had left.

Emmeline nodded. "He'll get over it though. At least he likes Leroy, and he's glad I'm not a lesbian. Anyway, I've told Leroy we're going to wait a few years to actually get married."

"Probably the best thing," Gideon said. "You've got the rest of your lives anyway."

"You're speaking to your shoes," Emmeline said bluntly. Then, in a tone that had no room for uncertainty, she asked, "What's wrong?"

Gideon looked up and took a deep breath. He was jealous, jealous, _jealous_ , that's what was wrong. He was practically fucking knocking on 30, and here was Emmeline in all her 18-year-old glory with a ring on her finger. It was that simple, wasn't it? Shouldn't it always be that simple? Guy loves girl, girl loves guy, guy proposes, girl says yes, the two get married and live happily ever after?

"Ah. Well. Just a long day, I suppose," Gideon said instead.

"You're lying," she said. "But it's all right. You don't have to tell me. Is there anything I can do?"

Running a hand through his hair, Gideon said, "You know what? I just don't talk about it. Isn't that ridiculous? My mother would say that it's just like a man... then again I suppose she'd slap it out of me if she wanted to know bad enough." He shook his head. "I'm jealous. I'm jealous of the ring on your finger, and of the fact that Marlene wouldn't take mine so easily." There. He was getting better at just spitting it out.

"I thought it might be something like that," Emmeline said with a soft smile. Not many people knew anything about what had happened between Gideon and Marlene. And while no one had told Emmeline about it and she certainly didn't know any of the details, she had an inkling. It wasn't hard to figure out what they felt for each other, not if someone were to just pay attention. She'd had no idea Gideon had proposed, though.

At a bit of a loss for words, Emmeline quoted a song by Utopia. "'And when you feel afraid, love one another. When you've lost your way, love one another. When you're all alone, love one another. When you're far from home, love one another. When you're down and out, love one another. When all your hope's run out, love one another. When you need a friend, love one another. When you're near the end, love one another. We've got to love one another.' That's all you can do, really. The rest is out of your control."

"But sometimes all you can do seems pretty pointless," Gideon said. "And I used to be optimistic, way back when. I've made more mistakes than I'm willing to remember, and it feels like, some days anyhow, she's one of them."

Shrugging, Emmeline just looked up at him and smiled sadly. "Whatever your regrets might be, Gideon, they're in the past. All you have is today and tomorrow. That's all you control and all you experience and all you _live_. The rest is just memories."

It was as if someone had turned on Gideon's brain.

"You're... you're right," he said distractedly, and licked his lips. He ran his hand through his hair again and realized that he'd become such a mess since the wedding that he hardly knew up from down anymore. "Fuck, what have I even been doing for the last two months?" he asked out loud, but already knew the answer: wallowing in self-pity. Hoping that maybe, if he was miserable enough, God might take pity too and fix Gideon's shit-tastic life.

He was sure that he'd always love Marlene. There was no way he could _forget_ her, the idea was laughable. But he had to... he just, well he had to move on with his life.

"You must think I'm a crazy person," he said to Emmeline.

"Of course not. You're just human like the rest of us," Emmeline answered, picking up her camera and pointing it at his face. She focussed and smiled from behind it. "Human indeed. I can see your pores."

Gideon touched his nose. "I'm sure they look disgusting. I haven't exactly been taking care of myself the way I normally do lately."

"Well, as incentive to pick yourself back up," Emmeline started, pausing to click a few frames, "we can do before and after photos."

Gideon laughed. "I'll stick the before ones on the mirror in the loo. At least it'll keep me washing my face every morning."

"I'll get it to you as soon as I print this roll," she told him with a nod, lowering the camera again. "Hestia is worried about you, by the way. We talked about you the other day."

"Oh, really?" Gideon questioned. "I imagine there weren't many positive things discussed, seeing as I've been a big wank to her lately."

Emmeline tucked some hair behind her ear and nodded in agreement. "Yeah, you have. But you know, for some reason she really likes you anyway. Funny that." Emmeline paused and then leaned forward, saying seriously, "She may not be perfect, but neither are you and you two might be good for each other. She's willing to let you in, you know."

"Since when do you play matchmaker?" Gideon asked, smiling slightly.

"Since two people I care about happen to be in about the same situation," Emmeline said, raising her eyebrows. "Have you even bothered to ask Hestia about herself?"

"No," Gideon answered honestly. "I've been too busy feeling sorry for myself. She calls a lot though, and just... lets me talk. But I suppose I'm a bit too preoccupied with myself?"

"I'll say," Emmeline said, but grinned to soften her words a little. She wasn't trying to be mean, but Emmeline respected Gideon too much to lie to him about anything, and she was fairly sure he knew that. "Give her a call next time, and let _her_ talk. You might be surprised at what you hear."

Gideon smiled. "I'm sure you're right," he said. "And I'll try harder."

"If Fabian starts to coddle you too much, you can hop over the fence any time. You know I'll be here, even if I'm not," Emmeline said warmly.

"I just might take you up on that," Gideon said. "And speaking of Fabian, I'm supposed to meet him in a mo'. I'll see you later."

Nodding, Emmeline picked up her camera again and called over her shoulder as he began to walk away, "Oh, and I'll need someone from the Order to come with me sometime soon once I get the hang of this lens. I want to see what I can see up at his warehouse and get some pictures for everyone else. You up for it?"

"You know I am," Gideon called back, and hopped the fence.

"Can't wait."

***

"Marlene is likely never going to speak to me again, Remus wasn't there but Sirius kindly put pants on for the news, and Dorcas and Edgar had just had sex so the conversation quickly degenerated into her offering to dress as a dominatrix. Though she also offered to _infiltrate_ Rita Skeeter for us, whatever that means," Fabian said in lieu of a greeting, hopping over the back of the couch to plop down next to his brother. He dropped a bag into Gid's lap and quipped, "I brought fudge, as promised. How'd it go for you?"

"Harry was screaming at the Potters', so I don't recall much of that conversation, though I do have a headache. Alice and Frank are out, at least for now, and I don't really blame them because it's getting ridiculously serious. Emmeline wasn't surprised at all," Gideon replied. "And two questions. One, why is Marlene never going to speak to you again, and two, Dorcas wants to what?"

"Oh, well, I got a bit shirty with her, didn't I?" Fabian said airily. "She just wouldn't see sense and we got in a bit of a row. Not about the article, though. She was just sort of surprised and curious about that. I didn't really get into it with her, to be honest. And Dorcas figures since she's so new to the core and the Order, she probably has the best shot of not being recognised. She offered to get to know Rita, and also kick her arse, if necessary. Though I must say the latter is a bad idea. You already know what I think of violence, but beyond that, she's too spunky and too little. Don't want her getting hurt. And what do you mean the Longbottoms are out? Completely out? Dropping the Order?"

"Yea, for now anyhow," Gideon said, scratching his chin. "They're just worried. Neville's their priority. And yeah, I dunno about Dor chumming up to Skeeter. I trust her, but she can bounce off the walls sometimes, and it wouldn't shock me in the slightest if she couldn't manage to keep her cool and just decked Skeeter." Gideon opened the bag in his lap and took out a piece of fudge, deciding then not to ask what Fabian and Marlene had argued about. Not that it wasn't obvious. He took a bite of the fudge. "So what next, little brother?" he asked thickly.

"Honestly? I haven't a clue. Maybe we ought to take this as an opportunity and recruit," Fabian said. "And why wasn't Emmeline surprised?"

"Said it was sort of inevitable really," Gideon answered after swallowing. "And she's right, you know. We couldn't have stayed a secret forever." Gideon paused, looking at his brother thoughtfully. "Now, recruiting... we could just, keeping going the way we are, consequences be damned, or. We could play this to our advantage to make the core stronger."

"Interesting bird, that Emmeline," Fay said. He'd eaten loads of fudge on his way home, so he didn't particularly want anymore. Good thing Gideon seemed to be enjoying it. He might have gone a bit overboard, though Molly would surely like some. "And go on and explain then. How do you mean?"

"More people," Gideon said. "Like you were saying. Only... not just punk kids and the like. We need... _people_. Does that make sense? Adults."

"Good point. There are enough punk kids involved," Fabian said. "We could use the credibility, if we're being put up against Riddle's Death Eaters, or what have you. Maybe we should call a general meeting to canvass for some possible names."

"Sounds like a plan," Gideon agreed. "We need to make the best of this, and show Riddle that we're not afraid of him, providing of course he has developed some group of thugs to take us down."

"Even if he hasn't, the press means we've got to be ready for people to find out about us for real, and we've got to be legit when they do," Fabian said. "And the Death Eaters? Well. Whether or not they're specifically to take us down doesn't really matter, does it? It's still the start of something new and intense and serious. It still means _war_."


	2. We Got the Beat (September 8th, 2006)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Where the Hobbled Gordons finally get thier big break, Emmeline is meanwhile hit on by the pervy old man who's signing them, and Gideon and Hestia accept that although nothing's perfect, some things are still worthwhile.

Barty Crouch didn't like dingy clubs.

He also didn't like small towns.

The fact that the agency had sent him to Hicksville for the sake of hearing a group of hillbillies strum on their banjos was enough to drive him off the deep end. Scruff-necked yokels with no sense of common decency (no doubt) bouncing about the place half-naked and yodelling.

Well, on that note, perhaps he was assuming rather much. If it weren't for the horrid drive in, and the herd of cattle in the middle of the highway, Barty _might have_ been in a better mood. The events of the day had made his nerves testy, and these "Hobbled Gordons" had quite a lot to prove tonight if they wanted to get into Barty's good books. They'd said, "Barty, if you think they're bloody good, sign them on the spot and haul their arses to London on the next train. If they're absolutely rubbish, say fuck it and tell them so. In either case, you've still got to go hear them."

Barty rather hoped for the latter, if for no other reason to vent his anger.

The club was packed from the entrance to the stage, and he found himself squeezing amongst the large-chested women in the back (20-somethings wearing what one could hardly call clothing, the minxes) to the bar where he ordered a scotch and was sure to ask for a clean glass.

Aside from _that_ pompous fellow, the one who'd asked for a _clean glass_ just as Marlene had approached the bar, Marlene felt like she knew every single person in the club. All of her friends had turned up (though she had yet to see Gideon, not that she was looking), and there was a line up outside of people waiting to get in too. Apparently if they let anyone else in, the fire department would shut the club down for the night as a safety hazard.

"Rosie, love, you look a little harried!" Marlene shouted, smiling as she leaned over the bar. Rosie, who'd been fired a week or so ago from the public pool Marlene worked at for sleeping with some bloke in the steam room, had just started at The Three Drumsticks a few days ago. The job suited the outgoing girl much better, but she looked a little overwhelmed.

"It's only my third shift, and I just dropped a full bottle of tequila! I'd better make enough tips tonight to pay for it!" Rosie said, laughing. "What can I get you, Marly?"

"Two beers. Me and Em are thirsty and all there is in the back is bottled water."

Rosie nodded and grinned as she shouted back, "Coming right up, VIP!"

Marlene left Rosie with a tip and a smile as she headed back to the space behind the stage for band members and guests only, beer in hand.

Walking in, she called, "Hey Emmeline, get this. Some bloke in a suit asked for a... oh. Hello."

"Hello," Barty said, raising his eyebrows. "Can I help you?"

"Ah, no," Marlene said, quickly putting two and two together. She'd never seen him before, he was wearing a suit, and he obviously thought this place was beneath him. He must be the A&R guy. "I'm Marlene McKinnon, Stubby's girlfriend. I'd shake your hand, only both mine are currently full."

Emmeline reached forward and took one of the mugs (hiding a smile in her beer when Marlene didn't reach out to shake his hand after all), saying after she swallowed, "Thanks, Marlene. And I'm Emmeline Vance. Leroy's fiancé. You must be from The Ministry. We'd heard you might be coming by tonight."

"I'm Bartemius Crouch. I've heard _interesting_ things about the Hobbled Gordons," Barty said. "I hope they're intending to put on a worthwhile show tonight."

"They always do. They're becoming quite the local favourite," Emmeline said calmly, sitting down on the arm of the nearby couch so she wouldn't be too far out of the conversation.

"Are you going to listen from back here, or out in the main room?" Marlene asked.

It was less crowded back here, but one of the most memorable things about the Hobbled Gordons was their stage antics. Or, well, Stubby's, anyway. She didn't know about the two new fellows, and Leroy certainly didn't join in. But Stubby knew how to work a crowd, that was for sure.

"Here," Barty answered Marlene, stiffly. "I'd prefer to keep my suit clean." Turning to Emmeline he asked with a smile, "Do they have a manager? Might _you_ be their manager?" 

"No, I'm not," Emmeline said politely. "Actually, they do it on their own. They can't really afford a manager."

Marlene rolled her eyes. Emmeline had already said she was Leroy's wife-to-be, and still that man had the gall to smile like he was picturing her naked? Dick. Marlene didn't want to run off at the mouth and burn any bridges, though, so she gave Emmeline a meaningful sort of look and said, "I'm going to go watch the show. My handy is on vibrate, though. Text if you need anything."

"Sure," Emmeline said. Marlene didn't have to worry, though. Emmeline could take care of herself. "Have fun."

Barty was quite happy to see the loud-mouthed groupie go, and took another drink from his glass before commenting, "Money or not, they really ought to consider--for their own viability--taking on a manager. The Ministry isn't in the habit of appointing them. We make the assumption that bands are responsible enough to take care of that aspect themselves."

"I'm sure they'll take any suggestions from a record company into due consideration," Emmeline replied. "I'm not sure if they'll come back here after warming up or just start right into their first set, but I've no doubt they'll be really excited to talk to you as soon as they get a moment."

"You should consider taking on the position for them," Barty suggested with a wink. "I wouldn't mind dealing with the band through you."

"Shame I don't know anything about management," Emmeline said. "I may do their photos though."

"Shame indeed. But photos, hmm?" Barty mused. "What _sorts_ of photos do you specialize in?"

Emmeline hated talking about her art when it wasn't there for her to show. It defeated the whole purpose, in her opinion. "Art is to be seen, not talked about. And I promise, that is unintentional pretension."

Barty was slightly disappointed. He'd hoped she'd done nudies, perhaps... perhaps even ones of herself. "Ah well. Now, when are they due to start? I'm afraid I haven't got all evening."

***

Once, while they were holed up in Stubby's room, he'd played Marlene a slow, lovely acoustic version of _Kiss and Listen_ , and ever since then it had been Marlene's favourite song. Sure, the stage version was no ballad, but it always reminded her of that lovely day. So, when they started into the opening chords, Marlene had abandoned her drink and the conversation she was having with Caradoc about how late Fabian was and flung herself onto the dance floor.

She closed her eyes and danced wildly, quickly starting to sweat in the poorly ventilated building. There was simply too much body heat. Marlene decided she didn't care if she got all shiny and red-faced, though, and just pushed damp hair away from her face and continued twirling.

Just as they entered the second chorus, someone bumped hard into Marlene, and she opened her eyes, intending to glare. Before she even figured out who'd run into her, though, she spotted Gideon dancing. With a girl. His _hands_ were on her _arse_. Marlene wanted to throw her across the room by her stupid, tiny shirt.

Gideon grinned. Hestia really was something else.

His hair was stuck to his face, and there was a permanent, broad smile stretched across it too. He'd taken Emmeline's advice and called Hestia and listened to Hestia, and realized that Emmeline was more than right. They were good for each other. Their past relationships had been so fucked up that this was exactly what the both of them needed. A fresh start with someone who knew what it was like, and who knew what the other had been through.

Gideon squeezed Hestia's arse tighter and she returned his smile. "I'm glad you convinced me to come here," he called over the music.

"I told you you'd have fun!" Hestia called back. Her smile went sly then and she licked her lips. "Maybe later we can have a different sort of fun!"

The music stopped in the middle of Hestia's last sentence, and the crowd looked at the both of them. Hestia smiled sheepishly, and Gideon laughed, looking around.

He spotted Marlene.

Marlene was glad she was already flushed from the heat and that dancing; else she wasn't sure exactly how she'd explain the angry red of her cheeks. She swallowed hard and tried to remind herself that Gideon could fuck whoever he wanted, even if this particular one was obviously nothing but a little tramp fresh out of high school.

Everyone in Salcombe knew everyone else, so it wasn't odd that Marlene had known Hestia for ages. Since they were just kids and Hestia tried to play football with the big kids. More recently, of course, Hestia had joined the Order and then gotten herself arrested on her very first mission and dropped out. She was obviously a flake. Not that it mattered. It was Gideon's choice, and it had nothing to do with Marlene anymore.

Forcing a smile as the band finally launched into their last song of the first set, Marlene moved closer and called, trying to sound natural, "Glad you made it, Gideon. I wasn't sure you'd come."

For some reason, Marlene was making Gideon feel tense.

"Well. I told Hestia about it and she thought it'd be fun, so..." Gideon shrugged. "They're playing really well tonight."

"Yeah," Marlene agreed, and then added, "That was my song, you know. He plays that for me." Well, he had. Once.

Hestia, fairly certain that Marlene was absorbed by Gideon's presence, raised both of her eyebrows. She understood that Marlene and Gideon had a long, _long_ history. But Marlene couldn't keep Gideon on a string anymore. He'd been losing his mind until Emmeline had stepped in and knocked some sense into him, and made him realize that he couldn't waste his life on a girl who claimed not to want him anymore.

Now here was Marlene trying to make Gideon jealous. Hestia had no choice. For Gideon's sake she had to intervene.

"It was very nice, very catchy," she said, before Gideon could answer. She smiled at the both of them. "It's a great dance song. Do they have more like that?"

"Of course. Loads," Marlene replied after a moment. She suddenly felt a little sick to her stomach. She must've had more to drink than she'd thought. Changing the subject completely, Marlene commented, "There's a guy from The Ministry label hitting on Emmeline in the back. I'll probably go back after the first set and see what he thinks. Could mean big things for the Hobbled Gordons."

"Well that's what they've been hoping for since we were 15 and they started the thing," Gideon said, smiling and remembering the day in 10th grade when Leroy and Stubby had announced their plans to rule the world with their rock band. "The drummer and keyboardist are new though. Didn't we go to school with them?"

"Yeah. I think they're both a bit younger than us though," Marlene answered. It felt weird to be having a normal conversation with Gideon. Or, well. Mostly normal. She hadn't really realized she'd gotten used to the way things were until they changed again. He seemed happier, though. So that was good. Even if it made the sick feeling in Marlene's stomach worse. "So Hestia. I haven't seen you in a while. How are you?"

"I'm good," Hestia answered, slightly on guard. "Just trying to, you know. Figure out what I'm doing, I guess."

"Well, you have time. You're still a kid," Marlene said, almost too soft to be heard over the music. She felt a bit light-headed. "You have your whole life ahead of you to do whatever you want."

"Marlene," Gideon said (he hadn't been able to bring himself to call her Kinny for the last little while); "You know... we're not exactly that old."

"No, I mean, obviously not," Marlene said, forcing another smile and shaking her head as though to say ' _Us, old? Ha, never._ ' "I just meant... you know. Enjoy yourself while you can. It was just friendly advice. Or something."

Hestia frowned. "What's it all downhill from 25?"

Looking up at Gideon for a moment and then into Hestia's eyes, Marlene thought about how her life would be from here on and smiled sadly. Shoving her hands into her pockets, she tried to joke. "Something like that. Honestly, I'm already getting wrinkles. But my boyfriend'll be a rock star soon. Live fast, die pretty, isn't that what they say?"

Hestia... was really at a loss for words. How on earth did you react to a statement like that?

Gideon glanced at Hestia, and then back at Marlene. "Well," he said, searching for something, _anything_ that might lighten the awkwardness between the three of them. "I think that's kind of... depressing," he said honestly, and then laughed. "Do you really want to do the party hard, drug overdose sort of thing? I mean... you remember what happened that time with me, right? When I broke my legs?"

Of course Marlene did. She'd been a total wreck about it. As soon as he'd gotten out of the hospital, she'd shouted at him and hit him and then kissed him and told him if he ever did something so colossally stupid again, she'd stop speaking to him forever after pulling out all his nose hairs with her mother's eyebrow tweezers. It had been terrifying.

"Yeah, I remember. Learn to take a joke, losers," Marlene said, rolling her eyes. "Hey, are you two going to the after party? It's up at Ben's place, I think. His parents are loaded and they've got a huge house. There's a hot tub and everything. I think I'm going to skip it, but I could give you directions if you wanted."

"Nah, I think we're just going to head out after the second set," Gideon said, and Hestia nodded. "Hestia and I are taking Billy and Charlie to the zoo tomorrow morning."

"You are," she deadpanned. She knew exactly how Gideon was about family. That was test number one for Hestia. Suddenly light-headedness turned into dizziness and Marlene took a deep breath. "Meeting the nephews already, huh? Be real nice, and offer to buy them ice cream or something. If you don't get the thumbs up from them, it's a big, red buzzer. No joke. Look, I have to go. I don't feel... I mean, I've had too much to... I should just go. They'll be back there before I get through the crowd anyway, you know, and I don't want to miss anything. It was nice talking to you." At that, Marlene began to back away. Just to make sure neither had the chance to stop her, she added, "If you've brought Fabian with you, Caradoc was by the bar looking for him a few songs ago."

Marlene retreated and Gideon and Hestia stood dumb-founded for moment watching her wrestle through the crowd. Hestia looked at Gideon half-amused, half-confused, and said, "So... am I being tested then?"

Gideon snorted. "I guess Marlene blew my cover. But yeah. They're not hard to please, though. It's Molly you really have to worry about."

Hestia shook her head. "Marlene is something. Seems like she's changed a lot."

Gideon nodded distractedly. "Yea..." he said, trailing off after a second. He swallowed. He had to put Marlene out of his mind, and focus on Hestia, who was just... who _had_ to be more important right now. "Anyhow. Want a drink before the next set?"

***

Stubby stared at the outstretched hand for a moment, Barty's last words ringing in his head. ' _Be in London by Tuesday. As of now, you have an appointment with me at one to discuss your recording contract._ ' Stubby blinked blankly at him once more, and then whooped loudly and threw himself at Barty, picking the bloke right up and swinging him around. After a moment, he dumped the man unceremoniously (Barty promptly brushed the wrinkles out of his suit and muttered something about how disgusting sweat was before walking promptly out the door) and turned to Leroy.

"Fuck! Yeah! Fuck yeah!" he shouted, grabbing Leroy's face between his hands and roaring.

Marlene shared a smile with Emmeline as the two of them watched their respective boyfriends. Marlene still couldn't get over how different Stubby and Leroy were.

Leroy was grinning from ear to ear. He might not have been as vocal as Stubby, but he was still pleased as fuck and just _couldn't believe that they'd gotten a recording contract_. Dale Diggle (whose real name was 'Dedalus' of all things. What sort of mother called their kid Dedalus?), their keyboardist, slapped him on the back and said, "You fucking did him in with that baseline in the second set, Roy. Fucking did. Him. In."

Leroy shook his head bashful and felt the colour rise in his cheeks. He'd been on the top of his game tonight, sure, but it was _everyone's_ effort that had gotten them here.

Ben was bouncing on the balls of his feet, grinning from ear to ear and saying, "Shit, shit, holy fucking shit," under his breath. After a moment, he just threw his head back and shouted, "We _fucking rock_! Those guys _never_ stay for a whole show!"

He climbed up onto the couch and pumped his hands into the air as he jumped off, stabbing one of his drumsticks into the soft plasterboard ceiling, crashing to the ground in an uncoordinated heap. He just rolled onto his back on the floor and stared up at it. "That, mates, is for fucking posterity. No one touch it."

"I don't know how someone with so much rhythm can be such a giant klutz, Ben," Emmeline said, smiling ruefully and helping him to his feet.

Emmeline's comment suddenly reminded Leroy that, while recording contracts were fantastic as fuck, there were still other, more important things. He grinned his quirky, lopsided grin at Emmeline and reached out for her, pulling her into his embrace and bending to kiss her softly.

Emmeline wrapped her arms around Leroy's neck and smiled against his mouth. She really was happy for them. "Congratulations. You were amazing," she whispered against his lips as their kiss ended.

" _We_ were amazing," Stubby corrected, and pulled Marlene against him, grabbing her arse with both hands and snogging her.

Sliding a leg in between Stubby's, Marlene gave as good as she got. She didn't mind the PDA so long as she didn't look like a tart or a pushover. She was no wimpy girly girl, after all.

"We're going to go on tour, babe," Stubby said, breaking the kiss. "Fuck, we'll be on the road for months, playing every night, seeing the country. For now. The whole bloody world, eventually. How soon do you think it'll be, guys? I bet just after the New Year. Spring, maybe. Once we've had time to record our songs and get a record out."

Stubby was rambling excitedly now, but one word stuck out in Marlene's head. "Uh, we? You mean, you and the band, right? Not you and I?"

"Me and the band and you," Stubby answered. "Of course you're coming with us. You're my girlfriend."

"I can't," she said quickly, mind reeling. Sure, it was a long ways away, but as stupid as it was, she just couldn't imagine leaving Gideon. And the Order. There was so much going on right then with the Order and the spy and everything, and she couldn't _leave_. "I have obligations. Responsibilities. I can't just leave."

Leroy looked at Emmeline quizzically. 

Emmeline shook her head a little, giving Leroy a look that said _loooong story_.

"Are you fucking kidding me?" Stubby asked, taking a step away from Marlene.

Marlene offered a weak smile. "Sorry, I didn't mean to... Look, why don't we talk about this later?"

"Later is good!" Ben interrupted, looping one arm around Stubby's shoulders and the other around Marlene's. "Tonight, we celebrate. Because we are _fucking_ going to get _signed_. So. My house? It's just house music now that we're done, and I can play that shit at my place. I'll even steal some of the good champagne and we can get fucking wasted in the hot tub. What do you say, Gnarly Marly?"

"Where did you hear that? Have you been talking to Rosie?" Marlene retorted, glad for the distraction. "Seriously. No one calls me that."

"Ben and Rosie do," Em pointed out. Then, to Leroy, "Meet you at the car? Bathroom stop."

***

Hestia flushed and left the stall, heading for the sink. She stuck a hand under the soap dispenser and pushed, the generic smelling liquid spilling onto her hand. She turned on the faucet, humming to herself and smiling.

Emmeline opened the door to the bathroom and smiled immediately. "You're looking happy. Good night?"

Hestia looked up as she washed her hands and nodded. "Gideon paid more attention to me tonight that he has to anything in his entire life, I'm pretty sure."

"Fantastic. Marlene doesn't seem to have fared so well," Emmeline said sadly. Hestia and Gideon both seemed happier now that they were together, but Marlene seemed to have gone a little downhill. When exactly Emmeline had developed a Fixing People Thing, she didn't know, but it was there. Trying to shake off her worries and be happy for her best friend, though, Emmeline grinned and teased, "What is it about Gideon Prewett that makes all the girls so crazy?"

Hestia shrugged and reached for the paper towel. "You've got me. I certainly don't have any sensible reasons." She dried her hands grabbed a fresh piece to turn off the faucet. "And Marlene spoke to us earlier. She was... well. To put it lightly would be to say she was interesting."

"Oh dear," Emmeline said. She wished she were a little closer with Marlene so she could have a real talk with her. Well, nothing she could do about it at just this second. Turning her back to the mirror, Emmeline covered her mouth with her fingers excitedly. "Anyway. I have good news. Bet you can guess."

"They didn't get signed?" Hestia asked, awed.

Emmeline nodded vigorously. "They've got to be in London by Tuesday afternoon. Apparently they want to start right away."

"Wow," Hestia said. "Bet they're excited as fuck, eh?"

"Of course. Wouldn't you be?" Emmeline said. "You and Gideon are probably heading out rather than coming up to Ben's, aren't you?"

Hestia laughed. "Yea. He's testing me out with the oldest munchkins in the morning," she said. "And I need my beauty rest. And in the meantime I just might try and seduce him."

"You'll do wonderfully, I know it. And come on then. I want to tell him the good news too. I don't feel like waiting in line to use the loo anyway," Emmeline said, smiling at the three girls leaning back against the wall before stepping out the door and holding it open for Hestia.

Hestia headed to where she'd left Gideon, chatting with Fabian and Caradoc. "Hey, love," she said, looping her arm with his. "Emmeline's got some news."

Gideon smiled. "Oh yea? What's that?"

"Starts with 'record' and ends with 'contract'. Guess," Emmeline ordered with a smile.

"Are you serious?" Fay asked.

"Of course she's fucking serious," Hestia answered with a grin. "They're overdosing fucking rock stars now. The whole nine yards."

"Wow. That's just... wow!" Fabian said, and then grinned. "Cara, I _love_ this song. Come dance with me. And tell them congrats from me, will you, Emmeline? Thanks!"

Emmeline snorted as Fabian pulled Caradoc onto the dance floor without giving anyone a chance to respond.

Gideon shook his head at his brother. "I swear, his hips control him more than his cock does," he said.

"You're just jealous," Hestia teased, "because you can't cut a rug as well as your baby brother."

"Fabian can't lie, though, so Gideon has the better talent if he wants to be an actor," Emmeline said casually.

Gideon snorted. "I suppose so. I'll just wow the crowds with my impressive ability to bullshit," he said. "Speaking of crowds, I suppose you're going to the after party, eh Em?

"Of course," Emmeline answered. Angling a look in Hestia's direction, she added slyly, "Though I don't expect we'll stay long. Leroy's not a big partier, and we'd both probably prefer to celebrate on our own."

Hestia elbowed Emmeline. "Told you it was addictive, didn't I?"

"Wait, what?" Gideon asked. "Back it up a second. Are you talking about what I think you're talking about? What happened to waiting until you're married?"

Em looked up at Gideon and shrugged. She wasn't embarrassed at all that she hadn't waited until marriage--she'd made the choice and she'd deal with the consequences, after all. "Well. I got engaged."

"That's still not married. What if you two end up breaking it off before you even get into the nitty gritty details?" Gideon just shook his head, but a smile was tugging at his lips.

Hestia swatted him playfully. "Oh shut up. Engagement is close enough."

"Thank you, Hestia," Emmeline said, and gave Gideon a _look_. "I just decided I didn't want to spend my honeymoon figuring out what goes where."

"Nah, you got that out of the way the morning after when you called asking for tips," Hestia said, and then waggled her eyebrows.

Gideon glanced over both of his shoulders and then looked at Emmeline perplexed. "When did I receive the invitation into the girly club? Cocks and shagging... should I be taking notes?"

"No. You should be forgetting everything as soon as it occurs. We're both rather fond of you, you see, and we'd hate to have to have you assassinated," Emmeline said dryly. "I really ought to go, though. Leroy's probably asleep by now."

"Yes, yes, giddy up then. I wouldn't want to ruin your night by depriving you of a good shag," Hestia said, bemused. "Besides, Gideon and I have our own celebration to attend to."

Gideon's ears perked at this and he smiled wryly. "Excuse me?"

"Good luck with the seducing. Call me after initiation by nephews tomorrow," Em said to Hestia. Then (rather simply) to Gid: "Goodnight, Gideon."

***

Standing above the rubbish bin and tugging the condom off, Gideon couldn't help but smile to himself.

 _That_... that had been good. No. That had been a _fantastic_ shag. Dropping the thing into the bin, Gideon suddenly realized something that (in the heat of the moment) he hadn't thought to consider.

Hestia was the first bird he'd been with since Marlene that he hadn't pictured as Marlene while shagging. He'd shagged Hestia. He'd wanted to shag Hestia. He'd actually _wanted_ , in a clear mental state, to have a sex with someone who wasn't Marlene McKinnon.

His smile grew a little wider. He owed Emmeline a drink or a roll of film or something for this one.

"Arse back to bed, Gid," Hestia called, stretching languidly. She'd been a bit worried about sleeping with him. Not the mechanics, mind. Hell, she'd been bloody excited for that part. But she'd been sort of worried it wouldn't feel like he was _there_. But he was. He was there the whole time, focussed on her and what they were doing, and so had Hestia. They'd been good together. "It's cold without you."

Gideon crawled back under the covers and wrapped himself around Hestia, kissing her cheek. He just... he wanted to touch her all over, to prove he really cared and that this wasn't just some thing and that he was _trying_ because... they were good for one another. They were broken people who could take care of each other. It hardly constituted as love, Gideon knew that, but since he'd starting talking with Hestia--really talking with her--he'd begun to feel the butterflies in his stomach and a warmth in him that made his heart skip a beat when he looked at her.

And what made it a million times better was that when she looked back, he could see the same feelings in her.

"I could get used to this," he murmured, nuzzling the side of her face.

"Good, because I definitely want to do that over and over again," Hestia replied softly, turning her face and catching his mouth in a kiss. "Best shag _ever_."

Gideon laughed. "You're not kidding," he said, running a hand down the side of her face. "But I just meant holding you. Touching you. Being with you."

"Really?" she asked, smiling broadly at him and curled her own arms around him and looked into his eyes. Maybe it wasn't what they both wanted most, but it made her feel better than she'd felt in ages, and Emmeline always said nothing was ever perfect. For the first time, Hestia began to think that if this was as close as she would come to perfection, that was okay. More than okay. "Because I really like being here with you."

"Then perhaps we ought to make this a regular thing," Gideon suggested, and licked his lips.

"Yes, Gideon Prewett," Hestia said, rolling her eyes. "I would love to be your girlfriend."

"Glad you caught on," Gideon said with a chuckle. This could be a really great thing, he thought, watching her closely. No. This was _going to be_ a really great thing. He could feel it. He could sense that change in himself, trying to move on, and here he was in his bed with a beautiful woman who felt the same way. Not that the beautiful bit was a necessity, but it was certainly a nice touch - her curves were a nice change from Marlene's slightly flatter features. Gideon ran his hand along Hestia's side, over her breast and hips and onto her arse, pulling her tightly into him.

"So. You like what you see?" Hestia asked coyly. "We were rather busy when we first lost the clothes. I didn't get the chance to ask."

"I like, yeah," Gideon whispered, his voice a little husky. He hoped Hestia wasn't too tired, because it looked like his cock was making a reappearance. "How about you? Do you like what you see?"

"Oh hell yeah," Hestia murmured, voice low and breathy against his ear. "I _love_ what I see, and I love it even more when it's in action."

"That can be arranged," Gideon said, and bit his bottom lip. He grabbed her arse tighter. "If you'd like to see me in action again, of course."

"I would," Hestia replied and pressed her hips forward. " _If_ you can keep up with me."

"I think I did well last time," Gideon answered with a sharp breath. "I'm not that old."

"Prove it," she challenged.

Gideon grinned and quirked an eyebrow. "Oh you're asking for it now, Hestia," he said, and brought their lips together hard, kissing her with a passion he hoped was more than obvious.

"You're damn right I am."

***

The party at Benjy's had rather quickly gotten out of hand. Emmeline and Leroy, neither of whom were drinking, only stayed for about an hour before the antics of all the inebriated people got to them. By the time they'd left, Stubby had already passed out on the stairs in clothes wet from being thrown arse first into the hot tub and someone had driven the riding lawnmower into the pool shed.

But even though they knew they had the flat to themselves all night (they figured Stubby probably wouldn't wake up for at least twelve hours), they weren't really taking full advantage of that.

The excitement of the evening had been tiring, and Emmeline was just happy to lay in bed with Leroy and kiss.

Leroy slid a slow hand through Emmeline's hair and pulled back, just touching noses. He looked at her smiling for a moment, and then said, "Ems? Can I ask you something?"

"Always," she replied contentedly. She couldn't believe how happy Leroy made her just by being with her. He didn't even have to do anything at all and she was still smiling all the time.

"Remember how Marlene said she wouldn't go on tour with us? If we went on tour?" Leroy asked in his quiet (although everything he said was quiet, usually, so this wasn't much of a change), worried voice.

"I'll still go," she said, bringing up a hand to run her fingers lightly along his jaw line, smiling. "I wouldn't miss it for the world."

Leroy smiled. He'd hoped and figured that Emmeline would go. She was a far cry from Marlene, who was the sort of bird that Leroy'd never be able to handle. "Why d'you suppose Marlene _really_ doesn't want to go on tour?"

"Not quite sure yet," Emmeline replied. Leroy was observant, just like her. Sure, neither of them was overly talkative, but they talked to each other. Especially about all the things they noticed. "It has something to do with Gideon, no doubt."

Leroy nodded thoughtfully. "I wondered. They've been very strange lately. But I saw Gideon with Hestia though, and you’d mentioned..." he paused. "Are they a _thing_ now?"

"Yeah," Emmeline said, nodding. "And I don't think Marlene reacted well."

"Oh," Leroy answered. "Are you playing matchmaker?"

"With Gideon and Hestia," Em admitted. "A little. But now I'm worried I've just made Marlene miserable."

"Either way--in a situation like that anyhow--someone is bound to not be pleased," Leroy commented. "What would you suggest doing for Marlene then?"

"Don't know," Emmeline sighed, and then pressed a soft kiss to Leroy's lips. "She seemed fine until she ran into them tonight. Maybe it's a case of out of sight, out of mind?"

"That might help her in the short term," Leroy said and scratched his chin. "But she'll still have to deal with it eventually, if they stay together."

"Well, I can't fix her life for her," Emmeline said. "She got herself into the mess and she's the only one who can get herself out. The best I can do is try to help her be happy in the mean time."

Leroy nodded. "Well... why don't you convince her to go on tour then?"

Emmeline smiled at Leroy. "That's a good idea. I think that I'll try. But enough about her. This night is about you. We're supposed to be celebrating your big break."

In all honesty, Leroy was worried about where this would take the Hobbled Gordons. Sure, he was excited. They'd worked hard over the last decade, and it had finally paid off for them. But Leroy also knew Stubby as well as he knew Emmeline, and had been able to read every action and emotion for what it was since they were five. He knew that Stubby saw this as _his_ "big break," not the band's big break, and that ultimately things would probably pan out before they really went anywhere. Stubby wanted fame for himself and even though Leroy was his best friend, he was just a tag-along in Stubby's ultimate goal.

Leroy didn't like to think it, but he was sure that the same thing would happen with Marlene. If Stubby got the chance, he'd leave her behind just like he would the rest of them for his shot at fame. If Marlene didn't go with them, then it was a guarantee.

As for Leroy, well. Regardless of what happened he knew he had Emmeline, and _that_ to him was more important than any stupid recording contract.

"You know it's not that big of a deal," Leroy answered after a quiet moment. "It might not turn out to be anything."

"You're right. It might not," Emmeline said. "It might, of course, but you never know. Whatever happens, we're going to be happy, you and I."

Leroy smiled the smile that only Emmeline could elicit from him, and said softly and sweetly, "We already are."


	3. Love Somebody to Know (September 17th, 2006)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Where Edgar is a romantic, Dorcas puts on a dress, and Joanne Meadows sees a glimpse of the toddler she used to coddle.

"It was so awesome, man. The dude like, chased us all the way across the parking lot and screamed at us as we jumped the Henderson's fence and ran. Fat asshole didn't stand a chance, though," Jason said, finishing his tale of almost getting caught shoplifting with a triumphant laugh.

"Amateurs," Dorcas sneered at him and his buddies, taking a drag off of her cigarette. "I've never been caught. Only fucking _amateurs_ get caught."

"You have _so_ , idiot," Adam said. He was a tall kid with a mop of fuzzy, curly brown hair that Dorcas had known since she was just little. He'd been with her the day she'd gotten the tattoo on her thigh. "In the makeup department that one time, remember? You got banned."

"That was on purpose though!" Dorcas shouted over the laughter of the others. "The old hag at the desk was being a fucking cunt so I knocked a display over and then lit the spray from some hairspray on fire and pointed it at the fire detector. I was grounded for like, twelve fucking _years_ for that one."

"Hey, Dor, the dude in that car is giving you eyes," Jason said, nodding at some guy over her shoulder. "Go make out with a bird, will you?"

"Fuck off, idiots. That's Ed," Dorcas said, blushing a little. She hadn't _exactly_ told them the details of her relationship with Ed just yet.

Edgar unbuckled his seatbelt, smirking to himself. He was dressed neatly in a suit with his hair pulled back, and opened the car door before reaching for the bouquet of roses sitting in the passenger seat. He figured if he was going to surprise her at school, he might as well go all out.

Jason looked at Edgar, then at Dorcas (and the ridiculous smile she was trying to hide) and promptly burst out laughing. "Ooh, Dor, someone brought you _flowers_!"

"Shut up," Dorcas said, and then took a step towards Ed. Throwing a look at them over her shoulder, she said, "Oh, didn't I tell you fuckers? I can't get enough of Ed and his enormous penis. You can all stop fucking salivating over me now and go try and get laid by girls who _aren't_ out of your league."

"You've gone soft, Meadows!" Adam called, but he was smiling and there was no edge to it. They could all be a bunch of assholes, but Adam had always had her back.

"Have not. I could still fucking kick all your asses at Dance Dance Revolution, and you know it," she teased, and then jogged towards Ed, who was standing beside his car. She kissed him in a typically passionate Dorcas fashion, and then leaned back a little. "You brought me fucking _roses_ in your shit bucket of a car? How sickeningly sweet. I thought you were working tonight?"

"I took it off," Edgar replied, handing her the bouquet with a shit-eating grin. "You're going to go home, and put on a dress, and I'm going to take you out to dinner."

"A dress, huh?" she asked with a coy smile, taking the flowers and smelling them absently before looking up at him mischievously through the rosebuds. "If I've got to wear a dress, of all things, then at the very least, I'll not be wearing _any_ underwear. Just to fucking drive you insane with desire. Sound okay to you, Bonesie?"

Edgar nodded. "I can live with that," he said. "We're eating at that fancy French restaurant too. I made reservations."

"Sounds like you've got it all planned out," she said. Her friends began making kissy noises and she rolled her eyes, flicking her cigarette away and kissing Ed once more. "Let's get the fuck out of here and away from those losers."

"That hurts, Dor!" Jason called. "So all those times I tried to get you to sleep with me and you fed me some bullshit line about being a lesbo, you were lying?"

"Oh, give it a rest, Jay!" she shouted, climbing in and shutting the passenger door. Rolling down the window, she called, "You couldn't handle me anyway, fuckhead!"

Edgar got back into the car, looking pleased with himself. "You know," he said, turning the key and starting the ignition, "For some reason, it makes me extremely proud of myself to know that I'm the one who turned you off of birds."

"Don't get too cocky now," she said with a grin. "I don't expect I was ever really a lesbian in the first place. You just had good fucking timing, is all. Really, it had nothing at all to do with you."

"Oh, of course not," Edgar said, pulling into the street and trying not to laugh. "And Kingsley Shacklebolt's sister walking in on me arse-naked in your living room had _nothing_ to do with why the two of you broke up either, right?"

"You catch on quick," she agreed jokingly, leaning over and biting his ear even though he was driving.

Edgar swerved slightly and was glad that the road was empty. "Tease," he said and swallowed.

"You know, this will be our first real date," Dor said softly, her lips brushing his ear as she spoke. "But I bet you already know that. You're the fucking romantic out of the two of us, after all. Roses, Ed. Honestly."

Even as she spoke, she angled a look at the flowers on her lap, fingering one of the petals gently. Not that she'd ever tell him, but she secretly loved them. She'd keep them as long as she could, and as soon as they started to wilt, she planned on hanging them in her closet to dry. It was her first bouquet of roses, after all.

"You're trying to hide your smile, Dor," Edgar answered. "You love them. There's a romantic girl in there somewhere. And of course I know it's our first real date," he added. "And--since we're talking about how much of a sap I am and all--it's been three months to the day since we first slept together."

"Fuck. Gag me, Bonesie. Maybe I am still a lesbian after all, you great big _girl_ ," she said with a laugh. Just because he was right didn't mean she had to admit it. He knew it anyway; there was no reason for her to say it. "What does French food taste like? Will I like it?"

Edgar shrugged. "Beats me. The only French food I've had is what I ate when I was five during a family vacation to Paris. So this is a new experience for both of us..." he swallowed. "I kind of thought that was appropriate, you know?"

"Yep, definitely still a lesbian," she teased, snickering. She sort of liked his sappiness, though, just like she liked most things about him. Most boys weren't honest about stuff like that. They were too busy being macho.

Edgar was quiet as he pulled into her driveway and stopped the car. After a moment he looked at her and asked, "How come you're never just _honest_ about what you really mean, Dor? I mean, it's always this, dancing around the _real_ answer stuff, you know? And giving me silly little answers like that when I say something meant to be serious."

"I was just fucking _joking_ ," she said, blinking at him and feeling a little defensive. She knew exactly what he was referring to, of course, but she wasn't exactly good at the whole baring-her-soul thing, however much she cared about Ed. So, she changed the subject. "So, what sort of dress do you want me to wear? All of mine are pretty fucking wild, so if you want classy or something, I might have to raid my mother's closet or something. God forbid."

Edgar sighed. "Whatever you like, Dorcas," he said. "The reservation is for 5:30, so you've only got 15 minutes before we have to leave."

"Hey, Ed," she said, frowning. She didn't like this. She actually felt _guilty_ , and she never felt guilty about anything. Plus, she hadn't hardly even done anything wrong. She'd just done what she always did. "What do you want me to say? You want me to tell you every single little thing that I think? You know how I feel about you, Ed. I don't have to fucking tell you every five seconds, do I?"

"I don't need to hear it all the time, no," Edgar snapped, "But that doesn't mean I want to decipher it out of every vague comment you make."

"Okay, okay," Dor said, shrinking a little in her seat and pouting at Ed's shirt collar. "Christ, relax. I like the fucking roses, all right? I've never gotten flowers before, so of course I fucking like them. And I like that you pay enough attention to me to know it's been three months. What else did I miss? I don't really think you're a girl, in case that didn't fucking register as a joke. Anything else I did wrong?"

"Just... just go get dressed, alright? We can both cool down," Edgar answered.

"Fine," Dorcas muttered and got out of the car, slamming the door behind her. How the fuck had she messed _that_ up so royally? He'd come to take her out on a surprise date, and somehow she had fucked it all up. Dorcas knew she could be colossally bad with people sometimes, but she actually _liked_ Ed. They'd been getting along really well until now.

She let herself into her house and, feeling rather like shit, trudged up to her room to get ready, tossing the roses onto her bed gently. Taking a deep breath, she balled up her fists and yelled, "FUCK!"

Downstairs in the kitchen, Joanne Meadows spilled her tea all over the table. She stood and reached for a rag, cleaning up the mess as she listened to her youngest daughter spill out an impressive string of curse words. Walking into the living room and toward the stairs, Joanne noticed out of the window that the Bones boy was sitting in the driveway, in his car, with his head in his hands.

Joanne assumed that Dorcas' yelling and Edgar Bones' obvious distress were connected and headed upstairs toward Dorcas' room.

"Honey?" she asked coming around the door. Rather than touching on Dorcas' behaviour, she instead asked, "Why is that boy of yours parked in the driveway? He looks as though he's seriously considering driving off of a cliff, sweetie."

"Go away, Mother," Dorcas said, quickly opening her closet and beginning to rifle through her clothes as a distraction. "It's none of your business."

Completely unruffled by her Dorcas' behaviour, Joanne quirked an eyebrow. "If he drives through the living room window in a fit of depression over something you've done it'll be my business."

"I was just stupid, okay? Happy now?" Dorcas retorted, ripping some clothes off the hangers in frustration. "I said some stupid things when he was only being sweet, and he even brought me roses, and I just don't have anything to fucking _wear_. I hate being a girl! At least when I was screwing around with girls, they didn't fucking care if I wore a dress or not!"

Joanne cocked her head and blinked. "So... Edgar Bones gave you flowers and asked you to wear a dress and you're mad at him because of this?"

"No," Dorcas said, annoyed that she'd have to explain it. She sat down on her bed next to the flowers and resolutely did _not_ look at her mother. Talking to her was enough, Dorcas thought. Her mother couldn't expect her to look at her too. "He was being sweet, and I was joking that he was being a girl, and he got mad that I never say what I mean and stuff, and so I sort of yelled at him. It's all my fault. I'm not even mad at him. I told you, I'm just being fucking stupid."

It was probably the most she'd ever said to her mother about any relationship she'd been in. Her mum hadn't really wanted to hear the details of her relationships with girls, let alone help Dorcas fix them. As much as it bothered Dorcas knowing that her mother was really only ready to be supportive because it was a _boy_ , Dorcas still sort of liked the feeling of having her mother on her side.

" _Oh_ ," Joanne said thoughtfully, sitting on the bed next to her daughter. "You know, your sister was around you age when she started seeing Brian, and one day she came home in a fit of tears. You were about three, I think. She was hitting the walls, and screaming curses and generally being loud, and when I finally got it out of her what was wrong she said, 'He says that I never say what I mean, mum!' and then went into another fit of wails. Now, guess what you did?"

"I'm nothing like Gillian. She's a wishy-washy, girly girl," Dorcas muttered. "And you aren't helping. I have fifteen minutes to... whatever. Get ready. Ed made reservations at that French place."

"You're more like Gill than you think you are Dorcas," Joanne answered. "Nevertheless, you looked at your sister and told her--remember how you used to pronounce 'Brian' 'Briwan'?--you told her, 'Briwan jus' wants to know that choo' love him.'"

"I never fucking talked like that," Dorcas muttered, toeing a t-shirt on her floor, not responding to the rest of her mother's statement. Dorcas knew she was probably right, though.

Joanne rolled her eyes. " _Honestly_ , Dorcas, there's no shame in having been three-years-old. You act like you're the opposite of everything you are, and I can honestly sympathize with Edgar Bones, especially lately, as he's been putting up with you more than I have. Everything doesn't always roll in your favour, honey. You've got to give a little to get a little, and if you ask me, your boy out there gives more than his fair share."

"Oh, I give plenty," Dorcas said, make a lewd gesture in her mother's direction, hoping that if maybe she was obscene enough, her mother would just leave her alone. She had probably less than ten minutes left, and she actually did want to look good for him.

"You can't shock me anymore Dorcas. Your ability to do that stopped the day I walked in on you with the Shacklebolt girl." Joanne stood, looking pointedly at her daughter. "You might want to hurry up then. If he's waiting for you. Oh, and Dorcas, sweetie?"

"What?" Dorcas asked, sort of annoyed that even though she'd told her mother to get lost, she wasn't going to stay and be totally irritating by trying to do Dorcas' hair or something anyway. Getting up off the bed and going back to her closet, Dorcas pulled out a dark blue spaghetti strapped dress that had to be at least three years old. It would probably still fit. Dorcas hadn't grown much.

"He's not going to wait for you to smarten up forever," Joanne answered, pausing in the doorway. "He's nearly a grown man. If you want him--and I mean _really want him_ , Dorcas--you're going to have to prove it to him. Everyday."

"Yeah, yeah," Dorcas said under her breath. As much as she hated to admit it, even inside her own head, her mother was right. Dorcas had to grow up, at least a little. She heard her mother moving towards the door, and on a whim, she called out, "Mum?"

"Yes, hon?" Joanne answered.

"I'm sort of short on time," Dorcas mumbled. "Would you do my hair or something while I put on some makeup?"

Joanne smiled softly. Dorcas hadn't let her do her hair since she was about 11. "I'd be happy to sweetheart," she replied.

***

Dorcas hesitated in the entryway, fiddling with the light jacket her mother had given her. It was a few years old and a little retro, but Dorcas actually sort of liked it. It was black, and she wore some black shoes to match. They were a bit too big for her, but they were her mothers, and she had to make do. She felt like she was playing dress up, and she hoped she didn't look as ridiculous as she felt. She was a few minutes longer than Ed had said, but with her mother's help, she'd gotten ready pretty fast. Throwing the door open, she walked to the car, climbing in the passenger seat and turning to face Ed.

"So. How do I look?" she asked, smiling a little shyly. This was all such new territory for Dorcas. Shy was not an emotion she was well acquainted with.

Edgar smiled appreciatively. He'd had time to cool down from his little outburst. "You look beautiful," he said honestly, and then, grinning cheekily added, "And I can see your nipples."

"No under things," she reminded him with a cheeky smile, but then sobered. "Look, Ed. About before. I sort of..."

Edgar waved his hand. "Just. Don't worry about it, love."

"No, don't," she said, catching his hand in both of hers. "You shouldn't have to keep letting me off the hook, all right? Just shut the fuck up for a second and let me talk."

Taking a deep breath, Dorcas grinned and started with, "I love you. That's first of all. And I meant it, what I said before when I was being a fucking cunt. I really did love the flowers, and that you've been keeping track of the days. To be honest, I'm planning on drying the flowers once they wilt and keeping them somewhere safe and hidden, but I wasn't ever planning on fucking telling you that. I just... I'm not good at this, okay? Being in a real relationship and having to work for it. I've never had to work for it. I mean, it was all a secret before with Katy, and we spent so much time pretending we weren't in a fucking relationship that we never had time to focus on actually being in a relationship, you know? And I know you're really patient with me, and I'm going to try, okay, but you're going to have to keep being patient with me, at least until I get the hang of it. So. That's all. I think I'm done. For now, anyway."

Edgar leaned forward and kissed Dorcas softly on the lips. "It's ridiculous, you know," he said quietly, holding her face with his hand. "You've just taken over my life. No, you are my life. No matter how insane you drive me, or how much I wish you'd be more honest with yourself sometimes... you just _consume_ me. Every inch of me."

"Ditto," she said breathily, and then laughed a little, kissing him messily. "Okay, well, at least it's better than 'Ed, you girl', isn't it? Maybe I'm not quite so poetic about my feelings, Ed, but I _do_ love you, and I'd do about fucking anything for you. Underneath all the bravado is just, well, me. Me like I am right now, I mean. Me like only you get to see me."

"In a dress and with your hair combed you mean?" Edgar teased.

"Shut up," she said, and she suddenly realized just how annoying it must be for him that every single time he said something serious, she had to go and make a joke about it. "You know what I mean."

Edgar nodded. "Yea, I do," he said. "And you do look beautiful. And your hair is clearly more than just combed."

"Mother did it," Dorcas admitted. "She also told me I had to work for you if I wanted to keep you. 'He's a grown man. He isn't going to wait around for you to shape up forever, sweetie.' Honestly, mothers."

"I think I like your mum," Edgar said with a grin. He glanced at his watch and said. "You've distracted me with your dress, Dor. We're going to be late."

"Just wait until I distract you with other things. You'll wish we'd just fucking stayed home," Dorcas said with a lecherous grin as she waggled her eyebrows at him.

Edgar laughed. "You're something else, Princess," he said, and pulled the car out of the driveway, turning onto the street in the direction of the restaurant.

"You know, it's a bloody good thing you think I look hot," Dorcas said cheerfully. "I'd never put on a fucking dress for anyone else."


	4. Everybody's Got Somethin' to Hide (October 7th, 2006)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Where Bellatrix strikes a deal, Lucius is assigned his fate, and Narcissa doesn't have a mummy tummy God damn it!

Narcissa had only been a little nervous, and even that was only at first. She'd quickly gotten over the fact that her first photo shoot ever was _by herself_ wearing Vol de Mort Fashion's winter line for _Vogue_. Really, once the terror had subsided and she'd gone through makeup and wardrobe, she'd looked herself in the mirror with a smile and strutted out, calm and confident as ever, to pose in front of the camera.

She looked amazing. She was just as good (if not _better_ ) than the other models who she'd be sharing the seven page spread with, _and_ it hadn't been that long since she'd had darling little Draco on top of it. The fact that her figure was perfect mere months after she'd had a baby inside of her was, Narcissa thought, testament to her dedication to her craft.

So, Narcissa had no reservations whatsoever standing in front of however many people and a bunch of cameras wearing fur and leather and thrusting her hips out. She knew she looked fantastic.

"Fucking amateur!" shouted the photographer with a growl. "Can't take simple direction! Honest to fuck, you fucking Kate Moss wannabe, suck in your fucking stomach or so help me I'm going to push you out of that fucking window over there!"

Narcissa was only shocked for one, short moment, and then she was angry. She wanted to snap something cutting and cold back at him, but she remembered Bellatrix telling her once that she'd never get anywhere in the fashion industry with a mouth like hers. So instead, Narcissa glared, sucked in her stomach, and lifted her chin a little, looking proudly down at him.

She'd show him. She'd show him what she could do.

"Are you the one who just popped out the baby? Shit job on toning down the mummy tummy, eh?" the photographer commented, chewing hard on the gum in his mouth. "What'd you have, fucking quadruplets?"

Clenching her jaw, Narcissa tossed her hair over her shoulder and looked down at the man, changing her pose once more. She did _not_ have a mummy tummy. And she was also going to tell her parents about him. Perhaps they could have him fired. Mother knew someone at Vogue, didn't she? Yes, that was what she would do. Narcissa would simply make a few well-placed, artfully vague comments about inappropriate behaviour and then sit back and watch this man's career go down the drain.

"Hey Lou, get some powder on this bitch's thighs, will you? The camera is picking up the stretch marks," the photographer called to the makeup guy, shaking his head. "Fucking Riddle'll hire anything these days so long as it's got spiffing tits."

"I do _not_ have stretch marks on my thighs!" Narcissa snapped, and whipped her head around to glare furiously at the man who'd begun to make his way towards her, already fingering his makeup belt. He faltered and she gave him a look that quite succinctly let him know he would not be going anywhere near her thighs.

Bellatrix, who'd be lurking around the corners of the set mumbling comments to herself, stepped in here with a sigh and said, "Enough of this. Narcissa, go change into your next outfit. Lou, go get everyone coffee and if you give me that bullshit about it being beneath you again I'll see that you're scrubbing sewers for the rest of your life."

"Whatever you say, ma'am," Lou said, his voice only holding a hint of bitterness as he put away his makeup stuff and left to do as he was told.

Narcissa viciously slapped away the guiding hand of some speccy little idiot attempting to lead her from the room. "Do _not_ touch me, you unrefined plebeian. I know where to go."

She passed by Bellatrix on her way out, and regarded her half-sister coldly. Bellatrix was at least partially to blame for this, and even if Narcissa knew the photos would turn out brilliantly (she didn't care _what_ the photographer said about her because obviously he was _blind_ ), she intended to hold Bellatrix personally responsible. No one humiliated Narcissa Black.

Bellatrix rolled her eyes as Narcissa passed her, despite the fact that she was pleased as punch with the proceedings. She _wanted_ the photographers to push Narcissa. She _wanted_ Narcissa to get so frustrated with it all that she'd up and quit and move on with her life, because having her sister--correction: half-sister--work for Vol de Mort... Bellatrix shook her head. She was just asking for trouble.

Andrew, the photographer, came up to her grinning. "Isn't her angry face fucking fantastic? Hope she doesn't castrate me, but I've got some bloody mesmerizing shots of her looking like she wants to."

"You aren't supposed to make her angry for the sake of good photographs," Bellatrix snapped, favouring him with a distasteful look, as though he was nothing more than gum stuck to the bottom of someone else's shoe, because Bellatrix never had anything stuck to her own shoes. "I gave you two options: get her to walk out, or take pictures that will ensure her failing as a model. You are currently not fulfilling either requirement."

Andrew shrugged. "She's got possibilities Mrs. Lestrange. She's enigmatic for Christ's sake. Why do you want to pass up on that?"

Bellatrix watched a tall, blond man walk through the door and, without looking at Andrew, said coldly, "You are not being paid to ask me questions, and you would do well to remember that. We're done." With that, she left Andrew and approached the blond man who, if she was not mistaken, was Lucius Malfoy, Narcissa's... something. She gave him a severe look and said in a clipped voice, "This is a closed set."

Lucius raised an eyebrow. "You must be Bellatrix," he said, indifferently. He had heard about the woman certainly, long before he'd ever been involved with Narcissa. Now he knew what Bellatrix _was_ , or at least what Narcissa had willingly given up about her, the little blackmailing minx. "I'm Lucius. Narcissa's fiancé."

"I know who you are," she said and, against her better judgement, gestured to the coffee that Lou had just returned with. "Coffee?"

"Yes, thank you," Lucius answered, surprised. Then, an unconventional inquiry: "How is Narcissa doing with... _this_?"

"She, unsurprisingly, photographs well," Bellatrix answered shortly, voice lacking any emotion as she took two cups of coffee off of Lou's tray and held one out to Lucius. She wondered, suddenly, what Lucius thought of Narcissa getting in with Vol de Mort Fashions. "I'm sure you'll be glad to hear that the photographer, Andrew Mulciber, thinks Narcissa is quite the little prodigy."

Lucius frowned. He hardly thought that 'glad' suited how he felt about Narcissa working with Vol de Mort. "I see," he said simply, taking the offered coffee from Bellatrix.

So he wasn't so pleased, then. Raising an enquiring eyebrow in his direction, Bellatrix commented idly, "Cutthroat industry, modelling. I do hope Narcissa doesn't get herself into trouble."

Now was she referring to modelling in general or Vol de Mort specifically? It was hard to tell. "Indeed. She's headstrong, Narcissa. It's hard to reason with her."

"She has an unfortunate knack for making enemies," Bellatrix said, nodding in agreement. Being cryptic was inefficient, however, and Bellatrix quickly tired. She much preferred blunt, and she suspected Lucius was devoted enough to Narcissa that Bellatrix would not encounter any resistance. Lowering her voice, she said more personally, "She needs protection, Lucius."

Lucius nodded absently. "I expected as much. With her working here."

"I..." Bellatrix trailed off and looked at Lucius. "I assume you know what she is to me."

"Yes," Lucius answered.

Bellatrix nodded again and, eyes straight forward, as though her attention really was, as it should be, on supervising the changes being made to the set, she began to speak. "I have made my decisions, and I stand by them. I regret nothing. But the changes, the _plans_... I will not have Narcissa caught up in it simply because her youth, ambition, and naïveté has put her in the wrong place at the wrong time. There is, of course, only so much I can do. It would be beneficial to her well being if I had access to... additional resources."

"Specifically, what?" Lucius asked.

"A tool. A bargaining chip. Something I may use without reservation should anything happen," she answered. Finally, she turned her head and looked at him as she added, "Someone who would do anything for her."

"Myself, in other words," Lucius replied, thoughtfully. After a moment he said, "I'd be willing to submit myself to that. For her."

"Are you sure you understand the seriousness of the situation?" Bellatrix asked shrewdly. She didn't know what he might have heard about Tommy and Vol de Mort Fashions lately, but whatever it was, it was likely not even in the same league as the truth. Things were going to get ugly, and Bellatrix would be right in there. She would much rather Lucius go down than Narcissa, and she had no qualms about him knowing that. Things were as they were, and sugar coating it would do neither of them any favours. It all came down to what lengths he would go to for Narcissa.

"I'm sure that I shall be informed regardless of what I know, suspect, or don't," Lucius answered. "She is the mother of my child, Bellatrix. I don't think I have to say much beyond that."

"Good," she said, and then allowed a little emotion to come through as she flashed him a small, tight smile. "I'm glad."

Lucius nodded curtly. "All you have to do is tell me when. As I'm sure that it's inevitable, is it not?"

"It depends, really, on Narcissa," Bellatrix replied. "As I've no doubt she will take every opportunity presented to her, and also many that are not, she will likely climb through the ranks quickly. In that case, yes. It is inevitable. If she were to, for example, meet a road block early on, any unfortunate situations could possibly be circumvented."

The last three words were spat venomously in Andrew's direction; as though Bella wished each one were a poison dart.

Lucius licked his lips. His mouth suddenly felt very dry. "Damn," he muttered quietly.

Not quite quietly enough, however, that Bellatrix didn't hear. Giving him a thinly veiled look of disgust, Bella, in a tone meant to imply she wasn't sure he was _worthy_ of a Black, informed him coolly, "You may still change your mind if you aren't willing to take the risk."

"Pull your head out of your arse," Lucius responded with a wave of his hand. "I am merely in awe of the situations that Narcissa seems to put herself in without conscious thought. Our relationship, Draco, and now this insane need to be a model despite not needing the money nor having the dedication or work ethic. I support her, but I knew that this... I knew that she was better off staying out of it. But once she sets her mind on something it is impossible to convince her to be reasonable."

"I see," Bellatrix said, unable to hide an amused smile. Perhaps Lucius was worthy indeed. She should have expected Narcissa to have good taste. Pulling a business card out of her handbag, Bellatrix held it out to him. "Narcissa will be out soon. It won't do to have her overhearing anything. You may reach me at this number, though obviously only in the case of emergencies."

Lucius took it. "You'll pardon my lack of carded information, but I'm sure you know Narcissa's home number in any case. Seeing as we share one," he said. "You know where to find me. I believe I'll go before she comes back. It doesn't do to leave Draco alone with the nanny for such a time. And Bellatrix?"

"Yes?" Bellatrix asked.

"Thank you." Lucius turned on his heel to leave and, realizing that he hadn't taken a sip of his coffee, did so now only to find that it was cold. He dropped it in the rubbish bin and left.

Once he was out of the door, and thus out of hearing range, Bellatrix murmured her own soft, "And thank you, Lucius." It didn't matter that he didn't hear it. Bellatrix Lestrange did not make it a habit of thanking people anyway.

Not a minute after he left, Narcissa re-entered the room looking predictably stunning in her second outfit. Bellatrix watched with a smirk as she approached Andrew and sunk her nails into his arm as she whispered something undoubtedly scathing into his ear.

Oh yes, Narcissa, at great danger to herself, would most definitely go far.

Certainly she was no delicate, helpless little girl, but she didn't even know how deep the water was, and that was the most dangerous way to get in over one's head. Bellatrix was quite pleased indeed for Lucius' help. Together, they wouldn't let Narcissa drown.


	5. The Big Money (October 10th, 2006)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Where Remus is astounded by generosity, Regulus tries new things, and Sirius grows up, just a little bit.

The cleaning lady led Sirius and Remus out of the foyer and into what she referred to as the "sitting room." She left them there, and Sirius stared in awe at the winding staircase in the centre of the room, the overflow of art deco, and the bright, red, vinyl looking couch. Uncle Alphard had always had strange taste, Sirius knew, but he wasn't exactly expecting this when he was asked over.

He and Remus were meeting with Eamon Hillard, Alphard's live-in partner of thirteen years. The cancer had finally beaten Alphard the week before, and he and Remus had spoken briefly with Eamon at the funeral (the only Blacks in attendance being Sirius and Regulus, of course), and he'd asked Sirius to come over to discuss "legal matters." Sirius didn't have a clue as to what that meant exactly, for Alphard's wealth had been of no consequence to him; he just saw his uncle as a very loving, understanding man; a man who'd already experienced the same sort of rejection from their family that Sirius had.

Sirius sat down on the vinyl couch and tapped his fingers impatiently on his knees.

Remus sat next to Sirius, trying not to appear snoopy as he glanced around the room. Alphard and Eamon had acquired some fantastic things over the years. Thirteen years was a long time to be together, and Remus couldn't imagine losing such a huge part of himself like that. He'd never even met Alphard Black, and he was almost choking on the grief he imagined Mr. Hillard must have been feeling. He and Sirius had only been together for a little over a year, and if he lost Sirius... Well, it didn't bear thinking about. He wouldn't lose Sirius. They had their whole lives ahead of them.

"Hello gentlemen," Eamon greeted them from the top of the stairs. He made his way down and offered the two young men a sad smile before seating himself on a blue and white chair with only one arm and an asymmetrical back. "Thank you for coming. Can I get you anything?"

"Ah, no," Sirius said, feeling a little awkward. "I mean, I'm okay. Thank you."

"I'm fine as well," Remus answered, voice soft, as though afraid speaking too loud might break the old fellow before him.

"Then I may as well get right to business," Eamon replied and crossed his legs, linking his fingers around his knee. Eamon was a debonair sort of man, with artfully shaggy grey hair and wrinkles suiting a man of his age. He took a deep breath and said calmly, "I've asked you here to discuss the details of Alphard's will."

Sirius furrowed his eyebrows. "What about it?" He felt as though he was sitting on pins and needles, and half-expected Alphard to come walking into the room at any second with a jovial wave and laugh, claiming it had all just been one big joke.

"I... have worked hard for many, many years," Eamon began. "I'm retired now, and I have a nice little sum put away in the bank that will last me undoubtedly long past the end of my days. I have no mortgage to pay; I have no debts to square. All I have is time left to spend here, in my home. This is why when Alphard, a few weeks before he passed, confronted me about changing his will, I encouraged it whole-heartedly. It was the man I loved, not his money. What do I have to spend money on, after all?"

Remus ached for this man and for how alone he seemed. It was terrible, perhaps, but Remus couldn't even focus on Mr. Hillard's words enough to figure out what he was talking about. All Remus could think about was how he never, ever wanted to end up like him. As a child, Remus had no problem spending days at a time alone. Now that he knew what it was like to let someone in, to have someone like Sirius in his life, he desperately, _desperately_ wished he would never, ever lose that. 

Sirius ran his hand slowly through his hair. "So... what does Uncle Alphard changing his will have to do with us?" he asked quietly, almost afraid to speak for fear of breaking the atmosphere that had been set on the room once Eamon had started talking.

"It has everything to do with you, Sirius," Eamon said fondly. He thought Alphard had made a wonderful decision, and was glad life might now be a little bit easier for the Black children. "You and your brother are the only family Alphard has. So, he decided to leave everything, besides the house, of course, to you and Regulus."

Remus promptly snapped out of his thoughts and blinked at Mr. Hillard. "Everything? I mean. That is. What do you mean by _everything_?"

Sirius looked at Eamon with his eyes wide, his mouth gaping slightly. "I... just. Everything? He's left us _everything_?"

Eamon let out a short shotgun of laughter (a habit he'd undoubtedly picked up from Alphard over the years), and smiled. "Yes. Everything. And by _everything_ , Remus, I mean everything. Some stocks here and there, and some shares in an investment company. As well as all the money in the bank, of course. I don't know the figure off the top of my head, but I'd imagine it's a couple hundred thousand. Half will go to you as soon as the paperwork goes through, and half will be put in an account that your brother can access as soon as he comes of age."

"A couple... a couple hundred..." Remus began, and then shook his head and trailed off. He felt oddly that he shouldn't be there, that it was a family thing. But he had a feeling both Eamon and Sirius would say Remus was about as much part of the family as Eamon himself was, so he didn't bring it up. It didn't stop him from feeling a little like an intruder on a family matter, however. Black family politics and the results thereof (whether good or bad) always left Remus feeling a little out of sorts, however.

Sirius was completely floored. Flabbergasted. Blown. The Fuck. Away.

"Oh... God," he managed, and choked a little bit. Alphard didn't need to do that. It was... well it was just all too much. He and Regulus wouldn't have any worries financially now. They wouldn't have that lingering familial annoyance dangling over their heads. They could _move past it_ , and _be their own people_.

"That's just, I mean," Remus said, shaking his head. Could they really accept it? It wasn't going to Remus, he knew, and it was in no way his place to reject it, but part of him felt like Mr. Hillard should take the money and try to enjoy the rest of his life. Even though he'd already said he didn't want it. Even though Sirius and Regulus could really use it, and they _deserved_ to get a break for once, instead of always getting the short end of the stick. It all just felt too good to be true. "That's just amazing."

"It is amazing, I agree," Eamon said. "It is what I lived with every single day for the last thirteen years, because that was what Alphard was. Amazing. I'm glad I got the opportunity to share that with you, even if you didn't know him well. That is why I wanted to tell you in person, so I hope you'll forgive an old man for taking up your afternoon. Giving you this news is one thing throughout these terrible past few days that I have been able to look forward to, and I'm sorry Regulus couldn't be here as well."

"He's going to pass out when I tell him," Sirius commented idly, staring at some point beyond Eamon. "I mean... that is the most unbelievable... My parents are going to throw a shit fit."

"The Blacks can throw whatever they'd like," Eamon said evenly. "They still aren't getting a bloody pence."

"Thank you, Mr. Hillard," Remus said suddenly, and wished desperately for a stronger word. Did he know really what he'd just given Sirius and Regulus? It was an unbelievable gift. Remus wanted to make him see what it really meant, that it was freedom, but he didn't know how to say it.

***

Sirius bounced on his heels outside of the maths classroom, annoyed that Professor Slughorn had told him to wait, "And not in the class, Mr. Black," for his brother, as he'd refused to let Sirius drag Regulus out of class to tell him the news. Sirius had caught the ferry out of Salcombe the minute he and Remus had left Eamon's house, and was going to bust soon if the damn bell didn't ring and Regulus didn't come out so he could be informed of his soon to be inherited plethora of riches.

As soon as Sirius had burst into the classroom (and been summarily thrown back out again), Regulus had stopped taking notes on the lecture and started writing notes back and forth with Augustus. Neither boy could figure out what exactly it was Sirius might be here about, but Regulus was dead curious.

It seemed ages before class was finally over, but as soon as it was, Reg was on his feet and out the door.

"Never thought you'd step foot back in this building," Reg said in greeting, smirking at his brother. "Must be important then. What's happened?"

"You're going to _piss_ yourself," Sirius answered, still bouncing. "Remus and I went to visit Eamon today."

"Right," Regulus said, confused. What could their dead uncle's boyfriend have had to say that was big enough to prompt Sirius to come all the way here?

The other students were leaving the classroom now too, and Gus nodded a greeting at Sirius as passed the two boys and began to head up the hall. "You'll tell me at dinner, right Reg?"

"Yeah, yeah, as soon as Sirius spits it out," Regulus replied, rolling his eyes as Gus disappeared around the corner. Gus was likely just about as curious as Reg was about it all, of course. Reg knew the only reason he didn't stay to listen in and find out was because he was intimidated by Sirius. Idiot. "What about Eamon then?"

"Well, just before he died, Alphard had his will rearranged," Sirius said, beaming broadly now. "Turns out he's left the two of us _everything_."

"He's what," Regulus deadpanned, the words more a pronouncement of his shock than a question.

" _Everything_ ," Sirius replied. "Split between us. I get mine now, and you get yours when you come of age, all that. Eamon tossed out a net figure of somewhere in the high hundred thousands. Plus stocks and, _oh God_ is this fucking unbelievable. It's even more surreal repeating it to you than it was to hear it in the first place."

"I don't believe you," Regulus said shrewdly. "You're just trying to get me all excited and then you're going to have a laugh with your mates about how you tricked your ickle brother again."

"Oh fuck off," Sirius answered. "Like I'd lie to you about anything concerning Uncle Alphard. Seriously Reg. If I wanted to have you on I would've rung you up."

"You... you're serious? I mean, shut up about your name," Regulus said quickly. "You aren't joking? We're rich? Well, not... but I mean, hundreds of thousands of... You mean it?"

Sirius nodded vigorously. "Serious. I mean it. Really."

"Holy shit," Regulus whispered, and then met his brother's eyes with an excited grin. "I mean. Bloody hell! That's... We... This is ruddy _fantastic_ , Sirius! We should celebrate. Have you got time to stay for a while?"

While he'd never tell Sirius, Regulus sort of missed living with his brother. He'd gotten used to being able to be friends with Sirius without the oppressive, hateful environment their parents' home had provided. That summer had been the first opportunity that Regulus had really had to actually get to know Sirius, and while they certainly still argued, Regulus had found that he actually _liked_ his brother. He was more than a little crazy, totally unable to perform even the most basic of cleaning duties, and bloody crazy for another bloke, but Reg had had a great summer anyway. ...Except for the all too frequent instances of nudity and walking in on things he definitely did not need to see.

Sirius glanced at his watch. "The next ferry leaves in... an hour and a half. So I have that and the time it takes to get to the docks. As I have work in an hour," Sirius added with a laugh.

"Idiot. Guess it doesn't really matter if you get fired though, does it?" Reg commented with a smile. "You don't have to live pay check to pay check anymore. Come on; let's go hang out in my room for a bit. Gus has some pretty wicked video games. His collection is even better than Potter's."

"Blasphemy!" Sirius said. "And you know that Gus is frightened to death of me. Do you really want to subject him to me, as I currently am, hyped the fuck up on inheritance?"

"He isn't frightened of you. You just put him a bit on edge or something. Who knows," Regulus said. "Anyway, he tutors people in French Tuesday afternoons. He's been fluent since he was seven. Anyway, he'll be busy until dinner."

"Okay, then," Sirius agreed cheerfully. "And you know, I could be totally wrong, Reg, but I sort of think he's into you."

"Oh, he's not," Regulus answered swiftly, and then turned red as he made his way up the hall towards his room. He was _not_ going to tell Sirius about his weekend. He absolutely was _not_.

Sirius raised his eyebrows. "Oh, ho, I'll bet he is by that reaction," he said, smile growing wider. "He was red as a rutabaga when he spoke to you after your class."

"No he wasn't," Regulus replied, pulling out his keys and reaching to unlock his door. Regulus hadn't gotten either of the tower rooms after Sirius and his friends had graduated as he'd hoped, but on the bright side, his bedroom was only one floor up above the classrooms, and it was much closer to everything else than the Marauders had been. "What video game do you want to play?"

"Fuck the video games," Sirius answered. "I want to know why talking about Augustus having a crush on you is making you look like your brain is about to explode."

"No reason, all right? Just..." Regulus said, but trailed off after he'd closed the door behind Sirius and turned around to see Sirius' face. Obviously Sirius wasn't going to let it go. "Look, I'll tell you, but you have to promise not to take the piss out of me, alright?"

Sirius looked at his brother sceptically. "Is this going to be a serious brotherly talk, or is it going to be hard for me not to take the piss out of you?"

"Will either of those options get me out of telling you?" Regulus asked, clinging to a hope he knew was pointless.

Sirius snorted. "No," he said with a wry smile.

"Then it doesn't very much matter what it is, does it?" Regulus retorted dryly and sat down on his bed, inspecting his nails rather than looking at Sirius. He figured he might as well get it over with as quickly as possible. This was a conversation he definitely did not want to be having, but Sirius was like a dog with a bone when he got interested in something.

"Okay, well," Reg began. "Gus and I got drunk this weekend and started talking about, you know, how I'd lived with you all summer. I complained about, you know, walking in on you and Lupin doing all sorts of dirty things, and then one thing led to another and, well. We just... you know. After, though, we both decided we definitely liked birds. And that's all. Don't laugh."

Blinking confusedly, Sirius wrinkled his brow. "Waaaaiiit a second. So. Wait. You two fooled around?"

"Look, it wasn't a big deal, all right?" Reg replied uncomfortably, shooting a nervous look at his older brother. Sirius was probably the only person Regulus had ever looked up to, and even though Regulus had reacted rather badly when Sirius had first gotten the familial boot, Regulus still cared about him more than anyone else. When he was a kid he'd always wanted to be just like Sirius. Reg thought it made sense that he would be a little intrigued by Sirius going and shacking up with a boy. "I was just curious what all the fuss was about."

"So, like," Sirius said. "What did you _do_ , exactly?"

"I’m not going into detail about it," Regulus snapped unnervingly, his cheeks burning.

"Oh, come on," Sirius encouraged. "It's not as though you're not _dying_ to tell someone, and who else is there? Remus?"

Regulus raised an eyebrow at Sirius. "I think the longest conversation I've had with Remus to date was either about books, school, schoolbooks, or, for a shocking change of pace, _books at his library that aren't available at the school_. I'm not exactly going to ring him up and get all explicit over the phone."

Sirius laughed. "Well then. If you can't tell _me_ , your one and only big brother, who _can_ you tell?"

"It's just... weird," Regulus said, with a shrug. "Besides. We're supposed to be celebrating coming into money and perhaps writing cards to Mother and Father that read, 'Oh, look, we're rich now, so fuck you.'"

Sirius smacked Regulus upside the head and said, "We can write nyah nyah nyah boo boo notes later. I want to hear _this_ now."

"Ow, Christ, fine," Regulus complained, rubbing his head. "We just, you know, uh, kissed a bit, and ended up rolling around with our clothes off and our hands everywhere, all right? We didn't _shag_ or anything."

"Rolling about with your clothes off and hands everywhere?" Sirius questioned. "Did you like, jerk each other off, or just grind, or was there some sucking...?"

"I can't believe you're asking me this," Regulus said through gritted teeth, blushing fantastically. "There was a bit of all three, all right? Why do you even want to know?"

"Well, why not?" Sirius asked. "Who did what?"

Regulus stared at Sirius for a moment, and then gave up completely. "He sort of got himself off on my leg while we were just snogging or whatever, and then he did me with his mouth. Then I did him with my hand because he was hard again."

Sirius was smiling widely. "Aw," he said. "My little brother's growing up so fast! His first experiment with another bloke!" Sirius pretended to choke up and wiped a fake tear away from his eye. "I'm so proud!"

"Shut up," Reg said. Of course, even though Sirius was joking, Regulus wasn't sure Sirius had ever told him he was proud of him before. "I know I said... a lot of things about you, you know, after everything sort of blew up. I know I've already said sorry, but... Okay, this is stupid, but I just thought, well, if you're going to hell for it, now so am I. So. Family's got to stick together, right?"

Sirius mussed up Regulus' hair. "I didn't know you loved me so much, Reg," he said. "And I'm impressed that, drunk or not, you went through with that."

Regulus shrugged and hid a smile as he pushed Sirius' hand away and smoothed his hair back down before shooting Sirius and conspirational look. "Well. Gus was actually sort of keen on the idea. I didn't even have to suggest it. He swears he likes girls, though, and I swore I'd never suggest otherwise, so you can't tell anyone anything about him."

"My gay-dar might be a little out of tune, but I'm pretty sure he was up for it without the alcohol," Sirius said.

"He's an all right bloke. I suppose if I were ever to fancy a guy, it'd probably be him," Regulus said contemplatively, and then shook his head. "I do like girls, though. I mean. I wasn't thinking about him that night."

"Who were you thinking about, then?" Sirius asked, curiously. "Particularly when you were giving Augustus a hand job." He grinned.

Regulus turned bright red again and lied desperately, "No one in particular. Can we play video games now that I've told you all about my first, and likely only, homoerotic experience?"

"You're such a horrible liar," Sirius teased. "Come on. You've given me intimate details about your naked romp with Augustus Rookwood, but you can't tell me the name of the bird you were thinking of while you were holding his cock? Terrible..."

"It's none of your business," Regulus replied sullenly. "Besides, it's stupid anyway. She's out of my league."

This prompted several things to happen. First off, Sirius' eyebrows reached his hairline in surprise. Second off, in one quick movement he locked Regulus' head between his arm and started giving a horribly hard noogie. "Tell me and I'll stop!" he insisted.

"Ow!" Regulus complained. "Get _off_ me!" He struggled with all his might against Sirius, but in the end, he couldn't get away and it bloody _hurt_ , and he had no other option than to grunt, "Emmeline Vance, okay? I've liked her for ages, now get _off_!"

"Em?" Sirius said, surprised, letting go of Regulus' head. "Seriously? I mean. _Emmeline Vance_ , really? I never would've pegged her as _your_ type."

"Of course she is. She's amazing," Regulus replied, fixing his hair yet _again_ and trying to scrape the remainder of his pride back together. "She's smart and pretty and artistic and thoughtful and she was always kind to me, in her own, blunt way, and she's totally, completely out of my league. And I know that, so you don't have to rub it in."

Sirius rubbed the back of his neck. "You're going hate me for telling you this but... Leroy popped the question, eh? Sometime last month. And uh. She said yes."

"Of course she did," Regulus sighed. "I mean, they've been together for ages. So. It's fine. It doesn't matter. Even if Leroy wasn't around, she wouldn't have given me the time of day."

"Don't sell yourself short, little brother," Sirius said, punching Regulus lightly in the arm. "Leroy just got there first, that's all. Shit happens." Sirius decided then and there that he wouldn't tell Regulus that Emmeline had (as Sirius had decreed at the time he found out) 'given up her blessed virgin flower.'

Regulus gave his brother a look of disdain, which Regulus personally thought he'd perfected. He could give disdainful looks in all sorts of varieties, and this one in particular was a 'don't insult my intelligence with such ridiculous lies' sort of disdain. Of course, all he said in response was, "Whatever. Anyway, I heard the Hobbled Gordons got signed."

"Yeah, they did indeed," Sirius said, ignoring Regulus' look. He'd meant what he'd said. He leaned back on the wall with his hands behind his head. "Went up for a big meeting in London, and only spent like, five seconds in the bloke's office before they were shoved into a recording studio."

"They aren't even very good," Regulus drawled. "They only really have three good songs, and the rest are practically all the same, just with different lyrics and different chords."

Sirius laughed. "Jealous much?"

"No. I don't dislike them because of Leroy. I dislike them because they lack talent," Regulus replied stubbornly. "Look, are we going to play video games or not?"

"Yeah, yeah," Sirius said. "You've already killed the majority of my ferry wait. Think Horrace'd string me up by my bollocks if I just didn't bother to show up for work tonight?"

***

Though the library closed at five, Remus was required to stay and work for a while putting books back and going through whatever section the other classes used to make sure they'd put their books back properly. Remus privately thought that the instructor who taught the Library Use classes to the middle school children should have to do it, but he was the newest employee, so he thought it was probably not wise to complain. Even if lately he, without fail, had to tell at least one set of parents a week that their child had attempted to look up porn on a public computer. (He couldn't wait for the most recent batch of classes to be over. It had been the same child three weeks in a row, and he'd dragged his friends into it this time.)

Needless to say, Remus was rather glad to be going home, and couldn't wait until they realized that while Remus did know computers, he also knew books well enough that they ought to let him teach those classes instead. People who took the classes on, say, Romantic Literature or How To Unlock Your Library's Potential were generally of a more mature disposition than the classes set up through the local schools that taught children how to use the internet properly.

He, thankfully, had a fresh stack of books today that he was eager to dive into, and by the time he was off the bus and home (and also midway through chapter three of the first book), he had quite forgotten the trials of the day.

Of all the things he had run into while he had his nose in his book, Sirius had not been one he'd been expecting.

Blinking, Remus asked, "What are you doing home? You're supposed to be at work."

"Decided not to go," Sirius announced, grinning from ear to ear. "You'll never believe what I did."

"What did you do?" Remus asked, setting his bag of books down, using the receipt to mark his page as he looked curiously at the papers Sirius had spread over the table. "And what's all this?"

"I like to call it, 'Sirius Black and the Adventures of his Crayola Markers' or, if you're so inclined, 'Sirius Black Pulls Up His Trousers and Makes Decisions Involving Money That Can Benefit Us Both'." He grabbed Remus by the hand and sat him down at the table, putting the last few, well-arranged (if atrociously hand-written) pages in front of him. "Go on then," Sirius said. "Read them."

Remus did as told and read the pages placed before him.

There were all sorts of figures on the pages. Figures labelled _tuition_ and _commute time_ and _rent/food/other_ , and Sirius had created a budget that allowed for Remus, presumably, to attend the University of Bath. Starting in January, if the messy scrawl reading 'Acceptance and registration deadline coming up fast for winter term!'

"Oh, _Sirius_ ," Remus breathed and looked up at him.

"Well. Did I do good then?" Sirius asked.

Remus felt sort of like he didn't even know _how_ to express his gratitude to Sirius, and so he just leaned forward and kissed Sirius over all of his hard work and handwritten calculations. "You did... you're amazing. You. I can't accept it, of course, but Sirius, that you would even _think_ of... it's just... Yes. You did good."

"Wait, what? What do you mean you can't accept it?" Sirius questioned, his eyebrows creasing. "I didn't do all that for shits and giggles you know. I have a wrist cramp. Of course you're accepting it."

"Sirius, that's your money. It's... I can't take that from you. University is thousands and thousands of dollars, and..." Remus trailed off as he noticed that Sirius had even written down the cost of a bus pass from here to Bath. There was even a part that read 'find an alarm clock with headphones so Remus can get up at some bloody awful hour without waking his sexy, sleepy head boyfriend! (Me!)'

Remus suddenly wanted to cry, and he knew he couldn't refuse it. He remembered how Sirius had reacted to thinking he was the only thing keeping Remus from university, and Remus wouldn't do that to him again just because Remus was weird about money.

"But you want it and I can give it to you, so what's the problem really?" Sirius asked. "I mean, it's the least I can give to you, you know."

"You don't owe me anything, Sirius," Remus said softly, and didn't even know how to go about accepting a gift as huge as this. He just kept staring at the pages and pages of information before him. Sirius must have been working for hours.

"Sure I do," Sirius said. "You do everything for me, Remus, like a parent for God's sake. You even scrub my scummy dishes, and say you don't care so long as I walk around naked. How does that get us anywhere but lubed up in the bedroom? I want to give you something that I know you want and because I can. I mean. As far as I'm concerned, this money is _ours_ , you know that, right? It's going to be for us, for our life together. Not my life alone because I'll just waste it on Guinness and wax for the bike or something."

Remus understood all of that. He could accept it. It made sense. All except the first three words. "Sirius. You don't owe me anything. I won't take it if you're only doing this because you think you're indebted to me. You aren't. You've made me happier than I've ever been in my life, Sirius. I wouldn't change anything about you or this or our lives for anything."

Sirius blinked. "Well no. I just feel like you take care of me and now I want to take care of you. Doesn't that make sense, or does that just sound horrible?"

"Whatever I do for you, I do because I love you," Remus told him. "I don't do anything I don't want to do. I don't do it because I want something in return."

"I know that. I'm not doing it because I feel obligated, Remus. I'm doing it because I want to. Exactly what you just said, and exactly what I've been saying."

Remus felt his stomach clench a bit. University. In a few _months_. He'd... he'd have so much to organize. He couldn't even _imagine_... Thank goodness he'd been accepted to Plymouth as well, not that he'd told Sirius that. It was much closer. It was utterly impossible to commute all the way to Bath just for school, and Plymouth had a three year English and Creative Writing program. He could study literature _and_ poetry...

Finally, Remus stirred himself from his racing thoughts and sucked in a breath and said softly, "Well. Thank you then. You have... you have no idea what you've. I mean. What it means to me that I, that you... Just, thank you."

Sirius smiled and leaned in for a slow, soft kiss. "You're welcome," he said. "And I love you. I really do."

"I love you too," Remus whispered after the kiss broke. He kissed a trail from Sirius' mouth to his ear and then said, "Sirius, there's no one else in the world like you. I consider myself unbelievably lucky to even have met you, let alone to have you like this. I don't think I tell you often enough how completely proud I am of you, or how utterly grateful I am that you chose me."

"We kind of chose each other, didn't we?" Sirius said. "I mean. I don't think, had we gone on ignoring what was obviously there, that we'd ever have found anything so obviously right as this."

***

Remus was asleep, with his head in Sirius' lap, a little puddle of drool forming on Sirius' trousers. His breathing was heavy and Sirius smiled to himself as he ran his fingers through Remus' hair, watching--but not really watching--the telly.

He just couldn't believe how lucky a break this was.

Remus could get the education he wanted and still be here with everyone. With him, and James, and Lily, and Harry. They could still play the role of uncles to the baby, and now Sirius could spoil him properly, buying loads of plush animals and an excess of footie printed rompers, neither of which he needed. He could buy his friends proper birthday gifts, donate a bit to Gid and Fay for the Order, try to con Horrace into going halves on the bar with him... there were just endless possibilities.

He and Remus could buy a house any time they wanted. The could have children, raise a family. Grow old together comfortably, doing what they wanted to do rather than what they felt they had to do.

Sirius reached for the converter and turned off the telly, the blue light that had illuminated the room disappearing, leaving Sirius and Remus in total darkness. Sirius bent down and kissed Remus on top of the head before shaking him awake carefully, and felt his chest fill warmly at the sight of Remus' sleepy eyes blinking blearily up at him.

"C'mon Sir Snores-a-Lot," Sirius said, fondly, still stroking Remus' hair. "Let's go to bed. Not that I mind sleeping on the sofa or anything, but your head is giving me a leg cramp."


	6. Bad Moon Rising (October 18th-21st, 2006)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Where Hagrid is passionate, Minerva has motherly-instincts, and Fabian attracts the crazies.

**October 18th, 2006**

"Okay, seriously, what's up? Because I can tell you're all stressed about something, so just spit it out already," Hestia said suddenly, with no segue whatsoever from their previous conversation. Until a moment ago, they _had_ been talking about how long Fabian and Caradoc would likely have to save before they could afford a trip to Berlin.

Fabian smiled at Hestia and stole a piece of teriyaki tofu off of Caradoc's plate with his fingers, popping it in his mouth as he considered Hestia's question. Her forwardness was always so refreshing. Maybe they could use her opinion on the whole Order thing. She was unbiased, they trusted her, and she wasn't nearly as tied up in all the politics surrounding it as he and Gideon and Caradoc were.

"What do you think, Gideon? It might be good to get a different perspective on the whole deal," Fay suggested. Turning to Caradoc, he added, "That's really good, by the way. Want to try some of my zesty oriental salad? There are mandarin oranges in it."

Caradoc reached his fork forward and picked up a bite, sliding it into his mouth. "Tasty," he said, his eyes on Gideon.

Gideon looked at Hestia, who raised her eyebrows. Fuck it. It wasn't as if she didn't know about the Order anyhow. "Yeah, sure."

"Okay. Well. I'll give you the low down, but you have to keep it on the down low," Fabian said with a grin, amused by his own cheesy play on words. "You know Gid and I run the Order. You were in it for a short stint ages ago. Well. It's grown a lot since then, and gotten quite serious. But recently, we got published and, well, outed. So we're _still_ trying to decide on the best course of action. We don't want to disband, but we don't want to put people in danger, either. And obviously we still want to fuck Riddle up."

"Gideon told me about the magazine article," Hestia said. "Not as though I could've missed it or anything. Rita Skeeter is forever flashing the thing about at work, trying to convince them to let her run her own radio show." She shook her head. "Anyhow, that was what? Early September or something? And you lot _still_ haven't done anything about it?"

Gideon clucked his tongue. "We brought Caradoc into the core Order," he said.

"And that's it?" Hestia questioned, smirking.

Shrugging, Gideon looked at his brother. "Perhaps we're useless." He took a bite of his steak.

"Oh, shut up, Gid. We're not _useless_ ," Fabian said, waiving a hand in a gesture that was both dismissive and flamboyant. "We talked to everyone, told them about the situation. Gave them the opportunity to opt out. We took measures to keep people safe. We just... can't decide if we should go little or go big."

"Well it's your money on the line," Hestia commented airily, biting into her sandwich. Thickly, she added, "Ultimately, it's about what you're willing to spend it on. Can you _afford_ to go big?"

"Well it's not actually our money," Gideon said.

"We sort of have an anonymous benefactor," Fabian said. "Or, well, he was anonymous until a few months ago."

"So, what? You know who he is now?" Hestia asked. She pointed a fry between Gideon and Fabian and said, "What you _ought_ to do is ask him what _he_ thinks."

Fay blinked. They hadn't even thought of that. But Albus Dumbledore had been around a great deal longer than he or Gideon, and the old codger had some uncanny ability to know everything. He'd probably be able to give them some great advice.

"Maybe we should, eh Gid?" Fay asked thoughtfully, and pinched another bit of tofu off of Caradoc's plate, using his fingers again instead of his fork.

Gideon nodded. "That would've been the smart thing to do in the first place," he said. "I mean, he was right last time, wasn't he? And we _still_ haven't 'nipped that in the bud' as he'd suggested."

"Well, it wasn't for lack of trying," Fabian said. "What were we supposed to do? Interrogate everyone? It would just make it worse if everyone thought we suspected everyone else, and we likely still wouldn't have found the spy. It would've just destabilized the Order by ripping the trust apart. So you think we need an appointment to see Mr. X, or can we just pop up for tea and biscuits?"

"Pop in," Gideon answered. "He doesn't seem like a pre-planned day sort of bloke."

"Well, that's settled then. We might as well go this afternoon," Fabian said brightly, grinning. He'd had a feeling Hestia would come up with something helpful, and lo and behold. Maybe it wasn't a solution, but it was a step. "Thanks Hes. So. Has anyone heard about that rave supposedly happening this weekend?"

"Seeing as you told me about it, yes," Caradoc said, smiling. "I think you're just looking for an excuse to wear glitter and get me into a pair of vinyl pants."

"Who's hosting a rave _here_?" Hestia asked, surprised. "I mean, I'm surprised the old biddies at the church aren't lobbying at wherever it is, denouncing the evils of E or whatever."

"Well, actually, it's about a half an hour's drive," Fabian said. "It's in a field this side of Kingsbridge. They're bringing a generator and everything to power the music and lights. It's going to be going for like, twenty four hours straight." Shooting Caradoc a mischievous look, Fabian added, "And no comment on the glitter and vinyl. Except to, perhaps, say it'll be sparkles and pleather."

***

**Later That Day**

"I'm flattered you value my advice that much," Albus said. He was leaning back in his desk chair with his hands folded across his lap. "What I'm surprised about, however, is that you didn't think of it earlier. I give good advice you know. Or so I'm told anyhow." He leaned forward and reached for a dish of candies on his desk. "Sherbert lemon?"

"Thanks," Fay said absently, popping a weird little candy into his mouth. "And I don't know why we didn't. I think we were just kind of stuck, you know?"

"Yeah, pretty much," Gideon echoed, taking a candy. "Sometimes the more obvious answers are right under your nose."

Albus smiled wryly. "Or feeding your illegal organization?"

Gideon snorted, almost choking on his candy. "Yes," he said, coughing as Fabian thumped him on the back. "Something like that."

"So?" Fabian asked with a bright smile after giving his brother a look that clearly said, _breathe much, prat_? "What wisdom do you have to share with us today?"

"Go big." Albus said simply, and had a candy himself. "Take a hold of this _Skeeter_ character. Give her an interview even. Just jump right on the bandwagon and draw in as many people as you can."

"I knew that's what you were going to say," Fabian replied enthusiastically. "We figure we ought to try to be a little more legitimate, you know? Get some _grown-ups_ involved so if the shit does hit the fan, they can't say we're just some snot-nosed little gang of kids stirring up trouble."

Albus nodded. "That's smart. I'm sure that there are many who'd be more than willing, as well as able, to help."

"You know anyone?" Gideon asked.

"I might have a few names," he said. "Try my brother, for one thing. I haven't seen him in a while--this thing with this goat, just..." Albus trailed off for a moment and then waved his hand dismissively. "Let's just say it wasn't as neat as we thought it would be. Anyhow. He runs a bakery in Kingsbridge that makes all natural pastries and buns and things. Nice place, high values, low morals, just your type."

Fabian wrinkled his nose a little and wisely decided not to ask about the goat. "Great. When can we meet him? Do you want to come along with us this weekend? We could road trip to Kingsbridge."

"Ah, no, that's fine," Albus said slowly. He hadn't been able to face Aberforth since it had happened because even just _looking_ at him was weird. How could you do brotherly things with one another with the knowledge of having seen a very forward woman do those sorts of things to a goat? They'd been high as fuck and stumbled into the warehouse like two twittering morons, sure, but _still_.

Gideon quirked an eyebrow and looked at Fabian. He really didn't want to know. Albus Dumbledore was not, by any stretch of the imagination, a normal man. Anything--even a disgusting thing--was possible.

"Okay, well. Give us the address, and we'll pop by in the next few days," Fabian said, considering the matter closed. He was a little curious as to why Albus wouldn't want to come, but he figured he was probably better off not knowing. "Do you know anyone else who might be interested? It really helps to get recommendations."

"A few of my staff might," Albus said thoughtfully. I could speak with Professor McGonagall if you like. And Professor Hagrid might be interested as well."

"Might be?" Fay asked. "Well, if he's not sure, we can send Caradoc up to persuade him. From what Cara's said, Professor Hagrid has quite a soft spot for him, especially now that he's painting again."

"Anyone else, Mr. X? I mean, Mr. Dumbledore, sorry," Gideon said.

Albus laughed. "Call me Albus at any rate," he said. "And I can't think of anyone off the top of my head, but I'll keep my eyes peeled, and you informed."

"Thanks," Fay said, stretching before getting up. "You know how to reach us. If someone's interested, feel free to give them our handy numbers."

***

**October 19th, 2006**

"Mr. Dearborn," Rubeus said, limping into the pub and depositing himself at the table Caradoc was already seated at. "Sorry m'late. Car stalled. Pint please, Mr. Black."

"Coming right up," Sirius called back with a grin, and reached for a glass.

"Hello Professor Hagrid," Caradoc said. "You didn't have to come over you know, I could've easily visited the school."

"Nah. It's good to get out every so often," Rubeus grunted in response. He wasn't the most vocal of people, but he'd come to talk with Caradoc, and talk he would. "And 'm not your professor anymore, Caradoc. You can leave that off. So. How're you? How's your art?"

"Getting somewhere, maybe," Caradoc answered, taking a sip of his drink. "I spoke with the curator of the Kingsbridge gallery and he liked a few of my pieces. He wants me to turn out a few more 'stronger' ones before he signs me for a show, however."

Sirius approached the table then with Hagrid's drink, setting it in front of him.

"Thank you, Mr. Black. Still painting?" Hagrid asked him before he had a chance to head back to the bar.

Caradoc was surprised by the question. He hadn't known that Sirius was a painter. "No," Sirius answered. "Don't have the time."

"Such a waste," Hagrid said simply. He thought people should always make the time for art. Raising his glass to Sirius in thanks before taking a sip, Hagrid smiled and asked, "Start me a tab?"

Sirius rolled his eyes, but said, "Yeah, sure," before heading back toward the bar.

"Sirius painted?" Caradoc asked, once the other man was out of an earshot.

"He did. People were his forte. Strong appreciation for the human form, that one," Hagrid mused. "Where you strengths lie elsewhere, his were in portraits."

"Really? I should ask him for tips," Caradoc answered. "Nudity, right? Not surprising coming from Sirius."

Hagrid nodded his agreement. Certainly not surprising. "But you asked for a chat for a reason."

"Right," Caradoc said, leaning forward on his elbows to speak in more of an undertone to Hagrid. "So there's this society. The bloke I'm seeing and his brother run it; it's a group of people fighting against T.M. Riddle mostly. Doing the kind of stuff that any conservation society with a reputation to maintain won't touch." Caradoc scratched his nose. "Riddle's gotten wind of what's going on, society wise, and someone in the core group of members is filtering out information to him. Like, personal information. Family stuff. The leaders have gotten a lot of threatening phone calls, broken windows, that sort of thing."

Caradoc glanced pointedly over at Sirius and then looked back at Hagrid. "Rita Skeeter posted a name in an issue of her shite little rag a few weeks back. I don't know if you've read it or even heard of it, but. We're basically looking to capitalize here. Make things bigger on our side, you know? Someone dropped us your name, and, well. You're a passionate man, Hagrid. We hope you're interested."

Passionate man. Hagrid smiled to himself. That was certainly one way to put it. Just the other day he'd thrown his bowl of crisps at the telly in the staff room when a program that was on showed a celebrity wearing a dress design of Riddle's that featured an emu and peacock feather bustle built onto a garment made entirely of white snake skin. It was both hideous and unnecessarily cruel to animals. No questions asked, he'd love to join a group against that prick. But while he may have lived as a starving artist in London for much of his life, doing as he pleased, he had responsibilities now.

"I'm a teacher. I'll lose my job if I'm not a respectable citizen," Hagrid answered reluctantly.

"I was told you'd say that," Caradoc replied. "We're all about keeping that under wraps as long as we can. I mean, it might explode, it might not. Most of us are already on the line. I mean... I haven't even been _in_ the core that long, but I'm sure Riddle knows about me because I've been with this bloke for nearly four months now. No promises, and understandable if you say no, but... Hagrid? There are other jobs, you know."

There were. He knew there were. And it had never mattered what he did. Jobs paid the bills. Art fed his soul. And Riddle was slaughtering animals and forcing children to work in out of country factories and destroying the environment, all in the name of art. If art were religion, Riddle would be a blasphemer. As it was, he was a besmircher. He was bastardizing something that belonged to the world, and using it as a weapon. It infuriated Hagrid, and it always had, even more so since he and Albus had begun to talk about it. Oh, Albus.

That made sense. Caradoc had said someone had dropped his name, and he happened to know the Prewett brothers had been up at the school the other day for a meeting with the headmaster. Grinning now, Hagrid nodded before chugging the last half of his pint and clunking the glass back down on the table.

"Yeah, all right," he agreed. "Put my name down."

Caradoc grinned broadly, causing Sirius (who'd moved from the bar to a nearby table with a rag to pretend like he wasn't eavesdropping) to smile too. _Step one_ , he thought, and snapped out of his reverie when Horrace came out of his office and snapped at him for daydreaming like a school girl with a crush.

"There's going to be a meeting, really soon," Caradoc explained. "Gid and Fay--Fay's the one I'm seeing--want to sort out their numbers first, then they're going to get everything arranged, and I'll let you know, all that. Just jot me your handy number and we'll take it from there, eh?" He held out his hand for Hagrid to shake.

"Don't have a handy. Call the school. Eunice'll put you through," Hagrid replied, motioning for another drink from Sirius as he got up and shook Caradoc's hand. "And I do check my school email. Do you still remember the address?"

"Yeah, I remember," Caradoc said with a nod. "R Hagrid, right? One word, small caps?"

"At East Portlemouth Prep, one word too," Hagrid agreed. "Keep in touch. Let me know what's going on. And get those paintings out there. I want to see them with the rest of the world seeing them. Get them out there, Caradoc."

***

**October 20th, 2006**

Sticking her head out of the door to her rooms, Minerva looked both ways up the hallway to ensure no one was around--though she did it with dignity, thank you very much--before stepping out and shutting her door behind her. She made her way just up and across the hall to the entrance of Albus' rooms, gently laying the bottle of brandy atop the fruit platter to free up a hand for knocking and drawing her dressing gown more tightly around her.

Albus had been sitting on his bed watching the telly when the knock came, and got up to open the door, surprised, in his plaid, flannel pyjamas. "Kitty!" he exclaimed with a grin, using the nickname he dubbed her nearly a decade ago for her eerie abilities of perception. She was like a cat, Minerva, able to sneak about anywhere undetected and always knew exactly what was going on without letting on to it. Noticing her full hands he took the bottle of alcohol and said, "To what do I owe the pleasure? And fruit and booze, apparently."

"My, my. I'm shocked, Albus. Don't you know what day it is today?" Minerva asked warmly, walking through the doorway was soon as he gestured for her to enter. She was pleased to see he was in his pyjamas as well, and by the sounds of the television coming from within, she'd timed her visit just right. He was finished his work for the day, yet obviously not yet in bed.

She headed straight for the sitting room, setting the fruit platter on his coffee table and seating herself on one end of the couch, her obvious ease depicting her familiarity. She had, of course, been there many times, and she'd grown comfortable enough to simply knock and let herself in, were he expecting her. She didn't much fancy catching him too of guard, however. They were both getting old, after all.

"I'm afraid not," Albus said, joining her on the couch, interested to know what sort of holiday prompted brandy and fruit as its traditional meal. He and Minerva had celebrated some weird ones in the past, but this was definitely new. "Clearly I've forgotten to add something extremely important to my calendar."

"Clearly," she replied, trying to keep her face serious though she could feel a smile coming on. "Why, it's Brandied Fruit Day. Time has passed so quickly this year without those silly, silly boys around--I'm speaking of the Marauders, of course--and I didn't realize it was already October 20th. Unfortunately, I had no time to procure any brandied fruit. Brandy _and_ fruit, however, were at hand, so I improvised. I trust you'll forgive me and celebrate this fine Friday anyway?"

Albus burst out laughing. "Kitty, you _scamp_. _Brandied Fruit Day_. Oh you know I'm good for it. What sort of movie does one watch while enjoying a nosh of fruit and brandy, I ask you?"

"Well. I do think something silly is in order, Albus," Minerva said primly, popping a fruit into her mouth.

Many of the staff members of East Portlemouth had been around for many years, but none except Albus had been at the school before Minerva herself. He'd only been a year or two ahead of her, but ever since the beginning, they'd gotten on well. No one was surprised when, as soon as Albus became Headmaster, he appointed Minerva his Deputy Headmistress. Nor was anyone put off by the choice, not even the previous Deputy Headmaster himself, who had retired now six years ago. Everyone simply accepted that Albus and Minerva made a great team. They worked well together, and, perhaps because of their friendship even before his appointment to Headmaster, Minerva had never bought into the ridiculous notion that she ought to show him more respect and hold her tongue just because he now held her job. She believed he knew how much she respected him, and the odd disagreement here or there would never change that. Besides, she was still proud that to this day, she was the only person who could continually surprise the canny old codger.

Dragging her thoughts from fond memories of the past, Minerva added, "And for Christmas this year I think I shall buy you some new pyjamas. Your blue plaid clashes dreadfully with my maroon tartan."

"Aw, no surprise then?" Albus said with a mock pout. "All the hints I've been dropping since last Christmas have gone out the window then? In one ear and out the other?" He tutted, but was still smiling. "You're going soft in your old age, Kitty."

"I am many things, Albus, but I certainly am _not_ soft," she returned brightly. In truth, she already had some purple knee high socks patterned with leprechauns with bells on them (they were the gaudiest she could find) wrapped around a small, colourful, industriously packaged umbrella hat. However ridiculous it was, he'd commented that he wanted a hat that was an umbrella, and when she'd spotted one that was a hat that was an umbrella that looked like a fish, she hadn't been able to resist. Of course, now she'd have to get him pyjamas as well, and then surprise him later on with his other gifts. "Shall we put in Napoleon Dynamite?"

"For the 100th time? Certainly," Albus replied. His grin was broad as he got up and headed for his cupboard of movies. Napoleon Dynamite was one that he and Minerva had probably (had they been counting) watched about that many times, and every time they found something new to laugh about. Albus was sure that one day, down the road, when they were old and feeble and still meeting in his room to watch Jon Heder say, 'Whatever I feel like, gosh,' one of them was going to pop a hip out of joint from laughing too hard.

"Wonderful," Minerva said, and got up to fetch them some glasses. Returning quickly, she set both glasses onto coasters on the table, and poured a healthy amount of brandy into them before setting the bottle back down and lifting both glasses, sipping hers and holding the other out to Albus as he returned to the couch. Minerva often wondered how it was she enjoyed Napoleon Dynamite so much, and decided it was certainly just Albus' influence. She was a different person with him. "I quoted it the other day. Unintentionally, of course. The students all looked at me as though I'd sprouted a tail and cat ears right there in class. Of course, to spare them all early heart failure, I pretended I didn't know what it was from."

Albus laughed. "Which part did you quote, exactly?" he asked, taking the offered glass and sitting back down before reaching on the coffee table for the converter. "And how on _earth_ did it fit into a physics lecture?"

"We were discussing time travel," Minerva said, waiving a hand dismissively and reaching for a grape. "I simply told a student that if they bought a time machine online, it likely wouldn't work. A student in the class made the connection, and it went from there."

"I can imagine funnier scenarios," Albus said. "Had Black or Potter been in your class still I imagine such a comment would've led into a full-fledged re-enactment."

"It certainly isn't the same without them, is it," she agreed. In all her years of teaching, she found that sometimes, a certain group of students just made an impact. The group that had just graduated had certainly been one of those. Minerva didn't think she'd ever really forget the graduating class of 2006.

"No," Albus admitted thoughtfully. "I sincerely doubt that we'll ever have another graduating class with three pregnant girls in it at once, for one thing."

Chuckling a little and shaking her head, Minerva gave Albus a mischievous look that almost seemed out of place on her serious, wrinkled face. "They certainly were a passionate group."

"Passionate about making children, you mean, or just in general?" Albus asked. Minerva's emphasis on 'passionate' registered and he wondered if now was the time to bring up the Order to her. He knew without a doubt that she'd be interested, but the context of the conversation might make or break her decision to get involved.

"Both, I suppose," Minerva replied, and was quite aware that what had been meant as a wryly amused comment had just become something bigger. "I've never seen a group of young people so aware of the world around them. Though I suppose it would be hard not to be growing up with instigators and loudmouths like Black and Potter. They certainly made everyone sit up and take notice. I was almost afraid to unleash them on the world."

Albus chuckled. "More than one parent-teacher conference with Rachel Potter has ended in us discussing James and Sirius' possible plots for world domination."

"That, Albus dear, is utterly unsurprising," Minerva replied, shifting and settling in a little closer, taking a sip from the glass dangling from her long, thin fingers. The movie had begun to play in the background, but both of them had watched it together often enough that if there was something to talk about, their attention generally focussed there first and foremost. "Now. What's on your mind? Those quick old gears in your head are spinning faster than usual. I can tell."

Smiling slyly Albus said, "You know me too well after nearly two decades, Kitty," he said, wrapping an arm around her shoulders and pulling her close. "I met with some old acquaintances of mine recently." He selected his words carefully. "They're interested in working with new people."

"Oh, dear me. You aren't talking about that little group you fund, are you? The one of which many of the aforementioned students happen to be members?" she asked. Honestly, she'd been waiting _months_ for the chance to say something about it. She'd figured out the existence of the group--and identified many of its members--about a year ago now, and riddled out Albus' involvement only a few days later. She was glad she'd not told him straight off, though, because the expression of surprise on his face was one for the record books.

"Kitty, how did you--?" Albus shook his head. "You honestly amaze me woman, what with your ability to channel all the powers that be when it comes to my personal endeavours and the gossip mill of this school."

"Oh, you're far too mysterious for your own good anyway," Minerva replied, and then pulled her legs up onto the couch and tucked them under her, turning to face him. "Now what were you being cryptic about before? They're looking for new members?"

Albus nodded. "A young woman who runs her own little newsletter outed them last month in an article and they've been debating on whether to ignore it or capitalize. They came to me and I, of course, suggested making the most out of it. They got Caradoc Dearborn--remember him? He's dating Fabian Prewett, if you'd believe it--to talk Hagrid into it. He agreed. They're going to speak to my brother as well."

"Are you planning on taking part openly?" Minerva asked. It was a good cause, yes, but he was already on thin ice with the Christian Schools Association, and they were just _looking_ for an excuse to fire him. Not that he'd ever really minded much. The grades at East Portlemouth were higher with him as Headmaster than they'd ever been, and thanks to him, East Portlemouth was within the top five preparatory schools in the country. They'd be fools to fire him. Of course, Minerva had thought for years that the lot of them were far worse than fools, and it certainly wouldn't be beyond them. If they tried, though, so help them, they'd have her to deal with. If it came down to it, she'd resign in protest.

She was getting ahead of herself, however. Hopefully it wouldn't come to that.

"I haven't yet, and I've been supporting them now for seven years," Albus answered. "And they'll be keeping yourself and Hagrid under wraps as long as possible," he added. "But there are, of course, no promises for either of us. If T.M. Riddle executes what we believe he will, I especially will have no choice but to step up. He is not a man of many morals."

Minerva was quite abruptly filled with what she assumed was the mothering instinct in her. Unable to have children of her own, Minerva had always taken this instinct out--in secret, of course--on her students. The sudden desire to protect the children she knew were involved, even if they weren't her students anymore, caused Minerva to tighten her grip on her glass.

 _Not a moral man indeed_ , she thought to herself as her admittedly impressive brain came up with a great number of the possible outcomes of going up against Riddle. She'd read all about his wildly publicized lawsuit last year from a small group of ex-employees who stepped up and claimed he'd physically, verbally, and mentally abused them while they were in his employ. If he could do that to people working _for_ him, Minerva had no illusions about what he was capable of when confronted by people working _against_ him.

"Well. I suppose someone sensible ought to be involved. I'm surprised they haven't gotten themselves thrown in prison yet, to be honest," Minerva replied finally, voice tight as she thought especially about young Harry and Neville and their parents. Then, as an afterthought, added, "I don't suppose it's at all legal, is it Albus?"

"Not by any stretch of the imagination," Albus answered honestly. "And you know the lot of them so well as I, clearly, and they've all been arrested innumerable times. But they're dedicated. You said it yourself, Kitty, they are a passionate group. And if we're going to be getting technical I hardly say that Riddle is renown for his embracing of rules and regulations."

"Indeed. When put that way, I'm surprised they haven't gotten themselves _killed_ ," Minerva replied, her steady voice wavering at the end and giving away her emotion. "They're only children. Why must they get themselves into these situations?"

"Unfortunately children become adults who are very capable of making their own decisions. Whether good or bad we can't always say, I'd wager." Albus tightened his grip slightly around Minerva's shoulders. "You know I would never ask you to become involved in something I didn't feel was just."

"Oh, of course I know that. And you know very well that I'll gladly involve myself," Minerva replied, leaning into his embrace. "They won't thank you for it, of course. I certainly doubt any of them will dare smoke a breath of any illegal substance with me in the room. What's the organization called, by the way?"

"The Order of Weed, ironically," Albus said with a laugh.

The corners of Minerva's lips turned up at that, and she leaned her head onto Albus' shoulder. "I suppose, in that case, I shall have to get used to a bunch of young hippies just like I've gotten used to this old one."

After a short moment of mental calculations, Minerva came to the conclusion that if Albus reached for the fruit platter for her, neither of them would have to shift out of the rather comfortable position they were in. So, mind made up, she ended the conversation with, "We're neglecting our brandy and fruit duties, you realize."

"I suppose we are," Albus replied. "Although I do believe that the fruit and brandy was just a clever ruse to use me as pillow."

"Brandied Fruit Day is actually today's holiday," she informed him lazily, letting one arm curl comfortably around his waist. "You can find anything on the internet, though it's a bit like searching for a needle in a haystack. However, the pillow aspect is certainly a bonus."

Albus kissed the top of her head gently. Lazy moments like this, when it was just the two of them... it was the best part of his day, most of the time. He could take pride in being one of the top educators in the country, and for aiding others in something they believed in, but in the long run? It was moments like these, with Minerva, when he'd felt he'd accomplished the most. If you had no one to love in your life, and no one to love you, what sort of existence did you have, really?

"We should go away again next summer," he said thoughtfully.

"I agree. Portugal was beautiful," she replied. The trip hadn't been overly long, but it had been wonderful. Portugal was one of the most beautiful places she'd ever been. And there had been a young American couple in one of the hostels they'd stayed in that had been absolutely unable to understand how 'old farts' like Albus and Minerva could love one another for so long without marrying. Albus had quite thoroughly scared them away with his proclamation that they had a few hundred children between them, and Minerva hadn't bothered to mention that none were biological.

Marriage, Minerva thought, was a bit of a farce. While she certainly considered herself Christian in the sense that she believed in a God and tried to hold herself to a certain standard of behaviour, she disagreed with the Church as an institution rather frequently. While she didn't have any intention of marrying so late in her life, she would most definitely never do so until all people who wished to get married legally could--and everywhere.

Besides, Minerva was getting old, and if loving a man without a ring on her finger made her happy, then she was damn well going to do as she pleased. Life was too short for unnecessary complications.

"You don't mind if I spend the night, do you Albus?" she asked, though she was certain she didn't need to. He never minded.

"I never have minded, and I never will," Albus answered. Softly he added, "And I love you, Kitty."

"I love you too, Albus," she said happily.

This was what life was. She didn't know how anyone could want anything more than love.

***

**October 21st, 2006**

"Oi, cunt!" a kid shouted just as Fabian and Gideon entered the bakery.

Fabian was confused for a second before he spotted another kid turn and make for the door. Of course, Gideon and Fabian were currently standing in it, and neither of them made to move. The boy looked around wildly and then bolted for another door at the other end of the store and behind a table. Idiot, it was probably locked. It obviously wasn't used.

The first kid, the one who'd shouted, launched himself over the counter and then over a table, tackling the presumed shoplifter hard into a chair. Both lay panting on the ground for a moment before the first boy began to speak.

"You li'l prick, what d'you fink you're doin', eh?" he spat, his cockney accent thick and rough. "Tryin' ta steal from me! I don' bloody well fink so!"

Gideon exchanged a look with his brother just as another man appeared behind the counter; a man who, if he'd only had a beard on his face, would be an exact replica of Albus Dumbledore.

"Mung," he said, presumably to the over-eager boy wearing the apron. "Get off him now. You were in his place a few months ago, don't forget."

"Told you ta call me Dung," the kid said, getting up reluctantly and kicking the other boy sharply in the shins in the process. "'N I was never in 'is place, Abe. That li'l shite's got money, he just don' want ta spend it here. Prick."

"Abe?" Fabian piped up, taking a few steps further into the store. "As in Aberforth Dumbledore?"

"I'll call you whatever I like," Aberforth said to Mundungus before turning quizzically to face Fabian and Gideon. "That depends. I might be. Who wants to know?"

"Ah, Albus sent us," Gideon said, he and Fabian approaching the counter. "You might call us business partners and he said you might be interested in our company."

"'E's got 'is own business ta take care of," Dung piped up. "And I'm Mundungus Fletcher. 'Is current business partner." At an amused look from Abe, Dung grinned brightly and amended, "Okay, maybe I'm 'is business partner in trainin'."

"Don't worry, we have no intention of taking the man out of the apron," Fabian said with a grin, only barely restraining himself from making some ridiculous, off colour joke about bakeries and perfect buns and men with them, even though he didn't currently see any in the area. "We'd like to talk to you though, if you're able to spare us a few minutes."

When no one was looking, the shoplifter that Mundungus had tried to tackle gathered up the salvageable food from the ground and managed to get out of the door before Mundungus noticed him again.

"Oh leave it alone, Mung," Aberforth said dismissively, waving his hand. "And take the counter, will you? I'll speak to these young men in my office."

Smiling wryly at Fabian, Gideon said, "I haven't been called a 'young man' in about three years."

"Come on, you old geezer," Fabian said to Gid and then nodded as professionally as he knew how at Aberforth, the action incongruous with the grin still brightening his face. He flipped his wrist in a sweeping sort of motion and said grandly, "Lead the way."

Aberforth did, taking them behind the counter, in the back and into a small, relatively cramped room. "It's not meant for more than two people," he said apologetically.

"No worries," Gideon said, leaning against the wall so his brother could sit down.

"Now, a business with Albus, is it?" Aberforth inquired. "Do tell."

Fabian perched himself in the chair Gideon had left him and crossed one leg over the other, looking up at Abe with an enthusiastic expression. He spoke with feeling, his voice both proud and fervent. "It won't make you any money, and many would say it's more trouble than it's worth. It's gotten us arrested, beaten up, attacked, and vandalized on more than one occasion, and we have reason to believe things might be about to get a whole lot worse. It's time-consuming, tiring, and often uncomfortable. It is our life's devotion, and Albus has supported us in it for seven years. Now I'll be the first to admit that Gideon is usually the one that lets out with the inspiring speeches, as he's got quite a knack for them, so I'll let him take over to tell you exactly what _it_ is. Gideon?"

"T.M. Riddle," Gideon said simply, and then paused, allowing the name to register with Aberforth. "Our little society is pain in his side and we're convinced he's looking to take us out, one by one. Our names have slipped to the public, and he already knows everything there is to know about us. But we want to capitalize on this. We want to make the best of it before it's too late to do anything else, basically. If we have to go out, we're going out with a bang, and we need all the help we can get when it comes to that antagonizing, self-centred bastard."

"We can't guarantee your safety, physical, legal, or otherwise, but we assure you, while we may be passionate, we are _not_ stupid. We take all the precautions we can to keep our members as safe as possible. We take this seriously. So I guess the question is, was your brother right? Are you interested in helping us out?" Fabian asked, leaning back to wait for a response.

Aberforth clucked his tongue. "Well. It seems a noble enough cause, of course. Riddle's head is so far up his arse now that he's just shitting out one bad idea after the other. But the way you put it... you expect attempts on your lives then?"

"On ours, yes," Gideon said, honestly. "And on our core members. Those that have been around for years. You... you we can keep away from the spotlight because, like Fabian said, we're not stupid."

"We would never ask people to get involved in something we think is about to blow. Right now, all of our information points to just the core members being targets. If something else were to come to our attention, we would deal with that accordingly," Fabian said. "We're not asking you to risk your life. We're just asking for a little support, a little time, and a little bit of help."

Aberforth nodded absently. "Right. So I'll remain anonymous, and get to kick this bloke in his metaphorical balls?"

"That's right," Gideon replied.

"Then I'm in."

"Brilliant," Gid and Fay said in unison.

Chuckling, Fabian shook his head and stood up, held one hand out to shake, and chirped, "Fabulous. Welcome to the Order of Weed."

Aberforth stood as well, taking Fabian's hand in his and shaking warmly. "A contact card, then," he said, and pulled one out of his pocket, handing it to Fabian before taking and shaking Gideon's hand. "Whenever you need me, I'll make time," he assured them both, smiling.

"Oi, count me in too, ya bastards," Dung called from just beyond the office.

Fabian grinned at Gid and then turned to Aberforth. "How old is he? And where on earth did you find him?"

"He wasn't long on the streets when I came across him," Aberforth said fondly. Mundungus had become quite a son to him in the last six months. "He tried to hold me up with a plastic water pistol, and I offered him a place to stay, a job, and three cooked meals a day. And he's 14."

"Why was he on the streets?" Gideon asked.

"His father beat the piss out of him. Alcoholic. And his mother wasn't the brightest crayon in the box, wouldn't leave the bastard, and so Mung just left on his own." Aberforth shrugged. "He's better off now, at any rate."

"That's quite a story," Fabian said thoughtfully. "You sound like a good man, Aberforth. I'm glad you've agreed to join up. But unfortunately, Mundungus--that's his full name, right? Mundungus?--is a bit too young."

"Tha's total bollocks!" Dung shouted, as he rang through one of their regulars. The bearded old man grinned toothily at him, slid some change across the counter, and then sat down at a table to eat his mincemeat pie, not even blinking at Dung's outburst. Opening the door to the office, Dung stuck his head in and added vehemently, "I'm ol' enough t'do wha'ever I please, thank ya very much, and I fink I'll join your ruddy group. Tell them I can join, Abe."

"Now, now, Mung," Aberforth said, trying not to smile. "If they say you're too young then you're too young."

"Total. Bollocks," Dung sneered through impressively crooked teeth, slamming the door hard enough to rattle the glass and going back to the till. "We're almost out of blueberry scones. Hope those sods aren' planning on stayin' long. There's work t'be done."

"What a charmer," Fay said casually before turning to look at Aberforth seriously. "Look, we didn't mean to upset him, but it's a liability thing. For us and for the other members. Our youngest is 16, and she's sort of a special case. We don't intend to let anyone under 18 in anymore. It's just safer. We're willing to face a lot of things, but devastated parents aren't one of them."

"Understandable. I'm surprised you let the younger one stay on, then," Aberforth commented. "She must be even more head-driven than Mundungus."

Gideon chuckled. "You could say that."

"Yeah, you could _definitely_ say that," Fabian replied, and then patted the pocket he'd slipped Aberforth's contact information into. "We'll get in touch soon about a meeting. We ought to get going now though. Take care, won't you Aberforth? And thank you."

"Take care yourselves. Seems you need to," Aberforth said. "And you're welcome. I'll be seeing you soon."

***

**Later That Day**

" _Gideon_ ," Hestia said, her voice a little warning. "We didn't come here so you could _brood_. You're being a wet blanket."

"Go dance with Fabian and Caradoc if you want to dance so bad," Gideon replied stubbornly. "I'm not getting in the middle of a mosh pit. I'll look like a tart."

"And now you're acting like one!" Hestia snapped. "We're here for a good time, Gid, and no one but me, you brother and Caradoc are going to notice your horrid dancing skills."

"Gideon!" Fabian called loudly, his voice barely carrying over the noise even though he was only a few feet away, dancing at the edge of the crowd as he and Caradoc waited for Gideon and Hestia. He was smiling brightly and his cheeks were pink. They were all high as kites, but only on weed. Fabian didn't trust any other drugs, not after Gideon had broken both his legs after taking ecstasy. "Gideon, come dance, brother!"

"Bugger off!" Gideon called back, although he was smiling a little bit.

"C'mon Gid," Hestia said, practically pleading. "Who's it going to hurt, huh? Please? Dance with me?"

Gideon sighed and rolled his eyes, knowing he couldn't say no now that she'd pulled the cute sad puppy face. He had to have some sort of prince charming complex or something; all any girl he was seeing had to do was bat her eyelashes and ask nicely and Gideon fell for it hook, line, and sinker. There had to be a law against baiting your boyfriend with full lips, and sexy eyes and...

Well if Gideon kept thinking like that he really _wouldn't_ be able to dance.

"Fine," he muttered, and she squealed excitedly, grabbing his hand and pulling him toward Fabian and Caradoc. She started dancing immediately, and Gideon _tried_ to fall in step with her but he was absolutely rubbish. Like he'd _told_ her he would be. Hestia giggled, but kept on dancing.

"Don't worry, mate," Caradoc called, grinning. He too was dancing like he had two left feet. "We can't all be fucking Fred and Ginger, eh?" he said, gesturing to Fabian and Hestia.

"Just lighten up and enjoy it, Gid. Like this," Fay said, and then grabbed Hestia for a moment, twirling her around dramatically and swivelling his hips as best he knew to show off his dancing skills. The dance moves might possibly have been a little too indecent for any other bloke to use while dancing with his brother's girlfriend, but Fabian took certain liberties on account of how completely gay everyone knew he was. It wasn't as though he could be accused of flirting, and Hestia really was a good dancer.

After a moment, Fabian threw his head back and laughed, returning to Caradoc and grabbing his boyfriend by the hips to pull him close. Fabian leaned in and kissed Cara, assuring him aloud, "Don't worry, Cara. I'd rather dance with you any day."

The nice thing about raves, Fabian thought, was that anyone could do whatever they wanted to do. Sure, nearly everyone was messed up on _something_ , but there weren't any rules. People were making out all over the place--some doing far more than just kissing--and no one cared.

Hestia shimmied closer to Gideon and wrapped her arms around his neck smiling. "It's not too hard," she said, quirking an eyebrow as _his_ arms slinked comfortably around her waist. "You danced with me at the last Hobbled Gordon's concert," she reminded him. "No more excuses."

Just as the two couples were getting comfortable and starting to slowly work their way closer to the music, a man in his mid to late twenties appeared, with a huge, grotesque scar going all the way across his face, over one eye, his nose, and ending at the corner of his top lip. He was rambling something, though his voice was so slurred it was almost impossible to make out the words.

"..ruin the bloody world, le' me tell _you_ " the man shouted, finally saying something understandable. "It's a conspiracy! That's... it... he's brainwashing the chil'ren. He... YOU!"

"Er, me?" Fabian asked, as the slightly crazy man was pointing dramatically at him and swaying on his feet.

"Yesh, you. Do you know 'bout the conspir'cy?"

"Ah..." Fabian started, smiling a little nervously. He wasn't afraid of the man. He was obviously drunk enough that it would only be a matter of pushing him over to stop a fight, but crazy people were unpredictable.

"'Course he don't Alastor, _fuck_ ," a woman said, trailing behind him with a slight limp. Her hair was skewed all over the place, and she was wearing a cat printed cardigan and her bedroom slippers. "None o' these youngsters got a fuckin' clue!" She put a hand on the crazy man's shoulder and shook her head dramatically. "Fuckin' re-dick-u-lous!"

"Then they should know, Figgy! They don't know anything!" Alastor said, speaking so vehemently that Fabian took a step back to avoid spittle. "He's using clothes! Clothes! To brainwash... to... He... stopped. Stopped! Has to be stopped. Clothes! Do you understand?"

At that, the man--Alastor, apparently--reeled forward and grabbed Gideon by the front of his shirt, looking up at him with wild eyes as he whispered, "He's using clothes to brainwash the chil'ren."

Gideon wondered mildly if perhaps this was a drug-induced hallucination and grabbed Alastor's hands, forcing the other man to let go of his shirt. "Who do you mean, old man?" he asked. "Riddle?"

"O' course the fuck he means Riddle!" the woman called Figgy interjected grandly. "You buggering fucks listen to Mad-Eye. Fuckin' Mad-Eye Moody knows what he's fuckin' talkin' 'bout."

Caradoc and Hestia took a step back from the two crazy people, looking at each other sceptically.

"Ah, well!" Fabian said, brightening. "In that case, we certainly _do_ know about the conspiracy. However, we would much prefer to talk about it when you're both sober, as right now, we are dancing. Very, very important task, dancing. Gid? Give the woman a card."

Gideon gave Fabian a look that clearly said _Why the fuck would I give crazies our contact info_?, but did as he was told anyhow, reaching for his wallet and pulling out a business card, handing it to Figgy, mumbling all the way.

"They knows about the conspir'cy, Mad-Eye!" Figgy said in a stage whisper. "Maybe they ain't stupid kids after all."

"Don't lose that. And don't call until you've sobered up. In fact, better make it a few days from now," Fabian instructed wryly, wrinkling his nose. Who _knew_ what these coots were on. Hopefully something strong, though, or Fabian had just recruited a couple of head cases. "Now, ah. Best be on your way. I think that fellow way over there would like to know about the conspiracy."

Fabian didn't feel the least bit guilty as he pointed out a burly, hairy old hippie sitting against the tree. He'd wandered by the man before, and he'd been talking to himself. Fabian thought the hippie and these people (were they really named Mad-Eye and Figgy? Who was Alastor then?) would get along famously.

Apparently, Mad-Eye hadn't heard a word Fabian had said and just stared at Figgy in awe. "They know. Hairy balls, they _know_!"

"Fuck, Mad-Eye, we gots a fuckin' mission, c'mon," Figgy said and grabbed the bloke by his shirt, pulling him with a purpose (albeit a stumbling, uncoordinated and inebriated purpose) toward the hairy man Fabian had pointed out.

Fay watched them leave, and then turned to offer Gideon a smile. "What? They're a little bats, but we _are_ recruiting! And who knows. Without the drugs, they might be accountants."

Gideon snorted as Hestia said, "You don't see many accountants with slippers shaped like cats."

Watching Mad-Eye and Figgy interrogate the confused old hippie, Caradoc said, "Fay, how do you manage to attract the people who're completely out of their trees?"

"Special talent," Fabian said with a teasing grin. "Worked on you, didn't it?"

"Think they'll call, Gid?" Hestia asked with a smirk, pulling him toward her and starting him dancing again. She wasn't about to let an interruption by two mad old nonces ruin their high, nor their evening.

Gideon shrugged. "Beats me," he said. "God only knows what they're on; they might not even remember being here once they sober up."

"I think they will," Fabian said. "And five pounds says one of them is an accountant."


	7. Alternative Girlfriend (October 22nd, 2006)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Where Hestia makes a number of bad decisions, Sirius becomes a secret keeper, and Aidan is farmboy with a heart.

Hestia leaned against the doorframe of the small washroom, watching as Marjorie vomitted whatever was left in her stomach into the toilet. She didn't want to seem too eager (it was only the farm report after all) but the chance to cover for Marjorie in the studio would be a fantastic opportunity for Hestia to _finally_ get her foot in the door at this stupid place. All she needed was a little experience, and she'd been working summers at the desk for Salcombe Radio since her first year at East Portlemouth, and _still_ no one had let her work the controls for a show. She'd learned, sure--they all had to, for moments like these when the regulars were otherwise indisposed--but the station manager's excuse was always the same. _She was too young_.

Hestia knew that was bullshit. It was only because she wouldn't sleep with Greg and _certainly_ wasn't going to now that she was with Gideon, not that she would've in the first place, because he was an absolute skeezebag.

"It's not a big deal," she said airily, trying to sound nonchalant. "I know how. It's not as though I'll burn the place down or anything."

"I've never been this hungover in my life," Marjorie groaned, her voice echoing out of the toilet bowl she was currently hanging her head in. "If Greg says anything to you, just tell him to..."

The rest of the sentence was cut off as Marjorie began to heave again, coughing up very few liquids. She'd puked so much there was hardly anything left in her stomach.

"I'll work it out with him. Just go, before I get fired for creating dead air time or something," Marjorie croaked after catching her breath for a moment. "And thanks, Hestia."

Hestia smiled slightly. "You're welcome, love." She was more than well acquainted with her own toilet bowl, so Hestia could sympathize with Marjorie's current condition. More than once she'd stumbled into work with a killer hangover. "And you should probably go home before Greg sees you."

***

"About time, Marj," Aidan called as soon as he saw the door in the control room open. He'd been nervously preparing himself in case he had to do it all on his own, but he was certainly glad she'd shown up. "We only have... oh, you're not Marj. Hello."

"Hi," Hestia answered breezily as she grabbed a set of headphones off of the panel and then smiled at him. "You're Aidan, right? Lynch? One of Sirius' friends?"

"That is correct. Aidan Lynch, voice of the farm report and resident farm boy at your service. Pleasure," Aidan replied brightly. He recognized the girl. What was her name? It was after a goddess, he knew that much. Hero? Hera? Hestia! Hestia, that was it. He remembered Hestia. He'd met her once, though he doubted she remembered meeting him. She'd been tanked, and he and his friends had taken off before she'd really noticed them, leaving Sirius and Remus to deal with the emotional drunk girl. He couldn't help but smile fondly at the memory.

"I wish we had more time to chat, but we're about to go on air. Where's Marjorie?"

"Heaving up in the loo," Hestia explained. "Hangover. Go on then, I know what I'm doing. And I'm Hestia, by the way, Hestia Jones."

"That's a beautiful name, Hestia Jones," Aidan replied, and sent a quick wink her way before hurriedly putting on his own headphones and swivelling in his chair to face his mic. Just in time, too, as the 'on air' light had just turned on.

"Well, good morning, ladies and gents. It's Aidan Lynch here with the weekly farm report," Aidan said brightly. "As you all know, harvest time is just starting to draw to a close once again, especially because of that cold snap in the beginning of October that had all us farmers working a little harder a little earlier to get everything out of the ground before it could be frost damaged. Now that all the food's all indoors, the time for selling, canning, freezing, and drying has come! There is a sale on at Shelder's Market on their wide mouth mason jars, so keep a lookout for that, ladies. Meanwhile, the men ought to be out in the fields planting a nice crop of fast growing winter rye. There are five, ten, and fifty pound bags of it available for a nice price at the Farmer's Helper on Benson Avenue."

Hestia giggled to herself in the booth, keeping her eyes on the levels. What was Greg playing at, putting Aidan on the farm report? The boy obviously had a voice _made_ for radio and it would probably be far more profitable for the station to have him on in the afternoon, or to give him some sort of age appropriate segment. If he was the same age as Sirius that made him a year older than her; surely he could be doing better things?

Noticing Hestia laughing, Aidan grinned at her and leaned back in his chair, trying to exude confidence. "And for those wanting to get into the Halloween spirit, the Callowman's are selling all sorts of handsome looking pumpkins right off their farm. They've got teeny tiny little ones and ones that you could hollow out and roll home in they're so big. And while we're on the topic, Betsy Callowman is taking early orders for Christmas pies, should anyone want any farm fresh, home baked, organic desserts for their holiday season. Christmas is, after all, only _two measly months away_."

Just as Aidan rolled his eyes at Hestia to suggest he thought Mrs. Callowman was crazy for insisting he advertise so early for her Christmas pies, he lost his balance on his tilted back chair and crashed to the ground. Thankfully, it didn't make as much noise as it could have, and he didn't break anything, so he popped his head up as close to the mic as he could reach from his position on the ground tangled in his chair and managed to speak through his laughter.

"And I'll be right back with you after this short commercial break to let you know more about the produce specials you can expect to see at the flea market next Saturday, and Sunday after church."

Hestia had to bite her lip to keep from snorting at him. Either he was trying to impress her, or incredibly clumsy, and despite the fact that Hestia had a perfectly good man who'd shown her just how much he liked having her for a girlfriend twice the night before, it was still nice to see that other boys showed interest. Other boys her age, that was. She'd begun to think that she was like sloppy seconds. Gideon told her otherwise, of course, and while Gideon understood a lot of things about broken hearts and the wounds of love, all that, Hestia didn't think he'd ever really understand how to give Hestia exactly what she wanted. Or needed, for that matter.

God. Emmeline would smack her upside the head if she could hear Hestia's brain right now.

Aidan came into the control room then as the commercials started playing; three or four minutes of local advertising. "Nicely done," Hestia commented. "Very suave. Lucky for you this isn't television."

"No kidding, Christ," Aidan said, blushing. He wasn't usually very clumsy, nor was he really all that easily embarrassed. He did tend to make a fool out of himself when he was trying too hard, though. Maybe that was why Greg had made sure no one but Marjorie worked with him. She wasn't all that old, exactly, but she was in her early thirties and not Aidan's type. (He wasn't trying to be mean, but he wasn't sure Marjorie was really _anyone's_ type. Poor Marjorie.) Offering Hestia a sheepish smile, he stuffed his hands in his pockets and asked optimistically, "So. Do you think anyone noticed?"

Hestia arched her eyebrows. "Right. Because the six people that tune into the _farm report_ aren't in dire need of hearing aids," she said. "I think you're fine."

"Good. Great. It's sort of your fault, you know. I have this habit of making an arse of myself in front of pretty girls, so," Aidan said. "I'm only on the ruddy farm report because Greg hates the idea of anyone younger than him having a chance at being more successful than him, so I don't much mind if I bollocks it up."

Hestia blushed at his pretty girls comment and didn't bother to inform him that she was currently attached. "Greg's a bloody pillock. You know I've been working the desk now for a little over three years? I did the stupid course and whatever, to learn how to work the controls, and bugger if he'll let me do anything but answer the damn phone."

"Wouldn't sleep with him, right?" Aidan asked, schooling his face into a serious expression. "I know exactly how that goes. He's tried to get in my pants loads of times."

Hestia couldn't help it. She burst into a fit of giggles and snorts, her face burning bright red. She managed, however, short of breath to say, "On air- like now," before laughing again.

"Christ," Aidan said, heading into the broadcast room. She was right. The timer was counting down seconds, and it was in the single digits. "Look, let's go for drinks after. Get to know each other a bit better. We can rag on Greg together, and I can tell you all about produce!"

Hestia nodded agreeably, and then cued him in.

"And we're back! Now. I have just the most _exciting_ news for you lot. The Cortons are bringing a whole _truckload_ of their county famous carrots to Saturday's flea market. And get this, they're bringing the juicer and offering a free cup of carrot juice with every purchase ten pounds or more..."

***

"No, no. It's on me," Aidan said as they walked into the noisy pub. "Go grab a seat, I'll bring us some beer and chips. Unless you want a real lunch. They do pretty good burgers here."

Hestia shook her head. "Nah, chips are fine. I'm not that hungry," she replied, heading for a table and looking around wildly for Sirius, _praying_ to God that he wasn't working tonight.

Sirius was wiping down glasses at the bar when he noticed Hestia. He waved, and he grinned as she approached him, and he looked around the room expecting to see her usual entourage of Gideon, Fabian and Caradoc. "Wotcher, Hes," he said. "Where're the boys?"

"I haven't the faintest," she replied, leaning across the bar. "Actually, I was hoping you wouldn't be here, but since you are, I need a favour. I'm sort of here with a mate of yours. You won't tell Gideon, will you?"

Sirius raised his eyebrows. "Define 'here with a mate of mine.' Is it in the 'I plan on shagging him' sense, or the 'drinks after work' sense, but you're thinking of his well-being and don't want Gideon to turn his face into mince meat?"

"It's both. And it's Aidan Lynch, for the record," Hestia said honestly. "And I don't know how he'd react either, so if you didn't tell him I was seeing Gideon, that'd be a help too."

Sirius couldn't help it. He laughed. "You're something else, Hes," he said. "Fine. I'll keep my mouth shut but don't come crying to me when the shit hits the fan."

"Yeah, yeah," Hestia replied. "You're a love, thanks. Ta."

Ruffling Sirius' hair, Hestia cheerily made her way to a booth at the back, waiting for Aidan to find her with drinks and chips. It felt nice to be pursued again. With Gideon, she'd done all the pursuing, and Aidan was a breath of fresh air. And he looked adorable carrying two full drinks in one hand and trying to stuff his wallet back into his back pocket as he approached the table Hestia had chosen.

"A mug for you, a mug for me, and fresh crisps on the way as soon as they're done," Aidan said, sitting down across from her and smiling widely. "I see you decided not to pick any of the tables that had movable chairs. Seems I've made an impression on you, at the very least."

Hestia smiled coyly. "While I don't doubt you'd fancy seeing me on my back I'd much rather stay seated for now, Aidan."

"Oh, well. At least for now then," Aidan agreed, though he was blushing again. He generally wasn't used to girls being so forward, nor was it usually a turn on for him, but there was just something about Hestia. "So, uh. We've worked together for ages now, technically, and I know frightfully little about you. This is a problem that must be fixed."

"Well," Hestia said, picking up her mug and taking a drink before speaking again. "What do you want to know?"

"Everything," Aidan said eagerly after taking his own swig of beer. "Start with favourites. Colour, food, pastime, dance move, television show, type of electronic device, whatever."

"Um, purple, my mum's dumplings, dancing, the robot--which I'm quite good at, by the way--I don't watch the telly if I can help it, and I quite fancy the toaster," Hestia rhymed off cheerfully. "And, for the record, I've lived in Salcombe all my life, you might remember me as the messy girl in overalls who insisted on playing footie with the boys, and I went to East Portlemouth with Siri." Hestia didn't bother to tack on that she'd went _with_ him. Aidan probably knew that anyhow.

"Yeah, I remember you," Aidan replied. As a kid, sure, that too. He hadn't put two and two together before--he hadn't really paid her much attention when they were kids and he hadn't seen her in years, it seemed, since she went to the prep school and he stayed in public school--but once he thought about it, he remembered meeting Hestia a few times many years ago. Most clearly, though, he remembered that time a few months ago that Hestia had shown up to this very bar trashed as all hell and throwing herself at Sirius. "And you know, I'm a terrible dancer. Oh, unless you count line dancing. I only learned in the interest of self-preservation, though. The last three weddings in my family have had the party afterwards held in a barn."

"You're quite the cowboy, aren't you?" Hestia commented, the smile she'd been wearing since that morning growing wider. He was _quite_ different from other boys she'd dated. Or was currently supposed to be dating exclusively. "And I'm sure you can dance. Anyone can dance."

Leaning forward, Aidan confessed in secretive tones, "All right, okay. You can't tell anyone, but I _have_ been taught to waltz." Wearing a wide grin himself, Aidan hoped the smile she had on was a good sort of smile, and not a laughing-at-him sort of smile.

Just then, Sirius arrived with their chips.

"Hey mate," Aidan greeted him. "I believe you know Hestia, yeah?"

"Of course I know Hes," Sirius announced, setting the plate on the table. "She's my best girl, aren't you, love?" His eyes were twinkling and full of mischief. If he was going to have to play secret keeper he was going to have fun torturing Hestia with it.

"Always," Hestia said back.

"You know, I might possibly be worried about that for one second, except that I happen to know that you'd rather string yourself up by your own bollocks than do something like that to Remus," Aidan said.

He'd only met Sirius' boyfriend once, but it had been enough for him to see the way Sirius looked at the bloke. While Aidan was probably the most conservative of Sirius' friends, he had, surprisingly, taken to Remus just as quickly as the others. Aidan figured who Sirius shagged was his own business.

Unless that happened to include Hestia, in which case it became Aidan's business. He knew Sirius and Hestia had hooked up in the past, but they certainly weren't now, Aidan was almost positive. Sirius was capable of plenty of things, but everyone knew he was bloody smitten with Remus. That meant Aidan still had a shot with Hestia.

"You've got me there, Lynch," Sirius said with a shrug. "I guess she's all _yours_." With emphasis on 'yours' he gave Hestia a pointed look before turning back toward the bar.

Hestia brushed off Sirius' obvious attempts to remind her that what she was doing was WRONG, very WRONG and focussed instead on Aidan who (if his 'I might be worried' comment was any indication) seemed to like her quite a lot.

Aidan popped a chip into his mouth and tried not to blush (again) over Sirius' comment. "So, Hestia. You ever been horseback riding?"

"When I was younger," Hestia answered, taking a chip herself. "But not for quite a while, no. Why?"

"Well, we've got a couple of horses. Maybe next weekend when I'm in town again I could take you on a trail ride or something. If you want. You already know the harvest season has just ended. We've got all sorts of fresh fruit and vegetables I could pack to snack along the way," he said, wincing internally at how desperate he sounded. Why was he asking now? Wasn't it totally taboo to ask for a second date before the first was even finished? Not that this was really a date. Not that Aidan was already starting to be stupid about Hestia when he hardly even knew her.

In a bid to save face, he added, "Just a suggestion."

By the time he'd finished speaking Hestia was practically beaming at him. "I'd love to," she said, softly, but then couldn't resist tacking on, "You're lucky you're cute. Otherwise it's rather taboo to ask a girl on a second date when the first one isn't finished yet."

"Oh," Aidan said, and he really _was_ blushing now, so much for trying not to. He couldn't help but grin widely and add, "Thanks. And great. I can't wait. And since you've said I'm cute, I suppose it's okay for me to tell you that you're beautiful."

Hestia tucked her hair behind her ear, her smile as wide as it could get and her face as red as it could get too. "Flatterer," she said, and bit her lip.

"It isn't flattery if it's true," Aidan said, and then thought about it for a moment. "Well, no. I guess it still is flattery, but just honest flattery. I mean. Ask anyone. No one would disagree with me. You are beautiful. And I like it when you blush. It makes me feel less like a tomato."

Hestia laughed and reached out, holding his face in the tips of her fingers. "You're honest, aren't you?"

"Yeah. Well, yeah. I guess," he replied with a tiny little shrug, small enough that it wouldn't have any chance of dislodging her hands from his face. "Terminally honest, someone said once. I think it was Eddie. Said it wasn't that I couldn't lie, just that I never did."

"What do you want to get involved with me for, then?" Hestia asked, a little sadly. The guilt was creeping up on her, but she wasn't about to let Aidan get away. She'd offer him the chance, maybe, but she had a feeling that he'd take her as she was. "I lie. I could be lying to you right now."

"Well," Aidan started, leaning slowly towards her across the table. "The way I figure it, if everyone was exactly like everyone else, life would be boring. And anyway. I sort of like your mystery. Can I kiss you?"

Hestia's heart hadn't felt so full to burst in quite a long time. "Yes," she answered, breathlessly. She hadn't even realized she'd been holding her breath.

So there, in the back booth of a pub, Aidan closed the distance between them, put his elbow in their chips, and kissed her. Maybe she wouldn't notice the elbow-in-chips thing.

Hestia'd never had a kiss like this. It was warm, and soft and she'd swear that her nerves were electrified and that there were little sparks flying between them.

The kiss was good. No. The kiss was _great_. Despite his elbow in their plate of chips. It was so great that Aidan knew he really ought to pull away before he bollixed it up. So, leaning back into his seat, he surreptitiously wiped his elbow on his trousers under the table and grinned at her.

"Wow," he said breathlessly. "I can't believe we've worked together for over a year and not done that yet."

"Me either," Hestia said, beaming. "So, I guess that means we've got some catching up to do."

"Oh, well. Yeah. I guess it does," Aidan said, stammering a little as he thought about how much he would love doing the farm report now that it meant he could steal a few kisses while at the radio station. And of course, he had next weekend to look forward too. Smiling bashfully, he told her, "You know, as mean as it is, I'm really glad Marjorie over-indulged last night. Else I wouldn't have gotten the chance to - " ( _Kiss you? Date you? Possibly get in your pants? No, be a gentleman, Aidan._ ) " - get to know you better."

"The night is still young," Hestia said, cliche as she knew it sounded. "My parents are out of town. We could go back to my place and... get to know one another better." She put on her best seductive face and shifted slightly so her cleavage would be right in his line of sight.

"I... really?" he asked, shocked by her offer. "I mean. Wicked. Only if you're sure, of course. But that would be. I should stop talking. I sound like a bloody child."

"I'm sure," she purred. "And I'm only half-a-block away."

"Well, I mashed the chips when I kissed you anyway," Aidan admitted with a sheepish grin, gesturing at the slightly squashed contents of the dish between them. "So. What are we waiting for?"

Hestia stood and offered him her hand. "I wouldn't know."

They walked toward the door and Hestia felt strangely proud of herself for finding a bloke so honest and down-to-earth as Aidan. He was one in a million, that was for certain, and he was holding her hand and pretending (badly) not to seem too excited. She knew that what was about to happen was much less forgivable by Gideon than a kiss or a drink, or a squashed plate of chips. But she'd made her decision. She cared for Gideon, she really did, but right now, as long as she didn't meet Sirius' gaze on the way out, she knew she wouldn't feel obligated to feel guilty.


	8. Merry Christmas, Baby (December 23rd, 2006)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Where Narcissa is _almost_ sappy, Sirius is all over the place, and Hestia continues weaving her naughty little web.

It was absolutely miraculous, really, but somehow James had managed to carry six glasses of red wine from the kitchen halfway through the living room, not even spilling as he wound his way around guests and presents. The doorbell sounded, just barely heard over the din of the conversation, laughter, and cheery Christmas music, but James was not deterred from his task.

"Pads, get that, will you?" he hollered, spotting Sirius coming out of the washroom.

Without waiting for a response, James continued over to Lily. One of the glasses was for her, one for each Alice and Frank (who only ever drank wine, of any sort of alcohol), one for James himself, obviously, and the last two were for Sturgis Podmore, a friend of James' from work, and his date Elladora Guffy, one of the new interns at the office. Ella was, incidentally, one of Narcissa's friends from school and was the one Sirius had got caught shagging while he was seeing Hestia. Everyone seemed all right with the situation, really, but James thought a bit of soothing liquor best be applied early on.

"And the holiday cheer, also known as wine, has arrived, along with my charming self, of course. Now. What were you lot talking about in my absence? I need to know so I can dole out my quota of witty one-liners."

Sirius reached the door without body-checking too many of the other guests, and pulled it open with a flourish; the cold December air filtered into the warm, overcrowded, body-heated house, and Sirius said, "Welcome to the Potter's Holiday Fiesta! May I take your booze?" before realizing that Narcissa and Professor Malfoy were on the other side of the threshold.

"Hello, Sirius. I know we're late, but there was a family thing tonight that took me a while to wriggle out of," Narcissa said immediately, a ghost of a smile on her face and a few snowflakes sparking prettily from her hair and eyelashes, picking up red and blue and green from the Christmas lights around the door.

It wasn't quite a warm greeting, but then, Narcissa didn't really _do_ warm, even at Christmas time. It was friendly enough, though. Sirius was family, and she'd grown closer with the rest of his little group too over the last few months of school. Being pregnant in a private Christian school was quite a trial, and she'd been glad to have others to go through it with. Not that she'd ever admit it. (Not that she'd ever admit she missed them.)

"I brought Lucy, obviously, and we brought quite an array of alcohol. All quite a lot better than anything you've got in the house, I'm sure," Narcissa continued. "Oh, and happy Christmas."

Sirius grinned. "Happy Christmas to you too, Cissa. Nice to see you Professor Malfoy," he added.

"Christ, Black, I haven't taught you for nearly a year and I'm engaged to your cousin. Surely the 'Professor' prefix is no longer necessary," Lucius said, rolling his eyes. He loaded a basket of liquor into Sirius' arms and then said, "Lucius is more than adequate."

"Too right. And don't you drink all of our champagne. It's real, you know. From the Champagne region of France. Father always has it imported, and I borrowed a few bottles," she instructed firmly. There was only one in the basket, of course. She'd left the other at home for her and Lucius to enjoy another time. "Now get out of the doorway and let us in. It's terribly rude to make us stand out here in the cold, you callous barbarian."

"Come right in Lucius and Narcissa. Would you like me to announce your arrival to everyone as well, your highnesses? Or can you manage well enough on your own?"

"Oi, Sirius, close the fucking door!" Edgar Bones called from near the stairs, Dorcas on his arm. "It's fucking cold!"

"Well, there's hardly anyone here worth announcing it _to_ , is there. No point," Narcissa said, her voice lacking any malice and a small, amused smile on her face. She pushed Sirius out of the way and stepped inside before pulling off her jacket and holding it out to her cousin. "Here. And aside from the expected, do I know anyone here?"

"Ella Guffy's here somewhere," Sirius said, setting the basket of alcohol on the floor. "I think she wants back in my trousers."

Lucius smirked. "You think anything with reproductive organs wants in your trousers, Black."

"And I'm usually right," Sirius replied. "And call me _Sirius_ , darling. I insist."

"Don't be a pest, Sirius. She wants in everyone's trousers. It isn't flattering; it's inevitable. She wants in your trousers too, you know," Narcissa said, smirking at Lucius. "She's a darling girl, of course, but a total trollop."

"She gave me something, that one time," Sirius explained with a grimace. "It cleared up alright, but I wouldn't shag her again for a million quid."

"Don't be a bigger prick than you can help, cousin," Narcissa said promptly, defending Ella in her own Narcissa sort of way. Sirius had never taken her jacket and she'd ended up draping it over a nearby chair. If anyone got anything on it, she'd exact revenge. It was a wool, cashmere blend, and very expensive. Turning and taking Lucius' hand, Narcissa smiling coyly up at him and tugged him towards the crowd. "Come on, Lucy, let's mingle."

As they made their way into the crowd and vaguely towards Elladora, Narcissa and Lucius passed a loud group of obviously drunk people who were laughing from their spot sitting on the stairs.

Aidan Lynch, possibly the most obviously drunk of the obviously drunk group, was attempting to slur out the story of how he met Hestia.

Edgar was looking at Dorcas with his eyebrows raised. He was pretty sure that he'd heard Emmeline talking about Gideon and Hestia doing something together, and he knew that Hestia'd been trying to get into his pants for eons, so this was really surprising to hear. Or comprehend.

"So wait, say that again Lynchy; I think you've had too much to fucking drink, mate," Edgar said, and waved for Sirius to come over just as the front door opened and Gideon and Hestia breezed in together bringing a flurry of snowflakes with them.

Sirius noticed both situations at the same time and almost immediately had a panic attack.

"No, no, no! Oh, well I mean, I prolly have, but just... you have to believe me!" Aidan said laughingly. "We work together, y'know, and one day we jus', we, and I fell off my chair, righ', and then we went to the pub an' then... Sirius! Sirius, you know what I'm talking 'bout!"

Dorcas was on Ed's lap, which had quickly become her favourite place to sit, and giggling at Ed's drunken friend. She'd met Aidan a few times, but this time he was wearing a cowboy hat and she'd found out he lived on a farm. She thought he was hilarious. "You'd better not try to stand up, Aidan. You'll fall right the fuck over again."

Sirius ran a hand through his hair, his mind straining for a solution. He listened to Aidan babble a bit longer, and watched Gideon help Hestia take her coat off, and then saw Remus in the kitchen doorway talking to Greta Catchlove and then something clicked. He was going to hate himself for encouraging Hestia to do this shit, but he had promised and if Sirius was anything he was loyal.

"Remus," he said, "I need you to do me a favour."

Remus paused mid sentence, smiled apologetically at Greta (who he quite liked, especially because her parents owned the sweet shop in town that had not only phenomenal fudge, but also imported some of the best chocolate Remus had ever tasted), and said, "You'll have to excuse me a moment, sorry."

Following Sirius a few steps down the hall, he asked curiously, "Okay, what's going on?"

"I just need you to keep Gideon Prewett occupied for like, five minutes. And possibly away from the conversation Ed and Lynch are having," Sirius said. Realizing that Remus was going to ask questions, and that Sirius would likely tell the truth, he added quickly, "It's a secret surprise thingy. And I need to talk to Hes about it where Gid can't hear."

"All right," Remus agreed easily. Though he'd established at the wedding that champagne was bad, someone--he suspected Sirius--had given him something else that had him quite flushed and relaxed. It was Christmastime, though, and Remus thought it was probably expected that everyone would get drunk. That was beside the point, however. What was the point? Oh, right! "You're up to something, aren't you? Just be good. I wanted to ask Gideon something anyway."

"Fabulous," Sirius said distractedly, and headed toward Gideon and Hestia with Remus on his heels. "Hes! Darling! Might I have a word? Remus here has a question for you Gid, so he'll keep you occupied while I momentarily borrow your lady friend here, heh heh."

"Hey Gideon. I was just wondering if Emmeline had had a chance yet to go take those pictures," Remus asked curiously, remembering talk at a recent Order meeting about Emmeline using her super zoom lens to try and get photos of the inside of the factory through the windows.

"She made one attempt," Gideon answered as Sirius grabbed Hestia by the wrist and then pulled her in the direction of the bathroom. "She's still having a little trouble with the camera. We're going to try again after the New Year."

"Sirius, what the hell?" Hestia said as she followed along after him.

"Oh, okay," Remus said, watching with amusement as Sirius dragged a confused Hestia up the hall.

Sirius pulled Hestia all the way into the bathroom and shut the door behind them. Staring at him like he was crazy, Hestia asked, "Okay, what? What's so important you had to drag me in here to talk to you in a loo?"

"Aidan is piss-loaded on the other side of the room and trying to explain to Ed, Dor, and Davy how you two ended up dating," Sirius said quickly.

"Oh bugger. Oh fuck. Oh buggerfuck," Hestia swore, smacking a hand to her forehead. "Okay. Well. You just have to fix it, is all. You have to. Please."

" _I_ have to fix it? What the FUCK, Hes. I am not your fucking relationship slave, okay? You're lucky I fucking told you he's even here, because I could've just left him to you and Gideon and I'm sure that that'd be a peachy fucking conversation. How much longer are you going to keep this up?"

"I don't know! Sirius, _please_ ," Hestia pleaded. "Look, it's just... I like Gideon, I really do, but I don't know if I'm just his rebound girl, you know? You have no idea how messed up he is right now, and yeah, we're good for each other, but I don't think we're _right_ for each other. Aidan might be right for me, and I don't want to lose that opportunity, but right now is _not_ the right time to talk about that with Gideon. I don't want to hurt either of them, so I have to wait for the _right time_. Do you get it?"

Sirius frowned and shook his head. "You're being a bitch, that's what I understand." Then in a moment of brilliance said, "And I know how to get them out of your hair."

"Oh, thank you, thank you, thank you," Hestia said, sagging back to rest her weight against the bathroom counter. "Tell me."

"No," Sirius said, and left the bathroom.

Back in the midst of the crowd, Sirius made a beeline for Gideon and called, "Gid! Do me a favour since you're here and not intoxicated?"

"What's that?" Gideon asked.

"My mate Aidan is completely out of it. Take him home for me, will you? He's on the Lynch farm, you know the place?"

Hestia stayed in the bathroom a moment, pinching the bridge of her nose. This was such a mess. When she finally followed Sirius out, she only heard the last few words, but she quickly pieced it together and went into a panic.

"No! Sirius, that's not fair. We just got here," Hestia said desperately and gave Sirius a what-the-bloody-hell-do-you-think-you're-doing look.

Gideon raised his eyebrows and said, "It'll only take 15 minutes. I'll be back before you know it, love. Where is this bloke, Sirius?"

"Oi Bones!" Sirius called across the room. "Bring Lynch over here will you?"

"Well h'lo!" Aidan mumbled in Hestia's direction, and tried to lurch over to her, but Edgar caught him and dragged him towards Sirius and Gideon. "Guys, 'm fine. I don' wanna go home. Let's jus' stay here an' party!"

Remus situated himself at Sirius' side and asked softly, " _This_ was your secret surprise thingy?"

"Something like that," Sirius answered with a shrug, and then patted Aidan on the back. "Lynchy, this is Gid. He's driving you home before you upchuck all over Lily's rugs."

"Oh. Okay. Hello," Aidan said, rather agreeably for someone who wanted to _stay here an' party_. He looked, actually, quite suddenly sleepy. "Thanks then, mate. I suppose 'm being a bit of an embarrassment if I'm so drunk I have to go home when you jus' arrived."

Remus cleared his throat to hide a sudden urge to laugh and turned to press his smile into Sirius' shoulder. Aidan was so mannerly, even while drunk, that it seemed to make a funny sort of sense that he'd worry he was embarrassing himself.

Hestia, on the other hand, did not look amused at all. She looked rather pained, but seemed to be half hiding behind Sirius.

Gideon pulled his coat back on and took Aidan's weight from Edgar and onto himself. "C'mon then, mate," he said. "Let's get you home. I'll be back in a bit Hestia, no worries."

"Hestia! I know Hestia. She's sexy, sexy, sexy," Aidan mumbled as he stumbled towards the door with Gideon.

Everyone spread out and back into the party once Gideon got Aidan out the door, and Edgar turned to Sirius with a quizzical look on his face. Hestia had found Emmeline and looked as though she wanted to throw-up, so Edgar thought it safe to ask. "Is Hestia seeing Gideon?"

Sirius frowned. "Yes."

"And is Hestia seeing Lynch too?" Edgar continued.

Sirius nodded. "Yep."

Edgar let out a low whistle. "Wow. And you just sent her two boyfriends off together?"

Sirius nodded again.

Laughing, Edgar commented, "No wonder Hestia looks like she about to implode. Dear God," and then headed back toward Dorcas.

"So the drunk cowboy is in the process of being delivered home?" Dorcas asked, stopping her idle conversation about her clothes with Davy Gudgeon, another of Ed's friends. Currently she was wearing ripped up jeans with red polka dotted leggings underneath and a wife beater along with various necklaces and bracelets. She and Davy had been trying to decide if she was emo because of the leggings, edgy because of the ripped jeans, butch because of the wife beater, or just too lazy to dress nice.

"Yea," Edgar replied. "And you're not going to believe this. Remember how earlier Lynch was going on and on about hooking up with Hestia?"

"I'm sure this is going to be an interesting story, but now that you're here to keep your lady company, I'm going to get another drink," Davy said, getting to his feet and heading for the kitchen.

"Of course I do," Dorcas answered. "The fucker just wouldn't shut the fuck up."

"Turns out Hestia is going out with Gideon, we were right about that," Edgar explained. "But she's fucking around with Aidan too."

"Oh! Naughty girl!" Dorcas said with a snort. "You just know that's going to blow up in her face, and Gideon and Aidan are going to be right in the fucking firing line."

"Yep. And Sirius just got Gideon to drive Lynch home," Edgar said. "And he knows about it."

"Well fuck me," Dorcas said, amazed at the situation. She toyed with the idea of being angry on Gideon and Aidan's behalves, but then just figured it wasn't any of her business. "Kudos to her. They're both pretty fit, after all."

Edgar laughed. "I guess that's one way to look at it," he said. "Anyhow. Enough about who Hestia's fucking. Let's talk about who I _should_ be fucking."

"Oh, do you mean that slutty girl who's chatting with James and Lily and the Longbottoms and that odd looking fellow? She's wearing a pretty short skirt, I bet you she's just fucking gagging for it," Dorcas joked.

Slipping a hand around Dorcas' waist he said, "Nah, I'd rather be fucking the only girl at the party who looks like she picked her outfit out of the laundry basket."

"Oh my. Do you mean me? The only girl not in a dress, perhaps?" Dorcas asked, grinning and leaning into Edgar. "You know, there is a loo just up the hall. We could fuck in there, if you want. Because I do."

"Sounds good to me," Edgar replied with a grin. "Lead the way."

Dorcas grabbed Ed's face and pulled him in for a sloppy kiss before hooking a finger through his belt loops and pulling him towards the bathroom. On their way there, they passed Sirius and Narcissa.

"We're having a quickie in the bathroom," Dorcas declared brightly to Sirius. "See you in a bit!"

"Have fun kids," Sirius called after them, and then turned back to Narcissa and added, "Dor and Ed like fucking a bit more than considered normal."

"Normal is fucking overrated!" Dorcas shouted, her voice only slurring a little, though she was the perfect picture of a drunken partygoer as she had a boy by the belt loop in one hand and a bottle of tequila in the other.

"How unbearably uncouth," Narcissa sniffed as she watched the couple disappear into the bathroom. Never the less, she angled a smile over her shoulder in Lucius' direction. Currently he was talking with Fabian and Caradoc and seemed to be getting on surprisingly well with Narcissa's friends, who were all mostly his ex-students. "Sirius, there's something I suppose I ought to tell you."

"What's that?" Sirius asked. "Pregnant again?"

"No, of course not, don't be daft," Cissa answered swiftly. "Just, look. You're my cousin, so it's family business, and you aren't to tell anyone, do you understand?"

Surprised, Sirius replied, "Sure," and then went quiet.

"Right before my parents got married, Daddy had an affair with a married woman," Narcissa said. "I have an illegitimate half-sister that literally no one knows about aside from me, Father, Mother, the little wretch herself, and obviously the woman who popped her out."

Sirius snorted. "You drunk already Cissa? Because you're spitting out nonsense."

"No, it's true. So it would technically make her your half-cousin. Do they do cousins by halves?" Narcissa queried, and then waved an immaculately manicured hand in front of her face as if to dispel the silly thought. "It doesn't matter. Do you want to know who she is? My half-sister?"

"A hobo you met on the side of the street?" Sirius inquired with a half-amused smile.

"As if I'm related to riff raff like that," Narcissa snapped. "I'm not going to tell you if you don't take me seriously."

"Fine, fine. Go on then," Sirius encouraged. "Who's my half-relative?"

Smiling wickedly, Narcissa took a sip from her glass of champagne and cocked her eyebrows at Sirius dramatically. "Bellatrix Lestrange."

"Bellatrix," Sirius deadpanned. And it clicked. The overwhelming sense of familiarity he got when around her... the hair, the eyes, the haughty expression... "Holy shit. She looks just like Uncle Cygnus!"

"Exactly," Narcissa said, pleased with his response. "But keep it to yourself or else I'll lose all sorts of job security."

Sirius blinked and then smiled wryly. "You _sneak_. You blackmailed her, didn't you?"

"Hold the applause," Narcissa said with a giggle. And _this_ was why she'd told Sirius. Lucius had been very disapproving and worried for her safety, but Sirius would see the beauty in it. "Actually, don't. Go on, tell me how amazing I am."

"Pretty impressive, Cissa," Sirius said. "I'd wondered how you managed it. And let me guess; once you've got a name she's shipping you off to a more prominent agency and cutting ties?"

"Exactly. My father's intense dislike for contraception has secured my entire career," Narcissa said. "I plan on squashing her on the way, if at all possible." In a lower voice, Cissa leaned forward and explained, "You've no idea how devastated mother was when she found out, and Daddy refuses to take that little bitch out of the will. So, I plan to exact just retribution."

"She's just as if not more vindictive than you. I think she'd rather kill you, personally," Sirius said. "I wonder if she knows _we're_ related?"

"You and I? I'm not sure. I can't imagine she much cares about family," Narcissa said, a hard edge coming to her voice. "Do you know, she's known about me my entire life, but I was the one to contact her? And within the month of finding out, might I add. She has no sense of familial loyalty."

Sirius shrugged. "Maybe she just doesn't want to intrude. Not that I can imagine that bitch actually having feelings of any sort. She's an unfeeling, sharp-nailed robot. Like Victoria Beckham."

"And you think _I'm_ drunk?" Narcissa sneered. It was ridiculous, but she'd gotten used to seeing Sirius every day at school. It was nice to catch up.

"Well I've been adding to my system since I came over at three to help set up," Sirius said. "Not to mention that I'm normally referred to as 'Crazy Sirius Black' so I can rather get away with it."

"You're ridiculous. I can't believe we're related sometimes," Cissa said, but it was with a sort of fondness and she was smiling.

"Oh, as though you're _not_ ridiculous, Miss Had a Baby, Caught a Man and Blackmailed her way to a Career," Sirius quipped. "I should start calling you, 'Crazy Narcissa Black'."

"Oh, _please_ ," Narcissa laughed. "Don't. Then we'd actually have something in common besides blood, and how revolting would _that_ be."

"Oh it wouldn't be that bad," Sirius said. "And we have more in common than you might like to think, Cissa _darling_."

"Just what, exactly, do you mean by that?" Narcissa asked, one eyebrow raised in an expression she rather thought of as belonging to the Blacks.

"We both love someone so much we'd do anything not to lose them, for one, although I'd never get myself pregnant on purpose," said Sirius, thoughtfully. "It'd do a number on my figure. We're both manipulative little bitches as far as the traditional definition goes, although you far surpass me in the traditional 'Black' department. Oh, and we're both dreadfully good-looking."

Narcissa tossed her hair over her shoulder and pouted at him. "I'm a model, Sirius. I'm far better looking than you." Snickering a little, Narcissa sobered. "In all seriousness, though, I'm glad we're..." Narcissa stopped mid sentence and made a face. "You know, I think you were right. I am drunk. I was about to say something sickening and sappy. Let's move on, shall we?"

Sirius smiled at her in a pleased sort of way and said, "Right, right. We Blacks don't show emotions."

"Well. It can be one of many family secrets that I'm the teensiest bit fond of you, then," Narcissa said. "You can't tell anyone, though. The only person I like out loud is Lucius, and can you blame me? He's sex on legs. Or, well, you know what I mean."

"Thankfully I don't," Sirius teased. "You want another drink?"

At that, Narcissa tipped up her glass and swallowed the last few mouthfuls all in one go before handing it over to Sirius. "Yes, might as well. I'll be with Lucy when you get back. Come find us."

Sirius took her glass and headed across the room toward the kitchen. He passed Emmeline and Leroy cuddling in a chair in the corner and made kissy noises at them on his way by. "No nookie in the living room now!" he said. "Take a note out of Ed and Dor's book and make use of the hallway loo!"

"I think we'll simply exercise a little self-control and wait until we're in the privacy of our own home, actually," Emmeline said with an easy smile. "Thank you for the suggestion, though."

"Anytime, Em!" Sirius called back to her as he kept walking. "And to each his own!"

Emmeline rolled her eyes and turned her attention back to Leroy and the conversation they'd been having. "So. I think it's that she has slept with Aidan before, she wants to sleep with Aidan now, or she _is_ sleeping with Aidan currently. Which option is most likely, do you think?"

"The latter, likely," Leroy said. "Otherwise I don't think she'd be so edgy if she had or wanted to."

"Yeah, you're probably right," Emmeline said with a sigh. "And I think I'll take this moment to resign forever from my newfound hobby of matchmaking and general life interference."

"Hestia is an anomaly, though. She just has a very intense sexual appetite. Or," Leroy paused, thoughtfully. "Well, maybe she just thought she wanted Gideon, and then when she got him realized he wasn't quite what she was looking for and now she doesn't want to break up with him because she's afraid it'll crush him."

"You could be right, but either way, I honestly don't feel like making her excuses for her," Emmeline said. "I've been best friends with Hestia since, oh, about halfway through my first year at East Portlemouth Prep when I stopped being shocked by her. Now, though, I feel like that familiarity has caused me to see her through rose coloured glasses, and the result of that is going to be another broken heart for Gideon."

Leroy nodded sadly. "That man just can't get a break. And I'm tired of seeing Marlene mope around band practices. She lurks and pouts until Stubby pays her some mind, then she lurks and pouts again."

"Gideon and Marlene were practically made for each other," Emmeline agreed. "I just don't get what's stopping them. I don't think Gideon does either, which is why he hung on for so long. I thought moving on would be best for him, but..." Em trailed off and shook her head, smiling. "You know what? I just really need to stop meddling."

Sighing, Leroy said, "I think in that case you could only do good."

"Oh, don't encourage me. I'm going to get a God complex," Emmeline laughed, then looked up at Leroy and sobered. "Did I tell you, Daddy noticed the ring the other day. He started crying. I should've told him."

"Crying in a happy way, or crying like he's going to beat me with a shovel?" Leroy asked.

"Neither. Crying like he thought he was a failure as a father for not being involved enough in his daughter's life," Emmeline said. "He started going on and on about how when Mum died, he vowed to be the best dad ever, but it was just hard because I looked so much like her. It was really sad. I didn't realize he still missed her so much."

"He's a strong man, your dad," Leroy said.

"And he likes you," Em said softly. "In the end, he was really happy that you and I are going to be together. I think Christmases are just especially rough on him."

"Understandably," Leroy said. "Did you tell him about the tour?"

"Yeah. He was more against that than the engagement," Emmeline said. "I tried to talk him around, but in the end we just agreed it was my life to do with as I please. I wouldn't miss it for the world, Leroy."

"I just wouldn't want to put you and your dad on bad terms. That wouldn't be fair to anyone."

"He loves me and he wants me to be happy. Besides, I'm an adult now. I have to make my own decisions. He understands. He'll come around. I promise," Em assured Leroy. "Don't worry so much about me. I'm tough."

"But I love you. I can't help but worry," Leroy explained.

"I know. I love you too. But it's Christmastime. I'd rather if you were happy with me instead."

The door swung open again then, revealing Stubby Boardman and entourage and a cool gust of wind. Everyone called for them to hurry in and shut the door, but Stubby sauntered as always, tugging Marlene around with his arm around her waist as though she was nothing more than an extension of his hip. Ben and Dale slid in behind them, and as he watched them enter, Leroy was strangely reminded of a mob scene.

Emmeline raised her hand in a wave in Marlene's direction, and Marlene disentangled herself from Stubby, who was heading up to the stage anyway.

Walking up to Em and Leroy, Marlene settled herself in the chair next to them and said in lieu of a greeting, "I think Stubby wants to play right away. Or that was the plan on the way here, anyway. You might be wanted."

The guys had been here earlier, setting up their instruments and a few speakers in the corner, and then they'd all left, save Emmeline and Leroy, to go to various other parties. Apparently the day before Christmas Eve was a popular day for parties.

Leroy rolled his eyes. "You'd think for one day out of the year Stubby would want to take a break and enjoy the booze without showing off." It was probably the most honest thing Leroy had ever said (at least in the presence of anyone other than Emmeline) and he stood a little angrily and went to join the rest of his band mates.

"Uh oh. He and Stubby aren't fighting, are they? Because this is _not_ the right time to be having disagreements," Marlene said with a sigh. "They've got to focus on the band."

Emmeline paused a moment and chose her words carefully before leaning forward and saying clearly, "Marlene, Stubby couldn't be any more focussed on the band if a freak accident melted his hand to his guitar."

"You say that like it's a bad thing," Marlene said. "It's because of dedication like that that they're getting signed."

"You're right. It's great for him and it's great for the band," Emmeline replied. "But how do you feel about it?"

Marlene looked confused. "He hasn't been neglecting me or anything, if that's what you're getting at. He treats me the same as he always has."

"He sure does," Emmeline said. "Come on, Marlene. Let's go get drinks."

Leroy barely nodded at Stubby or the others. He took his bass (which he'd left on the make-shift stage when he'd arrived with Emmeline) and strapped up, frowning; his face was red and he was holding back. It was nothing against the band. He loved playing and he loved what they were doing, but there were days, like today, when it wasn't necessary to play. When they should kick back and enjoy themselves. And it was never what Leroy wanted, it was always what Stubby wanted, and despite his quiet, agreeable demeanour, there were times when Leroy wanted to make the decisions.

"What's up, man?" Stubby said to Leroy as he double-checked all the tuning on his guitar. "You look like you swallowed a jalapeno pepper or something."

"Fuck off, mate," Leroy answered. "Don't push it tonight. Let's just get this over with."

"Get this _over_ with? We're playing our soon to be hit single, man. You should be fucking excited as shit to introduce it to our friends," Stubby said casually, not catching the sharpness of Leroy's tone.

"No. Not even fucking close," Leroy snapped. "I've been putting 150-fucking-percent into this band and recording and everything else since we signed, and I _want a break_. It's _Christmas_ , Stubby! Christ."

"Things aren't going to get any easier! We’re going to be _touring_ , Roy, man," Stubby shouted. "You're going to have to put in 200-fucking-percent then you lazy fuck. Don't complain to me about what a chore it is to play. You should _always_ want to play!"

"Fine! Let's fucking play!" In a completely out of character move, Leroy took centre-stage with a determined expression on his face. "Hey!" he called to everyone. "We're going on tour after the new year, playing our way across Europe! And because you lot are where it's at regardless of where the fuck we end up, here's our first single, and it'll be playing on the radio tomorrow. It's called 'Cold Shower'! Count us in, Ben!"

Ben looked confused for a moment then just screamed, "C-c-c-c-coooooold _shower_ , baby! Brrr!" and counted them in.

Stubby moved to centre stage with Leroy and gave his oldest friend a dirty look as he stepped a step further out and began to sing.

Lily, standing beside James by the kitchen with a drink in her hand, watched the band roar into the new song with surprise. She's never seen Stubby and Leroy fight like that before. They'd had arguments over trivial things, of course, but never something so obviously bothering Leroy that he felt the need to step up and draw attention to himself.

"Wow," she said quietly to James.

"They're not even superstars yet and they're already having problems," James mused. "Oh, look. Gideon's back. Gid! C'mere!"

Gideon shut the door and shook the snow off of his jacket before dumping it on the stairs and walking over to join James and Lily. "Aidan Lynch is a remarkably hard man to navigate in and out of a car. Thankfully his father came out to help me get him in the house. And he wouldn't stop talking about Hestia," he added. "I think he might have a thing for her."

"Ah, well. Forget about him now, and enjoy the party," James said with a smile. "Help yourself to the booze, of course. Oh, and this is Sturgis Podmore. We work together. Sturge, this is Gideon Prewett, a good friend of mine."

"Hello, mate. It's a pleasure," Sturgis said and held out his hand to shake.

"Sturgis! Pleasure indeed, James has told me good things about you," Gideon said. "Hey Fay!" he called to his brother. "Come meet someone!"

Fay, who'd been wondering about the odds of getting Caradoc to dance with him while no one else was dancing, decided his chances were slim anyway and headed for his brother, Caradoc following along. "Hello. I'm Fabian Prewett, the pretty brother, and this is my boyfriend Caradoc. Who might you be?"

Sturgis laughed. "I'm the man who's lost his date. You haven't seen a pretty girl with curly brown hair around here, have you? Named Elladora?" He thought she was probably with Narcissa. Turned out they were old friends. "Anyway, I'm Sturgis, but everyone calls me Sturge. I'm a friend of James' from work."

"He's the one I was telling you guys about," James spoke up. "He refused to accept Vol de Mort ads for a fashion show our company was advertising, claiming they were too hideous to be allowed to go to print."

"Wonderful. Not a fan of Vol de Mort, then?" Gideon asked.

"Are you kidding?" Sturgis said with a grin. "I met him once, you know. He manhandled one of his models right in front of me. I wanted to just hit him."

"Well do we have a proposition for you then," Gideon said. "I don't know how much James has told you, but my brother and I... we run this little group."

"Do you now. What kind of group? I mean, what do you do?" Sturgis asked, leaning forward excitedly. "Is it top secret?"

James laughed. "Sturge is a very enthusiastic person."

"Well, it used to be top secret," Fabian said. "Now, not so much. We got published. We're activists who work together against Riddle, mostly."

"Essentially yes. And we're in a bit of a bind because the bastard knows who our core members are and we're pretty sure he wants to snuff us out," Gideon added. "So, naturally, we're taking on more core members in order to confuse him a bit."

"Ooh, sounds dangerous," Sturgis said. "How effective are you guys? I mean, is it worth the risk?"

"We've managed a few decent things. Gotten a few stores shut down, interrupted a few shows, to name a few," Gideon said.

"Not too shabby, not too shabby at all," Sturgis said thoughtfully. "I spend half my time in London though. Or, you know, it seems anyway. Will that be a problem?"

"Not in the slightest," Gideon replied. "Coincidentally, Riddle spends quite a chunk of his time in London as well. Marlene and Emmeline--they're members as well--are going on tour with the band all over the place." He gestured to The Hobbled Gordons. "They won't be at all performances, and all rest time is spent in London, so we can arrange some things."

"Great! Sounds great. I'm in," Sturgis said. "Do we get badges? Or shirts? Membership cards? I love cards. I collect them."

James chuckled and threw an arm around Sturgis' shoulders. "You prat."

"Hey! I'm technically your superior, you know," Sturgis reminded James laughingly.

"You can make yourself a card if you like," Gideon joked. "Fay and I have our own. The nonce surprised me with them a few years ago at Christmas."

"Oh, I was just joking," Sturgis said, rolling his eyes. "I mean, I like cards. I do. I might make some anyway. 'Sturgis Podmore, activist extraordinaire'."

"Well. Welcome to the Order of Weed, then," Fabian said with a grin. "Do you toke? It's not a requirement or anything. Just, you know. We picked the name a long time ago."

"Not that we don't still toke," Gideon added.

"Because we do," Fabian said.

"Just, not as often. I mean, I'm a dad now. I haven't been high since before Harry was born," James said, and then shook his head. "Wow. It has been a _long_ time."

"I was high a few times when I was kid," Sturgis said, shrugging. "I haven't been since then. Nothing against it, mind. Toke all you like."

Gideon looked at his brother and shook his head. "For some reason, hearing that makes me feel 14 again."

"I miss being that age," Fabian said wistfully. "Life was so much simpler, you know?"

"Simple! Ha! Simple is so overrated," Sturgis said. "Life is supposed to be complicated. It's supposed to be messy. I love messy, personally. Elladora is messy. She's messy and fantastic and it was wonderful meeting all of you, but I'm going to go find my date. My messy, fantastic date." Sturgis started to walk away, and then he whirled back and pulled out his wallet, pulling something out and holding it towards Gideon and Fabian. "Here, have a card. One of my cards. Get in touch about the Order of Weed."

James laughed as Sturgis ambled away. "He's such a card, isn't he?"

"Bad joke, James. Bad," Fabian groaned.

Sturgis spotted a blonde head above the crowd and headed for it. Where Lucius was, Narcissa was, and Ella was probably with Narcissa. As he passed the front door, it opened and a short, stout fellow stepped in out of the cold.

"Bit late, mate, but welcome!" Sturgis said to the man he didn't know as he passed.

"Wh-what? I mean, hello," Peter said. The man was already gone, but he looked in the direction he went in and added, "I know I'm l-late. I know."

Sirius heard Peter's voice and was surprised. He didn't think Pete was going to make it home for the holidays (least he said he wouldn't), and turning around to face his mate he said, "Petey, old boy! We though your boss'd have you in shackles by now!"

"Oh, well. I just drove into town! My s-stuff is still in my car," Peter said. "I h-haven't even been to my p-parents house yet. Happy Christmas, Padfoot."

"Happy Christmas!" Sirius exclaimed and looped an arm around Peter's shoulders with a grin. "So how is old London anyhow? Want a drink?"

"London's g-good. It's good," Peter stammered. "Have you got any spiced cider? I'm r-really cold."

"Yea, just give me a minute," Sirius said, and then trotted off to the kitchen.

"Okay, yeah," Peter said and rubbed his clammy hands on his thighs before struggling out of his jacket and hanging it on the coat rack. He looked around the party, taking stock of who was where. James and Lily in the corner, Gideon and Fabian with them, Frank and Alice by the fireplace, Narcissa and Professor Malfoy by the stage. Stage?

"Hey Pete. Glad you could make it," Remus said warmly, surprising Peter enough to make him jump and squeak. "Sorry. Didn't mean to sneak up on you. How was the drive in?"

"Here we go Pete," Sirius said, returning. "Cider for the city-boy."

"Thanks, Sirius," Pete said, taking the cup and taking a sip. "And the d-drive was good. Fine."

"I can't believe they had you working all day. It's the day before Christmas Eve," Remus said, shaking his head. "Your boss must be a nightmare."

"Oh, well. He is, I g-guess," Pete answered. "How's the party going so f-far?"

"It's had its moments. Stubby and Leroy had a fight, that was interesting," Sirius said. "And Dor and Ed had a fuck or two in the hallway loo."

"Oh. Oh, that's... So how are you both?" Peter asked.

"Oh, I'm great," Remus said with a smile and curled an arm around Sirius' waist. "I love Christmas."

"Me too. I can drink and not be called an alcoholic, and eat as much nosh as I please without being considered a pig. It's fabulous," Sirius agreed. "Plus, there're presents. And what with it being Harry's first Christmas and all, you know we went all out and bought blinking and singing toys that'll annoy the piss out of mummy and daddy."

"Oh, I brought presents. A f-few. They're in my car," Peter said. "I'll hand them out t-tomorrow."

"Don't worry about it. Just enjoy the party," Remus said. "We'll do presents tomorrow or on Christmas day."

"Are you doing anything on Christmas night, Peter?" Sirius asked. "You should come over here. Lily’s making pudding!"

"My parents are even coming into town," Remus said. "Just for Christmas Eve through Boxing Day. They're coming to dinner at Rachel and Leonard's. It feels weird to call them that, you know? But I can't say the Potters anymore, because James and Lily and Harry are the Potters too."

"Yeah. I still c-can't believe they're m-married," Peter said. "Can you? I mean. Who would've th-thought, right? I suppose I should be used t-to it by now."

"You're not here though, Pete," Sirius said. "Your off in London with your whirlwind career and all that. We see them everyday, and it honestly feels like Harry's been part of our little group forever, you know?"

"Oh. Well. I g-guess," Peter said, looking down. They were right. He wasn't there. He wasn't part of it anymore. They'd adjusted him right out. They probably forgot all about him until he showed up.

"Hey, come on, Pete," Remus said, noticing the downcast look. "You should be proud that you're so successful lately. I knew you had it in you. You were so sure you had nothing to go to after graduation, but look what you've made for yourself! You're away in the city all the time and probably making more money than any of us. You should enjoy your success. You deserve it."

Sirius smiled. "You really do, Petey. Lots of gumption and determination and look what you get? Not working in a bar, I'd say. Hey, Peter, what exactly _do_ you do?"

"Oh, well. Lots of things. I'm sort of, well. A g-go to guy, I guess. I do whatever he wants me to," Peter answered. "Who would've thought out of a-all of us, _I'd_ be the o-one to be s-successful, right?"

"What do you mean by that?" Sirius asked. "You're no less able than me, or Remus, or James, or anyone else."

"Oh, well. R-right," Peter said, confused. Why was Sirius being so nice? "You've h-had a lot to drink, haven't you?"

Remus laughed and raised his own glass before taking a sip. "It's Christmas. We're all allowed to drink."

"There's _nothing_ wrong with drinking. Nothing," Sirius explained. "And I'm always nice."

"Not just when you're drunk, you mean?" Remus asked with a sly smile. "I don't know. You're extra-nice when you're drunk, I think. Or else just loud."

"I can be loud too," Sirius said. "Would you rather I be loud? I could yell naughty things."

"No, no, no, it's okay," Remus said brightly, patting Sirius' chest with his free hand. "You're fine. I like nice better. Keep being nice."

"Naughty can be nice!" Sirius insisted. "Although I suppose Father Christmas only sees it one way or another. The old bugger must not get shagged enough."

"Right. That's definitely it," Remus agreed. "Mrs. Claus is too frigid up there at the north pole."

"Why is e-everything about sex?" Peter asked, a small smile on his face. It was both amused and a little uncomfortable.

"Because sex makes the world go 'round," Sirius said. "Sex is like... the centre of all things. It's like, the Earth to our moon, the sun to our solar system. The Rudolph to all those other reindeer."

Remus snickered and brought a hand up to cover his mouth. "You're ridiculous. God, I love Christmas. I love you."

Sirius grinned. "I love you, too! Like the way Father Christmas loves cookies, and you _know_ how fat he is."

"Come on, let's go sit on the couch," Remus said. "I feel like cuddling. It's late and I'm tired."

"Okay. Bye Pete!" Sirius said, and waved.

"B-bye," Peter said, blinking as they started to walk away. He wasn't sure he'd ever get used to them together. He and Remus had shared a room at school, they'd been closer than Remus and Sirius had for the first few years. Now, though. Now, he was practically invisible whenever Sirius was around. They were in _love_ , supposedly. It was weird.

"You're welcome to come sit with us if you want to, Pete," Remus said over his shoulder as they made their way to the couch.

"N-no, thanks. That's fine. You g-go," Peter said. "I'm fine."

Remus nodded at Pete absently before they continued on their way. When they reached the couch, Remus sat down and pulled Sirius down with him.

"I love this fireplace," Remus said. "It makes the room so cozy."

"Yea, Jamie and Evans picked a nice house," Sirius agreed glancing around. "It's perfect for parties."

"It is great," Remus said.

"What's great?" James said, dropping to the couch next to Remus and Sirius.

"I think the party's turned out pretty great," Lily said, sitting next to James. "Nothing's been broken... yet. And don't get any ideas about christening the place, Sirius."

Sirius laughed. "It's not worth having you kick my arse, Evans," he answered. "And we were talking about how great your house is."

"Oh, Pete just got here," Remus said. "He's floating around someplace."

"He made it, really? That's good," James said. "I'll have to make sure to find him and say hello later."

"Feels like I haven't spoken to him since August. Has he been here since August?" Sirius asked.

"Hardly. He was in town once for his mother's birthday and he met me at the library before we went for lunch, but he was only here for one night," Remus said. "He is a busy, busy man."

"It's ridiculous, it is. He doesn't have any time for his friends," James said with a frown. "Harry isn't even going to recognise him."

"It's weird how things happen, isn't it?" Lily interjected. "In school he was the once desperate to be around the lot of you, and now he's the one who's never around."

"Yeah," Remus said. "Even when he was so weird about Sirius and I, he still stuck around. It's weird not to have him. Nothing's the same since East Portlemouth Prep."

"I miss school sometimes," Sirius admitted. "But then I remember that I don't have to go home and do maths homework and I'm happy to go home and watch the telly instead."

"You never did your maths homework anyway, Sirius," Lily reminded him.

"Or your Chemistry homework, or your English homework. Or any homework, really, unless you absolutely couldn't get out of it," Remus said. "Well, until fourth year, when keeping your scholarship was an issue."

"Guess you can pull up your drawers when you have to, huh?" James said and elbowed his friend. "You know, most of the time I love being an adult because I have a wife and a son I love and a job I'm great at and a house that's the perfect place to raise a family, and the rest of the time I just can't help but wonder where the years went, you know?"

"You sound like your dad, Jamie," Sirius warned. "Watch it. Next thing you'll be balding with a pot belly."

"And my wife will still think I'm hot," James answered proudly.

Remus rolled his eyes. "Everything's always about sex."

"Hey, _you_ mentioned sex. Not me. No one said anything about sex this time," James protested with a laugh.

"Oh, it was going there. You know it was," Remus laughed. He took a deep breath and added, "I just _love_ Christmas."

"I enjoy Christmas sex, personally. Remus and I can play Father Christmas does... well. Mrs. Claus I suppose. You'd make a rosy Mrs. Claus you know Remmie."

"Sex! See? It's always about sex!" Remus laughed.

"Oh, you love it, you know you do," James said with a smirk.

"Well, of course I do," Remus said, looking almost mischievous as he snuggled a little closer to Sirius. "It's sex. Everyone loves sex."


	9. Twisted Logic (January 2nd, 2007)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Where Molly says yes, Elphias says no, and Gideon says fuck.

Fabian was bored.

Sure, his sister was having a baby right now, but he was tired of waiting, and it ceased being exciting, oh, the third time around.

The first time, certainly, he and Gideon had been on the edges of their seat for hours, harassing the nurses and driving everyone crazy. Bill had been nothing compared to Charlie, though, and the second time had given them all a scare with some minor complications. The third time, well. Gideon and Fabian had spent enough hours in the hospital by then to know not to come too early, or at least to bring snacks and games to, respectively, quell hunger and pass the time. Percy had been quick, easy, and exactly as predicted, no surprises.

With Fred and George, everyone had been a little apprehensive. Childbirth? This family was Old Hat at that by now, but twins were something none of them had any experience in. It was uneventful, save the rather odd quirk of the two of them taking turns crying, seemingly one taking over whenever the other had to breathe. There was nothing wrong with them, though. They were just weird.

After that came Ron. Baby number six. He was the biggest out of all of them, and coincidentally also the only one Molly'd had a caesarean for. Not that it was by choice, though. Silly Ron was upside down.

Now, they were here waiting for baby number seven. It bothered Molly a little that Fabian called them by number before they were named, though Fay never really knew why. Molly and Arthur never found out gender before the baby came, though, so Fabian didn't see any other way to go about it. It seemed silly to say Ginevra-or-Arnie every time.

So, here they waited for baby number seven. Molly had been in labour for a few hours already, but the doctors had finally gone in an hour or so ago, so Fabian figured it would be soon. He _hoped_ it would be soon, anyway.

He was, after all, bored.

"Gideon, I'm bored."

Gideon, who'd be dozing off with his head against the wall, jolted slightly and blinked blearily at his brother. He seemed confused about where he was for a moment before realization dawned, and with a groan he said, "Jesus, this is never ending, isn't it? Weren't we _just_ here for this?"

"Yes," Fabian agreed vehemently. "We _just_ were. And it isn't exciting anymore. It's _tedious_. I'd rather be with Caradoc. He has the day off."

"I don't even understand why we're required. Do you see Arthur's brothers here? No. They're busy with their own lives. And mum and dad are in there with them so what the fuck is the point?" Gideon sighed. "And nothing against the mite, but baby number seven is a far stretch from baby number one."

"Stop complaining at me. I agree. Now is the time for entertaining, Mr. Wannabe Actor," Fabian said impatiently. "Do something worth watching. Go on."

"Fuck you, little brother," Gideon answered, just as screams of "YES! Yes, thank sweet Mary and Joseph!" erupted from Molly's room. "Ginevra! Give me my baby girl!"

Fabian grinned. "So they got their girl then. Fabulous."

After a moment, a beaming Clara stuck her head out and gestured to them. "You can come on in and meet my new granddaughter now, boys!"

"Finally," Gideon said, and got to his feet slowly, though he was grinning as widely as his brother. "That means she's going to stop now, right? No more?"

"You keep your mouth shut, Gideon," Clara said with a laugh. "I don't see you two giving me any grandchildren. Molly and Arthur can give me as many as they please."

"I think this does mean they're going to stop now," Fabian said, ignoring their mother's admonishment and smirking at his brother as they headed after their mum into Molly's room. Grandchildren for their mother was all well and good, but _she_ didn't live in Molly's basement and hear every scream those little creatures made. "Oh, look at her. She's beautiful, just beautiful. Hello. Hi there little Ginevra."

"The first one born with hair, Mols," Gideon commented with a smile. "And another redhead. What a surprise."

Arthur seemed beside himself. There were tears in his eyes and he was staring down at his daughter, who had her little tiny hand gripping one of his fingers tightly. "She's strong. Who's my strong little girl?"

"You shush, Giddy," Molly said, looking rather choked up herself. "Coo over your niece." She sniffled and little and then asked, "Speaking of which, when am I getting a niece or nephew, hmm? I think I've given you enough."

"Big flaming fairy," Fabian reminded her absently, his attention still on the red faced little baby in Molly's arms. Fabian seemed to realize what he'd said a beat later, though, and flashed a bright smile around the room. His family was long since used to the idea by now, and even his father just rolled his eyes.

Gideon snorted and said, "I hardly think Hes is ready to provide, no matter what you're expecting."

Molly sighed, looking down at baby Ginevra. It seemed an inappropriate thing to bring up, but Molly had never been one for tact, so she carried right on. "I still don't understand why you're with her Gideon. You and Marlene McKinnon were _made_ for one another. The sooner you both realize that the better in my books."

"Mols, don't," Fabian said sharply, before Gideon could reply. "You don't know the situation, so just leave it, okay? Please?"

"There's a situation? What _sort_ of situation?" Molly asked, confused.

" _Molly_ ," Clara said warningly. "This is your day, but it's not your day to pick on Gideon. Let him be."

"Mum." Gideon spoke softly, to prevent her from continuing. He looked somewhere beyond his sister and said, "Just. Marlene and I gave it a try, Mols, and it wasn't exactly happily ever after."

"Because Marlene is so full of shite that her eyes are brown, but that's neither here nor there," Fabian quipped cheekily. "And since we all have lots and lots of experience at this, I bet, just by the expression on that nice doctor's face that we have, oh, about two minutes to finish our cooing before the lot of us save Art are told to leave. So, I'm going to go wander. Do you want me to bring you anything, Mols?"

"No, I'm fine, Fay," Molly said, her eyes on Gideon. "Gid, are you alright? I didn't mean to upset you, love; I just thought I was knocking some sense into you."

 _You told me what I already know_ , Gideon thought to himself, and swallowed before smiling softly at Molly. His eyes were watering, but it had nothing to do with the new baby. "I'm fine, thanks," he told her, his voice cracking, and he turned and left the room.

Fabian shrugged at the room and then headed for the door. "Touchy subject. Don't worry; I'm working on it. He'll be all right. Congratulations, Molly and Arthur. Again, that is. I'll come back and visit once you've had a chance to rest."

And with that, Fabian fled the room, hoping to catch up with Gideon. Luckily, both fate and the elevator were on his side.

"Still that bad, huh?" Fabian asked as he leaned against the wall next to Gideon.

Gideon rolled his eyes and then wiped them with his sleeve. "It hasn't been. Fuck, I feel like a tool."

"Well don't. That's just silly," Fabian said firmly. "Where are you headed?"

"Stubby OD'd. Thought I'd go see if he was conscious," Gideon replied. "And if he is I'll fix that right up for him."

"You want some company? Someone to hold you back?" Fabian offered as the elevator dinged and the doors began to open. "Just, you know. Murder's a bugger of a thing to get away with, is all."

Gideon laughed. "Nah, that's alright. Go do whatever. I'll meet you back at Molly's room in an hour?"

"Sure," Fabian agreed, and wished he could just _fix it_. He hated seeing his big brother like this. "Keep your chin up, all right?"

"Yea, yea, I will," Gideon said, and stepped onto Stubby's floor.

"An hour, then!" Fabian called as a nurse hurried inside just before the doors slid shut again. "Well, hello. What floor?"

***

"Just a hot chocolate. Oh, and an oatmeal raisin cookie. Those are from the health food store, aren't they? I recognize the brand," Fabian said amiably.

"Yeah, you're right," the girl replied, her voice half bored and half amused, as though she was too tired to like Fabian as much as Fabian knew she probably did. Teenage girls always liked Fabian.

Teenage girls, however, never really held his interest for long, and so he gave her one last smile and turned away as soon as she held out his change. To his surprise, there was Elphias in a corner table, picking at a sandwich and clicking away on his laptop. Something about the whole scenario felt like habit. Maybe it was way he was sitting--half sideways and leaning more against the wall than his chair--or the position of his glasses--sliding down his nose enough so that he could look over top of them and squint at his screen--or the little things--his watch next to his coffee, no jacket with him, his shirt untucked. There was definitely a sense of familiarity.

After a brief internal battle--curiosity and, yes, concern won out--Fabian made his way towards Elf, pausing awkwardly at his old friend's table and clearing his throat. "Uh, Elphias?"

Sure enough, Elphias looked up, shifted to sit properly in his chair, pushed his glasses up, and reached for his watch. He'd definitely been comfortable.

 _Oh shit_. "Fabian," Elphias deadpanned. "What a surprise. Um. What are you doing here?"

"Molly just had a baby. Girl, this time," Fabian answered distractedly. "What are you... Aren't you supposed to be in class in Kingsbridge right now?"

"I dropped out, actually," Elphias answered with a sigh.

"You did? When? How come?" Fabian asked instinctively, before remembering that it wasn't really his business anymore. He and Elphias weren't talking. "I mean. Never mind. What brings you here, then?"

"I dropped out just before Christmas. It was just... a little too much, you know? Or, well. You wouldn't," Elphias said tiredly. He felt sort of obligated to tell Fabian, and even though he'd lied through his teeth to avoid it, now that he'd been caught he could feel it all just waiting to burst out of his mouth. He felt more relieved than anything. "Dad's sick. I'm working three jobs, and I come here whenever I get the chance. Between Mum and me, we can hardly make the mortgage, and college is just out of the question right now."

"Sick?" Fabian asked worriedly, sitting down across from Elphias without even making a conscious decision to. "How sick? Is he going to be all right?"

"No," Elphias sniffed frankly, and then narrowed his eyes at Fabian. "If you're extending the hand of friendship out of pity here, I'll pass."

"Elf, don't be like that," Fabian started. "I just... it's not like that, okay? How long has he been sick?"

"Not quite a year," Elphias answered, tiredly, and took off his glasses to rub the bridge of his nose.

"That long? Cor," Fabian said. "Why didn't you tell me? I mean, I could've..."

"Could've what, Fabian? Found a cure for cancer?" Elphias scoffed. "Hardly."

"I could've been there for you," Fabian said. "Christ. All I knew was that you rather suddenly transformed into this arsehole. I didn't know why. I could've _helped_."

"Helped _what_? Really though? Held my hand? Worked a job for me? Paid the bills?" Elphias shook his head. "I'm surprised Caradoc the artist didn't tell you anyway."

"Caradoc knew?" Fabian asked, confused, though what he really meant was, _Me too. Why didn't he tell me_? "How?"

"I ran into him here while he was delivering food," Elphias answered lightly. "I pulled a Mr. Hyde and got punched in the face for it."

"Oh, Elphias," Fabian sighed, and the disappointment was audible in his voice. Fabian was so torn. Elphias was still this bitter, mean, angry person, but he was also hurting, and Fabian was not the sort of person that ditched a friend in their time of need. "Look, Elf..."

Elphias took a deep breath and shut his laptop cover hard, glancing at Fabian with irritation, "I told you," he said, standing, grabbing the remainder of his lunch in one hand and his computer in the other, "I'm not interested in your pity. So don't bother."

"Elphias. Hey, Elf," Fabian called as he began to walk away, but there wasn't any visible hesitation so Fabian just sighed and slouched against the table, mind spinning.

His hot chocolate was cold.

***

Gideon shuffled slowly towards the room the nurse had directed him to, wondering why he was even bothering. He kept reminding himself that Stubby was supposed to be his friend, and that they'd been mates since they were toddlers, but another side of him kept reasoning that there was a life for them both beyond childhood. Stubby was an immature, drug-using asshole who treated Marlene like an accessory, and Gideon... well. Gideon felt he was a pathetic, washed up loser, hung up on his high school sweetheart. He and Stubby were a lot older now and (while it might seem like Stubby had a future ahead of him) they were both going slowly downhill.

Gideon stood looking at the door number for a while, seriously considering turning back to the elevator. His loyalty to his friends (even the less than stellar ones) won out, however, and he knocked tentatively before letting himself in.

"He's sleeping," Marlene said absently, her voice soft and laced with exhaustion. She'd been keeping a bedside vigil since yesterday, and she couldn't even find the energy to look up from her book at the sound of the door opening. She assumed it was Leroy or one of the other guys from the band. They'd all visited yesterday, and said they'd be back, after all. It wasn't likely to be his parents. They'd come once to check he was going to live, and then disappeared in a huff of disapproving disappointment. Like he needed _that_ right now.

Gideon swallowed. "Right," he croaked. He hadn't been expecting to see Marlene.

"Gideon," Marlene said, dropping her book and snapping her head up at the sound of his voice. It felt so weird to see him there. She certainly hadn't been expecting it. Had the situation been switched, Stubby would never have gone to see Gideon. "He's going to be fine. He should be out by tomorrow afternoon at the latest. I... It's good to see you."

"That's... good," Gideon replied awkwardly. "I was just upstairs." He laughed, because he knew Marlene would appreciate hearing about the baby. "Molly finally had her girl."

"Oh, really? How wonderful," Marlene said with a bright, genuine smile. "What's her name?"

"Ginevra," Gideon answered. "Redhead, of course."

"Ginevra," Marlene replied softly. "That's a beautiful name. Do you think she'd mind if I went to visit her later? I mean, I don't want to impose during family time or anything."

Those words felt foreign and awkward on Marlene's tongue. She used to be considered family, really. She loved all the Prewetts, and they all loved her too, she thought. But she wasn't Gideon's best girl anymore. She wasn't even his best friend. It was weird to have to consider the idea that she wouldn't be welcome.

"Of course, you know she'd love to see you, Kinny," Gideon said. The name felt so strange on his tongue. He couldn't remember the last time he'd called her that. "She, ah. She was talking about you earlier, actually."

"Really?" Marlene asked with a sad smile, rubbing at her eyes tiredly before stretching her stiff arms above her head with a groan. She noticed the use of her nickname. She felt it as much as she would've felt a hug and it made her shiver. He hadn't called her that in ages. "I can tell from that expression it wasn't anything good, was it?"

"Depends on how you take it, really," Gideon answered. "And don't judge much by my expression. It's about as reliable as a car with no motor."

"A car with no motor is pretty reliable, actually," Marlene said with a grin. "You can always count on it _not_ to start."

Gideon smiled slightly, more at Marlene than her lame joke. Her hair seemed shorter, and her eyes very tired. But her smile was genuine... he hadn't seen her smile like that in ages.

They held eye contact for a moment, and then Marlene shook her head and cast an unreadable sort of look at Stubby. She liked Stubby. Sure, he wasn't perfect, and he definitely wasn't Gideon, but she liked him. But it didn't always feel right, especially when Stubby and Gideon were in the same room, and she could see them right up next to one another.

"Could you say it again?" she asked, surprising herself. She looked away from Stubby and up at Gid, who was still sort of hovering in the doorway. She hadn't meant to ask, but it had felt so good to hear, and now she thought she probably ought to clarify. "My name, I mean."

Gideon blinked in surprise. "What? Kinny, you mean?"

Marlene smiled ruefully. "Yeah. I just hadn't realized how much I missed hearing it. No one but you and your little brother ever call me that."

"No one but me is supposed to," Gideon said softly.

"Well, don't worry. Fabian only does it because he knows he can't get away with it," Marlene said, trying to lighten the atmosphere. She reached out to take Stubby's hand with one hand, trying to remind herself how much she cared for him. After a moment, though, she just brought her other hand up to cover her face as her eyes began to water and her mouth tightened. "I miss you, Gid."

Not for the first time since he'd walked in the room, Gideon felt his throat constrict. "Miss me how, Kinny?"

"I just miss you," Marlene said miserably, letting go of Stubby and getting up, walking over to look out the window. She didn't want to look at Gideon, who she was pretty sure was the love of her life even though the situation was way too complicated for her, or at Stubby, who she did like, and who she was committed to, and who didn't have anyone else. Gideon had Hestia.

Nonetheless, Marlene couldn't quite keep herself from adding, "I miss calling you to tell you my three week old pizza finally grew mould. I miss guilting you into letting me paint your toenails, even though you're better at it than me. I miss having you just... just in my life, how you should be. I can't stand this, Gideon."

Gideon licked his lips. "We've done this a million times, Marlene," he said. "We're done it too many times. I'm tired of chasing you. Are you going to let me have you?"

At his words, Marlene just bit her lip and leaned her forehead against the window. Of course, of course it all had to be on her. It had to be her decision because it had all been her fault, anyway. Not that it mattered anymore. Whoever's fault it was, however messed up the situation, Marlene didn't have it in her to say no anymore.

Marlene turned around and leaned her back against the cold pane of the window, staring at Gideon through watery eyes and nodding. "Yeah. Yes. I..."

Gideon practically ran across the room.

He scooped Marlene into his arms, holding her tightly as he swung her around. "Thank _God_ ," he said, his face pressed into her hair, his heart beating in his throat.

Marlene let out one strangled sob into Gideon's neck as she clung to him. Loosening her hold on him just enough to look into his eyes, she lifted one hand to tangle in his hair and breathed, "Is it too late to move to America?"

Gideon laughed and kissed her head all over. "Never, never, never too late," he said. "Let's go tomorrow. Let's go _now_."

"Okay," Marlene said, leaning her forehead against his. In some distant part of her brain, she knew she couldn't. She knew her boyfriend was only feet away, sleeping off a painful overdose in a hospital bed. She knew she couldn't actually give in to what she and Gideon wanted, but... it just felt so good to pretend for a moment that she hoped Gideon would forgive her.

She kissed him, trying to ignore the sting of fresh tears. She missed him so much. All she wanted was to be with him. Breaking the kiss, she sniffled and asked tightly, "What should we bring?"

Gideon laughed and lifted her so she could wrap her legs around him. He couldn't believe this. He wanted to pinch himself. He was grinning so widely it _hurt_. "Don't cry," he said softly, and kissed her again, because he never wanted to _stop_ kissing her. "I never thought... it's just. Ugh, it just feels too good to hold you again."

Marlene did wrap her legs around him, letting her head fall back against the cold windowpane. Her skin burned where it touched the glass. It was winter, after all, but she didn't really mind the sensation. Marlene just tightened her grip on Gideon and buried her face in his neck, her mumbled words almost inaudible as she spoke against his skin.

"I miss you."

Gideon furrowed his eyebrows. "You... miss me. I'm here, Kinny. And I love you."

"I love you too," Marlene replied softly, tears still leaking from her eyes. She couldn't, she couldn't. Stubby needed her and it hurt too much with Gideon, and he would never forgive her for this, for letting him think they could try it once more. Love just wasn't enough sometimes. "Put me down. Please."

Gideon felt the tears start. He knew what was coming. He dropped Marlene to the floor and said, "‘But,’ right? There's always a 'but'. Don't run away again Marlene, please. _Please_. I can't take this anymore."

"I'm sorry. Gideon, I really am," Marlene said, her voice pleading. "Just... just... God, I do love you, I do. So much it hurts not to be with you. But..."

"But what? You feel obligated to that sack of shit over there? Stubby is never going to love you the way I do. He's never going to give you what you deserve Marlene, you're just running away again, and why? I mean, what's left to run away from? I'm a mess without you."

"But _I'm_ okay," Marlene replied, her voice vehement and a little too loud and she cast a worried look over to Stubby to make sure she hadn't woken him. No sign of life yet. "I have a boyfriend. You have a girlfriend, for that matter. I'm just; I'm doing okay, Gideon. I go through mess stages without you, I do, because I still miss you and I still love you, but I don't feel like I'm standing at the edge of a cliff anymore, and I don't want to go back there. It was scary and I didn't feel safe or sane or... I just can't go back there, and you always take me there and just leave me and then I have to find my own way back again, and it's _too hard_."

"You're so full of fucking shit, Marlene," Gideon snapped. "You just, you said..." He ran a hand through his hair and down the length of his face. He felt so pathetic, standing here, pleading with her. "You're giving up on... on me. On us. Fuck, _Kinny_ , please, we really are made for one another. Don't let me go."

"I'm sorry," Marlene said, seeing the pain on his face, hearing it in his voice. Feeling the deliberate use of her nickname. That's what had started all this. A moment of weakness. "I shouldn't have let you think... I didn't mean to... I just." She stopped and put her hands on either side of his face. "I'm sorry."

Gideon pushed her hands away. "Don't. Just." His face was wet and he just couldn't think of anything else to say. "Tell Stubby I dropped by, okay?" And he turned to leave.

"Gideon," Marlene called before he reached the door. "Do you think, um, do you think that we could be friends?"

Gideon stopped. He didn't turn around. He couldn't face her again. He just said, simply, "I don't have it in me, Marlene."

He left.

Well, she should've expected that, she thought. But it still hurt. It _all_ still hurt. She hadn't been lying. She missed him, and the thing she missed most was just... his friendship. They'd been best friends through it all, even through the years between graduation and the tattoo debacle. She didn't know what to do without him, though she supposed it didn't matter. She'd be going on tour with Stubby soon anyway.

So, she sat back down at Stubby's bedside and let herself cry for a while. Thankfully, by the time Stubby woke up an hour or so later, her face was dry even if her eyes were red.

"Marlene?" Stubby called, and then coughed.

"Shh, I'm here. It's all right," Marlene replied.

"What's... where is everyone?" he mumbled. "How come you're the only one here?"

"Your parents stopped by, and Leroy, Ben, and Dale were here earlier. They're going to come back," Marlene said. "Gideon stopped by too. He just left. We didn't want to wake you."

"Gideon? Why?"

"Because you've been friends for years and he's a good person, that's why," Marlene replied.

"He is not," Stubby grumbled. "He's a prick."

"Don't, Stubby," Marlene said sharply.

"He is! And I don't want you to see him anymore," Stubby slurred. He obviously wasn't totally awake yet.

"You know, I have a funny feeling that won't be a problem," she whispered sadly. "You just rest, okay?"

"I love you, Marlene," Stubby said. "Don't ever leave me, okay?"

"I won't."

***

Gideon couldn't do it. He couldn't go back upstairs. He couldn't face his family, especially not his brother. He didn't want to see his happy sister, her happy husband, and their new baby. He just couldn't handle it. But he needed someone. He needed... he needed Emmeline.

Gideon left the hospital without telling anyone where he was going. He took the van, and drove home. He didn't go inside. He didn't call Fabian's handy to let him know he was okay. He just hopped over the fence and knocked on the door.

Emmeline was home alone. Her father was at work and she had been working on arranging a new page of her portfolio. She was keeping it up to date and stocked with all of her best artwork. Mostly photographs, of course, but there were a few other sorts of things here and there.

When the knock at the door sounded, she got up--leaving her mess of paper clippings and art supplies all spread out on the living room floor, and went to answer it. It was Gideon, and she just looked at him for a moment before pushing the door open wider and beckoning him inside.

"From the looks of it, you aren't here for your 'after' photo. Come on, sit down," she said gently, gesturing to the couch. "Want anything?"

"No, that's fine," Gideon answered. "Simulating a tornado?"

"Art is messy," Emmeline replied with a faux-dramatic flourish of her hand. "But come on, Gideon. Tell me what happened."

"Well. Molly had her baby. A girl," Gideon started slowly. "And since Stubby OD'd I thought I'd be, you know. The bigger person."

Emmeline just nodded. She didn't even have to acknowledge out loud that Marlene was there. They both knew she was the only person that could really upset him, and he had to know she'd noticed the red tinge to his eyes. "Good for you."

"Uh. She was there, and we talked kind of... awkwardly for a minute. And I asked her if I could have her back and she said yes..."

"Gideon," Em interrupted with a sigh. Obviously it hadn't gone well if he was here, and Emmeline wished he'd stop setting himself up. "I thought you were working on getting over her? Asking to have her back is not conducive to letting her go."

"I know that. But she said yes, and we hugged and kissed and cried, and fuck..." Gideon took a deep breath. "She did that... she... she ran away again."

Emmeline had a feeling he was expecting her to scold him as she just had, but then she remembered the Christmas party at James and Lily's, the conversation with Leroy, Hestia's behaviour, and the conclusion she and Leroy had come to. "Well. Are you still in one piece? Still alive? Heart still beating, if a little more battered than before?"

"I guess so," Gideon replied quietly.

"Well," Emmeline said again. "Than I'd say you got farther this time than you did at the wedding, didn't you?"

"I guess so?" Gideon repeated.

"So that, Gideon, is what they call _progress_ ," Em said with a smile. "I think maybe I was wrong, before, for the record."

"Progress?" Gideon questioned. "Progress how, exactly, in that I'm becoming more and more capable of making a bigger ass out of myself? And what were you wrong about?"

Emmeline ignored his first question and focussed on his second. "I shouldn't have tried to play matchmaker. You should do whatever you feel is right with your life, Gideon. Don't listen too intently to the nosy, meddling neighbour."

"Well, I mean, ridiculous as I just was, things have been good with Hes..." Gideon said thoughtfully. "She's been a little distant since Christmas though."

Right. Well, Emmeline had yet to confront Hestia about the mess she was making, and she wouldn't say anything to Gideon about it until she'd spoken to Hestia, certainly. Em didn't know for sure, after all, and it wasn't the sort of speculation one told the significant other about, especially if it was completely unconfirmed.

"Well, like I said. You have to do whatever you feel is right," she said, leaning forward and patting his hand. "Don't pick easy. Don't necessarily pick hard, either, of course. You just have to try to make yourself happy."

"It's all too confusing," Gideon admitted. "I think I'll just run off and be a monk."

Emmeline grinned. "Come on, now. Don't write us all off. We can be crazy, yes, but sometimes it's worth it."

"That's the problem, though. It was disgustingly worth it before, and look where it's gotten me," Gideon said. "I'm a big blubbering mess. What bird wants a man like me?"

"I'm not even going to dignify that with an answer," Em said. "You know I don't support pity parties, and you know I think you can do anything you set your mind to. If you don't want to be a big blubbering mess, then don't be. Change your frame of mind. But don't think you can say 'woe is me, woe is me' all day and I'll listen to you."

Gideon rolled his eyes. "I'm not looking for pity, Em, I'm being frank. I cry. A lot. It's ridiculous."

"Why?"

"I don't know. Little things remind me of Marlene and it sets me off like an automatic sprinkler," Gideon said. "It's not healthy. I can't control myself. Molly was saying in the hospital today that Marlene and I were made for one another and I got all emotional right there in front of everyone."

"Well, we know how you feel about her," Em said, not unkindly. "Let's think about Marlene for a second. It's obvious she still feels something for you and she was just lying through her teeth at the wedding. The way I see it, one of two things could happen. One, she'll keep torturing you and herself and end up marrying some shmuck after Stubby drops her, because really, I highly doubt he'll be able to avoid the temptation of groupies. So scenario number one is that you're both miserable. Or two, once Stubby drops her, she finally realizes she has no more excuses. Scenario number two: happily ever after."

"So you're saying... be optimistic?" Gideon asked.

"I'm saying," Emmeline answered, pausing meaningfully, "never let her think you've given up on her, or she'll think you've given up on her. But in the meantime, you still have to try to make yourself..."

"Happy," Gideon finished for her. "Yes, I know. And I'll try."

"Well, all you can do is try." Smiling, Emmeline patted his shoulder and said, "You know, I'm not sure there'll ever really be an after for us to photograph."

Gideon smiled slightly. "Hopefully. Someday. I'm hiring you now to do my wedding when and if it happens."

"Deal. Now enough moping. Your family has no idea where you've disappeared to, am I right?"

"I suppose I should call before Fabian thinks the worst and defends my honour by harassing Marlene," Gideon said. "Or thinks I've thrown myself off the roof or something."

"Hm. Splat," Em said. "Phone's in the kitchen. Save your minutes."


	10. Past Poisons (January 24th, 2007)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Where Sirius interjects, Andromeda hits a nerve, and Dora Tonks wants to fly a motorbike.

Gideon had passed on the word that Vol de Mort fashions had taken over the docks for their spring photo shoot, and while Sirius had considered getting someone to go with him, everyone was either working or otherwise occupied and he'd decided to just say fuck it and deal with it himself. Even if he just managed to push one of the slime ball models into the ice-cold January water he'd feel as though he'd accomplished something. Especially if the bitch was wearing fur.

Tiptoeing around boxes and barrels, Sirius pulled his jacket more tightly together wishing he'd had the common sense to wear something thicker than a windbreaker. He'd never been one to dress appropriately for the season, so his hands were freezing, and so was his head. Making a mental note to buy himself a hat and some gloves later, Sirius side-stepped around a trailer bearing the Vol de Mort logo and peered around the edge.

God damn it all. Narcissa was standing by the water in heels and a swimsuit, and sure enough she was wrapped in a fox fur boa that still had the poor thing's head on it. Sirius cringed; he was torn between his love for wreaking havoc and his dedication to his cousin, who was the only person in his family besides Regulus that he liked. When he spotted baby Draco wrapped up to the nines and sitting with his nanny not too far away that was the clincher. He wouldn't make a spectacle of himself in front of the baby. He just wouldn't.

When he turned to leave, however he came face to face with Bellatrix Lestrange.

"You annoying little maggot. This is a closed set," Bellatrix said, her voice half bored and half disgusted. "Call the police."

"Sirius!" Narcissa shrieked with a smile. Turning to face a man to her left, she asked, "We're done this outfit, aren't we? Fetch my robe, trousers, and slippers then."

Lou simply nodded and moved to comply, taking his trainee, Warner Nott along with him. Mere weeks ago, Lou would've at least rolled his eyes, but this was now the fourth event he'd worked with Narcissa, and he'd quickly realized she was the new face of Vol de Mort Fashions. She was Riddle's little prodigy, his favourite, his _star_. Plus, Bellatrix had some weird attachment to her. She oversaw every shoot and show Narcissa did. He knew better than to mess with that, and mere moments later, she was clad in nice, warm clothing while the entire set, apparently, took a break between outfits so she could chat with the new arrival. Spoiled brat.

"Hey Cissa," Sirius said, and shot his tongue out at Bellatrix with a smirk. "Bring Draco here. He looks like a little Eskimo all bundled up."

Narcissa scooped up her son and walked over to Sirius and Bellatrix. "Isn't he cute? I just bought him all these clothes. He almost has as many clothes as me now, the gorgeous little thing." After pausing to kiss Draco on the forehead (leaving a bright lipstick mark in the process), she handed Draco over to Sirius and smiled sweetly at Bellatrix. "Bellatrix, this is my cousin Sirius. Sirius Black."

Sirius bounced Draco on his hip and made a few funny faces at him, eliciting some giggles and a big toothless smile. "Nice to meet you _Bellatrix_ ," Sirius said. "Just thought I'd stop by, you know, see Cissa in action."

Bellatrix glared at him coldly for a moment before snarling, "I don't care _who_ he is, he's going to get the off of my set or he's going to be forcibly removed."

Narcissa had no right throwing that name in Bellatrix's face. She'd done her part, and she didn't owe Narcissa anything else any longer, nor did she feel any sort of attachment to this pain in her arse just because of his last name. Did Narcissa think she didn't _know_ , throwing it around like that? It was her _job_ to know all about the Order. She knew everything there was to know about the core members.

"Oh, come on Bella," Narcissa said, using the tones of someone who'd won. "He's family."

"He's also had many previous altercations with both myself and Riddle personally as well as caused problems at other Vol de Mort functions," Bellatrix said blandly, pulling out her cell phone. "He should thank his lucky stars I'm giving him the chance to walk out of here."

"Oh what am I going to do, Lestrange? Stand here and talk to Ciss for a bit and make faces at the baby. Who's it hurting?" Sirius asked. "And she's right, you know, we do share the same blood and all. Least you could do, really." He was pushing it now and he knew it, but Narcissa was a force on her own and he was pretty sure she didn't have any trouble keeping Bellatrix in check.

When Bella didn't appear phased, Narcissa snapped a hand out and clamped it over Bellatrix's phone, successfully halting the dialling. "He could let your secret out as easily as I could. You may like to be a little kinder to my personal guests."

"Do _not_ touch me," Bellatrix hissed, eyes going dark and wild. "I would rather inform all involved parties myself than be nice to the likes of _him_ , now GET OFF OF MY SET BEFORE I REMOVE YOU IN PIECES!"

At the sound of Bellatrix yelling, the set stilled. After a moment, Andrew Mulciber took out his camera and began to snap pictures while other people seemed to be hiding, or at the very least, getting out of the way to watch from a safe distance. Bellatrix's tempers were legendary.

Sirius passed Draco to his mother before his hands curled into fists and he quirked an eyebrow. "Bring it on, bitch," he snapped. "Just fucking _try it_."

Narcissa took Draco quickly, taking a step back from what looked about to get ugly. As much as she feared for Sirius' life at the moment--he was fooling himself if he thought she wouldn't do it, Narcissa had heard the stories--Draco came first. Cissa turned on her heel and walked over to the nanny, handing Draco back to her with a meaningful look.

"Stay here," she told the woman firmly before walking back into the fray haughtily, clamping one hand onto Bellatrix's forearms and the other to Sirius'. "Both of you need to _stop_. You're behaving like children, honestly."

Bellatrix yanked her arm out of Narcissa's grip hard enough to make Narcissa stumble into that disgusting little cousin of hers. What _nerve_ that blackmailing, manipulative little tramp had!

"Don't _push_ her, you fucking twatmuffin!" Sirius said, standing in front of her, blocking her from Bellatrix. "You don't fucking touch anyone in my family, I don't care if you're in it."

"I am _not_ your family, you perverted little..."

"Enough!" Narcissa shouted in her most demanding voice, and when it was obvious that wasn't going to work, she took a deep breath and began screaming as loudly as she could. She kept screaming until every single person was looking at her. She smiled sweetly in response.

"What the _fuck_...?" Sirius started, but was interrupted by the sound of a woman clearing her throat.

She was roughly Narcissa's height with short red hair. Otherwise she and Bellatrix could easily pass for sisters, and the three Blacks watched her, mouths agape, totally surprised by her sudden presence.

"I do hate to be a bother," she said with a slight smile, "but your yelling caught my attention and I'm horribly lost. I don't suppose either of you happen to know where a Cygnus Black lives, do you?"

"He's my uncle," Sirius blurted, before he could stop himself.

"Why do you want to know?" Narcissa asked, quickly regaining her composure and speaking as though she had the right to know everything about the situation, and how dare anyone think otherwise. "He's a very busy man and doesn't have time for trivialities. Who are you, exactly?"

"I'm Andromeda Tonks," the woman answered coolly, although she was a little taken aback by the young girl's attitude. "And he's my father." Looking at Sirius' baffled expression she added, "I guess that makes you my cousin?"

Bellatrix blinked, and then let out a short, harsh cackle.

"My, my, Narcissa," Bellatrix drawled. "It sounds like your family has more secrets in need of protecting than mine does."

"He isn't your father," Narcissa snapped, eyes narrowing. "He's _my_ father, and... how old are you?"

"You'll be my sister then," Andromeda said with certainty and reached into her purse. "I have my birth certificate, if you'd like proof. And I'm twenty-seven, for whatever it's worth to you."

Narcissa stared at the woman coldly for a moment and sneered at the card she produced as though it were trash. "No, thank you. And my parents have been happily married for twenty-eight years. Twenty-nine this spring, in fact. So you are clearly mistaken. I trust you remember the way out of town?"

Andromeda pursed her lips. "I have a right to know my real father, thank you, and a DNA test would quickly prove it. According to what my mother has told me, the pictures she's shown me, and this birth certificate, however, you and I share the same genes. Now you can either help me, or I'll deal with this on my own."

Sirius, having been flabbergasted into speechlessness up until that point, closed his mouth and licked his lips a few times before saying, "She showed you pictures?"

Narcissa's nostrils flared. "You're a liar. You're a liar and a vulture and you just want money, don't you? I won't have you profiting from a scandal at our expense."

Bellatrix, who'd been watching events unfold through narrowed eyes, felt her temper flare. What a mess Cygnus had made. "Do not exacerbate the situation. She's a child, and you're being callous."

"I'm not a child and I don't need your help, Bellatrix," Narcissa sneered. "Will someone get Lucius on the phone please? I wish for him to come pick me up now. I'm finished here. I have no desire to hang around for this rubbish family reunion."

"And who are you?" Andromeda asked, looking at Bellatrix sceptically. "I'm not exacerbating anything. I came here with a purpose I intend to carry through."

Bellatrix looked down her nose at Andromeda, regarding her as though she was speaking some form of English so barbaric that it was a chore for Bella to expend the effort necessary to understand it and reply. Instead of answering, however, Bellatrix whirled on her heel and began stalking away, saying loudly, "Whoever allowed my photo shoot to turn into a three ring circus is going to be licking the floors clean from basement to penthouse at headquarters in London. Start packing up, we'll finish tomorrow."

Narcissa watched her go through narrowed eyes and then cast a wide-eyed, irate look at Andromeda before turning to her cousin. "Sirius. Fix this. This isn't happening."

Sirius was shocked, but not stupid enough not to realize that Narcissa was on the verge of having a panic attack. He ran a hand through his hair and blinked confusedly a few times between Andromeda and Narcissa before saying, "So wait a second. How'd you come to the conclusion that Uncle Cygnus is your father?"

"Yes, do put the wild and unfounded accusations aside and let's hear a whole _new_ batch of lies," Cissa spat, motioning for Annette, her nanny, to bring Draco over. She wanted to hold him again. Annette walked over, depositing Draco in Narcissa's arms, but before she had a chance to retreat, Narcissa caught her by the wrist and said, "Could you get Lucius on the phone, please? Ask him to come here and pick me up."

"But he's working, and there's a company appointed driver waiting..." Annette started.

" _Please_ , Annette. Just... tell him it's important?" Cissa interrupted, her voice soft and insistent, and Annette nodded, looking startled.

Annette liked Narcissa well enough, even if she thought the girl was incredibly out of touch with reality sometimes, and even if she was far too young (in age and maturity) to have a child, Narcissa treated Draco well enough that Annette couldn't fault her there. This was, however, possibly the first time she'd ever heard her say please to anyone other than Mr. Malfoy, and it was possibly the least dignified tone of voice Narcissa had ever used as well. So without further ado, Annette walked back over to the small pile of stuff and started looking through her purse for her phone. The number of the school was programmed into speed dial.

"Now. You were about to attempt to explain," Narcissa said, injecting some haughtiness into her voice as she turned her full attention to Andromeda and bounced Draco on her hip absently. He was a good baby, and as long as he got his share of the spotlight often enough, he was content to just take everything in.

"You have a child?" Andromeda asked, surprised. "You're just a baby yourself!"

Sirius waved his hand. "Long story, and not the point of our conversation," he said. "Cissa's not the one on trial here."

"Well enough," Andromeda said. "I was raised by my mother and her husband. He's always been the man I've known as my father and had _assumed_ that he was as I'd never been told differently. I'm married, I have my own family, and he walked me down the aisle... he treated Dora like his own granddaughter..." Andromeda trailed off sadly for a moment and then shook her head. "Last week I was helping my mother sort through the attic and found pictures of her with another man, who she pointed out as a Cygnus Black and then proceeded to explain that she had something important to tell me."

"That he was your dad," Sirius said frankly.

"Yes. And that she'd thought she'd loved him, but he was a married man and she hadn't wanted to burden him with choosing her over his wife," Andromeda explained. "She broke it off when she found out she was pregnant and instead married the man I've called Dad."

"Does he know? Cygnus. Does he know about you?" Narcissa interjected. "Presuming any of this is true, of course. Did your mother tell him?"

"No," Andromeda answered. "Like I said, she didn't want him to choose. He'd told her that he and his wife had been trying for children for years. After they stopped seeing one another, there was nothing more than a brief exchange of Christmas cards and a few awkward telephone calls."

Narcissa closed her eyes for a moment and pressed a kiss to Draco's forehead. She'd never hated her father before, even in her most intense moments of irrational anger growing up. Even when she'd found out about Bellatrix, she'd more blamed Bella and her continued presence in Cygnus' life via the will than her father. But now, if this was true, if any of it had even the smallest grain of truth...

This would just kill her mother. The affair that had resulted in Bellatrix had been during their engagement. He'd sworn that since they'd been married, he'd been faithful. But standing right in front of Narcissa was proof he had not been.

"You can't tell him," Narcissa said suddenly, opening her eyes. "My mother can't find out. She'll just die. I'll pay you. I have money. That's what you've come for, isn't it?"

"I don't need money, no," Andromeda said. "My husband works with his father's company and makes enough to keep us quite comfortably. I just need to know him. I don't like to have gaps in my life... surely there's a way to arrange this so your mother doesn't find out? I'm not looking to ruin anyone's life here; I just want to fit in the puzzle pieces to my own."

Narcissa had just begun to hate her father, who'd never done anything but love her, and Andromeda thought she hadn't ruined any lives yet? Perhaps not in a big, substantial way, but family was important to Narcissa. This had changed everything. One stupid mistake she could forgive. But this was not that. Not if it were all true.

"He's an unfaithful, philandering letch. What possible reason could you have to want to know _that_ ," Narcissa snapped.

"Narcissa," Sirius said softly, resting a hand on her shoulder.

Andromeda frowned. "Perhaps this isn't... I don't want to hurt anyone."

"Well, it's too late for that, isn't it?" Narcissa spat, shrugging off Sirius' hand. "You waltz in on your high horse, spouting out all sorts of rubbish about how you have a _right_ and how you _aren't leaving_ and acting like _I'm_ the one who just doesn't get it, like _I'm_ unreasonable to hate you for existing. I am his _daughter_ , his _real_ daughter. I called him Daddy and he taught me how to read and he went horseback riding with me every single summer. Did you even think about what that would mean to me? Just... go do what you came to do. You follow Beach Street back towards town to get there. You'll see our stone wall before you get to the gate and you'll have to intercom in for them to let you up. Why don't you try explaining it to the help? Who knows, maybe they've been trained for this. Maybe there are all sorts of illegitimate children running around. I don't care what you do. Just go."

Andromeda sighed. "I can only imagine... if Ted... No. I've done enough damage. I'll just drive home. And I should be getting back to the car anyway, Dora is probably awake..."

"You brought your daughter with you?" Sirius asked.

Nodding Andromeda said, "I wanted her to meet her grandfather... to understand that things aren't always black and white. I'm a silly woman. Sorry to have troubled you."

Narcissa just shook her head and walked away. She was an aunt to a child, a girl. Who knew how old she was. She couldn't deal with this.

"Annette, what did Lucius say?" Narcissa asked sharply. No, she _could_ deal with this. She just couldn't deal with this _alone_.

"He's on his way, Narcissa."

"I'll walk you to your car?" Sirius offered Andromeda once Narcissa was out of an earshot. This seemed so surreal.

"Thank you... what was your named again?" Andromeda asked. "You'll have to forgive me. I never forget a face but I can't remember names to save my life."

"Sirius," Sirius answered as they started walking away from the shoot site and toward the parking lot.

"And how are you related to Cygnus?" Andromeda inquired curiously.

"Uh, my father, Orion, is his younger brother. They had an older brother Alphard but he died a while ago," Sirius explained.

Andromeda, tired by now of being in the spotlight, relished in getting some answers from Sirius. "How'd he die?" she asked. "Did Cygnus have a hard time with it? Was he married? Did he have any children?"

Sirius smiled slightly. "He had cancer. And, well, Uncle Alphard was gay. He and his partner were together for a little over a decade. And I have no idea how Uncle Cygnus took the news, though not too hard I imagine. They were on the outs with Alphard, he and my dad that is. Because of the gay thing."

"You're not close with Cygnus?"

"No," Sirius said. "I was when I was younger, but I've disgraced the family as well. My brother and I aren't on speaking terms with our parents, or really anyone but Narcissa at the moment."

The turned into the parking lot and Andromeda unlocked her car, beeping faintly in the distance. "What did you do to merit that?" she asked inquisitively.

Sirius snorted. "Another long story, but to put it simply I'm following in Uncle Alphard's footsteps."

"Ah," Andromeda said as a little girl clamoured out of the backseat of the car and ran towards them.

"Mummy! A man walked past with a dead fox and carried it into that trailer!" she said, eyes bright with curiosity, disgust nowhere in sight. "Will you take me to go see it?"

"No sweetie," Andromeda replied. "It's just clothes, nothing special." She lifted the little girl into her arms and said, "Dora, this is Sirius. Say hello."

"Hello," Dora chirped. "I'm Dora and there are only five months until my birthday. I'll be eight whole years old. Then it will be, um, how many years again until I can have pink hair, Mummy?"

Andromeda laughed. "Five, as promised," she said.

"Hello Dora," Sirius said. "There are just six more months until my birthday. I'll be twenty whole years old."

"Wow. I won't be twenty for probably like, a thousand months," Dora said reverently. Then, as doing him a favour, Dora explained, "You're old enough to have pink hair, did you know? I can help you pick out a colour, if you want. I'm good at colours, and that 'm' one is my favourite. What is it again, Mummy?"

"Magenta, sweetie," Andromeda answered.

"I quite like having black hair," Sirius said. "My friend Dorcas has hair like red crayons. I think you'd like her very much."

"Cool! Mummy, can I have red hair now and then pink hair when I'm big?" Dora asked excitedly.

"I think brown suits you quite fine, Dora," Andromeda said. "Run along back to the car now, I'll be there in a moment."

"But I don't want to. I like Sirius," Dora said. "He has very straight teeth. Can he come home with us?"

"Thank you. But I have to go to my own house. I might see you again though," Sirius said.

"Oh. Okay. Bye bye!" Dora said, and then climbed out of her mother's arms and ran back to the car, getting in and shutting the door, making faces at Sirius through the window.

"She's an interesting little tyke," Sirius said, and made a few faces back.

"She has a lot of grand ideas about herself," Andromeda said, looking back and smiling at her daughter. "And she's incredibly nosy. Wants to know everything."

"I was like that as a kid," Sirius said.

"Me too," said Andromeda.

They were quiet for a moment as Sirius and Dora exchanged a few more faces between them before Sirius took a deep breath and said, "I wouldn't... I wouldn't rule out meeting him just yet. Narcissa is a family oriented girl. She won't leave this. I mean, she keeps in touch with Bellatrix and that woman is evil incarnate..."

"The dark-haired woman with all the attitude?"

"Yes. She's what I like to call 'Uncle Cygnus' big mistake'," Sirius said. "When Uncle Cygnus and Aunt Edie were engaged he kind of... screwed around on her and Bellatrix is the product of that. In any case, I'm almost sure that Narcissa'll call you."

"Thank you, Sirius. And if you're ever in Liverpool, please look me up," Andromeda insisted. "I'm sure Dora would love it."

"I will," Sirius agreed. "And I really do have to get going. Work in an hour. Nice meeting you, Andromeda." He shook her hand lightly and turned, heading toward the motorbike parked at the lot's opening.

Dora began speaking excitedly the very moment her mother opened the door and she had an audience to listen to her. (Though that hadn't always stopped her in the past. Dora, at times, carried on lengthy conversations with her stuffed animals.)

"Mummy, is that Sirius' motorbike? He's getting on it. It is his, isn't it? One day, I'm going to have a motorbike and black hair like Sirius and I'm going to ride all over the world. Vroom, vroom!" Dora said, mimicking the noise excitedly. "I want a _flying_ motorbike. Can I have one that flies, like Santa Claus' sled?"

"Motorbikes don't fly, darling," Andromeda answered, starting the car. "And you like Sirius, hm?"

"Yes. Do you think he would marry me one day? He's very fetching, isn't he?" she said brightly.

"Yes, quite fetching. But you won't be marrying him Dora," Andromeda explained, purposely leaving out the part about Sirius shacking up with a blokes. "He's your cousin," she said. "We don't marry our relatives."

"He's my cousin? How come I never met him before?" Dora asked. "And how come he wasn't at Grandpa's funeral?"

"He's related to a different grandpa. You'll meet him someday too, just... not today," Andromeda said. "There are lots of different types of family, sweetie, and we happen to be a part of a very special one."

Dora seemed to contemplate this for a moment, before she grinned and said, "So if Sirius is family, can I go for a ride on his motorbike?"

"Maybe someday, if you behave, he'll take you out on it," Andromeda said. "But not until you're old enough to turn your hair pink."


	11. Sweet Child O' Mine (February 16th & 17th, 2007)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Where Dorcas stands her ground, Edgar finds his footing, and both find new meaning in the word 'family'.

"God, fuck, the traffic was ridiculous. There's construction like three blocks up and those fucking flag people don't know how to do their jobs," Dorcas said after bee-lining it through the dining room to her family's usual table at the country club. It was a little too close to an apology for Dorcas' liking and so she sat down cross-legged in her chair and reached to take a sip of her mother's wine. "Plus, I haven't seen Jeremiah since the last fucking time you guys dragged me here so you know I just had to stop and talk. Can you believe he still works here? Oh, Daddy, you remember Ed, right? The boy that saved me from a life of lesbianism?"

"Dorcas," Daniel Meadowes scolded, though he sounded almost as though he were hiding a smile. He was a busy man. He didn't know his daughter as well as he would've liked, and he knew himself well enough to know he never would. But he loved her, every little, shocking bit of her, even though he disapproved. "Hello, Edgar."

"Hello, sir," Edgar said nervously as he took a seat, glancing around the table. He felt a bit like a monkey in his best, freshly pressed suit, and rather like he ought to be sweeping up in the lobby rather than sitting down to dinner.

"You could've worn something a little more formal, Dorcas, darling," her mother, Joanne said, smiling slightly. "This is a respectable place you know, not some beatnik little club."

"Oh, blah, blah, blah, mother. I've come here in worse. And this wine is gross. Have we ordered appetizers yet? Can I have ess-car- _got_?" Dorcas asked, deliberately mispronouncing it to include the silent 't' because she knew it annoyed her mother. 

"No," Daniel said. "We're having crab and artichoke dip."

"Ugh," Dorcas complained. "I fucking hate artichokes. Hey Bonesie, do you want to share escargot?"

Edgar laughed anxiously and said, "Ah, no, crab is fine. I like crab," while his brain laughed at him for sounding like a complete and utter douche bag.

"Well Dorcas?" her sister Gillian (who was sitting next to her father) asked, raising an eyebrow in Edgar's direction. "Are you going to introduce your gentleman to myself and Brian?"

"Gilly, this is my boyfriend Edgar Bones. Ed, this is my big, stodgy sister Gillian and her husband Brian," Dorcas said, sticking her tongue out at her sister. "I'll bet you twenty pounds mine is better in bed that yours."

Edgar's face turned beat red at Dorcas' comment and he looked at his lap just as Joanne said, "Dorcas! Talk like that is hardly appropriate at home, but _certainly_ not here."

"Looks as though you're embarrassing your boyfriend, Dor," Gillian said, smirking.

Dorcas was ready with a witty quip, but then she noticed Edgar's red cheeks and took a deep breath and wrinkled her nose before smiling at him. "Right. Sorry, I guess." Had she really just apologized? Clearing her throat, she added, "So Brian. I hear you got promoted. Congratulations. You do realize I'm still going to call you every time I get arrested, right?"

"I wouldn't have it any other way, Dorcas," Brian replied with a wink. "Perhaps Edgar here'll tame you down a bit though, huh? I'm impressed that he's reeled you in."

Laughing slightly, Edgar quietly said, "You couldn't tame Dorcas down with a straight jacket," more to himself than to anyone else.

"You've got that one right, my boy," Daniel said with a gruff laugh before taking a sip of his drink--something expensive on the rocks as usual, though Dorcas didn't keep track of what he was drinking these days beyond knowing there were about six bottles in the liquor cabinet that her father would notice if she took.

"Like any of you would even fucking recognize me if I was _tame_ ," Dorcas said, and reached over to take Edgar's hand, wondering idly why no one had noticed that she was trying.

***

"When's your girlfriend going to be here, Eddie?" Edgar's sister Amelia asked from where she sat on the couch. "I'm anxious to meet the vixen who's stolen my baby brother's heart."

Rolling his eyes Edgar replied. "So you've said Ames, about fifty times since you've got here."

"Well we're anxious, Eddie! And she's late!" Jon called from the kitchen.

"You haven't tossed the salad yet anyway," Joseph Bones, Edgar's father, said loudly. "Seems to me like she's already running on Bones family time. She'll fit right in."

"Tossing the salad takes two seconds!" Jon said with a laugh. "Is she always late? And Ma, is the gravy done? Can I taste it to make sure?"

"Keep your fingers out of the gravy boat, Jon! Don't make me smack you with a spoon!" Anna answered.

"She runs on her own time," Edgar told his brother. "And of course she'll fit right in. She's loud and likes gravy! What's not to like?"

"Doorbell!" Jon and Amelia shouted at the same time, before the dinging even finished. Jon, who was now nursing a sore knuckle after attempting to taste test the gravy, bolted for the door, but his dad caught his shirt as he passed the couch.

"Don't you move, you rats! Let Perry get it, you'll scare her away!" Joseph scolded. "Perry?"

"I'm on it," Perry said, smooching Amelia on the cheek before bounding to the door, throwing it open to reveal Dorcas, looking very uncomfortable in a teal, flower print blazer over a white t-shirt and tight jeans. At least this time there were no holes in her trousers and she had her hair back in a messy bun. "Well hello. You must be Dorcas. I'm Perry, Amelia's fiancé. Come on in. And don't let them steamroll you."

"Steamroll?" Dorcas said with fake bravado, stepping inside the door and immediately removing her jacket. Her mother had made her wear it, along with a bit of makeup and, at the very least, a t-shirt with sleeves that covered her bra instead of her usual wife beater. "I'm un-steamroll-able. Hello, everyone!"

Edgar knew what was coming. He and Amelia had done it with Jon's wife Sherry, and he and Jon had done it when Perry showed up on the scene. It was an unspoken sibling law in the Bones' household. No outsider got to claim them for keeps without family approval. "Hello, love," he said, walking over and sliding an arm around her waist. "You look..."

"She looks smashing!" Amelia interjected cheerfully. "And she's got very happy hair. What colour would you call that exactly, Dorcas?"

"Siren," Dorcas answered, quirking her lips. "And shut up, Bonesie. The blazer is my mother's. Gag. Oh, you know. Not that I don't... value family or something."

So far, so good, Dorcas thought. Sure, that last bit was little look-at-her-trying-way-too-hard, but she'd spoken practically half a dozen sentences and so far, not one expletive. It felt weird, but in a good way. She could do this. Even if she'd never met anyone's family before.

"Siren, huh? Fascinating," Jon said. "Sirens are, after all, one of the only things in the world everyone has to pay attention to."

"Jon, go toss your bleeding salad," Joseph interrupted.

"No, I want to stay and get to know our guest," Jon protested.

"I'll do it," Perry offered. "I've got a way with vegetables. Must be all those nights I've carried Amelia to bed after she's nodded off on top of her books."

With that, Perry disappeared.

Joseph just rolled his eyes and said, "Hello, Dorcas. I'm Joe, Ed's pop. Don't mind my kids. They haven't got a lick of manners between them, not like Ed here. Who knows where he picked it up."

"Grandma," Edgar answered cheekily. "I didn't practically live over there for years because I liked her cooking you know."

"Grandma Bones' cooking was like eating deep-fried dirt," Amelia explained to Dorcas. "Deep-fried dirt covered in expired mayo."

"Well. In that case, I hope you're not using any old family recipes tonight," Dorcas said with a tentative grin. Was she allowed to joke like that?

Anna's laugh rang out from the kitchen, and she called, "Lucky for you lot I didn't start out as a Bones!"

Grinning, Amelia said, "So, Dorcas. How old are you again?"

"Seventeen, almost. In a few days," she answered.

"Oh, when's your birthday?" Jon asked brightly.

Dorcas grinned unrepentantly. "June."

"You do realize it's February, right?" Jon asked with a snort.

"Well, yeah. Which is approximately a hundred days, give or take," Dorcas replied.

Edgar laughed as Amelia said, "You're not as close to seventeen as Eddie is to twenty. Age ever bother you Dorcas?"

"Ever feel like a kid playing grown up? I mean you must have, what, two years of school left at least, and here Ed is working full-time already," Jon said. "You're at totally different stages."

"Yeah, now. But so? When I'm a hundred and he's a hundred and four, neither of us will be able to wipe our own arses, so what does it matter?" she said, trying to sound casual but all the questions were starting to irk her, and she shot a look at Ed.

Amelia snorted and gave Jon a nod. "The kid's got a point," she said.

Edgar shrugged and mouthed ' _they're testing you_ ' just as Sherry walked down the stairs.

"Hey honey," Jon said, spotting Sherry sans baby and still with the monitor clipped to her belt. "Susan's still sleeping, then?"

"She woke up long enough to let me change her bum then went right off again. Who's this?" she asked, looking at Dorcas. "You're Eddie's girl then?"

"Yeah. Dorcas. Hi," Dor said, smiling at the new arrival. "You must be Sherry, right? Jon's wife, I assume?"

"Yeah. Sherry and Perry are the pair that married in," Perry quipped, popping his head in from the kitchen in time to catch Dorcas' comment. "And dinner is served. Come sit down, everyone."

***

"So, wait, what's this again?" Edgar asked Dorcas under his breath, looking sceptically at the artichoke dip. "It looks like sewer sludge."

"Crab and artichoke dip with some kind of foreign cheese melted on. Camembert, I think. One of the creamy ones, anyway," Dorcas answered in a whisper. She was familiar with the menu at the country club, especially the family favourites. They'd been dining there for years, after all, even if it had been a few months since her parents had invited her back. She'd caused quite the scene last time she was here. Scooping some of the goop up with the little spoon and piling it on one of the fancy little pieces of pita bread provided, she held it up to Ed's mouth and added, "It's pretty good, here taste."

Obliging, Edgar opened his mouth and took a bite. "Mmm," he said, chewing. "Not bad."

"I don't know what sort of manners your family entertains, Edgar, but at the country club we don't chew with out mouths open," Gillian said, sniffing.

Edgar swallowed quickly and mumbled, "Sorry."

"Hey! Stuff it up your asshole, Gilly," Dorcas said quickly, glaring, popping some food in her mouth and only chewing it until it was mangled enough to be gross before sticking her tongue out at her sister.

"Dorcas, behave," Daniel admonished.

"What, not behaving like a stuffed up society princess gets a fucking reprimand, but her being a bitch to my boyfriend is allowed? Okay then. Brian, your tie is hideous and you smell like you rolled in dog shit. There, how's that?" Okay, so perhaps Dorcas went a _little_ overboard there, but they weren't allowed to be mean to Ed. She wouldn't let them.

"Dorcas," Edgar said softly. This really wasn't necessary. One stupid slip-up and they were all likely to tell Dorcas to take him and get lost.

Brian, however, chuckled. "I told you this cologne was too strong, Gillian."

Joanne just sighed. "My children," she said.

Dorcas squeezed Ed's thigh and grinned at Brian. "Well, I still like you, anyway. I don't know how you got saddled with _her_. She fooled you into thinking she was cool by having such a wicked little sister, didn't she?"

"That must've been the trick," Brian agreed solemnly, as his wife scoffed at his side. "Oh don't be so uptight, Gillian! There are worse things than speaking with your mouth open."

"Like getting lockjaw giving a blowjob in the boys' washroom at school and having to go to the nurse about it," Dorcas suggested, feigning innocence.

Daniel coughed and set his drink down, looking like he didn't know which daughter to glare at first. There wouldn't be any shouting, though. They were in public, and their father never shouted in public. It was why Dorcas liked bringing things like this up when they were out.

Edgar took a deep breath and wondered vaguely what he'd actually agreed to when invited to this dinner. "Dorcas," he said again, a little more freaked out this time. It was bad enough hearing her say these sorts of things in the presence of their circle of friends.

"What? You brought me flowers," she said with a grin. "I wanted to say thank you."

All of the coloured drained from Edgar's face.

"Dorcas, sweet Jesus, hold your tongue," Joanne said, exasperated.

Well, she hadn't gotten noticed when she'd tried her version of being good, but she sure as hell got noticed now, though she supposed it was probably a little unfair to Edgar. "Oh look, the waiter. I'll have the lobster, please, unless you've gotten a new most expensive dish since I've been here last. Fuck, have I ever missed the country club. And can you bring me another soda? I'm just _parched_. What'll you have, Bonesie?"

Edgar put his face in his hands and muttered, "A little dignity, please," to his fingers.

"I think he means the chicken parmesan," Dorcas said, rubbing Ed's thigh in what she hoped was taken as an unspoken apology.

Okay, so maybe she'd crossed a line. She just... sort of forgot herself--and all of the promises she'd made to herself in her head about being good--when she was around her family. She couldn't help it. They just... expected it of her so much by now that they didn't even notice when she made the effort. Sure, she was still a bit casual, but she was wearing a skirt, and it was loads better than every other time she'd been to the country club since she was thirteen and started picking out her own clothes. But it was just... never enough. It was never a big enough step. There was always something wrong with her, with who she was, and it made her want to scream sometimes, so she did this. She rebelled.

"I will have the New York Steak, please. Medium rare, with a baked potato, light on the sour cream and heavy on the bacon bits," Daniel said. He hadn't even picked up his menu. He almost always got the same thing.

"The same for me," Brian added.

"Shrimp alfredo," Joanne added. "And another glass of wine, please."

"The same, minus the wine," Gillian said.

Edgar took another deep breath. They were all so eerily the same.

The waiter just nodded and disappeared, never uttering a word. They were trained to be unobtrusive here, and Dorcas sometimes went out back for smoke breaks and got all the best gossip out of them. They knew everything about everyone.

It was quiet for a moment, and Dorcas began making popping noises with her lips. Part of her wanted to keep right on shocking her way through the conversation, but part of her wanted to be good for Ed. She decided to try the road less travelled this time and kept quiet.

"So. Brian. You've been made partner. That must come with a substantial salary increase," Daniel said seriously. "Are you planning on having children any time soon? You can definitely afford it, you know, and Joanne and I had Gillian about the age you two are now."

"We're in no hurry," Brian answered. "No need to rush into anything. And it's not as though there aren't plenty of children out there already."

Gillian smiled bemusedly. "The number of teen pregnancies in this area of late... Did you here that last year there were three pregnant girls at the prep school? And they weren't even expelled!"

Edgar felt a quick burst of anger but kept his mouth shut. Sometimes it was just easier to let people say stupid things.

"Oh yes, I know," Dorcas chimed in, lacking Edgar's self-control. "It's such a dreadful tragedy the establishment didn't ruin their lives and make it even fucking harder for them to get a job when they need it to support a baby. I know what this country needs most is a higher amount of the population forced onto assistance, even though the three women in question are some of the smartest fucking girls I've ever met and they all could've had their pick of unis."

"You _know_ them, Dorcas?" Daniel said. "I don't really think it's good for you to be consorting with those sort of people."

"How do you even know what sort of people they are? You've never met them," Dorcas replied angrily. "But you're right. I've obviously spent way too much time with them, because I suddenly have the urge to get knocked up. Fancy a quickie in the loo, Eddie?"

Edgar snorted out loud at that and couldn't help but smile. "Lily, Alice and Narcissa are very capable women, despite their age. I've been friends with all of them for quite a long time and I see their children quite often. Three boys, all plump and healthy."

Gillian scoffed. "Plump and healthy doesn't have anything to do with _anything_. They found themselves in that position unintentionally, thus they're stupid."

Edgar ears burnt red and said, "Two of the girls were on birth control when they got pregnant. The other well... she's a special case, she was, ah... sleeping with the sex ed. instructor..."

"Edie's girl?" Joanne chimed in.

"Yes ma'am."

"From what I hear, she got pregnant on purpose to make sure the dude would stick around," Dorcas said. "You've got to admire her passion. That girl has a lot of fucking nerve."

"The way I see it, the fellow should've just left her to it on her own," Daniel commented. "Obviously he wasn't invested in the situation--affairs like that only happen for one reason. He'd be better to wash his hands of her and let her clean up her own mess."

Edgar quirked an eyebrow. "You're seriously suggesting...? They were together for two years before she got pregnant and now they're getting married, not because he feels it's necessary, but because he _wants_ to. I spoke to him at New Years and most of the conversation was about their son."

"Well, obviously he was tricked into it," Daniel said. "Either that, or he's just lacking in backbone. He deserves it if it just can't say no to a pretty face and crying baby."

"Are you actually fucking saying you think he's foolish for loving his own child?" Dorcas said. "Daddy, honestly. Shut up before you embarrass yourself."

"Dorcas Meadowes, you show some respect when speaking to me. I'm your father," Daniel said sternly. "And of course not. I'm saying he was weak enough to let himself be hoodwinked because he lost sight of logic."

"You're being completely ridiculous," Edgar said. "Affairs might start out being solely about sex, but that doesn't mean they can't become something stronger. If it had been just about sex, I seriously doubt it would've gone on so long. Use your own logic. I mean, if we go by what you're suggesting, every man in history has been tricked into 'loving' something because of a set of tits and the wiggle of her hips. That's just ludicrous."

"Got you there, hasn't he?" Dorcas said smugly, giving Ed a proud smile. She'd never seen her father speechless before, but he was sitting there looking stunned with his jaw clamped tightly shut. "And you can't even talk your way out of that one, Daddy. Maybe Ed should go into law, Brian, what do you think? Do you have any internships open?"

Brian looked quite impressed. "He needs a little refining, but he's got possibilities. Ever think about a working man's career, Edgar?"

***

"Now, feel free to call us blasphemers, but we don't say grace here, Dorcas," Joseph said with a grin. "We just say _dig in_!"

Dorcas snorted. "Oh, I'm not big on grace either. I'm going to hell anyway. There's no point pretending otherwise."

"So you think you're a bad person, then?" Jon asked with an expression of exaggerated interest before anyone else could respond to Dorcas' comment.

"Jon!" Anna admonished, tutting and shaking her head. "What sort of question is that to ask a young lady?"

"Relax, Ma. She suggested it, not me. I'm just curious," Jon said with a grin. "After all, no one knows Dorcas better than Dorcas does. I bet Amelia would like to know too."

"It's okay, Mrs. Bones. They're curious, I get that," Dorcas said with a small, wicked smile. She was being tested, Ed had said, so she could have a little fun with it now. "It's just, bad and good are such black and white ideas. Maybe if you or Amelia have any more specific questions... You know, like about my criminal record or my medical history or something. Oh, and Perry, could you pass me the pot roast? I'm starved."

Edgar snorted on his water, just as Amelia said, "Fine then. Have you ever been arrested?"

Dorcas grinned as she took the pot roast from an amused looking Perry and helped herself. "Yeah. A couple times. I'm into activism, and we do stuff that's illegal. It's called civil disobedience." Who was Amelia kidding, anyway? She was head of the Kingsbridge Conservation Society, wasn't she? She knew all about the Order. "I've never been charged, though. And prison so isn't as hot as it is in the movies. I wasn't even in the same holding cell as Ed, was I Bonesie?"

"You're one of them, then? That little group Eddie's in?" Joseph asked with a smile. He was used to his children acting like this, and he and Anna hadn't really expected anything less. Dorcas seemed to be holding her own though. "And I'll have the pot roast next."

"You always take all the good pieces, Pa," Jon complained loudly, failing as he attempted to intercept the dish.

"We don't talk about Eddie's _group_ , Daddy, remember?" Amelia reminded. "Not that everyone in the family doesn't know you're in it anyway."

"Right, top secret," Joseph said with a grin, miming zipping his lips shut just to open them the very next second to take a huge bite of food.

Perry took advantage of the lull in the conversation and jumped in to say, "Anna, this food is amazing. Amelia'll never want to leave and go back to my cooking."

"You've always been a flatterer, Perry," Anna said fondly, "But I've told you a million times you're not getting my recipes until you and Amelia settle on a date for the wedding."

Just then, a soft, metallic crying baby sound filled the room, and Jon reached over to unclip the baby monitor from Sherry's belt. "Sounds like Susan is awake. Dorcas, why don't you go get her? She's in the upstairs bedroom. Second door on your left."

Dorcas just stared at Jon for a moment, and then raised her eyebrows. "You want _me_ to go get your child?"

Sherry smiled. "Well you're practically family, love. No trouble, right?"

Perry just shook his head at them. Now _Sherry_ was joining in? Didn't she remember how initiation had gone for her? Sure, maybe Dorcas was getting off easy with a family dinner when Perry himself had had a weekend camping trip in which he'd had to rough it in more ways than one, but still. He thought she ought to have some sympathy. Idly, he wondered what Sherry's initiation had been. She was before his time, and he'd never asked.

"Don't worry, Dorcas. Susan loves bright colours. She'll have a ball with your hair," Perry said, trying to be helpful.

"Joy," Dorcas said, and got up from the table. Whatever. She could do babies. She even _liked_ kids, though she'd never admit it.

She climbed the stairs two at a time and opened the door slowly once she reached it. The crying ceased immediately and there was a baby, about the same age as Harry and Neville, looking up at her through wide eyes from the crib.

"Well hello there. Aren't you a pretty one," she said softly, scooping the kid into her arms. Sure enough, the kid reached for Dorcas' hair straight away. "The colour is called _siren_. You know what a siren is?" Dorcas picked up the baby monitor then, and spoke right into it. "It's a mythological name for a girl who can kick all your arses and make you love it. Oh, and Jon, your daughter loves me."

With that, she clicked off the device and set it down, walking down the stairs with Susan on her hip. "One baby delivery for the happy couple."

Sherry took Susan from Dorcas and smiled. "Thanks," she said.

"Dor's handled kids before," Edgar was saying. "Even changed a few of Harry's nappies with a little supervision from Lily."

"Don't get any ideas, though," Dorcas said darkly as she took her spot next to Ed. "I do draw the line somewhere."

"Well, I'd say you've been a pretty good sport so far, wouldn't you?" Joseph asked with a chuckle, giving Jon and Amelia a pointed look. "Anyone want some more mashed potatoes?"

"Right here," Amelia said, taking the bowl from her father. "Do you want any kids of your own someday Dorcas?"

"I don't know," Dorcas shrugged. She'd almost slipped there. It was really hard not to talk like she usually did, and they all probably fucking thought she had a slight stutter or something. "I'm sixteen. I'll start thinking about stuff like that when I'm twenty-five."

"Ed loves kids, don't you Eddie?" Amelia said, smiling. "When Susan was born first he wanted to do everything with her. Like a little kid on Christmas morning, he was."

Edgar blushed and said. "I'm not in any hurry, Ames. And it's not as though you have any either."

"We both work too much right now to have children. Maybe in a year or two," Perry said casually, though really it was more her holding things up than him. He would've loved to try for a kid. "So Dorcas. What do you want to do with your life?"

"I want to be a tattoo artist," she answered quickly. "I want to own my own parlour in London, but not right away, obviously. I want to try and work for Mad-Eye Moody first, which will be, just... amazing. I'm hoping he'll, like, teach me. I'll be famous before I even get my feet wet."

Amelia cocked an eyebrow. "A tattoo artist? Really? Do you have any?"

"Uh," Dorcas said, stalling. No point lying. Great first impression, Dorcas. "Yeah. I have some small stars and a big tiger. I plan to get more soon."

"Can I see them? The tattoos I mean?" Anna asked.

"Well, I can't show you the tiger because I'd have to take off my trousers and get personal," Dorcas said, hoping that if she was casual with it, they wouldn't make a big deal either. She lifted her foot and pulled up the pant leg a little to show the purple, blue, and turquoise stars on her ankle. "These are the stars, though. They're kind of new."

"You're sixteen and you have a tattoo that requires _getting personal_ to see?" Jon said. When Dorcas just shrugged and met his eyes without any apology in her face, he smiled and relented. "To each their own."

"It's quite a piece of work," Edgar commented, recalling the first time he'd seen it when they'd gotten drunk at her parent's house. "Very impressive."

Amelia snorted. "Yes, I bet you find Dorcas' personal areas impressive, eh Eddie?"

"She's still sitting right next to me Ames," Edgar said, quirking an eyebrow. "And none of you are stupid, so whatever's implied is implied. How's that?"

"Edgar, Amelia, be polite, the both of you," Anna reprimanded.

Rolling her eyes Amelia said, "Yeah, yeah. Anyway, who's "Mad-Eye" Moody, exactly? Can't say I've heard of him."

" _Who_ is Mad-Eye Moody?" Dorcas repeated, the question effectively distracting her from grinning wickedly at her boyfriend. "Only my idol, more or less. He's from around here. Salcombe or Kingsbridge, but he's been in London ever since he was young. He started tattooing when he was like, 16 or something. He did all of Sid Vicious' tattoos, and even a couple for Ozzy Osbourne. He's like, elite, especially in the grunge punk scene. And I've _met_ him. Of course, he's crazy now, but still a genius. He's agreed to do some tattoos for me."

"Well, I've never heard of him either, but then, I'm hardly knowledgeable when it comes to the ' _grunge punk scene_ ' or anything," Jon said. "What tattoos are you planning on getting?"

"I don't know yet, but I'm trying to convince Ed to get one with me," Dorcas said brightly.

"And I keep telling you that it's useless to bother," Edgar replied, grinning slightly. "It's all fine and dandy for you, but what on Earth would I even get tattooed on myself?"

"How about my name?" Dorcas teased. "You know, Marlene has 'Gideon was here' tattooed on her bum? I never would've pegged her for the sort. Of course, she was drunk."

"I'm not putting 'Dorcas was here' on my arse," Edgar said. "And when did you see Marlene's bum?"

"I used to be a lesbian, Bonesie," Dorcas reminded him. "Lesbians know things about other girls' bums."

Everyone around the table fell into a shocked silence, staring at Dorcas with surprise. Sherry dropped her fork.

"You were... what?" Amelia asked.

***

"So. Edgar. I understand you've graduated already," Daniel said gruffly after a moment of silence. "Are you considering going into law, or was Dorcas just being frivolous?"

"I'm not really considering anything right now, to be honest," Edgar answered. "I'm just working and trying to figure out what it is I really want to do."

"And where are you working right now?" Brian asked curiously.

Edgar blushed. "Um, I'm a janitor at the community centre."

"Cleans up puke without even batting an eye and lets me in free to all the functions I want to go to," Dorcas said with a grin. "It's really win-win as far as jobs go. Well, for me anyway. He has to clean up puke on a fairly regular basis."

"You're a janitor," Daniel said, and Dorcas could see him tilting his head up so as to better look down his nose at Ed. "How quaint."

Edgar cleared his throat. "It's a good job. Good pay, good hours, benefits, all that. My folks aren't exactly. Um. _Able_ , to pay for me to go to school, so I'm saving up myself, just like my sister and brother did."

"Well, I suppose that is admirable," Daniel said grudgingly.

"Life is so fucking odd. My parents could pay for ten years of school if I wanted to go for ten years, but I won't even fucking go at all, and you want to go, and can't until you work to save money," Dorcas mused. "Oh, look. Food!"

"It's just as well," Edgar said as the waiter handed out their orders. "I don't have a clue what I want to do yet, so this gives me time to figure that out."

"Well you're young yet. You have a world of opportunities at your fingertips," Brian said optimistically.

"Dorcas, dear, you should take a leaf out of Edgar's book," Joanne commented airily. "You could use a job yourself."

Dorcas looked up at her mother, pausing with her fork halfway to her mouth. "Uh, what the fuck for? You guys give me all the money I need, and I go to school _and_ volunteer."

"Causing problems for hardworking people and getting yourself in trouble with the law all the time isn't volunteering, Dorcas," Daniel replied sharply. "It's called being a delinquent."

"Fine. Then I'm busy with school and delinquency, and I still have all the money I need," Dorcas sneered through a full mouth.

"Well what if we stopped giving you money?" Joanne asked.

"Then I'd get a fucking job, wouldn't I," Dorcas said casually. It didn't really matter to her. "And I'd still be a delinquent, so really it would just cut into my homework time, and don't you think my grades are low enough already?"

"Any lower and you won't even get into a community college," Daniel commented lightly, as though he thought if he said it like it was an off-the-cuff remark, Dorcas wouldn't argue.

"How many fucking times have I said I'm not _going_ to college? You guys _never fucking listen_ ," Dorcas spat.

Joanne sighed and said, "Dorcas, you're _going_ to college or you're not going anywhere in life, end of discussion!"

"Well if it's _your_ fucking life I have to have, I don't want to go anywhere in it anyway!" Dorcas declared.

Daniel cleared his throat. "We've talked about this many times, Dorcas. We just want you to have a plan for your life."

"I do have a plan," Dorcas said sullenly, sinking in her chair. She _did_ have a plan. It just wasn't the sort of plan her parents wanted her to have.

"You're sixteen. You're going to grow out of your rebellious phase, and then you'll want to do something with your life," Daniel said with the air of someone reporting irrefutable facts. "Don't cut off your other opportunities because of a silly little whim."

"It's not a fucking whim. I've wanted to do this for two years," Dorcas said pointedly. And anyway, she had a B average. She could get into a couple different colleges with a B average. Nothing was ever good enough for her parents, was all. They wanted her to be perfect like _Gillian_. "Did you know Gillian stole your car once while you were out of town? She drove all the way to fucking Kingsbridge with her friends to meet these older guys. She told me if I ever told you, she'd lock me in my room next time you went away and not give me food."

"Dorcas!" Gillian hissed.

"This isn't about your sister, Dorcas, this is about you and you're complete disregard of common sense!" Joanne said. "You set realistic goals, not stupid ones. Isn't that right, Edgar?"

Edgar, who'd been hiding in his seat slightly, jumped at being addressed. "Me? I, well, I think that if Dorcas wants to be a tattoo artist she should be a tattoo artist." He shrugged.

"I don't think you have any right to encourage our daughter not to go to university," Daniel said sharply. "She doesn't need someone in her life who supports her frivolous ideas. She needs someone sensible who..."

" _She_ is sitting right here," Dorcas interrupted. "And _she_ thinks you don't have any right to snap at Ed. At least he fucking supports me. When I told him I got a perfect mark on my art project, he said, 'Good job, Princess. You're so good with details.' When I pinned my grade up on the fridge, you left a fucking note about how if I worked that hard in maths, I would be excelling instead of _just passing_. I have a B in that class, by the way, and that's more than just passing. It isn't my fault if nothing is ever fucking good enough for you. And Mother, for the record, I did fucking dress up. I'm wearing a fucking skirt for fucks sake. And I'm leaving."

"Sit down," Daniel commanded as soon as Dorcas pushed her chair out. "We are having a family dinner, and you will sit down and finish it. Gillian, why don't you tell us how your job is going."

"She looks at teeth all day and holds the fucking suction thing for the real dentist," Dorcas said loftily, sitting back down even if she didn't want to. She was so angry her hands were shaking. "I'm sure it's boring as shit, as usual."

"Well at least I'm doing something credible," Gillian shot back, her cheeks burning.

"Your sister _made_ something of herself, Dorcas," Joanne continued. "What happened to my little girl?"

"Do you just fucking rewrite history to suit yourself?" Dorcas asked. "Just because you played dress up like I was a doll doesn't change the fact that I wanted to be a fucking alien and a race car driver and a Charlie's Angel. Am I really that much of a fucking disappointment that you've completely made up a whole new child in your head? Why do you want so fucking badly for me to be someone else?"

"You're just capable of so much more than you think you are, Dorcas," Joanne said. "A tattoo person... that's a suitable profession for someone like Edgar but for you..."

"Someone like me?" Edgar interrupted.

"Don't be so fucking snobby and judgemental. You don't know the first thing about what kind of person Edgar is," Dorcas said shakily. Sure, the way they talked to her hurt, but at least she was used to it. Ed was the best thing in her life right now, and she didn't want to hear them start in like she knew they would.

"No, hold on, Dorcas," Edgar said. "What do you mean, someone like me?"

"Well, I," Joanne faltered. She licked her lips. "Someone of a... lower class."

"Shut _up_ , Mother," Dorcas said, dropping her head into her hands.

"Right..." Edgar started slowly. "So what's the point of this bullshit? What's the point of inviting the two of us here when you think I'm a bum and that your daughter's a disappointment? Why deal with it at all? Never mind that my father is so well respected in Salcombe that he was elected to council. Never mind that my mother runs the United Mothers society, and organizes pretty much every charity run that goes through this town. Never _mind_ that Dorcas is a beautiful, unique and talented individual, and that I love every quirk she has and that you should too." Somewhere during his speech Edgar had gotten to his feet. His fists were closed and his face red with anger and he blew air out of his nose before continuing. "I didn't come here to listen to you talk shit about me or my girlfriend."

Dorcas, who had honestly been near tears for a moment there, couldn't help but smile at Edgar as she stood next to him.

"Sit down, both of you," Daniel instructed, his knuckles white with the grip he had on his steak knife.

"No, I don't think we shall," Dorcas replied snottily. She turned to Ed and wrapped her arms around his waist. "I'll treat us to take out, and we can go hang out in your basement and watch poorly translated kung fu movies. How's that sound for a good night?"

"Anything sounds better than this," Edgar answered.

Joanne had sat gaping at Edgar during his speech and she looked from her husband to her youngest daughter to Edgar with disbelief and said, "If you leave, Dorcas..."

"If I leave _what_? Are you going to give me an ultimatum, honestly?" Dorcas asked. "How about this. How about I don't come home until you both apologize to me and Bonesie, how does that sound?"

Joanne shook her head. "No. Just don't come home. Get your stuff, leave your key, and don't bother to come back. "

Dorcas stared at her mother for a moment, the smile falling off of her face. "Are you... are you serious?"

"You have no respect, Dorcas," Daniel said. He loved his daughter. He always would, but she needed to be taught a lesson, and Daniel had to stand by his wife. It would be improper to disagree. "You don't appreciate all we give you. You don't take advantage of all the opportunities we afford you. It's..."

Dorcas squared her shoulders and nodded. "No, it's fine. You don't have to explain anymore. I get it. I don't fit into your stupid fucking ideas of what I should be. It's fine. I hate you anyway."

It was funny, but before tonight, Dorcas had thought she'd been getting along better with her parents. Sure, they still fought, but she'd been trying harder. She was growing up. Apparently they hadn't noticed, though, and it had all been in her head. Things had been just as bad as ever, in her parents' eyes.

Without another word, Dorcas just turned and stormed from the room, assuming Ed would follow her. She couldn't stand to look at them a minute longer. Any of them. Gilly and Brian hadn't even... well, she shouldn't be surprised they weren't willing to go head-to-head with their parents on her account.

Edgar took one last look at Dorcas' family, and then followed her out of the room.

***

"...So it was sort of messy, I guess, what with Katie walking in the next morning and me breaking up with her, so really I think it's understandable that it took me a few days to sort it all out and figure out what I wanted," Dorcas finished explaining. Everyone at the table had listened quietly to a slightly toned down version of how Dorcas had fallen for Ed, and thus realized she wasn't a lesbian. "Some people were really shocked, and others just sort of said I told you so. Apparently they thought I had a thing for Gideon or something. Yeah right."

"Gideon Prewett?" Amelia questioned. "Really?"

"Yeah," Dorcas said, nodding. "Don't worry though. It's not true. I'm all about Ed here."

"Well," Joseph said slowly. "I guess we ought to be thankful for that. I've never seen Ed happier'n these last few months."

Anna nodded happily. "It's very true. Since you two got together he's practically been glowing."

"Ma," Edgar admonished, smiling sheepishly.

"Aw, is wittle Eddie in wuv?" Amelia teased.

"Don't suppose you ought to get too attached though, Eddie," Jon said casually. "How serious can a sixteen-year-old ex-lezzie be?"

"Jon!" Joe said. "You be nice, you little rat."

"No, it's fine," Dorcas said quickly. "He thinks I'm confused, right? That Ed is just an experiment or something, or that I'm going to change my mind again and leave him out in the cold. Right?"

"I'm just looking out for my little brother," Jon said carefully. "If you're messing with him, he obviously doesn't realize that. The little twit is going to get his heart broken if he's not careful."

"Right," Dorcas said, nodding. "Oh, and go fuck yourself."

Edgar grinned. "Twit, am I? Oh I dunno, Jon, I think I picked myself one who can take you on. I should be set."

"Sorry about the language because I know there are little ears in the room," Dorcas said, smiling in Sherry and Susan's direction. "But honestly, Jon. You've been so focussed on testing me, you've not even been paying attention."

"I don't think I follow you," Jon said, wearing a rueful smile. It seemed Edgar was right.

Dorcas rolled her eyes and then took a bite of dinner, washing it down with some juice before explaining. "Well for starters, I wore an ugly blazer. There's a glaring sign right there that I care enough to make the effort. Plus, I've hardly sworn at all, which _trust me_ , is a big, huge, mammoth thing for me. Never mind that I've been _completely_ honest, even when it would've been just as easy to lie or leave things out to make a good impression, which means I'm not dicking the lot of you around. If you honestly think, despite all that, that I might still be faking it for the sake of playing a few games for the hetero team, you've obviously got an attic light burnt out."

Amelia was grinning broadly now and said, "I think she's got us right where she wants us, Jon. What do you say?"

"I say welcome to the family," Jon said.

"Thanks," Dorcas said.

"We aren't even finished dinner yet!" Perry protested laughingly. "You lot put me through a whole _weekend_."

"Yes, but you weren't loud and obnoxious," Edgar said. "You kept quiet the whole time and looked like you thought we were all nutters."

"Besides," Amelia said, "It's not as bad as what Eddie and I put Sherry through."

Sherry rolled her eyes, "Ugh, don't remind me."

"Uh, I'm not obnoxious," Dorcas said with a relaxed grin, poking Ed in the side for his comment. "And what'd you do to Sherry?"

"It was horrible. I thought she was going to break up with me," Jon said, leaning over and kissing her on the cheek. "I thank my lucky stars every day that she didn't. And hey, at least if our relationship can withstand a rotten sister dyeing her hair _green_ two days before our wedding, and an evil brother _hiding the cake_ , it can withstand anything."

"It was an ugly cake," Edgar said. "You could've done without it."

"And green suited Sherry's complexion so nicely," Amelia added. "And she got it out, didn't she?"

"No woman needs extra stress before her wedding day," Jon admonished. "If you'd have ruined it for her, I would've murdered you both. You know, maybe we're letting Dorcas off too easy."

"Well you can't do anything else _now_ ," Joseph said with a loud laugh. "And besides, she is the only one who didn't sit back and take it. She might even be the only one who didn't cry."

"I did _not_ cry!" Perry hollered, laughing. "I was sleep deprived and hungry and I may have gotten a little hysterical, but I never cried!"

"I saw some manly tears," Sherry said, smiling wryly. "And I thought you lot really hated me. I even punched Edgar in the stomach."

"It was a very girly punch," Edgar said. "And I laughed at her."

"Fuck, Bonesie, your family is so much better than mine," Dorcas sighed softly. "I'd ask you to trade me, but after tomorrow I'll bet you won't want to be anywhere fucking near them."

"Why, what's happening tomorrow?" Amelia asked curiously.

"Dinner at the country club with Dor's family," Edgar answered. "She tells me it's going to be dreadful."

"Well, it _is_ ," Dorcas insisted. "You don't know my parents. And Gillian is going to be there, and whenever she and I are in the same room, it's like they just can't help pointing out how much better she is than me." After a short pause, Dorcas looked up and smiled rakishly, assuring everyone, "In their opinions, anyway. I think she's stodgy and stuffy and boring, and obviously I'm way more fabulous than she is."

"Just go in with an open mind, dear," Anna said thoughtfully. "Whatever happens happens."

"Yeah, I guess," Dorcas sighed. "There's no way it'll be as fun as tonight, though. Ed's lucky to have the lot of you. I even like Jon and Amelia, I swear."

"Lies," Jon laughed. "Now everyone eat faster. I want dessert!"

***

Pulling into the driveway and turning off the engine, Edgar looked at Dorcas. She hadn't cried yet, and he'd been certain she would've by now. Instead she was staring off into the distance, distracted, with a box full of CDs in her lap.

"Mum and Dad won't mind," Edgar assured her. "Really. I mean, you need to go somewhere..."

Dorcas nodded absently, but just sunk lower into her seat instead of getting out. "Just give me a minute to breathe. It's just... a fucking _lot_ to take in, you know?"

"I know," Edgar said softly, and leaned over enough to kiss Dorcas on the forehead. "And it'll be alright. They do love you. They won't hold out forever."

Dorcas leaned into Ed gratefully, mumbling, "I love you so, so, so much, you know that?"

"I love you, too, Princess," Edgar replied, smiling. "Now come on. We'll leave your stuff here and go talk to Mum, okay?"

"Yeah, all right," Dorcas said. She took one more deep breath, steeling herself, before she opened the door and stepped out, walking with determination towards the front door. She knew it was Ed's house and he was right behind her, but for some reason she pushed the doorbell anyway.

Edgar reached for the doorknob just as his mother opened the door, and looked in surprise at the both of them. "I thought you two were supposed to be at the country club? And what are you doing ringing doorbells? Get in here out of the cold, come on," she said, standing back and letting them pass by her.

Dorcas knew she'd never be able to say it if she didn't just _say it_ , and since she thought she should be able to just say it, she decided to just spit it out. "So we kind of got in a fight with my parents--long fucking story and I can so fill you in on the history and details later--but the basic gist of it is they told me to get my shit, leave my key, and not come back. So, you know. All of my stuff is in Ed's car right now. So, um. I don't really... have anywhere else to go."

Anna blinked in surprise. "Wait, dear, did you just say your parents told you to... _leave_?"

"Yeah, they did," Edgar said.

Anna shook her head and sighed. "I'll never understand how some people decide to parent... Of course you're more than welcome to stay here sweetheart, we'd never turn you away. So long as it takes for you to sort things out, think of this house as home, alright?"

Dorcas just nodded and leaned back into Edgar, not trusting her voice at the moment. She should say thank you, she knew that, but if even _had_ to think about the fact that Ed's mum was more accepting of her than her own parents, she was pretty sure she'd just start crying. Instead she just cleared her throat and asked, "Is it okay if I unpack later? Just... I don't know if I can, right now."

"Don't worry about it, dear," Anna said. "I'll have Joseph bring it in for you when he gets home. You two go on downstairs; I'll bring you some supper."

"Thanks, ma," Edgar said as he wrapped an arm around Dorcas' shoulder. "You're the best."

"Flattery won't get you extra helpings Edgar Bones," Anna teased, smiling sadly. "Now shoo, go on."

Dorcas nodded again--she was starting to wonder if she looked like one of those bobble head dolls--and walked downstairs with Ed. She could feel her eyes getting more and more watery with every step, and finally, a few feet away from his bed, she just stopped and turned to him, wiping her eyes.

"Your mum is so amazing," she said, sniffling. "I hate my parents. I hate them."

Edgar pulled her tightly into his arms, bending enough to kiss the top of her head. "It'll be okay, Princess," he said, rubbing circles on her back, wondering how it was possible for Dorcas' parents to ignore how wonderful she really was. He'd never understand that, and he was thankful. Dorcas was right. His mum was amazing, and she always had been. She was supportive, encouraging and understanding. She let each of her children live their own lives, find their own paths, and make their own mistakes.

Feeling overwhelmed on all fronts, Dorcas couldn't help but let out a sob. There was just so much on her plate right now, and then all _this_ on top of it, and she had to tell Ed, she _had_ to. Even if just _thinking_ about it made her want to throw up all over his bedroom.

"Now that we're, I mean. Now that I'm here, living with you, I should... I have to tell you..." Dorcas stopped, and took a deep breath, squeezing her eyes shut for a moment before wrapping her arms tightly around Ed and burying her face in his chest. "Just, fuck. Okay. Look. You remember how at dinner we were talking about Lily and shit and I told my dad I thought you should knock me up? Well, I'm pretty sure I'm pregnant. Don't tell your parents yet, okay?"


	12. So Lovely (February 19th, 2007)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Where Edgar and Dorcas got some 'splainin' to do, James and Lily are raising a future superstar, and Gideon and Marlene cross a broken bridge.

Edgar was surprised he hadn't hit a fire hydrant yet.

They'd left the doctor's office about ten minutes before and were about three minutes away from Arthur Weasley's house and an Order meeting. They'd both been unnaturally quiet since leaving the house that morning (for there was always the _possibility_ that Dorcas _wasn't_ and that it might've been a _false alarm_ ), and hadn't spoke a word to one another since the doctor with his stupid smiling face had told them, "Congratulations Mr. and Mrs. Bones! You're going to have a baby!"

Were it not for the circumstances, the entire visit would've been extremely laughable. But no... oh no. Eight months ago Edgar was pining away for Dorcas the lesbian and now Dorcas his girlfriend was going to have his child.

While Dorcas couldn't think of anything she actually _wanted_ to say, the quiet was slowly driving her crazy. It was enough. She had to break it. She had to say _something_. Anything. Now, before she totally panicked and lost it. It was almost like there were so many things going through her mind, she couldn't decide which one to spit out first.

"I'll get an abortion, if you want," she declared suddenly. "If that's... if that's what's best. I won't be fucking stupid and emotional about it, either."

Edgar's head was spinning. He pulled into the driveway behind Sirius' motorbike and didn't answer until he had stopped completely and was sure he wasn't going to puke all over the place. "No. I don't think, I... No." He swallowed tightly and took a deep breath. "I mean... do _you_ want to do that? Or do you want to have it?"

Ignoring the question entirely, Dorcas took a deep breath. She'd been doing a lot of thinking and now she had some questions. "Pretend I'm not fucking pregnant. Pretend it was a false alarm. Do you think we'd last? Do you think that in five years from now, we'd still be together or whatever, and living happily ever after in London somewhere? Do you think you'd still fucking want me forever and ever if you didn't feel like you were fucking obligated? Because if that's what having it means--just a fucking obligation to me--then no, I don't want it. I don't want anything to fucking _do_ with it."

Edgar rubbed his eyes with the palms of his hands. "Princess, I love you. That hasn't changed, and that's not _going_ to change. _We're_ going to change constantly for the rest of our lives and I... I can't guarantee you anything. I can tell you that it's what I want, and what I would always be working toward... making a life with you that is. Marrying you, having a family, whatever. I'm not going to lie, this is happening a lot earlier than I would like it to, but it's not an _obligation_. It's something I wanted us to experience together. Eventually."

Dorcas wanted it. She wanted it so badly.

"We'd be fucking stupid to keep it. We can't afford it. I don't have a job and I'm still in school. My parents just kicked me out, for fucks sake, and we live in your parents' basement. I think it's a really fucking bad idea," Dorcas said blandly, and then she turned to Ed and smiled. "But I want it. If you do. If I don't have to do it without you."

Edgar smiled back. "We've completely lost our minds, but... yes. Lets do it. Lets have our baby."

"Ed. Eddie. Bonesie," Dorcas said, unbuckling and crawling across the seat towards Ed, kissing him. "We're insane. Your mother is going to throw a fucking shit fit."

"That's alright. Amelia and Jon are going to piss themselves laughing at us," Edgar said. "Holy crap, Dor. A _baby_."

"Ugh. I can't think about it anymore. Let's go inside and, like, just fucking deal with the meeting or else we'll never fucking stop talking about it," Dorcas said, shimmying back across the seat and opening her door. If she thought about it anymore right now, she'd start planning. If she started planning, she'd have a breakdown. They had to do the Order thing first, and then they could talk all they wanted about the baby. The Baby. Christ. "Seriously, let's go inside before I explode."

"Yeah, alright," Edgar said, climbing out of his side. He met her by the basement door and slid what he hoped was a comforting arm around her waist before pulling the door open and allowing Dorcas to lead them inside.

"You're early?" Fabian gasped dramatically. "Dorcas Meadowes is _early_? Did you perhaps ride here on one of the horses of the apocalypse?"

"Shut the fuck up, you drama queen," Dorcas called, kicking her shoes off and making her way to the couch. "Are we waiting for anyone?"

"James and Lily aren't here yet," Remus spoke up. "They don't smoke anymore, though, so it doesn't matter if we pass some around without them here. Sirius brought some to share."

Edgar cleared his throat. "Um, ah. Do we have to? Pass it around, I mean? We do it enough, you know, we could do to... Um. Take a... break." Everyone was staring at him surprised and he just shrugged and tried really hard not to look at Dorcas.

Dorcas made a face at him. Oh fuck. No more weed. "Just because I'm sick as fuck doesn't mean the rest of you can't indulge. Go ahead, I'll just go have a cig while you all toke."

Edgar ran a hand through his hair and leaned back in his chair looking at Dorcas. He shook his head. Smoking was a no-no too.

"Seriously?" she asked under breath. "This fucking _blows_."

"What the fuck is wrong with you two?" Sirius asked, confused.

"What blows, exactly?" Fabian asked, feeling no qualms about commenting on something she'd obviously intended only for Ed. The way Fay saw it, the Order--especially the core--was family, and family was allowed to be nosy.

Dorcas looked over at Ed. They hadn't said they _weren't_ going to tell anyone, but they hadn't said they were, either. "Nothing. Just... uh, Ed is helping me quit."

"Oh that's bullshit," Sirius said, quirking an eyebrow. "You're hiding something Dorcas."

"Yeah, I am," Dorcas said suddenly, realizing something else she hadn't told anyone yet. "My parents kicked me out on my fucking arse. I moved into Ed's basement with him yesterday."

"Oh no, really?" Marlene asked as she came into the room from the bathroom and took her seat as far away from Gideon as possible. "Are you all right?"

"Who the fuck are you talking to? Of course I'm all right," Dorcas said with a grin. "I'm tough. It sucked living at home anyway."

"I'm really sorry to hear that, Dorcas, but, ah," Remus started, looking apologetic for prying even as he spoke. "What exactly does that have to do with quitting smoking?"

"And Ed's new vendetta against smoking weed?" Sirius asked.

"You guys are making a big fucking deal out of nothing," Dorcas said with a small smile. Her brain was still on repeat, and it was like a fifty person choir in her head singing, _baby, baby, baby, baby, baby_.

"Well, you're smiling, so it isn't lung cancer," Fabian said thoughtfully. "Why else do people who love smoking quit cold turkey?"

"Because there are more important things, that's why!" James called from the doorway. "Is it baby safe down there? My son is going to play footie for England, and asthma would _really_ throw a wrench in things."

"Holy fuck!" Sirius said, his smile going wide as he looked between Edgar and Dorcas' guilty, guilty faces. "She's pregnant! You are, aren't you, Dor?"

"Shut up, shut up, shut up," Dorcas said, grinning now. "We just found out today, you'll ruin it!"

Fabian clapped his hands together and grinned, rolling his eyes dramatically. "Babies, babies everywhere! You just _had_ to jump on the bandwagon, didn't you Dor?"

Edgar was trying not to beam proudly because in all seriousness (and as exciting as it was) well, "We didn't exactly do it on purpose, you sod."

Fabian waved Edgar's words away and got up from his beanbag chair, moving to sit on the couch and bend down to press an ear to Dorcas' stomach. "You girls get to have all the fun," he joked.

Dorcas laughed. "You idiot, you won't be able to hear anything. It's like, not even two fucking weeks old."

"Does no one in the Order know what birth control is?" Gideon spoke up, but he was grinning as well, and even chanced a devilish look at Marlene.

Marlene looked at Gideon, shocked. Was he _teasing_ her? Like old times? Unsure exactly how to respond, she just stuck her tongue out at him.

"Hello! Still on the landing!" Lily called. "Can we bring Harry down now?"

"Yes, sorry," Remus called, coming out of his stupor. "Smoke free and baby safe. We got distracted by Dorcas' news."

"It wasn't fucking _news_ ," Dorcas retorted. "You lot wouldn't leave it alone. We weren't _planning_ on telling you, you know."

"Why not?" Fabian asked, sitting upright now and giving Dorcas and Ed looks. "We deserve to know. Family, hello."

"What news?" Lily asked, coming down the stairs behind James with Harry in her arms. "We must've missed it, getting Harry out of his snowsuit and all."

"Ah well," Edgar started, wanting to have the opportunity to announce his impending fatherhood officially. "We're having a baby. Me and Dorcas I mean."

"Well you and who else?" Sirius laughed.

"Wow. That's. Just. Wow," Remus said softly. "That's a big thing!"

"Well of _course_ it's a big thing. It's a _baby_ ," Marlene said. "You must be terrified!"

"Yes, actually, I really, really am, so can we _please_ not talk about it?" Dorcas pleaded, reaching for Ed's hand and digging her fingernails in. "We found out today. As in ten fucking minutes ago. We've hardly even had time to fucking _think_. Can you all just back the fuck off?"

"Ooh, hormones!" Fabian said brightly, and then made a quick, wise decision to escape the couch and move back to his chair a few blessed feet away. "Sorry."

Edgar mistakenly chose to laugh at Fabian's comment, the result being Dorcas digging her fingernails in even deeper. "Ow!" he said defensively. "What did I do?"

Smirking knowingly as she sat down Lily said, "Just a little advice Ed; you might want to stay on your pregnant girlfriend's good side for the next nine months."

"I can second that," James said vehemently, sitting next to Lily and bouncing Harry in his lap. "Besides, it's so worth the extra effort."

"So about the sit-in," Dorcas said loudly, tearing her eyes away from Harry and looking up at Gideon. "You remember that, don't you? It's what we've all come here to organize?"

Gideon was grinning broadly now and got up out of his chair to move across the room. Sitting next to Marlene he jabbed her in the side with his elbow and said, "Funny thing, isn't it?" his eyes dancing. "Dorcas Meadowes not wanting to be the centre of the attention? My, my."

Marlene was so very happy at that moment she could have screamed. He was making an effort. He wasn't ignoring her anymore. She could just kiss him!

Wait. No. Bad idea. Focus, Marlene. No kissing, just smile and joke. "It's obviously the end of the world as we know it. At least we don't have to worry about global warming. I mean, you'd expect the temperatures to drop quite a lot, what with the whole hell freezing over thing. So that's one big item we can cross off of our Good Activist's List of Problems to Solve."

"You lot just don't knock off, do you?" Edgar asked, shaking his head. "Give us time to get used to the idea before you go off and throw us a ticker tape parade or summat, alright?"

"All right, all right," Fabian said, rolling his eyes. "No more talk of how Dorcas is pregnant and her and Edgar are going to have a baby, because apparently thinking about how they're going to be _parents_ of a screaming little creature that they'll love even when it keeps them awake for six months straight is stressing them out."

"Hey, don't make assumptions," Marlene interjected before turning to Dorcas and Edgar. "We're your friends. We'll support you in whatever you decide to do."

"Honestly, right now they probably just want to talk about something else," Remus reminded everyone. "So. The sit-in."

"Right, well, Fabian and I did a little pre-planning," Gideon said as his brother reached for some poster board that was resting behind the telly stand.

Holding it up proudly, Fabian chirped, "Look! Diagrams!"


	13. Dance, Dance (March 3rd, 10th & 23rd, 2007)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Where Hestia has three boyfriends (one's gay, one's indifferent, and the other likes horses), Fabian has some issues with costume jewelry, and Gideon scratches his ass (and brings lunch).

_Dance through history to put world poverty in the past! All eras welcome! All couples in costume welcome_!

Fabian blinked at the bold letters on his newspaper page, interested. Collecting pledges to stop poverty was something Fabian could do with his eyes closed. Dancing, he loved. But... couples? Fabian would love to join, but just the _thought_ of Caradoc trying to do the jitterbug properly? Ew. Major cringe. Plus, well, he had a feeling they were expecting a whole bunch of heteros. Maybe he could just volunteer to help with costumes or something.

Down the hallway and behind Gideon's closed door, Hestia slid out of bed and into a housecoat. She watched Gideon sleep for a little while and asked herself the same questions she always did when she spent night with either Gideon or Aidan. Was she a bad person? What was she doing, stringing them along like this? Looking in the mirror at Gideon's bureau, she pulled her bedhead into a haphazard ponytail still scrutinizing herself. The funny thing was that she didn't feel guilty when she was with Gideon. She just sort of felt detached. She knew Gideon well enough after all these months with him to know he was still very much _not_ over Marlene, and that if Marlene changed her mind tomorrow, Gideon would drop Hestia like a hot potato.

Aidan, however... Aidan she felt guilty for. Aidan really cared about her. In fact, she was pretty sure that for the last two weekends he'd been trying to work up the courage to tell her he loved her. That... _that_ killed Hestia. She wasn't sure how much longer she could keep emotionally supporting Gideon while hiding the way she really felt about him and them together.

Hestia wondered if it would even really make a difference if she ended things with Gideon right here and now. Gideon probably wouldn't even notice.

She contemplated her reflection for a few moments longer before leaving Gideon to his snoring and sliding out the door.

"Morning," she said with a soft smile as she walked into the rec room. She sat herself across from Fabian on Gideon's ratty plaid chair and asked, "Anything horrid in the paper? I'm in the mood to hear something gory."

Fabian looked up at Hestia blankly for a moment, the tale of a gruesome trainwreck from section A on the tip of his tongue. The words disappeared though, and he grinned brightly. Oh. Ohhh.

"Hestia," Fay chirped, folding the paper and holding it up against his chest for her to see. "Hestia Jones. You. You and me. Will you be my dance girlfriend?"

"Your... what?" Hestia asked, peering at the advertisement. "Ugh. You're going to make me wear sequins, aren't you?"

"Only if we do seventies. Disco, you know," he said, flipping his wrist dismissively and dropping the paper. He leaned forward and grabbed her hands, practically bouncing. "But _I_ think we should do forties. Like, pinstripes and flapper dresses and swing dancing and matching booty shorts!"

Hestia quirked an eyebrow. "The scary part is that I'm fairly certain you're referring to yourself when you say booty shorts."

"Of course not. Unless you'd rather flash your bare bottom at the crowd when I throw you around," Fabian quipped, then waggled his eyebrows. "But been there done that, eh? I know the witnesses."

"You're a mean, mean man, Fabian Prewett," Hestia replied and stuck out her tongue. "And what do you want me to dance with you for anyhow?"

"World poverty," Fabian said loftily. "You will, won't you? We can single handedly end starvation and illiteracy in all the third world countries! And also win a nice hefty cash prize. Our Bailing Out the Order Fund is running dangerously low. If anyone gets arrested, we might have to resort to selling Dorcas' nipples on Ebay or something."

"Her baby's going to need them when it gets here," Hestia reminded him. "It wouldn't be right to starve a newborn baby for the sake of bailing your arse out of jail. Especially Dorcas' baby. I hope Edgar gets a good hold on it when it comes out."

"She doesn't exactly come off as the motherly type, to be sure," Fabian agreed. Understatement of the year. "So will you? Will you dance with me, Hes? I'll even let you be the girl!"

"Aw, shucks, and here I was getting all excited about seeing you with pincurls," Hestia grinned.

"We can do that anyway," Fay chuckled. "But you're avoiding the question. Yes or no? Are you going to personally stand in the way of good entertainment _and_ world peace?"

Hestia rolled her eyes. "I can already see that you're going to annoy the hell out of me until I agree to, so fine. But I'm designing our costumes. No ruffles, you fairy."

"No sports jerseys, you _boy_ ," Fay shot back.

"I think this is the beginning of a beautiful partnership," Hestia laughed. "Now where is it, when is it, and what are we dancing to?"

"Relationship, actually. It's a couples competition," Fabian answered. "And London, the end of the month, and I don't know. Something big band and orchestral. Swing, you know. Benny Goodman or whatever. Happy, upbeat, all that."

"Okay, so, let me get this straight. You just saw this morning, and expect us to choreograph a routine, make costumes, collect sponsors, and be ready to perform in London at the end of the month? And _you don't even know what you want us to dance to?_ "

"Exactly." Fabian smirked. "Why, think you aren't good enough? Aren't up to the task? _Afraid_ , Hestia?"

"You're about as transparent as a greasy paper towel, Fabian," Hestia said. "And that's not the way to get me to agree to this."

Fabian sighed dramatically. "Just for the record. You drove me to this."

With that, Fay dove over the coffee table and landed on top of Hestia, knocking them both over backwards in Gideon's chair.

They hit the ground with a resounding _crack_. Sure, Fay had effectively pinned Hestia, but in the process, one of the arms of Gideon's favourite chair had, unfortunately, somehow become detached.

"Gideon is going to beat you round the head with a shovel," Hestia said. "And I bet this isn't a position you're used to, huh? Between a woman's legs?"

"What the fuck?" Gideon shouted from his room, and in a moment was standing staring down at the two of them in his boxers. He looked from his chair, to Hestia in his dishevelled housecoat (naked underneath, he figured) with Fabian straddling her. "What the fuck?" he repeated and scratched the back of his head. "I. What the _hell_ is happening, or happened, or was about to happen?"

"Oh, well. Hestia agreed to dance with me in a couples contest, and I tackled her in glee. The chair is all my fault, isn't that right, Hes?" Fabian said brightly. "Unless you're reconsidering your offer. In which case this is all your fault and also, Gid, she was coming on to me."

Gideon furrowed his eyebrows. "Who's dancing? And who the fuck is planning on fixing my chair?"

"Fine, Fabian!" Hestia exclaimed, wriggling, surprised that he could hold her down. "I'll dance, damn it, now let me up."

Fabian gingerly climbed off, inspecting what looked like a minor carpet burn on the palm of his hand. "I am _so_ not built for roughhousing. Oh, and goodie, Hestia! I'm glad you came around."

"Hello? My _chair_ is _broken_?" Gideon said, pointing at the heap as he scratched his arse through the cotton of his pants.

"Yes, yes, whatever," Fabian said. "I may look very good in a tool belt, but that doesn't mean I can, you know, _screw_. Make Dad fix it or something."

"I'm sure you can screw just fine, Fabian," Hestia interjected, getting to her feet and pulling her housecoat tight around her.

"I can attest to that, actually," Gideon said. "Thin walls."

Fay grinned. "Yes, well. Maybe when you get Dad to fix the chair, you can get him to fix your headboard too. Oh, did you think I didn't know?"

***

" _Ow_!" Fabian shrieked, stopping in his tracks and stomping his foot. "Enough! That is _it_! Sew that bloody necklace down or else you can't wear it. It's going to take out my eye. I like my eyes. I use them to stare at Caradoc's bum. This is a very important activity and it will _not_ be ruined by costume jewelry."

"You're the one who picked it out!" Hestia snapped back, putting her hands on her hips. "You can't keep your ruddy head up! You don't even like tits! My chest is not my face! If you didn't look at it the necklace wouldn't fucking hit you!"

"How self centered _are_ you?" Fay snapped. "You think even gay men want an eyeful. You are _not_ that hot, Hestia."

"Oh go _fuck_ yourself, you tittering fruitcake!" Hestia snarled. "You're probably just still pissy about wanting to wear my dress."

"I am not!" And that little quip reminded Fabian far too much of times of yore and nappies. "Honestly, you have man legs anyway."

Hestia gasped. "You take that back."

"I won't. It's true. Man legs! Manly, manly, hairy, muscular, scabby man legs!"

Hestia screwed up her face. "Well... you look like you just dipped your hair into a tub of a tubby man's armpit sweat!"

"You have B.O."

"Well you have bloody syphillis!"

"Yeah, from the time you borrowed my trousers!"

"Yes, well you stretched out my lingerie, you crossdressing twink!"

"Why is it crossdressing when I dress up for fun, but you wear men's clothes all the time and it's just 'your style'? News flash! That is about as far from stylish as you can get, you trampy tomboy!"

"Well, least I'm not as fucking obsessed as you! I don't have to make sure I don't clash with the fucking carrots when I go to the market!"

"Oh, now you're just being ridiculous. Stupid as well as trashy, I see."

"And _I_ see that you're not denying that you accentuate your outfits with produce!"

"And I see that _you're_... still stupid and trashy!"

It was just as Hestia was about to reply 'I'd rather be trashy than accessorize with radishes!' that Gideon cleared his throat from the corner of the room. 

"Um. Guys?" Caradoc was standing next to Gideon with his eyebrows raised and a slightly frightened expression on his face. "We... brought sandwiches, but we'll come back later," Gideon continued. "Since you've obviously already smoked a lot of crack."

"She called Caradoc a slut. I had to retaliate," Fay sniffed.

Hestia pouted. "He said I had man legs."

Gideon and Caradoc exchanged a look, trying to hide their amusement. Looking back at his brother and girlfriend, Gideon said, "You two are just... you're like two cheerleaders throwing a hissy fit over whose pom poms are fluffier."

"Except less mature," Caradoc agreed, and then held out a large paper bag. "Come on. Lunch time."

Eyeing Hestia mistrustfully, Fabian ran a hand through his hair (which was beautiful, no matter _what_ she said), and weighed his options. Continue the fight and miss out on food, or strike a truce and eat some lunch.

He was famished--dancing was hard work, after all--and forced a tight smile. "I'll lend you Molly's embroidery needles to stitch that necklace down. And can I have your pickle?"

Hestia scratched her nose. "I guess that's fine with me."

"Good!" Gideon said, clapping his hands together. "Less diva dramatics, more sandwich. Es. Sandwiches. Lunch."

***

" _Our on-the-scene reporter has just met up with third place winners Fabian Prewett and girlfriend Hestia Jones, whose 40s era, big band, swing competition was a favourite with the crowds here today in London. The couple takes home 8,000 pounds for their efforts. Felix Harrison has the story, Felix?_ "

"Evening Shauna and the channel four team! I'm here with Fabian and Hestia, third place winners in today's Dance to End Poverty thingamabob. How does it feel, guys?"

"Oh, just fabulous," Fabian said brightly. "It's a real shocker for us. We threw it all together in just a few weeks of intensive planning. We didn't expect to win. It was just fun to shimmy to such a good cause. And I know, that's so cliche, but honestly. Who knew we'd have such great dance chemistry?"

Recalling the millions of times they'd thrown the words 'fairy' and 'trash' at one another over the course of their practising, Hestia was fighting to keep a straight face as Fabian spoke. "Oh yes," she managed. "Quite a pair, I'd say."

Felix Harrison smiled, blissfully unaware of the truth about Fabian and Hestia's 'couple' status. The nonexistant part of it, that is. "So how long have the two of you been together, then?"

"Oh, just ages," Fabian said quickly. "It was love at first sight, of course, and I just _can't_ get enough of her. Isn't she just delish?"

Hestia couldn't help it. She snorted. To cover herself she said, "Oh, Fay, you're so silly."

"How sweet! Well, congratulations you two lovebirds," Felix said, looking a little unnerved. It was obvious he could tell something was off, but Fay was just grinning and tossing his hair around and Hestia was attempting to cover giggles by scratching her chin with one gloved hand.

"Right!" Felix continued after a beat. "Well, that's it from me here, Shauna. Thanks to all the people who helped make this event such a success. I believe the total raised was over 22,000 pounds today, so suffice to say, it was a smash hit! Back to you in the studio!"


	14. Should I Stay or Should I Go (March 11th & 14th, 2007)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Where Gideon takes Emmeline's advice, Marlene makes commentary on her life without realizing it, and they find one another again. Sort of.

It had been a long day. There'd been an early morning recording session for the band that Marlene had tagged along to (Stubby said she was his muse, and he wanted her around as often as possible), and then she'd gone to work at the pool. First aid lessons for youth were always tiring. They freaked out so much about the mouth-to-mouth resuscitation thing.

On top of a long day, she'd gone grocery shopping on her way home, and then missed her bus and just decided to hoof it the ten or so blocks home with three bags of groceries.

Anyway, she was glad to be back at her flat. _Her_ flat. She'd been spending too much time at Stubby's. She liked sex as much as any other girl, but sometimes she felt like a walking vagina.

"Hello, my little man," she said brightly to her perpetually dying plant. She loved him because he somehow always managed to just hang in there. He was the only living thing she'd had to take care of on her own that hadn't died. "Oh goodness! I have a message! I bet you it was Stubby. That's why you didn't answer it, isn't that right Timothy Wellington?"

Her plant didn't like Stubby because Stubby always put his cigarettes out in Timothy's soil.

 _Beep_.

"Hey Kin, it's Gid," Gideon's voice said. "I'm just wondering what you're up to this weekend, because there's a new chick flick playing that I'm pretty sure you'll have an orgasm over. Give me a call back."

Marlene blinked at her answering machine. A message like this could've just as easily been from five years ago, back when everything was just normal. Or, well. Mostly normal, anyway.

"Timothy Wellington, did you somehow cause a rift in time by defying the laws of science to live so long?"

The plant didn't answer, of course, and so Marlene just stared at her answering machine for a moment before diving for the phone. She could put away her groceries later. This was monumental.

She should probably take Gideon off her speed dial (she had his number memorized anyway), but as it was, she just had to hold down the number two. Before he could even really say hello, though, Marlene began talking.

"What year is it? Also, true or false: I, Gideon Prewett, am currently either very drunk or existing in an alternate universe."

On the other line, Gideon frowned. After a beat he answered, "2007, last time I checked, and false. I'm very sober and unless _this_ is an alternate universe, I'm pretty sure I'm in the right dimension. Are _you_ drunk?"

"No," Marlene said, smiling to herself and sinking onto one of her barstools. "I just can't believe you invited me to a movie. A chick flick, no less. What brought this on? Not that I'm discouraging it. It's great. You can't back out anymore now. I've cleared my schedule and we are going. Timothy says hello, by the way. He liked your message."

Gideon laughed. "Is that old bugger still alive? Pretty impressive." He paused, thinking of the best thing to say, smiling widely, knowing he had the upper hand here. Marlene probably still didn't know what was okay and what wasn't, but by inviting her out, Gideon had set the standard. "Why can't you believe I invited you to a movie, you nonce? You love fucking chick flicks. You _live_ for them. It's not like I'm doing myself a favour here you know."

"Right. So. Okay, thanks then," she said slowly. Mostly, she didn't want to question it. She wanted to take what she could get and ask no questions. She was going through Gideon withdrawal, and here he was offering her exactly what she wanted after all she'd done, and who was she to ask _why_? But, well. The rest of her couldn't stand it. "You know me. I could try to be polite or whatever, but seriously, what's going on, Gid? I'm officially confused. I thought you didn't want to be friends?"

Although she couldn't see him, Gideon shrugged. "Well. I mean. What do you want me to say here? We were friends regardless of the other shit. We just sort of tucked it away for a little while and let the other shit dominate. Fuck it. I miss you, you miss me, so enough of it."

"Oh, Gid," Marlene said, rolling her eyes. "You're such an unbelievable idiot." And she loved every single idiotic bit of him, the wonderful prat. "Okay. So. I say sushi at 7:30 and then the nine o'clock show, just like old times. And I'm issuing a wasabi challenge."

"And I'll kick your arse, as usual," Gideon answered. "I have to head to work, but I'll see you Saturday, Kinny."

"Deal," she said. "Saturday."

Hanging up, Marlene grinned at Timothy and wondered idly what to tell Stubby.

She'd come up with something. This was too important to jeopardize.

***

Gideon knocked lightly on the door to Marlene's flat and stepped back, bouncing on his heels. He was nervous about this, not sure how he and Marlene would get along after so much time apart, especially in such an awkward way. It's not as though they could pretend that the incident at the hospital didn't happen. Gideon was just taking Emmeline's advice. He didn't want Marlene to ever think he'd given up on them... on her. He just wanted her to remember what drew them together in the first place.

He'd dressed carefully, and wore older clothes that had Gideon/Marlene history etched all over them. A blue button up shirt she'd bought him for a birthday and always ended up wearing the morning after. A pair of jeans that still had the remnents of an incredible grass stain from wrestling in Molly's front yard. And, to break the ice, a bouquet of her favourite flowers: sunflowers.

"Hey Gid, I just..." Marlene started brightly as she threw the door open, shamelessly displaying her post-shower bathrobe. She trailed off, though, when she saw the flowers. Sunflowers. He brought her sunflowers! Stubby never got her flowers, and if he ever did, they wouldn't be sunflowers because he'd never asked her favourite flower. Not that Gideon had ever asked. He was the _reason_ they were her favourite. They'd gone to a sunflower maze one year, and made out until some kids with their parents had stumbled upon them, and then he'd taken her for a picnic. It had been their three month anniversary of coming out as a couple.

Marlene blinked out of her memories and grinned at Gideon.

"What, did you think I'd forget that I liked you and just slam the door in your face? You didn't have to bring flowers. Come on in and put them in water. I'm running a little late."

Late was an understatement. She wasn't dressed yet, and had only just finished hair and makeup. Not that she wore much. At least she'd picked out her outfit, though. That's what had taken her so long. She'd been totally girly about deciding what to wear.

"Well you can always go in your bathrobe," Gideon suggested, heading to the kitchen as though he'd only been there yesterday. "Or better yet, nothing at all. We'd probably get in for free then."

Marlene curled her lip at him. "Shut up. I'm just going to go get dressed. Keep Timothy company, will you? He's missed you."

At that, took three steps to the left and shut her bedroom curtain behind her, dropping the bathrobe and reaching for a pair of jeans. "So. How's the liquidation centre doing? Better than the grocery store, at least?"

"It's okay," Gideon answered, sticking the sunflowers in a filled up vase from under the sink. He sat himself on one of the barstools and watched Marlene's silhouette, trying not to think about how easy it would be to just walk behind the curtain. "How's the pool?"

"Oh, fine. I'm thinking about training to be a scuba instructor," she commented idly. "I love swimming, and I could go to all sorts of tropical places, you know?"

Not that she'd suggested it to Stubby. He didn't even like her job as a lifeguard. Apparently he thought that being a rockstar's girlfriend was a profession all its own.

She did up her bra and then reached for a shirt she hadn't worn in a while. It was a funky, long, red sort of deal with about a hundred patches sewn onto it from concerts her and Gideon had gone to and movies they liked. They'd even written various quotes and things along the seams in permanent marker. (In one spot, it read, 'This big stupid oaf throbs hugely for your feminine depths!' It was small, and at the back, and hardly legible, but it was there.)

Throwing the curtain open, Marlene realized she'd not done up her jeans yet, and did that as she walked up to Gid. "I might even go for my cave diving license. I could be search and rescue."

"Too bad we never moved to America," Gideon said. "L.A. would've been a good place to do something like that. Nice shirt," he added, smiling. "Turn around."

Marlene rolled her eyes and then did as asked, facing her 'living room' (a couple beat up chairs from garage sales and a thirteen inch television). "It's not like I can wear this around Stubby, so I figured I'd let it out tonight. Don't want it to get too musty, you know. It might start to smell permanently being kept in _my_ closet too long."

"Pig," Gideon said fondly, running his thumb over the spot he'd been looking for. They used to be so retarded. Well, they still were, but Gideon didn't leave answering machine messages like, 'Hey Kinny, just calling to say I Love You,' anymore. "I can't believe the marker hasn't washed out yet. I mean, it's faded, but it's still going strong."

And Marlene tactfully refrained from telling him that she'd always washed the shirt by hand for that express reason. Clearing her throat, she stepped away from the soft touch of his hand against the small of her back.

"So. We should probably get going," Marlene said, stepping barefoot into a pair of beat up sneakers and grabbing her jacket and wallet. "You ready?"

Gideon raised an eyebrow. "I was ready before I got here. What sort of half-arse date are you?"

"This is not a date," she said, but the smile on her face seemed to be saying otherwise. "And you and I both know you would've been shocked if you'd gotten here and I was all dressed up and ready to go."

"Fair enough," Gideon agreed, holding the door open for her. "And I hate to make you exercise more than necessary, but my van has a flat."

"That's it, I'm staying home," Marlene said, even as she walked out the door, pulling out her key to lock it after them. "You know the only reason I hang out with you is because you can drive me around."

"Mooch," Gideon said. "Just for that I'm not letting you get any."

"Hey, your loss. Don't you remember theatre blowjobs?"

"Fondly," Gideon said. "Or, at least, the one time we tried, and the conversations that took place before and after."

Marlene was embarrassed to find herself blushing a little. "Not that you helped. You weren't supposed to laugh at me."

"Well it was laugh or force you back down there," Gideon said. "You did stop halfway. It was really, really cruel, you know. Cruella De Vil."

"Noted. Next time I'll skin it and make one single sock," Marlene threatened with a smirk.

"Next time?"

***

What would be considered _too_ far? They'd flirted their way through dinner and now, halfway through the movie they'd only been making commentary, laughing, and shooting sidelong glances at one another. If Gideon put his arm around her, would she let him? Would she consider it friendly, or... something else?

 _Fuck it_ , Gideon thought, and slid his arm comfortably (albeit tentatively) around Marlene's shoulders, pulling her into him slightly.

Marlene froze for a moment. Was it cheating on Stubby if she let Gideon hold her like this? It wasn't like they were making out. It was just... nice. It was comfortable. It was relaxing. It was sort of pushing the boundaries, but not enough that Marlene wanted to make a scene about it.

Instead, she just rested her head on his shoulder and began idly fiddling with the seam of Gideon's jeans.

"You know, Brian's an idiot. Obviously Rebecca is far better for him than Miss Kiss of Death Alice," Marlene mumbled.

Emmeline had suggested this movie to him, and now Gideon could see why. And Marlene's commentary made him want to laugh. He (strangely enough) was easily represented by Rebecca's character, and Marlene was definitely, definitely Brian. Emmeline... that girl really looked out for him.

Instead of adding a comment, Gideon began playing with Marlene's hair.

"Honestly," Marlene continued. "They have much better chemistry than him and _Alice_. She's been using Brian since the first time she met him, but Rebecca was just... his friend."

Gideon smiled. He wondered sometimes if Marlene realized what she was saying or if she just talked out of her arse. _If I slide my hand down will she slap me_? Gideon wondered, and decided that he'd hold off just a litte bit longer. To be sure.

"That feels nice," she murmured absently, leaning her head a little into his touch. He had such gentle hands. As Brian and Rebecca began kissing on screen, Marlene grinned and added, "Finally. See? I told you. Better chemistry."

Brian and Rebecca danced in the New Year on screen, and then Brian (stupidly) said Alice's name when he was about to kiss Rebecca again. "Oh," Gideon said. "Well. So much for chemistry."

"Idiot," Marlene said. "He's such an idiot. Why is he even still _thinking_ of her?"

"I dunno," Gideon said. "I guess sometimes people just get fixated on the idea of something, rather than... you know. What actually works." He felt as though he was explaining Marlene's own actions to her, and wondered why Marlene couldn't see that she was doing the exact same thing with him and Stubby. "People do stuff that doesn't make sense."

"I guess," Marlene said. She would've said more, but some woman in front of her turned around and shushed her. Slouching down her her seat a little, Marlene stopped fidgeting with Gideon's trousers and just let her hand rest on his thigh. It felt nice. It was just nice to be with someone she was so comfortable with, despite all the crap that had happened between them. It was like all it had taken was both of them being willing to take that step for them to fall immediately back into being so close.

Okay. Okay. Her hand was on his thigh. That meant something, didn't it? Friends are comfortable with one another but Gideon figured that didn't necessarily include hands on thighs. Thighs are close to private areas. Should he take the chance now? He figured there was about a 70% - 30% chance that she'd be okay with it.

He grabbed her boob.

Marlene snorted. "Are you kidding?" Laughingly, she pushed his hand away and grinned up at him. "There are less painful ways to make me shut up."

"What Stubby doesn't know won't hurt him," Gideon said quietly.

Marlene thought about it for a moment. It was Gideon. He knew she was with Stubby. He knew she wouldn't leave him. He knew all that. Maybe he didn't care.

...Maybe she ought to be asking herself if _she_ cared, not if Gideon did. That was her answer right there, she thought.

Staring straight ahead at the screen, Marlene reached up, grabbed Gideon's hand, and moved it back down, heart pounding.

Gideon licked his lips. That meant... what _did_ that mean? Gideon was getting tired of asking himself questions. If Marlene was letting him grope her without making some sort of cheeky comment about it, then she must not care. He knew her well enough by now to accept that the words 'boyfriend' and 'I love you' were off limits, but he would take as much of her as he could.

Twisting slightly in his seat, Gideon reached for the side of Marlene's face with his other hand, turned it to face him, and then kissed her.

Well. That answered Marlene's questions.

As Marlene melted into him, feeling her breath catch in her throat as she opened her lips to him, she slid her hand a little higher on his thigh. She'd _missed_ this.

Gideon was responding quickly to Marlene's touch and knew that the rest of the movie wasn't worth interrupting this. He wished he'd fixed the fucking tire on his van. "Do you want to leave?" Gideon asked breathlessly as he pulled away, nose to nose, still cupping her face.

"I know chick flicks," Marlene answered, just as breathlessly, her eyes shut and her face still tilted up to his. "Brian probably botches the quiz thing, gets burned by Alice, and ends up happily ever after with Rebecca, who's far too good for him anyway. I don't need to stay and watch."

"My place is closer," Gideon said, pulling them both to their feet and grabbing his coat.

"Jesus, get a room," the woman who'd shushed Marlene said.

"We're in the process, ma'am," Gideon told her, grinning, and winked when she looked at him scandalously, before grabbing Marlene by the hand and pulling her toward the nearest exit.

Marlene giggled and barely had time to grab her jacket as she stumbled after Gideon, muttering apologies to all the people they rushed passed.

"Gideon, that's an emergency exit!" Marlene laughed, but Gideon pushed right on through the door, setting off the alarm. "You're an idiot. Run!"

It was as though they were 17 again. Holding hands they ran through the streets, laughing, pausing at the occasional light post or mailbox to make out for a minute or two. By the time they reached Molly's driveway Gideon was so impatient that he was tugging at Marlene's jacket,trying to pull it off while he reached for his keys.

Marlene disengaged from Gideon to let him get the door open, then pulled her own shirt off and walked past him in her bra into the basement.

"What are you waiting for, then?" she asked as she walked down the stairs and towards Gideon's room. Fabian, however, was sitting in the rec room watching the telly. "Um. Hey, Fay."

Gideon locked the door again behind him and practically skipped, undoing his trousers as he came into the rec room. Not noticing Fabian, he asked Marlene, "What are _you_ waiting for?"

"Me to leave, likely," Fabian said from the couch, getting up and staring at the two of them with a stunned look of confusion. Weren't they _both_ seeing other people? "Uh. I was just on my way out. Nice bra. New fashion statement?"

"Uh. Yeah. We're just... going to have a game of Scrabble. He... I... lost a bet. So. No shirt for Marlene!"

Gideon gave Fabian an 'I'll explain later' look, and said, "We'll just go play that game now. Scrabble, you know. In my room. Bye."

Fay rolled his eyes. Yeah, Gideon sure _would_ explain later. "I'll just be upstairs with the kids. Good luck with your _Scrabble_. Make good words."

Marlene nodded enthusiastically, and burst out laughing as Fabian made his way out of the basement suite. As soon as he was out of sight, Marlene grabbed Gideon by the shirt and pulled him into a kiss, stepping backwards in the general direction of Gid's room.

Gideon pressed Marlene up against the closed door, sliding his hands up her back and undoing her bra as he sucked on her neck.

"No fair. You have on too many clothes," she complained, tugging Gideon's undone trousers down before reaching behind her to open the door and half falling into Gid's room. After regaining her balance, she undid her own jeans and began shimmying out. "God, I haven't been in here in ages."

Gideon stepped out of his trousers and pushed Marlene onto the bed, tossing her bra onto the floor before unbuttoning his shirt.

Crawling backwards on the bed, Marlene laid back and got comfortable. She stuck out her tongue and wiggled her finger in a 'come hither' motion.

Gideon laughed. He'd missed this so much. His shirt dropped to the floor and he pushed off his socks before crawling onto the bed above Marlene in just his boxers and saying, "You beckoned?"

"My feminine depths are waiting," Marlene snickered, reminded by her shirt, which she'd left somewhere by their door. "Are you throbbing hugely yet?"

Gideon grinned. "Not quite. I could use a little help," he said, and started kissing her chest, his fingers looped in the corners of her knickers.

Marlene grinned right back and slid a hand under the waistband of his shorts, fingers edging teasingly close but never quite _there_. "Is this helping?"

Gideon groaned as he licked a nipple before sucking gently. Letting go he said, "You cock tease," and then moved to suck her other breast.

Running another and slowly down his side, rib by rib, she leaned up into him a little, lifting the hand on his side to his face, tilting it up and sucking his bottom lip into her mouth.

"You're thinner," she commented, pulling out of the kiss rather suddenly. "Than you were last time, I mean. How come?"

Gideon nuzzled the side of her face and nibbled gently on her ear lobe. "I lost a lot of weight," he whispered. "Missing you."

"Oh," she said, and then decided things were getting too heavy. As a means of distraction, she abruptly squeezed his cock. "Sorry."

"Keep doing that," Gideon said gruffly, "and all the blood will drain from my brain and I'll forget that I even have a body."

"Okay," Marlene breathed. She loved the way he sounded at times like this. The way his voice went all low and gravelly. The way he forgot about everything in the world except her and him and what they were about to do. She'd missed that. She'd missed _him_.

Curling her legs around his thighs, Marlene used the hand _not_ currently busy to try and tug his boxers down a little.

Gideon moved up off of her enough to allow her to pull his pants down around his hips, his erection pressing into her thigh, her hand still wrapped around it. Sitting up on his knees he tugged at her panties, pulling them past her thighs.

"You're so bloody gorgeous," Marlene whispered, then grinned. "How much of a slut would I be if I told you I haven't been this wet in ages?"

"I dunno," Gideon answered, pressing her legs back toward her to pull her panties off one foot at a time. "How much of a slut would _I_ be if I told you I haven't been this hard in ages?"

"It seems to be the theme of the evening, but... what are we waiting for?" Marlene asked, smiling. "Get naked!"

Laughing Gid pulled his boxers off the rest of the way and then reached to the nightable drawer for a condom.

"We don't need that, if you don't want," Marlene said, knowing what he was reaching for. "Stubby made me go on the pill."

Gideon licked his lips, ignoring the mention of Stubby. "Okay," he said, and abandoned the drawer, lining himself up and kissing her as he pushed himself inside.

Marlene couldn't help but groan. Gideon was quite a bit bigger than Stubby, after all, and it had been _years_ since she'd been with Gideon. She wrapped her legs around him again, this time at his waist, and pulled him close into her, breathing hard.

Gideon muttered, "Fuck, Kinny," and started moving slowly, trying to familiarize himself with her again. She was taller than Hestia and he'd gotten used to compensating. Once he finally got a slow, hard rhythm going he started sucking at the nape of Marlene's neck.

Marlene dug her fingernails into his back and arched into him, gasping, "Holy fuck."

Gideon's breathing got progressively heavy, and he wrapped one arm behind Marlene's shoulders so he could pull her more tightly into him as he started picking up a little more speed. "Jesus, you're so wet," he moaned.

"I told you I was," she said shakily. She thought she might actually come before him. She hadn't come in a while. Stubby was just... a little quicker, and if Marlene was honest, Stubby just didn't know what to do to her, not like Gideon did.

Gideon kissed her lips eagerly, his hips urging hers to meet his thrusts so he could slide deeper.

"Oh God," Marlene gasped, throwing her head back and squeezing her eyes shut. "Gideon..." Trailing off, Marlene just focussed on breathing and moving and feeling. She really had missed this.

Gideon felt the sticky drops of persperation on his forehead and licked his dry lips. Grunting, he picked up the pace, knowing that the combination of the idea of being _with_ Marlene again, and the effort he was putting in was soon going to push him over the edge.

It was too soon, Marlene thought, for those tell tale tightenings, but she was sure it wouldn't be much longer now. Or... perhaps _now_ was the key word here.

Digging her fingernails in even deeper (thank goodness they were short), Marlene cried out, seeing stars as she came.

Marlene's muscles clenching around his cock did Gideon in. He came pressing hard into her, spilling inside of her (something he'd never done before, as they'd always used condoms), and after a stiff convulsing moment he collapsed on top of her, burrying his head in her hair.

Though it was quite a spectacular orgasm, she was a little sad that they were finished. It had been so long since she'd felt that _connected_ to anyone. She released her hold on his back--Had she drawn _blood_? Oops!--to push her hair from her eyes and press a kiss to the side of Gideon's head.

"Get off me now, you giant lummox," she said fondly, smiling. "I can hardly breathe."

Gideon laughed and pulled out, rolling onto his back. "Wow," he said. "Just... it's been a long time, Kin."

"Yeah, it has," she agreed softly, reaching a hand over to run it through his hair as she cuddled up to his side. She could stay for a little longer. "That was amazing."

"Will you stay?" Gideon asked, wrapping an arm around her. "For the night I mean? I'd really like you to."

"Gid, I... shouldn't," she said, not moving. She was so comfortable and sated and content. "Just ask me again."

"Will you stay the night?" Gideon asked again. He wanted so badly to tell her he loved her but knew that she'd run again if he did. Those seemed to be the magic words with Marlene. They either made her stay or go.

"Yeah, okay," she agreed. "So long as I can wear the blue shirt home when I do leave."

"Yes, of course," Gideon replied. "It's tradition. I've had that shirt since high school." They were quiet for a little while, before Gideon couldn't wait any longer and needed to ask whether or not this was just a one time thing he had to tuck away for another three years, or something more. Even if Marlene wouldn't be his and his alone... any bit of Marlene he could get he would take. 

"Kin," he started slowly. "Are... is this... will we... you know?"

"No," she replied firmly. "I mean. It's nothing. It's just comfort. It was... a moment of weakness. Next time, just a movie or whatever, okay? No sex."

Gideon could hear the hesitation in her voice and figured that 'next time', nine chances out of 10, Marlene would be the one to get things started. "Well. If that's what you want," he said. "In the meantime, since tonight is just a moment of weakness..."

Marlene hid a smile against the skin of Gideon's shoulder. "Well," she said, the amusement in her voice coming through even though it was muffled. "Maybe just... one more moment."


	15. Come As You Are (March 15th & 16th, 2007)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Where Sirius is a prat, Remus is a prat, and generally, there is much prattish-ness afoot.

Only... a few... more... hours.

Maybe he'd have two or three more cups of coffee to help him stay focussed, but really, he was almost there. He could do it, he knew he could. He just needed to keep working at it.

"Sirius, could you bring me another cup of coffee? Please?" Remus called.

Reminding Sirius of Remus' existence was possibly a bad idea as his boyfriend was currently not very happy with Remus for not allowing himself to be distracted from his computer work. It seemed Sirius thought that if Remus called in sick to work when he wasn't actually sick, it should be to stay in bed with Sirius all day. But this was important. And he'd be done soon, if all went well, and then they could really celebrate.

"I promise I'll make it up to you, Sirius!"

***

Gideon passed a few copies of the tabloids around the table and said, "Someone's working in our favour here. Three days more they figure, at _least_ that the servers are going to be down. They have to do their inventory all over again, their stocks are taking massive hits... it's ridiculous. One little computer virus." He sat back down and shook his head. "We need to take advantage of this _somehow_."

"Let's fuck 'em up!" Dorcas suggested brightly.

"Well, they'll probably be doing a lot of deliveries in the meantime, right? The new line is due to hit shelves soon, and with all the people working overtime to fix this, they'll probably not make such a stupidly big deal about delivery this time around," James said and grinned rakishly, bouncing Harry on his knee. "We could try and track bust out the tire spikes. I mean, I wouldn't reccommend it if he's got armed guards again, but odds are staff'll be otherwise engaged, right?"

"That's a good start. You can pull the run, can't you limber legs?" Gideon asked James, just as Remus and Sirius came through the door.

"Sorry we're late," Sirius said. "We were out, came over soon as we got the message."

"It's all right. We've just started planning. Did you see the tabloids? Someone leaked that Vol de Mort's entire computer system crashed late last night," Fabian said. "We thought we'd try to kick them while they're down."

"That's what this is about?" Remus asked, smiling. "The full system crash?"

Sirius blinked, pulling his scarf off of his neck and sitting down next to Emmeline. "What the hell, you jerk? Is that what you were doing yesterday?"

"Remus doing what now?" Lily asked.

"Oh, well. You know," Remus said, blushing now. "I had an idea, and once I sat down and started, I just kept going. Turns out, it worked. Just a well placed corruption virus. All the information is still there, he just can't get at it."

"Are you fucking shitting me? You actually did this?" Dorcas asked. "Gideon's been fucking drooling at the thought for the last ten minutes. Careful, Remus, he might jump you and have a go."

Fabian snorted. "Something tells me he'll be able to refrain. Just a hunch."

"Okay, okay, what? I can't just drop..." Marlene started, breezing in and then freezing. Other people. An Order meeting. She sort of thought it was a booty call, and hadn't bothered to change out of Gideon's shirt or shower or anything. "I can't just drop my life for Order stuff, however important it undoubtedly is," Marlene continued, covering up her near slip. "Uh. What's up?"

Gideon swallowed. She hadn't left to go home more than 45 minutes ago, and despite that, seeing her again stopped Gideon in his tracks. It was like a secret that was going to swallow him whole when he just wanted to tell everyone in the room that he and Marlene had had sex several times the night before.

"Tabloids. Remus shut down Vol de Mort's servers. Big ruckus," Gideon said offhandedly, trying to seem nonchalant, and handed Marlene a copy of the paper as she sat down next to him.

"Nice shirt, Marlene," Fabian said loudly. "It looks familiar. Does Gideon have one like it?"

"Piss off, kid," Marlene said, trying to look engrossed in the tabloid. "So, seriously, Remus took him out? Congrats. You're a rockstar. What're we doing about it?"

"You two fucked, didn't you?" Dorcas asked bluntly. "We're a right lot of nymphos, we are."

Gideon turned 50 different shades of red and cleared his throat. "Anyway..."

Before Gideon could change the subject, Sirius said, "Oh no, you're not getting off that easy. What happened? Do share the juicy details, all that."

"I love how we're all just like... 'You had sex with one another? Great! Now tell us about it!' Never mind anything else. It's all about sex, isn't it?" Edgar said.

"Says the one whose girlfriend is knocked up. Shut up, Bones, or help us force Gideon and Marlene to talk," Sirius instructed.

"Certainly it was a lot of work. It took me more than eight hours," Remus commented airly, rolling his eyes. "But yes, sex is ever so much more interesting."

"Shut up, Remus. You know you're gagging for the details too," Dorcas said.

James was shocked, sure, considering what he and Lily had found out about Gideon and Marlene's relationship from the clip of them dancing and talking on the wedding DVD Leonard had made. Now, though, he put it out of his mind and leaned forward, jiggling Harry about and getting a happy baby laugh out of him. "I bet you've not dumped your respective others, have you? You can tell us. The Order is family. We're honour bound to keep all this shit to ourselves."

"Can we just..." Marlene started.

"They stormed in here half naked last night and hardly even waited for me to leave before ripping the rest of their clothes off," Fabian commented. "That's all I know. Well, and that they did it at least twice more after I came back downstairs. Noisy buggers."

Emmeline snickered at that, and raised her eyebrows at Gideon. "Interesting."

Gideon, despite being completely embarrased, was smiling wryly. "We're here for an Order meeting, not to discuss anyone's sex life," he said. "And anything Fabian _thinks_ he heard or saw is purely circumstantial. He can't prove anything."

"For my first piece of evidence, I ask you all to please direct your attention to the red shirt on the third stair down from the door," Fabian said, smirking at his brother. "For my second piece of evidence, I'll ask you to check out the hicky on Gideon's collar bone. Note, one Hestia Jones is out of town this weekend, and that is one fresh bruise."

"Honestly, I hate to be a stick in the mud, but I don't really seem to find this as amusing as you all seem to," Remus admitted. "It _is_ cheating, no offence or anything, and I don't really care to laugh about it. All in all, I actually find it a bit appalling to play with people like that."

Marlene flushed to the roots of her hair and slouched in her seat. "You..."

"Know shit fucking all, is what she ought to finish that sentence with," Dorcas piped up, interrupting Marlene. "You can get off your moral high horse. Hestia's fucking around on Gideon with Aidan Lynch, and I'll sell my kidneys if Stubby pays Marlene enough attention for her to even feel like she's _in_ a fucking relationship."

Edgar rubbed his face with his hands. "Dorcas..."

"You lot knew then?" Gideon asked, although he didn't seem too put off by the news. "Why didn't you tell me?"

Sirius clucked his tongue. "Um. She asked me not to? And I asked Ed not to. And I guess Ed asked Dor not to as well but she's too fucking stupid to know when to keep her bloody mouth shut."

"Pardon _me_?" Remus asked, staring at Sirius with wide, cold eyes.

James and Lily exchanged confused, worried, and anxious looks with one another as Sirius threw his arms up in surrender.

"Let's just say that I felt as though I owed Hestia one, how about that?" Sirius said pointedly, hoping that Remus would catch the point.

"Oh, yes, a mistake from years ago that you didn't even _know_ about means you can condone and assist her in cheating," Remus said, voice clipped. "Right, I suppose that's all right then. As long as _you're_ okay with not having any morals, that's all that matters."

Dorcas poked Ed in the side and gave him a look. Remus seemed _mad_. She'd never seen him _not_ be the picture of politeness and politically correctness. It was... weird. He obviously wasn't the pushover she'd thought him to be.

"Remus," Lily said. "Don't you think you're being a little..."

Sirius held up his hand. "No. He thinks that everything should fit into a wonderful little box where relationships are concerned, and it all goes back to what he's afraid _I'm_ going to do to him. Fuck you, Remus. She's _my_ friend, she needed _my_ help, and I gave it to her. That doesn't mean I agreed with it, and I've spent a great deal of energy trying to get her to tell him."

"'Fuck you, Remus,'" Remus repeated, drawing out the words. "Well, I suppose I ought to commend you on being a wonderful friend and just be glad it's still _me_ you want to fuck."

James' jaw dropped. "Hey, hey mates. Come on now."

"Dorcas is right. Get off your moral fucking high horse, Remus. Not every bloody relationship is between the princess and bloody prince charming. I've done worse things in my life, and I'd do worse yet if I felt it was necessary. If James asked me to help him bury a body I would, not because I agree with it, but because loyalty means more to me than someone else's ambiguous morals. I'm _loyal_ to you, you fucking nonce. Get it through your head, please!"

Remus glared. He hated that he wasn't as well-spoken as Sirius was, wasn't as eloquent. He hated that he couldn't articulate why he was so upset to Sirius. He hated that Sirius could make him feel like he was ridiculous for valuing dedication and monogamy over loyalty to a friend when they were doing something wrong.

Looking away from Sirius and to all the faces staring at them in shock, Remus forced a smile and got to his feet. "Best of luck taking advantage of the system failure. I regret I won't be able to help you plan. Excuse me."

And with that, he left the room, taking the stairs two at a time.

"Holy fuck," Dorcas swore softly, shaking her head. "Sirius, you can be a fucking prick, you know? And you should fucking know I didn't mean it like _that_ when I told him to get off his high horse."

Sirius growled and didn't say anything to anyone, just stood and followed Remus' path out of the basement, and out of the house.

Gideon let out a low whistle. "Remus was far more affronted on my behalf than I am for myself."

"It's... not exactly about you, Gid," James said, and then smiled a little. "Obviously."

Marlene rubbed her eyes with her hands. "This is such a mess. Can we just get back to business now? We've done enough damage with the personal info for one day."

***

Sirius glanced sidelong down the street and spotted Remus storming quickly in the vague direction of their complex. Sirius tore after him, shouting, "Remus! _Remus_!"

Remus whirled around at the sound of Sirius' voice, cheeks bright red. "What right do you have to negate _my_ opinion just because it's different from yours? I'm allowed to be upset that you apparently have no scruples about infidelity!"

Sirius caught up and stopped, out of breath, and managed, "What right? I could ask you the same bloody question! I was explaining myself, but you didn't want to hear it. You just want to be pissed at me and make me feel like shit, not because of what I've done, but simply because you're angry with me."

"It _is_ because of what you've done. I hate it when you play psychiatrist with me, like you know what's in my head better than I do," Remus retorted, breathing hard. "And you just had to say it, didn't you, in front of everyone!" Lowering his voice (Remus had practically been shouting), he continued, "You _know_ how I feel. You just, you don't even _think_ sometimes..."

Sirius swallowed. "Yeah, that's my problem, isn't it? I never think. I'm irresponsible and stupid and useless, and why do I bother even voicing an opinion on anything, huh?"

"Oh, shut up!" Remus snapped. "Like I think you're stupid or useless or any of it. I think the world of you, you idiot. I just don't _trust_ you."

Sirius' face dropped. He chewed on his lip. "Right," he said, and he couldn't help it. His eyes welled up. "After nearly two years, you don't trust me. After being friends for double that. We live together, and sleep together, and do our bloody grocery shopping together, but you don't trust me."

Remus turned around, facing away from Sirius and put his hands in his hair. That wasn't what he'd meant to say. He did trust Sirius, he just... had doubts. About himself, about whether or not he was good enough for Sirius. And if he thought it, he was sure Sirius thought it sometimes too, and then he goes and does something like lie through his teeth to everyone--even to Remus--to help keep Hestia from getting found out. Things like that just... made the doubt grow exponentially.

"I do. I just," Remus started. "I look at people sometimes. Other men. Not with any interest at all, just. I look, and I know you have nothing to worry about, because they'd never have me anyway. Then I wonder why you do, if they wouldn't, and then I wonder how many a week try for you. It's just..."

"You don't trust me to keep it in my trousers?" Sirius asked. "Just because I helped Hestia be a big twat? Remus... you're reading too far into this."

"Yes. I do seem to do that, don't I," Remus murmured, taking a deep breath and turning back around to face Sirius. "It's just... before me, you had whoever you liked as often as you pleased, and you can't tell me you don't miss that. You used to be just like Hestia."

"Remus. I mean. If I didn't want to be with you, I wouldn't be with you. I'm not the sort to stick with something I don't want to bother with."

"But _why_? Why do you bother with me?" Remus pressed, frustrated. "I don't understand why."

"Because I love you, for fuck's sake," Sirius answered, exasperated.

"I love you too, but..." Remus started.

"But _what_? How the fuck is there a 'but'? How can you end 'I love you' with a 'but' and trail off as though you're going to say something horrid? Good things do _not_ follow 'but', Remus!"

"Sorry," Remus said sharply. "I didn't realize there were rules."

"You know, bugger this. If you cared about me half as much as I do about you, we wouldn't have a fucking problem here," Sirius snapped. "If you _loved_ me as much as you bloody well claim to, then why would you not trust me? Why wouldn't you fucking understand that there is _no one else_?"

"I don't think there is anyone else," Remus said, starting to feel a bit panicked. He was still angry with Sirius, but this just seemed to keep getting worse and worse. He didn't like the direction it was going in, not one bit. "I was just upset because you apparently couldn't understand why I was upset about you helping Hestia. I do love you, you know I do. Just..." Remus didn't know how to fix the mess he had, once again, created. Instead, he stepped forward and tentatively put his hands on Sirius' shoulders. "I love you. No buts. I do."

Sirius pushed Remus' hands away. "This isn't easy fix 'I love you' bullshit, Remus. That's not a band aid you can use when you get tired of a fucking argument."

"I don't know what you want me to say, then," Remus said morosely.

"You started this shit, Remus," Sirius said. "You whipped the moral card out of your arse and you knew perfectly fucking well that I was going to fight back. I just... I don't want to fucking listen to this anymore. Maybe I'll see you tomorrow."

Sirius turned and headed back toward the Prewett's driveway.

"You always fight back," Remus said softly, and then the rest of Sirius' words registered. Tomorrow? "What do you mean, tomorrow? You won't be home tonight?"

"No," Sirius called over his shoulder as he hopped on his bike and intentionally neglected to put on a helmet just because he knew it would irritate Remus. Kick starting the engine, he added over the roar. "I just wouldn't bother waiting up, you know?"

"Sirius!" Remus shouted as Sirius backed out of the driveway. Taking a few steps towards him, Remus rather desperately searched for words. His chance was gone before he found any, though, and Sirius sped away.

Remus hated that things had been left that way. What if Sirius crashed and died and _this_ was the last conversation they'd ever had? Sirius wasn't even wearing a helmet.

Pressing a hand over his mouth, Remus tried not to cry.

Coming out of the side door to the house, Edgar spotted Remus and said, "Lily sent me. Seems to think James would've killed one of you if he came out. She practically had to pin him to his chair. Where'd Sirius go?"

Remus hastily wiped his eyes and tried not to look any more pathetic than he could help. "He left. On his bike. No helmet, the idiot."

"Ah," Edgar said, walking over and choosing to be manly about the entire situation by pretending that Remus _wasn't_ crying. "Well. He's rather a wanker, you know."

"He's not, actually," Remus said automatically. "Or, well. He is, but this was my fault anyway. I sort of told him I didn't trust him, and it all went downhill from there."

Edgar clucked his tongue. "Not that you meant it that _way_ , of course, right? Sirius just blew it completely out of proportion?"

"Of course he did. He's so completely stupid sometimes," Remus said. "He even tried to tell me I didn't love him." As his voice cracked with emotion and fresh tears spilled over, Remus was rather suddenly aware of the fact that he was talking to one of Sirius' oldest friends. "Bollocks, I'm sorry."

"Don't be," Edgar said. "Not like I haven't done it myself or anything, you know. We're all human."

"It's just, he said he wasn't coming home tonight," Remus admitted, sinking to the ground to perch on the curb. He wasn't quite sure why he was spilling to Edgar--it wasn't as though they were close--but... Edgar was just the sort of person people talked to, Remus supposed. Like Emmeline. "And the worst part of it is, after all this arguing and me telling him I don't trust him, what if he goes out and decides to prove me right?"

"Sirius has done many stupid things," Edgar said. "But even he's not that daft."

"I know. I do. And I _do_ trust him, really. I just wonder sometimes why he's wasting his time on _me_ ," Remus said. "I'm not exactly that great of a catch."

Though, what if Sirius was right? What if Remus was having doubts because he _wasn't_ feeling what Sirius was feeling?

"Don't be ridiculous," Edgar said dismissively. "There's no use being hard on yourself about it. Sirius is mad about you, that much is obvious, and while I don't presume to know the whys, I'm sure there are a few solid reasons he could name for you. You know, the funny thing, is that people ask me all the time why I'm with Dorcas, of all people. I'll bet even you've wondered it once or twice yourself, right?"

Remus forced a smile. "I'll admit, you don't seem like the best suited couple at times, though generally it seems to work well for you both."

"Exactly. When it works, it works. People spend too much time questioning the whys and whats and everything else, when they should just accept it for what it is. If you keep wondering why Sirius is with you, and why Sirius loves you... well you'll be too busy to let him actually do either."

Remus blinked down at his feet, and then looked up at Edgar, surprised and impressed. "That, Edgar, is probably about the best advice anyone's ever given me. Thank you."

"Well you're welcome, I suppose," Edgar said, smiling.

"I suppose I've just got to apologize out my arse, haven't I? If Sirius'll even listen," Remus said with a sigh.

"I don't think you owe him an apology, nor does he owe you one. You both likely said some stupid things and you've got to mutually agree that you're both complete prats."

Chuckling, Remus nodded his agreement and got to his feet. "You're a good friend, you know? To me and Sirius. Thank you. Uh, again. I owe you one."

"Don't worry about it. I'm good to listen anytime, really," Edgar offered. "Feel free to stop by and free me from Dorcas' hormones."

"Certainly. And if you ever need an escape, you can come up for a visit. Our flat is a girl free zone, most of the time."

"You don't say," Edgar teased.

***

Sirius had pretty much begged Horrace for more to do to the point where he found himself in the storeroom alphabetizing. It was four in the morning when he finally decided that there was no way Remus was still awake, and that he could sneak in and kip awhile on the sofa, and still be gone before Remus got up for work.

Quietly he opened the door and slid into the flat, shutting it softly behind him.

Remus, who was laying on the couch and unsuccessfully attempting to sleep (he'd felt weird being in his and Sirius' bed alone, so he'd moved to the sofa), opened his eyes as he heard the creak of the door. Sirius _had_ come home, then. Or else Remus was being burglarized, but he had a feeling it was the former.

Sitting up, he called, "Sirius?"

Bugger. "Lo," Sirius said. "What're you doing out here?"

"I couldn't sleep without you," Remus said softly. "Come here?"

Tentatively Sirius walked over to the couch. "You're not going to deck me for riding without a helmet, are you?"

"Don't do that," Remus said tiredly, dropping his face in his hands. "Don't joke. I was worried sick about you."

Stopping in his tracks, Sirius clucked his tongue. "Right, then. No jokes, I suppose. You don't need to worry about me, Remus, I'm a big boy. I can take care of myself."

"You're not a big boy, Sirius. You're a child," Remus said crossly. Sure, his talk with Edgar had calmed him down a lot, but he'd had all afternoon and all night to stew and remember how angry he'd been with Sirius. He wanted to fix things, of course he did, but he wasn't going to just forget it, like usual, and let Sirius off the hook, especially not since Sirius had walked away from him. "And I don't worry because I have to. I worry because I love you, and I'd be lost completely if something happened to you. That doesn't mean I'm not allowed to be angry with you."

"I'm a child, am I?" Sirius asked, folding his arms across his chest. "And what does that make you, exactly, Mum?"

"No. It makes me sick to the teeth of you not treating this like an adult relationship," Remus answered coolly. "Walking out in the middle of an argument and then staying out all night isn't grown up behaviour."

Sirius laughed shortly. "But Remus, that's the wonderful thing about being in a 'grown-up' relationship. I have the free will to do whatever the fuck I please when I don't want to listen to you anymore."

"Yes, I suppose you do," Remus said softly, and was glad for the dark of the room. It might hide his wince. It was silly that it would hit him _now_ , how much it hurt to hear that what Sirius wanted to do was just walk away and leave him hanging. "You still haven't even got a clue why I'm upset, have you? I may have said some things I shouldn't have, but you still think I'm being silly, don't you?"

"Honestly, Remus, I'm not even fucking sure what we're arguing about anymore," Sirius said.

"Is that why you stayed out so long? You figured if you just gave me enough time, I'd forgive you like usual and we wouldn't actually have to talk about it anymore?" Remus asked wryly. "You thought you'd just let things settle, and then you'd come back and we'd have great make up sex because we both hate fighting so much?"

Sirius shrugged. "I dunno. We don't like fighting, do we? And we've had time to cool down. What more do you want, Remus?"

"Respect, perhaps," Remus said softly. He really was sick of fighting. "You don't even listen to me when I talk. You publicly tear apart my opinions like I don't have the right to have them."

Sirius licked his lips. "I just... I'm defensive. I've _always_ just... you know. Ripped. On people. When I feel like I'm being, um. Threatened, I guess. I get mad."

"I'm not a threat, Sirius," Remus said softly, reaching up and taking Sirius' hand, pulling him down onto the couch next to Remus. "I'm your boyfriend, and I was upset because you lied to me, and to everyone else, to protect Hestia when she was betraying someone who was under the impression that they were in a committed relationship. I was upset because you did something that, to me, showed a complete lack of regard for... for trust and monogamy and exclusivity and whatever else. And then, in front of everyone, you made out like I was just ridiculous and old fashioned and had no concept of friendship or loyalty."

"I just. I value loyalty," Sirius said. "That's the truth. That's how I feel. And I didn't _lie_ exactly. Ed asked me outright and I told him. If you'd asked me... I mean. I would've told you. I would've."

"I did ask. At the Christmas party, I asked what was going on. You told me you were planning a surprise," Remus deadpanned. "That's a lie, however you dress it up. You led me to believe something that wasn't true, and you even tricked me into helping."

"Well. At the time I was hoping that Aidan would be stupid enough to tell Gid he was fucking Hestia, but it didn't work out," Sirius said. "Technically that was a surprise. Had you asked, 'Sirius, is something going on between Hes and Aidan?' I would've said, 'Why yes, Remus, there is.'"

Remus just stared at Sirius for a moment and then brought his hands up to rub his face. "You have a ridiculous, roundabout way of justifying things, Sirius."

"I know," Sirius answered, looking at his lap.

Sighing, Remus dropped a hand down to rest on Sirius' thigh. "Edgar said that if I keep wondering why you're with me, and why you love me, that I'll be too busy to let you do either. I shouldn't doubt you. I shouldn't doubt _us_. Whatever else you do, I should know that you _are_ with me, and you _do_ love me. That should be enough. So. As long as there's no ridiculous, roundabout way for you to justify being a total trollop and sleeping around while I'm at work, that's enough."

Sirius grinned. "I'm a trollop regardless," he said. "But Remus, I'd _never_ cheat on you. No matter what else I do that's completely stupid and ridiculous and horrid... I'm loyal. I am. I've gotten past the manwhore stage of my life."

"I know that, you idiot," Remus said fondly. "I do trust you."

"Good. Good, because if you didn't trust me I'd have to work extra hard to prove that I was trustworthy," Sirius said. "And you know how I hate hard work."

"I do love you. No buts," Remus said suddenly, recalling their conversation from the afternoon. Sensing that their fight was finally coming to and end--thankfully, as Remus wasn't quite sure how much more he could take--he smiled and asked, "Now what have you learned from this?"

"That I've got a big mouth and need to learn to think before I yell," Sirius answered. "And what've you learned?"

"That I ought not doubt my boyfriend, even when he does things I think are daft as hell," Remus replied. "And perhaps that I ought not say things I don't mean, even when we're fighting. And..."

"Now, now," Sirius said, waving a hand and cutting Remus off. "Enough of the self-hate. I hate to sound brash and forward but... can we have make-up sex now?"

"Sometimes I think you just use me for sex, you know," Remus said, though the smile on his face belied that he was lying through his teeth just to get to Sirius. He snaked a hand up the back of Sirius' shirt even as he teasingly added, "I am not a sex machine, Padfoot. Aren't I worth more to you than my body? Can't we just talk?"

"We can talk and fuck at the same time," Sirius said. "Then you're getting the best of both worlds."

***

"Bartender!" Rita called brightly from her table. "I'll have another, thanks."

She was working on Detail Oriented from the pub tonight, and her table was a mess of papers and empty glasses around her laptop. As soon as Sirius--she'd learned his name on her first visit, and he was most certainly her favourite--brought her drink over, she pushed a pen off the table and looked Sirius up and down lewdly.

"Be a love and grab that for me, will you sexy buns?"

Sirius, distracted because the bar was busy tonight and Horrace was riding his arse like a horse, reached to the floor and picked up the pen, laying it on Rita's table. He never felt the necessity to indulge in conversation with Rita because she tipped like a tropper no matter what he said or did, so Sirius simply asked, "Anything else?"

"Mm. Not right now. I've got a fuck load of shite to finish, but maybe we can nip into the stockroom for a quickie later, yeah?" she said, waggling her eyebrows at him obscenely and grinning up at him.

Sirius smirked, amused. "Oh yeah, love. Meet you back there in an hour?"

Just then, Remus appeared at Sirius' side, obviously fresh off the bus from work. He smiled casually at Rita--Sirius had told him about her, and apparently she was the same Rita who'd written about the Order in her little rag--and then touched Sirius' hip possessively. Just because he knew she wasn't a threat didn't mean Remus was going to pretend he hadn't just caught her hitting on his boyfriend. "Sorry, actually, you'll have to reschedule. You'll be busy in an hour. Take your dinner break with me?"

Sirius grinned. "You know it."

Slipping the hand down from Sirius' hip to rest daringly (at least by Remus' standards) in his back pocket, Remus turned his attention on Rita. "Hello. I'm Remus. You must be Rita?"

"Well hello. And of course he's a giant tosser. Just my luck," Rita said, rolling her eyes. "I'm still going to stare at his arse while he cleans tables."

"Fair enough," Remus said. Personally, Remus thought anyone who liked blokes might be a little hard pressed not to. It was a nice arse, after all. "Pleasure meeting you, Rita."

"Yeah, well, it bloody sucked meeting you," Rita returned brightly. "Sadly, it means Sirius will remain firmly in my spank bank and not actually in my bed."

"I'm not that giant of a tosser," Sirius said, elbowing Remus playfully.

"For all intents and purposes," Remus said, grinning, "you are. Come on, I'm hungry, and I've got news. Let's eat in the back."

"Bye boys," Rita called, sounding a little sad. "See you later, yeah Sirius?"

"You know I'm here every night, Rita," Sirius said. "Horrace, I'm taking my break!"

"Guess what I found out today?" Remus asked, excited, as soon as he and Sirius made their way into the staff room. "You'll never guess. Go on."

"The world is coming to an end?" Sirius asked. "Dorcas is having twins?"

"No. It's a good thing," Remus said with a bright smile. "Hanson is playing in London on April 22nd."

Sirius quirked an eyebrow. "And...?"

"Well. I know you like them, so I bought two tickets. I thought you and Lily could go," Remus said. "You should be far more excited to hear the news than I am to deliver it."

"You bought me tickets? Me and Lily?" Sirius questioned. "Really? _Really? Hanson_?"

"Yeah," Remus said. "They weren't very much, and Horrace will give you it off, won't he?"

"He has no choice! Hanson!" Sirius said excitedly. "But I have to go to London with Lily? We're going to come back half-eaten. Have you told her yet?"

"No. I came straight here after work," Remus said. "I thought I'd ring her tonight, or maybe we could drop over for tea or something."

"She's going to ask that we use different travel methods," Sirius said. "Because, much as I love the girl... Well. You know."

"You two will get along all right. You're both like squealing twelve year old girls when it comes to Hanson," Remus teased. "I thought that might be enough of a common denominator so that you'd both come back alive. I can try to get another couple tickets if you want James and I to come too, but I thought it would get too complicated and costly that way."

"Not to mention that you and James would throw rocks at Taylor," Sirius admonished. "I wouldn't want to endanger him. He has babies."

"Right. And I don't particularly want to see you drool over him either. Which is why, you know," Remus said, gesturing. "You and Lily. Hanson. London. Surprise!"

Sirius excitedly wrapped his arms around Remus and hugged him tightly. "You are _amazing_. Did you know?"

"Yes, quite. And no matter how much Rita tips you, I am still better at presents," Remus laughed, returning the quick embrace. "Now really, I am hungry. Can we get some Shepherd's Pie or something?"

"We can get whatever you like because you're sending me to see Hanson!" Sirius answered.

"So you're still in one piece then?" Edgar asked again, wanting to make sure for certain that Remus hadn't hacked off any of Sirius' more valuable body parts. "And he actually bought you and Lily tickets to see Hanson?" He paused as Sirius described his excitement for the millionth time, and Edgar laughed. "Right, well, don't go running off with Taylor Hanson or anything. I think Rem'd be a bit miffed. Oh she's fine. Sick you know, but all right. Right. I'll talk to you later. Bye, now."

"Ed!" Dorcas shouted from the bathroom, where she'd been seated next to the toilet for the last ten minutes. "I don't fucking like this. It's scary and gross."

"It's just sick, Princess," Edgar answered, hanging up the phone and climbing off the bed. "It doesn't last for the whole thing or anything."

"Well I want it to go the fuck away," she said miserably. "Come sit with me?"

"I'm coming," Edgar said, and came into the bathroom, leaning against the door frame. "Remus didn't kill him after all."

"Good. I'd have felt like shit if they'd split up over that," Dorcas said, and then squeezed her eyes shut as another wave of nausea hit her. One of the things she hated most in the world was puking. "Fuck. This is fucking bull shit."

"He bought Sirius and Lily tickets to see Hanson in London," Edgar added, and then sat on the floor beside Dorcas and started rubbing her back.

"Since when does _Sirius Black_ like Hanson?" Dorcas scoffed, momentarily distracted from feeling sick.

"Since they were first popular, actually," Edgar answered. "We used to take the mickey out of him something awful for it."

"God, that's so fucking hilarious," Dorcas said, but before she could elaborate, her hand flew up and grabbed onto the toilet seat and her entire body tensed. "I'm going to puke again. Fuck, fuck, fuck. Ew. Ew. Ed, I don't want to."

"It's okay, Dor," Edgar comforted, pulling her hair away from her face softly.

"Puking is absolutely the most fucking disgusting bodily funct... Oh, here I go," she said, interrupting herself and then emptying her stomach contents, once more, into the toilet. At least this time there wasn't much. She'd already puked a few minutes ago. Moaning, she reached for some toilet paper to wipe her mouth off. "Okay. I think I'm done. I feel like I'm done."

Edgar smiled. "You know, you're going to smack me for this, but you look adorable when you're puking."

"Shut up," Dorcas said tiredly, leaning her head back against his shoulder. "This is all your fucking fault, you know. Stupid fucking sperm."

"It takes two to tango, Princess," Edgar said, wrapping an arm around her chest. "Guess we weren't as, um... _protected_ as we thought we were, hmm?"

"Yeah. I guess it's a good thing I love you so much," Dorcas mumbled. "And, you know, I don't really think my parents will fucking write me out of the will or anything. We just have to get by until they croak. Once I get my inheritance, we've got it fucking _made_."

"We'll be fine," Edgar said reassuringly. "We'll be parents to... what was it Fabian called it? A 'squirming, screaming little thing that'll keep us awake for six months, but that we'll love anyway'?"

"Yeah. And, fuck, we should probably tell your parents," Dorcas admitted reluctantly. "If they find out on their own, it'll just be like we were fucking lying to them or something. I don't want them to hate me."

"They'll be... _surprised_ , but. Well. I mean. They're not going hate either of us. They'll just want us to have a plan, so. What's our plan?" Edgar asked.

"I suppose I ought to drop out of school," Dorcas said with a shrug. "I haven't been going lately anyway, and I should get a job."

"You shouldn't drop out of school, Dor, no," Edgar said. "That's not going to do the baby any good, a mum with no high school diploma."

"Ed, I have a full fucking year after this. You think I can go to high school with a baby? Not fucking happening," Dorcas said. "Besides. I bet you I could convince Mad-Eye to fucking train me in the basics or whatever. That way I could start work that much sooner."

Edgar shook his head. "My mum... she won't agree with that."

"Come on," she pleaded. "We could move to London. How fucking cool would it be to live in the big city?"

"Dor... There's no way we can move to London. I mean, I still intend to go to uni, and in order to do that I have to keep working. I'm not going to find a deal much better than the one I've got here. We can move to London, in like... six or seven years maybe. I dunno. But you have to keep going to school Dorcas," Edgar said. "You can't just quit because you're pregnant."

"I'm not," Dorcas said, getting to her feet and going into their bedroom. She pulled off her pyjamas from the night before and stood in front of a floor length mirror wearing only her underwear. "Do I look like I'm getting fat yet? I think my boobs are definitely fucking bigger. What do you think?"

Edgar rolled his eyes. "No, you don't look as though you've gotten fat. Dor, you can't distract me with nudity."

"I'm not!" Dorcas said again, turning to face him. "Look. I just think that maybe high school isn't the best fucking place to be right now, okay?"

"Why?" Edgar asked. "Because of what people will say?"

"No. Because kids are fucking expensive and I just think we should both be working," Dorcas said, not quite meeting his eyes. "I'm trying to make a responsible decision."

"Bullshit," Edgar called.

"Fuck off, Bonesie," Dorcas said, giving him a dirty look. "I don't care what people think, why the fuck would I care what they say?"

"Have you told Adam yet?" Edgar asked curiously.

"I haven't had the chance," Dorcas said. Truth was, she'd sort of been avoiding her oldest friend. "I've been fucking busy. I will."

"Right," Edgar said. "Or you'll put it off until you can't hide it anymore?"

"Fuck off," Dorcas said again as she sat down on the bed. He'd hit the nail right on the head, though, and it was obvious he knew it. "I could take fucking correspondence courses or something. I could graduate that way, and then I could still get a job."

Edgar sat down next to her. "Are you really that afraid of what they're going to say, Princess?"

"I said I wasn't," she replied, lifting a hand to her mouth to chew on a hang nail. She messed it up, though, by looking over at Ed. It was his stupid face that did her in, like usual. It was just that she could see there, plain as day, how much he cared about her, and she couldn't lie to him if she looked at him. Sighing, she amended, "It's just, all of them either thought I was a big, dirty whore or a loud, obscene lesbian, and if they aren't saying I told you so, they'll be giving me these looks, like Sirius except a thousand fucking times worse because they're all assholes. Teachers included."

"You shouldn't care, Princess. You've never cared about pushing the boundries before to get a reaction out of people," Edgar said. "Besides, it's none of their business anyhow. It's yours and my business. It's our kid, not theirs."

Dorcas nodded silently and then shifted to lay down and put her head in his lap. "If my mother knew, she'd say my carelessness has finally ruined my life, and yours on top. I can practically hear her voice. That's what everyone is going to think. They're going to think we're nuts. And if you tell anyone I'm being such a fucking wuss about this, I'll kill you."

Edgar laughed and played with her hair. "Let them think what they want. We're responsible for our actions, and so this is what we've decided to do, right? And when there's a mini-version of the two of us combined running about, wreaking havoc and dishing out advice, they'll all think that's it's too cute for words and this part of it won't even matter."

God, it was just stupid how much she loved him. It made her want to scream with the feeling of it sometimes.

"Whatever. Can we name it Tiger?" Dorcas asked, looking up at Ed with a grin. "Or... Rocket or something?"

Edgar snorted. "You're kidding. Right?"

"What's wrong with Tiger Rocket Bones?" Dorcas asked, grinning and turning towards him, propping herself up with a hand on his thigh.

"I really have to explain what's wrong with it?" Edgar questioned, grinning back. "I mean, I'm not too fussed over middle names, but I don't want to be calling out to my kid with the name 'Tiger'."

"But I like it. It's so fucking out there," she pushed, though she certainly didn't see him giving in much on it.

"Yeah, it's out there... but um. A little too out there, maybe?" Edgar insisted. "I mean, think really hard. What's a girl's name and a boy's name that you really like? That resembles normal?"

"Michelangelo," Dorcas said promptly. "Or Michelangela."

Edgar laughed again. "Seriously? _Seriously_?"

Dorcas giggled. "Fuck yeah!"

Edgar shook his head. "Well. What about... Michael, or Michele instead?"

After thinking for a moment, Dorcas patted her belly and said, "Michael or Michele Rocket Bones. I like it."

"Rocket. Not letting up on that, are you?" Edgar asked.

"Nope. Unless you'd prefer Rockstar," Dorcas said contemplatively. "Michael or Michele Rockstar Bones. Sounds sort of cool, hm? Or... Rockstar Supernova!"

"No, no, Rocket is fine," Edgar said quickly. "Rocket... I like Rocket."

Dorcas grinned. "Thought you'd fucking see it my way. Now let's have sex."


	16. Jailhouse Rock (March 28th-30th, 2007)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Where Marlene is beautiful (thankyouverymuch), Gideon and Fabian throw a dog a bone, and Severus sees the light.

**DETAIL ORIENTED** \- _MARCH 28TH, 2007_ \-  Issue 31, Volume 2

**Sirius Brings Me Chips but he Can't Suck My Nips**   
_Sexual frustration and social activism condensed_

By Rita Skeeter | Editor

Do you know what really gets me? This alarming trend of hot men turning out gay. It is getting _far_ too accepted in society if there are this many fags around. You know what I mean?

Let me break it down for you. If men as hot as the likes of that saucy Sirius the barkeep down at Horrace's Pub are pip pip cheerio with letting the whole world know he's fucking a bloke, than there is certainly not enough prejudice in this world to keep them all on the straight and narrow for the hetero team out of fear for their life.

What happened to the good old days where even if they _did_ fancy other fellows, it was kosher to shack up with a bird and just get some sausage on the side, huh? It is a travesty when a girl can't even get a guilty I'm-only-pretending-to-be-attracted-to-you-while-I-look-at-that-picture-of-your-brother/father/cousin-on-your-nightstand fuck?

Well, anyway, I digress. My own sexual frustration is really just an aside. The real issue I'd like to talk about here is The Order of Weed. You remember that little group I mentioned a few issues back that protests against Riddle?

Yes, folks, the group has a name. And they're expanding.

No more is it a secret, clandestine little gathering for only the closest friends of Gideon and Fabian Prewett. Or, well, it's likely still clandestine as with a name like that, you just _know_ there are some illegal activities going on.

My point is, it grew like the priest's prick when the youth choir sings.

Before I say much more, however, I must admit my own lack of information here. Despite no longer being Top Secret--thanks in no small part to me, I've no doubt--it has been remarkably difficult to get my greasy, greedy, groping little fingers on any information.

So. I shall leave you, dear readers, with more questions than answers. I do, however, assure you that this saucy, salacious, secret-seeking reporter is on the case! I've heard wind of a function, and I intend to crash.

Expect the juicy details sooner than later. Cross my snatch and hope to come. Y'all just have to, as usual, keep your ears up and your eyes open.

This is the mouth with the message, signing out.

***

"All right, guys," Gideon said, stopping the van and unbuckling his seatbelt. "We're here. Bobbies can't do anything to the strikers but once they get word of us being here they're going to do everything in their power to get rid of us, so. When I give the word, we leave. We're staying long enough to get a point across and help these guys, and leaving before we end up in deep shit, sound good?"

"Sounds good," Marlene said casually, pulling her hair back into a ponytail and then cracking her knuckles, grinning. It was a good group. Gideon and Fabian were both present, obviously, and Edgar, Lily, and Emmeline were all here too. Plus that new lady. What was her name? Arabella? She seemed cool enough. "Let's get this shit going then, yeah?"

"Relax, Marlene. Everyone else here is old hat at this, but this is Figgy's first go. Have you got any questions?" Fay put in, direction the last part of his statement to the woman seated next to Emmeline.

"Nah, I'm swell," Figgy said, grinning. "I'm not too out of touch with it yet, you know. I've done a good bit of protesting in my day."

"Well you'll fit right in," Edgar said, opening the van's sliding door and hoping out, holding out a hand for Lily, who'd been sitting next to him. He'd switched shifts with the night security guard to come to this today; the night shifts were longer than his regular ones anyhow, and he needed all the money he could get these days.

"It feels good to get back into it. We haven't done a protest in a while," Fabian said. "Or, well, I guess this is sort of more of a sit-in than a protest, but you know. Whatever."

"Is there a specific time everyone from inside will be walking out, or is there a signal of some sort we're to give to your contact?" Emmeline asked.

"He's waiting for us," Gideon said vaguely, shutting his door and waving up at the building. "They should be out within about five minutes, I reckon."

"Let the games begin!" Marlene said cheesily, grinning over at Gideon. She was wearing her protesting clothes today, along with a big, silly smile. She'd been much happier of late, now that she and Gideon were friends again. "Want to play word association until things get interesting?"

"No!" Fabian said. "That game is so annoying to listen to. You're not allowed. I forbid you."

"Pizza," Gideon started, loudly, winking at Marlene. He was smiling too, and since he and Marlene had _mostly_ gone back to they way they'd always been, it was fun to play teasing big brother to Fabian again.

"You two are completely ridiculous," Lily commented, amused. Harry was with James' parents today, since James was at work. It had been a long time since Lily had gotten to actually participate in Order activities and she was rather excited.

"Pineapples," Marlene said, and wrinkled her nose. She hated pineapple on pizza. "And we are not. It's tradition, playing word association before things heat up."

"Don't be a Negative Nelly, Fabian," Emmeline piped up just as Fabian was about to open his mouth and complain again. She for one was just glad to see Gideon and Marlene both smiling and happy.

"Peaches," Gideon replied. He loved canned peaches. As they headed as a group toward the factory, Gideon wrapped his arm around Marlene's shoulders.

"They're adorable," Arabella said to Edgar, who nodded and exchanged a look with Lily.

"Yeah, adorable is one word," Lily chimed in.

"Whipped cream!" Marlene exclaimed, laughing and remembering the night they'd ate three cans of peaches and two of whipped cream between them as they'd watched Beavis and Butthead reruns on the telly. Her arm snaked around his waist, and she felt like the two of them were the same impenetrable, cohesive little unit they used to be. Gid and Kinny were _back_.

"It's not that I'm not glad he isn't moping around like a rain cloud anymore," Fabian said, falling into step with Lily. "It's just... the word association game and I do not have a good history. They used to play the 'exclude Fabian' version for hours, and it was just one inside joke after another, and they'd laugh and laugh and it was _so boring_."

"How do you think it will all turn out?" Emmeline asked, the question posed to the whole group of them following Gid and Marlene. "Great, or disaster? There never is any in between with those two."

Gideon laughed along with Marlene, and kissed her on the side of the head before saying, "Fuzzy handcuffs!" bringing back memories of a night when Kin had handcuffed Gideon to his own bed and licked whipped cream off of his chest.

"I don't know what to expect. I mean," Lily shook her head. "He's still with Hestia despite Aidan Lynch, and she's still with Stubby despite the fact that he's the biggest wanker on the face of the planet. While it's nice to see them happy... I dunno."

"While it's nice to see them happy, it'd be better to see them pull their heads out of their arses and stop pretending that what they're doing isn't absolutely ridiculous?" Edgar asked.

Figgy furrowed her eyebrows. "Wait a mo', you mean, those two aren't... a couple?"

"Blue balls," Marlene said wickedly, reaching over to pinch Gideon's side teasingly as she recalled how once, Marlene had left Gideon handcuffed to his bed and pretended to go home. It had been one of the more uncomfortable ten minutes of his life, she expected.

"No, not technically," Fabian said, and rolled his eyes to show how ridiculous he thought it all was. "They used to be. They're madly in love with each other. But they're both daft prats and dating other people."

"Indeed," Emmeline agreed. "I don't know what exactly they think they're doing."

"Movie theatres," Gideon countered, waggling his eyebrows, reminding Marlene of that one time she'd _tried_ to give him a blowjob while they'd been at the movies.

"That is the strangest thing..." Figgy said, amazed. They were so obviously mad about one another, but they were... seeing other people?

"You're not kidding," Edgar said.

"You know what Marlene is like, though," Lily added. "Gideon is probably sick of running after her. If they do, well. Whatever it is they're doing, she won't run. He just has to watch what sorts of labels he uses."

" _Armageddon_ ," Marlene returned, reminding Gideon not to get _too_ cocky now. He'd cried _in public_ during that movie.

"That is the strangest thing..." Figgy said, amazed. They were so obviously mad about one another, but they were... seeing other people?

"You're not kidding," Edgar said.

"You know what Marlene is like, though," Lily added. "Gideon is probably sick of running after her. If they do, well. Whatever it is they're doing, she won't run. He just has to watch what sorts of labels he uses."

"Armageddon," Marlene returned, reminding Gideon not to get too cocky now. He'd cried in public during that movie.

"Smart girl," Fay said to Lily. "That's exactly what he's doing. Supposedly, last time she told him no more sex, but you just know that'll last, oh, until they get another chance to go at it. So long as she doesn't have to put a big scary title to it, she's fine. She's also insane, mind, but he's nutters too, so that works."

"I can agree with that," Emmeline quipped. They were both completely bats, for sure. And they'd better bloody well end up together.

"Aerosmith," Gideon said, rolling his eyes. That had been one of their more eventful concerts, where they'd met Steven Tyler and gotten photos with him.

"No more sex my arse," Edgar laughed. "They've probably done it 10 times since that and are trying to keep it a secret. Because they think that they're stealth or summat."

"Lipstick," Marlene said brightly. They'd done it in the loo at that Aerosmith concert, and she'd gotten lipstick on his collar.

"Oi, enough of that now. It's go time," Fabian called, jogging to catch up with Gideon and Marlene as they came up to the building right as workers were beginning to file out, looking nervous. Fay smiled reassuringly at the nearest group of them and said loudly, "This is a perfectly legal strike. You can't be arrested."

"Yeah, but we can still be fired," a young girl pointed out. "I need this job."

"You deserve better, honey," an older man said in response. "This is for the best."

"He's not going to fire anyone," Gideon said loudly to the crowd, taking on a persona he'd almost forgotten he'd had once upon a time. He used to be the awe-inspiring leader, but for the last few years he'd more or less been un-inspiring. "We're here to give you lot media coverage. You deserve to be treated fairly where you work, and unless _everyone_ knows what's going on here, nothing is going to get done, because Riddle thinks he's bloody God in Heaven!"

"And look! The media coverage has arrived," Rita called, pleased at her impeccable timing. She couldn't help but pause at Gideon's side and strike a bit of a pose. One long, red-nailed hand was perched on her hip and the other was clutching a tape recorder as she balanced on her perilously high, shiny, black snakeskin print heels. Her tight, mid-thigh length zebra print skirt, white shirt, red neck sash, red lipstick, and elaborately curled hair had all been carefully pre-planned and flawlessly executed. She was sure there'd be proper press coverage (she'd personally invited all the local news stations) and she planned on looking fabulous for it. "The name is Rita Skeeter. Mind if I have a word, Prewett? Either of you, really. I've just got a few questions. I'll get around to the others shortly."

"Are you for real?" Fabian asked with a wide grin. "You look like you picked your outfit out of a time capsule a bunch of prostitutes from the fifties put together. That is a _hideous_ skirt."

Lily laughed into Edgar's shoulder, not wanting to draw to much attention to herself. "If Narcissa Black saw that woman right now, she'd have a heart attack," she said in a stage whisper to Ed.

Gideon quirked an eyebrow. "'Are you for real' is right," he said. "And it depends on what sort of questions, really. We're, not surprisingly, not big fans of yours, Miss Skeeter."

"Oh, pish. It's all in the past," Rita said, grinning widely. "I'm not leaving without an interview or two, and you'll not be shocked to hear I can make quite the bloody nuisance of myself."

"No kidding," Marlene said, not surprised. "Look, we can't make you leave just like you can't make us talk, so. Looks like this is going to be an interesting sit-in."

"And what's your name?" Rita asked, quirking her eyebrows. She didn't know too many of the locals, being that she'd only dropped out of uni (or rather, gotten kicked out for some of the accusations she made in Volume 1 of Detail Oriented) the end of last year. "Don't be shy, love. Come on now."

"Step off, _Miss Skeeter_ ," Gideon said, feeling a little protective of Marlene. "Who we are is none of your business. We're not here for your amusement, we're here to help this lot." He gestured to the crowd.

"Help them how, exactly? Are you staging a dramatic revolt?" Rita asked after clicking on her tape recorder, far too used to being rebuffed to really take much notice of it. "I went to journalism school. I swear I won't misquote."

"Station nine is here," Emmeline remarked casually as a van pulled up and began unloading equipment.

Gideon glanced over and smiled. "Good. Lets get to work then," he said, and the lot of them sat in front of the group of employees in a straight line. "Go on then!" Gideon called back to everyone. "Sit down! Fay, what do you think, chanting, singing?"

"We will, we will not be moved is so passé," Fay grinned, sitting on the other side of Gideon from Marlene. They were practically attached at the hip, now. "I vote chant. Fair hours, fair wages, fair treatment?"

"Simple and to the point," Emmeline agreed.

"Sounds good," Gideon said, and with that started chorusing, "Fair hours! Fair wages! Fair treatment!" with the occasional fist pump.

The lot of them joined in, first Fay, Marlene, Lily, Edgar, Emmeline, and Figgy, of course, but eventually the crowd of forty or so employees chimed in too. Station nine began to film, a reporter making his way through the crowd, talking to the odd worker here and there, and Rita managed to position herself near Gideon and Fabian.

"Do you do this sort of thing all the time? How long have you been working against Riddle? You've been arrested a fair few number of times, from what my research has told me. Do you think you'll get arrested again today?" Rita asked the two brothers quickly, barely pausing between questions.

Gideon purposely ignored Rita and kept right on chanting along with the crowd. The last thing the Order needed was more shitty publicity thanks to her.

"Oh come _on_ , you frigid cunts," Rita snapped, and then lifted her recorder to speak directly into the microphone. "Oops, scratch that last."

"Sod off, you unfashionable cow," Fabian retorted. "We're working."

"And calling us cunts doesn't exactly put you on our good side!" Edgar chimed in with a grin. "Not that you were before, mind."

"I could be a great asset to you, you know. I really do have quite a few readers, and most of them are in Vol de Mort's target market," Rita said. "This could be the start of a wonderful relationship, if you'd just fucking give me some answers."

"You're wasting your breath and our time," Marlene replied. "If they want to talk to you, they will. But right now, we're busy."

"If you're a good little girl and shut your trap for 10 minutes, we'll talk to you later," Gideon bargained. "Now go bug someone else, seriously."

After curling her lip at Gideon in a sneer, Rita mimed zipping her lips shut and went off to talk to some of the workers. Maybe she could get them to nick her free stuff from inside.

"I don't know if we have ten minutes," Emmeline said, leaning in confidentially. She was once again the first to notice the new arrival, and she nodded up at the ritzy sports car that was pulling in. Rodolphus Lestrange, head of Vol de Mort security, got out, surveying the scene with obvious distaste, and flicked open his cell phone. No doubt the police would be quick on his heels. It was so fast that Em couldn't help but wonder if they'd been tipped off. Again. It certainly wouldn't shock her. "Lestrange is here."

"Bugger," Gideon muttered. "We can play it off until the bobbies show up. Then we're out of here."

"Uh. Which is like, now," Fay said as he heard the squeal of a siren in the distance. "You know, I really don't like them knowing about all of our stuff in advance. It makes it _really difficult_ to be effective."

Gideon sighed. "All right. That's it, they're on their own now," he said, standing up and waving to his contact to let them know they were out. Buggering spies and all else... Gideon was beginning to wonder what the point in bothering was anymore. "Let's head back."

Lily stood and dusted her skirt, looking back at the crowd of workers sadly. She knew Gideon didn't really _want_ to leave, but they had to leave. Some of them just couldn't afford to get arrested. "Next time," she said, catching step with Gideon, "Perhaps we could do a little filtering, you know? Pick a handful of core members and see if you get tipped off. When everyone knows you can't be sure of anything."

"Good idea," Fabian said, though he hated to do it. He was still sort of wishing that they'd just find a bug in the basement somewhere, and it wouldn't have been anyone after all. Just a tiny electronic device that he could crush in his hand. It was more than that, of course, he knew that. But he liked to hope. "Right, well. Running time now. Come on, everyone."

Emmeline, Figgy, and Marlene got to their feet as well, and then Marlene held a hand out for Edgar. "Arse off the ground, lazy Bones. Running time, indeed."

Rita watched the Order leave, confused, and then turned back to the fellow she was speaking to. He was giving her some fantastic quotes. When the police finally did arrive, only a few short moments later, Rita was quite pissed indeed to find herself in handcuffs.

***

"Do you have any idea who I am? You've no right to arrest me. I didn't do anything wrong!" Rita shouted for about the twelfth time at a passing guard. None of them paid her any attention, though. They'd heard her complaints already, and were having none of it. She didn't have any money for bail, and she certainly wasn't going to call her father. Her fastest chance out of here, it seemed, would be irritating them into letting her go. They couldn't hold her more than 24 hours, she knew, unless they were charging her with something, but she certainly did not intend to sit around for a whole _day_. "Freedom of the press act! Ever heard of it? Let me out, you dirty swine. I'm hungry!"

"Skeeter!" a guard called, coming into the hallway in front of the holding cell and then unlocking the door. "You made bail."

"I did?" Rita asked, confusion bringing her up short. "How? My father isn't here, is he?"

"I'm not at liberty to say," the guard told her, holding the door open. "Now get out, _please_ , you've given the entire shift a migraine."

"Fantastic. No more than you deserve for bloody arresting me," she said snidely. "I feared for my life and my virtue, you know, the way some of the criminals were looking at me. Barbarians."

As she spoke, Rita waved jauntily at the only other person she'd seen, a middle-aged fellow who had apparently been drunk in public after being fired, who was still sitting in the holding cell he'd been put in hours ago because he was too scared to call his wife until he knew for sure he was fully sober.

The guard raised an eyebrow. "Leave? Now? Any time this side of Christmas?"

"Yes, yes, fine," Rita said distractedly. No one appreciated her humour. "Leaving. Now. This side of Christmas."

Gideon and Fabian were waiting outside on the sidewalk for Rita. Their 'in' at the station had given them a call to let them know she'd been taken in, and they'd decided to throw the old dog a bone. "It's taking her bloody long enough," Gideon said.

Finally, as she alternately fluffed her hair and touched up her lipstick by way of the mirror compact from her purse, Rita stepped out of the station. As soon as she dropped her makeup back into her purse and looked around, she froze. The Prewetts? Really?

Recovering, she strutted towards them, smiling in a calculating sort of way, and asked, "Here for that interview, then?"

"Something like that," Gideon said. "Do we get a thank you?"

"For what?" Rita asked blankly, not putting two and two together.

"For bailing you out, you daft cow," Fabian said, but he was smiling.

Rita stared for a moment, and then burst out laughing. "Oh you didn't! Wild. You thought it'd be handy to have me owe you one, didn't you?"

"No," Gideon answered. "But we need to come to a mutual agreement about your reportings on the Order, and this seemed like a lovely opportunity. Fancy a cuppa and a chat?"

"Certainly, gorgeous," Rita said, patting him on the cheek. "I'll even treat. How generous of me."

Together the three of them walked just up the block to a nearby cafe, and seated themselves at a table by the window. Once there was a drink in each of their hands, Gideon waggled his eyebrows at Rita and said, "Well? Isn't this your wet dream? Hop to it then, we haven't got all day."

"I just got out of the clink, give a girl a moment to breathe," Rita said brightly, but it took her all of three seconds to fish out her tape recorder and notepad. During interviews, she liked to make notes on things that wouldn't come up on the tape recorder, like how sexy Gideon looked, or how many times Fabian flipped his hair. "Okay. So. The Order of Weed. What is it? What's your goal? Your _purpose_?"

"I should think that would be obvious, really," Fabian said. "We're an activism group. We focus mainly on stopping Riddle and his un-enviro-friendly activities, but we branch out every so often. I do hope your questions will get more interesting than that."

"Hey, a good reporter always starts with the basics," Rita said. "Besides. I don't want to scare you away. You're very gay, aren't you? Please say Gideon, at least, likes girls. I don't know if you've read my latest article, but..."

"We're not talking about fucking, we're talking about the Order," Gideon interrupted.

"All right, all right. So. How serious is it, do you think?" she asked, leaning forward eagerly, tea all but forgotten. "Does Riddle want you gone? Does Riddle even know you exist? Does Riddle want in your knickers? Which is it?"

"It's actually quite serious," Gideon explained. "The majority of our protests for the last year or so have been tipped off. Riddle's main sidekicks show up with the bobbies in tow far too early for comfort, like today."

"Yeah, thanks for that," Rita said, rolling her eyes, and then figured she ought not be too hard on them seeing as they bailed her out. Even if it was their fault she got arrested in the first place. "Never mind. Have you ever met him personally? Is he as ridiculous face to face as he seems on telly? Has he ever threatened you? What indications have you got that it's _serious_ serious?"

"We've met him a number of times. Crashed a few of his shows, that sort of thing. Marlene threw a radish at his hummer that one time, remember that Fay?"

"Ooh, who's Marlene?" Rita asked, jumping on the name. "Was she there today?"

"Yep. The girl sitting next to me," Gideon said, figuring Rita had taken notice of all the members present. "She was the first to join after Fay and I formed the Order. We've been mates since we were babies."

"The sort of homely one that was stuck to you like condom to cock? How sickeningly quaint," Rita said, curling her nose. "Give me some more names. Who else was there today?"

"You know, it really would not be that hard to find out on your own," Fabian said, speaking up again. "And it wouldn't kill you to be a little more polite."

"Why should I have to? I'm asking you now," Rita replied quickly. "And I don't really do polite, sugar plum. It's my edge."

"Don't talk about my oldest friend like that and I'll give you more names," Gideon said, irritated. "She's not homely. She's beautiful."

"Friend, you say?" Rita asked, waggling her eyebrows and writing down 'G+M=LOVE'. "You're so completely transparent. But deal. I'll be nice about your snuggle bear. Names?"

"Edgar is the blond fellow who was there today, and the lovely redhead's name is Lily. They're two of our older members as well," Fabian said, feeling a little wary about it. He knew there was really no harm in it, but still.

Gideon's cheeks were red as he added, "Lily's husband James is a member as well, and his two mates Sirius and Remus."

"Sirius? He works at Horrace's?" Rita asked, surprised. "He's a member?"

"Indeed. One of our most active," Fabian answered.

"Can I join?" Rita asked. After a short pause, she added, "Actually, I don't suppose joining up would give me a shot at getting in his trousers, would it? Stupid homosexuals. Never mind. Okay, enough names. What's the most extreme protest you lot have ever done?"

Gideon looked at Fabian and shrugged. "We threw paint at his runway models during a show a few years back," he said.

"Oh, I heard about that. He was positively _irate_. I thought his little head was going to explode right there on national television," Rita mused. "Did you get caught?"

"Not by the authorities, but Riddle knows it was us," Fay answered. "He knows most of what we've done, which is likely why he hates us so much."

"Ed had that run in with Lestrange a while ago too, when we crashed another show. She got a hold of him and was like... shaking him. He ended up breaking her nose," Gideon said. "Safe to say they've made it priority to know who we all are."

"Scary, scary. You lot are on some sort of list, no doubt," Rita said, shaking her head. "You know, I think his stupid Death Eaters club is all about you. I heard a short fellow talking about it on the tube."

Gideon furrowed his eyebrows. "'Short fellow'?" Gideon asked. "What did he look like, exactly? I'm not familiar with Riddle's short fellows. He tends to prefer them tall, dark, and homicidal."

"Completely unremarkable, actually. I couldn't see him well. He was hanging about with a few of the tall, dark, and homicidal variety," Rita said. "And some ridiculously slutty models. They were all over everyone. I could hardly stand to watch. I did, mind. It's my duty as a citizen of the press to keep my ears up and my eyes open."

"Think, please. It'd be really helpful to get a description or two," Fabian said. "Really, really. Especially the short fellow. None of Riddle's people that we've ever met have been short."

"Why? What's going on?" Rita asked curiously.

"Question, Rita," Gideon posed, before explaining. "How'd you find out about the Order in the first place?"

"Oh, here and there," Rita said secretively. "I simply can't reveal my sources."

"Uh huh," Fabian said, raising his eyebrows at her. "Rita?"

"I can't say!" Rita said again, laughing. "Stop looking at me!"

"Rita Skeeter! You horrible, horrible woman," Fabian pushed, grinning now as well. "Spit it out! I'll try to get Sirius to take off his shirt for you."

"Never!" she cried, then took a sip of tea and said promptly, "Okay. I met him at a pub and he was wearing a funny hat. His name was... Elfish or something ridiculous. I have it written down somewhere. I save all my research. Now what's this about Sirius and his scrumptious naked chest?"

"Elphias. _Elphias_?" Gideon questioned, looking dubiously at Fabian. "The bloke has been a complete twat lately, but I can't imagine him ratting us out."

"He wasn't _ratting_ , exactly," Rita said shiftily. "He was drunk and miserable and he needed an ear to talk at, that's all. And a story's a story, you know. I sort of... flew by the lace of my knickers with it, if you know what I mean. He hardly let up anything at all."

"You wheedled it out of him, didn't you? He'd never have told you otherwise, even drunk," Fabian snapped, suddenly feeling both far less amused by Rita and far more defensive of Elphias than he had a moment ago.

Gid shot Fabian a confused look and then said, "Enough about Elphias, any more questions?"

"Right, right. I've got loads. You can start by telling me about this short man thing. Why all the interest in him?" Rita asked.

"Oh, well," Fay stalled, wondering how wise it would be exactly to advertise the presence of a spy. "That's a _whole_ other story."

"Lets just say," Gideon said, choosing his words carefully. "That Riddle didn't find out our handy numbers by accident."

"Ooh, a scandal. I do so love a scandal."

Meanwhile, just across the street from the three having a cuppa in a cozy tearoom, Severus Snape sat sullenly in the backseat of a paddy wagon as it pulled into the station.

His face was arranged into a dark, ugly scowl, and Severus really wished they wouldn't touch him so much. It wasn't as though he was incapable of walking from the car to the cell without assistance, and like he would try to run or something, handcuffed as he was. He was in a bit of a daze, though, and without really noticing much of anything at all, he found himself handcuff-free and standing in front of a phone.

Ah. This must be his one phone call. Picking it up and dialling mechanically, Severus waited.

"What?" Bellatrix Lestrange's sharp voice asked.

"It's Snape," Severus said shortly, his voice dull. "I'm being detained at the Salcombe Police Station. Send someone to collect me."

"What did you do, exactly?" Bellatrix asked, uninterested. As though she would send anyone from the VDM ring to a police station for the likes of Severus Snape. Useless tool.

"Exactly what you lot told me to, and I got caught," Severus snapped. "I'm being charged with breaking and entering. Thank you for that. Now send someone to come collect me."

"I think not," Bellatrix answered curtly, a hint of maliciousness in her tone. "If this comes back to us, Snape, then I will personally see to it that you are disposed of _properly_. Ta, now." She hung up.

"You despicable little--" Snape started, but didn't bother finishing the sentence. She was gone anyway, and it was better that way. If she'd stayed on the line and heard him, he'd likely not have to worry about making bail, as she'd have him pinned for something that would keep him in much longer. The cow. Albus Dumbledore's financial records were _not_ worth sitting in here for fuck knew _how_ long.

Well, not like he had a choice now. Hanging up the phone for a moment, he turned to face the men in uniform waiting outside the door for him and wondered if they'd notice if he tried to make another call. As soon as he picked the phone up again, they were inside the room, dropping heavy hands on his shoulders.

"Not now. Come on, you," one of them said gruffly.

"Fantastic. Time to show me to my quarters then?" Severus sneered. "I do hope the quilt is down. I don't want to catch a chill."

"You're the second mouthy little thing we've had in today, and I'll tell you right now, we're sick of it. Shut up and start walking."

"Charming," Severus muttered as they prodded him towards the door. What a great mess he was in this time. Fucking Vol de Mort.

***

Lily waved at James as he pulled out of the driveway and headed to work. She lifted Harry a little more on her hip and laughed to herself as she realized (in her apron, barefoot, and with her son in her arms) how much she'd become a 19-year-old June Cleaver.

"Oh my, Harry," she said as he drooled happily all over his bib. "Mummy's going to go crazy if she doesn't find a job soon. You're a big boy now, hmmm?" she asked, and he answered with a gurgly baby giggle. "Wouldn't you like to spend more time with Nana Potter so mummy doesn't go bats?"

The phone rang then, and Lily sighed, shifting Harry once again and heading into the kitchen. She put the receiver to her ear and said, "Hello?" only to be met with silence.

What was he _thinking_ calling Lily? He ought to just hang up. He ought not bother her. It was totally crazy. She probably didn't even remember him. They hadn't been that close in school, and he hadn't seen her since graduation...

"Lily," he said after a moment. Stupid, stupid, stupid. Should've hung up. "It's Severus."

"Oh, Severus!" Lily exclaimed, surprised, but pleased. She hadn't heard from him in so long! "Give me a moment to set Harry down so I can talk to you properly." She sat Harry quickly in his high chair and gave him his stuffed rabit off of the kitchen table before returning to the phone and saying, "There now. So? To what do I owe the pleasure?"

"Ah, well. Actually, I'm in Salcombe," he said, and looked sidelong at the cops waiting for him. He was shocked by Lily's enthusiastic response, and found himself damn near blushing at how pleased she sounded. He was a pathetic man, and _she_ was married. "Oh, I don't know if you know, I moved to London after school was done. But since I was... in the area, I thought I might call. How are you?"

"Salcombe, really? " Lily asked, somewhat suspicious. He sounded like he'd rather be anywhere other than where he was. "Where in Salcombe? We'll have to get together, that is, if you don't mind my bringing Harry along. You haven't even seen him yet, have you?" she added, pleased at the possibility of human contact beyond the baby talk of her infant son. "And I'm fine, you know. Looking for work now that Harry's getting bigger. James' mum is going to be looking after him."

"That would be wonderful," Severus said, and then sighed. There was no more avoiding it. "Only, ah, I'm at the station at the moment. The police station. I, ah, got myself arrested yesterday. I'm not... I don't really know why I'm calling. I certainly don't expect you to..."

"The police station?" Lily questioned. "Well I'll just come pick you up then. And don't bother with the 'don't expects' and all else. I'll be a few minutes though, Severus, because Harry and I are still in our jammies. So hang tight, all right?"

"Lily," Severus said, and then decided against arguing. He knew Lily well enough to know it was pointless, and instead he just smiled and tried not to think about how wonderful it would be to see her again. Even if it dredged up all sorts of feelings he thought he'd left behind. "Thank you, Lily. Take your time. I've been here all night, another hour or two won't kill me."

"Oh, I won't be that long. I'm a mum now, Sev," she said. "I've learned to move fast. See you in a bit then!"

"Indeed," he said, and then hung up the phone, smiling like an idiot. He was oddly unsurprised that his own people had hung him out to dry, while he hadn't even had to ask Lily and she was already on her way. More than anything else, Severus felt that said something about his choice of acquaintances.

"A friend is on the way," Severus said to the men at the door. "Is it all right if I wait outside? I've been released, haven't I?"

"Yeah, whatever. Bugger off then," the policeman said.

"How incredibly professional of you," Severus sneered, and then walked out of the telephone room and into the lobby, continuing on to wait outside. He'd sit on the stairs until she got there. It was better than being inside, even if it was cold. Severus had a jacket.

Lily had herself and Harry cleaned up and ready to go in about twenty minutes, he in his snowsuit and her in a pair of jeans matched with her nicest plaid winter coat. It was a fairly nice day outside, and rather than take the old car (the one James' parents had given them, and that she and Sirius had used to take Remus to meet the Prewetts once upon a time) Lily suited Harry up in his stroller and started walking. They could both use the fresh air, and it was only a few blocks away anyhow.

Severus hadn't been waiting long when he Lily's red hair in the distance. He got to his feet and walked down the stairs towards her, stopping a short distance away and trying (unsuccessfully) to control that damnable smile on his face.

"Lily," he greeted her warmly. "It's great to see you again. You're looking well. And this must be Harry. Congratulations, by the way. For the wedding and the child and everything. I don't suppose I ever said it."

"Well we did send you an invitation to the wedding, Severus," Lily said, smiling. "I'd just assumed you were busy with your budding career in the big city. And you look smashing, by the way. The lack of make-up does quite a bit for you."

"Oh. Thank you," Severus said awkwardly, hoping he wasn't blushing. He'd already said she looked well. Would it be overkill to comment on how beautiful she was? He'd thought he'd grown up so much since East Portlemouth, but here he was, acting just like a schoolboy again. He was distracted from his thoughts by Harry shaking a rattle and making a noise. Severus had never been good with children, nor had he ever _liked_ them. But Harry looked a great deal like Lily, and after a moment of hesitation, he crouched down and looked at the child. "Hello, Harry. You're one lucky child, you know, having a mother like Lily."

"Moo bee!" Harry babbled, and then reached out with one little hand and tugged on Severus' hair, now long and straight, hanging just past his shoulders.

Lily laughed. "He likes you, Severus," she said. "He looks more and more like James everyday, although everyone says he has my eyes.

"He looks exactly like you, Lily," Severus said. "He's actually quite precious. Nothing like that oaf Potter."

Smiling, Lily said, "Now, now. That's my husband you're talking about. Anyhow!" she clapped her hands together. "Harry and I are taking you out to breakfast. No buts!"

"I wouldn't dream of arguing with you, Lily," Severus said, even as he secretly planned to snatch the bill and make it all his treat. Nonetheless, he got to his feet and moved to push the stroller for her. "Where would you like to go? I suppose we do have quite a lot to catch up on."

"There's just a cafe right here," Lily indicated. "They make _fabulous_ omlets. The O- My _friends_ and I come here all the time." Shit. She'd forgotten how friendly she used to be with Severus, and since she'd spent most of her time lately with people who knew about the Order, it had nearly slipped right off of her tongue.

Severus noticed Lily's slip of the tongue and debated how to handle the situation. He knew she was in the Order. In fact, he knew all about the Order, thanks to Peter. She, however, did not know about his position with Vol de Mort. At the very least, Severus thought he ought to warn her that he was the enemy. She deserved that much. And if she suddenly cut their breakfast short, he wouldn't be surprised. It would be no less than he deserved.

"You weren't the first person I called. I used my one phone call to get in touch with my superior, Bellatrix Lestrange," he said evenly. "I believe you know her?"

Lily blinked. "Bellatrix _Lestrange_? Severus. Don't tell me you work for Vol de Mort. And... how did you know I'd know her?"

"I thought it was only fair to tell you, considering," Severus said, already resigned to the idea of her leaving before they even reached the doors of the cafe. He tried to steal himself for her wrath before he spoke the next words, the trepidation evident in his voice. "I do work for Vol de Mort. And I've known all about the Order for quite some time."

Lily ran her hand over the length of her face. "Oh. You have. And you knew we were... right," she said slowly. "I suppose then, you know... whatever it is they're planning? Or well, we suspect they're planning something." She wouldn't run. She was a fair person, or at least she'd learned to be more fair throughout her relationship with James. She listen. She'd hear him out. He might even tell her something useful.

"No," Severus said immediately, sounding almost surprised at her assumption. "They tell me very little. I can imagine T.M. and Bellatrix wouldn't exactly stand idly by, but I've heard nothing about any plans. I swear, Lily."

"Okay," Lily said, stopping in front of the doors to the cafe. "And why do you work for Vol de Mort, Severus?"

Severus paused thoughtfully and frowned to himself. "They offered me something I didn't think I could find elsewhere." Respect, money, power. They paid him, certainly, but not well and he certainly had no respect or power. It was a good question, honestly, and he had no good answer. "It isn't... it's just a job, Lily. You, ah, don't seem to be running. Does that mean I should open the door and ask for a table for three?"

"It's not just a job, that's the thing," Lily said, slowly. "You're working for a company that has threatened the lives of my family, and of my friends. And you _knew_ about the Order? We're honest, hard-working people, Severus. Gideon and Fabian _started_ the Order to try and make a difference. I joined the Order when I was 13, Severus. Think about that, and then decide if we're still having breakfast."

"What would you have me say, Lily? What loyalty do I have to anyone in the Order but _you_? A great number of them did their absolute best to make my life miserable," Severus said, suddenly feeling defensive. "I owe them nothing, and I haven't done anything wrong."

"Right. A whole two of them treated you like shit, Severus. They're human beings. These are human lives! Brothers and friends and lovers that Riddle would happily see drowned in the Atlantic if it meant his shows would go off without a hitch!"

"Don't you think you're being a tad over-dramatic?" he asked, lip curling a little into a sort of half sneer, as though he couldn't quite stand to make such a face at Lily but he was trying anyway.

"No! Are you not hearing me?" Lily asked, incredulous. "They would toss Harry in front of moving traffic if they could, because they know it would kill me and James in the process!"

Severus was about to reply when he recalled a scene from a few weeks back that had all been very hushed up. T.M. had gotten angry and thrown a heavy, sharp paperweight at one of his secretaries. She'd needed eight stitches on her forehead. The man was a basket case, and many of his employees were no better.

"I would never let them," Severus said finally, the words his own attempt at making peace. "I'd never let them hurt you."

"By working with them you already have," Lily answered, reaching down and unbuckling Harry from his stroller. "That blue button will make it fold. We best get inside before they stop serving breakfast."

"Lily," Severus said, but found he had no other excuses. He pressed the blue button and folded up the stroller, carring it in under one arm. He pulled the door open for her and then followed her in, stopping a nearby employee and saying, "Bring us a high chair, please."

A short, silent moment later, they were seated at a small table in the corner, Harry was buckled into a high chair, and they were poring over the menus. Or, rather, Severus was watching Lily over the top of his menu and trying to think of something to say.

"Are you suggesting I quit?" he finally asked. "Just up and quit and join you to fight the good fight? You know I couldn't."

"I'm not suggesting you do anything you don't want to do, Severus," Lily answered. "I just ask that you consider what you are doing. What would Harry like, hmm? Some pancakes with your syrup sweetums?" Harry giggled and smiled toothlessly at at his mother before squealing and smacking his hands on the high chair table.

It was odd, really, that watching Harry, a boy he'd just met who couldn't even speak to say the things Lily could, made Severus feel more guilty than he ever had.

"It is my understanding that there is a spy," Severus said finally after watching Harry bounce in his chair for a moment. It wasn't worth Severus' life to give Peter away (and Severus could admit that was what it would come to if they found out), but he could do his best. He was Peter's liaison, after all. "I could... lessen the damage he is able to cause. That is, I could arrange for there to be... miscommunications. Your protests might go better, then."

"You're sure you want to do that, Severus?" Lily asked.

"Oh, don't try to dissuade me _now_ ," Severus said, smiling slightly. "You women never can make up your minds."

Lily smiled back, peering over the edge of her menu. "You know, underneath all those black clothes and that dark, sinister exterior, there's a nice man, Severus."

"Quiet. You'll ruin my reputation," he teased, and shut his menu. Sobering, he said, "Tell me about your life, Lily. You're happy, aren't you?"

"A little bored right now," she answered honestly, with a shrug. "Not that there's anything wrong with spending my days with Harry, but I'm looking forward to starting work after his birthday. But I'm very happy, yes," she added. "James isn't wasting my life, you'll be glad to hear."

"That's good," Severus replied. "I had worried about that. I still don't think he's good enough for you."

The waiter approached then, and before he even had a chance to speak, Severus said, "Coffee, black. And if it's been sitting there for more than fifteen minutes, make a fresh pot."

"Green tea, please," Lily requested.

"And for the little man?" the waiter asked, smiling at Harry, who drooled pleasantly.

"He's fine, thank you," Lily answered. And when he went to go get drinks, Lily said to Harry, "The silly man doesn't think mummy has your nums, Harry. It's that silly?"

Harry clapped, and Lily reached into the stroller basket for a bottle of breast milk. "We'll have to get him to bring us some hot water though, so it's nice and warm for your tummy, isn't that right sweetums?" She tickled his round little belly and he squealed again.

"You're such a _mum_ ," Severus said, but his voice was awed rather than teasing. He was amazed by her, to be frank. It was nothing new, really, just new subject matter to be amazed over. Rolling his eyes a little as she tickled Harry again, he added, "And honestly, you really need to get out more."

Lily laughed. "Everyone works, so it's just me and Harry until James gets home. One of the girls in the Order, Dorcas.... I suppose you know who she is... She's started stopping by more and more after school. Her and her boyfriend are having a baby themselves, and I think she's looking for me to teach her how to be a mum."

"She's the one who spat on Crabbe a few months back, isn't she?" Severus said, furrowing his eyebrows. "She's just a child herself."

"It happens," Lily said, glancing at Harry with a smile. "But Dor is a different breed altogether. I hope it's not too much for her to handle." She sighed. "How about you Severus? Are you happy?"

"Not especially," he replied blandly. "Not that I ever expected to be. But, well. It _is_ good to see you. We'll have to keep in touch properly. You're welcome to visit me in London any time."

"I'll definitely take you up on that," Lily agreed. "And you should come home more often. Without getting arrested. We wouldn't want Harry to forget you."

"Bas muh!" Harry squealed gleefully, trying to reach for his unheated bottle. "Bub!"

Severus looked down at Harry. He was just a tiny little person who couldn't do anything for himself and Severus had always disliked kids, yet... He reached out a hand and Harry wrapped one of his miniature hands around one of Severus' fingers, momentarily distracted from his bottle.

"I will. I certainly will. Though don't ever ask me to baby sit."


	17. If Only (April 19th-22nd, 2007)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Where there is bonding up the wazoo in the form of drinking, cookies, music and mutual hate, Harry likes his 'b' and 'm' sounds, and Taylor Hanson is sexy, sexy, sexy. And looks good in his trousers, apparently.

"Okay, so I've got my handy and my charger and you'll be able to get in touch with me at all times," James assured Lily, and it was quite likely that he was more worried about leaving her for a few days than she was about being left. "I just have tomorrow with the event, the after party that evening, and then a few things to wrap up the following morning. You’ll call if you need anything, right? And every so often just because I'll miss the sound of your voice? You can hold the phone up to Harry's ear, too, so he can hear his daddy's voice."

Lily was trying not to look amused as James blathered on, smiling at him with bemusement. "James, darling, I'll be fine," she assured him for the millionth time. "You've no reason to worry. Now kiss me and get on your way before you hit bad traffic. Besides, Sirius looks as though he's getting impatient."

James cast a look over his shoulder. Sirius was sitting in the car with his feet up on the dashboard making faces at James and Lily. "Yeah, all right. Okay. Just, this is the first time, you know. That I'll be away from you and Harry, that is. But okay. It's only a few days in London. That's all. I'm going to go now, then. I love you, Lils. I love you so, so, so much. And I love you too, my little man. Be good for Mummy and Nana and Papa while Daddy is gone!"

"Blur moo!" Harry gurgled, drooling all over himself.

"I love you too, James," Lily said, and pulled him down by the shirtcollars for a kiss.

James kissed her back, and even went so far as to step forward, lengthening the kiss just a little when she started to pull away. He had Harry in his arms, however, and he stepped back after a long moment and readjusted the kid to hold him out to Lily. "See you both soon. Cheers!"

At that, James pecked her on the cheek once more, quickly, and then turned and made himself walk to the car. He might be being a little ridiculous, after all, and he wouldn't let himself go back for a second goodbye. Sirius was probably ready to throttle him as it was.

"Okay. Ready to go mate?" James asked brightly as he climbed into the driver's seat.

"No, not at all," Sirius answered sarcastically, rolling his eyes. "Lets just sit here and stare at Evans and Harry for another week, yeah?"

James paused midway through blowing a goodbye kiss out the window and waving to say, "All right, I might've deserved that. Point taken."

"So we're going then?" Sirius questioned, reaching for his seatbelt.

"Yeah, we're going," James said, grinning and starting the car, peeling out of the driveway. Sure, he drove a station wagon (it was a nice one, though, and he'd bought it because it was a sensible family car, _not_ because he was a grandma, like Sirius seemed to think), but he could still have fun. "Bloke's weekend out. It'll be cool. There are all sorts of celebrities attending."

"We could've had a go of it and took the bike," Sirius said, vaguely. "Not that I mind spending time with you, Grandma. You always give me your spare change after all."

"Shut it, mate. This is one wicked machine," James said solemnly. "We can party it up in here. I'll even let you eat, as long as you try to keep the crumbs off the upholstery."

"Har har," Sirius replied, grinning. "When did you get old, anyhow? Whatever happened to the bloke who tried to wallpaper the walls at school with his own sweaty socks, hmm?"

"He got married and had a baby," James said practically. "Look, mate, just because I've grown up a little, doesn't mean I'm not still Prongs, you know? That's what this trip is about. I may be Mr. Responsible Dad now, but I've still got to have a little fun with my best mate."

"If you're Mr. Responsible then I'm a transport truck," Sirius teased, grinning.

"Sod off," James laughed. "Hey, put on some driving music. Oh, and do you want me to pick anything up before we head out of town?"

"Nah," Sirius answered and yawned. "Figured we'd eat on our way. And since your shit bucket is older than my own grandmother, I made us a mix tape. Aren't I classy?"

"This is a 2002, you prat," James snorted. "You better have brought CDs."

"Why's it matter? Your car has a cassette deck," Sirius said. "But if you're going to be a pussy about it, I've got some Hanson with me."

"Fuck off," James snickered. "Put in the cassette. God, who the fuck listens to tapes anymore, anyway?"

"It'll make you feel nostalgic," Sirius insisted, sliding his tape into the player. "Where's your sense of fun, James? You're such a dad now."

"I’m not _just_ a dad," James insisted. "Look, I'll even let you turn the volume up past eight."

***

Sirius blinked, looking around. "Wait. So... You _work_ with these people?" he asked, scratching his head.

"Some of them. Most of the people actually here are people I work _for_ , not with," James said. "Only a couple of us come to the event, and most of these people are performers and the guests of. See, that little one over there is 'Lady Sovereign'."

"And do they even know who you are, most of them?" Sirius questioned, unbuttoning the top few buttons on his shirt collar. He felt so stuffy and wasn't used to dressing up.

"Nah, not a clue," James said with a grin, ruffling his hair. "They'll pretend they do, sometimes, but most of them haven't met me before today. I'm still sort of just a gopher. C'mon, let's get some drinks."

"Fine enough," Sirius answered cheerfully as they headed toward the bar. Glancing sidelong at the people they passed, Sirius commented, "Prongs, that bird over there just winked at me."

"Yeah, it's a bit of a free for all because there's no press here," James quipped, looking over his shoulder to see who Sirius was talking about. "She's cute. I think she's one of the back-up dancers."

Sirius shrugged. "She's all right."

James snickered. He could see the guilt on Sirius' face. "You know, I don't think you can tease me for being whipped. You're way bloody worse than I am, mate." The bartender appeared in front of the two of them then, and James called out, "Cranberry and vodka, please! What do you want, mate? A pint?"

"Sounds good," Sirius muttered, his face red. The back-up dancer was still making eyes at him, and Sirius leaned against the bar, scratching his chin. "What happened to me? Three years ago I'd already be shagging her."

"You're in _looooove_ ," James teased, then nodded at the bartender, who he assumed heard his pint comment. "I can't claim any big transformation. You know how I've always been. Lily this, Lily that. Just because neither of us'll be getting laid tonight, doesn't mean we can't still have fun, though."

Sirius laughed. "Relationships are the most fucked up things, aren't they? At any rate I plan to get properly smashed because I can't actually remember the last time I was. Which is ridiculous for a bartender."

"Cheers to that!" the bartender said with a laugh as he plonked their drinks down on the counter in front of them.

"Cheers!" James laughed and pushed a few drink coupons and a tip across the counter. Sturgis had arranged for them, same as he'd arranged for the hotel. James loved his job. Turning to Sirius, he said, "I've got drinks tonight, by the by."

"That's good news because I don't have much coin with me," Sirius said, taking his pint in his hand. "So what do we do now, exactly? Mingle?"

"Exactly. Mingle and pretend we know people," James said and then turned, choosing someone from the crowd at random. "Hey mate! Great day today, wasn't it? How are you?"

***

Sirius was laughing as though he'd never heard anything funnier in his life, although he wasn't completely sure what he was laughing at. All he knew was that he'd probably had one pint too many at the party, and as he stumbled out of the limo with James and the crew they'd hooked up with, he was pretty sure that the bird with the pink hat grabbed his arse.

She had, and James and seen, and he wiped tears of laughter from his eyes, grinned at her, and swatted her hand away. "Oi! You'll get him in trouble with the wife, which will in turn get me in trouble with my wife. None of that!"

"You're not both bloody married," chortled a big black fellow who had introduced himself as 'Bennet Swain, but you can call me Big'. In response, James held up his hand to show his wedding band.

"Well where's his then?" the girl in the pink hat (Monica? Maria? Marilyn?) asked.

James tried on a solemn face, threw his arm around Sirius' shoulders, and patted Sirius' chest with one hand. "It's in there. It is in his _heart_."

She stared for a moment before giggling and saying, "Well, that can't be medically sound," and setting them all off laughing again.

"I don't think 's legal for me to get married, ishit Jamie?" Sirius slurred, leaning on James and grinning.

"Actually, maybe it is. Civil union, or something," James said, running a hand through his hair and thinking. Realizing their new friends didn't know, James leaned forward, inadvertantly pulling Sirius with him by the arm still around Sirius' neck. "Pads is a poofter. Or, half of one, but he's shacked up with a bloke."

"I used ta shag birds," Sirius announced grandly, trying to throw his arms out with bravado, and instead he tripped and nearly pulled James to the ground with him. "Whoops! Sorry Prongsy."

"It's a shame you stopped, Sirius," the girl in the pink hat said as walked by him, before kneeling down to touch his face slightly. "You're far too pretty to bother yourself with the same sex."

"Hang on, but didn't you say he had a wife?" Big asked with a wide grin. They were practically still kids, these two, and the one had definitely had too much to drink, but they were fun.

"Oh, that's a joke. We tease Remus about being a girl," James said, voice just a little slurred. "And Sirius isn't wasting anything. Remus certainly appreciates the pretty. They have sex a _lot_."

Big burst out laughing and reached down to pull Sirius to his feet. "Come on, let's go inside."

James started heading for the end of the line, but then turned and followed Big towards the doors. He waved at the bouncers, indicated to the rest of his little group, and walked in.

James grinned at Sirius. "He's a VIP, and at a club like this, too. He must be _loaded_."

"Money, money, money by the pound!" Sirius sang gleefully, grinning. Then, confused, he asked, "Where the fuck are weeesh Jamie?"

"We're at Secrets," James whispered as they stepped through the second set of doors and into a packed club. Big was making his way to the stairs, though, and up to the lounge area that overlooked the dance floor, so James followed. "Sturge is gonna be so jealous."

"Sturrrrrrrgis talks too much," Sirius commented with a giggle. "The music is real loud!"

"This is totally the universal office wet dream!" James quipped as he sat next to Big on a bright blue sofa in a back nook of the club, half concealed by fancy draping curtain things. "All the after after parties for the big events sort of end up here, and it's invite only, and everyone wants to go, and I'm here!"

"Down boy," Big said with a grin.

A scantily clad waitress aproached then, and Big ordered everyone another drink. The pink hat lady was on Big's other side from James, and Sirius was on James' right, and James was still smiling and looking around with wide eyes.

Wide eyes that got even wider after a moment.

"Hey, Pads, is that... No, it can't be," James said, shaking his head. "That bloke over there looks sort of like Peter."

"Bitty Petey Petty-grew?" Sirius asked, smiling broadly and looking in the general direction James was looking in. "If Pete's here I think I'll eat my own nads."

"Can you see him? It looks so much like him! Just... with nicer clothes. And... slutty women hanging off of him. It's like... alternate universe Peter," James continued. "Big, we'll be right back."

"Sure," Big said, but he was engrossed in a conversation with a tall, skinny fellow who'd appeared out of nowhere. Or, at least James hadn't noticed him.

Getting to his feet, James pulled Sirius with him and started towards Possibly Peter. "Come on, we'll just get closer and see if it's still him. It's probably a trick of the flashing lights and shit."

"I'd hope so," Sirius said, stumbling along behind James. "I don't think sluts would hangsh off of Pete if they were paid."

The closer they got, the surer James was that it _was_ Pete. He looked exactly like him. Exactly. Except there was just something off. Besides the clothes and the girls, there was just... He was confident. He looked happy and comfortable. Maybe it wasn't the same sort of easy, cocky confidence that James and Sirius had, but it was there. All James could do was stand and stare.

"It's him," he said dully to Sirius. "That's Peter. What the hell is he _doing_ here?"

"Are yoush sure?" Sirius asked, narrowing his eyes. He couldn't tell, because he was seeing about four of everyone in front of them.

"Yeah, I'm sure. Come on, let's go figure out what's going on," James said, starting towards their friend and pulling Sirius with him. "Peter! Hey, Petey old boy! What the fuck, mate?"

The smile fell off of Peter's face as he spotted James and (a rather drunk looking) Sirius coming toward him. "Who's that Petey?" a scantily clad woman with enormous breasts asked.

"Petesh!" Sirius smiled, and hopped forward wobbly, pulling Peter into a tight hug. "What're you doing here with hot people?"

Peter didn't say anything for a moment. He just stared at them, and James blinked and waved a hand in front of his face. Pete flinched and stepped away from them, and said, "I, um, I, I, I'm working. I'm h-here with w-work."

"I thought you worked in an office or something. How is hanging out at Secrets a work thing?" James asked, watching with grotesque fascination as one of the women at Peter's side licked his ear and whispered something James couldn't hear. For a second, there was a flash of the confident Peter James had seen a minute ago, and Pete pushed her away.

"Go get me a drink, Jezebel. And call Preston to come," Peter said, and James couldn't quite stop his eyebrows from raising.

The woman--Jezebel--pouted at Peter for a moment, but then just left to comply.

"Okay, who are you, and what have you done with Pete?" James demanded with a girn. "Mate? Mate! You're a big shot! So what are you doing here? What kind of work, I mean? Are you a pimp? You can tell me if you are."

Sirius laughed uncontrollably and said, "Peter'sh a Pimp! Ha!"

Peter didn't want to deal with them, he really didn't. It was bad enough facing them when he had to go back to Salcombe, and usally he tried to avoid them even when he did. "N-no, not a p-pimp," he said, cursing himself. He hardly talked with his stutter anymore. "A-and I could ask y-you the s-same. What y-you're doing here. I-I mean."

"Oh, I _was_ working--some big charity do that my company was advertising for--and now I'm not. Now I'm partying with Big and a bird in a pink hat," James said.

Peter's eyes widened and he asked, "You're h-here with Big and Miranda? W-wow." So, now that James explained, did that mean Pete had to too? He hated this, feeling like this. They were just watching him with their stupid smiles like, oh, wow, how shocking it is that Petey isn't retarded. He wished they'd never spotted him, because he could already feel how Ambrosia, the girl on his other arm, was watching them, leaning towards them. Like even she knew they were better than him. He tugged her closer to his side and said, "I'm here n-networking. For my b-boss. But I h-have to g-go. I work in the morning."

Sirius pouted. "Aw, but we nevershee you! Stay and hash a drink with your old matesh!" He laughed again at the sound of himself, and said to James, "I sound like I'm eatin'!"

"You're an idiot, you idiot. And come on, Petey! We promise not to tell the Wormtail story!" James said, grinning and making a face at Ambrosia. She laughed.

"I c-can't. Jezebel already c-called our driver," Peter said, just as Jezebel returned to his side. "S-sorry. But work c-comes first. A-a-an-and you'll have more fun with Big and Miranda a-anyway." Big was the vice president of his Father's company, Swain Enterprises. He was worth about 28 million pounds and his family owned practically half the commercial real estate in London Proper. Bellatrix had been trying to get on his good side for months after Riddle pissed him off with some stupid crack about his clothes. Peter knew he'd just botch it up if he spoke to the man, and he could pretend that was reason enough for leaving. He wasn't hiding from his friends.

"Sodding party poopersh!" Sirius said.

"Well, we could stay, couldn't we, Mr. Pettigrew?" Ambrosia asked, eyeing Sirius appreciatively.

Peter turned to look at her, eyes wide, and Jezebel swore under her breath. What about 'keep Peter Pettigrew happy' didn't Ambrosia get? Honestly. Jezebel reached over and pinched the girl's arm behind Peter's back, all the while smiling brightly and melting into Peter's side.

"She's drunk and stupid," Jezebel whispered. "Let's drop her off and you and me go back to my place. I don't like your friends."

"Hey you stupid bint," Sirius started frowning. "You don't fucking knowsh us."

"Relax," James said, putting a hand on Sirius' arm. "He's going to get laid, and mates don't get in the way of that. Call us sometime though, yeah? We never hear from you anymore."

"S-sure, yeah. Of c-course," Peter said and began heading for the stairs down to the main floor, pushing Ambrosia away and just relieved to get away from James and Sirius. "Bye!"

"That was weird," Sirius said.

"Yeah," James said, watching Pete walk down the stairs. "Really bloody weird."

"You'd think he would've told ush he was fucking some bird," Sirius said.

"You'd think he would've told us his job included going to sweet clubs with hot birds and 'networking'. What the fuck is networking, anyway?" James asked.

Sirius shrugged. "I dunno. Meeting hot birds?"

James snorted. "Yeah, I guess so. Never would've thought Pete had it in him, though. Come on, let's go get our drinks from Big."

***

"Too bad for the running man, 'cause he waits too long so he can't go back again," Lily sang, dancing from the closet to the bed with trousers in her hands. "Too bad for the running man, 'cause I'm right here waiting to make that girl forget! Too bad for the running man! Good-bye!"

Remus laughed and tossed the freshly cleaned socks at her that he'd just been rolling into pairs. "You're just as ridiculous as Sirius is."

Lily grinned unabashedly, still shaking her hips as Zac Hanson kept singing on the stereo. "I blame you, buying me tickets," she said, and Harry giggled and gurled from his playpen in the corner, bouncing up and down to the music. "James is going to be so broken-hearted when his son follows Hanson on tour rather than playing footie."

"Oh, you already know Harry's a fairy, then?" Remus said, but he was just trying to wind Lily up.

Lily stuck out her tongue. "You'd know, wouldn't you?"

Laughing, Remus reached out and pulled the trousers out of her suitcase and folded them. "I most certainly would. And you can't just throw things in however you please. I don't care how excited you are. Do you want to meet Taylor Hanson with wrinkled trousers on?"

Lily snorted. "As though Taylor Hanson will give a rip about the state of my trousers, Remus."

"You are going to have so much fun, Lily," Remus said brightly. "And you know, if you're nice to Sirius, he'll be nice to you too. I lectured him before he left."

Rolling her eyes as 'Running Man' stopped, Lily ran over to the stereo and skipped ahead to the twelfth track. "I'm _always_ nice to Sirius," she said, and 'Something Going Round' started playing.

"You are not," Remus said. "You're lovely and wonderful, but of all the people in the world, it is common knowledge that Sirius is not one of your favourite. He's willing to be nice if you are. It's just a day and a half. You'll enjoy the concert much more if you're not fighting through it."

"I like Sirius," Lily countered. "In fact, one might even say that I love him like a brother. But as a brother that grates my nerves."

"Well, you ought to. He's sort of your brother-in-law. He and James might as well be brothers," Remus said. "But honestly, you just need to learn to leave each other alone. You both pick at one another. It's ridiculous." A timer dinged and Remus, grinning, scooped Harry up out of the playpen and headed for the kitchen. "Mummy and Uncle Remy made cookies, Harry, and they're finished! Yum!"

Harry squealed and clapped in Remus' arms. "Moo bas bum!" he babbled happily, and Lily followed behind the two of them.

"Well. I only give as much as I get you know," she said. "I've never been the sort to take comments like, 'Wow, Evans, your arse looks _huge_ in that skirt!' lying down."

"He is _such_ a cad," Remus said, rolling his eyes. "Your arse never looks huge. You have a very nice, petite arse. And I'm allowed to say so because you're still my best girl. Don't take any crap from Sirius, to be sure, but I _have_ Lily quirked an eyebrow. "And you really think he'll listen to either of you? It is Sirius we're talking about after all."

"Fine. If you're both determined to be difficult, than I hope you have a perfectly wretched time," Remus said, rolling his eyes as he shifted Harry to one hip and opened the oven to check if the cookies were ready to come out.

"Mmm, those smell delightful," Lily said, and made a face at Harry. "Don't they smell wonderful, sweetums? Don't Mummy and Uncle Remy make lovely cookies?"

Harry squealed particularly loud and yelled, "Boo mum!"

"Oh did you hear that, Remus? He said Mum!" Lily exclaimed, clapping her hands together.

Remus laughed and bounced Harry a little on his hip. "Harry, can you say Mum again? Mum?"

"Mummm um mah! Num ums!" Harry said, and Remus laughed.

"The cookies can come out, if you want to grab them, Lily, but you can't have any yet Harry," Remus said, smoothing Harry's hair back as he spoke to the little boy. "They're too hot. They'll burn you. Hot, hot, ouch! ...He really does have a lot of hair for his age, doesn't he?"

"He has a lot of everything for his age," Lily said. "Hair, brains... He'll be talking full sentences soon enough, you watch." Grabbing an oven mitt off of the stove, Lily reached into the oven for the cookie tray.

"He's such a charmer, isn't he? He's just such a happy baby," Remus said. "I mean, he hardly ever cries."

"He's got nothing to cry about," Lily said, smiling, setting the hot tray on the stovetop. "Did I tell you Dorcas has been coming to see me after school?"

"No, really?" Remus asked. "What about? The whole pregnancy thing, I assume?"

Lily nodded. "She hasn't said as much but she quite obviously petrified. Not surprisingly, the poor thing. She's not ready to be somebody's mum."

"What do you think? Do you think they're crazy to be keeping it?" Remus asked. "Not that it's our place to pass judgement, of course. Just... curious what you think."

"I used to think that Edgar Bones could handle anything," Lily answered. "Then he hooked up with Dorcas and I was pretty sure he'd lost his marbles because that girl was a hellion. She's better now, but not to the point where I think she's able to be a mum. I think Ed could handle Dor, or be a dad. I don't know if he can do both."

"Meaning what? You think they'll either split up or give the kid up?" Remus asked, furrowing his brows thoughtfully as Harry quite happily chewed on his shirt collar.

"No. I just think he's a brave, brave man," Lily said with a shrug. "What about you? What do you think?"

"I don't know. I feel bad for their kid. And for them, really. It's just such a hard situation," Remus said. "And he wants to go to college so badly... I really hope he doesn't give that up in light of all of this."

Lily shook her head. "He won't. I was talking to him the other day... Apparently he had to talk Dorcas into staying in high school. She wanted to move to London and apprentice Mad-Eye."

"Good lord," Remus said, rolling his eyes. "I bet you he would, too. He never graduated from high school either."

"Of course he would," Lily said. "Thankfully Ed has more sense than that and convinced her to stay in. You _know_ what a lot of it was though... for all her bravado, Dorcas doesn't want to be judged." made him promise to be nice if you'll be nice. And I'm sure James has done the same."

Lily quirked an eyebrow. "And you really think he'll listen to either of you? It is Sirius we're talking about after all."

"Fine. If you're both determined to be difficult, than I hope you have a perfectly wretched time," Remus said, rolling his eyes as he shifted Harry to one hip and opened the oven to check if the cookies were ready to come out.

"Mmm, those smell delightful," Lily said, and made a face at Harry. "Don't they smell wonderful, sweetums? Don't Mummy and Uncle Remy make lovely cookies?"

Harry squealed particularly loud and yelled, "Boo mum!"

"Oh did you hear that, Remus? He said Mum!" Lily exclaimed, clapping her hands together.

Remus laughed and bounced Harry a little on his hip. "Harry, can you say Mum again? Mum?"

"Mummm um mah! Num ums!" Harry said, and Remus laughed.

"The cookies can come out, if you want to grab them, Lily, but you can't have any yet Harry," Remus said, smoothing Harry's hair back as he spoke to the little boy. "They're too hot. They'll burn you. Hot, hot, ouch! ...He really does have a lot of hair for his age, doesn't he?"

"He has a lot of everything for his age," Lily said. "Hair, brains... He'll be talking full sentences soon enough, you watch." Grabbing an oven mitt off of the stove, Lily reached into the oven for the cookie tray.

"He's such a charmer, isn't he? He's just such a happy baby," Remus said. "I mean, he hardly ever cries."

"He's got nothing to cry about," Lily said, smiling, setting the hot tray on the stovetop. "Did I tell you Dorcas has been coming to see me after school?"

"No, really?" Remus asked. "What about? The whole pregnancy thing, I assume?"

Lily nodded. "She hasn't said as much but she quite obviously petrified. Not surprisingly, the poor thing. She's not ready to be somebody's mum."

"What do you think? Do you think they're crazy to be keeping it?" Remus asked. "Not that it's our place to pass judgement, of course. Just... curious what you think."

"I used to think that Edgar Bones could handle anything," Lily answered. "Then he hooked up with Dorcas and I was pretty sure he'd lost his marbles because that girl was a hellion. She's better now, but not to the point where I think she's able to be a mum. I think Ed could handle Dor, or be a dad. I don't know if he can do both."

"Meaning what? You think they'll either split up or give the kid up?" Remus asked, furrowing his brows thoughtfully as Harry quite happily chewed on his shirt collar.

"No. I just think he's a brave, brave man," Lily said with a shrug. "What about you? What do you think?"

"I don't know. I feel bad for their kid. And for them, really. It's just such a hard situation," Remus said. "And he wants to go to college so badly... I really hope he doesn't give that up in light of all of this."

Lily shook her head. "He won't. I was talking to him the other day... Apparently he had to talk Dorcas into staying in high school. She wanted to move to London and apprentice Mad-Eye."

"Good lord," Remus said, rolling his eyes. "I bet you he would, too. He never graduated from high school either."

"Of course he would," Lily said. "Thankfully Ed has more sense than that and convinced her to stay in. You know what a lot of it was though... for all her bravado, Dorcas doesn't want to be judged."

"I can understand that, though," Remus said softly. "I mean, all her life, look what sort of a home she grew up in. People think she had it so easy with rich, well to do parents. Sirius had rich, well to do parents too, and both of them were miserable. I just mean that people make so many assumptions. It won't be easy for Dorcas."

"Oh I know that, but she has to put the baby first now that they've decided to keep it, and Mad-Eye Moody or no, she's not going to get much out of life without her high school diploma," Lily said. "But she comes over and questions me on everything. I feel as though I'm being evaluated."

"How so?" Remus asked. "What sort of questions does she ask?"

"'What's he laughing at?', 'How do you know what he wants when he cries?', 'Why did you do that?', 'Aren't you supposed to check the milk temperature on your wrist or something?'" Lily reached in one of the drawers for a spatula. "Anything and everything she can ask, she does ask."

"Well, at least she's trying to prepare herself," Remus said diplomatically, though he was smiling a little. Dorcas was a lot like Sirius in some respects, and he could imagine she got on Lily's nerves after a while. "It isn't as though she can go to her mother."

"True enough, and I don't mind helping her," Lily said. "But like everything else she does, Dorcas has some grand ideas about how she's going to raise her child. Would you believe she convinced Edgar to give it the middle name 'Rocket'?"

Remus blinked and then started laughing. "What do you think, Harry? Harry Rocket Potter? Has a nice ring. We could change yours to match."

Lily smiled. "I think Harry James is just lovely, thank you," she said. "She was here yesterday afternoon with her shirt off, and every ten minutes she was poking the little bit of a bump she does have and asking me if she was going to get really fat."

"You just know she's been doing that to Edgar too," Remus said with a mischievous look in his eye. "Poor fellow probably can't concentrate at all."

"He's got his hands full, that much is certain," Lily agreed. "It'll be interesting to see what happens when she really _does_ get fat."

"Do you know if they've told Edgar's parents yet?" Remus asked.

"Yeah, they finally did. He would've told them right away of course, but she held off," Lily said. "They were surprised, but you know what Ed's folks are like. Didn't even yell at them."

"Oh, I would've been very surprised if they did," Remus said. "Do you know how they took it? I mean, did Dorcas tell you what sort of reaction they had?"

"I think they were a little dissipointed in Edgar," Lily said. "They asked if Ed and Dor were planning on getting married when she's done school and apparently Dorcas answered yes to that one. They were really, really surprised. Going to help them find an apartment, though."

"They don't want them staying in the basement?" Remus asked, shocked. "I would've assumed they'd have them stay."

Lily shook her head. "Edgar is just being ridiculous, that's all that's about. He doesn't want to put his parents out. Dor's been trying to talk him out of it, and so have I, but you know how stubborn he can be sometimes."

"Indeed," Remus said. "Working, going to school, shopping, cooking, cleaning, and paying rent for the first time are all tough enough, without throwing a baby into the mix. They're going to need all the help they can get. At the most, I'd suggest they pay his parents a little rent, perhaps." After a moment, Remus asked, "Do you have any idea if _Dorcas_ ' parents know yet?"

"Unless it's gotten to them somehow, I don't think so," Lily said. "I don't know what they're going to do once they find out."

"Me neither," Remus said. They'd either react very well, or very badly, he thought. And considering past examples, it was probably leaning towards very badly. Of course, there was always the possibility they wouldn't react at all in order to save face. Reaching out and picking up one of the cookies, Remus took a bite and winced. "Still hot. Ow. Very tasty though."

Harry, tired of being ignored while Mummy and Uncle Remus gossiped, made a loud squealing noise right in Remus' ear that quite clearly suggested to his uncle that Harry wanted to be played with.

"Okay, okay," Remus said, putting the remainder of his cookie down and then spinning around with Harry held tightly in his arms. Harry giggled his approval as soon as Remus stopped and clapped his little hands together. Remus did it once more and then turned to face Lily. "You're going to drop him off at Rachel and Leonard's on your way out of town, right?"

Before Lily had a chance to reply, there was a knock at the door.

"Yes, unless you'd like to take him over," Lily said, heading toward the door. "I'm sure he'd enjoy a day with Uncle Remus. Oh, Dorcas, hello! School out already?"

"It must be later than we thought. You'd better get going soon," Remus said. "Hello Dorcas. We were just talking about you."

"Hi," Dorcas said, dropping her backpack in the entry. "Talking about me how?"

"Suppose it is, bugger," Lily said, checking her watch. "And I haven't finished packing yet."

"Lily just told me you visited her every so often," Remus said in response to Dorcas. "And grab a cookie if you like. You can chat with us in the bedroom while we get Lily packed up. She's going away to a Hanson concert in London today."

***

"Oi, I'm leaving, you lazy arse!" James said loudly. Sirius was still a lump under the covers, but James had been up working all morning. "You be nice to Lily this weekend. You promise?"

Sirius rolled over and peered over the covers. "I'll be nice if she is!"

"Just be nice anyway," James ordered. "Tell her I miss her, and tell her to call me when she gets here so I know she made it okay and no crazies kidnapped her on the train."

"Yeah, yeah," Sirius mumbled. "Don't drive into a ditch on your way back."

"She gets into King's Cross at 18:45," James continued as if Sirius hadn't spoken, reading the time off of a note he'd left himself in his cell phone. "Are you going to meet her, or just wait here for her?"

"Do you want me to meet her?" Sirius asked, knowing what the answer would be, but hoping for the opposite all the same.

"If you don't mind?" James said hopefully. "Just, she's so bloody gorgeous, and some of those taxi drivers are total criminals."

"Yeah, yeah, fine, I'll meet her then," Sirius answered. "Now get lost so I can sleep for four more hours."

"All right, all right," James said. "Thanks mate. It was a blast! Enjoy the concert."

"Thanks for all the drinks!" Sirius called back.

"Not a problem," James called out as he dragged his suitcase out the door. "See you in a few days!"

***

"Sirius!" Lily called, stepping off of the train, tugging her suitcase off the steps behind her. "Over here!"

Spotting her, Sirius took his time sauntering over, grinning all the while. He took her suitcase for her and said, "So James and Remus told me I had to be nice to you."

"So they've both said," Lily replied, smiling wryly. "Are you going to listen to them or are you going to call me a fat arse all the while we're here?"

"They just don't understand the delicate balance we maintain, Evans," Sirius answered, wrapping an arm around her shoulders. "I say we come back alive and surprise the fuck out of both of them."

Lily laughed. "Deal," she said. "Now, I'm starved. Tell me you haven't eaten?"

***

"Remus!" James said as soon as Remus answered his buzz. "Let me up, I'm bored. And I've brought curry."

"Hello James," Remus said, completely unsurprised, and held the button to let his friend into the building. It was only short moments later when James burst into the apartment (without knocking), food under one arm and DVDs in the other.

"I thought we might catch up a bit. It's been ages, and to be honest, I don't know what to do with myself without Lily and Harry. Mum and Dad kept him for the night."

"You're lucky I've not eaten. What movies did you bring?" Remus asked with great trepidation. He and James had _very_ different taste.

"Er, well. Actually. They're Lily's Hanson DVDs," James said. "I thought we might watch them, just to see what a Hanson concert is like, you know?"

"We don't like Hanson, remember?" Remus reminded James, though he took the movies and began flipping through.

"Well, you just know they're both going to be groaning over Taylor all night," James said. "I thought it might make us feel better to make disparaging comments."

"I was trying not to think about it. He does have very nice hair, doesn't he? It's even nicer than Fabian's," Remus sighed. "Oh, don't tell Sirius I said that."

"I won't, so long as you don't tell _anyone_ we watched Hanson."

"Deal."

***

"Oh, I dunno," Sirius said before stuffing a few more fries in his mouth. They were sitting on a street bench eating fish and chips, and Lily and Sirius were debating whether or not Hanson's new album was better than This Time Around. "I mean, it's stronger, just in a different way, you know? But nothing beats bloody 'Georgia'."

"I wonder which wife it's about?" Lily questioned idly. "Taylor sings, but the lyrics really put me in mind of Zac and Kate's relationship."

Sirius shrugged. "Same. But you never know with that lot."

"No, definitely not," Lily agreed, taking a bite of a fry. "I really hope they sing 'If Only' at the concert. I really love that song."

"You know, I always meant to ask... how'd you convince James to let you have it played at the wedding?" Sirius asked. "Not that I didn't appreciate it, mind, as Hanson adds necessary class to any affair, but he was dead set against it, wasn't he?"

Lily smirked. "I explained that it was playing on the stereo the first time we shagged," she told Sirius lewdly, waggling her eyebrows. "And I'm sure, as his surrogate brother and all, you know every little detail."

Sirius rolled his eyes, but he was smiling. "Funny thing, James can still describe what colour your knickers were, but I bet you if you asked him to sing 'If Only', he'd go off with 'Mmmbop'."

"No doubt," Lily laughed. "His Hanson education is rather limited, although I've tried to get him to watch Underneath Acoustic Live a million times because you know how much he loves Crosby Stills Nash and Young. Hey, you know what we should do tonight?"

"What?" Sirius asked thickly, his mouthful of fish.

"Find a place that has karaoke," Lily suggested with a grin. "We could duet on 'Mmmbop'."

They were only three songs into Underneath Acoustic Live, but James was pretty sure he was in hell. Not that it was all that bad. It was actually pretty good, really. Music wise, that was. But it was _hell_. James had just electronically met the man his wife would leave him for.

"Bugger," James said sullenly and slouched down on the couch a little more. "Bugger and fuck and shit."

"Yes," Remus agreed. "It's about that, isn't it. They're good. He's... bloody gorgeous. Why did I buy the tickets again? Why, Prongs?"

"Because you never did know how to just accept being happy, that's why," James said. "You want Sirius to leave you, obviously. And you must want Lily to leave me. How could you _do_ that to Harry?"

Remus blinked, and then tried a smile. "We're being dramatic. Besides, he's married. It's fine. We're fine. He's totally off the market."

They lapsed into miserable silence again, and watched the television screen in slack-jawed awe.

After a beat Remus said, "You do realize we're both being completely pathetic, right? Totally pathetic."

"Yeah," James sighed and took a sip of a beer he'd found in the fridge. He figured that in some obscure way, Sirius owed him so he drank it, even though he didn't really like beer. "You want to go down to Horrace's for a bit? Have a couple drinks and play some pool or summat?"

"Oh, sure," Remus dead panned, giving James a look. "You could meet Rita. She's probably there. She's the reporter that wants in Sirius' pants _really_ badly. You sure know how to cheer me up."

"Well, we can't just stay in and mope and watch Taylor's hair swish and arse shake on the telly all night. I don't know if my ego could recover from something like that," James said, sitting up and stretching. "One video was enough. Let's... play something."

"Like what?" Remus asked.

"What have you got?"

Sighing, Remus hoisted himself to his feet and walked to the closet where they kept their games, and a whole bunch of other random rubbish. "Scrabble, Monopoly, Risk, Clue, or plain old cards."

"Clue," James said. "I want to be Colonel Mustard."

"That isn't how Clue works. You don't get to _be_ anyone..."

"Shut up," James said with a grin. "We're playing character Clue. You can be one of the girls because you are a nancy boy."

"You know, I'm not sure that staying in and playing board games on a Saturday night is any _less_ pathetic than..."

"Quiet, Miss Scarlet! I want to play Clue!"

***

Lily clapped along cheerfully as Sirius swivelled his hips to Bob Seger and belted out 'Night Moves' like there was no tomorrow. Some girls their age had some into the bar and were up next to him dancing along and doing their best to make him want them, and Lily couldn't help but wonder what was funnier: Sirius' performance, or the uselessness of what the bints were doing.

"Why hello there," a male voice said above Lily, and she looked up into the face of a tall, curly-haired blond man. He was smiling at her and she smiled back slightly and nodded. "I'm Jerry," he continued, ignoring her hesitation and sliding into Sirius' seat across from her. "Who might you be?"

Lily didn't like him already. "Lily Potter," she answered. " _Mrs_. Lily Potter, actually," she added, and showed him her left ring finger.

"Strange for a married woman to be out some bar at all hours, hmm?" Jerry said, flashing her a toothy grin. "Mr. Potter not up to satisfying his wife?"

Lily frowned. "I'm on holiday."

"Without your husband? Tut tut. Need to get away?" Jerry asked. "I could add a little _something_ to your holiday, sweetheart."

"Who's this?" Sirius asked, coming up to the table. Lily hadn't even noticed that the song had ended. "Hitting on my sister-in-law, are you?"

"On holiday with your brother-in-law!" Jerry exclaimed, looking between the two of them, amused. "Well that is _juicy_. Does Mr. Potter know?"

"Bugger off, mate," Sirius said. "She's not interested. And I'd appreciate it if you got out of my seat."

"You going to make me?" Jerry asked, slowly raising his eyebrows. "I'd like to see you try."

"Never mind, Sirius," Lily said, getting up and standing beside him. "Let's just get out of here. It's late anyhow. And you make a lovely Bob Seger, by the way." She squeezed his arm purposely as if to say, 'The bloke's not worth it, you don't need to defend my honour.' Sirius caught her drift and turned them both in the direction of the door.

"What are you, some sort of fairy?" Jerry called at their retreating backs.

"Yes, actually," Sirius answered, and he and Lily exchanged a laugh at Jerry's expense before heading outside.

***

James stretched and then rolled over, landing with a thump on the floor and waking up rather suddenly indeed.

"Ow. Your pull out bed is too small," James complained. "And I don't work today. Do you work today? I don't. Is it weird that I don't know what to do without Lily? Usually I spend all my days off with Lily and Harry."

"No, I don't work," Remus said. "And... generally I stay with Sirius when I'm off of work. So no, I hope it isn't weird. You know, we could go visit Harry today. I mean, Rachel and Leonard would probably be glad to have us."

"Ooh, I bet you Dad would make us French toast for breakfast," James said, stretching. "We could go to the park with Harry after. It looks sunny outside."

"Sounds great," Remus agreed. "Get dressed, it's already after ten."

"After ten? And you're already showered?" James asked, yawning and stumbling towards the bathroom. "What time did you get up, you freak? It's your day off."

***

"NO!" Sirius whined as Lily pulled the blankets off of him and then started tugging at his foot. "I don't want to be in the front that badly! The show isn't until 7:30 you cow!"

"So what?" Lily questioned, unsuccessfully attempting to drag Sirius' arse out of bed. "It's after ten! I'm showered and dressed already and you're clinging to your pillow for dear life. At least lets go eat! Get up!"

"Abuse!" Sirius yelled, struggling against her. "Bring breakfast to me! I don't want to get dressed!"

"I'm not your slave girl, Sirius," Lily said, and headed into the bathroom. "You're going to get up, shower, get dressed, and then we going to go eat."

"Not for another four hours. Watch the telly!" Sirius said. He was so used to working nights that weird sleeping patterns were ingrained into his biological clock.

Lily came out of the bathroom with a cup full of cold water and dumped it on Sirius' head. "Get up you lazy sodding oaf! There's nothing on the telly anyhow!"

Sirius shrieked (like a little girl, embarrasingly enough), and jumped out of bed. "You _wench_ ," he said to a grinning Lily, whose arms were folded across her chest. "Horrid bitch."

"Good morning, darling," Lily answered. "Nice to see you in the land of the living. Now go shower. You smell like stale peanuts."

***

"Mum? Dad! Where's my little man?" James hollered, letting himself into the house. Harry came crawling out of the living room, following James' voice, and James bent and scooped him up, holding him close and blowing a wet raspberry against Harry's neck. "Hello! Hello, you! How was the night at Nana and Papa's? How was it? Did you have fun? Did you get spoiled like a little spoiled thing?"

Harry giggled loudly and put one, sticky baby hand on James' face, a thumb sliding into James' mouth so that James opened up wide and pretended to eat Harry's hand.

"You are such a dad," Remus commented from the doorway, stepping in and shutting it behind him, leaning past James to smile at the couple standing at the entryway to the living room. "Hello Leonard, hello Rachel. How are you today?"

"Wide awake," Rachel answered. "James, have you and Lily been teaching Harry to wake up before dawn when he's at Nana and Papa's?"

"Certainly not. Most of the time Harry is a good little boy and sleeps right until eight, but sometimes he gets fussy and wakes up at seven," James said, grinning at his parents and holding Harry against him with one arm. "What time was he up today?"

"Before six," Leonard said gruffly, but he was smiling. How could he not smile, watching his own grown son holding his little boy like that, with such care and love in his face? And Harry looked so much like James, it was almost enough to make an old man emotional every damn time he saw them together. He was just that proud.

"You little rat!" James gasped, making an exaggerated face at Harry. "You stinking little rat! Well. Why don't you and me and Uncle Remy go to the park today and let Nana and Papa have a nap, since you got them up so early, huh? Sound good? Food first, though. Dad, you want to make us French toast? Please, oh, please?"

"James, it's after eleven," Leonard said. "It's practically lunch time."

"We'll put some eggs on and call it brunch," Rachel said, poking her husband in the side. "Besides, it's adorable to watch James clean Harry up after he's gotten into the syrup."

"Boom!" Harry said at random, and James grinned so wide his dimples got shadows.

"Boom!" James agreed and twirled into the kitchen. "This boy loves his 'b' and 'm' sounds."

Leonard, Rachel, and Remus followed James into the kitchen, all wearing bemused expressions.

"Do you want any help?" Remus asked pleasantly. "I think James is in the Daddy zone."

"I think you're very right," Leonard said, grabbing some eggs from the stove. "Would you make some orange juice? There's some concentrate in the freezer."

***

"You, you're insane," Sirius complained with a mouthful of bacon. "You're going to make me choke!"

"Well, I want to get in line!" Lily admonished, having already finished her sausages, along with two cups of tea. "You know there's likely a host of them already camped out there, and I want a chance at a decent spot on the floor."

Sirius rolled his eyes. "Forcing my food into my mouth is going to send us to the hospital, not the Koko. And besides, it's fucking raining out, Evans."

"I brought an umbrella," Lily reminded him. "It's big. We can share."

"I still want to taste my food, not just inhale it," Sirius said. "I'm not a ruddy vacuum cleaner. Besides, I'm out of bed and dressed. What more do you want from me?"

Lily tutted. "Sirius Black I'm disappointed in you. I'd expected you to be in a state of Hanson induced fangirlism by now."

"I'm not a fangirl," Sirius argued, before taking a sip of his coffee.

"Lies!" Lily teased, eyes dancing. "You probably write Hanson fan fiction about how you're going to turn Taylor gay and run off and live happily ever after! You do, I bet. Hunched over the computer late at night, making Natalie out to be some evil bitch?"

"Oh bugger off," Sirius said. "You're talking about yourself again, Evans. You should have that checked out."

"Sirius write Hanfic, Sirius writes Hanfic," Lily singsonged happily.

Sirius threw a piece of bacon at her.

***

Remus was sitting on the bench, watching James climb all over the jungle gym with Harry in his arms. Grinning, Remus watched as James went down the slide one more time. "Remus, come on. Come on the seesaw with us!"

Getting up, Remus met them halfway and elbowed James. "You're having so much fun just playing, aren't you? You are such a big kid."

"Oh, shut up. Like you aren't having fun," James said, and settled on the seesaw with Harry nestled safely in James' lap, James' arm firmly around Harry. "What do you think Lily and Sirius are doing right now?"

"Probably waiting in line. It's almost two, after all. You know they'll want to be on the floor," Remus said. "I wonder if it's as sunny in London as it is here. It tends to be rather smoggy, you know."

***

"I'm coooooooold," Sirius whined. "And I'm weeeeeeeeet. You're umbrella is completely useless."

"You're completely useless," Lily retorted. "Only four more hours until they let us in."

"Oh is that all?" Sirius asked sarcastically. "Well thank goodness for that. Buggering shit. Least they could've set up a canopy of some sort."

"We should've brought a tent," Lily admonished. "You should've thought of bringing a tent, Sirius."

"I never claimed to be the brains of this operation, Evans," Sirius said back, wondering if Hanson was worth how cold the metal of his nipple piercing felt against his skin right now. "Aren't you cold?"

"Freezing," Lily replied. "But they're worth it."

***

Lily had called just before the doors had opened. That was an hour and a half ago. The concert was in full swing, and this time, James and Remus _were_ at a pub.

Seated at a booth in the back corner of Horrace's Pub (thank goodness Rita wasn't around), James, Remus, Edgar, and Dorcas were munching on chips and sipping drinks. (Non-alcoholic for Dorcas and, at Dor's insistance, Edgar too.)

"But he's like fucking sex poured into jeans," Dorcas laughed. "I looked up pictures of him after Ed told me Sirius had an obsession. It was too fucking funny not to. He's a little fucking girly with that pretty little face, but that _body_... I'm sorry, but can I just say fuck yeah?"

"Not helping, Dor," James complained. "Really not. They're watching him, right now, in person. She's standing in a crowd of hundreds and screaming his name and wondering why I can't move my hips like that. It is _really not helping_."

"I agree," Remus said with a sigh. "Why don't we talk about something else?"

Edgar laughed. "You two are ridiculous. And besides, Remus, you bought them the tickets. You brought your misery on yourself."

Remus ran a hand through his hair and grinned, trying to lighten the mood by saying, "Oh, I'm not worried. Not like James. Not only is Taylor married and straight, but Lily knows James would never hurt her. Sirius, on the other hand, would have to fear for his bits forever if he left me for a boy with _highlights_."

"Yeah!" Dorcas hooted, pumping her fist in the air. "Remus, your cool points just went way fucking up. Also, your _queer_ points. That was such a fucking faggy thing to say. I love it."

Edgar snorted. "Queer points? Really, Dor? No offense, Remus, but I'm pretty sure that Fabian wins in that department."

"Oh, I wouldn't dream of competing with Fabian in that area," Remus said. "He won a _dance_ competition not too long ago, remember?"

"Even Fabian can't shake his hips like Taylor Hanson," James said morosely, and then perked up visibly. "Hey! Maybe he's gay! Maybe the wife thing is just a beard!"

Remus blinked. "Shut _up_."

***

Huddled close together, standing outside of the venue after the show, Lily and Sirius clutched their respective copies of The Walk's jacket in their hands, waiting patiently for the band to leave the building. Both were determined that, after all this time spent being fans, they really ought to get around to meeting the blokes. Maybe even get a picture together with Taylor that could be framed later and put on display to annoy the shit out of James and Remus.

When the doors opened and Taylor Hanson walked out, Lily couldn't help but squeal a little bit.

After pausing to sign a few autographs of people closer to the doors, Taylor finally reached Lily and Sirius. Tucking his still slightly sweaty hair behind his ear with the hand that had the sharpie in it, he smiled at the two huddled close together before him.

"Thanks for coming out. Waiting in this weather, how dedicated, thank you," he said evenly. "Who do you want me to make the signatures out to?"

"Sirius," Sirius blurted, handing Taylor his CD jacket. "On mine, I mean, obviously. Um. It was a great show, really great. You were great."

Lily was beaming and said, "Lily," (rather calmly, she thought), handing over her CD. "You were brilliant," she added, and then, like word vomit, came out, "My husband thinks you're ridiculous."

"Does he?" Taylor asked, amused. "And why is that? And sorry, did you say serious? Seriously? Like, 's' 'e'... I mean, how do you spell that?"

"Um, like the star," Sirius said. "S-i-r-i-u-s. My parents... had a weird affinity for astrology."

Lily had been a bit taken aback (not expecting have to explain why exactly James thought Taylor Hanson was ridiculous), and paused for a moment before saying, "Well. I suppose it's because you're sexier than he is."

"Like the star, cool," Taylor commented off-handedly. "What constellation is that in?" At Lily's words, Taylor looked up from where he was concentrating on spelling Sirius' name correctly. "I, ah. Thank you. Though, you know, you probably ought to find your husband sexier than me."

Lily laughed. "That's two different sorts of sexy. James is his own brand of sexy."

"No kidding," Sirius agreed. "Our significant others just don't _appreciate_ us liking Hanson. If Remus was here right now, he'd probably punch you," Sirius said. "And isn't sirius in something... canis? I don't even know."

"Well. That's good. I'm sure James would be glad to know that," Taylor replied, looking a little bashful about all the sexy talk. Handing Sirius' CD booklet back (on which he'd written 'Sirius: Cool name. You're a star. Thanks for coming out. Taylor'), Taylor began on Lily's. "Remus? That's an odd name. What nationality is she, if you don't mind me asking?"

"She's a he. And he's pretty English," Sirius answered. "His parents named him after some historical story about twins. Bugger if I know."

"Remus and Romulus," Lily said. "I can't remember how the story goes myself."

Once again, Taylor's eyes flew up from the CD booklet. "Oh. So. Your... boyfriend wants to... punch me?

Sirius was grinning widely and said, "Well. Honestly, he's more the sort to give you a stern talking to. He punches like a girl, usually."

"Ah. Well, no offence to him, but I'm glad he's not here. Whether or not he punches like a girl doesn't matter, I hate lectures," Taylor said, dropping his eyes back down and finishing his messy scrawl. (Lily's read 'Lily: Keep smiling through the rain. Thanks a lot. Taylor'.) "You two have a great night, okay?"

"Think we could get a quick picture?" Sirius asked, pulling a disposable camera out of his jacket pocket.

"Sure, of course," Taylor said, and then gestured to one of the lingering security guards. "Do you mind, man?"

"Nah, no problem," the man said, taking the camera and winding in.

Taylor scooted between Lily and Sirius and curled an arm around each of their shoulders. "Ready?"

Lily and Sirius both nodded and looked at the camera, grinning like idiots as the guard snapped the photo. It was surreal, Sirius thought, to have Taylor Hanson's hand on his shoulder. Lily on the other hand could think nothing coherent and was squeeing as though 13 on the inside. Once the guy handed the camera back, Sirius and Lily shook Taylor's hand, thanked him, and then sighed as they watched his retreating back.

"I can die a happy man now," Sirius commented dreamily.

"He's so adorable," Lily said. A little dense, but adorable. "And we have photographic evidence! James and Remus are going to be unimpressed."

"Ah, screw 'em," Sirius said. "They'll never get it. They'll probably always be too busy wondering if we like Taylor's arse better than theirs." Tilting his head on the side, Sirius added, "It does look quite nice in those trousers."

Lily and Sirius exchanged mischievious looks, and then giggled.


	18. Come Rain or Come Shine (April 24th-26th, 2007)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Where Gideon is a shithead, Edgar finally experiences pregnancy's hormones first hand, and Sirius Black is no Gary Oldman.

Gideon took a bite out of his sandwich with a happy sort of snuffling noise. He was _starving_. He'd gotten a call from Lou at five on his day off because the truck was delayed and Lou couldn't get through to the shippers _again_. So Gideon had dragged his arse out of bed, gotten dressed, went into work without so much as a banana, and cleaned up Lou's mess, _again_. Gideon would never understand why, of the two of them, Lou had gotten the management position over him.

He took another bite of his sandwich and grinned through a mouthful of egg salad. He'd left work as soon as he knew Lou wouldn't blow anything up, and loosening his tie he said, "Mols, this is the best bloody sandwich I've ever eaten."

"Yeah, good food as usual, Mols," Fabian agreed.

"More, more, more, more," little Ron chanted, pushing his empty plate away.

"Mummy, Ron wants more," Percy informed his mother. "If he gets more, can I have more too?"

"Are you even still hungry?" Fabian asked with a grin. Ron could put it away, the stocky little monster, and even though Percy was quite a bit older, he couldn't keep up with Ron.

"No, but it's only fair," Percy answered. Just then, the twins came barrelling through, screaming with laughter and effectively disrupting the relative quiet of the early lunch.

Gideon barely noticed the rowdy crowd of youngsters; he just inhaled his sandwich and half fell asleep at the table until he felt his cell phone vibrate in his trouser pockets and grimaced. "If fucking Lou is calling me again I'm going to throw him off a bridge," Gideon scowled, pulling out his handy and flipping it open without looking at the ID. "Are you really that incapable of supervising an unload, Lou?" he asked irritably.

"I need you," Marlene moaned into the phone. "Stubby can't skip rehearsal and I need someone to come here. I'm feverish and I have stomach pain and I'm dizzy and I'm nauseous, and I don't want to be alone..."

Gideon's stomach dropped, and once again he ignored any and all mention of Stubby where Marlene was concerned. "Do you know what you've got?"

"I don't know, I don't know," she wailed, hands shaking and sweating so much she could hardly hold onto the phone. "Just come over, please. I need you, Gid."

She needed him. He had to go. "Yeah, okay, I'll be over in a few."

As Gideon hung up the phone, Fabian furrowed his brows. "Uh, not Lou again, was it?"

"Marlene's sick," Gideon answered, stuffing the last of his sandwich into his mouth and standing up. "I'm going to go see her."

"Oh," Fabian said, a little shocked. "Okay. Is it serious?"

"She doesn't sound too good," Gideon said, heading to the side door and grabbing his coat of the hook. "She says she has a fever and stomach pains..."

"Okay," Fabian said. "Well, call if you need anything. And let me know when you know if she's okay, yeah?"

"Yeah, keep your handy on," Gideon said worriedly, and then opened the door and left.

***

Marlene wished that Gideon would hurry. She was scared. She hadn't felt this sick in pretty much as long as she could remember. She was so sick that all she could do was sit curled up in the corner, wrap her arms around her knees, and rock back and forth while she waited.

Gideon practically flew out of the van and into Marlene's building. He didn't even knock when he got upstairs, just opened the door and rushed over to her with his eyebrows furrowed, automatically pressing the back of his hand to Marlene's forehead.

"You're burning up, come on, we're getting you in the bath, now."

He pulled his jacket and tie off, and hung them on the headboard, and then started to roll up his sleeves.

"Gideon, I don't feel good," Marlene murmured, letting her head loll back and thunk against the wall so she could look blearily up at him.

"I know, baby, I know," Gideon said, and pulled himself closer to her as he started to remove her clothes. "But I'm here, and I'm going to make you better." Once she was naked Gideon scooped her up and headed into the bathroom, setting her in the bathtub. He put the tub stop in and turned on the cold water.

Marlene moved away from the water as soon s it splashed her, beginning to shiver immediately. "It's too cold!"

"I know you're cold, Marlene, but the cold water is going to make you feel better," Gideon said. He reached beside the sink for a facecloth and made it wet, sponging all over Marlene's body. "You've got to trust me, Kinny."

"But I don't like it," Marlene whined, trying her hardest to lay still. She still couldn't help but hiss as she squirmed in discomfort. "Seriously, seriously, I don't like it. Gid, please..."

"I know you don't like it, Kinny, baby, I know, I know," Gideon said in a soothing voice, but kept sponging Marlene with the cloth. "It'll be over soon, Kinny, just hold out a little longer. We want to get your fever down."

Marlene was well aware that when she got sick, she reverted back to, oh, about nine years old. But she didn't even care. Gideon wasn't going to laugh at her. All she had to do was let him help her. And that meant trusting him, even if that required shaking like a leaf in a tub of cold water.

"I think I'm going to puke," Marlene said, leaning over the edge of the tub and latching onto Gideon. As soon as she began to gag, she moved away from Gid so she wouldn't puke all over him and ended up vomiting right into her bathwater. It was over quickly and she turned to look at Gideon once she was done. "Um. I should probably get out of the bath now."

Gideon sighed but pulled the plug and helped Marlene out of the tub. "Just stand there," he told her, and rinsed out the tub, leaving the cold running and soaking a new, clean cloth (since Marlene had gotten a little spray on the other one). He kneeled in front of her, looking up at her as he began washing the sick off of her skin softly.

Marlene clasped her hands together tightly under her chin and stood as still as she could, only swaying a little out of dizziness and shuddering from the cold every so often.

"I just want to go to bed," Marlene whimpered as Gideon got out a towel and began drying her off.

"I know, baby, and that's where you're going," Gideon told her softly, and led her carefully from the bathroom to the bed and set her down. He took the heavy quilt off, leaving her with a thin blanket. Until she fell asleep she had to stay cool, no matter how cold she felt. "Lie down, Marlene," he instructed, and once she did he tucked the corners around her and said, "Now sleep. I'm going to wake you up later to eat, okay?"

"Okay," Marlene breathed, leaning her face into his hand as he tucked the blanket around her shoulder. "You're not going to leave though, right? You're staying with me?"

"No, I'm going to stay," Gideon assured her. "I'll be here when you wake up, and with chicken soup. Now go to sleep."

After she'd finally drifted off, albeit restlessly, Gideon closed the closed the curtain and sat on a barstool at Marlene's little island and pulled out his handy, dialling Fabian's number.

"What's up, Gideon?" Fabian answered happily, glad for the excuse to pass Ginny off to Molly. He could smell the dirty diaper and didn't really want to change it. "Everything okay?"

"She was practically on fire when I got over here. Stuck her in the bath right away, and now she's sleeping," Gideon said, tactfully leaving out the throwing up in the tub bit. "Want to do me a favour and bring me over a frozen tub of Molly's chicken soup, and stop by the pharmacy? I just. I'd go myself, but I don't want to leave her right now."

"Sure thing, big brother. Caradoc's on his way over, and we'll zip it to you as soon as he gets here. What do you want?" Fabian asked. "From the pharmacy, I mean."

"Something for the flu or cold. Ask the pharmacist. Tell her she's feverish and throwing up and that sort of thing, and just get whatever they recommend. I'm making Marlene go to the doctor in the morning."

"Will do. I'll be there as soon as I can," Fabian said. "Anything else? Grapefruit juice or tissues with moisturizers in them or anything like that?"

"Whatever you mind to get, honestly," Gideon answered tiredly, and glanced at the curtain as he heard Marlene stir. "Bye, Fabian."

He set about making himself a cup of tea and occupied himself with a magazine until Fabian and Caradoc arrived with soup and pills and juice and other necessary things that Gideon hadn't had enough wit about him to suggest. It was times like these (as he woke Marlene long enough to force the medication the pharmacist had recommended into her system, along with some water) he thanked God for level-headed little brothers.

After Fabian and Caradoc left, Gideon put the soup in the microwave to let it defrost before cooking, and sat beside the bed for a while with his head propped up on his hand, watching her. She mumbled through her delirium, tossing and turning, and Gideon felt righteous anger boil in his face when he thought of Stubby, the little shit, leaving her to fend for herself. Gideon didn't care what his excuse was, and nine chances out of ten it was a lie anyhow, because the band was starting tour the next month and the selfish bastard probably didn't want to end up sick because of Marlene. He didn't deserve her. He didn't _appreciate_ her. Gideon didn't even know who Stubby _was_ anymore, but he certainly wasn't the same, good-natured bloke they'd grown up with.

Marlene deserved someone who loved her, inside and out, even when she was covered in throw up and feverish and acting eight years old. She deserved someone who could take care of her. Who would do everything in his being to make her feel happy and loved. He wanted her. He wanted all of her. She was _right there_ , but she was _just_ out of his reach.

The tears welled up in his eyes as he watched her sleep, and it was a good while before the microwave beeped him out of his trance. He set about heating up the soup on the stove. Marlene had been asleep for three hours now, and she needed to eat. Having piled a tray of juice and soup, Gideon set it on the night table and shook Marlene gently. "Kinny, baby, wake-up," he said quietly. "You have to wake up now, Marlene."

Marlene came to with a hacking cough. She swallowed and rubbed her face. The sensation of clammy hands on skin damp from sweat did nothing to settle her still queasy stomach, and Marlene propped herself up on one elbow, closing her eyes and breathing deeply in the hopes that she wouldn't blow chunks all over Gideon.

She managed to keep it down--though she hadn't eaten in hours so there wasn't exactly anything left to come up--and finally cleared her throat and looked up at Gideon.

"Christ, I feel like I've been hit by a bloody train," she croaked, shakily moving to sit up properly, not even noticing that she was still naked. "What time is it?"

"4:30," Gideon answered. "I've made soup. Well, technically Molly made soup and I re-heated it for you, but the sentiment is the same."

"You're too good to me, Gid," Marlene said with a pained smile. "Okay, so, I still feel like crap, but it's in a detached, dazed sort of way. You've pumped me full of all sorts of cold and flu meds, haven't you?"

"I made you swallow a few, yeah," Gideon said. "Now eat the soup. Least you could do after I cleaned sick off of you." He grinned at her teasingly, happy to see her in the right state of mind.

"Oh god. Really?" she asked, wrinkling her nose in disgust as she began to stir her soup. "I remember that. In the tub, right? Disgusting. If I were you, I would've just called my mom and left her to deal with me."

"Don't stir it," Gideon said. "Put some on the spoon, stick it in your mouth and swallow. You need to eat. And you also need to see a doctor."

"My fever broke, and I'm on the mend," Marlene said. "I don't have to go to the doctor."

After speaking, Marlene took a tiny slurp of soup. She was wary of putting stuff in her stomach. She'd probably just puke it up again anyway. She'd vomited like, three or four times before Gideon had gotten there, and she wasn't looking forward to starting that up again.

Gideon rolled his eyes. "Eat the damn soup," he said. "And you could still get worse, Marlene, so _promise me_ you'll go to the doctor tomorrow."

"I hate doctors. If I'm still feeling gross, I'll go," Marlene conceded, and then took a larger bite of soup to appease Gideon.

"No, you'll go no matter how you feel," Gideon said. "You were over the moon bats with fever by the time I got here and the doctor'll give you a prescription."

"That bad, huh?" Marlene sighed. "Fine. But you're driving me."

"I'll pick you up on my way to work," Gideon agreed. "Oh, and Kinny... why were you muttering about Eddie Bones in your sleep? I know you're mates and all, but he was in the mutterings with me and Stubby during your delusions." She'd only mentioned him once, and Gideon was just teasing; he wondered if she remembered any of her fever dreams.

"Did I?" Marlene mused, and took another few bites of her soup. "I don't remember. You, Ed, and Stubby, hmm?"

That was an odd combination. The first thing that popped to mind while trying to find a commonality between them was that they were the only three men she'd ever slept with.

Gideon shrugged. "You said a lot of random things, like 'pudding' and 'nurgle', too. I figured it was part of some screwed up dream."

Suddenly Marlene thought about having sex with all of them at once, and began to giggle. Stubby and Gideon would kill each other, and Edgar would just blush and obsess about what Dorcas was going to do to him. It was far more laughable than it was sexy.

"Yeah, must've been," Marlene replied.

"What's so funny?" Gideon asked, suspicious.

"Well," Marlene said, and wondered if Gideon would find it as funny as she did. Probably not, but she could tell him anyway. "Okay, so I was just imagining what a ridiculous orgy you, me, Stubby, and Eddie would make."

Gideon raised his eyebrows. "Why would you imagine that?"

"You, Ed, and Stubby are the only people I've ever had sex with. It's the first common denominator I thought of between you," Marlene said casually and then set the soup down on the night stand and put her hands against her face. "Whoa, dizzy spell."

"You slept with Ed," Gideon deadpanned.

"Yeah, once," Marlene answered, too distracted by her own sickness to pick up the high levels of 'not okay' in Gideon's voice. "It was so awkward. He was the first guy after you."

"But. Edgar Bones?" Gideon questioned, disbelieving. "When? Where? How did it come to pass?" He felt like a nosy school girl, but news that Gideon now had to add Edgar (a bloke he quite liked, as far as blokes go) to his list of people to kick the living shit out of annoyed him greatly. But it was unavoidable. He'd been _in_ Marlene and that was _not cool_. "I'm going to beat him senseless."

"I'm not going to tell you anything if you're going to be a total git," Marlene said, frowning at him. "Why would you beat him up?"

Gideon's cheeks burned red and he stammered, "Because he's touched you. In places."

"And that doesn't mean _you_ get to touch _him_ in places," Marlene quipped, and then gave Gideon a look. "Stop being stupid about it. I'm not one to go beating up Hestia, am I? And anyway, it was my idea. I was pissed at Horrace's and he took me home. I begged him to come in, literally. It was either befriend him or avoid him, and in the interest of the Order... you'd better get me a bucket. Now, please, now. Under the sink."

Gideon obliged quickly and as Marlene heaved into the bucket, Gideon asked, "So when was this again?"

Marlene emptied her stomach--again--and then set the bucket down and wiped her mouth. She couldn't believe Gid was making such a big deal out of it. "The night of Stubby's Halloween party. I was dressed up as Dorothy."

Gideon thought for a moment and then said, "Wasn't he still in high school then?" ignoring the fact that he was currently 'with' Hestia when she was a year younger than Edgar. "And I didn't see you at that party. I was there as Dick Tracey."

"I climbed out the window as soon as I saw you," Marlene admitted. "I was feeling particularly emotional that night. If it hadn't been Ed, it would've been someone else. You should be thanking him, not hating him. He made it as painless as possible. It could've been really bad for me."

"He still did it," Gideon grumbled.

"Yeah, he did. And he felt like shit about it, too," Marlene said. "You're not allowed to say a thing to anyone about it."

Gideon pursed his lips. "I have to say _something_ , Marlene!"

"No, you don't," Marlene said. "And you _won't_. Promise, Gideon."

"Marlene!" Gideon whined. "He's probably expecting me to bring it up, you know. It's a guy thing. It's not going to turn out the way it did when Stubby and I got into that fist fight and I broke his nose."

"No, Gid," Marlene insisted, flopping back onto the bed and putting a weary hand over her stomach. "Promise."

Groaning Gideon said, "Fine! I won't say anything!"

"Good," Marlene sighed. "Hell, my head is pounding. Can I have some aspirin or something?"

"Yeah, sure," Gideon said, getting up and heading for the counter where he'd left all the pills and paraphernalia Fabian had brought. "By the way, we're going to have a core Order meeting on Thursday. Think you'll be up for it?"

"Yeah. I'll be fine by tomorrow, just you watch," Marlene said, and then broke into a coughing fit that was so powerful it made her eyes water. "This won't last long."

***

**The Next Day**

Though she'd asked him to come in and he'd said he wanted to, Gideon had had to go to work. But Marlene had promised, and she kept her promises, at least to Gideon. The doctor's office smelled over-cleaned, but still sick. The smell was one of the reasons she hated the damned places so much. She coughed as she walked up to the receptionist's desk and gave the woman her name and information, hoping all the while that she wouldn't throw one of her lungs up over the woman's nice, teal coloured scrubs.

She was about to sit in a chair beside the door when a familiar voice called out to her. Turning around she was surprised to see Dorcas grinning nervously at her, waving her down from her seat.

"What the fuck are you doing here?" Dorcas asked Marlene as soon as she sat down, glad to have a distraction from the waiting. Dorcas hated not doing anything, and not doing anything while she was worried about what she was about to do was even worse. "I fucking hate these places, you know? And ever since the whole 'whoops I'm preggers' thing, I've been spending annoying amounts of time here."

"Me too," Marlene agreed. "And Gideon made me come. Here, I mean. He rescued me from fever induced hallucinations yesterday and this is his reward. And what's this for you, check-up or something?"

"Or something, I guess," Dorcas said and shrugged. "Ed's mum is worried about me. Apparently I'm even fucking fatter than I'm supposed to be. Wanted me to get it checked out."

"Ah," Marlene said. "How far along are you, again?"

"Uh, hang on," Dorcas said, and began counting on her fingers. She was a little bit over eleven weeks (she'd been keeping track on the calendar in her locker and checked days off every morning like some kind of fucking nerd or something, not that she'd admit it, even to Ed), but she didn't really care to look obsessive, so she took her time before replying. "Not quite three months, I guess."

"Wow, and you've already got quite a tummy going there," Marlene said, looking at Dorcas' _just_ obviously pregnant stomach.

"Yeah, fuck you," Dorcas said sullenly, but not meanly. "The kid better not be giant or something. I'm not pushing it out if it's going to fucking split me in two."

Marlene snorted. "So have you two picked out any names yet? Nothing too outlandish, I hope, for Edgar's sake."

"Michele or Michael Rocket Bones," Dorcas said proudly, effectively distracted. "I wanted something funkier, but Ed insisted we tone the first name down, at least."

Smiling Marlene said, "I honestly expected you to con him into naming it... I dunno, Tiger or something completely ridiculous. He'd jump over the moon for you, but I guess he's allowed to get his way sometimes too, hmm?"

"I suggested that! Tiger, I mean," Dorcas said excitedly. "I think it'd be a fucking awesome name. Tiger Rocket Bones. I'd fucking love it if it were me."

"Yeah, but the kid won't be you. It'll be a piece of you, and a piece of Edgar and hopefully it'll inherit Edgar's common sense and your penchant for mayhem. So it'll be like stealth, you know? But wild. I guess. It's not even my kid and you're slowly getting me obsessed. Anyhow. Why's Ed's mum worried about you again?"

"I'm bigger than I should be, I guess," Dorcas said. "I'm not just fucking large, I'm biggie size."

"Oh. Well. There must be more to it than that," Marlene thought out loud. "If she wanted you to see a doctor, I mean."

Dorcas sighed. "She thinks I might be pregnant with twins."

Marlene blinked, shocked. "Seriously?"

"I fucking hope not," Dorcas said. The receptionist called Dorcas then, and Dorcas stood up. "I guess we'll find out."

***

**The Next Day**

"Right, so, I mean, there's not much we can do for that now. Thanks Lily, though. It'll come in handy later." Gideon sighed, shifting where he sat, and shooting Edgar another unforgivably dirty look across the coffee table. Edgar kept raising his eyebrows in surprise, but every time he attempted to ask what had crawled up Gideon's arse, Gideon cut him off, like now. They were talking about some information Lily had come across regarding the screening process for new employees. "Until Remus cracks the employee file information, or the email banks at least, we won't know who is on their payroll."

"No pressure," Sirius muttered.

"I'm trying," Remus said apologetically. "I really don't think it's possible to do it from an outside computer. Maybe if I could get in and use one of theirs..."

"Now _that_ would be a bloody wicked mission," James said with a grin. "It'd be right out of a spy movie."

Gideon shrugged. "Well, it’s something to think about though obviously there'd be a lot of planning involved. I mean, it's not as though they'd just let us waltz right in or anything."

"We'd have to be really careful," Fabian said. "Something like that wouldn't be a slap on the wrist. It could be some pretty decent jail time."

"Which I am definitely _not_ interested in," Remus said with a smile. "But it's always a possibility with what we do."

"I'll go," Dorcas offered. "I feel kind of fucking useless lately anyway."

"You're pregnant, Dor, that's an even bigger risk, right there," Gideon said, shaking his head. "It'll just have to be Remus and maybe two other people. Getaway man and a lookout sort of deal."

"I could do lookout, I suppose," Sirius said. "I mean, your guy that cleans the place, he could probably get us in, yeah?"

"And me," James offered. "I so called it. I'll drive the getaway car! My baby can _burn rubber_."

"Your fucking station wagon?" Dorcas snickered. "Yeah, that's one bad ride, man."

"It goes from point A to point B," Marlene piped up. "That's more than you or I have. I don't think we ought to be criticizing."

Sirius laughed and exclaimed, "We could be giddy grandmas!"

"Well. You lot are bound together by some eerie sort of gravitational pull, so I'll leave to you to plan something _sensible_ ," he said pointedly, causing Sirius and James to grin at Remus, who rolled his eyes. "And you know, get back to us." With that Gideon nodded and shot Edgar another dirty look. He was due. Before he could redirect the conversation however, Edgar exploded.

"Okay, what the _fuck_ did I do, Gideon?" he asked, exasperated. "You've been looking at me as though you'd like to strangle me all afternoon."

"Uh oh," Marlene said under her breath, but before she could attempt to redirect the conversation herself, she choked on nothing and began to cough. Wonderful timing.

Dorcas raised her eyebrows at Ed and then looked over to Gideon. "Got a fucking problem with my boyfriend, Gideon?"

Marlene made him promise. He said he wouldn't say anything. He promised her. "Maybe," Gideon said cryptically, and folded his arms across his chest.

"What is this, grade school?" Lily asked no one in particular.

"Out with it then," Edgar insisted. "You've never said a word about anything to me before, Gid, what's with the sudden hostility?"

"It's nothing," Marlene managed to squawk out between hacking up a lung, but the effort of getting the words out had her convulsing again.

"Did something happen?" James asked. "And are you okay, Marlene?"

Marlene was trying to catch her breath, and she nodded, wiping away the watery eyes. "Yeah. I'm okay. And Gideon has no problem with Edgar. He's just being a twat."

Edgar looked from Gideon to Marlene and his mouth formed and 'O' shape of sudden understanding. "Oh. Shit."

"Oh shit what?" Dorcas asked, flicking Ed in the arm.

"Does anyone recall how badly it went last time we decided to pry?" Marlene asked.

"Yeah, but everyone always gets so worked up about sex. That's different," James said. He tilted his head thoughtfully and added, "Oh. Ha. It totally is about sex, isn't it? Uh oh."

"Oh, no," Lily said. "You two didn't."

Sirius was grinning and asked, "Is there a memo I keep missing about the interchanging of partners like socks? Because I always feel so left out."

Remus angled Sirius a possessive sort of look and then put a hand on Sirius' thigh. "Too bad."

"You two can have your fucking argument later," Dorcas said, leaning forward. "Ed. What the fuck is going on?"

"This is ridiculous. Gideon, you're a prick," Marlene said and dropped her head into her hands. This was going to blow right up, she could feel it.

"I didn't say anything!" Gideon said indignantly. "You told me to keep my mouth shut and I did. Edgar brought this on himself."

"Oh fuck off, Gideon, you really are being a twat," Edgar snapped. "It was nearly three years ago for Christ's sake."

"Oh boy," Fabian said. "Okay, pause this. Dorcas, sit down. Three years is a long time. It's old news, and it doesn't count."

"Like hell it doesn't!" Dorcas snapped. "And I will not sit the fuck down, you condescending fucker. You _slept_ with _Marlene_?"

"Yes," Edgar said frankly. "It was before I met you. And you knew I slept with birds before you, Dorcas."

"He was threatening to catch up to mine and Gideon's legendary status, actually," Sirius said.

"Sirius. Shut up," Lily instructed, giving him a look of disbelief of his random idiocy.

"Yeah, whatever, big slut. That's fine, I don't care," Dorcas spat, giving Sirius a venomous look. "There could've been a hundred nameless, faceless girls, but you still spend lots of fucking time with Marlene. Don't you think that's a little fucking weird? I don't hang out with any of the girls I've fucked."

"Oh boy," James said, giving Lily a look. Dorcas had that look about her. That irrationally emotional look that James had come to know and fear throughout Lily's pregnancy. "Here it comes."

Edgar didn't know how to put it into context. "It wasn't. We just. We made friends out of it; I don't know what to say. What do you want me to do, reverse time and take it back?"

"You made _friends_ out of it? Is that how you start off all your friendships?" Dorcas asked, glaring. She'd rather be angry than upset, and she could feel upset coming. She would change her name to Sissy McSissypants before she burst into tears in front of everyone. Angry was definitely better. "I can't believe you didn't fucking tell me before this. I would've told you if I'd fucked one of my good friends."

"I'm sorry!" Edgar said, looking a little frightened. "It didn't... I mean. It was just sex! We didn't date! It was a one time thing. It didn't feel like a necessary sort of thing to tell."

Oh no. And there were tears there. There was no fucking reason for there to be tears. Dorcas panicked and pulled the hood from her jumper up over her face. "Take me home right now, Edgar Bones."

"So called it," James whispered in Lily's direction.

Edgar was startled completely and hoped to his feet. He mouthed, 'I'm going to kill you!' at Gideon, who couldn't help but smirk in return. 

"Dorcas, Dorcas," Edgar said softly. "Don't cry. I'm sorry. I'm really sorry. Don't cry."

"Shut up," Dorcas hissed. "Are you fucking stupid? Just take me home!"

Edgar clucked his tongue and raised his eyebrows. "Excuse me?"

"You know what, I don't fucking need you to get home. I'll walk," she said, and made for the door. What was wrong with her? Since when did she stand up in front of everyone and cry and beg a boy for anything? That wasn't Dorcas and she didn't like it. It was downright embarrassing, actually, and she just wanted to get out of there.

Marlene turned and shoved Gideon hard, pushing him right off his position perched on the arm of his favourite armchair and sending him tumbling to the ground. "Don't bloody smirk. Look what you did, Gideon."

"Thanks, Gid, really, because what I needed today was for you to bring up ancient history that just causes bad feelings," Edgar said. "You're a great friend, really! Couldn't possibly be more thoughtful than that."

"Christ," Gideon said from the floor, because he didn't really know what to say.

"You know, this is the second meeting in a row that someone's stormed out," James commented. "Who's going to follow this time?"

"I vote you," Sirius said. "Since Ed went last time and all. Apparently. Not that I was here."

Edgar ran a hand through his hair. Dorcas was outside by now and he didn't know what to do. "Fuck, Gideon!"

"What do you want me to say? She'll be fine," Gideon said.

"Right. Her blood pressure is up because she's stress eating, and stock-piling bullshit on her was completely unnecessary. The doctor told her that if she doesn't slow it down and watch what she's doing she's going to end up on bed rest for the majority of the pregnancy," Edgar explained. "So again, thank you, because in the grand scheme of things your momentary jealousy over something that happened eons ago is far superior to the health of my girlfriend and our unborn child."

"Right. Well, you stay here and yell, and I'll go out after your girlfriend," James said, half to himself and half to the others. "Don't worry. I'm a professional. I can deal with pregnant women."

And with that, James kissed Lily on the cheek and took the stairs two at a time to bolt out after Dorcas.

Remus raised his eyebrows and said, "Not that I don't trust your good judgement, Edgar, but just because emotions seem to be a little high at the moment, why don't we just take a few steps back and get out of swinging range?"

Edgar personally thought that at the moment, his good judgement was completely fucked. Eyeing Gideon and sitting down on the couch, beside Lily in James' vacant spot, Edgar huffed and crossed his arms.

"In the history of stupid fucking things to do--and I've got a lot of experience in this area--that was pretty fucking stupid," Sirius commented dully.

"Agreed," Marlene said, and continued to glare at Gid. "I told you not to say anything and here you go and bring it up with Dorcas in the room? How thick are you?"

"Okay!" Fabian exploded. "Can we all just get over it already? Yeah, he was jealous over something stupid and so he acted stupid about it, but we've all done that. Now don't get me wrong, I'm not trying to say he wasn't stupid, but give him a break. It isn't his fault Dorcas over-reacted, and honestly, Marlene, you should've known Gid well enough to know telling him wasn't the brightest idea either. And Gid, just because I'm jumping to your defence doesn't mean I don't think you owe Edgar one _hell_ of an apology. Because you do. But we all need to stop jumping all over each other."

Sighing thoughtfully Lily remarked, "It seems that lately we've just been waiting for the chance to jump all over one another."

"Right. Well. Sorry, Edgar, mate. Really," Gideon said. "I don't know if you understand..." It was hard to defend doing something stupidly and blindly because of one girl--woman--and what Gideon felt for her. He couldn't justify it. "Marlene is just..."

"I get it," Edgar said. "Trust me, Gideon, I get it. Apology accepted, and Fabian's right. Let's be done with it."

"Marlene is just what, Gideon? Did you forget I was still in the room?" Marlene asked, feeling awkward.

Part of Marlene wanted to bring up Stubby, remind Gideon she wasn't his to be jealous over, and just run back to a safe zone somewhere. But then... the rest of her wanted to just smile and tell him not to be so stupid about her and laugh it off because she was enjoying having him in her life too much to be willing to wreck it.

Marlene settled for shaking her head. "You're such a boy, Gideon."

Fabian blinked. Well. That was certainly not the reaction he'd been expecting. He wished Emmeline was here to see it, if only so Fay could hear what she thought of the situation. Marlene hadn't run at least.

Gideon smiled a little shyly. "Marlene is just a silly bint," he teased. Truth be told, had Edgar let him finish his sentence he'd have probably said, 'Marlene is just... the love of my life.' He knew that she probably knew that, but as long as the words didn't come out of his mouth they could stay 'friends' or whatever it was they were doing. He couldn't handle losing her. Not again.

"Says the boy who blew the meeting with his sex life _again_ ," Marlene returned. "Or. Well. My sex life, today."

Remus sighed. "While sex does tend to raise tensions, Lily is right. We're all too quick to snap at each other lately. It's not healthy."

"For a no longer secret society, we are seriously becoming overwhelmed by our own personal secrets. If we're going to win this fight, or _war_ , or whatever Riddle happens to call it, we're going to have to learn to get past these silly, petty things. Work through our problems, you know?" Lily said. "Or he's going to win."

"He's already winning," Sirius said glumly. "He's got us looking over our shoulders and not trusting our friends and second guessing everything we used to be so sure about."

"Well, not entirely. Let's not be too pessimistic now. At least we still make up after our more and more frequent blow outs," Remus pointed out. "When we stop doing that, he's effectively broken the lot of us up. We're not near there yet."

"At the rate we're going, I'd say the end is near," Edgar commented. "And so we'll face the final curtain."

Lily grinned at Edgar. "My friend, I'll say it clear. I'll state my case, of which I'm certain."

"I've lived a life that's full. I've travelled each and every highway," Fabian chipped in, smiling.

"And more, much more than this," Sirius sang, doing his best Sid Vicious impression, "I did it myyyyyyyyy wayyyyyyyyy!"

"Sirius," Remus said, lips quirking into a smirk. "No matter how loudly you wail, I still maintain that Gary Oldman makes a much better Sid Vicious."

While Sirius pouted, everyone laughed, and Lily said, "Aw, Sirius. Don't worry. I don't think Gary Oldman has anything on you."

***

The very moment James stepped outside, he wished he'd fobbed the job off on someone else. Not that he didn't care about Dorcas. The core Order was family, and he thought of Dor like the obscene little sister he never had. But it was raining and she was pregnant and it was just going to be such a pain in the arse. Nonetheless, he'd do it.

Dorcas was sitting on the hood of Edgar's car, and James made his way over, climbing up and sitting next to her.

"So," James began slowly, and then decided to just jump right in. "Ed and Marlene really are just friends, you know. He'd never decide he liked her better. You have to know how totally whipped he is for you."

"He still fucking slept with her," Dorcas mumbled, pulling her hood tighter around her face to hide her tears from James.

"Before he bloody met you," James reminded her. "Look. You don't really care about that. You know, when Lily was pregnant, she made me sleep on the couch for a night because I went for drinks with a couple coworkers, one of which was female and drop dead gorgeous. She trusted me. She knew it wasn't anything. But she just got so worked up and then felt so weird about getting so worked up... You just have to take a step back."

Dorcas chanced a look at James, wiping her eyes with the back of her hands. "It's just. It's all fucking bad enough, you know? And Ed's been so good to me, and he's put up with my shit, and I mean, I can be a real cunt sometimes."

"Yeah," James said exaggeratedly, and then grinned when she swore at him and punched him in the shoulder. "Come on, kid. Don't be so hard on yourself. And don't be so hard on him, either. He'd do anything for you. Don't let pride bollocks up a good thing."

Dorcas took a deep breath. "He'd better do fucking anything for me," she said, putting her hands on her pregnant belly. "His kid is doing a number on my fucking figure."

James laughed. "Just wait until about seven or eight months in. You won't be able to see your own feet, which will be swollen by the way, and you're going to really want that thing out of you. It isn't going to be easy, but you'll be fine if you just remember people are on your side."

Dorcas rolled her eyes. "I'm still not going to be able to fucking look at the two of them together without thinking about it."

"Let it go, you neurotic little freak," James teased. "Just let it go."

Dorcas gave James a push, and then slid off the hood of the car. "Fine," she said. "But James? Tell me one fucking thing."

"I once stuck a marble up my nose," James said immediately, sliding off the car after her. "Oh, or did you have a particular one thing in mind?"

"Ha ha," Dorcas said, rolling her eyes. "Did Ed..." she bit her lip. "What did he say after I left?"

"Hoo boy, was he ever mad," James whistled. "You should've heard him. He reamed Gideon right out for causing you extra stress. Hey, I didn't know you were having blood pressure problems and stuff. You're going to be all right, though."

"Well at least it wasn't fucking twins," Dorcas said, pleased.

"You thought it might've been twins?" James asked. Mind trip. He couldn't imagine twins, for he and Lily or for Ed and Dor. It would be a totally different set of issues. "Whoa. Are you relieved?"

"Ed's mum thought it was, and so did the fucking doctor until he did the ultrasound," Dorcas explained. She'd been completely weirded out by the thought. One was too much to think about, never mind two. "And I think Ed and I have enough on our plates without throwing two kids into it. Had me in a fucking panic. Don't tell Ed. He's fucking worried about me enough, and the doctor says I can't literally eat for two, which is pretty much what I've been doing."

"You are made for it, you know," James said. "The whole child birth thing. Just make sure you're being healthy, and the rest will take care of itself. You can't stress yourself out about it." Which was a stupid thing to say because it was obvious that she was. "Hey, so, what did you expect Ed to say once you left?"

Dorcas shrugged. "I don't know. It's Ed. You've known him longer than me. He's fucking quiet as shit most of the time. I just wondered if he'd said anything at all, never mind taking a rip on Gideon fucking Prewett. Sod," she added fondly.

James grinned. "Sod indeed. Look, are you ready to go back in? We're both soaked. Thanks for that, by the way."

"Any fucking time," Dorcas said, and grinning back. "Uh. Thanks. For coming out I mean."

"I'd say any time, but you know we try to switch off, so," James said, looping an arm around her neck and pulling her back towards the house. "Who knows, maybe next time it'll be Marlene, and you'll have to suck it right the fuck up and listen to her."

"Yeah, fuck you," Dorcas said as the two of them walked back inside. Dorcas threw off her hood and shook out her hair before stomping down the stairs and shouting, "You got PUNK'D!"

James snickered as he walked in behind her, stopping to stand next to Lily. "I am a miracle worker."

Edgar looked a little sheepish. "Um. Do you forgive me for being a complete wanker then?"

"No. I'm breaking up with you," Dorcas said, rolling her eyes exaggeratedly and climbing onto Ed's lap to kiss him. "We're totally fucking over."

"Maybe I'm just a romantic, but something tells me you two are fine," James piped up. "And also, get a room."

***

**Later That Day**

"If we'd taken the bike we wouldn't be sopped through to our fucking bits," Sirius complained. "I'm a careful driver, Moony. Water on the road does not phase me nor my driving skills."

"And a little water or exercise never killed you either, so will you stop complaining?" Remus said, elbowing Sirius in the side. "It's a short walk. It's really not that bad."

"I'm still bloody drenched," Sirius whined as they finally reached the door to their building and got inside. Heading up the stairs they passed the bloke next door, Everett, who said, "Wet, is it chaps?" to which Sirius answered with a playful flipping off.

As soon as they were out of earshot, Remus fought back a smile, arranged his face into a scowl, and asked, "You like his socks better than mine, don't you?"

Confused, Sirius looked back at Remus with a perplexed look on his face and asked, "What the fuck are you on about?"

Remus brushed past Sirius and into their flat (mostly so Sirius wouldn't see him trying not to laugh), calling back loftily, "You said you felt left out about not being able to interchange partners like socks. I just figured..."

"You can't be serious," Sirius blanched, hurrying inside after Remus and shutting the door. "Moony, I was poking fun at Gideon and Marlene. I don't actually want to play wife swap. And what do Everett's socks have to do with anything?"

Remus couldn't help it. He started laughing and turned to reach for Sirius, pulling him in close and leaning to nip at Sirius' ear. "I'm just kidding. Everett is straight anyway. He has a girlfriend. I asked in the elevator once. He does have nice, ah, socks, though."

"You are a cruel man, Remus Lupin," Sirius admonished, though he was smiling and leaning into Remus' touch. "You can't have me thinking I'm in the doghouse all the time, you know. I'll develop a complex."

"Sorry. I thought it was funny. Let me make it up to you," Remus said, biting Sirius' earlobe again, tugging at the skin with his teeth. "You have a couple hours before work, don't you?"

Glancing at his watch over Remus' shoulder, Sirius answered, "Two and a half. Have something in mind, Moony Lupin?"

Deft fingers wasting no time in unbuttoning Sirius' trousers, Remus caught his boyfriend's eye and gave him a wicked look. "Perhaps. Are you interested?"

"Nobody ever believes me when I tell them you're a saucy little minx," Sirius said. "And of course I'm interested. Do I look dead to you?"

"Never," Remus retorted with a laugh and let his hands wander inside Sirius' trousers. Sirius never wore trousers with pants or pants with trousers. It was always either or, and Remus quite liked all the skin. "Quite perky, actually."

"Mr. Wandering Fingers," Sirius said with a gasp as Remus rubbed his thumb against the head of Sirius' now very erect cock. "Are we rutting about on the floor, or would you like to spend these two and a half hours of making it up to me in bed?"

"Bed," Remus answered and pushed Sirius towards the bedroom. "Especially because you said the word 'rutting'. How totally undignified."

"Says the sex fiend stripping me," Sirius teased, although he removed his own clinging, wet shirt, and shook his unbuttoned trousers off of his hips and to the floor. "Christ, I'm wet," he said, not noticing his double entendre.

Remus snickered and began unbuttoning his own shirt. "Who's the girl now?"

"Oh ha ha," Sirius said, rolling his eyes as he started undoing Remus' trousers. "Completely random, out of place question…"

Remus laughed and pulled his wet shirt off his arms, stepping out of his trousers and boxers as soon as Sirius pushed them down. "I don't always make you feel like you're in the dog house, do I? I don't mean to."

"I meant that I had one, but to answer yours, no, you don't," Sirius said, pushing Remus on the bed and crawling on top of him. He kissed the tip of Remus' nose and said, "Can I ask my question now?"

"Yes, yes. Go ahead then," Remus said a little breathlessly and traced his fingertips lightly down Sirius' sides and thighs as far as he could reach before starting his way back up again. "Ask away."

"When we're old and feeble, and in some home somewhere," Sirius started, "Will you still look at me the way you're looking at me now?"

"Yes," Remus answered, tilting his head to kiss Sirius' neck. "Always."


	19. Kiss Kiss Molly's Lips (April 28th, 2007)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Where Kingsley reappears (did you forget about him?), Gideon tries to give his brain a break, and Aidan finally bites the bullet.

As of late Gideon's head had become an overwhelming centre for second-guessing and possible stupidity. For example, he knew perfectly well that Hestia was shagging Aidan Lynch, and had known for a few weeks, but had yet to a) confront Hestia about it or b) break up with her spectacularly. He wasn't going to bother, either, because she'd been becoming "busy with work" more often than not lately anyhow, and the less of her he saw, the less guilty he felt about it.

Then there was Marlene, and their rekindled friendship, or friendship with benefits, because no matter what sort of rules Marlene had set on their first go at it, they were still going at it. Like bunnies. Gideon tactfully refrained from all mentions of love and/or monogamy, and Marlene stayed in his bed, and he willed all the inevitable doom away. He wasn't stupid. He knew perfectly well that one of these days either Stubby was going to find out and have him killed (because he was too big a shit head and coward to do it himself) or Marlene was going to run.

Gideon was also perfectly aware that Fabian, Emmeline and Lily had been taking bets on how long it would last. Bloody nonces.

But, as mentioned, Gideon's head was overwhelmed. When Gideon's head became overwhelmed, Gideon did one of two things. He had sex, or he drank coffee alone. Since sex (or those with whom the sex was being had) was the source of his problems, drinking coffee alone was what Gideon got up at 10 on Saturday morning to do. In fact, he was sitting at the counter in his pyjama pants and his old high school sweatshirt, absorbed in the newspaper, and drinking black coffee when the doorbell behind him dinged and Kingsley Shacklebolt walked in.

Kinglsey hadn't been around Salcombe much since graduation. He went to university in Exeter and lived in the dorms there, enjoying all sorts of new friends and new hobbies. The only people he really kept in touch with were Frank and Alice. He and Frank had been friends for far too long to let it lapse.

He was back for the weekend, though, because it was his parents' 25th wedding anniversary and they were throwing some big barbecue and cocktail party that evening that Kingsley was expected at. The hoity-toity of Salcombe would supposedly all be there, and he knew the Blacks, Potters, Longbottoms, and Malfoys had all been invited. He wasn't sure who all was going to be there for sure, though, but he hoped some people from school would be.

He'd been roped into doing all sorts of errands to help prepare, But Kingsley figured they could wait ten minutes so he could enjoy a real coffee. (His parents had taken to drinking decaffeinated after reading some stupid study on the negative effects of caffeine on the body.)

The small coffee shop was pretty packed, though, and while many tables had one or two extra seats, the only person he recognized was Gideon Prewett. They weren't close by any means--Kingsley had only met him a few times at parties James had thrown--but Kingsley wanted to sit, so he walked up and cleared his throat.

"Good morning, Gideon. Mind if I just take a seat? I won't bother you if you don't want, but there's no room anywhere else," Kingsley explained. "I just need a moment to sit and put off starting the day."

Gideon looked up with surprise. He couldn't remember the last time he'd seen Kingsley Shacklebolt. And Kingsley looked good, too, or at least better than Gideon did straight out of bed and in his lazy clothes. "Right, yeah, no, sit down, mate, how are you?" Gideon asked, smiling slightly. As Kingsley sat down, Gideon was suddenly reminded of the fact that Hestia had dated Kingsley for a long time, and that it hadn't ended on good terms. Well. So much for drinking coffee alone.

"I'm doing well. University's going pretty good. I'm seeing this sweet girl whose parents are both lawyers," Kingsley said with an easy smile, taking a sip of his hot coffee. "What about you? What've you been up to?"

Gideon almost snorted. Where to start? "Eh, same old," he managed with a straight face. "Just, you know. Working, whatever." He took a sip of his coffee. "Being seeing Hestia Jones for a while," he added quietly.

"Hestia? Really?" Kingsley asked, and his expression turned a little wistful. "That's cool. How is she? I haven't seen her in ages."

"Seems all right from what I can tell," Gideon answered with a shrug. "It's complicated. And kind of funny when I think about it."

"Oh," Kingsley said, wishing he was in a position to ask more. "She must be happy. She had it bad for you for a long time, I hear."

Gideon laughed. "Yes, well. She's being having on with someone else since November."

Kingsley looked shocked for a moment, but then chuckled. He figured if Gideon could laugh about it, Kingsley could, and it was a little funny, after all. Hestia probably thought Gid had no idea. "Wow. Well, she always did have a bit of trouble making up her mind. Makes a bloke wonder, you know, if she was having it on with someone else while she was with me, too."

"I doubt she was," Gideon said. "And like I said, it's a complicated sort of thing with Hestia and I... it's not like I'm baby Jesus innocent or anything."

"I don't doubt that, mate," Kingsley said with a grin. "And what makes you think she wasn't? Not that I particularly think she was or anything. You just sounded like you had a reason."

"Well, despite the fact that she's calls you a git every time she talks about you, I always get the impression that she still loves you," Gideon said. "Not in love, but... I'm pretty sure that had you two not broken up when you did you'd still be together. Does that makes sense or am I talking dribble?"

"Yeah, I guess," Kingsley said softly. "We were good together, you know? But, you know. We've both moved on and stuff. There's no point thinking about it. We were good together, but we weren't right."

"Why not, if you don't mind my asking?" Gideon said.

"Why weren't we right?" Kingsley asked, a little shocked by the question. And what a question it was. Kingsley avoided it for the moment by asking, "Well, why aren't you two right?"

"Because we both love other people," Gideon answered, quirking his eyebrow. "What're you implying?"

Kingsley shifted uncomfortably in his seat. Well. That had backfired. "Look, she's a great girl, but she's just not my type, all right?"

"Well she's not a slut," Gideon said, practically. "Certainly not a good reason."

"Says the bloke she's bloody cheating on," Kingsley pointed out, and then felt bad. He didn't believe she was a slut, and he didn't mean to imply he did. He'd thought she was great. It was his parents who'd had the issue. "Look, it's just complicated, all right? It was for the best."

"Well I'm cheating on her so it all evens out," Gideon said, even though coming out of his mouth the words sounded much stupider than he had thought they might. "Which isn't a good point. I only asked because she doesn't know herself. You did break up with her over an answering machine, that much I do know."

"Christ, does everyone know?" Kingsley asked. It had been a rough day, and he'd just had a screaming row with his parents about her. He'd not been at his best, by any means. "My parents hated her, all right? They thought she was trash. I didn't want her to have to deal with that. My parents can be harsh, and they'd been ragging on me for ages to split from her. They wanted me to date a nice, proper girl from the upper crust of society. So I obliged, and I know that makes me a prick, but I didn't do it because I agreed with them. I did it to save her the heartbreak and humiliation. I didn't think we'd last anyway. High school sweethearts never do."

"You'd be surprised," Gideon said thoughtfully.

"Yeah, well," Kingsley said dully. "I can't change it now. And anyway, my parents love my new girlfriend. They think she's perfect, and we get along really well. Why rock the boat now, right? Like I said, we've both moved on."

"Well you should at least tell her why you did it," GIdeon suggested. "Hestia has more than enough problems without thinking she's a slut, or a whore, or whatever else thrown into it. There's things about her I think no one but Emmeline Vance understands."

"Emmeline Vance understands everybody," Kingsley said. "And look, you can tell her if you want, but I think it'd just be messy if I got in touch with her again, you know?"

"Yeah, I understand," Gideon said with a nod. "Sometimes it's just best for everyone to move on. Besides, I'm pretty sure Hestia’s three shakes short of being in love with the other fellow she's shagging. You know Aidan Lynch, don't you?"

"Yeah, a little," Kingsley said and frowned. "So I don't get it. You know she's cheating on you, who with, and since when. Why haven't you done anything about it? Especially if you're into someone else too."

"Well speaking of complicated..." Gideon said, and couldn't help but laugh at himself. Why did it all seem so much funnier when he was explaining it to someone he didn't know all too well? "Let's see... I dated Marlene McKinnon for two and a half years in high school. We broke up for five, got back together again, I proposed, it frightened the shit out of her, and then she started dated Stubby Boardman. I fucked half of Salcombe, and then started dating Hestia. Hestia started shagging Lynch, and then by some incredible stroke of luck, Marlene and I started shagging again. In short, I can't tell Marlene I love her or ask her to leave Stubby, because she'll run. As long as the illusion of us being in relationships with other people exists, then we're not Gid and Kinny like we used to be, we're a new sort of Gid and Kinny who can't hurt one another. Even though we're hurting one another doing this. Christ, my life is shit."

"Wow," Kingsley said, processing it all. "Does Marlene have feelings for you too?"

Gideon nodded. "Oh yeah. We're arse over tits in love with one another."

"That's messed up, man. Good luck with that," Kingsley said, shaking his head. "Hey, Stubby's band is doing a pretty decent tour soon, isn't it? I've heard ads for Hobbled Gordons shows everywhere, and they play that one song of theirs on the radio all the time. It's hard to compete with a rock star. Maybe that's what's tripping Marlene up."

Gideon snorted. "I appreciate the sentiment, but no, trust me, it's not the rockstar bit. It's Marlene, herself."

"I thought you couldn't bring it up with her," Kingsley said, confused. "How do you know? Did you ask her?"

"Nah," Gideon said, taking another sip of his coffee. "Emmeline Vance told me."

"You don't say," Kingsley said with a snort. He'd gotten to know Emmeline a bit when he and Hes had been together, and she was one insightful bird. It was a bit scary sometimes, actually, how right on she usually was about people. Though after Sirius came out of the closet, Hestia hadn't shut up about how Emmeline had been adamant that Sirius wasn't gay. Probably just because it was so shocking that Emmeline had been wrong.

"How things change, hmm?" Gideon mused, smiling as the waitress refilled his cup for the sixth time that morning. "The funnier thing is that some things never do."

"Oh, no thanks," Kingsley said to the waitress as he downed the rest of his coffee. Setting his empty mug down, Kingsley stretched and said to Gideon, "Well, it was good to talk to you, mate, but I'd best be off. I've got a list a mile long to get done for my mother today. See you around?"

"No doubt," Gideon agreed and stuck out his hand to Kingsley. "Take care of yourself."

Kingsley shook Gideon's hand and said, "You too. Good luck with, you know, the whole love square thing you've got going on."

"I'll work on it," Gideon said with a smile, and once Kingsley had left he turned back around to face the counter, and picked up his newspaper.

***

Hestia's hair breezed behind her as Aidan pushed the tire swing again, laughing at her as she called out, "Wheeeeee!" They were killing time at his parent's house, waiting for the lasagne he'd made to cool so they could eat, then curl up and watch the telly together. The sun was setting behind them, and as Aidan pushed again Hestia closed her eyes and swore she could feel the happy pinks and oranges of the dying sunlight melt against her skin.

She twirled back toward him, and opened her eyes. He was looking at her with that _look_ of his, and she smiled happily before teasingly saying, "Your lasagne better be bloody good, Lynch. It's taking _forever_."

"My lasagne is really good, actually," he said, and blushed a little. "My mama taught me the recipe when I was a kid, and a batch I made won an award at a county fair when I was thirteen."

He knew it was good, and that's why he'd made it. He had a couple of important things he wanted to talk to her about tonight, and he wanted it to go well. Which, apparently, required good, home-cooked food. He really _was_ a country boy. He didn't know what someone like Hestia was doing with someone like him.

He pushed her again and Hestia said, "Cocky much, farm boy?" using the nickname she used to poke fun at him whenever he acted adorably country. "And here I was thinking you were trying to butter me into a shag."

"Well, that too," Aidan answered with a lopsided smile, catching the edge of the tire swing and spinning it, sending Hestia twirling away, enjoying the way her long hair flew out behind her as she hung onto the rope and let her head fall back. He just loved her smile. "You're so beautiful, Hestia. Especially when you're happy."

"Flatterer," Hestia said, but her voice was soft.

Now would be a good time to say it, Aidan thought; a good time to finally get those little three words out he'd been working on for so long. It would be almost perfect. There was even a ruddy sunset. He should say it now. Catching the tire swing, Aidan stumbled to bring Hestia to a stop, smiling at her warmly. "Hestia, I..." Damn. Damn. He couldn't say it now. Covering quickly, he finished, "I think we could probably go in and eat now, if you wanted to."

Hestia blinked. "Right," she agreed, hopping out of the swing. "I'm starved," she added, but it was a little forced; she knew perfectly well what he'd intended to say because he'd been trying to get it our for weeks now. She didn't want to say it first. She _couldn't_ say it first. It seemed wrong to her for so many reasons.

"Good. There's a lot of food," Aidan said and took her hand as they walked up to the house. He opened the door for her and asked, "Do you want some beer with dinner? I can grab you a bottle from the cooler."

“Sounds good,” Hestia agreed, and seated herself at the table.

Grabbing a bottle for each of them, Aidan set them down on the table and then used a potholder to bring the lasagne over. He sunk the knife into it to cut huge pieces for both of them and smiled at her as he served hers onto the plates he'd already set out earlier. "You want to eat at the table or on the couch?"

"Here's fine," Hestia said. "I'm a messy eater; I don't want to get sauce all over your mother's cushions."

"Are you kidding? We flip the cushions over and rotate them depending on where the most noticeable stains are so that the afghan will cover the worst ones," Aidan laughed as he sat across from her at the small table. It was one of the sort you could make bigger or smaller by adding inserts, but Aidan had taken them out. His parents and two younger sisters were gone for the weekend camping, so the table didn't exactly need to be as big as usual. Sometimes his big sister came in for Sunday dinners, too, so there were often at least six or seven people. Since it was just him and Hestia tonight, Aidan had downsized.

"Really? Shows how much I pay attention. You lot are good at hiding them." Hestia took a forkful of lasagne and blew on it to cool it down a little more before sticking it in her mouth. "Oooh!" he said thickly through her food before swallowing. "Oh _Aidan_ , this is _wonderful_!"

"Told you," he said proudly, cheeks turning a little pink again. Figuring if he couldn't broach topic one on his list to cover tonight, he might as well move on to topic two. Which was almost as scary. "So, you know how a few weeks ago I realized that Greg, the bastard, was never going to give me anything other than the farm report?"

Hestia smiled wryly, "Yes, I recall that particular epiphany. Why?"

"Well, I started asking around about any opportunities other stations might have opening up," Aidan said slowly. "Anyway, one of my professors recommended me to a friend of his, and I got a job offer for a regular weekend spot working midnight to two, Friday and Saturday both. I have a couple days to get back to them, though."

"That's great!" Hestia said immediately, but then realization dawned and she knitted her eyebrows together as she processed the information. "Wait, so... you won't be coming here on the weekends anymore?"

"Well. I haven't accepted it yet," Aidan said tentatively. "I thought... maybe..." Where's that calm courage now, Aidan? Come on, old boy! "I thought you might want to look for a job in Kingsbridge. I thought maybe... you might like to get a flat with me. Or I can just come back during the day one day a weekend. It's only an hours drive. No pressure. It's just a suggestion. I really don't mind making the drive. The farm report was bollocks anyway. I come mostly just to see you."

"You want to live together? I mean... a place of our own?" Hestia asked, completely taken off-guard. She'd entirely forgotten about her lasagne. " _Really_?"

Aidan nodded, and then added weakly, "No pressure?"

Hestia laughed. "Aidan... That's an _amazing_ idea!" she answered, dutifully ignoring the Gideon Issue. "But. Are you sure you want to put up with my shit on a full-time basis?" There were so many things she'd have to take care of if they were to do this and she wanted to make sure that Aidan was seriously serious with this kind of commitment. If he was... if they were in this for the long haul, then she knew she could pull up her big girl panties and be completely honest with Gideon without Aidan having to know.

"Yeah. Yes," Aidan said, the fear cracking enough to let a smile through. "I do. I daydreamed about doing laundry with you the other day, when I first came up with this idea. I couldn't decide who I thought would be better at ironing. I bet we're both total rubbish and would rather just wear things wrinkled, right?"

"Most likely yes," Hestia answered, smiling widely at him. "At least you're a decent cook, though. We wouldn't have to live off of take-away."

"My mother would never have had that!" Aidan said with a laugh. "Just because I'm the only boy in the family didn't mean I didn't have to learn just like my sisters did." Smiling, Aidan asked tentatively, "So, what do you think? You want to, uh, have a go at living together? I mean. It wouldn't be right away, of course. I have to give notice at the place I'm at now and all."

"That depends," Hestia said, biting her lip. "You have to answer a question for me."

"Sure," Aidan answered. "I mean, I bet we'll both have lots of questions for each other. Like, 'how long are your showers' and 'you don't have any secret soap opera addictions that will interrupt any important footie games'. But you go ahead with yours."

"Is this... I mean, if we move in together, um," Hestia started, having a little trouble phrasing what it was she was trying to ask. "Is it going to be a short term thing, for kicks, or... Aidan, are we in this for, you know... the whole kit and caboodle? Because, I mean, I've had guys in the past who've made a lot of empty promises about the long-term and the future and all that, and I know we're still young, but... do you see us lasting? Like. Can you picture us married, having a family? That sort of thing?"

Okay, so he had another chance to say it. Another good moment. Right now. He could just... _Hestia, I love you_. That's all he'd have to say. "Well. I don't know what to expect from the future, really. I know I'd never lead you on, and I'd never jerk you around. I'd never lie to you or hurt you or leave you. I can't imagine not being with you. So, yeah. I guess. I can see us five years down the road, or ten."

 _Coward_ , Aidan berated himself. How was it that he could say those other things, but he couldn't just tell her how he felt? She deserved to know. He _wanted_ to tell her. Just... he'd never said it to a girlfriend before, and the last time one had said it to him, he couldn't say it back because he didn't mean it, and she'd broken up with him. He just... wanted it to be perfect.

Well. That was good enough for her, at least for now. He couldn't imagine not being with her... that certainly meant a lot and made her heart beat a little faster in her chest. The colour rose in her cheeks and she was smiling again. "I'm usually about twenty minutes in the shower," she said. "And I don't get off on the soaps. I'd much rather watch footie. Unless you like the soaps? Because if you do, Aidan, I'm not even going to _explain_ why I find it funny, I'm just going to laugh at you."

Aidan burst out into a wide grin. "So that's a yes? I can tell the two lugs I live with that I'm moving out, and accept the late night spot?"

Hestia nodded. "Yes. Yeah, yes. I'd love to."

"Cool. So. We should plan for the first or fifteenth of June then, depending on what we can find?" Aidan asked, finally stuffing the first bite of his (now semi-cooled) lasagne into his mouth. "I can start looking for places, and maybe you can stay at mine one weekend so we can go look at some."

"That sounds good. So it looks like I've got to find myself a new job, hmm?" Hestia said, pleased that she had at least a month to work up the balls to talk to Gideon. Not that it even felt like they were in a relationship; they hadn't shagged in _ages_. "And begging old furniture off of relatives?"

"We can try to get one that's furnished, if that's easier," Aidan said. "I've got a kitchen table, a couple chairs, and a pretty decent double bed. Well. Assuming you want to share. We could get a two bedroom if you wanted."

Hestia quirked her eyebrows. "Oh, so you want to be flatmates, not a couple?" she asked, smirking. "I mean, I know I kick, but it isn't as though we haven't slept in the same bed together before."

"Hey, I'm just trying not to step on any toes here!" Aidan said with a laugh, holding his hands up in the 'I surrender' position and not noticing as he flung a bit of food off of his fork, sending it in the general direction of the sink behind him. "I don't want to just be flatmates. I love sleeping with you. And I don't just mean shagging, before you say it."

"You know me too well," Hestia countered, realizing that her full plate of lasagne was still sitting in front of her, relatively untouched. "I guess I wasn't as hungry as I thought I was," she offered with a shrug. "You distracted me from wanting to eat with your sexy talk of ironing and kitchen tables."

"Come on, let's take the rest of this into the den. We'll see if there's a footie match on the telly and munch while we watch," Aidan said, grinning. His plate was hardly touched either. "I'll clean up later."

"A man after my own heart," Hestia said, batting her eyelashes obnoxiously. "Footie and dirty dishes. What a flat we'll have."

"It'll be ours, and that's all that matters," Aidan said, getting to his feet, plate in hand. He paused to tug her out of her seat too, kissing her quickly as soon as she was standing, and then heading out of the kitchen. "So long as there's nothing mouldy."

Hestia winced. "That won't be a problem. I have this thing about mould..." she shuddered. "I at least rinse my plates before I let them lie around." She followed Aidan into the living room and seated herself comfortably on the couch as he turned on the telly and flicked through the channels. She took a few more bites of lasagne before he found the right station and settled back, allowing her to nestle in the crook of his arm.

"I know I always say I could get used to this, but I guess now it's finally okay if I _do_ ," Aidan said softly. "Considering soon we'll be able to do this every night, if we want to."

"You romantic sop," Hestia said happily, taking another bite of her lasagne before setting the plate on the coffee table. They watched the game in silence, Hestia absently stroking Aidan's thigh, until a commercial for make-up came on and Hestia huffed and rolled her eyes. "See, how ridiculous is that. You can practically see her baby factory in that skirt, and I don't know what the shade of her lipstick has to do with that weird camera angle directed at her thighs. Will Lethal Cherry Lip Shine make my thighs more attractive?"

Aidan snorted. "Baby factory?"

"Well I could've been completely inappropriate and said she's showcasing her cunt to the world with the aid of a snakeskin printed mini-skirt, but I didn't want to offend your delicate sensibilities," Hestia said, her tone playful. A similar commercial featuring a blond in a pleather mini-dress came on and Hestia huffed again and said, "Most women do not diddle around like cross-dressing hookers. Honestly, if that woman stuck out her pelvis any more she'd grow a cock."

Aidan burst out laughing and pressed a kiss to the crown of Hestia's head. "I love you, even if you do make me blush."

"You. What?" Hestia asked, angling her head and looking at him with her eyes sparkling. Had he even noticed he'd said it?

Aidan sucked in a breath suddenly in shock, freezing. He hadn't even thought about it. It had just slipped out, as though natural and mundane from being said every day, except it wasn't because he'd never once said it. "Christ. Sorry. I've been trying to figure out how to say it for ages, and I didn't mean to just blurt it out. But I do love you."

Hestia's face lit up, and despite her bravado and generally non-girly nature, tears started welling up her eyes for no reason. She's known he'd been trying to say it, but why now, when he finally did say it, did it make her turn into a mushy, emotional lump. "I love you, too," she sniffled, the tears running down her cheeks now. "Ugh, I guess the estrogren finally started kicking in after nineteen years."

"Why are you crying?" Aidan asked, sounding terrified. "And what do I do to make it stop? Christ, don't cry. I hate it when girls cry. All my sisters have used it against me for years."

"I'm sorry," Hestia said, but couldn't seem to turn off the water works. "I've just... no one's ever said that to me and meant it before, at least not someone who wasn't legally obligated."

"Hey, come on," Aidan said helplessly, setting his fork down on his plate, which was balanced on the corner of the end table. Hand freed, he reached over and wiped the tears from her face. "If I say it over and over will that help?"

Hestia laughed. "You can say it as many times as you like, I'll never get tired of hearing it," she answered.

"I love you," he said again, the foreign words feeling a little odd coming out, but at the same time they seemed to belong there on Aidan's lips when he was speaking to Hestia. "I love you even when you're crying on my jumper over an accidental I love you. But I really do wish you'd stop crying. Me loving you is supposed to be a good thing."

"They're happy tears," Hestia said. "And it's not a good thing, it's a fantastic, over-the-moon, _amazing_ thing, and I love you even though you're frightened to death that you broke me because I'm crying."

Aidan laughed. "If you ever tell my mates about this conversation, they'll disown me as their friend."

"Lies!" Hestia announced, re-situating herself so that she was straddling Aidan's lap and resting her forehead against his. "If Sirius Black hasn't shed tears in Remus Lupin's presence, I'll eat a pair of your dirty socks, not to mention how Edgar fawns over Dorcas like she's bloody Venus, and well Davy... Davy's just a strange bloke, I'm going to be honest here."

"Mm," Aidan said, tilting his head up to kiss Hestia. "And suddenly I don't care about anyone except the beautiful, smart, wonderful woman in my lap. Not that I'm not sure you're right, but do you really expect me to focus on boring old Black or Bones or Gudgeon with you straddling me? Not likely."

"Smart man, this man I love and who loves me," Hestia said, suckling on one of Aidan's earlobes. "What're you planning to do about me, hmm, taking over your lap like this?" She wiggled her hips and kissed his neck.

"Well, that just there made my brain short circuit, so probably just sit here until it reboots again and I remember I ought to be doing _something_ with my hands," Aidan said, and then Hestia shifted on his lap again and tugged his earlobe between her teeth. His hands went to her hips instinctively and he moaned, "Nnngh."

"That's a good start," Hestia said, her fingers unbuttoning his shirt as she leaned forward and kissed him. "Next move?"

"Ah, bedroom? Not sure if I could stand doing it on my grandmother's afghan," Aidan said, and made a face. Moving his hands down to Hestia's arse and tightening his grip, he stood suddenly, taking her with him. "Here, let me."

"My big, strong farm boy," Hestia said, her legs locked around him. She put her hands in his hair and made a trail of kisses along his neck.

"Yes, well, big, strong farm boy is going to get distracted and run into a wall any moment now," Aidan grunted, smiling all the while. He stepped through the threshold of his old bedroom, dropping Hestia as gently as possible onto the bed. "Now. It's your move, isn't it?"

Hestia grinned. "We're both not nearly naked enough," she said, undoing the last few buttons and pushing his shirt off of his shoulders. "God, you've got such a hot chest. I'm never going to get over all the country boy muscle."

Aidan grinned and flexed, quipping, "And it's all yours," before sitting down next to her and snaking a hand up under her shirt, looking right into her eyes. "I love you, Hes."

Hestia bit her lip and beamed and said, "I love you, too, Aidan. So much."

***

Hestia ran quickly down the basement stairs to grab her purse; she was going to lunch with Fabian (who'd been annoyingly nice and acting rather weird lately) to kill an afternoon since Emmeline was out of town with her father, Gideon was working, and she herself had a day off. She'd been planning to surprise Aidan by driving into Kingsbridge to see him, but her parents wouldn't let her take the car, and she hated buses, and he was probably in class anyhow, so she rang Fay instead.

She'd come into the basement first off then once they got going she'd realized she left her purse sitting on top of the telly. Running back into the room she pulled Gideon's street jacket off the railing by accident, sending the pocket's contents flying across the floor.

"Buggering shit," she muttered and started collecting the items (a broken watch, a lighter, some movie stubs, a couple of sticks of gum, etc) and stuffing them back into the pockets. Next to a pack of matches from the Three Drumsticks (honestly, how much shit did he keep in his jacket?), she was surprised to put her hands on a ring box. "What the...?" she asked herself, opening the thing, and gasped when a princess cut, diamond engagement ring stared back at her.

There was no way. No bloody way. Gideon couldn't possibly...

She swallowed hard and quickly shoved all the contents of Gid's pockets back in, including the box, and tossed the thing in the corner where the railing met the wall. She stood and paced and glanced nervously at the heap, running her hands wildly through her hair, only distracted from her insane thoughts when Fabian called down the stairs, asking if she'd dug a hole in the cement to bury her purse in and was having trouble getting it out again.

God. No. No, no. Gideon Prewett couldn't ask her to marry him. So bad. So very bad.

She grabbed her purse and calmed herself with some deep breathing before heading back up the stairs, willing herself to save the information to observe later, and develop a new course of breaking-up action.


	20. Back to Zero (May 1st-7th, 2007)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Where Hestia loses her cool, Fabian loses a few hours off of his work day, and Gideon and Marlene do the Right Thing.

It was a sweet feeling, standing there with a band behind him and a crowd of adoring fans before him, a microphone grazing his lips, a guitar hot beneath his fingers. It was exactly what Stubby had always wanted, except he still wanted more. He wanted bigger venues and more frantic fans. He wanted groupies to cry out how much they loved him and blokes to fawn over him and memorize his songs and style their hair like his. He wanted to need a security team every time he went out. He wanted _more_. He wanted Marlene to be there to see it all, to see how famous he already was, how famous he was going to be. He wanted her to see how much better he was than Gideon fucking Prewett. He wanted to be the most important person in her life. He wanted her to fucking drop everything for him, not to drop him for everything else.

What kind of girlfriend ditched out on a tour to stay home and work and hang out with her ex-boyfriend? She was stupid if she thought Stubby didn't know.

"This next song is something everyone can relate to," Stubby said slowly, his voice booming through the speakers and rolling over the crowd, row by row as he began to pick out the opening of the song as he spoke. "Everyone's had at least one person screw them totally over. Everyone's been blown off by some twat who didn't know a great thing when they had it. This song is for all those people who dated people that were unfaithful or unfair or undeserving. That's right, everyone. It's time for She's a Nobody, Nobody to Me. And _fuck you, Marlene McKinnon_."

***

Gideon had his feet propped up on the coffee table and leafed through the newspaper idly as Marlene stuck an old VHS tape of cartoons they recorded a million years ago into the VCR. In the Arts & Entertainment section an article about the Hobbled Gordons caught his eye, and as he read his eyes got wider and wider. Marlene plopped down next to him and Gideon said, "Uh. You're in the paper, Marlene."

"I am? What for?" Marlene asked, leaning casually into Gideon's space. She rested her chin against his shoulder and scanned the page before him. Some renowned jazz pianist had played his last concert, and the Hobbled Gordons had performed, blah blah whatever. As she kept reading, though, she couldn't help but frown. "What the fuck? Listen to this! 'To cap off a great show, Boardman commented about ex-girlfriend Marlene McKinnon before singing 'She's a Nobody, Nobody to Me', which apparently inspired six female fans to follow the band back to their hotel room. Emilie Walraven, 19, said, "Well, if he's single now, he's fair game! Not that it would've stopped me before, mind, but I figure I've actually got a shot now. It didn't happen last night, but I'll keep trying." Walraven has tickets to three other concerts on the Gordons Go Big tour.' Fucking bull shit. So far as I'm concerned, we're still dating until he calls me to break it off. The bastard. You know, he hasn't spoken to me since he came over after that flu passed and I told him I wasn't going on tour?"

"Really?" Gideon questioned, trying not to sound pleased. "Well if he's looking for groupies I suppose he's going about it the right way."

"He just misses me, that's all," Marlene said with a sigh. "He was so mad and betrayed when I told him I wasn't going. He didn't get that I have things going on here that I didn't want to leave. ...Do you think I should've gone?"

"No," Gideon answered honestly, not trusting himself to say anything else.

"Well, you wouldn't," Marlene said, rolling her eyes and grinning at Gideon. "Selfish prick. Just kidding."

"Well it's true. I want you here," Gideon said. "I want to spend time with you. We can't if you're off with Stubby."

"True," Marlene replied absently. Things with Gideon were weird. She felt better than she had in months--years, almost--now that they were hanging out again, but she wasn't quite sure what to make of the situation. Sure, they slept together occasionally (which she vowed not to do again every time it happened, and she was quickly coming to accept that she just couldn't control herself), but they were both dating other people so it didn't really mean anything. At the same time, though, she was ditching Stubby more and more often (or rather, Stubby had been ignoring her for weeks, but she hardly even noticed as she spent practically all her spare time with Gideon), which meant Gid was spending less time with Hestia too, since he was always with Marlene. But it was normal to spend a lot of time together at first, considering they'd missed each other so much when they'd been on bad terms. Right? "Hey Gid, do you think we spend _too_ much time together?"

"Too much?" Gideon looked over at her, smiling slightly. "Marlene... I hardly feel like there's _enough_ time to spend with you." In truth he'd rearranged his work availability to be able to spend time with her whenever she wasn't busy herself. Fabian had been doing more than his fair share where the Order was concerned because Gideon had been ditching his duties in favour of Marlene, and he didn't spend his spare time with anyone else. She dominated his life, but he felt he _had_ to let her do it for fear of losing her. He wanted to hold onto her as long as he could.

"Well, yeah, I am pretty great," Marlene answered with a smirk. "Oh, I forgot! I got you something."

She leaned across him for her work bag (she'd spent the night at Gideon's, and planned yesterday to go straight to work from his place). Pulling out a small book, she handed it to him. "It was in the bargain bin at that bookstore by my bus stop. I got it a couple days ago."

"'Marketing Yourself as an Actor'," Gideon read, grinning. "Is that supposed to be a hint?"

"Just thought it might come in handy," Marlene said, smiling at him. "There's a chapter on how important it is to take classes and go to auditions. I bookmarked it for you. _That's_ supposed to be a hint. Mostly it's about networking and getting an agent and making sure your agent is working for you the way they should be and all that. Useful stuff, I thought."

"No doubt," Gideon said, and pulled Marlene tight to his side to kiss her forehead.

"So you like it, right? How ever are you going to thank me?" Marlene asked teasingly. And damn, there she was angling for sex again, but it wasn't her fault because Stubby wasn't around and a girl had needs. Giving in to the inevitable, Marlene tacked on, "Because if you don't know, then I have a few ideas."

Gideon grinned. "What ever happened to your no sex rule, Kinny?"

"I got horny;" Marlene answered bluntly, and then pulled away from Gideon a little. "If you're going to be uppity about it, though..."

"Hey, hey," Gideon said, laughing. "Who's uppity? I'm not uppity. In fact, I'm very sombre and horny myself, and completely at your mercy."

"I thought so," Marlene said, and then got up out of her chair, walking backwards towards Gideon's bedroom, pulling her shirt up her torso teasingly. "Come on then."

***

Hestia had not yet decided how to break it off with Gideon. She'd only gotten so far as promising herself that she at least owed it to Gideon to spare him the heartbreak of her turning down his proposal. So, if it seemed like he was going to pop the question, she was going to go first.

Other than that, she had no idea. She just needed a little more time to let it all stew and come up with a plan of action.

"Gid, are you here?" Hestia called, letting herself into the basement. "It was unlocked. I just brought your jacket back. You left it at my place. I can't really stay, though. Are you here or am I talking to myself like a crazy girl?"

Gideon was there. But so was Marlene.

In his room he hastily pulled on some shorts and a t-shirt and called, "Yeah, hold on a mo'!" listening intently for the sound of running water, indicating that Marlene was still in the shower and couldn't hear either of them. This was bad. This was bad, bad, bad.

Sighing and heading into the hallway Gideon guessed it was as good a time as any.

"Hey," Hestia greeted him, leaning in and pressing a somewhat perfunctory kiss to his cheek while her brain screamed for her to treat him more like her boyfriend than her cousin lest she get herself found out. "You look sexy. Were you just wanking or something?"

Gideon scratched the back of his head, willing the colour to stay out of his cheeks. "Uh, something like that," he said. "So. How've you been lately?"

"Good. Fine. Just normal," Hestia said, as if falling in love were good, fine, _or_ normal, and not spectacular and... well. Not the point. "You?"

"Busy, I guess. I don't feel like I've seen you much." Gideon wished he could just grow some fucking balls already and be done with this. They were leading one another on. He knew about Aidan and she should know about Marlene. It was fair, right? Why were they still dancing around this?

"Yeah. Sorry. Just, work, you know? I've been really busy," Hestia said awkwardly. "Well, and so have you. With... whatever." With what? What had he said he'd been busy with all that week? Had Hestia even _asked_? God, she was a bad girlfriend. "So like I said, I can't really stay long. I've got to head up to the station and talk to Greg before he goes on his lunch break."

"Why?" Gideon asked, curious. They'd become total, and complete strangers, somehow. It was ridiculous. Really and truly ridiculous.

"Oh. Uh. I'm quitting," Hestia said, blinking. "I'm going to look for... somewhere else. Figured I'd put my two weeks in sooner rather than later."

"Quitting? Why?" Gideon asked. "You never told me you'd even been thinking about it."

"Long story," Hestia said hesitantly. "I'm actually thinking of moving. I mean, bloody hell, I still live with my parents. But you know. I don't want to keep you from your wanking. Call me later? It'd be nice to hang out a bit. We're practically strangers."

Bollocks, Gideon. You have them, so use them. "Actually, speaking of that Hes," Gideon stammered, and felt his heart start to beat faster as he heard the water in the bathroom stop running. "I have to talk to you about something."

Oh no. Oh _fuck_. He wasn't. "If it's... Look, Gideon, I think I ought to go first..."

"It'll only take a minute, Hes, it's really important," Gideon insisted. "Just hear me out. I mean. This is hard to say, although it shouldn't make anything difference, but we've..."

"Gideon, don't," Hestia interrupted. "Seriously. I can't... I have to... Oh hell. Okay, look..."

"No, no, let me," Gideon interjected. "I really need to say this. It's been haunting me for the last month, and I just... I need to be straight with you."

"Gideon, I won't marry you!" Hestia finally snapped, and then clapped a hand over her mouth, eyes dipping down to stare at the pocket of Gideon's jacket where she'd draped it over a chair. She looked back up at him guiltily. Well. That was about the opposite of what she'd been trying to do. After lowering her hand a little, she cleared her throat and added, "I, um. I'm sorry. God, I'm so sorry."

Gideon stared back at her with a completely shocked expression on his face. "What are. You. Marry me? Hestia, where'd you get _that_ idea?"

"There's... there's a ring. In your coat pocket. I found it a few days a..." Hestia trailed off mid-word as the bathroom door opened and Marlene McKinnon stepped out in nothing but a towel, pulling Gideon's brush through her hair.

Marlene froze as soon as she saw Hestia and after a moment of seriously debating returning to the loo and locking herself in, she turned red and looked down. "Thanks for the warning, Gideon. Prick."

A very uncomfortable silence settled on the three of them and they just kind of stood there staring between each other until Gideon said, finally, "I bought that ring a long time ago. I bought it for, um. Marlene. She turned me down then, but I still keep it in my pocket. Uh. Well. This is what I was trying to tell you," he added, gesturing jerkily to Marlene.

"I can see that," Hestia answered, chewing on her lip. She wasn't hurt, because she had no right to be, really... but _Jesus Christ_ what a mess they'd made between them. "Um. Hi, Marlene."

"Hi," Marlene said slowly, pulling her towel more tightly around her. She figured she ought to just leave and let them hash it out, but Gideon's words registered and she shot him an incredulous look. "You _kept_ it? Sentimental freak."

Gideon rubbed his eyes with his hands and muttered, " _Really_ not the time, Marlene."

"Sorry," Marlene said. "Um. Carry on. I'm just going to go wait in the bathroom."

"Hes... I'm. I'm sorry you had to find out like that," Gideon said as Marlene went back into the loo. "But. It. We weren't..."

Hestia blinked at him and then shook her head. "No, Gid, it's fine. It's a messed up situation, but it's fine. I've been, um. Seeing Aidan Lynch. We're sort of. Well. I was trying to figure out how to dump you."

"Yeah, I knew about that," Gideon admitted.

"You what?" Hestia just stared at him. "Why didn't you bloody say anything?"

That was a good question. Gideon wondered if Marlene was listening to them, even though she'd left the room. "I was--and am still--afraid that, if we broke up, or break up, or whatever, that... that Marlene would stop seeing me again."

"Oh," Hestia said slowly, frowning. That made no sense. Or, rather, it made a strange sort of sense based on everything Gideon had told her before she and Gideon had started dating. After they'd started dating, they'd stopped talking quite so much after a while. "Okay. Well. Sorry, but we have to break up. I'm moving to Kingsbridge to be with Aidan."

"Oh. Well. Congratulations," Gideon said. "And I'm sorry things went... you know," he offered. "I could've done to put a little more effort in."

"It's okay. I'm not your type," Hestia said with a shrug. It stung a little, but only in that way that her pride was smarting. Not in any real sort of way. "I wanted to be, but even if you weren't so arse over tits for Marlene, I think we'd still not have been quite right. Anyway, I only really put the effort in until I found someone else, so I think that probably makes me just as bad, if not worse."

"I think we both kept a dead thing going for far too long," Gideon said. "But thank you, Hestia. For trying, at least."

"Yeah, well. I don't think I ought to accept thanks for cheating on you and falling in love with another bloke in the meantime," Hestia said with a wry smile. "But good luck with Marlene. You're going to need it."

Gideon nodded and swallowed. "Bye Hes. Don't be a stranger."

"I won't. We're good as friends," Hestia said with a smile. That had actually gone a lot better than she'd anticipated. "See you around, Gid."

Gideon watched her leave with mixed feelings and a lot of dread because that meant Marlene was going to come out of the bathroom, there was likely going to be some yelling between them, and then she was going to leave. No matter how desperately he fought against it, she was going to run. It was inevitable. It made him so _angry_. Sitting on the arm of his favourite chair he called to Marlene, "She's gone," trying to mask his apprehension.

Marlene cracked the door, peering through just to make sure, and then stepped out, staring at Gideon. Leaning against the door frame, she exhaled a breath noisily and then said, "You kept it."

Looking up at her, Gideon said, "Yes."

"Why?" Marlene asked. "And don't make shit up, okay? Just tell me."

"Because I thought that maybe, if I kept it, I could use it again," Gideon answered. "That we'd get back to where we were, and you'd marry me, and we'd have kids together and the whole nine yards."

"God, Gideon," Marlene moaned and let her head fall back against the wall. "How many times are we going to do this?"

"You tell me, Marlene," Gideon answered, his voice deflated. "Because here we are again. You asked, I answered."

Marlene turned her head to look at him. "I don't know if I could live without you, you know that?"

"Then don't?" Gideon suggested. "Not that it matters, really, because you're just going to debate this with yourself the same way as before, and you're going to leave again. And it'll all be hanging there, and in five years we'll be having this conversation again because we _can't live without one another_."

"I don't know if I can take five more years of this," Marlene said. "I'm tired, Gid. And you scare me."

Gideon actually laughed. "Why--please enlighten me--do I scare you?"

"Don't laugh at me," Marlene snapped, sliding into a sitting position and tugging her towel ineffectually down before deciding she didn't care what was hanging out at the moment. Gid had seen it all anyway. "Because you hurt me last time, and if that ever happened again... but whatever happened before, I just don't think running is worth it anymore. I meant what I said at the hospital. I miss you. Being with you these last few weeks, I don't think I've felt happier since bloody high school. Kind of makes me think it's worth the risk, you know?"

"So what are you saying, exactly?" Gideon asked, carefully. "Do you trust me enough to stay with me?"

Marlene dropped her face into her hands. Why was it so hard to give in to this when it was what she wanted most in the world? And after the whole episode at the hospital, would he even believe her if she did? Would he just know that she meant it the same way that he'd just known last time that she hadn't?

"I trust you," she said, and finally let go of all the baggage she'd been clinging to for years. It wasn't really huge. It didn't make her want to cry or throw up or burst into song. She just sort of sat up straighter and tilted her head at Gideon, looking surprised. "I trust you. That was easy. Ooh, and it felt good. Hey Gideon? I trust you."

Gideon's mouth went dry, and he looked hard at her, completely still, his heart pounding in his chest. He'd so miserably fucked up the wonderful thing they'd had, and now here they both were, 26 years old, a decade later, and she was giving it back to him. He was getting her back. She was _his_.

He nearly fell off the chair in a mad rush for the jacket Hestia'd dropped off earlier.

With the box in his hand he crawled toward her, panting slightly, opening it to show the same, simple engagement band he'd offered her years before. "I. Marlene," he started, and then cleared his throat. "Marry me?"

Marlene blinked at him, and then grinned. "Can we have exactly the kind of wedding that will drive our parents mad?"

Gideon grinned back, relief spreading across his face. "You mean bugger off to Berlin, and say fuck the pomp and circumstance?"

"Berlin would be perfect," Marlene said breathlessly, grinning widely at Gideon.

"So that's a yes?" Gideon asked.

"It's a yes," Marlene answered, taking the ring and putting it on her finger. "Oh hell, that feels good too. Make a deal with me. No more hang ups over the past bullshit we've put ourselves through. No bringing it up in fights or wishing we could change it. Let's just live in the now."

Gideon couldn't help it. He started crying. He pulled her into a tight, bone-crushing hug and sobbed and laughed against her naked shoulder. "I love you," he said, his voice cracking. "Christ, I love you."

"I love you too, you wet idiot, but promise me!" Marlene squealed as her towel began to slip. "And let your fiancé breath, Gideon. Death by strangulation is not sexy."

"I promise!" Gideon said, pulling back. "I'll promise anything you like, fiancé of mine."

Smiling wickedly, Marlene responded, "Okay. Promise me we can be married by a glittered up drag queen."

Gideon snorted. "If that's what you want, I promise," he said.

Marlene just rolled her eyes and then reached up to push some hair out of Gideon's face, smile fading as her expression deepened to something more intense. "Do you realize the day all this started, I was wearing nothing but a towel, just like now?"

"So you were," Gideon recalled, leaning his head close to hers. "You called me a pervert and I pulled it off of you."

"Pervert," Marlene whispered, leaning back on her elbows and looking up at him with love, happiness, and a spark of adventure in her eyes.

Gideon tugged at her already loose towel. "You're back, Kinny," he said, hoping she'd understand.

"I'm back," Marlene agreed, feeling like the sort of girl that could throw a radish at a Hummer again. "Is the fact that you and I aren't quite you or I without each other going to bother you?"

"No," Gideon said. "So long as we stay you and I. We can take on the world."

"And we will, now that we're together again," Marlene said brightly. "Starting with America."

***

The phone rang and Gideon bounced on the balls of his feet as he waited for Fabian to answer. Marlene had gone over to her place long enough to pack a bag; Gideon had his own ready to go and needed Fabian to _come home now_ so that they could kidnap Caradoc and play witness in Berlin to Gideon and Marlene's wedding. _Shit_ and holy _hell_ he was going to get married!

"My break isn't for another forty minutes. You couldn't have waited?" Fabian answered, knowing it was Gideon and knowing that if he'd called Fay's cell during work, it must be at least a little important. Not that Fay ever really got in trouble for breaking the rules.   
"Such impatience."

"I'm getting married," Gideon blurted, breathlessly.

"Right now? To who?" Fabian asked, and then added curiously, "Are you high?"

"No!" Gideon exclaimed excitedly. "Naturally high, maybe, but Fabian! Fabian, Hestia came over and we finally ended things and Marlene was there and we _talked_ things _out_ and she's going to _marry me_!"

"You're serious," Fabian deadpanned, then grinned. "And here I thought you were just being stupid. Silly me. _When_ , Gideon?"

"Now. Leaving. You have to leave work," Gideon said. "We're going to Berlin."

"Oh my."

***

"I do," Gideon answered, grinning at Marlene harder than he'd ever grinned before in his life. It had taken what felt like a million years to get out of Salcombe, never mind to Berlin, and now here there were sliding gold bands (Gideon had essentially emptied his savings account on this trip) on to one another's fingers.

"I do too," Marlene replied, grinning.

"What are you waiting for than?" asked a tall drag queen dressed head to toe in purple. "It is time for kissing!"

Marlene laughed and grabbed Gideon by the shirt collar, pulling him in and pressing her lips to his before opening her mouth and making it a _real_ kiss. Around them, Fabian, Caradoc, their 'minister', and a few other men and women decorated in various amounts of glitter and fake breasts began to catcall the happy couple.

Gideon's hands slid into Marlene's hair and his heart felt filled to burst. Pulling away breathlessly they laughed at one another, and Gideon asked, "So how does it feel to be Mrs. Prewett?"

"I'm not too sure, but being Mrs. McKinnon-Prewett feels _bloody amazing_ ," Marlene replied, grinning giddily and wrapping her arms around his neck before going in for another kiss. "And we need to celebrate!"

"Yes, yes, we do," Gideon agreed. "How do you want to celebrate, Mrs. McKinnon-Prewett?" She was his wife! His _wife_!

"I think we ought to celebrate the best way we know how," Marlene said, and then turned to face the drag queen who'd wed them. "Do you know where we can get some marijuana around here?"

"Come on, you old married couple. Let's not get arrested on your wedding night," Fabian interjected, though the purple sparkly queen looked more amused than anything. "Besides, I'm sure you'll find adequate partying supplies in the van. Oh, and congratulations! You do realize that our parents are going to kill you both?"

"Mum just loves lavish things, she'll get over it when she finds out Marlene is her new daughter-in-law," Gideon answered.

Caradoc grinned. "Fabian, I think Lily Potter owes you and Emmeline five pounds."

"And I'll feel no guilt in taking it, either. Honestly, who thinks they know my brother better than me?" Fabian asked, rolling his eyes. "Even you can only withstand him for so long, sister-in-law."

"Oh my god, we're in-laws!" Marlene said, and then burst out into hysterical laughter.

Gideon groaned. "How many I-Told-You-So's do you think we're going to get? Really?"

"Loads," Marlene said with a snort, and then her eyes go wide. "Oh fuck. I haven't broken up with Stubby yet!"

***

**A Few Days Later**

Dale was stretched out across the dressing room sofa, flipping through one of the many newspapers they received on a daily basis. Whenever there was even a brief mention of the band, the paper or magazine or whatever, was slipped under the door, or stuffed in the mailbox of the hotel room they were sharing. In the end, Emmeline did the collecting; she cut out of the articles to paste together a scrapbook for later, and recycled whatever was leftover.

Only he and Leroy actually read the articles; Stubby was too absorbed in himself (even Dale could admit that, and he didn't know the bloke _that_ well yet), and Ben didn't have the ability to sit still long enough to read something. Now they were in a dressing room, an hour away from their next venue performance, and the four of them (five including Emmeline) were sat around, passing the time.

He skimmed the article--same rubbish really, about them hitting high on the charts, and selling out shows, and taking the United Kingdom by storm--until 'Marlene McKinnon-Prewett' caught his eye and he had to shake his head to make sure he wasn't reading it wrong. "Oh Stubs, man," he said, glancing over at Stubby with apprehension. "Dude, you're not going to like _this_."

"What is it?" Stubby asked from his position sitting upside down in a chair and fiddling with an acoustic guitar. He looked up long enough to realize Dale was talking about an article, and said, "Read it to me."

"Here, Em," Dale said, handing the paper to her with raised eyebrows. "He won't hit you for it, since you're a bird."

Emmeline took the paper calmly, found the article and started to read from the spot Dale pointed out. “The Hobbled Gordons might be the hot-rising act in the United Kingdom right now, but leader singer and guitarist Stubby Boardman might want to learn to keep his hot-rising temper in check. Last week Boardman sent out an F-You to then girlfriend Marlene McKinnon in the middle of a set in London, dedicating a song about a lying, cheating bird to her with much anger and spitting. We caught up with McKinnon in her and Boardman’s hometown, Salcombe. She asks that we now call her Marlene McKinnon-Prewett?” Emmeline questioned what she was reading and stopped, looking it over again.

“What the fuck are they talking about?” Stubby asked suddenly, sitting upright and looking at Emmeline with an angry expression. “What the _fuck_ do they mean, McKinnon-Prewett?”

Emmeline was trying not to smile herself, but continued reading. “This past weekend McKinnon eloped to Berlin with childhood sweetheart Gideon Prewett, a former close pal of Boardman and band mate Leroy Toggles. We’ve learned exclusively that McKinnon-Prewett and Prewett rekindled their romance nearly a month ago. ‘Stubby, selfish prat that he is, can kiss my married, uninterested-in-him arse,’ said McKinnon-Prewett. ‘Good luck and good riddance.’ Continued on A3.” Emmeline flipped through the section, and couldn’t help but laugh out loud when she found the rest of the story. She turned the page around to show everyone.

A picture was included with the last part of the article (which detailed Marlene, Gideon and Stubby’s history together, essentially) that featured Marlene and Gideon kissing happily, Marlene with her middle finger in front of the camera.

Dale, Ben and Leroy bit their tongues.

Stubby snapped. “That. Fucking. _Bitch_!” he screamed, hopping to his feet and smashing the guitar in his hands against the floor. “She can't get married! She's my fucking girlfriend!"

“Uh, was, actually,” Emmeline countered, smiling wryly. It was about time the two of them came to their senses. “She’s Gideon’s wife now, I’m afraid.”

Stubby, no longer able to articulate his anger with words, picked up his chair and shattered it against the wall.


	21. Mine For Me (May 14th, 2007)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Where there is so much talk about sex it's mind-boggling, a LOT of alcohol, and a group of very in love (and very insane) people.

***

"I wanna rock and roll all night, and party every day!" Marlene shouted along to the stereo, laughing and playing air guitar along with Gideon, head-banging together, coming dangerously close on every beat to smashing foreheads.

They were both smiling and happy and carefree while Arthur and Molly helped prepare for the party, having split the kids up and sent them to the two sets of grandparents for the night. In theme for their Congratulations To Us on Shacking Up party, Gideon and Marlene had dressed the part. Marlene was wearing white in the form of ripped, eighties-esque white-washed jeans, a white tube top almost long enough to be a dress, a lacy garter around her neck as a choker, and a headband with the sparkly word 'BRIDE' forming the crown while Gid donned a tuxedo t-shirt with tacky tails hanging off a top hat reading 'GROOM'.

The family gathering had been the night before, and this was the party Gideon and Marlene were excited for. Their friends were all coming over soon for a barbecue--which Arthur was outside starting already--to celebrate the occasion, though Gid and Kinny had begun their own celebrations a little early with a few glasses of cheap champagne. They were both feeling quite loose and groovy as they danced around Molly and Arthur's living room to a mix CD Gideon had made Marlene years ago.

"Ooh, I love this one!" Marlene squealed as Sweet Child Of Mine came on. "Gid, do the high part!"

Gideon laughed and obliged; it was good to be this way again and he still hadn't gotten over the fact that it had all come together like this. That they were married. Gideon didn't feel old or sad anymore. Instead he felt excited to wake up in the morning, next to his wife, next to Marlene, and it was almost as though they hadn't aged at all. Instead they'd just picked up where they'd really left off the day they'd graduated from high school, acting completely ridiculous all the time, and arse over tits in love with one another.

After a beat Gideon caught Marlene around the waist and started dancing her around the furniture to Guns N Roses.

Marlene giggled madly as they danced, falling backwards after a moment and throwing her arms out, letting his arms around her waist be the only thing keeping her from crashing to the ground.

"Not that I'm not happy for them, but they're like this _all the time_ ," Fabian mock-complained to Caradoc from the entryway they'd just stepped into, fresh from work. "Can I sleep over tonight to escape them? I need lots and lots of distraction in the form of hot sex. Oh, and hello you two. Molly called. Said you were drunk already. What fabulous hosts you are."

"We're not drunk," Gideon said with mock-indignance, dipping Marlene and grinning at his brother. "We're just very, very happy. This has nothing to do with the champagne we had at two, or the Guiness we've been drinking since four."

"Or that fruit smoothie I made us half an hour ago with six ounces of vodka in it," Marlene added brightly, smiling at Fabian and Caradoc from her upside down position. "Welcome to the Congratulations To Us on Shacking Up soiree. I'd offer to take your coats, but I don't want to and you two are practically hosts too, so you can do it yourselves."

"When are people going to start to show up?" Fabian asked, kicking off his shoes and heading in the vague direction of the kitchen for a snack and to see if Molly needed any help.

"Soon enough," Gideon answered, spinning Marlene around and dipping her again.

"Your hats are very becoming," Caradoc mused. "Very classy. I especially like your streamers, Gid."

"Why thank you, Caradoc, old chap," Gideon replied with a grin, tossing said streamers with one hand, twirling Marlene with the other. "We did want to look fetching for our big party." There was a knock at the door then, and surprised, Gideon pulled Marlene to it with a, "We should greet our guests properly," and then threw it open to reveal Edgar and the noticibly pregnant Dorcas who both looked Gideon and Marlene up and down and burst out laughing.

"'I told you so' doesn't quite work," Edgar said, handing Gideon a card. "So I'll settle for 'About bloody time'."

"Fuck me, you two look like tossers," Dorcas teased, leaning forward to flick Marlene's crown. "Bit fucking girly for you, innit?"

"I'm a bride," Marlene said happily in response, and Dorcas rolled her eyes.

"Hey, can I help myself to the cold cuts? I'm starved," Fabian called from the kitchen, his head inside the fridge. "Hardly got any lunch today. The phones were ringing off the hook."

"Yes, go ahead!" Gideon called back as he and Marlene stepped aside to let Ed and Dorcas in. "What're you at, knocking on doors anyhow?

Edgar shrugged. "Can't say as we've ever been upstairs before." 

"Yeah. You lot kept us all shoved away in the basement, fuckers," Dor said, peering around at walls covered in framed artwork that was obviously done by the children. She took in the box of toys packed away in the corner and the covers over all the electrical plug-ins. "Nice place. Where do you buy those plastic things? Can kids really electrocute themselves if you don't have them?"

Fabian snickered. She was in Mommy Mode already.

"Don't fucking laugh at me," Dorcas said, but she was smiling. "The thought of my kid frying itself by sticking a finger in an outlet is fucking scary."

Edgar wrapped an arm around Dorcas' shoulders and said, "Mum already has them around for Susan, although we should put some in the basement. Dad and I nearly have the storage room finished now, for the nursery," he added proudly.

"God, I couldn't imagine having children now," Marlene said, and then looked over at Gideon. "Hey Gid? I don't want kids for a couple of years, at least. Is that okay, hubby?"

"Fine by me, _wifey_ ," Gideon agreed. "I'm in no rush."

Before the conversation could continue, Marlene's eyes widened and she grinned, grabbing Gideon by the hips and pushing him closer to the speakers, shaking her butt as she began to dance like an idiot again. "I get up in the evening and I ain't got nothing to say. I come home in the morning, and I go to bed feeling the same way... Remember, Gid? This song was playing the first time I swallowed!"

Fabian came back into the room having apparently satisfied his urge to snack and snorted at Marlene's comment. "Shameless hussy. Where's Molly? I figured she'd be helping prepare."

"She ran to the store," Gideon answered, laughing and blushing from Marlene's comment, but still dancing. "You can't start a fire without a spark, this gun's for hire even if we're just dancing in the dark!"

"Don't quit your day job, Gideon Prewett," Lily Potter said as she came through the door no one had closed after Ed and Dor had come inside. "You sing like a dying cat."

"H'lo!" James called, following her in, arms full of booze and a gift, complete with fancy gift wrapping. Lily had started the wrapping job, but James had called suggestions out over her shoulder until she'd gotten tired of it and told him to do it himself, at which point pride intervened and he'd spent nearly hour making it look fancy. "We brought a present! It's a waffle maker, and it's regifted from our wedding since we've not yet used it. Don't mind, do you? Only the party was such short notice."

"At least you're honest," Gideon replied with a laugh, taking the gift from James. "And personally I love waffles, and that's one contraption Molly doesn't own. So it'll go to use."

"Do be careful unwrapping lest you offend James' delicate sensibilities," Lily said, giving her husband a teasing look. "I'll have you know he spent a good hour fawning over it like a goose."

"You didn't think I could do a nice job!" James protested. "I had to prove you wrong. It's nice, right?"

"Yes, it's very nice," Marlene said with a grin, moving to stand in front of Gideon, leaning back into him comfortably, the sudden urge to dance passing. "Good bows."

James smiled proudly. "Took me ages."

"Well, we didn't bring a gift," Dorcas said, breaking her uncharacteristic silence, smiling comfortably. "All you get are well wishes and congratulations, and if that's not enough, than fuck you. Oh, and there's a card somewhere. Did you bring it, Bonesie?"

"I already gave it to Gideon," Edgar answered.

"Oh, hadn't noticed," Dorcas said flippantly.

The group of them stood in silence for a few moments before Lily smirked and said, "Well? I was under the impression that we were celebrating something rather monumental. Get over here! Hugs and congratulations!"

Marlene laughed and moved towards Lily, wrapping her arms around the younger woman and bouncing on the balls of her feet excitedly. "I'm married, I'm married, I'm married!"

"You are, you are, you are!" Lily replied with a giggle and said, "I'm quite pleased, I really am. James and I have been dreadfully worried about you two since we watched our wedding DVD."

Gideon, mid-shaking James' hand, furrowed his eyebrows and asked, "Why?" 

"Stubby was manning the camera for the first dance once the other couples started joining, and it picked up your conversation," James admitted to Gideon. "We've known for ages you proposed to her and McKinnon turned you down. It was shocking, really. We had no idea anything had even gone on between you. Kept it close to your chest, did you?"

"I can't believe it," Fabian broke in before his brother could respond. "You knew before I did. Gideon, I don't know if I shall ever forgive you for not telling me."

Gideon shrugged sheepishly. "It was there if you really looked for it, I guess. We certainly didn't hide it while we were in school."

"All right, I've got a box full of liquor compliments of Horrace P. Peters, a set of silk sheets from your favourite poofter friends, and much dedication toward getting smashed!" Sirius announced, coming through the door with said box in his arms and Remus at his heels. "Where are Mr. and Mrs. fucking Prewett?"

"Right here!" Marlene called, waving brightly at him. "Hello, Sirius! Remus. How're you both?"

"Very well, thanks," Remus answered, and held out a card. "The receipt is in there too, in case you think _silk sheets_ are a little impractical."

"I take it the gift was Black's idea," Dorcas said with a chuckle. She liked Remus a lot more now that she knew he wasn't spineless. Not that she hadn't liked him before, but Sirius was a hard person to stand up to or walk out on, she suspected. Had to respect a bloke who could.

"I think Sirius believes silk sheets to be the only gift worth giving," Caradoc commented. "He and Remus gave Fabian a set for his birthday."

"And I'll bet the two of you have made good bloody use of them, too," Sirius grinned unabashedly. "Everyone loves a nice set of silk sheets."

"We got them for _our_ wedding, too," Lily added. "And Remus said the exact same thing to us. But we've enjoyed them, haven't we James?"

"Indeed we have," James said with a grin, waggling his eyebrows and moving to set the bottle of wine and various other drinks they'd brought down onto the kitchen table. "Though, from what I've heard, the set they gave you, Fabian, was more a replacement than a gift."

Remus blinked, and promptly turned scarlet. "James, don't be ridiculous."

Fay raised his eyebrows curiously. "Well now. Do explain. Sirius, mate? Come on, we all know you like to talk."

"The first time Remus and I shagged it was on your bed that time we housesat for you," Sirius explained in a bored voice, as though commenting on the weather.

"Really?" Fabian asked with a laugh as Remus hid his face in Sirius' shoulder.

"I'm so sorry," Remus mumbled. "We washed the sheets, I swear."

"It's fine. I'm all about supporting gay sex, and my bed has good mojo," Fabian said with a grin, waiving his hand dismissively through the air before his face turned curious. "Can I ask, though, did you use my lube, or bring your own? Just curious."

Remus ducked half behind Sirius and refused to look at anyone, which was answer enough.

"I'm a little fucking impressed at your nerve," Dorcas said with a snort.

"We did buy more," Sirius said pointedly, smiling broadly.

"Who _hasn't_ had sex in our basement?" Gideon asked, to which Lily and James quickly raised their hands. Gideon raised his eyebrows at Edgar and Dorcas.

"We nipped in the loo once," Edgar said with a shrug. "Dorcas is insatiable."

"And also fucking pregnant, big surprise," Dorcas pointed out with a smirk. Then, teasing, turned to Ed and said, "Thanks a _lot_."

"You're welcome, Princess," Edgar said, and kissed her forehead as everyone in the room except Fabian questioned, "Princess?" Edgar winced. He'd forgotten that only Fabian knew about that.

"Fucker," Dorcas said and pushed Ed away, making her way through the room and flopping onto the couch. "I gave you one fucking condition on that nickname, and you've blown that _twice_."

"Seriously though," Marlene said, following Dor into the living room and perching slightly unsteadily on the arm of Arthur's armchair, waiting for Gid to sit down so she could slide into his lap. "You don't really strike me as the princess-y sort."

"Oh, I don't know," Sirius commented grinning, sitting on the floor. "She's high and mighty and likes to get her own way."

"She thinks she knows everything," Gideon teased, falling into Arthur's armchair and pulling Marlene into his lap, wrapping his arms around her tightly.

"Now, now, behave, all of you," Lily scolded. "I think it's cute. Why do you call her princess, Edgar?"

"Ha ha everyone," Dorcas sneered, and then blinked and looked up at Ed as Lily's question sunk in. "Yeah, why do you? You've never said."

Rubbing the back of his neck and blushing a little he said, "Ah. Well. Before we started dating and I was crushing on you, I sort of thought of you as this unattainable thing. And, you know. I worshipped you and doted on you, and still do... really. So. Yeah. Princess."

"Hey Edgar, your bollocks called," Sirius said. "They told me you left them in 2005 and were wondering when you were coming back to get them."

Dorcas threw a couch pillow at Sirius and made a face. "Shut the fuck up, you asshole. That was fucking adorable."

"Girl's got a point," Fabian agreed and reached over to pat Edgar's cheek. "Eddie is pretty damn cute."

"Don't touch my boyfriend or I'll touch yours," Dorcas said, winking to show she wasn't serious. "In naughty places."

"Rape!" Caradoc mock-screamed. "Save me!"

Edgar slid onto the couch next to Dorcas and said, "You really think so? I honestly expected you to say something similar to what Sirius said."

"Well, I probably would have, except he fucking beat me to it," Dorcas said. "No one's allowed to rag on you for shit they think is awesome except me, anyway. Because shut up, Sirius, you totally did fucking think it was awesome. Bet you're going to go home and write it in your fucking girly diary and save it until you can figure out how to use it on Remus somehow."

"Hey, now, I don't need to take tips on charm from Edgar fucking Bones," Sirius argued. "Hey, James, remember that time in grade school, at break, when he asked Lottie Price out with a poem and she got her brothers to throw him over Mercy Bridge on his way home from school?"

"Lottie Price was a cunt," Edgar muttered.

Dorcas' eyes widened in shock for a moment before narrowing in anger. "You never told me that. Who the fuck is Lottie Price, anyway?"

"She moved away in like, eighth grade or something," James said. "Don't bother planning revenge. But she really was a cunt. Don't know what you saw in her, Bones. Apparently you like them rough and tumble."

"Hey!" Dorcas protested.

"That's not what I meant," James said hastily. "I just meant, you have a lot of spunk to you. So did Lottie, even if she was a twat about it."

"Twat is right, I ended up with pneumonia," Edgar said. "She got her point across, having me thrown over a ruddy bridge in February. Ma screamed so loud over the phone at Lottie's mum that she ended up with a sore throat herself."

"I hate to break up the nostalgia, but isn't this Marlene and Gideon's party?" Lily asked. "Shouldn't we be berating them with questions instead of revisiting the lost loves of Edgar's past?"

"Too right!" Marlene said, though she'd just been content to sit there with Gideon's arms around her. In fact, she'd almost forgotten they were there to celebrate Gideon and Marlene's marriage. Not because she wasn't excited for it, but because it all felt so natural and right that she had to continue reminding herself it was a _big deal_. "Focus on us, please. And we have, rather sadly, not consumed alcohol in almost an hour. Hey mister bartender, want to mix us up something good?"

"If you're talking to Sirius, you'd best be more specific, else he can hand out some pretty deadly drinks," Remus said, speaking from experience.

"Indeed I can, including a few that'll have you smashed to the floor in 20 minutes," Sirius said, digging through the box of booze Horrace had given him to bring. "How about some sissy martini's to start and we'll work into the hard shit? I can make you a virgin that'll taste just as good, Dor."

"Me too, actually," Edgar said.

Most everyone else nodded in agreement with martini's as starters, non-alcoholic for the parents-to-be and soaped up for everyone else. As Sirius headed to the kitchen with the booze, Lily said, "So. Explain yourselves. How on _Earth_ did you end up in Berlin with drag queens?"

Marlene laughed. "We just sort of picked Berlin, then he made the mistake of telling me he'd promise anything I asked, and it was the most outrageous thing to pop to mind. Besides, you should've seen my mother's face when I showed her the photos."

Fay snorted in agreement. "It was pretty priceless."

"You misunderstand my question," Lily said. "How'd you even end up deciding to get married?"

"Oh," Gideon said. "Well. It's a long story..."

"The sex is really good. Fogged our minds," Marlene joked. "Seriously though, it just got to the point where neither of us had any reasons not to. We'd run out of excuses and just decided to stop making ourselves miserable."

"And by that, Marlene means she came to her bloody senses, that's what," Fabian piped up.

"Hey!" Marlene protested, still smiling happily, however. "He dumped me first, I'll have you all know. What's that phrase? Once burned, twice shy? Anyway. I also made him promise that we'd forget the past and live in the now, so we've let it go. No pointing fingers allowed."

Gideon kissed Marlene's neck and said, "I just had to get her to trust me again. I bollocksed it up when I proposed to her the first time because we'd just gotten back together and well... I gave her an ultimatum."

"With a proposal?" Caradoc asked, confused.

"Well I frightened the shit out of her and she was running away, so I told her if she left, we were done. Big mistake."

"We both made mistakes. It's all sorted now though," Marlene said, smoothing her hands along Gideon's arms where they were around her waist. "Now we just have to sit back and enjoy married bliss until the arguing starts."

"Are you going to go on a honeymoon?" Remus asked. "Or move in together or anything?"

"Marlene's moved into the basement for now, and we're going to save up," Gideon said. "Next year... we're going to move to America."

"America? Why America?" Lily asked.

"And what about the Order?" Edgar questioned. "Are you going to keep it going long distance or will it be disbanding?"

"To LA, actually. Gid's going to try to get into acting, and I'm going to get my PDT and maybe even my cave diving license," Marlene said. "And I don't know about the Order. Maybe Fabian will take over?"

Fay smiled and shrugged rather than answering. Honestly, the Order was something he and Gid did. If Gid wasn't involved, Fabian wasn't sure he wanted to do it on his own. Besides, he was thinking about maybe moving to Los Angeles too. The only thing keeping him in Salcombe, really, was Caradoc, and he hoped Caradoc would come with him, though he hadn't yet suggested it to his boyfriend. There was time, still, and he wasn't sure if they were at the moving in together stage yet.

"I'm no expert, but that doesn't really look too promising," Remus said with a wry smile in Fay's direction.

"You can't fucking disband," Dorcas said, frowning. "It isn't just some stupid group anymore. It's way bigger than that."

"The Order is mine and Fabian's together," Gideon said. "I don't think it would be the Order without the Prewett brothers running the show. Besides, Dorcas, we can't do it forever. We can't spend the rest of our lives fighting against Riddle or whomever else. We have to move on."

"That's true, I suppose," Lily said. "As our families and careers get bigger we're going to have less and less time for this. I only hope that we can... well, that we can still be friends. After everything."

"Of course we will," Fabian said, smiling brightly and deciding to ignore the issue of a spy that they still knew was out there, even if things had seemingly settled down the past couple of weeks. "As we've said time and time again, the Order, especially the core, has become family. Family is forever." As Sirius re-entered the room with a couple drinks, Fay amended, "Well. Usually. _This_ family is, I hope."

"And look at the bright side," James spoke up. "If we ever want to go to LA, we've got somewhere to crash. What flavour are those, Sirius? They almost look _green_."

"These are appletini's," Sirius said, handing them out. "They're so girly they pretty much have pussies of their own, but I have been watching Scrubs reruns on the American channels and haven't been able to get the idea out of my head."

There was a knock at the door then and since he was already standing, Sirius answered it. "Emmeline! Leroy! Aren't you supposed to be in London?"

"Like we'd miss this, and Leroy's just skipping a few radio shows. They have three nights with no gigs, we just have to be back in London in time to travel to the next place," Emmeline said, coming into the room and heading straight for Gideon and Marlene, smile wide across her face. She leaned in and hugged them both as she began to speak. "Congratulations! I had the honours of reading that lovely article to Stubby yesterday, you know. He broke a guitar and a chair and then disappeared. You probably ought to call him. I know he's not gunning for any sort of Good Samaritan award any time soon, but he's still a person."

"He broke a guitar and a chair?" Gideon questioned. "Well then. He took it better than we thought he would."

"I think I would've paid to see his reaction," Sirius said. "He's always been one for dramatics."

"He was dramatic all right, and honestly, the rest of us burst out laughing the moment he left the room," Leroy said. "Ben and Dale send their best, by the way. Stubby told me to tell you both you go fuck yourselves."

"Yeah, already got that memo thanks to a gaggle of reporters following me around the other day," Marlene replied, rolling her eyes. "It was a good picture with the article though, wasn't it? I thought it came out well. My mother was really embarrassed, and my dad framed it and put it on the wall of his flat. He was really excited for us, oddly enough. He always liked Gid. Lord knows _why_."

"You're such a brat," Fabian said with a grin. "How's the tour going so far, Emmeline?"

"Great! They're really blowing up. I've gotten loads of great photos," Em said brightly. "They used this one I took of Leroy in a bass guitar magazine as a full page. Stubby was quite pissy about it, even though he doesn't play bass guitar."

"He likes to be the centre of attention," Leroy said, seating himself in a chair. "And by the way, you're going to have to explain this to me. You two 'rekindled' your 'romance' a month ago?"

"Something to that effect. And we owe it all to Emmeline here, and Starter for Ten. Which we never saw the end of, by the way," Gideon said.

"Oh, I knew you'd like that movie," Emmeline said with a grin. "Has anyone else seen it?"

"Lily and I went a week or two ago," Remus said. "It was quite good."

"I definitely see why you picked it," Gideon said. "The parrallells were uncanny."

"Do you two want drinks?" Sirius asked Emmeline and Leroy. "Appletini's?"

"I'll drink whatever you're making," Leroy answered.

Molly bustled through the door then with a few grocery bags in her arms and Gideon and Fabian automatically hopped to their feet to help her. "Honestly, the line at the market was _ridiculous_! And that old codger has upped his prices on naturally grown produce again. If he keeps it up I'm going to have to go to the Super Save on the highway. Hello, everyone!"

"Hey Molly!" Marlene said brightly, repositioning herself in the chair without Gideon. She always thought it was so cute how close Gideon and Fabian were with Molly, and the lenths they went to in order to make her life easier. Not that she didn't help them, too, because she did. Marlene just loved the family dynamic of the Prewetts. It made her want siblings.

"Are the boys out with Arthur?" Emmeline asked.

"Nah. Arthur's out back fighting with the barbecue and the kids have gone to their grandparents' houses," Marlene answered.

"We figured everyone was looking to drink a little too much tonight so we sent the kids on their way," Molly said. "And I love my brood but I must say, it's nice to be in the company of adults for a stretch. Dorcas, dear, how's that baby of yours coming along?"

"Fine. Healthy. I'm a little bigger than I ought to be so the doctor put me on a bit of a diet. Which fucking sucks. You'd think being pregnant would at least mean you could eat whatever you wanted, but _no_ ," Dorcas complained. "It just means I'm _fat_ and I had to quit smoking and I get to drinking fucking virgin appletinis. Which are actually pretty good, thanks Sirius."

"You big whiny baby," Marlene said, rolling her eyes. "You love being pregnant, don't lie. I see you checking out your belly in every reflective surface you pass. Doesn't she, Ed?"

"That she does," Edgar agreed, smiling. "And ma's been making her materity shirts, and she poses in the mirror with them on all the time."

"I thought when you were pregnant you were supposed to be eating for two?" Caradoc asked.

"Common myth," Molly explained. "You should eat what you'd normally eat, and exercise to keep the baby nice and healthy. And I should know after the lot I've incubated. Speaking of, Marlene, dear sister-in-law, when are you and Gideon going to give me some nieces and nephews? I think I've given you plenty."

"Oh, don't you start! We've got your parents and my mother already pushing us," Marlene laughed. "It won't be for a few years at least."

"Well, whenever you decide to start, you have to have two extras to make up for the kids I _won't_ be having," Fabian teased. "Maybe even three. I'll let you know."

"Well, you can play auntie to Harry," James offered. "And all the others we plan on having. A dozen more, at least."

"Don't get ahead of yourself, James Potter," Lily said. "I swear he just wants his own footie team."

"A noble ambition!" Sirius declared, coming back from the kitchen and handing off drinks to Emmeline and Leroy. "And everyone around here is just fascinated with babies aren't they? We finally get Lily, Alice and Narcissa out of the way and Dorcas here has to go get herself knocked up to fill in the gap. Who'll be next I wonder?"

"Probably Remus, the way you two go at it," Edgar said, laughing. "Keep it up and you'll find a way to trick nature into giving Rem a womb."

"Other way around. I top more often than he does," Remus said casually, and then froze and looked down at his only half empty drink. He hated it when alcohol snuck up on him. Giving Sirius a look, he tried to remain dignified despite his red cheeks as he added, "I swear, you always make mine three times as strong. Please strike that last comment from the record."

"You know, Sirius is always telling me you're a minx," James said with a grin. "I always tell him he's full of it, but maybe he's not entirely."

"I am not full of it, even slightly," Sirius said. "I swear, one of these days I'm going to set up a secret camera at our flat just to prove to you all that most days we can't even get through the front door and keep our clothes on. And that," he said, pointing at Remus, "Instigates more than 90% of it, I swear to baby Jesus."

"It's always the quiet ones you have to keep your eye on," Lily said. "And while I wouldn't _dare_ tell my dearest friend's secrets, Remus has told me a few stories that might back up Sirius' claims."

"Like what?" Dorcas asked curiously, looking at Remus consideringly.

Remus leaned back and sipped his drink. He knew there was no point trying to derail them now, and the only thing that might help the situation was more alcohol. Though he did shoot Lily a slightly betrayed look.

"Oh, buck up, Remus. You know we love to talk about sex," James said flippantly. "Back at school, I walked in a few times. Shocking, I tell you. But I bet Lily has all the really good details."

Lily bit her lip. "He convinced Sirius to have a shag on their little balcony once," she said. "And shush Remus, on the grand scale of naughty things you've done, that barely registers."

"It took a lot of convincing, too," Sirius said. "He bugged me about it for _days_."

"No comment," Remus muttered, and then changed his mind. "Traitors. And Sirius is the one that has an account at Garden of Eden, not me."

"Which makes you totally innocent, I'm sure," Dorcas said with a snort. "I bet you're just too fucking scared to go in yourself so you make him get everything."

"Oh, leave him alone. He's going to pop blood vessels in his face if he blushes any more," Marlene said with a laugh.

"He orders things off the internet to compensate," Sirius said. "Beneath the corduroy trousers and sweater vests there lurks a kinky, kinky bloke."

"We really are preoccupied with sex, aren't we?" Edgar said thoughtfully. "And look at the situations it gets us into. Weddings and babies and the retelling of sexual escapades."

"Oh, back on our favourite topic, are we?" Fabian asked with a smile as he and Gideon walked back into the room after helping Molly put the groceries away. Settling next to Caradoc, Fay put a hand on his boyfriend's thigh and looked around eagerly. "Who's the victim this time?"

"Remus," James answered. "We're talking about how secretly kinky he is because he let slip that he tops most of the time."

"Hey, what happened with Hestia?" Dorcas asked suddenly, turning to Gideon. "How'd she take getting dumped mere days before your fucking wedding?" 

Settling back into the chair with Marlene again, Gideon said, "If it weren't for Hestia, we wouldn't be married right now."

"Really?" Sirius questioned.

"Really. She came over with my jacket while Marlene was taking a shower, and I tried to end things to her and she blurted out that she didn't want to marry me. Turns out she found the ring I'd bought for Marlene... and that I still kept in my jacket, and thought I was going to propose. Then Marlene came out of the loo in a towel."

"She's getting pretty serious with Aidan, apparently," Marlene said. Because of course she'd been eavesdropping. "They're going to move in together."

"And he has no clue about Gideon and her, does he?" Remus asked, pained. It wasn't his place of course, and he'd never interfere, but the whole situation just bothered him.

"Not unless Hestia's told him," Gideon said. "And I doubt she will. I can't imagine him sticking it out knowing that."

Edgar frowned. Aidan was his best friend outside of the Order and it had been really hard to keep things from him for so long. "I've never seen him so happy. He's over the moon enamoured with her, and thinks she's the greatest thing since sliced bread."

"You probably should've ended it sooner, Gideon," Caradoc commented sadly.

"And Hestia should've too," Marlene said defensively. "It's on both of them, not just Gideon."

"Okay, okay. Pull back your fangs, girl. I'm sure that's not what Cara meant," Fabian interjected. "Anyway, what's done is done. Hopefully it'll work out for everyone."

"Secrets don't do anyone any good, not secrets like that anyway," Sirius said. "How long you think before Riddle hears that you two've gotten hitched?"

"He probably already knows," Gideon said. He hadn't given it much thought, but he guessed that it would probabaly make the old coot giggle with delight.

"Not that it matters, really," Fabian said with a bright smile. "We can't live our entire lives around him anyway, so we might as well just do what makes us happy."

"And hope he doesn't find some way to fucking squash it, the cunt," Dorcas said with foul sneer. "Speaking of, have you lot done that fucking super spy shit yet? Where Lupin was going to try and break into the VDM computers from inside?"

"Big mouth," Gideon said, looking at Leroy, who grinned lopsidedly and stuck his fingers in his ears.

"La la la, I'm not listening!" he hummed.

Gideon laughed and rolled his eyes. "Anyway. Sirius and James drew up something resembling the plan of attack for a footie game, but Remus was sensible enough to actually do a little research and has a plan of action. So, since we're here; when's good for you, gents?"

"No working tonight!" Marlene protested and shot the others looks that just dared them to contradict her while she covered Gideon's mouth with one hand. "I'm the bride, and I say no working. Just partying. That was a good drink, Sirius. Can I have another?"

"Anything for the bride," Sirius obliged, standing and heading back to the kitchen.

Remus smiled and said, "No work then. And I'll have another too. When are the others due to show up? Or... who else is coming?"

"Alice and Frank were invited," Gideon said. "And Hestia, who said she might bring Aidan."

"Sirius Black, you heathen, stop spinning me around!" Molly said from the kitchen as Sirius waltzed her around the table. "You rascal, stop it!"

"The sooner you acknowledge our love for one another, Molly dearest, and leave that wretched husband of yours, the sooner we can live happy and free in Fiji!" Sirius sang, grinning like a madman. "Come on, woman! Shake your groove thang! Bon Jovi did not record 'Bad Medicine' for you to mash potatoes to!"

"Leave the poor woman alone!" Remus called good-naturedly from his seat. "And Molly, if he pinches your arse, be a dear and don't tell Arthur. I'm quite attached to the man, tart that he is."

"I am too sexy to die, Molly" Sirius said, and did just as Remus had predicted, pinching her bum.

"And the burgers are cooking!" Arthur called as he slid the sliding door open proudly, stepping in with a warm, oblivious smile. "Hello, everyone! Glad to see you could make it!"

"Hey Art," Fabian said with a grin. "Better get in the kitchen and save your wife from Sirius' advances. I hear he's a tart. Best be worried."

"Well now, I don't suppose I ought," Art said with a chuckle, making his way to the kitchen nonetheless. "Sirius is otherwise engaged and I just know how much Molly loves me, don't I, Mollywobbles?"

"Mollywobbles?" Dorcas snorted, never one to be subtle. "Really, that's what you call her?"

"You can't say much, Princess!" Sirius called from the kitchen, where he had let Molly get back to her potatoes while he made more drinks.

"Bugger off, pillow-biter," Dorcas returned with a casual roll of her eyes and an easy smile, ignoring Fabian's disapproving look at her name-calling.

"Not a good term to use when there's four of us here, Dorcas," Caradoc mused, rubbing the back of Fabian's neck.

"I only bite half of my pillow!" Sirius said, coming back into the room with a tray of drinks. "When did I get humped into the purely gay category?"

"When you shacked up for good with a bloke, maybe," James replied.

"Knock knock!" Alice suddenly called as she stuck her head in the room. "Hello everyone! My, it's good to see you! We've been missing you since we stopped coming to meetings."

"Alice!" Lily exclaimed, hopping out of her seat and running toward the other woman, throwing her arms around Alice and pulling her into a tight hug. "Ooomph, I've _missed_ you! I've haven't seen you since February, for goodness' sake. Did you and Frank move to the moon?"

"No, but Alice's dad's been keeping her occupied with the new job," Frank said, coming in behind his wife wife a giftbox in his hands. "We regifted a toaster oven. Hope you need one."

"Lily!" Alice squealed, returning the embrace enthusiastically. "I've missed you so much! You'll have to bring Harry over soon. We can both coo over how big our boys are getting!"

"I _love_ toaster ovens," Marlene said brightly, pushing herself to her feet and then weaving towards them, a little unsteady on her feet with the new drink and a half on top of the old alcohol. "Shit, it is _good_ to see you two."

Laughing at Marlene's obvious intoxication, Alice pulled away from Lily to squeeze Marlene in a tight hug. "Sorry, sorry! We won't keep away so long next time. Just look at all we've missed! I didn't even know you two were seeing each other, let alone serious enough to get _married_. Congratulations!"

"It's actually a long and interesting story," Edgar chimed in.

"And we rather got married on a whim," Gideon added, standing to shake Frank's hand and taking the toaster over. "And thanks for this, really. Billy and Charlie decided to use Molly's old toaster oven as a rocket ship one day and threw it off the shed. I've been missing my mini pizzas."

"Oh, yes. They're terribly handy," Alice agreed. "We got three for our wedding, but I wouldn't let Frankie return any of them. I figured that'd be a little bit rude."

"You are too polite sometimes, Alice," Emmeline said, getting up and hugging her friend as well. "Good to see you again. You look great."

"Em!" Alice said, surprised to see the girl. "What are you doing here? I thought you and Leroy were on--Leroy! You're here too! What about the tour? Nothing's happened, has it? Has Stubby overdosed again?"

"I wouldn't be totally shocked to hear it," Leroy said. "But no. He ran away after he found out about Gid and Marlene; last time I spoke with Ben and Dale they still hadn't tracked him down. But we weren't going to miss _this_ , and I'm not missing any gigs, so it's no biggie."

"I bet Stubby'll disagree once he hears about it though," Sirius said. "He's more dramatic than I am."

"I can't believe you fucking _left_ , you selfish shits! You're not serious enough about this band. You think I'm just going to carry you along to fame if you're not putting in the fucking time, well I don't think so! You don't want to piss me off, Roy. This band _needs_ me!" Marlene imitated in a low voice, trying not to laugh. "Oh, sorry, is it not on to mock the ex-boyfriend at the wedding party?"

"Well, you know this lot doesn't care about appropriate, and personally, I thought it was a pretty good approximation," Emmeline said with a smile. "But there's a picture of him coming out in a music daily tomorrow. I'll just bring it with. It'll calm him down."

"You know what I've been trying to figure out, Roy? When did Stubby's ego explode like that? I mean... did I black out for a few years and miss something, because it was like... one day he was Stubs Boardman and the next he was Mr. Arsehole," Gideon said, thoughtfully. "I bet he wouldn't wear a play-doh hat if we made one for him now."

"No, probably not," Leroy agreed. "And I dunno, man. We used to be so all about... you know. Rocking out, or whatever. And making asses out of ourselves playing impromtu shows at the high school assemblies. It used to be funny. Now it's just _angry_. Makes me wonder if signing the band was a good idea, sometimes."

"At least if the Hobbled Gordons fall apart you'll still have friends, Leroy," Lily said. "Stubby is just positioning himself to spend the rest of his life alone."

"Hey, you never know. Maybe he'll figure it out and remember what's important," Remus said with a shrug. "Everyone gets caught up in things sometimes."

"That's optimistic, and I wholly support it," Fabian said. "Not sure if it'll happen, but I hope so. Not that Stubby was ever the nicest guy, but at least he never used to take himself that seriously."

"Why are we still talking about him?" Marlene asked. "Look, I think we should crank the music up, do a bunch of shots, and move the party out back. Hestia and Aidan will hear us, and it's their own fault they're late anyway."

"Good idea," Dorcas said, and then pouted. "Minus the fucking shots, of course."

"You'll be pleased enough when your baby pops out and is healthy and screams for a year straight," Sirius said.

"Bones' are known for having notoriously quiet babies," Edgar said. "I don't see why mine would be any different."

"Because Dorcas is its mother, Bones," Sirius answered, quirking an eyebrow. "She's probably internally training it to annoy the shit out of you."

Lily rolled her eyes. "You don't think before you speak, do you, Sirius?" she asked.

"No, he's right," Dorcas said. "My kid better have a set of lungs on it, man. I'd be disappointed if it couldn't clear a fucking room in a minute or less."

"You know, if you ever need any pointers or help or anything, you can always call Lily or I," Alice said, looking a little worried. "Not that I think you can't do it. It's just always nice to have help."

"She's been keeping me company after school since she found out she was pregnant," Lily said, fondly. "She's getting quite a handle on things. Saved Harry from climbing into the dishwasher the other day, the scamp. Ever since he's starting pulling himself up and dancing he's developed this new thing where he likes to 'help', or thinks he's helping anyhow, by taking all the dirty cutlerly I've put in the dishwasher out again."

"When Remus and I were babysitting him the other night he started cleaning the bathtub with his washcloth while he was still in it," Sirius said. "I told him 'Thank you' and he clapped for himself."

Dorcas smiled and just about said 'aw' before she remembered herself and crossed her arms over her chest and leaned into Ed. "I'm turning into a mom already, and I haven't even had my fucking baby yet."

"That's a good thing, Dor. It means you're going to be prepared," Fabian said. "And I swear, being a good mother isn't going to dent your tough girl reputation. You're still the wildest girl I know."

"Thanks," Dor said, rolling her eyes and reaching over to muss Fabian's hair. "You're so fucking gay."

"Gay or not, he's right. Being a good mom is a big bloody thing to be proud of," James said, putting his arm around Lily and smiling proudly. "Plus, it's a lot of work. Just ask Lils."

Marlene, taking advantage of the apparent baby mania that had everyone distracted, tilted her head and began to kiss Gideon.

Caught completely by surprise, Gideon's eyes went wide, but he was quick to smile into their kiss, relaxing and sliding his hands into his wife's hair, avoiding her 'Bride' headband.

"She'll do fine," Lily was saying.

"Looks like the bride and groom got bored with all the baby stuff," Remus said with a small smirk. "They've decided to entertain themselves."

"God, you two are going to be having sex _all the time_ , aren't you?" Fabian asked, rolling his eyes. "I don't know how I'll be able to stand living with you."

Gideon just kept right on kissing his wife, flipping his brother off in the meantime.

"What is it about weddings that makes sex more necessary to have?" Edgar asked. "Because if getting married makes you have more sex than normal, Dorcas and I will never do it or we'll both be dead of exhaustion."

"Don't be stupid. Of course we getting fucking married someday," Dorcas replied blithely. "Although we'll have to come up with something better than eloping to Berlin and being married by fucking drag queens, you attention whores."

James snickered. "Oh, _they're_ attention whores, are they?"

"Attention whores or not, what's the plan now that you're married?" Alice asked brightly.

Breaking away from Marlene's lips, Gideon said, "We're moving to America in a year."

"Oh," Frank said. "Well. What about the Order?"

"We've already had this conversation," Marlene said dismissively. "It'll probably disband. But a year is a long time. You never know."

"Anything could happen," Remus agreed, and then rolled his eyes as Marlene began kissing Gideon again.

Arthur popped his head in and said, "Hate to interrupt you lot, but the first round is ready off the barbie and Molly's got it all set up out here, so if you want to move this little party outside, now would be a good time!"

"Food!" Sirius exclaimed, hopping to his feet. "Collect the booze, ladies and gents! Hopefully by the end of the evening we'll all be so blissful as the newlyweds."

"Been there, done that," Lily commented. "And it was twice as uncomfortable at the time as I was eight months pregnant."

"Oh, you loved it," James teased, getting up and pulling her to her feet as well, pressing a kiss to her cheek as soon as she was upright. "It was amazing."

"Shut the fuck up," Dorcas said as she got up and stretched. "You don't know a bloody thing about being pregnant until you carry around something the size of a large watermelon for bloody months, and then shit it out. And don't feed me any of that miracle crap. I'm not looking forward to it."

"Yes you are," Emmeline interjected with a smile. "You're scared, but you're excited."

"I'm a lot of things, apparently. Hungry, too," Dorcas replied, rolling her eyes. "Come on, Bonesie. Food time, and I know you'll want to hover and tell me if I'm putting on too much fucking mayonaise."

Remus smiled and shook his head, standing and taking Sirius' hand as they all began to head out. What a group they were.

"Oh, and there are a couple veggie burgers being cooked inside for those of you who prefer not to eat cow flesh," Fabian said. "They'll be done soon."

"Technically it's cow insides," Sirius said pointedly, snuffling against the back of Remus' neck and kissing it lightly.

"It's still a living thing," Caradoc said. "I wonder what a Sirius burger would taste like?"

Sirius grinned, waggling his eyebrows lewdly at Caradoc. "Wouldn't you like to know."

Remus rolled his eyes and passed Sirius a plate, leaning into him a little in the process. "While I support vegetarianism in others, I must say I quite enjoy some good... and thank goodness my sense of self preservation has evolved enough that I'm not dumb enough to finish that sentence."

Dorcas snorted. "You just know there were at least three of us waiting for it."

"So you like your meat, huh?" James teased anyway. "Can't get buy without a giant sausage time and again? Why Moony, you dog."

"I'm flattered you consider it giant, Prongs," Sirius said with a snort. "That's a term I've only heard you apply to your own cock."

"Oh, really?" Lily questioned with a wry smile, raising her eyebrows as she helped herself to some mashed potatoes.

"Well. Mine is gargantuan. I've long since decided that 'giant' just isn't a big enough word for mine," James said with a grin.

"You know who has the best penis here?" Marlene asked with a bright grin. "Gideon. And none of you can see it because it is married to _me_."

Everyone in the group burst out laughing, and Gideon felt his cheeks burn red. "I'm glad for that. I really didn't fancy whipping it out for a contest."

"I don't think you'd really win," Edgar chimed in with a grin. "But I'm not _cocky_."

"God, shut the fuck up," Dorcas said with a laugh. "Honestly! This competition is just bollocks. Do you hear any of us girls going, 'Hey, Lily, I think my nipples are the best ones here. Want to fucking compare?' No. Because we're not retarded like _you_."

"Anyone with pierced nipples wins automatically," Sirius said. "I don't care how lovely your tits are."

"Mum's been trying to convince Dor to take hers out though," Edgar explained. "Wants her to breast feed."

"And can we not fucking talk about the conversation I had with your _mother_ about my fucking _nipples_ , thanks," Dorcas said, blushing a little.

"You get embarrassed about the strangest things," James commented.

"Being pregnant totally gives you and everyone else the right to talk about every body part and bodily function and everything. You're going to have some really personal conversations with some really random people," Alice chirped. "You'll get used to it."

Trying not to laugh, Edgar said, "It's not as bad as the conversation you had with _Sherry_ about pregnancy poop."

"Pregnancy poop?" Sirius asked. "That's actually a topic that was broached to you, Dor?"

"I've had stranger conversations with James' mother," Lily said. "I was lucky enough to get to talk to her about how sex changed after having a baby."

"Fuck off," Dorcas replied, turning even redder. "You're having way too much fucking fun with this, Bonesie. It was fucking humiliating. I ran for the basement as soon as she paused for a breath." Pausing thoughtfully, Dorcas turned to Lily and quirked her lips. "Better or worse?"

"That depends on the man, sweetie," Lily answered. "It can be just as fullfilling and more stimulating, or it can be like throwing a hot dog down a hallway. Thankfully I got the former," she added, grinning cheekily at James.

"It always comes back to sex," Sirius muttered before taking a bite out of his corn on the cob.

"I'm sorry, Dorcas," Edgar said, but he was still smiling, and still trying not to laugh. "It could've been worse. Sherry could've tried to have the sex talk with you instead of my mum. She was gunning for it, but I talked her down off of that ledge."

"Your sister-in-law sounds like a real treat, Ed," Caradoc commented.

"You've no idea," Edgar replied. "Trust me. I love her to death but she is one _interesting_ bird. Fits well with Jon, I suppose."

"You're one to talk about having interesting birds," Sirius said, grinning through a mouthful of corn.

"I'm more than fucking interesting," Dorcas replied, trying not to wince at the hot dog and the hallway comparison Lily used. "I'm fantastic. I'm brilliant. I'm fucking _amazing_. You all love me."

"Of course we do, but that doesn't mean you and Ed aren't a bit of a weird match," Fabian pointed out.

"It's not really weird. It just sort of fits," Emmeline commented. "I couldn't picture either of them with anyone else."

"I honestly thought Edgar was insane for taking you on, Dorcas," Lily admitted. "And before you get up in arms about it, it's because we've all known Edgar for years as this straight-up, quiet, insightful fellow, and then you came along and exploded his world."

Edgar looked around at everyone and said, "Have I really changed that much? All she did was make faces at me."

Sirius rolled his eyes. "Speaking from years of experience, Ed, yeah, I'd have to say you've changed a touch in Dorcas' wake. The getting her pregnant is merely an aside of that." Sirius went back to the table to grab another piece of corn and noticed Gideon and Marlene on the other side of the table, both slowly getting more and more smashed, but completely absorbed in one another. Sirius wasn't usually one for serious, insightful moments, but he couldn't help but think of how perfectly the two of them fit together, and how glad he was that they'd finally found one another.

"I didn't mean to do that," Dorcas said, looking a little alarmed as she faced Ed. "Change you. What's changed, anyway? He's still fucking fairly straight-up and insightful. He's not a fucking mute or anything, but it's not like he's loud like me. I haven't changed him."

"Don't get defensive. It isn't a bad thing," James assured her. "It's just... sort of like you two were so extremely different that you balance each other out a bit. I don't know if you've noticed, Dor, but you've changed a fair bit too."

"Have fucking not!" Dorcas argued. "Name one thing that's different!"

"Well, you're not a lesbian anymore, for one," Lily pointed out. "Considering how big a part of your personality that was when you joined the Order, that's a pretty big thing."

"You don't swear as much as you used to," Sirius said. "I mean, you still swear like a sailor, but nothing in comparrison to every second word being fuck."

"You're quiet sometimes," Caradoc added. "Like, you're content to just sit there and watch, and don't need to be the centre of attention anymore."

"You're about to have a baby," Frank said. "And you honestly don't seem as petrified about it as we expected you to be."

"You've started dressing nicer," Lily added.

Sheepishly, Edgar interjected, "My mother's been making her clothes."

"And I can't very well tell her to fuck off, can I?" Dorcas interjected. "And you're all fucking wrong, you know that? Sure, maybe not about the lesbian thing, but it isn't like that fucking matters. And I still fucking swear, and just because I'm quiet _now_ doesn't mean I'm different, it just means I haven't got anything to fucking say at the moment. And I _am_ scared. God, I'm fucking petrified. But what do you want me to do? Have panic attacks every time any says anything about babies? It's a bit hard with this lot! Fucking fuck. I want a fucking cigarette."

Remus exchanged an expression with Sirius and wondered who eactly would be the next to speak up after Dorcas' little outburst. James opened his mouth for a moment, and then shut it again, frowning. Dorcas looked a little strained and tired all of a sudden, and James wondered if it was hormones or something (he learned better than to ever include the words 'just hormones' into any sentence, even in his brain), but wasn't quite sure what to say.

"Change isn't a bad thing, you know," Fabian finally spoke up, deciding to be brave and take Dorcas on. "Look, we're not all trying to be condescending about it, and sorry if it seems that way. But change is good. Everyone changes. You _have_ changed. You've grown up a little. You're smarter, you're older, you're more mature. Fractionally, mind, but you are. And you're happier, I think. Though evidently not at the moment. What's the sore spot all about, Dor?"

Edgar sighed. What didn't anyone understand about _not adding extra stress_ to what the bloody doctor kept telling them was a high-risk pregnancy? It was all bad enough, really, especially with his mother tutting at home and his father standing in the garden since they'd gotten the message, chewing tobacco and trying not to pass judgement on Dorcas' parents. Everyone was quiet (even Gideon and Marlene had stop making eyes at each other to pay attention), and Fabian was looking expectantly at Dorcas, who looked at Edgar. "Can I?" he asked her.

She shrugged.

"Dorcas' parents found out about the baby," Edgar said quietly. "Her mother called the house and left a message on the machine asking Dor to come home so they could, um... 'handle the matter discretely, as a family'."

"Look, it's not a big deal. Like I ever listen to them anyway, right?" Dorcas said, who had no doubt her mother would probably push for an abortion if she got the chance.

Dorcas scratched her nose and felt awkward, still not entirely sure why she'd freaked out so much about the whole idea of change. Maybe because her family had always tried to change her. Oh, they loved her, she was sure about that, but they wished she was different. She always swore she'd never try to change anyone else; she swore she'd never be like them. So when they said she'd changed Ed, it sort of reminded her of that, and of them, and of that stupid message her stupid mother had left.

"I just don't get how she could even think I'd respond to a stupid fucking message like that. I haven't talked to them in weeks and she's all, 'Hello dear. I heard from a friend at the country club about your embarrassing little situation. Why don't you come on home so I can force you to scrape your god damned mistake out of your stupid, slutty body. Call me!' Honestly, right? Like I'd respond to a fucking message like that. I haven't changed _that_ much."

"We meant change in a good way, Dorcas," Emmeline said gently. "And you don't have to do anything you don't want to do, no matter what your parents say."

"And it's our baby," Edgar reminded her. "Just let them _try_ , really. I think if they came to the house my mother wouldn't let them in off the porch."

Hoping to lighten the mood a little (it was getting a little intense for a wedding party), Sirius said, "She chased me _off_ the porch with a broom the first time we all got drunk. "Get away from my front door, Sirius Black! Go home! Don't you _dare_ toss up in my rose bushes!'"

Dorcas smiled far too brightly and latched onto Sirius' change of subject. "She's great, isn't she? She'd have fucking whacked you with it, too, if you hadn't listened. You listened, right?"

"Of course he did, else he wouldn't be here to tell the tale. He'd still, to this day, be tending her rose bushes and begging for forgiveness," Marlene said, voice slurring only slightly. "Now. I'm a bride. I'm also drunk. I think this means it's time for a toast. Everybody! Molly, Arthur, come over here! Come on, grab drinks." Spotting a head pering in from the side of the house, Marlene (who liked the girl a lot more now that she wasn't dating Gideon) called out, "Hestia! Come along in! We're just about to do a toast. Aidan, hi! How're you two?"

"Not quite as good as you, it looks," Aidan said with a smile. "Bit early to be sloshed, isn't it?"

"Oh, you're one to talk. I was at the Christmas party, you lush," James laughed. "Now everyone grab drinks and gather round. You heard the bride."

"So, what do we toast to?" Gideon asked his wife, turning his head and grinning at her. "Great sex? Good friends? The happy amount of booze we've already consumed?"

"When James and Lily got married it was the maid of honour, the best man, and the dads," Sirius instructed. "So I guess Fabian and Caradoc should make a speech, and... James and I could pretend to be each of your father's!"

"Is that a good idea, really?" Lily asked.

"Of course it is!" Fabian said brightly and looped the arm not holding a drink around Caradoc's waist. "Me first."

"Typical little brother words," James quipped, rolling his eyes.

"Typical Fay words," Arthur chuckled.

"Shut up and listen, all of you. For far too many years I was in the dark about Gideon and Marlene's relationship. By the time I heard about all the drama you two had created, Gideon was already heartbroken and Marlene had been with Stubby for ages. Pretty much, you were both being total wankers. I yelled my bit at Marlene and did my best to patch my brother up. Once they started sleeping together again, I had hope. When Marlene really didn't go on tour with Stubby, I had even more hope. When Gideon called me at work to tell me that he and Marlene were eloping to Berlin _right now_ , I understandably made sure he was of sound mind before I hopped into the van. From the moment that purple drag queen started singing and Marlene laughed her way down the aisle, I knew everything was going to be all right. To a happy life, you two. Finally!"

"I'll drink to finally!" Emmeline laughingly called, raising her glass along with Fabian.

"Finally!"

"Guess it's my turn then," Caradoc said. "I'm not really one for this sort of thing, but, well. I'll never forget the first time I met Gideon and Marlene. Gideon was locked in a cell with his brother, and Marlene was annoying the shit out of everyone in the station, trying to bust the two of them out. Since then, and since finding out about the interesting sort of relationship they'd carried on over the years, I've had many opportunites to wonder what was wrong with the two of them, and why they were passing up on such an obviously great thing together. Now, after catching her bouqet ahead of a heard of trannies and drag queens, all I have left to say is good on you, about time, and that I wish you all the happiness in the world."

"To happiness!"

"My go!" James said, before Sirius could jump in. He clapped a hand on Gideon's shoulder, who was closest. In a ridiculous voice, he began to speak, all the while miming smoking a pipe with the plastic fork off of Lily's plate. "You broke your mother's heart by eloping, boy! You absolutely _broke_ her _heart_ that she didn't get to see you marry that lovely girl standing next to you. And me! Hoo boy. Son, I have to tell you, I haven't been prouder in my entire life! Atta boy, snatching her up before she could come to her senses and change her mind. You've been mooning over her damn near since the day you were born. All that playing football in the park, and playing doctor in the closet... it was all just an excuse to touch each other."

"James!" Remus scolded, looking amused and appalled at the same time.

"Shut up, I'm winging it. I've never met his dad before, but I figure parents are supposed to be embarrassing," James stage whispered and then cleared his throat and continued. "I never doubted for one second you two would spend your life together. Not half the time because you were so stupid I thought you'd go and get yourselves killed, pair of careless kids that you were. But here you are. Married and happy and least if your mother didn't get to see you get married, she'd better get some grandchildren out of the deal. There's no big welcome to the family here, Marlene McKinnon. You've been family for decades. Congratulations, kids. To love! And all the positions it comes with! Don't think I haven't heard those stories."

The requisite "to love!" was murmured amidst laughter as James grinned out at everyone and took a big swallow of his drink.

"Honey, honey, honey," Sirius said, slinging an arm around Marlene's shoulder and kissing her on the cheek. "My one and only baby girl, it's about time you and Gideon Prewett shacked up together! I've always liked that boy, he's always had a good head on his shoulders, you know. He's like the son I never had, I tell you what! Even if he probably spent most of your high school years avoiding me for fear of me smashing him 'round the head with a bat if I ever found out he was violating my daughter!"

"Not too far off," Gideon muttered smiling.

"I knew it!" Sirius exclaimed with a fake growl, shaking a finger at Gideon. "You brute! How _dare_ you touch my special little girl? Who do you think you are, boy?"

"Oh shove off, _Dad_ ," Marlene laughed. "I quite enjoyed all the violating he did. Gid knows just how to touch your special little girl."

"Thank _God_ he's not actually your father," Remus muttered, shaking his head. His friends were so completely inappropriate.

"She was always a headstrong one, my Marlene," Sirius said fondly, patting her on the cheek. "Alas! I knew that someday you would grow up and shag men rotten but I'm afraid it came too soon for your dear old daddy. At least you picked one who can shag you just as rotten back. Least I'd imagine so if your new brother-in-laws tales are even remotely true."

"Come on, you old codger. Wrap it up! You're just rambling now!" James called with a grin.

Fabian rolled his eyes at the antics and raised his glass. "What's this toast to then? Shagging rotten?"

"Shagging rotten, indeed!" Sirius agreed, grinning, and knocked back the rest of his drink.

"We should all have our heads checked for the shit we come up with," Lily said. "It isn't normal."

"Normal is such a silly concept," Emmeline said as she sipped her own drink. "Happy is what counts."

***

"All rightch," Sirius slurred, licking his lips, eyeing the cards in his hand doubtfully. "'M not sure how this one works again. Ish it, I go fishin', and I take a drink?"

"You draw a card, and then whatever that card is determines what you do. I don't think you're even supposed to have any in your hand," Remus said, furrowing his eyebrows in concentration. He was drunk, but not _nearly_ as drunk as Sirius. He'd been well on his way about an hour ago, but he'd stopped drinking and was trying to be the responsible one. Of course, at the moment, he was leaning against Sirius affectionately and inching his hand up his boyfriend's thigh.

Dorcas rolled her eyes. "You two are both sossed. Fucking idiots. Here, pick up that card. It's a three, and it means you get to pick someone else to take a drink."

"'M so confused," Sirius said in a sad voice, pouting. "Moony. Moony, your hand ish real close to m'cock."

"No it isn't," Remus replied, squeezing Sirius' thigh. "It's on your leg."

Leaning to peer under the table, Emmeline snorted. "Actually, it is. And if you're looking to get laid, Remus, you might have to wait until he sobers up a bit."

Marlene sat down on the edge of the picnic table bench and flopped forward to rest on the table. "What're we talkin' 'bout?"

"Fucking," Dorcas replied. "Shouldn't you be in the process, by the way? Where the fuck is Gideon?"

Lily, only a little tipsy, answered, "He's playing limbo with James, Arthur and Leroy. Arthur is very flexible for a man his age. Molly's a lucky woman."

Sirius giggled. "Moony! Moony do that again!"

"Do what again?" Remus asked, mock innocently, before he smiled a little wickedly and squeezed.

"Well, will you look at that," Fabian snorted as he drew a card and took a drink. Setting his cup down, he waggled his eyebrows at Remus and added, "You really _can_ be a bit of a minx."

"Moony?" Sirius asked. "I don't wanna play cards when your doin' stuff like that to m'cock. Letsh go somewhere, please?"

"No shame," Lily said, laughing. "None at all."

"Shame on you, Sirius," Remus said, shooting a smile at Lily before turning his attention back to Sirius. "And you know, I suddenly have to go to the loo."

Fabian snickered. "Do you perhaps have a suddenly full bladder as well, Sirius?"

Sirius seemed to think hard for a moment. "Yesh? Yesh! I need to pee, and Moony is gonna help me pee."

"I wish I had a video camera," Lily commented as Sirius and Remus got to their feet. "This is proof that Remus is the sexually insatiable little tart I've always known him to be."

"I am not," Remus said as he looped a hand through Sirius' front belt loop and tugged him towards the house. "I'm drunk anyway, it doesn't count!"

Leaning into Edgar, Dorcas sighed morosely and made eyes at him. "I wish I could get drunk and go fuck you in the loo."

"We don't need to be drunk to shag, Princess," Edgar said, smiling wryly.

"That doesn't bode well for our card game," Lily said, finishing the rest of her drink. "C'mon Em, lets go fine Hestia and Alice and gossip."

"Good thing I have my very own bedroom here, considering all the loos are used up," Fabian quipped. Well, there was a third in the master bedroom, but he didn't suppose anyone would go through Molly and Arthur's room to get there. "Now all I've got to do is find my boyfriend. Anyone seen him?"

"Last I saw he was chatting up your sister by the snacks," Dorcas answered as she and Ed got to their feet.

"What an orgy Remus has started," Edgar commented, taking Dorcas' hand and moving in the vague direction of the house.

"I think it's already been well established that our lot likes sex," Emmeline said, smiling at Leroy. "Honestly. They can't even keep it in their pants for the duration of a wedding party. Although I woudln't be surprised if the happy couple doesn't last until the party's over either."

"Mm, but we have an excuse," Marlene said with a silly grin. "We're newlyweds."

***

The minute they'd gotten down the basement steps, Remus had started pulling off Sirius' shirt. Inside the bathroom with the door closed and locked his trousers were pulled down and somehow Remus' clothes had vanished, and Sirius was pressed against the door with his wrists pinned above his head, Remus kissing him frantically.

"Mmm, you taste like whisky," Sirius murmured against Remus' lips. "When were you drinkin' whisky?"

"I was drinking whatever you gave me," Remus replied breathlessly, his mouth against Sirius' throat as he ground his hips into Sirius' and moaned softly. "God, this is totally improper. I can't believe they all know exactly what we came in here to do."

"Your secret identity has been blown, Clark Kent," Sirius said, his head spinning with a combination of arousal and having had too much to drink. "I 'spose that makes me your kryptonite."

"You're ridiculous," Remus laughed, sliding one hand down from where it held Sirius' arms above his head, dancing over Sirius' skin to come to rest on his hip as he nipped at Sirius' neck. "And you aren't my kryptonite. Kryptonite hurts Superman, and you do quite the opposite."

"I always thought Superman was gay for Lex Luthor," Sirius said, breathlessly, thrusting his hips.

"I think we ought to stop talking," Remus replied with a smile. "Sound all right to you?"

Without waiting for an answer, Remus backed off a bit and began looking for something they could use as a substitute for lubricant. Whe he opened the medicine cabinet and spotted a bottle of lube, however, he laughed.

Walking back over to Sirius, Remus breathed, "Remind me to thank Fabian."

"He's always thinkin' of others," Sirius said, sliding his now free hands into Remus' hair and fidgeting slightly.

"Indeed," Remus replied, kissing Sirius long and deep on the mouth. Just barely bulling away, Remus whispered, "Now turn around."

***

"We're horrible hosts," Gideon said, stumbling into _their_ bedroom. "I don't think the bride and groom are supposed to leave the party."

"The bride and groom _always_ leave the party," Marlene replied, pausing to kiss Gideon and push the door shut behind them with her elbow. "How long has it been since you've been to a wedding? It's just that the party isn't usually at the bride and groom's house is all."

"Oh," Gideon said. "Right. Well. We should go back though. Eventually."

"Eventually," Marlene agreed, smiling. "It's nice to have a little time alone with my husband, though. Even if you did get totally trounced by Arthur at limbo."

"It's no wonder he and Molly have so many bloody children," Gideon commented. "And it's nice to have a little alone time with my wife, too. And I still can't believe that. That you're my wife."

"I know. It's surreal," Marlene said, flopping back onto Gideon's bed. "It makes me stupidly happy when I think about it, though. It was the right thing."

"It was. We should've came to our senses years ago," Gideon said, lying down next to her. "We're starting late but it feels like we're 18 again."

"I love you, Gid," Marlene said softly, turning to smile widely at him. "I really, really, crazy, over-the-moon love you."

"Ditto," Gideon replied, returning the smile. "More than anything and everything. And I'm really excited to make a life with you."

"Me too," Marlene answered, and then rolled and propped herself up on one elbow to lean down and kiss Gideon. Smirking and using a terrible American accent, Marlene quipped, "Ravish me now, cowboy."

"You know, in America, I'm told they like accents," Gideon said, turning to straddle Marlene and starting to kiss the side of her face down to her neck. "Besides, I'd rather hear my British wife telling me to ravish her than some American cowgirl."

"Is that so," Marlene laughed, falling back onto the bed as Gideon pounced on her. "Well then. Ravish me now, Gideon."

"Okay," Gideon replied softly, and kissed Marlene's mouth, sliding a hand under the shirt/dress thing she was wearing.

Pulling away for a moment, Marlene exclaimed, "God, I seriously can't believe we got married!"

"Kinny, dear wife of mine, you're interrupting my ravishing," Gideon mock complained. "It's hard to concentrate when you're all distracted. We need to indulge in our matrimonial bliss, here."

"Right, right. Sorry," Marlene giggled. "You have my full and undivided attention. Continue." 

***

Gideon was laying on his back on the picnic table, staring into the late night sky. Things were starting to slow down now because of the hour and the alcohol, and the sex that had apparently been ongoing all over the place for the majority of the evening. Gideon and Marlene had long since returned from their bedroom, and had long since started drinking again, and Gideon was honestly having trouble seeing straight. He didn't know where Marlene had gone, or where anyone else was for that matter, and rather than upchuck all over the lawn he'd decided to have a lie down on the first hard surface he'd come across.

"All right, Gideon?" Aidan said, approaching the picnic table with caution, so as not to startle the man. In his experience, if you surprised a sloshed bloke, it tended to end badly. "If you need any help, I'm your man. I owe you for the Christmas party anyway."

"'M a lil' fucked," Gideon answered, tilting his head back to look at whomever was speaking. "And you're Aidan."

"Yes, yes sir I am," Aidan said, sitting down on the bench. "Anything I can do to help you, uh, become less fucked? Water? Coffee? Can't have the groom getting alcohol poisoning now."

"Nah, nah," Gideon said, attempting to wave his hand in a dismissive way. "'M _fine_. 'Ave you seen my wife?"

"Yes, actually. She's chatting with the girls. They've all congregated in the basement living room. I just left Hestia there," Aidan said. "Did you want me to get her?"

"Hestia? No, no, don't get Hes she'll jus' be embarrassed," Gideon said.

"No, I meant Marlene," Aidan laughed, and then looked at Gideon speculatively. "Why would Hestia be embarrassed?"

"Ex-boyfriend and a new boyfriend," Gideon said, as though it were the most obvious thing. "She pro'ly wouldn't know what to say."

"I didn't know you two were together," Aidan said. "And that explains a lot. She's oddly quiet when the two of us are in the same room. Wonder why it bothers her so much."

"Well she _was_ shagging us both at the same time," Gideon said. "She pro'ly feels guilty."

Aidan tensed. Froze. Wondered idly if throwing up on the groom at the wedding party was a social faux pas, and then realized his brain was thinking nonsense in an attempt to delay the inevitable understanding. Scrambling off the bench and away from Gideon, Aidan took a few harsh, deep breaths. He was dizzy, and bloody _hell_ those words had hurt.

"What the fuck are you talking about, man?" Aidan spat out, and he didn't know if it was because he needed to torture himself by hearing it again or he was hoping Gideon was just drunk enough that he thought it was funny to joke about shit like that when Aidan was in love, he was in _love_ with Hestia. "That's not funny, you know. Really not funny."

Gideon pulled himself into a half-sitting position, and looked at Aidan confused. "Oh. Shit. 'Spose I shouldn't have told you that."

So it was true. Hestia had been... Oh fuck, and Aidan loved her. He still loved her. But Gideon was sitting there looking confused, like he didn't quite know what he'd just done or how much those few slurred sentences had fucked everything up. Suddenly, Aidan's face twisted and he began sucking in oxygen like it was time he could rewind before launching himself at Gideon, fist cracking him square in the jaw hard enough to knock the off-balance drunk right off the damned table.

From across the yard, James turned at the noise and saw Aidan breathing hard and standing over Gideon, who was on the ground and bleeding from the mouth. After exchanging a look with Edgar, James made his way over, sure that Ed was close on his heels.

"Hey, Lynch old boy, calm down," James called as he got close. "You can't kill him or Marlene'll do you right in, and it's not worth it. What's going on?"

From the ground, surveying his now blood-covered hand, Gideon managed to say, "Hestia. Told him," and then tried to sit up.

Looking between Aidan and Gideon, Edgar had no idea what to say. Between the guilt he felt from having known and not told Aidan in the first place, and the horrible pang his stomach made when he looked at Aidan's obviously hurt face, Edgar was lost. He just stood there, and he looked.

"How long?" Aidan croaked, rubbing his sore knuckles with his other hand.

"Christ, Lynch. What does it matter?" James interjected, knowing the truth would only make it worse. "Either you can forgive her or you can't. It doesn't matter how long."

"It matters to me!" Aidan shouted angrily. "How god damned long, Prewett?"

"Last August," Gideon answered, meekly. "Until last week."

Aidan fisted a hand in his hair and turned his back on the others in case he was going to do something stupid like cry. He was such an idiot. He thought she'd loved him, and she'd just been playing him. Right from the very beginning, she'd been playing him. Their entire relationship was a load of rubbish. She'd been fucking Gideon the whole time.

Aidan turned around with the intention of punching Gideon again, but before he could get there, James caught him around the waist and struggled to hold him back.

"Come on, Lynch," James grunted as Aidan fought him. The bugger was bloody strong and James couldn't quite hold him. "Ed, a little help? Come on, Aidan. Kicking the shit out of Gideon isn't going to fix anything."

Edgar swallowed and stepped in, helping James to hold Aidan back so Gideon could scramble drunkenly out of firing range. "Aidan," Ed said, quietly, knowing that it probably wouldn't make any difference. "Aidan, mate, she still loves you. You've got to know that."

"Oh, fuck off, Ed," Aidan spat, shoving Ed and James away from him, both of whom had relaxed their grip when Aidan had stopped his attempts to cause Gideon a world of pain. "What the fuck do you know about it, huh? You didn't look too surprised, so I'm betting you both knew, didn't you? You knew she was playing me like an idiot, trailing me along after her, making me think she ruddy _loved_ me." Turning his attention to Gideon, Aidan's voice lost its mean edge and he just sounded defeated as he added, "How could you do it? Do you and Marlene just not give a shit about the other guy, huh? Do you just not _care_..." Aidan's voice broke and he paused a moment to take a deep breath. "Christ. You have no idea, do you? I bet you've never been the other guy."

"Fuck you, I didn't tell her to do it! She made that decision all on her own!" Gideon snapped, feeling suddenly sobered, and still bleeding. "And actually, yeah, I have been the fucking other guy."

"Then you should've fucking known!" Aidan shouted. He was being irrational. He knew that. He knew he shouldn't be blaming Gideon, but it hurt a lot less to blame Gideon than it did to blame Hestia. He loved her, and that hurt enough right now.

"I think we all need to take a few deep, relaxing breaths," James said, and found it mildly funny that he was playing peacekeeper. He sort of thought a good fistfight was a decent way to solve things every once in a while, but considering Aidan seemed mostly sober (and a strong little bastard on top) and Gideon was drunk as fuck, it hardly seemed fair. "Look, the whole situation blows, okay? But we just have to try and relax..."

"Bugger you, Potter," Aidan snarled and shoved James away too.

"Aidan, really, it's not Gideon's fault," Edgar tried to interject. "It's..."

"Seriously, will both of you just fuck off?" Aidan interrupted. He glared at Edgar. "I'm pissed enough at you right now as it is, and Potter, you have no bloody place telling me to relax. Just... this has nothing to do with you, okay? So just fuck off."

"I don't think that's..." James started.

"I won't hit him again, all right? Just _fuck off_ ," Aidan said, his voice almost pleading. He didn't like having an audience. He didn't like his emotions to be on show for everyone and their bloody dog. And he didn't need to be restrained when all he felt like doing at the moment was having a breakdown. "All right?"

Edgar just nodded, and while James was still protesting a little, tugged him away from Aidan and Gideon and toward the house. He was going to hear it from Aidan later, he knew that. And he was going to deserve every word of it. If there was one thing that Edgar hated it was disappointing people.

Gideon frowned. "What d'you want me to say?"

"I don't know," Aidan said and sat down hard, looking more like his knees had given out than like he'd planned on sitting. "Christ, I don't know. I thought she ruddy loved me, but she was just... Look, sorry about your face. I shouldn't have hit you. It's not your fault."

"She does love you," Gideon said. "And my face isn't tha' important. Look, mate, what happened between Hestia and I was complicated. A lot of it was that she didn't want to hurt me and that I would lose Marlene _again_ if I dumped her... and Christ, I should've kept my mouth shut."

"Yeah, you bloody well should have," Aidan agreed miserably. "So what do I do? I don't want to dump her. Christ, I love her for fuck sakes. But it feels like-" Stopping abruptly and letting out a bark of derisive laughter, Aidan shook his head. "Listen to me. It just... feels like she broke my heart. There's no other way to... Christ, don't laugh or anything. I know it's girly, but I thought she and I... I thought we were soulmates or something."

"I'm not gonna laugh at you," Gideon said. "I was married by a drag queen dressed head to toe in purple. And you prob'ly are soulmates, or whatever. Hes made a mistake. She's made a lot of mistakes, and she's trying to fix 'em and I think she's starting with you."

"Do you know what a mistake is? It's a one time, stupid thing that someone does when they aren't thinking clearly. Not months of lies," Aidan replied coldly. "It'd be perfectly justified if I hated her for it, and you know it."

"Yes, I 'spose it would be," Gideon said. "But you can't have her and hate her. You can only have her an' love her and forgive her, or you can break-up with her, hate her, an' be miserable forever."

"How am I supposed to know how she really feels, though? She might not even like me all that much. Maybe she's bloody in love with _you_."

Gideon snorted. "I can guarantee you that she's not," he said. "I tried to propose to Marlene _ages_ ago, and she turned me down, and because I was, and am a soppy twit, I kept the ring in my jacket pocket. Hes found it, and she came over while Marlene was over, and while I was trying to explain that Marlene was there, she thought I was trying to propose to _her_ and blurted out that she couldn't marry me!" He was really starting to ramble now, his words slurring together horribly. He was going to be _so_ fucking hungover in the morning.

"Right, well, I explained about Marlene, and she about you, and she said that we _had_ to break up because she loved you and was moving in with you," Gideon finished.

"Oh," Aidan said, and then shook his head again. "But if she loved me, then why didn't she dump you when things first started to get serious with us? It doesn't make any sense."

"Pretty sure she was afraid I'd kill myself," Gideon answered. "I was, ah. Rather tore up over Marlene after an incident at James and Lily's wedding and I can't say my mental health was very stable."

Aidan smiled sardonically. "Oh, so you were lying before and it really _is_ your fault. I oughta deck you again."

"Hestia and I both made a mess out of things, mate," Gideon said. "The only thing I can say is that I'm sorry, and that I'm sure she is too."

Aidan blew a breath out between his lips and just thought for a moment. Gideon was right. He would be miserable without her. And if everything Gideon said was true, Hestia had just been trying to stop them both from getting hurt, in her own screwed up way. And he _did_ still love her. He loved her quite a lot, actually. He'd never been committed enough to one girl to even tell her that, but he'd told Hestia and asked her to move in with him. He was pretty sure it was a forever kind of love.

"Aw, Christ. Look, don't tell her about this, okay? You know she'll feel like shit if she finds out I know," Aidan said finally.

"I. Okay," Gideon said. "So you're not going to tell her that you know?"

"No, I don't think so. Not unless she ever brings it up," Aidan said. "Guess it just doesn't matter much in the big scheme of things, if what you said is all true. And it had better be."

"I wouldn't lie," Gideon said. "I'm too drunk to lie."

"Yeah," Aidan snorted, rolling his eyes. "What a mess you just about made, huh? You're lucky I'm so barmy for Hestia."

"Lucky for her, really," Gideon said. "Despite everything I wanted to be good for her, but I couldn't do that. At least you can show her what it's like to be properly loved."

"Now who's girly," Aidan teased. "Look, no hard feelings though, right? We just pretend this didn't happen?"

"Right," Gideon said. "Nothing happened. I probably won't remember it in the morning anyhow. Uh, Aidan?"

"Yeah?" Aidan asked warily. He hoped Gideon wasn't going to punch him back.

"Don't be too hard on Ed, eh? Seems a stupid thing to ask you to do, but. Uh," Gideon paused. "Dorcas is probably going to punch me for telling you this but I figure I owe you a secret. They're going to ask you to be the baby's godfather."

"Really?" Aidan asked with a grin. "You bastard. I was all set to ream him out for not telling me stuff that's my business, and now I just want to punch the idiot in the shoulder and have a listen to Dor's belly. Bugger you."

"Good. Good," Gideon said, grinning back. "I think he was probably just stuck between a rock and a hard place."

"Probably," Aidan agreed with a sigh. "He's a good sort, he is."

***

Most everyone was passed out all over the place (Gideon had stumbled over Sirius and Remus in the kitchen on the floor, Arthur and Molly had had the good sense to go to bed, and Fabian and Caradoc seemed to have stayed in theirs after going in for a quick romp). All off the girls were sleeping on various pieces of furniture in the basement living room, while the blokes were on the floor, and Gideon was half-drunk and half-asleep, and blinked blearily at the open curtains. It took a minute for him to realize that the sun was starting to rise.

Crawling over to Marlene, asleep in his chair, Gideon shook her gently. "Kinny," he whispered. "Kinny, wake up."

"No, go away. I was on a beach in paradise with Gid, warm waves, and a parrot," she murmured, burying her head deeper into the awkward crook of her arm.

"I am Gid," Gideon said. "Wake up and come outside with me."

"What?" Marlene mumbled, still sleep confused. "But where's our beach then?"

"Oh, c'mon," Gideon said, and stood, scooping her into his arms and heading up the stairs toward the door with her. She seemed to drift off again, nestling into him, and in the garden he set her in the hammock and climbed in with her, snuggling close. "Wake up, Marlene. Watch the sunrise with your husband."

Marlene's eyes squinted open finally, and she yawned rubbing at them. The sunrise. With her husband.

Happiness surged up in her, almost to the point of being overwhelming. "Oh. Look, it's the dawn of our eighth day as husband and wife."

"Yes it is," Gideon said, sliding his arms around her, pulling her close. "Does it feel any different to be Mrs. McKinnon-Prewett today than it did eight days ago?"

"Feels better and better the realer it gets," Marlene answered softly, leaning back into him comfortably. "And I expect I'll keep saying that until our first fight."

"We wouldn't be us if we didn't fight." Gideon kissed the top of her head and added, "We've just been too busy shagging since we got back from Berlin to bother."

"Too true," Marlene agreed with a sleepy smile. "You do realize we're watching the sunrise together, though? Sounds to me like we're going soft. Or at least you are since it was your idea."

"Just because we fight and shag doesn't mean we can't be soppy and romantic together," Gideon said. "Didn't you ask me one if I'd ever sprinkle rose petals and light candles for you?"

"That was theoretical," Marlene giggled, voice laughingly defensive. "I just wanted to know if you'd be a real boyfriend."

"Do real boyfriends light candles?" Gideon asked. "What do real husbands do, then?"

"Shut their traps and let their wives go back to sleep, that's what," Marlene murmured, letting her eyes fall shut. "And also bring breakfast in bed every morning."

"I'll be at work before you wake up though," Gideon argued. "You'd knock it all over in your sleep and then leave it for me to clean up when I got home."

"Mmm, yeah," Marlene agreed, apparently not awake enough to be all there. "Floor pancakes."

"You're lucky you married me, Kinny," Gideon said, his voice teasing, but soft. "You're too weird for anyone else. I love you."

"Love you too," Marlene said fondly, but there was a trace of irritation in her voice. "Now shut up and let me sleep. I'm tired."


	22. Love Will Keep Us Alive (May 19th-26th, 2007)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Where there is morning s-e-x, the return of the Ninja Princess, and Agatha Black can go suck on her priorities.

It was _still_ ringing? Why hadn't anyone answered yet? They had to be home. It was an emergency.

Narcissa hung up and promptly dialled again, the number so familiar from dozens of times almost dialling it that even if she didn't have redial, she wouldn't have had to bother to squint through her tears. She had the number memorized anyway as she'd had it for ages, though she'd sworn she'd never call it. Not that it mattered now. It was family, and this was an emergency, and surely they'd see that.

Losing her patience at the lack of answer (it was still ringing, _again_ ), Narcissa balled the tissue in her hand into a fist and threw it ineffectually across the room. When the way if fluttered lightly to the ground didn't alleviate her stress, she flopped onto the bed and batted the alarm clock off of the end table angrily.

She completely forgot she even had the phone still to her ear until she heard a voice, and froze.

"Hello?" a harassed sounding Andromeda asked, shifting the phone as Dora hopped around her, hyper from a birthday party they'd just gotten back from. One of her friends had taught Dora the "Song that Never Ends" and she'd spent the drive home torturing her mother by singing it and singing it and _singing it_. Andromeda was beginning to wonder (as Dora stood on one of the kitchen chairs and started dancing round and round in circles) if the child would ever actually manage to tire herself out.

Panicking a little, Narcissa hung the phone up and dropped it on the bed. She stared at it a moment, thinking of how ridiculous it was to be afraid of calling your own _sister_ , and sniffling back a fresh set of tears. Family was so important to her, Yet between all of her father's infidelities and the siblings she probably had all over the place, and now _this_! This horrible, catastrophic _thing_ that was happening only one week before her wedding...

That was it. She needed the family she did have. So, Narcissa picked up the phone and pressed redial one more time, dabbing at her eyes with a fresh tissue as she waited.

"Yes, what?" Andromeda asked annoyed. "And someone better ruddy well answer me because there are sixteen missed calls from you in the last hour, and I _really_ don't want to do this sixteen more times."

"My mother filed for divorce this morning," Narcissa said, voice strained. "It is one week before my wedding, Andromeda, and I can't take this and it's going to ruin everything!"

"N-Narcissa?" Andromeda questioned, surprised.

"Yes, of course it is!" Narcissa wailed and buried her face in a pillow. Pulling herself together as best she could, she added (more than a little hysterically), "You have to come. You _have_ to, Andromeda. You and your daughter and your husband. You're practically the only family I have left and there has to be someone normal at my wedding, there has to. You'll come, won't you? Say you'll come. I need you."

"Come to your wedding?" Andromeda questioned. "Are you sure you want me there with your parents and everything else? Not that I wouldn't like to come Narcissa, dear, but wouldn't it just be a cause for unnecessary _drama_?"

"They know better than to cause a scene at my wedding, whatever the circumstances are," Narcissa said, the bratty only child in her coming through, along with a little surprise that Andromeda didn't know that. But then, she wouldn't. She didn't know Narcissa at all, and they were half-sisters. Narcissa didn't know her either, and she didn't know how to make her do this, make her come and make things seem normal and all right and comfort Narcissa like she always thought big sisters ought. She _needed_ that. "You have to come. I said I needed you."

"I. Well..." It all seemed a bit much for Andromeda. She hadn't spoken to Narcissa since the incident in Salcombe, although she'd started talking to Sirius soon after, and now did so on a weekly basis. The wedding wasn't a surprise--she'd planned on sending a card, at the least--but the out of the blue request of her presence was, and while she knew Ted would throw a fit when he got home and she told him, she knew she wasn't going to say no. If Narcissa wanted her for her sister, then how could Andromeda say no? "Okay. Yes, we'll come then."

"Tomorrow? Can you come tomorrow?" Narcissa pressed. "Only, the dress rehearsal is on Thursday and I have to have a dress made for Dora by then."

"A dress... for Dora?" Andromeda asked. This was getting stranger and stranger by the second. "Why?"

"Well, if you're going to be here anyway, I thought she could help Draco down the aisle," Narcissa said, still sniffling a little, though her voice was more apprehensive now than panicked. "He's a little young to be carrying the rings down on his own."

"O-oh," Andromeda said, furrowing her eyebrows. "Well I suppose we could get there tomorrow. I have to talk to Ted, but it should be fine."

"Oh, good. I'll make up the spare rooms," Narcissa said. "We're the only house with a gate on Capstone Way. You'll find us."

"Okay. I suppose we'll be seeing you tomorrow then," Andromeda said, her brain already turning to plan packing for Dora, herself and Ted, and for what she was going to say to convince Ted it was a good idea once he came home for supper.

"I suppose we will," Narcissa replied. After a short pause, she hesitantly added, "Thank you."

"You're welcome," Andromeda answered in a soft, kind voice. "And Narcissa, I hate to be a bother, really, but I just want to let you know, now that I think about it, that Dora's allergic to eggs. Swells up something gruesome when she's so much as in the same vicinity."

Narcissa frowned slightly at the thought of having to remove quiche from the appetizers, but really, crab cakes were a suitable substitute and not quite so heavy anyways. It was better that way, and she had time to tell the caterers. And of course, she could always get Dora her own special little cake without eggs in. She thought little girls probably loved things like that. "That can be accommodated. Tomorrow then."

And without further ado, Narcissa hung up. She felt immeasurably better already.

Lucius peered around the doorframe with Draco in his arms, who was happily babbling away to himself and half-sucking on Lucius' collar. "You look better," he said softly, at the same time Draco squealed "Mummmmama!"

"I called Andromeda. Her, Ted, and Dora are coming tomorrow," Narcissa said softly, rubbing at her red eyes and looking up at her soon-to-be husband.

Narcissa rarely cried. Lucius knew she rarely cried. But family was the one thing that mattered to her, the one thing worth crying over, and now it was all falling apart, just in time for the most important day of her life. She thought that justified a few tears. But Andromeda was coming now. It'd be fine, and she had Lucius and Draco. She would always have them. Smiling, she attempted a drawl as she propped herself up and looked at the two of them.

"What handsome men I have in my life. Come here."

Lucius came over and sat on the bed, setting Draco down so he could crawl to his mother. "Mama! Kiss!" he exclaimed, planting a big, wet, sloppy attempt at a kiss on her cheek.

"Hello Draco," she breathed fondly, touching a finger to his nose before scooping him into her arms and settling next to Lucius, leaning against him as Draco began to climb all over her. "Are there any pressing matters to attend to, or can we have a few moments to ourselves?"

"We're fine, love," Lucius said, pressing a much drier kiss to the top of Narcissa's head. "How do you feel?"

"Exhausted," she replied honestly, tossing her hair dramatically. Draco laughed and clapped and Narcissa awarded him a smile. "As if this wedding wasn't exhausting enough, and now my parents had to go and give me something else to deal with. Honestly."

"I'd hardly call a series of interviews exhausting, Cissa," Lucius commented, smiling slightly. "Unless you've been reliving each and every one of our clandestine little meetings for the reporters."

"Looking so beautiful every day and answering all sorts of personal questions _is_ exhausting," Narcissa replied, raising her eyebrows at him. "Everyone is just dying to know where we're going for our honeymoon, you know. Won't you tell me, Luce? Please?"

"I'm afraid everyone else will have to be surprised as well," Lucius said, miming zipping his lips. "I'm not telling. Draco?"

"Da?" Draco answered, his eyes wide, looking at his father innocently as he tried to put one of his socks--which he'd pulled off of his foot--into his mouth.

"Ta," Lucius said, smiling, and holding out his hand.

Draco pulled his sock out of his mouth and laughed, throwing it up in the air as if to say, 'if you want it, you're going to have to catch it!'

Narcissa laughed and smoothed a hand through his fine hair. "You monster. He's getting so big already. Still, it's good the Tonkses are coming. He's not quite big enough to be the ring bearer all on his own."

"Indeed," Lucius agreed, pretending to miss catching Draco's sock and pouting about it exaggeratedly. Draco laughed. "Tell me, Narcissa; are you pleased?"

"About what?" Narcissa asked, pulling her eyes away from her son to look curiously up at Lucius. When she didn't get caught up in the shocking things, she had a wonderful life. She was madly in love with Lucius, and loved Draco madly. She had a successful career that was still on the up, and she certainly didn't want for anything. Lucius knew that, and she couldn't imagine what he might be referring to. Of course she was pleased.

"With me. With this," Lucius said. "With the fact that we'll be married in a week's time. Anything and everything."

" _Pleased_?" she teased, stretching up to pull him into a passionate kiss. "I'm ecstatic. Save for my parents' divorce, my life is completely idyllic. Are you?"

"Very," Lucius answered. "I couldn't have imagined this for us that day you slinked into my office to seduce me, Narcissa. And I mean that in the best of ways."

Cissa laughed and kissed him again, and for a bit longer this time, until Draco made a whiny noise, presumably fussed about the lack of attention being paid to him. "Well. Aren't you glad I was such a sexually adventurous teenager."

"Glad indeed," Lucius agreed. "I love you, Narcissa."

"I love you too, Lucy," Narcissa replied.

"Too!" Draco said loudly, bouncing in his spot.

"Yes, yes. We love you too, of course, you silly boy," Narcissa said warmly. "Don't fuss."

***

"I still can't believe you talked me into this," Ted said gruffly, stepping out of the car and letting out a low whistle. "Jesus. Quite a place, isn't it?"

"So much as I imagined," Andromeda answered, getting out of the car and surveying it herself as Ted popped the boot and went for the luggage. "And it's because she's my sister, Theodore Tonks, and she's getting married."

"Does that mean she's my aunt?" Dora asked as he mother helped her out of her seat. "Do I call her Auntie Narcissa?"

"Yes, I suppose you do. Now go grab your knapsack from Daddy so we can go inside and meet everyone properly."

Once they were all situated, and the car was shut and locked, and everyone had a bit of luggage to carry, the three of them made their way to the front door. "I hope this is a good idea, Andie," Ted said.

"It is," Andromeda assured him. "Trust me."

Narcissa had been waiting in the sun room and she'd watched them pull in through the large bay window. When the finally began to make their way towards the house, she got to her feet and went to the door to answer it herself. Pulling it open before anyone even had a chance to knock, Narcissa smiled graciously and waved a greeting.

"Hello, Andromeda. Good to see you again," Narcissa said brightly. "And you must be Ted and Dora. It's a pleasure."

"Mummy, how can she be my aunt? She looks like she's Kirsty's sister's age," Dora asked curiously.

"You don't need to be old to be an aunt, Dora," Andromeda answered. "And behave. Hello, Narcissa."

"Hello," Ted chimed in awkwardly.

"I am behaving," Dora said with a bit of a huff. Being in the car that long didn't put her in the best of moods. "Hi, Narcissa. Your house looks like a life size doll house."

"Thank you," Narcissa said kindly to Dora. She supposed it was supposed to be a compliment. When she was that age, if she'd said something like that, it would've been. "Come on inside. I'll show you to the guest room. And don't mind the maid. She comes every Sunday and Wednesday. She'll be gone within the hour, I'm sure."

"A _maid_ ," Ted said in undertone to Andromeda. "And she's how old?"

Andromeda gave him an annoyed look and told him to shush.

Not feeling confrontational, Narcissa looked at Ted with a convincing expression of surprise. "My goodness, you don't actually clean your own house, do you? Andromeda, if you need money, all you have to do is ask."

Andromeda and Ted exchanged a look that was a cross between amused, appalled and confused, just as Dora said, "Mummy and Daddy are always complaining about money. When I asked to go to camp, Daddy told me that I sweated the pennies out of him."

"Dora!" Andromeda admonished.

Narcissa smiled at the girl and said, "Your Daddy must be something special if he can sweat pennies."

Dora seemed to consider this, and then turned to regard her father with an expression of newfound awe.

Narcissa silently congratulated herself at being naturally wonderful with kids, and then continued up the hall, pausing at the door to the guest suite. "There are two separate bedrooms and your own bathroom. Would you like time to get settled, or would you prefer tea first?"

"I want tea. Can I go drink tea with Auntie Narcissa, please?" Dora asked, reaching out and taking Narcissa's hand. "I want her to teach me to be pretty like her. And I want to meet the maid!"

"Go ahead," Andromeda said. "If you don't mind we'll just settle our things away and join you afterward."

Narcissa, slightly shocked at how quickly Dora took to her (she supposed she really must be naturally wonderful with children) but didn't hesitate before saying, "Take your time. We'll be in the sun room whenever you're ready. It's through the archway we passed in the entry."

And at that, Narcissa left two somewhat stunned grown-ups in her wake as she walked hand in hand with Dora.

"So you're Mummy's sister?" Dora asked, carefully. She wanted to make sure she got all of her facts straight. Mummy and Daddy thought she was too young to understand things, and she'd yet to be told _how_ exactly, Narcissa was her aunt. But Narcissa seemed cool, and Dora hoped she could sneak the answer out of her.

"I'm her half sister. We have the same father, but different mothers," Narcissa explained honestly. She didn't believe in sugar coating things for children. Her son was going to grow up knowing right from the beginning what was and what wasn't. Narcissa was particularly excited to attempt the 'this is Sirius and his life partner Remus' hurdle with him. There was a tea set already out on the table, and she was sure it was still warm. "How do you take your tea, Dora?"

Dora thought tea was gross, but Narcissa was talking to her like a grown-up, and she particularly wanted to impress Narcissa with just how grown-up she could be. "Five sugars, please," she said, and then, as an afterthought, tacked on, "And milk."

Narcissa smiled and added exactly five sugars and a fair bit of milk. If she said she wanted five, who was Narcissa to tell her no? (This dimly registered as, perhaps, not the best method to parent by, but since Dora wasn't her child and she tended to spoil Draco without reservation anyway, she let herself off the hook.) "So how old are you, Dora?"

"I'll be eight in one more month!" Dora said excitedly, bouncing in her seat (having taken the one Narcissa had pointed out for her) and taking her teacup. She sipped it right away and it was very, _very_ sweet and tasted very, _very_ good. Mummy probably wasn't going to be pleased.

"My, you're practically a little lady," Narcissa said, and winced at how much she sounded like any number of various grown ups in her life. "I have a favour to ask you, but first I want to now what you want most so that we can do a trade."

"Okay!" Dora said. "I like trades. Kelly at school traded me her wedding Barbie for my dentist Barbie, 'cause I'd rather be a bride than a dentist even though Mummy says that's silly because you're only supposed to be a bride _once_ but if you're a dentist you're a dentist for a really long time, but I don't fancy looking in people's mouths all the time because Todd at school tried to get me to kiss him once, and it was _really_ gross because he had chocolate in his teeth."

Narcissa laughed a little and then leaned forward and tapped Dora on the hand. "That's a... lovely story, but you didn't answer my question."

"Oh! Well. I want pink hair," Dora explained. "Mummy says that after I turn eight it'll be only five more years until I'm allowed to do it!"

"Well, if you promised not to tell your mother, you could have pink hair for one whole day if you agreed to do this favour for me," Narcissa offered and took a sip of her own tea. "It could be our own special secret."

Dora squealed. "Oh _thank you_ , Auntie Narcissa! When, when, _when_?"

"Next Saturday," Narcissa replied. "But just like you shouldn't do things for free that you can something for, you should also never, ever agree to anything when you don't know what it is first. A young lady is liable to get herself into trouble if she does that. Do you want to know the favour is?"

"Oh," Dora said thoughtfully. "I suppose I do. What do you want me to do, Auntie Narcissa?"

"I want you to walk with my son Draco down the aisle at the wedding to bring me and Lucius our wedding rings," Narcissa said. "You'd get to wear a pretty dress that you could even keep, and carry a basket of flowers too. How does that sound?"

She seemed to consider it for a moment. "And I get pink hair?" Dora asked.

"And you get pink hair," Narcissa answered simply. Dora seemed like the sort of girl who loved attention and pretty things, however, and Narcissa had the feeling that even without the bribe of pink hair, Dora would have agreed to be a part of the wedding.

"Ooh, I think Mummy's going to be _so_ mad," Dora said, but she sounded more excited about it that worried.

"It's better to ask forgiveness than permission, I've always found," Narcissa said with a sly smile. "Though that would probably make your mother quite mad too."

"Daddy says that Mummy can be stodgy sometimes," Dora agreed. "But I don't really know what that means."

Andromeda and Ted entered the room then, and Narcissa smiled a different, more wholesome smile. "It means your mother is very careful to do exactly what she thinks is best for you, and that she's sure to always keep you safe." Turning to face Andromeda and Ted, she gestured to the free chairs. "Take a seat. Oh, and Lucius expresses his regret that he couldn't be here to welcome you, but he had some pressing matters to attend to. I don't know _what_ exactly, as it's Sunday, but he couldn't tell me, so that means it has something to do with the honeymoon."

Andromeda took a seat and smiled slightly, glancing around the room. The size of the place was overwhelming; it had taken her and Ted five minutes to find the sunroom with Narcissa's directions. Looking at Narcissa then--it still seemed strange to think of her as Andromeda's little sister--Andromeda commented, "You seem much calmer today than you did yesterday on the phone, Narcissa."

"Oh yes. That," Narcissa said dismissively. "I've decided denial and avoidance are the best courses of action, at least until the wedding is over. There's no point in making a fuss and letting it ruin everything. I am glad you've all come, however. I have a fitting tomorrow morning that you and Dora simply _must_ attend."

"Is that for the pretty dress I'm going to get?" Dora asked, taking another gulp of her extra sweet tea.

"Dora, be polite," Andromeda said.

"It's fine for her to be excited. What little girl doesn't just love pretty dresses? I must have about a hundred of them, myself," Narcissa commented. "I modeled for a formalwear spread in Vogue a few weeks ago, and I couldn't help but purchase them all. I just love couture."

"You make good money modelling then, Narcissa?" Ted asked.

"Oh, certainly," Narcissa said. "But Lucius and I both come from old money. I think I'm the first woman in the last four generations of my family to even consider having a career. I'd be terribly bored without it, though. And it really is exciting. I'll be going to Paris for Fashion Week next year and doing a bunch of runway shows."

"Mummy, I want to be a model! Can I be a model?" Dora asked loudly. "Please, oh please? I'd be so good at it. I want fancy dresses and coo-tour! What's coo-tour?"

"You can be anything you want to be Dora," Andromeda said. "And I have no idea what couture is. Perhaps if you ask Auntie Narcissa nicely she'll explain it to us."

Solemn, but still bouncing, Dora turned to her aunt and asked, "Auntie Narcissa, could you please explain to me and Mummy what coo-tour is?"

"Couture is a fancy French word for _designer_. It means something has been specially designed by someone who is very, very good at designing things," Narcissa answered. "It's very pretty, and very expensive, and it will make you feel like a princess."

"Oh my gosh. I want some!" Dora squealed.

"Dora, why on earth are you so bouncy all of a sudden?" Andromeda asked. "When we got out of the car you looked ready for a nap."

"Dora looked guiltily from her aunt to her teacup and then at her mother and said, "Auntie Narcissa put five sugars in my tea."

"Now why on earth would Auntie Narcissa have done that?" Ted asked incredulously.

"That's how she said she took her tea," Narcissa replied.

"Of course she did," Ted said, looking at Narcissa like she was an alien or something. After a moment, though, he just smiled and shook his head, chuckling. "Well, I guess we know which side of the family Andie gets her crazy ideas from."

***

Dora stood in the fancy shop and looked around at all the pretty material. There were about twenty different colours of pink material, some of it shiny, some of it embroidered, some of it lacy. Oh, it was beautiful, and Dora had never had a dress special made for her before. She hoped it was pink!

"Is my dress going to be pink? Can it be pink?" she asked excitedly.

"No. Your dress is going to be the same colour as your mother's dress. A nice, pale green," Narcissa said over her shoulder as she bee-lined it to where she knew her dress hung, all carefully packed up in a protective bag. Satisfied that it had not mysteriously disappeared, Narcissa looked over her shoulder at them and noticed how Dora's face had fallen. "But you get to carry pink flowers. You'll look beautiful, I promise."

"Okay," Dora agreed. She liked green, and Aunt Narcissa was very glamorous, and she was sure if Aunt Narcissa had picked it out herself, it would be beautiful.

Andromeda had been glancing around the store distractedly, but seemed to snap to attention when Narcissa said, 'your mother's dress'. "My dress?" she asked, confused.

"Well yes, of course," Narcissa replied. "You have to match the rest of the bridesmaids. Don't worry, I have impeccable taste. It's a beautiful, draping, floor length number with some exquisite pearl detailing. A little like that one from Dior's newest collection, do you know it? Ah, Antonio, there you are! Kisses! Here are the last two!"

"Narcissa, you look radiant!" Antonio said as he breezed into the room. "And you are also a terrible bride, bringing them in so late. Do you think my world revolves around your wedding?"

"We both know it does, so don't pretend otherwise," Narcissa replied with a smile. "Antonio, this is my sister Andromeda and my niece Dora. Ladies, this is Antonio."

"Hold on a moment," Andromeda said. "I'm a bridesmaid?"

"Well I couldn't very well ask Bellatrix, could I? You've met that woman. She's impossible. And anyway, we don't have that sort of relationship," Narcissa said flippantly, and she specifically hadn't asked Andromeda so that the woman wouldn't have the chance to say no. "Dora, why don't you hop up here and let Antonio start to measure you?"

"Okay," Dora said hesitantly, still enthralled by the fancy fabrics. When Antonio began to flutter around her, she smiled at him and stuck her arms out straight like a scarecrow like she'd seen in the movies and chirped, "Hi, I'm Dora!"

"Oh, well," Andromeda said, unsure of what to say. After a beat she settled on, "Well you could've asked me earlier on."

"Well, I would have if you'd called me, honestly," Narcissa said, tossing her hair and giving Andromeda an amused, impatient look as though she couldn't quite believe Andromeda didn't understand that it just as much her own fault as it was Narcissa's, if not more. "Do I have to do everything?"

Andromeda resigned herself to her fate and rolled her eyes. "Honestly, you're impossible."

***

James groaned and slapped at the alarm clock. "It's inhumane of them to keep us up until one and then expect us to be awake and at theirs by nine. And what kind of people don't have separate parties before their wedding? Freaks, that's what. A formal cocktail party is no substitute for a stag party."

"Nnaugh," Lily agreed, speaking into her pillow. She was laying on her stomach. Pulling her head up and glancing at James blearily she wiped a bit of drool of her mouth and asked, "Time's it?"

"Just about eight," James replied. "We have to deliver Harry to Moony and pick up Padfoot yet, though. And make coffee."

" _Gross_ ," Lily complained, shifting so that she could snuggle into the crook of James' arm. "Fuck Narcissa and her lavish, insane, slightly frightening wedding. I've done more planning as her bridesmaid than I did as a bride."

Really, it wasn't that early. Just that James got up early all week, and he liked to sleep in weekends. The ceremony wasn't until three in the afternoon, so James didn't understand why they needed _five hours_ to get ready. Sitting up reluctantly, James leaned over and kissed Lily's forehead before saying, "Okay. I wager we've got about 20 minutes before Harry wakes up. I'll go shower and get the coffee on, so you can sleep a bit more and get ready while I'm dealing with the brat. We ought to leave by forty five of at the latest. Sound good?"

" _Or_ ," Lily said, sneaking to straddle James, wiggling her hips, "We can had a quickie, shower together, and then go from there."

James grinned wickedly and slid his hands up under Lily's night dress. "I think that's worth being late for."

***

"Buggering, fucking shit, that's what it is," Sirius complained, struggling into a pair of trousers. "Nine o'clock in the morning is not a sane hour to start getting ready for a wedding."

"They probably want to do a photo shoot or something before the ceremony," Remus said reasonably as he stretched languidly on the bed, watching Sirius get dressed. It was 8:30 and James and Lily would be there any minute. Remus ought to get up and get ready too, he'd be watching Harry all day. He supposed he could get ready for the wedding while Harry napped, as he'd rather lay back and watch Sirius then get up and be responsible. "You look rumpled and delicious at the moment, by the way. Almost edible."

"You can't say stuff like that to me," Sirius said. "I'm late. James and Lily'll be here in like, five seconds. I haven't showered."

"Mm. That _is_ a shame," Remus murmured and pushed the sheet down a little so it just barely kept him decent as he looked up at Sirius through lowered lashes. They'd both slept naked as they'd had sex after the cocktail party the night before. "I suppose I could always entertain myself, then."

"You _wouldn't_ , you _tease_ ," Sirius said, standing there now with his trousers pulled up but not done up, and naked otherwise. "Then again, yes you bloody well would, wouldn't you?"

Remus raised his eyebrows at Sirius for a moment, then closed his eyes and slid his hand under the sheet, exhaling a breath as his fingers danced across his own skin. "Come back to bed, Sirius. Just for a little while."

"You're such a bad influence," Sirius said softly, swallowing hard as he shimmied out of his trousers again. "And you know, you used to be so proper and reserved," he added, lifting the sheet and crawling back into bed.

"Yes, well," Remus said with a smile, moving immediately to nip at Sirius' neck. "Then I lost my virginity to you and I've not been the same since."

"If you give me a hickey, Narcissa'll string you up by your bollocks," Sirius admonished, although he leaned into Remus' mouth.

"I wasn't aware she had any say in our bedroom activities," Remus breathed, sliding a leg between Sirius' and rocking a little as he and teasingly bit harder.

"Mmm," Sirius said. "I'd reply with something suitably witty but I'm afraid you just shut down my brain."

"Fantastic," Remus said and smoothed one of his large, warm hands across Sirius' belly, then dipped it lower. This was the best way to start the day, to be sure. Weddings always put Remus in such a good mood.

***

Lily buzzed the door again, shifting Harry. "Taking them long enough, isn't it?" she asked James, smiling slighting and raising her eyebrow. "What do you think's a more likely situation: they slept in, or they're having s-e-x?" Harry had taken to repeating whatever was said in his presence, and so James and Lily had started spelling out certain words. Lily particular didn't think Narcissa would appreciate Harry squealing "Sex!" or some form of the word during her wedding ceremony.

"Dunno," James said. "Odds are s-e-x, though."

"Come up," Remus said finally into the intercom, pressing the buzzer to let them in the building. He was still naked, but figured he could scramble into his clothes fast enough to answer the door while Sirius got his stuff together in a rush. They had Harry, so they still had to wait for the elevator.

By the time the knock came on the door, Remus was wearing pants, a haphazardly buttoned shirt not yet tucked in, and opened the door with a guilty smile as he smoothed his hair down. "Sorry, my fault. Come on in, he's just about ready."

James snorted. "Yeah, I was totally right, Lils. And Moony, that button is wrong."

"Thanks," Remus said, cheeks pinking as he stepped back to let them in. "And right about what?"

"You two were totally having s-e-x, that's why you're late," James said smugly. "We both called it."

"Essee ecks!" Harry said brightly, repeating the sound.

"Bugger," Lily said. "Try and amuse him with another word, will you? He's latching onto the naughty ones something ridiculous, and you know how James and I both have potty mouths. Yesterday morning Dorcas was over watching him for me while I wrangled a few things together and she dropped a jar of preserves on her toe and, well. He spent the rest of the day saying s-h-i-t. Someone's going to think we're bad parents."

"Bugga! Grr," Harry exclaimed, giggling. "Bugga grr."

"That's my boy," James said proudly. "He can already pick out the important words."

Remus smiled and took Harry from her, heading to the kitchen to put on some tea. "Don't worry. I'll read to him. We'll find a fun, clean, nice word for him to mimic. Sirius? Are you almost ready? If you take any longer it isn't me Narcissa will want to string up. And put some pants on today, you exhibitionist. You're going to be wearing someone else's trousers!"

"Yes, yes!" Sirius exclaimed, hopping into the room as he tried to pull on a sock. His hair was mussed and he'd manage to pull his shirt on backwards, and he was indeed wearing pants, his own trousers draped across his arm. "You nymphomaniac," he said to Remus, standing straight up and kissing him on the cheek. "Hello, twerp," Sirius added to Harry, and made a face at him.

"Twert!" Harry clapped.

"Sorry for making you late," Remus replied to Sirius, his voice low as he caught Sirius by the arm and pulled him back for a proper goodbye kiss. Turning to address everyone (James and Lily were still standing by the door, a few feet away), Remus added, "I can't believe you two are standing up for Lucius. Have fun, anyway. I'll see you all at the church just before three."

"How're you getting there, mate?" James asked.

"Your parents are picking me up, actually," Remus answered.

"Right, bye. Love you," Sirius added, and kissed Remus hastily one more time before pulling on his trousers and shoes.

"I love you too," Remus replied with a slight smile. Sirius said it all the time, of course, but for some reason, every time he said it where other people could hear, it made Remus smile.

"Bye, Moony," James called, setting down Harry's enormous travel bag filled with anything and everything he might possibly need. "Have fun with Harry. Be a good influence!"

"I will. Now _go_ ," Remus insisted, rolling his eyes. "You're all late."

***

"Mmm, Aidan, wake-up," Hestia said, curled around him and speaking into the crook of his neck. "Wedding. Need to be clean."

"The wedding isn't until the afternoon," Aidan mumbled in reply, tightening his grip on Hestia comfortably. He'd been awake for a few minutes, but he was comfortable and he didn't really feel like getting out of bed, not when he had Hestia in it. "We don't have to leave until 1:30. We can sleep in."

"I suppose," Hestia said agreeably. "Hey, Aidan?"

"Yeah?" Aidan answered softly, lips quirking into a smile at her tone.

"I love you," she answered, kissing his neck.

Smile widening, Aidan replied, "I love you too."

From the next room came the muffled addition, "Oh, baby, I love you too! Oh, oh, _oh_!"

"Shove off, Kirk!" Aidan hollered in response.

"What a jackass," Hestia said, snuggling closer. "I can't wait to see you in your suit. You've never dressed up for me before."

"The only time a man ought to ever dress up is for weddings and funerals," Aidan quipped, quoting his father. "Of course, if you really like it, I might make an exception every so often."

"I'm sure you'll look smashing. And you get to see me in a dress! Enjoy it, Aidan, because it's a rarer occurrence than Haley's Comet," Hestia said. "Fuck, I have to shave my legs."

"You're pretty gorgeous no matter what you're wearing. Dress or not, you're still Hestia," Aidan said sappily, voice low enough for Kirk not to overhear.

"You're such a flatterer, Aidan Lynch," Hestia said, grinning into his shoulder blade. "I just hope you don't mind me wearing trousers when we get married," she added without thinking and then paused. "I mean. Shit. Well."

Aidan laughed and kissed Hestia. "It's okay. You can wear whatever you want, so long as you can convince my mother to let you."

"You really want to marry me someday?" Hestia asked.

"Well, there's certainly no one else I want to marry," Aidan said honestly.

Hestia sighed contentedly, and couldn't stop grinning. She felt so lucky to have a bloke as good as to her as Aidan. Being in love was so fluttery and wonderful and just _intoxicating_ ; Hestia didn't think she could ever possibly get enough of him. "God, I'm lucky," she said out loud.

Aidan pressed a kiss into her hair contentedly. "Yeah, me too."

"What, no shagging after the I love yous?" Kirk asked. "Oh, or are you just doing it really quietly?"

Rolling his eyes, Aidan amended, "We'll be even luckier once we get our own place."

"Yes," Hestia agreed. "I really liked that one we looked at yesterday. With the balcony."

"Yeah, it was nice," Aidan agreed. "There are still a couple more I really want to check out. Think we'll have time tomorrow afternoon after the 'Marital Bliss Brunch', or whatever Narcissa is calling it?"

"'Sunday High Tea', actually," Hestia said with a laugh. "But we could call it 'Marital Bliss Brunch' if you'd rather. And yes, we should have plenty of time."

"Okay. It's a date then," Aidan said, and then stretched. "And we should probably get up now. Christ, it's almost midday already. Lazy, lazy us."

***

"I feel like a Barbie or something," Dorcas commented, leaning to look in the mirror again as Sherry tried to finish her makeup. Sherry didn't even have to scold her again and Dorcas leaned back. "Sorry! It's just... I haven't had hair this normal since I was twelve. But I look fucking hot, right?"

"You look wonderful, Dorcas, I promise," Sherry insisted for what she was sure was the 100th time. Dorcas had been complaining that her hair looked all out of sorts for a wedding (since she hadn't dyed it since before she found out she was pregnant, and she had some impressive roots), and because she was a hairdresser, Sherry had been more than happy to fix it up for her. She'd ended up with a stylish, short style, with the hair longer in the front and shorter in the back and with bangs straight across her forehead. Now, Sherry was touching up her eye shadow while Anna put the finishing touches on the hem of Dorcas' dress.

"This'll snug around you quite nicely, Dorcas," Anna said from where she sat at the kitchen table.

"What time is it? If I'm going to do this, I want to do it right. I don't want Ed walking in before I'm all shiny and new," Dorcas said. "I want a proper, slow-motion, chick flick entrance, you know? So if he comes in early, one of you has to chase him off before he sees me."

Edgar, never one for good timing, chose that moment to open the door. "Rush!" he exclaimed thickly, half of a sandwich stuffed into his mouth, kicking off his shoes. Before he had time to look at either of the women properly, Sherry's hands were over his eyes and he was being pushed toward the basement steps.

"Get down there and get ready and don't come up again until we tell you it's okay," Sherry instructed, removing her hand. "You're not allowed upstairs."

"What? Why?" Edgar asked, confused.

"You're just not. Now go shower. You smell like vomit."

Edgar rolled his eyes. "Fine. Bloody women and your mysterious... _things_. Not my fault some kid upchucked all over the stairwell!" he shouted up at them as he climbed down the rest of the stairs. He headed into the bathroom immediately, stripping as he went.

"Watch your mouth, Edgar Bones!" Anna called after him.

"What if he takes one look at me, decides I'm not Dorcas anymore, and runs for the fucking hills?" Dorcas asked dramatically, even though she knew full well he wouldn't, and if he ever tried she'd beat the shit out of him herself on the principle alone.

Sherry snorted, settling back down in front of Dorcas again and reaching for the mascara. "You know he won't. He doesn't care what you dress like, or look like, Dorcas, he just loves you for who you are."

"He likes to show you off," Anna chirped in.

Dorcas blinked into the mirror. "I look like my mother. Except young and pretty and not a total cunt." A smile broke out on her face. "I feel like I'm playing dress up. I need a naughty secretary outfit with this get up."

"And there, finished," Anna said, dutifully ignoring Dorcas' quip about naughty secretary costumes. Dorcas had been living with them for some time, and Anna (as had the rest) had learned to take Dorcas' shock value in stride. Shaking the dress out gently, she handed it to Dorcas with a smile. "Look at that now, isn't it lovely?"

"Thanks. I'll be right back," Dorcas said and took the dress from Anna, heading up the stairs. She made her way into the master bedroom and laid the dress out on the bed, undressing carefully so as not to mess up her new hair or makeup. She unzipped the dress, pulling it on equally carefully, and then went to stand in front of the only full length mirror in the house. Dorcas always figured she wouldn't be caught dead in anything with ruffles, but the dress Edgar's mother had made her was a nice royal blue, empire-waisted, and hung just below her knees. It was vaguely southern belle, and the square neckline was flattering on Dorcas. With her new, shorter hair, and her makeup done all nice, she looked like she'd fit right in at the country club. Even with the colourful star tattoos on her neck and ankle visible. She looked like a totally different person.

Stepping into the shoes and picking up the handbag, Dorcas almost laughed. It just felt a little surreal, like when she was six and had played in her sister's closet for hours, coming out looking like a kid who wanted to be older.

Sherry knocked lightly on the door. Coming inside she said, "Oh _Dorcas_ , you look wonderful! And look at that," she added coming over and touching a hand to Dorcas' pregnant belly. "It shows off your bump so nice. I brought you a compact and some lipstick. Thought you might like to put something in your purse."

"I guess it would be pretty pointless to carry it around empty," Dorcas said with a smile. "Is Ed out of the shower yet?"

"Yes," Sherry said. "I listened down the steps and heard the hairdryer going, so he should be ready soon. Nervous?"

"Nah, not really," Dorcas said with a shrug. "Mostly I just want to see his face. His jaw is going to hit the fucking _floor_ , man."

"He'll definitely be surprised," Sherry agreed. "He's so used to seeing you with long, red hair. Has he actually ever seen it without red in it?"

"Nope," Dorcas said with an excited grin. She still loved shocking people. That hadn't changed. "Though I put a little blue in too, for a while. It washed out pretty fast, though. He's never seen me with anything but my roots blonde."

"Well then he's hardly going to recognize you," Sherry grinned back.

"Dorcas! Sherry! Am I allowed to let Edgar upstairs now?" Anna called up to them.

"No, he can wait down there. I'll come down," Dorcas shouted back and then turned to Sherry. "I didn't smudge anything, did I?"

"No, you look fine," Sherry said. "Everything's in place, and no doubt you'll knock his socks off."

Dorcas smiled and then headed out of the room, forgetting about her proposed slow motion entrance and peeking down the stairwell before stepping out and coming down the stairs quickly, not stopping until she was standing in front of Ed with an expectant (and a little nervous) smile.

As predicted, Edgar's jaw dropped. "I. You. _Wow_."

"Do you like it then?" she asked, spinning in a circle. "I'm a little disappointed my mother's going to get to see me dressed like she always wanted me to dress, but it was high time to try something new anyway."

"You look _amazing_ ," Edgar said. "Not that you haven't always looked amazing, of course--and your hair is all gone!"

"Why thank you," Dorcas said and kissed him, forgetting she was wearing lipstick until she pulled away and Ed's lips where smeared a warm, dusty pink. She left the colour on and reached a hand up to twirl a finger in his loose hair. "Oh, and just because I've cut mine doesn't mean you're allowed to cut yours, for the record. You look sharp, by the way. I like the tan with blue instead of boring black with white."

"Well you know I don't like boring," Edgar said, grinning widely. "You know, I admire you. I'd never cut my hair willingly. I've been growing it out since I was 13."

"I know," Dorcas said, rolling her eyes. "You and your hair. You're such a fucking girl."

"Hey, shut up," Edgar said. "You like it."

"Oh, I love it," Dorcas purred and leaned in for another kiss.

"He's wearing all of your lipstick now, Dorcas," Sherry tutted as she and Anna exchanged amused looks.

"Fuck," Dorcas swore. "This makeup thing is going to get really annoying really fast."

***

"Dora," Andromeda started warningly, looking at her daughter with her eyebrows raised. "What did you convince Auntie Narcissa to do to your hair?"

"It was absolutely essential," Narcissa replied swiftly. "I couldn't have a flower girl that didn't have hair to match her flowers. What a preposterous suggestion."

Elladora snorted. "You're such a bloody brat, Cissa."

Andromeda, honestly, was too tired to argue. She'd been quick to discover that being Narcissa Black's sister was a very exasperating and tiring thing. "At least tell me it's temporary."

"It'll be gone in two shampoos, I promise," Narcissa said with a swift smile.

"Isn't it pretty, Mummy? Don't you just love it, don't you Mummy?" Dora asked excitedly. " _I_ love it. I love it a lot and I want it forever."

"When you're older you can dye it whatever colour you please," Andromeda said in surrender. "But after two shampoos it'll be back to brown and _staying_ that way until you're 13."

Glancing at Alice, Lily said, "Don't you think that Dorcas would just love this child?"

"Dorcas is the one with hair that's red like a fire engine, right?" Dora asked. "Sirius told me about her. I can't wait to meet her."

"Well her hair isn't very red anymore," Lily explained, hoping Dora wouldn't be too disappointed. "She's having a baby, so she can't dye it anymore."

"She's having a _baby_?" Dora asked excitedly. "I _love_ babies. I got to met Draco, and he's still a baby, and I get the extra special job of making sure he goes down the aisle okay and takes the rings to that man I met earlier, what was his name again, Mummy? The French one?"

"The sexy dreamboat?" Elladora interjected with a predatory look in her eyes. "That was Sebastien. I've been meaning to ask if he's available. Cissa? Single? Or married but unsatisfied?"

"Don't talk about scandalous things around children," Alice scolded.

"I thought you were dating that work friend of Potter's, anyway. Sturgis something," Narcissa said. "Don't be such a tart, Ella. At least not in front of Dora."

"What's a tart?" Dora asked.

"It's a word you're not allowed to use," Andromeda said, frowning.

***

The wedding was beautiful. Of course. There were photographers everywhere, and even a couple reporters camped out front. Everything was perfect, right down to the weather. Narcissa looked pleased as shit, and Dorcas couldn't help but feel glad for her. Obviously everything going as planned was important to her, and Dorcas thought it was nice that she got what she wanted on her wedding day. Not that Dor would say so out loud. All that would do was perpetuate the silly opinion that she was going soft and growing up.

As Dorcas and Edgar finished their fourth forced-polite conversation with people who know her because of her parents, Dorcas swore colourfully under her breath, though she didn't mind altogether much. She'd been dropping little outrageous details (about her sex life, or about her home life, or little lies she knew wouldn't really phase anyone but the snobbish folk like her parents) that she was sure would just kill her mother if they ever got back to her, and Dorcas viciously hoped each and every one did.

"I have to meet and greet with all the hoity-toity of the town who just want to get all the scandalous details on the wayward daughter of the Meadows, and I can't even be drunk for it. Fucking sucks, Bonesie," Dorcas complained. "How'm I doing, though? Do you think the comment about having to lay off the bondage out of care for the baby was too much?"

Edgar laughed, grinning, his arm tucked happily around Dorcas' waist. "You're lucky I don't care what people think of me, Dor," he said. "The bondage was one thing, but the edible paint? That was _classic_."

"What can I say? I'm a creative genius," Dorcas said with a smirk, turning to wrap her arms around Ed, kissing him with little regard to propriety.

Edgar grinned into their kiss and muttered against her lips, "Seafood doesn't make you queasy, does it? They have shrimp kebabs."

"Edgar Bones? Just what _are_ you doing?" The voice was clipped, annoyed and high and mighty, and Edgar was surprise to look over Dorcas' shoulder to see her mother and father on the other side.

"Excuse me?" Edgar asked.

Dorcas turned around and glared at her mother. She had not been looking forward to running into her, and even if she'd known it would happen eventually, Dor's stomach still did a nervous little flip. She hadn't seen either of her parents since the country club when they'd told her to move out, and now here they were. Her parents. Yelling at her boyfriend.

"He was kissing me until you interrupted, what the fuck did it look like?" Dorcas snapped.

"Dorcas?" Joanne asked, looking at her daughter with confusion. "Oh, that's. Your father and I thought you were someone different."

"Yeah, I look great, right? Just how you always wanted me to look," Dorcas retorted. "Well, I didn't do it for you. In fact, it doesn't have anything to _do_ with you. I did it because it was time for a change, and because Ed loves me regardless."

"You look beautiful, Dorcas," Daniel said, smiling at his youngest daughter. "You look so ladylike and grown up."

"And _pregnant_ ," Joanne added quietly, glancing down at Dorcas' stomach with slight discomfort. "I did call."

Edgar raised an eyebrow and said, "Suggesting we get rid of it."

"Suggesting discretion," Daniel corrected, giving Edgar a stern look. "Dorcas, you have to understand where your mother and I are coming from. Can't you see how this reflects on us?"

Dorcas raised her eyebrows, took Ed's hand and squeezed, and said, "You and your snobby friends are the only ones that care. I think you ought to worry more what it says about you that you're willing to abandon your daughter. So suck on that."

"Dorcas, you are too _young_ , naive and frivolous to be someone's _mother_!" Joanne hissed. "And trapping this boy into a relationship with you through something like this is pure stupidity and cruelty!"

Edgar couldn't help it. He laughed. "You're seriously suggesting Dorcas got pregnant on purpose?"

"I mesmerized him with my boobs. It's just lust, right, and he was dumb enough to get himself caught up in it," Dorcas snapped, glaring at both of her parents. "You two don't know the first thing about love, do you? Have you ever even been in love? Do you even love each other? It isn't about how you look, or what's proper. It's about what's best. He wouldn't let me drop out of school because he wanted me to get an education. Did you know that? When I still puked four times a day, he sat with me _every single time_. You can go fuck yourself if you think I would ever do something like this on purpose. I love him, and he loves me. And this isn't going to be easy, but we're going to do it. Together. And I don't want you involved. At all. Don't contact me again, or I'll file for emancipation."

"Dorcas!" Daniel exclaimed, looking around quickly. "Don't be ridiculous."

"Oh, what, you can throw me out because I'm not the perfect little girl you want me to be, and then you can call me and leave a message about how you want me to come home so you can pressure me into abortion--don't you deny it, that's what you meant--and I'm not allowed to want a little peace from you?"

"You are ungrateful of everything we've ever offered you," Joanne said quietly. There was stiffness in her tone, but she looked close to tears. "You two can't raise a child together. You can hardly take care of yourselves!"

"Okay, that's enough," Edgar said. "You don't know me, for one thing, so please, don't bother telling me what I can and can't do. Secondly, if you'd had faith in your own kid to begin with, you wouldn't have this _horrible_ , embarrassing situation to deal with. _We_ have accepted the consequences of our actions, and _we're_ having a baby whether it fits into your ideal of Dorcas or not."

"Young man don't you _dare_..." Joanne began, but Edgar held up his hand.

"No. You're just saying the same things to us over and over again. And please, don't call our house again leaving coded, insinuating messages on our answering machine. It upsets _my_ parents. You know, the ones who are actually helping us, rather than pointing fingers at us and calling us names?" Edgar couldn't help it. He wasn't outspoken. He wasn't rude. He was a nice boy. But Dorcas' parents had hurled one too many insults in their direction, and they had to learn to understand that whether they liked it or hated it, he, Dorcas, and Dorcas' pregnant belly were a family now.

Dorcas stood up straight, put one hand on her softly rounded belly, leaving the other clasped in Edgar's own, and looked at her parents. "I don't need you. I was so scared when you threw me out and all this started and I had no idea how I was going to do it on my own. I was terrified. But I'm not on my own. I have Ed, and I have Ed's family, and we have a plan, and I'm going to be fine. I don't need you, and if all you're going to do is make things harder for us, than you can just leave us the fuck alone."

Joanne looked like she wanted to say something, or perhaps burst into tears, but Dorcas didn't care. She'd had enough of being guilted by her parents. She liked who she was. She was happy and in love and yeah, she had a lot on her plate, but she and Ed could handle it.

"Come on, Joanne," Daniel said softly, giving Dorcas a sad sort of look. "We have others we need to talk to."

Joanne licked her lips. Her chest felt heavy and her heart was beating fast. She wanted to say screw propriety and throw her snooty persona to the wind. She wanted her little girl back... and she wanted to help her. Her Dorcas was more grown up than she'd ever been. Edgar Bones was right about one thing; she and Daniel had brought this on themselves by pushing her so hard to be what they wanted her to be.

"Oh, _Dorcas_ ," she said softly, tears trickling down her face. "God. I'm so sorry."

Dorcas stepped away from her mother. How could she just think that as soon as Dorcas was okay without them, she could cry her way back into Dorcas' life, after all she'd done? She had no idea what she'd put Dorcas through, the selfish cow, and Dorcas was nowhere _near_ accepting her apology. "Father is right. You should leave. And I was serious about filing for emancipation. Don't contact me again."

Joanne closed her eyes. She took a deep breath, cleared her throat and wiped her tears away. Daniel took her arm forcefully, and as he led her away she said, her voice regaining the stiff, formal--if now hollow---sound, "Good luck."

Dorcas watched them go, eyes lingering on the spot they'd been standing long after they disappeared into the crowd. She wrinkled her nose and looked up at Ed. "I did the right thing, right?"

"Yes," Edgar answered without a second thought. "They need to learn to take you as you are, rather than, you know. Not at all. I think your mother might be starting to realize that."

"Right," Dorcas agreed, exhaling and relaxing all the tension she hadn't noticed in her shoulders. "I'm fine, you know that? I'm totally fine."

"No you're not," Edgar said, smiling. "Neither am I. But I have a feeling that we will be. It's just stress and anxiety, and perfectly understandable panic. I mean... Dorcas? I'm _petrified_ to be a dad. What if I fuck it up?"

Dorcas rolled her eyes and gave him a teasing smile. "Shut up. You'll be an amazing dad. You pretty much have the gene for Dad of the Year programmed right into you. I'm the one who grew up with crappy role models and who swears too much and who didn't even know what responsibility fucking was until it started growing in her fucking belly. You'll be fine. It's me we have to worry about, so don't you go thinking you're allowed to freak out too." She leaned up onto her tip toes and kissed him quickly before continuing, "Seriously, though. We'll be fine."

"I know," Edgar said quietly, putting his hand on her stomach. It still didn't and probably never would cease to amaze him that his child was growing inside of her, that they'd made a baby who was going to grow and be real and be a little bit of both of them. It was so scary, and intimidating and just... _scary_ and _wonderful_ all at once. He rubbed his thumb over Dorcas' bump and grinned at her.

"Hey Ed?" Dorcas whispered, raising her eyebrows at him. "Stop being a sentimental sop and let's go grab a drink. I'm fucking parched."

***

"Okay," Sirius whispered, trying not to look obvious and devious as Elladora prattled on about how wonderful and beautiful Narcissa was. "So, I'll climb up then, and you snag it and toss it up to me?"

"Sounds good," James answered with a grin. "Now go on. Sebastien's not watching, I can grab it now."

With that, James turned away from Sirius and made his way towards the head table, leaning past Sebastien to grab a glass of champagne, nodding at them and hoping they wouldn't notice he'd nicked the mic in the process. Walking away quickly, James took a gulp of his newly acquired champagne before setting it down and hurrying to the huge archway Narcissa had had installed over the entrance.

Sirius was perched atop it, people around watching him curiously, when James whistled shortly, then chucked the wireless mic right at his head before starting to climb up the arch awkwardly, hoping the thing wouldn't break under the weight of both of them.

"Ladies and Gentlemen!" Sirius announced loudly, grinning into the mic as _everyone_ turned to look at him. "Hello! I'm Sirius, the bride's annoying cousin, and one of the groom's former annoying students! This," he added, as James plopped down beside him, "is James, who might as well have been the bridge's annoying cousin growing up, and who was also one of the groom's students. We are here to inject some life into this pre-rehearsed bore-fest!"

James waved brightly, leaning close to the microphone and quipping, "Hi there! Great party, really. Just needs a little spice!"

Remus turned sharply at the sound, pausing mid-conversation. He'd been talking to Lily, and they both exchanged a look. Remus muttered, "Oh _no_. She'll kill them both. Idiots."

James smiled down at Lily and Remus, who were now both standing only a few feet away, and blew a cheery kiss to them both.

"James! Sirius!" Lily called up to them. "Behave yourselves!"

"Never!" Sirius called back. "So. Where to start? Something embarrassing is always good, like the time when we were three and we were swimming in my old wading pool, and Narcissa peed in it. Or how about that time when we were... I _think_ eight, and Cissa had to sing O Holy Night at church at Christmas, and _burped_ right in the middle of it?"

"Now, now. We shouldn't be too mean," James said, taking the mic from Sirius. "Although, the fact that she had sexual education class with the professor she ended up shagging _is_ pretty funny. See, Narcissa has a lot of really good stories. Know why? She is secretly one _really_ funny girl. Isn't that right, Sirius?"

Just then, Narcissa stormed in from the gift room, glaring up at the two boys, Lucius and Sebastien in tow. "I told you to watch the microphone at all times! Did you think I was kidding when I said they would do something stupid?"

"I was watching it. And relax, everyone tells embarrassing stories at weddings," Sebastien said in his posh French accent, giving Narcissa his most charming smile.

"Smiling isn't fixing it. Lucy, you and Sebastien have to fix this. Now," she said, stopping at the bottom of the archway and glaring up at Sirius and James. "Sirius Black and James Potter, get down here _now_!"

"No!" Sirius called back laughingly. "And James is right, Narcissa is one _funny_ bird, I'll tell you what. Like that time she was in labour, and Remus and I had to take her across from East Portlemouth on the ferry, and she forced us to make everyone on the ferry sing show tunes to her so she'd be distracted from her contractions. You haven't seen _anything_ until you've seen Narcissa half-laughing and half-crying at 30 of us singing Camptown Races."

Lucius, smiling slightly, looked at Narcissa, cocked an eyebrow and asked, "Show tunes, Cissa?"

"I was _distraught_!" she said, making the mistake of looking over at Lucius. Her mouth twitched into a small smile before she fought herself back under control. Sebastien was snickering on Lucius' other side and she gave the two of them a stern look. "You try being in labour on a ferry and tell me how you deal with it."

James, for his part, had started singing the Camptown Races song in the background. Even if he hadn't been there, he knew the song and he'd heard the story from Sirius and Remus loads of times. There was a ripple of laughter throughout the crowd.

"And there was another time, when James and I went to visit her after she'd had Draco, and we caught her making silly mummy faces at him and _cooing_ ," Sirius continued. "Or when Lily brought Harry over for a day and when she came back to get him he and Draco were dressed like cowboys."

"Being a mother is not embarrassing," Narcissa said, but she was blushing nonetheless and she shot a defiant look at Lucius, as though daring him to say anything.

"Look, the actual point of all this isn't just to brass off the bride," James said with a smile. "What we really want is to congratulate the happy couple. Of course, we also want to get this party moving. Personally, I suggest tequila shots. What else is an open bar for, right? And come on, people. Step up to the tradition. Anyone with embarrassing stories of the bride or groom, bust them out! Though, that's not to suggest we're at all finished."

Lucius' hand was over his mouth and he was chortling. Sebastian beside him was giggling, "Cowboys!"

"She played ninjas with us once! She really did!" Sirius said, and then looked at James and screwed up his face. "Wait, didn't she say she'd bake us into cookies or something if we ever told people that?"

"Our fingers. Into biscuits," James said. "And she wasn't just any old ninja. She was a ninja princess!"

"That is a total misrepresentation!" Narcissa snapped, reaching over and pinching her husband even as she fought to keep a grin off of her own face. "And anyway, I was a child!"

"Yes, you were," James said. "But the point is, you are a real girl. Just like all the people here are real people. Why do we have to play at being stuffed up old codgers when we should be celebrating?"

Narcissa thought for a moment, and then smiled. "How about this. I will do a shot of tequila with you if you'll come down from there and stop behaving like buffoons."

"I can't guarantee I won't act like a buffoon," Sirius answered, "but I'll come down! The bride is going to do a tequila shot with us!" he added to everyone in the microphone. "I'm proud to say I assisted in corrupting her childhood, and making her the _interesting_ woman she is today."

"Just shut up and get down!" Narcissa snapped, laughing a little.

James laughed and grabbed the microphone from Sirius, tossing it down to Lucius before starting to climb down. "Lighten up, Narcissa. You're a married woman today."

"I don't even like tequila, I'll have you know," Narcissa replied archly, her hands on her hips. "And I can't _believe_ you two. Just who do you think you are?"

Sirius reached over and grabbed Narcissa forcefully, pulling her toward him and planting a big, wet, obnoxious kiss on her cheek. "We're the blokes that keep you sane with insanity," he said as James threw an arm around her as well and they started walking her to the bar. "And you totally love us."

Narcissa rolled her eyes and shot an amused but desperate look at Lucius. "You are not allowed to drink any more alcohol tonight. You must be sober enough to save me from myself. There's no telling what these two are going to do to me. Don't let me embarrass myself, Luce. Promise?"

"Me?" Lucius questioned, grinning playfully, a little tipsy himself from too much champagne. " _Never_."

"Come on, to the bar, that's right," James urged, grinning. As they approached, James called to the bartender, "You heard the lady. Three shots of tequila!"

When the glasses were set in front of them, Sirius handed one to Narcissa, and took one himself as James grabbed his. Waggling his eyebrows he said, "On the count of three then. One. Two. Three!"

Narcissa tipped the shot glass back, swallowing and then shaking her head. "Oh my gosh!"

James swallowed his own and then pulled a face at the taste. "Whoa-ho! Care for another?"

"No, certainly not," Narcissa said, giving them both reproving looks. "You are bad enough influences as it is, and I have a tea to host tomorrow morning."

Sirius smacked his glass on the table and said, "Fuck tea! You're having another, c'mon!"

"Lucius!" she called laughingly as the bartender poured three more.

"Oh, would Lucius like one too? Come on, old boy. You're part of the gang now," James hollered over his shoulder, grinning wildly. It was hardly even weird anymore that Malfoy used to be their teacher, and tonight especially it didn't matter. Weddings were special occasions.

"I've never been one to turn down tequila," Lucius said, taking a glass from Sirius. "And I might as well drink it since I'm paying for it."

"Exactly!" Sirius agreed. "Now down the hatch!"

"Hang on, hang on, hang on," James said, and raised his glass. "To happily ever afters, and getting Narcissa drunk in public. Cheers!

Narcissa smacked his arm, but dutifully raised her glass and downed the second shot, covering her mouth. It was good tequila, but it still burned. "Okay. Now I've done two, and you must let me get back to my other guests."

"Oh, what, you mean the hundreds of people you hardly even know? Come on, Narcissa. Do one more with us. We can drink to all the youthful adventures we had," James said, pulling her back as she tried to leave. "What do you think, Luce? One more, maybe two?"

"Or five, or ten," Lucius offered.

"Good man!" James laughed.

"Lucy!" Narcissa wailed, dropping her face into her hands. "You are already a terrible husband."

"Oh, don't be so dramatic," James said with a grin, nodding to the bartender to pour another. "And don't say mean things you don't mean at your wedding. Another!"

***

"What a _complete_ disgrace!" Agatha Black moaned. "As if the Black family weren't tarnished enough with heathens, homosexuals, divorce and bastard children, Narcissa, dear! Getting drunk at your wedding reception was _hardly_ an appropriate choice of action."

"She could lecture the bloody branches off of a tree," Sirius said to Remus, re-adjusting his sunglasses against the bright morning sunshine (that hurt a million times as much with the help of his _own_ hangover). "Trollopy old cow."

"Agatha, darling," Narcissa drawled, looking up at the woman from where Narcissa was elegantly sprawled, relaxed and boneless in a lounge chair. "I am happy. I'm happy and hungover, and it is my wedding weekend. I know you are family, and I know you think you have my best interests at heart, but I don't have to talk to you, not this weekend, not if I don't want to. And I don't. So stop screeching at me."

Edelynne, who was sipping tea and talking to Rachel Potter a few feet away, snorted and smiled proudly. "She's so her mother's daughter, isn't she?"

Narcissa got up, blew a kiss at her mother, scooped her son up from where he stood trying to steal some of Sirius' breakfast, and strutted over to where Lucius sat, talking with his parents and Sebastien. She sat gracefully down in Lucius' lap, nestled her son in her own (he promptly contented himself with pulling on Sebastien's tie), and said languidly, "Good morning, husband."

"Why, good morning, wife," Lucius answered, kissing her lightly on the cheek.

"Good morning Abraxas, Lenora," Narcissa said with a content smile, nodding at Lucius' parents. "I apologize, Sebastien. Draco must get his fashion sense from me, and that is a beautiful tie."

"Why thank you. It was a gift," Sebastien replied easily, content to let Draco play. "You look beautiful this morning. The tequila treated you well last night?"

"Indeed. I seem to have fared a fair bit better than James and Sirius," Narcissa replied.

"That's because you dumped the last five of your shots in a ruddy flower pot!" Sirius shouted over at Narcissa, and then winced, holding his head with his hand. Turning to Remus he said, "Don't yell. It hurts."

Lenora smiled, sipping her tea and said to Narcissa, "Your cousin is a colourful sort. The Agatha woman... she's his mother?"

"Yes," Narcissa answered, but sent a dark look in Agatha's direction. "Technically. She disowned him because of his sexual preference. She just doesn't understand about family."

"What exactly do you mean?" Sebastien asked, his accent smooth. Narcissa loved a French accent, and wished Lucius had picked one up while living in France. Draco had let go of Sebastien's tie and had now picked up a teaspoon, so Sebastien leaned back in his chair, his attention on the conversation.

"You don't give up on family," Narcissa said, sighing and brushed her fingers through Draco's pale, softly curling hair. "There is never any reason good enough to give up on family."

"You have the right idea where I'm concerned," Lenora said. "The restrictions of 'high class' can cause us all to forget what's really important. I commend you for having the courage not to let your family fall apart."

"Why thank you, Lenora," Narcissa replied. She liked Lucius' parents. They were classy, kind, and they seemed to like her well enough as well, even if Abraxas was very quiet. Before she could really respond to Lenora's statement, Andromeda walked out from the house. Narcissa raised her arm and waved her over. "Speaking of, I would like you to meet my half sister Andromeda. Andromeda, this is Abraxas and Lenora, Lucius' parents."

"Hello," Andromeda said, smiling slightly. "Pleasure."

"The pleasure's all mine," Lenora replied, and Abraxas nodded. "My husband only speaks when he deems it absolutely necessary. It makes for rather boring dinners."

Andromeda laughed. "Well my husband only speaks when he has a smart arse comment to make, but our daughter makes up for him because she doesn't _stop_ talking. Speaking of Dora, Narcissa, tell me you've seen her. She's been hiding from me because she needs a bath and doesn't want to lose that pink hair."

"She's under the pastry table. I've seen a hand pop up every so often to steal éclairs," Narcissa said with a smile. "Don't tell her I told you."

"Narcissa is very keen on being the cool aunt," Sebastien explained to Lenora. "You noticed the flower girl's pink hair, I assume? That was Narcissa's doing."

"It looked lovely with her flowers," Lenora said, as Andromeda excused herself to go get Dora. "I don't imagine her parents were overly pleased, however?"

"They're like everyone else, Mother," Lucius interjected as Draco squirmed and then reached out for his grandmother, saying 'up!' "Narcissa gets her way and makes you think it was your own idea. It's a special, slightly frightening, talent of hers."

As soon as Draco was lifted off her lap by Lenora, Narcissa shifted a little so she could look up at Lucius. "He's right. And I hate it when I don't get my way. Lucy, where are we going on our honeymoon?"

"You'll find out tomorrow, Cissa, as I told you," Lucius said, standing his ground. Their flight left early the next morning and Lucius was _determined_ to surprise her, for once. They were staying at a posh, five star hotel in the south of France while his parents took Draco home with them. After their week in the south they'd spend a week at his parents' summer home with them and Draco, and Narcissa would be back in plenty of time for her fall photo shoot with Vol de Mort.

"Lucius!" Narcissa huffed, dropping her head back onto his shoulder. "But I want to know now."

"Perhaps for now you ought to simply enjoy marital bliss," Sebastien suggested with a wry smile. "You're sweet husband is doing something nice for you. Stop trying to ruin it."

"You have the rest of our lives together to con me into giving into your every whim and pleasure, Narcissa," Lucius said. "Do let me win occasionally."


	23. Blackbird (June 2nd-15th, 2007)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Where Dorcas makes friends with fear, Edgar learns what it takes to _really_ forgive monumental hurt, and baby Bones gets a gender.

Edgar pressed the roller to the wall, the second layer of smooth, pale yellow paint clinging to the first. He and his father had finished converting the storage room for the nursery, and since the walls were ready and he'd had a weekend free, Edgar had decided to get a head start. He and Dorcas had decided on yellow to be ambiguous, since they weren't sure if they wanted to find out whether it was a boy or a girl, or if they wanted to be surprised. He had all of the furniture except for the crib finished and sitting in the garage waiting to be sanded and stained, which included a change table, a dresser, and a rocking chair.

He couldn't help but be excited. The more he did for the baby, and the bigger Dorcas got (which still wasn't overly huge, since she wasn't even at 20 weeks yet), and the more aware he seemed to become of the fact he was going to be a father, the broader his smile got and the happier he seemed to be. Take now, for instance. There he was painting in his coveralls, his hair pulled back in a bandanna, grinning like an idiot and singing 'Blackbird' along with the CD player that was sitting on the floor.

"Blackbird singing in the dead of night," he sang, reaching up to the edge of the painters tape. "Take these broken wings and learn to fly. All your life, you were only waiting for this moment to arise..." He glanced backward as he pulled the roller away from the wall, and grinned at the doorway. "How long have you been standing there?"

Dorcas stared, eyes wide. Ed was grinning and singing and painting their nursery. _Painting_ their _nursery_. It seemed like the realer it got for him, the happier he got. Dorcas was happy, mostly. Except that the realer it got for her, the scarier the whole situation was, and it was just as much the difference in their reactions as anything else that had her so freaked out. She was really starting to feel those four years between them, like they were going to opposite extremes. He got older, she got younger. He got braver, she got more and more scared. He was getting ready and setting things up and she was just... panicking.

Some little part of her brain knew that wasn't quite true. She was dealing with it. She was even growing up a little too, everyone said so. But no one knew about the part of her that just wanted to stand in the corner and scream and make it all go away. No one knew how many doubts she had that she couldn't do it and that her parents were right and that she was going to mess it all up.

"Not long," Dorcas answered finally, pasting on a smile she hoped was somewhat normal. "The yellow looks good. I'm going to go for a walk, okay?"

Edgar was still smiling slightly, but furrowed his eyebrows. "Are you okay?"

"Yeah, fine," she said, beginning to ease her way out of the room. She just needed some time away from Ed. Away from everything. She just needed to think. "I'm fucking awesome. I'm pregnant. Yay! I just... need some fresh air. The paint fumes are a little strong. I won't be long."

The smile fell completely away from Edgar's face, and he wanted to go after her and calm her down (because he wasn't stupid, he could tell she was freaking out), but another part of him was telling him to just let her be, and have her own space. It wasn't like he had anything to worry about, and it was perfectly understandable if she was a little upset. "Okay. Take your time."

"Cool," Dorcas said, and even though she thought that being alone at the moment maybe wasn't the best thing for her after all, she grabbed her jacket and headed upstairs, stepping into her shoes and leaving without even a shouted goodbye to Anna.

She wandered aimlessly for a while, and then just sat down at a bus stop, smirking at the bus that pulled up shortly after and stopped just to let her on. The dirty look the driver gave her as he pulled away made her feel a little better, and she shifted to lay down on the bench, one leg dangling off and both hands on her stomach. It was too much. She wanted to just feel like she had a year ago: responsibility free and with no one to think about but herself.

"Dorcas?" a familiar voice asked. It was Katie Shacklebolt. She was on her way home from running errands for her mother, and as she walked by the bus stop, she hardly recognized Dorcas. She didn't really want to talk to her, or even acknowledge that she was lying there looking like someone had shot her dog, but she couldn't help it. Despite the absolute cunt she knew Dorcas to be, she had to stop. She had to lay the grocery bags at her feet and peer at Dorcas with a quizzical look. "What the fuck did you do to your hair?"

"Don't be a dyke," Dorcas snapped in reply, relishing the feeling of being mean. She'd been so _good_ lately, to Ed and Ed's family and all their _good, nice_ friends. It was nice to interact with someone she could be a total bitch to. "I cut it, obviously. And I can't very well dye it seeing as how I've got a bun in the oven and the dye is supposedly a bit tough on a wee fucking foetus."

"Well I can see that," Katie said, crossing her arms. "And it's hard to ignore the flurry of rumours at school. What are you playing at, man? Why haven't you gotten rid of it yet?"

"I'm not getting rid of it, that's why," Dorcas replied. "Not that it's any of your fucking business, but Ed and I are keeping it. We're going to be a nice little family. What am I fucking playing at indeed."

Katie snorted. "Right. The whole shebang then? A wedding and curlers and a fucking apron, right? With baby on your hip at fucking seventeen?"

"Shut the fuck up," Dorcas growled, not liking having her own doubts spat at her in that tone, like it was more laughable for Dorcas to think she _could_ do it than to wonder if maybe she couldn't. "I can do it. You're just bitter that I dumped you for a boy."

"Yeah, and look at all the fucking good it did you, Dorcas Meadows. You've been kicked out of your house and you're pregnant," Katie said. "Yeah, looks to me that Edgar Bones did you a _world_ of fucking good, didn't he?"

Dorcas hoisted herself up and got to her feet, shoving Katie away roughly. "Shut your fucking dirty mouth, you whore. You don't know a fucking _thing_ about Edgar Bones _or_ my parents. You don't know anything."

"Right, sure I don't. Then why are you sitting by yourself at the fucking bus stop looking like you're ready to throw yourself in front of one, huh?" Katie asked. "You're too selfish to be anyone's mother, daughter, or anything else, including Bones' girlfriend, or fiancé, or _wife_ or whatever other stupid label he's cooked up for you on that pedestal he's put you on. And don't tell me he hasn't either. You could be _deaf_ and _still_ hear the shit people say about you two."

The words echoed in Dorcas' head and made her want to scream. She was doing really well. She wasn't that selfish anymore. She'd grown up. She thought of Ed and of the baby, and she'd quit smoking and drinking and even _dyeing her hair_ , and if that wasn't selfless, she didn't know what was. It didn't matter what Katie said. Katie didn't know her anymore. For once in her life, Dorcas was _glad_ that she'd changed.

"You don't know anything about me anymore," Dorcas said shakily, wishing Katie would just go away. "I love Ed. He loves me too and he knows me, actually knows me and not just thinks he knows me because he's heard the fucking hearsay like you, and we're good together, and we're going to be a family. I can fucking do it."

"You _love_ him? Oh that is _such_ fucking shit, Dorcas. The only person you love is yourself," Katie snapped back. "I don't care how long it's been since we were together. A year isn't that long, and you haven't changed so much as you seem to think you have." She came really close, looking Dorcas in the eyes and smirking. "You're still the scared little bitch-cunt that you were when _I_ used to fuck you."

Dorcas couldn't think of anything to say that didn't sound grade school and stupid and her brain wasn't working properly. She was supposed to be the one with the mean mouth. Katie had always been the nice one of the two of them, and what Dorcas wouldn't give for Katie to just start being nice like she used to be, to make Dorcas feel like she was worth all the shit she put everyone through. Ed made her feel that way, worth it and loved, but there was a kid involved now and it was too much and too complicated, and she wanted something simple.

"I need something easy," Dorcas said suddenly, not quite knowing what possessed her. She certainly couldn't expect _Katie_ to want to help her out at all. "Everything's so messed up, Katie. I'm having a baby. I don't care if you hate me and I don't care if you're a fucking twat. Just... give me something simple and easy right now or I'll tell everyone at school you're a huge fucking bull dyke. Can we just... go to your house and sit and watch something mindless? And you can smoke a cig for me, because I'm dying for one? 

Dorcas thought it was stupid to ask, and knew she was breaking one of her own long-standing rules. Never appear vulnerable in front of anyone unless you know they like you enough to die for you. That was her rule. And Katie was obviously not in that category, and she was going to do something terrible and then Dorcas would hit her, and maybe that'd be worth it anyway. All she could do was watch Katie and wait for her to reply.

Katie, on her part, was completely taken aback by Dorcas' request. She'd intended on annoying the shit out of Dorcas, of making her cry the tears Katie herself had cried for Dorcas when she'd fucked around on her with some stupid _asshole_. At the same time there was a part of her that just wanted to hug Dorcas, and _kiss_ Dorcas again, and make her feel better because shit she'd gotten herself into something interesting, to say the least. "I. Well. Okay, I guess."Please?"

"Oh thank _fuck_ ," Dorcas said, and smiled in a way like she was pretending everything was just happy and okay even though they'd been at each others' throats not a minute ago. "It was either that or a fist fight."

"I can't imagine that that'd be good for the baby," Katie said drolly, reaching to the ground for her mother's abandoned groceries. "Seriously though, Dorcas, what the fuck happened to you? You're not... well. You're not the same, you know? Least not full of... uh. Spirit and lesbian politics and shit."

"Nothing _happened_ to me. I just... have different issues on my plate. I can't really afford to be carefree and careless anymore," Dorcas said and shrugged. "And fuck, man, I never thought I'd ever hear myself say it, but it's a lot easier to just... not do the whole lesbian politics shit. And I'm dating a boy anyway, so. I'm such a fucking hypocrite. How are you doing with it? Come out to anyone yet, you spineless baby?"

Katie shook her head. "No. I'm not ready for that yet, but I will eventually. And really, man, how did you end up falling for a _boy_? You were the last person I expected heterosexuality from, Dor."

"Shove off," Dorcas said, but she was snickering a little. "I didn't fall for his penis. I just... fell for him. Ed's amazing. And he's loved me right from the start, even when I said I was a fucking dyke. But... it all just feels so surreal, this epic fucking love and a kid and all. It's just a bit much. I need a break."

"No fucking kidding," Katie said as they started walking toward her house. "Weren't you on fucking birth control or something?"

"Yeah. Kind of," Dorcas admitted as they walked, smoothing a hand over her round stomach. "I missed a few pills, but I didn't think it was a big deal. Mostly I didn't think it could happen to me."

"Probably because you didn't have to worry about it before Bones," Katie said. "Birds don't shoot sperm out of their fingers, thankfully."

"Ew, Katie," Dorcas laughed, and then wiggled her fingers teasingly at the other girl.

***

Dorcas and Katie burst out laughing. They were watching School of Rock, and to Katie it felt just like old times, lying there with Dorcas and laughing at something stupid while her head was in Katie's lap, and Katie could run her fingers through Dorcas' hair. It felt so comfortable and happy and almost as though _nothing_ had changed. Katie could even forget that Dorcas was pregnant, and that her boyfriend was sitting at home waiting for her (probably freaking right the fuck out, because it was getting late).

"I seriously want to meet Jack Black," Dorcas mused into Katie's leg. "He's fucking hilarious. If Tenacious D ever come to town, we should go."

"Fuck yes," Katie agreed happily, rubbing the base on Dorcas' neck.

"I didn't realize I missed you," Dorcas said suddenly. "I mean, I never think about you. But now that I'm here, it's nice."

"Well," Katie said tentatively. "I missed you, then. I never really got over you."

"That's because I'm fucking amazing," Dorcas said with an easy smile. It was a simple part to play, the carefree, careless girl with no responsibilities and no one to think about but herself. She felt a bit guilty about it, but she just needed a short break from reality. She loved Ed, she really did. More than anything. But the whole situation was daunting.

"Yeah, you really are," Katie breathed softly.

Dorcas sat up and looked over at Katie with wide, teasing eyes. "Screw getting over me. You still fucking love me, don't you? That's why you were such a bitch earlier."

"So what?" Katie said. "You're not exactly the easiest person to get over, Dorcas."

"And why is that again?" Dorcas asked loftily, not really taking any of it very seriously. "Because I'm..."

"Oh fuck you," Katie said. "You know perfectly well what you are and it's why you're such an egotistical cuntrag."

"You've gotten better at insults since I've been gone," Dorcas said mildly, wearing a self-satisfied smirk. "You've missed me so much you've been trying to imitate my dirty mouth. That's touching. But I have a boyfriend now. Sorry."

"Fuck, your head is bigger than your stomach, you shithead," Katie said, irritated.

Dorcas laughed a little. "Okay, so that one was weak. Can I ask you a question though, Katie? A serious question?"

"Yeah," Katie said. "So long as it's not fucking lame."

"How much, exactly--and I need you to be specific here! How much do you want me? How badly are you just _gagging_ for me?"

Katie gave Dorcas an angry shove. "God, what the _fuck_ Dorcas? You're so sadistic! Why do you enjoy torturing people so much?"

Dorcas just toppled over, laughing, and shifted until she was laying on her back on the couch, wiggling her feet in Katie's lap. Ignoring Katie's question, Dorcas, though she hadn't thought about it enough to consider what she might be trying to achieve, continued to bait her ex-girlfriend. "Are you wet right now thinking about me? Even though I'm pregnant, you still think I'm fucking sexy, don't you? Does it kill you that you can't have me?"

Katie screwed up her face so she wouldn't start crying and give Dorcas more fuel. "Bitch."

"Oh, hey, you know, I'm wearing underwear that you bought me," Dorcas said, laughter stilling as she watched Katie closely. It wasn't that she actively wanted to hurt her. She was scared and panicked and she wanted to feel like before, when she did enjoy stuff like this. Being mean and shocking and selfish. "Ed loves them. He pulled them off with his teeth once. God, that was a good fuck. Bet you've missed fucking me, haven't you? I was always so good at that."

That was it. Katie cracked. She rushed forward, climbing on top of Dorcas and crashing her lips into Dorcas', wanting her to just Shut the Fuck Up already.

Dorcas went along with it for a second or two, or three or four, before she pushed Katie away and gave her an incredulous sort of look. "Uh. Boyfriend and baby, remember? I'm fucking in love. Why would I fuck around on him?"

Katie bit her bottom lip and said, "Sex isn't love."

"To him it is," Dorcas insisted. "I'm not doing this to him, not over _you_. You're not worth it, Katie. You're beautiful, but you don't mean enough to me for me to fuck up the rest of my life."

"To him, but you're not him," Katie said, a little hurt, but not hurt enough to give up trying. It had been so long and _Christ_ Katie had missed Dorcas. "I mean, shit, seriously Dorcas, when did you start letting other people control your actions? I thought you needed a break from fucking Bones, and your baby, and all that crap? Let it be... I mean, fuck. Let it be mindless, yeah?"

"I don't love you. I don't even think about you. At all. I love him. I'm _in_ love with him," Dorcas said, but the words came out breathy and her hands were inching towards Katie's sides. This was stupid. She didn't even want this and she knew it, but she _missed_ being selfish and she just wanted to not think. She wanted it to be mindless. She'd come to Katie's for mindless.

"You don't have to love me," Katie whispered back, crawling back toward Dorcas. "I'm not asking for anything except right now."

It would _kill_ Edgar, Dorcas knew it would, but she wanted to not think about him, about their baby, about their whole life. Dorcas hadn't even _wanted_ kids. Closing her mind off from all of it, Dorcas grabbed Katie by the shirt and pulled.

"You can't tell anyone. Promise," Dorcas whispered savagely before pressing her lips hard against Katie's. It could be mindless. It couldn't be any other way.

***

"No, I'm sorry Mrs. Bones, I've been keeping my eye out for her and I called a bunch of our friends, but no one has seen her," Adam said into the receiver, exasperated and tired. It was easy the 7th time Edgar's mother had called, and Adam was worried, and everyone was worried, and _where the fuck was she_?

"Thank you, dear," Anna said, sadly, her tears obvious through her words. "I'm _sorry_ to have called again... it's so late, or well early, and it's easier to call the same numbers over again than to sit here and worry myself stupid."

"I know, Mrs. Bones, and I'll call you if I hear anything, I promise," Adam told her. "Really, I will."

"I know, thank you, dear," Anna said. "Bye, now." Hanging up the phone, Anna shook her head, dabbing at her eyes with the tissue in her hands. Joseph's arm was wrapped around her shoulders. Edgar was still out searching for Dorcas, with Jon's help, and Sherry was sleeping on the couch with Susan in her arms.

Dorcas trudged up the driveway, really not wanting to go back and really feeling like crap and really, really hating herself, but she knew she couldn't avoid it forever. Maybe until morning when everyone woke up. For now, all she wanted was to crawl into bed with Ed and pretend the last few hours had never happened.

As soon as she let herself into the house, however, she froze. Something felt weird. The lights were all on and Sherry was sleeping on the couch.

"Um, hello?" she called softly. "What's going on? Did something happen?"

"Dorcas?" Anna said, rushing into the room at the sound of her voice, and bursting tears again at the sight of her. Joseph was quick at her heels as Anna grabbed Dorcas and pulled her into a tight, thankful hug. "Thank _God_ , we've been so worried! What happened? Where were you? Joseph, call Jon's handy and let the boys know she's home."

Joe grunted and pressed a quick kiss to the back of Dorcas' head before he headed back to the kitchen to follow orders.

Dorcas was just frozen in wonder. They'd been worried about _her_? It was almost one in the morning, sure, but that wasn't that late and she'd said she was going out. Feeling dazed and a little sick, Dorcas pulled away from Anna. The hug was nice, but Dorcas didn't deserve it, and it made her feel like she would throw up all over the floor with what she'd done.

"I'm fine. Nothing, nothing happened. I just... I told Ed I was going out for a bit," Dorcas managed, not able to meet Anna's eyes. "I'm just going to wait downstairs for him."

"Oh honey, you had us all thinking the _worst_ ," Anna said, hiccupping. "Next time, sweetie, please call us and let us know if you're going to be out late, okay?"

"Sorry," Dorcas said, and if the word felt inadequate for what she'd put Anna through, she had no idea what she was going to say to Ed. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to worry you. I need to... take a shower. I'll wait for Ed downstairs."

And with that, Dorcas fled desperately from the room, and all that was going through her mind was a constant loop of, _what have I done, what have I done, what have I done_?

Anna watched Dorcas go worriedly, wiping at her eyes. With a sigh she headed back into the kitchen, crossing onto the tile just as Joseph hung up the phone. 

"Something's not quite right, Joe," she told her husband. "Something's happened. Eddie said she was acting strangely when she left."

"I know. But she isn't ours and it's not our business," Joe said, pulling Anna into his arms. "She's here and safe and that's what matters."

"She's as good as ours," Anna said. "Someone has to take care of her. How else will she learn to take care of that baby?"

"I know. But honey, let Ed take care of his girl," Joe insisted. "I know you only want to help, but that's his job now, not yours."

"I know, I know," Anna agreed. "It always seems like she's crying out for help and direction... I'd love to give Joanne Meadows a piece of my mind."

"She looked so shocked that the worry was over her," Joseph said, his voice gruff with answering anger at the Meadows family. "Like she never had anyone wait up for her before. You'd think her parents least would've done that, how stuck they were on appearances..."

The back door opened then and Edgar and Jon rushed in. Edgar had obviously been crying, and Jon rested a comforting hand on his brother's shoulder as Edgar looked at his parents expectantly. "Where is she?"

"Downstairs. Went to take a shower," Joe said, moving towards his sons. He patted Ed on the shoulder and said, "Come on, Jon. Let's go get Susan and wait with Sherry."

Once Jon and Joseph had left the room, Anna pulled Edgar into a tight hug. "It's all right, Eddie, baby," she said. "She's home, at least. I don't know where she was, or what she was doing, but she seemed out of sorts."

Hugging his mother back, Edgar took a deep breath and said, "She's been acting really weird for the last few days, Ma. She won't talk to me about it, but I know something's wrong."

"Well, all you can do is try again, Eddie. Go on then," she said. She patted him on the back and pushed him in the direction of the basement stairs. "And we'll have to get her a handy, dear."

"Yeah," Edgar replied, distractedly. "Thanks Ma," he added, and then made his way down the stairs.

The shower was still running but the door was open. As he came closer, he saw that the shower curtain was open as well, and Dorcas was just sitting in the tub naked, letting the water fall on her.

"Dorcas?"

"Yeah," Dorcas replied dully, not looking up. "I'm fine. I'm sorry you worried."

"Where were you?" Edgar asked, coming into the bathroom and sitting on the toilet. The room was steaming. "How hot is that water?"

"I was just out," Dorcas answered, and winced at the words. She owed him so much more, but she didn't know what to say. She'd told Katie not to tell anyone, and she'd planned on keeping it secret, but she knew she couldn't. Not from Ed. She hadn't looked at him yet. She couldn't bear to. "And it's fine. Not that hot."

Edgar reached his hand forward and pulled back almost immediately. "Christ, Dorcas! That's scalding!" He reached over and turned the taps off, frowning slightly. "What's wrong with you?"

"I just got freaked," Dorcas said softly, rubbing a hand over one arm wondrously. The skin was red and felt a little tender. The water had been pretty hot she guessed. Closing her eyes, she leaned her head sideways and dropped it onto Ed's thigh, wet hair and all. She took a deep, shuddering breath and wrapped her arms around Ed's leg, so she was half in the tub and half out as she choked out, "I'm so sorry."

"Why?" Edgar asked, confused. "Dorcas, I don't... I want to help you, but I don't know what's wrong. You have to talk to me."

"I got freaked," Dorcas said, voice hoarse as she tried to stay calm enough to explain. Maybe if she could explain it to him, he wouldn't hate her for it. "Everything's going so fast and I'm only seventeen and Bonesie, I just... I love you so much," Dorcas said, and by now she'd started crying and she finally turned to look up at him as she shook with suppressed sobs. "I do love you, you have to know that. I love you so much it makes me fucking dizzy, but I never expected to have to grow up this fast, and _fuck_ I'm so scared. I'm so fucking scared. I can't have a kid and get married and have my whole life planed out before me at seventeen, I just don't know how to deal with that. That's not how I work."

Ed looked like he wanted to say something, and Dorcas had been talking for a long time, but she had to finish, she had to or she never would, so she raised her voice and looked up at him and begged with her eyes. She felt like a drug addict, begging for her fix, but she needed Ed, she couldn't do this without him. She needed him to love her and take care of her and hold her hand through it all. She _needed_ that. It was more than just love or want. "Ed, I tried. I tried for you because we were going to have a family, a little family, and I want it too, but I couldn't be as sure as you, even though I love you so, so, so much. I just, I got scared and I messed up. It was a mistake and I'll never do it again. I didn't even want to do it this time. You have to believe me. You believe me, right? Please believe me, you have to."

"What. What did you do?" Edgar asked quietly, licking his lips, the colour draining from his face.

"I didn't do it on purpose," Dorcas said brokenly through the tears. It was hard to talk for all the emotion and her nose was running and she was still clinging to him like he was her safety raft in a storm and she wasn't going to let him go for anything. "I didn't mean to. I just, I went out for a walk like I said, and I ran into Katie and we went back to her house just to relax, that's all, I swear it. I fucking swear it. If I'd known, I wouldn't have gone, but I didn't so I did. I was just, I was in a mood, you know those moods I get, and I was being such a bitch to her, and then she kissed me. I told her no, but I wasn't, Ed, I wasn't thinking. It was just stupidity, okay? It didn't mean anything. Sex isn't love. I love _you_ , Bonesie, only you. You believe me, right?"

Edgar's heart cracked in two. He started breathing fast through flared nostrils and the tears welled up in his eyes, and had he been standing his knees would've given way. He closed his eyes and swallowed hard, grasping for something, _anything_ to say. How could she, after everything he'd done, after everything that had happened... how could she say that to him? How could she tell him that panic over _him_ had sent her to _someone else_? He opened his eyes and looked at her, but _Christ_ it hurt to look at her when she was crying and begging and pleading and holding onto him like he was everything she had.

"You selfish cunt," he choked.

"Eddie," she whispered, closing her eyes against his words and pressing her face into his leg to muffle the sobs. She'd been called lots of things in her life. She'd even been called that more than a few times. But hearing it now, like that, from Edgar, _her Edgar_ , was one of the most horrible things she'd ever heard.

"I'm sorry. I didn't mean it. I'll never do it again," she gasped into his leg, her breath choppy and jagged from crying, coming involuntarily mid-sentence and mid-word. "I love you, only you. I _need_ you. I don't have anyone else."

Edgar looked at her with incredulity, standing quickly and pushing her off of him and back into the tub. "No. Don't say that to me. Stop it. You've been doing this to me for too long, Dorcas, you know, and I run after you like some fucking puppy and do absolutely _fucking everything_ for you and what... I mean. You can't. This isn't. You can't expect me to just say 'Oh, you cheated on me, but you still love me? No worries!' and then we'll run off into the ruddy sunset together, okay? You _don't_ love me, obviously, or you would've _never_ done this. Never. I'm not some fucking puppet that'll do things to suit what _you_ want because whether you noticed it or not there were two of us in this God damn relationship!"

"I know, I know, I'm sorry," Dorcas said frantically, scrambling to her feet and almost falling in her attempts to get out of the tub. "I do love you. I do. It was just stupid. It didn't mean anything. It doesn't mean anything. Please, Ed, can it just not mean anything? I can't do this without you. I don't _want_ to do this without you. _Please_ , just let me try to fix it?"

"No!" Edgar snapped, backing into the bedroom. "No. I don't give a flying fuck _what_ you want. I can't... Jesus fuck, I can't even look at you, Dorcas. I'm done with this. I don't have anything else to say to you."

Dorcas couldn't think. She couldn't think about anything. All she knew was that she couldn't let him leave. She could fix this if he would just stay. All he had to do was stay and they could fix it, she knew they could, but how could they fix anything if he left?

Following him into the bedroom, Dorcas tried to inject some fake rationality into her voice, even though she hadn't even freaked out this much when her parents kicked her out. "Can we talk about this? Please? That's what couples do, right, they talk and work things out. Just don't go right now. We can just talk, can't we?"

"What's there to talk about?" Edgar asked, grabbing a knapsack out of the closet and going to the dresser. "I had this crazy idea that being in a relationship with someone for a year and having a baby with them and saying you _love them_ meant that you _didn't have sex with other people_. Clearly we weren't on the same page."

"Ed, stop. What are you doing? Don't, don't," Dorcas said, red eyes-widening. He was packing. He wasn't just leaving now, for a night or a few hours. He was _packing things_. "You can't leave me, Ed, you can't. Please. I really am sorry. Look, I'll, I don't know. I'll do anything you want. Or you can do something to get me back. You can have sex with someone else, if you want. Just don't leave me."

"That's your solution?" Edgar questioned with an angry laugh, zipping up the knapsack and heading into the bathroom again to grab his toothbrush. "After the shit you kicked up when you found out I slept with Marlene _three years ago_ , you're telling me that fucking some other bird will make this right? Will fix you having _cheated on me_?"

"I don't have a solution," Dorcas said. "There is no solution. I don't know how to fix this. I just know we have to."

As he walked back out of the bathroom and brushed past her, she reached out and grabbed his toothbrush, wrenching it from his hands and holding it against her chest.

"You can't have this. You can't _leave_. Eddie _please_."

"Keep it, then," Edgar said, and started walking up the stairs.

Screwing up her face, Dorcas burst into a fresh round of tears, sobbing against the door frame. This wasn't happening. She had to stop it. Her breakdown was only a few seconds, but it was enough for Ed to get up the stairs unimpaired. She ran up after him, heedless of her complete state of undress and how chilled she was, and spotted him as he was heading out the front door.

She chased after him as he climbed in his car, running down the driveway and managing to position herself in front of his car before he could pull away.

"Don't go. Ed, please, I love you," she sobbed, palms flat against the hood of his car as she stared right into his eyes, desperation clear on her face and in her words. "You can't. I need you. I can't do this without you."

"Well that's just too fucking bad, isn't it!" Edgar shouted at her. "Because here I've been, _doing this with you_ , and if this is the thanks I get for trying so fucking hard to please you, Dorcas, then clearly I've had my head up my arse since the day I met you! I am _done_ with this, do you hear me? I am sick of you walking all over me and expecting me to love you anyhow and keep letting you do it!"

"I'm pregnant with your baby!" she screamed, banging her fists on the hood of his car. "Doesn't that mean anything to you? I need you! I can't do this by myself!"

On the last word, her voice broke and the anger receded and it dropped from a scream down to a plead, but there were already lights coming on in the neighbour houses. Dorcas didn't even care. She just leaned forward to rest her face against his car and cried.

"Don't leave me. You know I don't like to be alone, and I don't have anyone else," she moaned. "I'm sorry."

"It meant _everything_ to me Dorcas!" Edgar said, starting the engine and honking the horn at her.

At the sound of the horn, Dorcas jumped, but refused to move, staying right where she was, plastered to the front of his car. He wouldn't run her over. If she didn't move, he couldn't leave.

Anna, Joseph, Jon and Sherry had been stood in the doorway, watching the exchange. Susan was crying in Sherry's arms, and she tried to soothe her as Jon hopped forward, wrapping his arms awkwardly around Dorcas' naked frame and trying to pull her away from Edgar's car. "Honey, move away, c'mon. Let him go, now."

"No," Dorcas grunted, struggling in Jon's arms and still sobbing as Ed began to ease out onto the road. Raising her voice again, she screamed at the car, "No! Ed, don't go. Don't _go_!"

Jon sighed, struggling to pull her toward the house. "Dorcas. Dorcas he's going and you have to come back inside now."

Dorcas watched his tail lights fade forlornly. She thought it was probably the first time Edgar Bones had ever not done exactly as she asked, and she had this terrible feeling that she wouldn't ever see him ever again. Her chest began to hurt, physically hurt, and she turned suddenly, pressing her face into Jon's chest and shuddering against him.

"I can feel my heart breaking," she croaked. "I think I might be dying."

"No, you're not," Jon answered, sadly. "You're still alive, Dorcas. Now come in the house."

***

Remus had been woken by an insistent buzzing sound, and finally shook the sleep fuzz enough to realize it was someone wanting into their building. He peeled himself out of bed, whispering for Sirius to just stay put as it was probably just drunk kids before he even realized that Sirius had not _come_ to bed yet. He had just gotten home and was still in the shower, as Remus could hear the water running. Getting up and trying to shake some sense into his brain, Remus stumbled to the living room to press the button on the speaker.

"Yes, who's there?" he asked, his voice sounding semi-normal and not too sleep-roughened.

"It's Edgar," he answered, obviously crying. "Can I come up please?"

"Of course," Remus said, and almost asked what was wrong before simply buzzing him in and deciding to save the question for later. Remus walked to the bathroom to poke his head in, saying quickly, "Sirius, Edgar's coming up. Don't come out naked. And I don't know what it's about, yet, but he sounds upset. I'm going to make tea."

And make tea he did. The kettle was on and the teapot ready to be filled by the time the knock came at the door, and Remus was there opening it practically before Edgar's knuckles even hit the wood.

"Come in," Remus said quietly. "What's happened? Is everyone all right?"

Edgar's eyes looked red and his expression was completely defeated. He dropped his knapsack on the ground, and didn't look at Remus as he said, "Dorcas cheated on me."

"Oh, my," Remus said, and wondered what to do. He reached out tentatively, touching Edgar's arm. "Are you... I mean, is there anything I can do? Tea? Hard liquor? You can sleep on the pull out, of course."

Edgar ran his hand through his hair and sniffed. "Tea would be nice."

Sirius came out of the bathroom, having pulled back on his dirty t-shirt with a towel wrapped around his waist. "Ed, mate," he said as Edgar sat himself on a barstool at the island, looking completely miserable. "What on earth happened?"

"Dorcas," Remus said softly. "She, ah. Cheated. Tea it is. Cream or sugar?"

"Just cream, please," Edgar said as Sirius sat beside him and put an arm around his shoulder. "I'm sorry, Eddie. You know you're welcome here as long as you want to stay. I mean... what are you going to do?"

Edgar shrugged. "I don't know. I don't know if I can give her up, but I don't think I can ever trust her again."

Remus just shook his head silently and got Edgar's tea ready. He thought Ed and Dorcas had been so happy together. "She mustn't know how good she has it. Or, ah. Had it."

"She said she didn't want to do it, that's the funny thing," Edgar said. "And she was begging and pleading me not to leave, and to forgive her, and telling me she loved me over and over and over again like she..." Edgar screwed up his face. "Like she thought if she kept saying it it'd change what she did."

"I guess that means she still loves you then, whatever possessed her," Sirius said, thoughtfully.

"Pressure, I guess," Edgar said. "She was saying how she couldn't be a wife and a mother at seventeen, but then she was saying she couldn't do it without me. I... before I left she was trying to block the car and she said, 'I'm having your baby, doesn't that mean anything to you?' and it was just this incredulous thing to me, because _Christ_ , isn't it obvious how important it is to me?"

"She's so young," Remus remarked softly. "I mean. It's terrible what she did and it's no excuse. But everything you just said... she just sounds like a scared child. She doesn't know what to do without you. She's hardly been without you at all since you got together last year, has she? Not that you don't have every right to be angry with her. In fact, I think you're doing the right thing. If you'd stayed, what would she have learned, except that even her most reprehensible actions have no consequences? I... sorry. I'm, ah. Not good at comforting. I tend to analyze."

"You're right though," Edgar said. "She's been acting so strange lately, and I mean... I dunno. I guess I assumed it had something to do with the baby, or with the run in we had with her parents at Narcissa's wedding, and then tonight she went out for a walk at like, five, and then didn't come home until one... And she just expects me to forgive and forget and let her have her way again. I treat her like a spoiled little princess, don't I?"

"She has a way of doing that with everyone though, Ed," Sirius said quietly.

"It doesn't make it right, though," Remus put in. "If she's going to have a grown up life, she ought to learn to be a grown up."

"Maybe I was more in love with the idea of her and of having her than I was actually in love with Dorcas," Edgar mused sadly. "I just... I never thought she'd want to hurt me. Stupid I guess."

"It's not stupid, Eddie," Sirius said. "I doubt she planned to hurt you, and I mean, I'm not trying to justify what she did or anything, but maybe this is the... you know. Break and wake-up call you both needed. There's not really a happily ever after, you know?"

"Don't write her off," Remus said, his vehement tone shocking even him. "Don't... don't do anything you don't feel is right and don't let her guilt you with need. But don't write her off, either. She does love you. Anyone can see it. Everyone makes mistakes."

"I just think I need to take a break from her for a while," Edgar said. "I've seen her almost every day for a year now, I just... it suddenly feels very suffocating, and painful and _smothering_. And I think maybe she needs to learn to take care of herself."

"I think that's a good choice," Remus agreed. "And like Sirius said. Our pull out is yours as long as you need it."

***

Dorcas stared at the door for nearly a quarter of an hour before she could bring herself to knock. The idea of going back into that house made a little bile rise in the back of her throat, but she had no other options. She couldn't stay with Adam because his parents wouldn't let her, and she didn't want to stay with any of her other friends. She certainly couldn't stay with the Boneses, not after what she'd done.

So, she knocked briskly, stuffing her hands into her trouser pockets and slunching, wearing sunglasses and a bucket hat as though she hoped her mother wouldn't recognize her and she could just be some random guest and not actually Dorcas Meadows. She wasn't sure she could take her mother right now.

Not that she had a choice.

Joanne opened the door distractedly, and nearly jumped a foot when she saw who was standing there. "Dorcas? What're you doing here?"

"You were right. I'm a fuck up. I cheated on him with a girl and he left me," Dorcas said dully. "Get your 'I told you so's out of the way, and then tell me if I can come in or not."

Joanne pursed her lips and stepped back, holding the door open so Dorcas could come inside. "Come sit with me, Dorcas," she said. "I was having tea. We can talk."

"Sure. Lovely. Sounds great," Dorcas said sarcastically, but walked into the house anyway. "Just so you know, if I had any other options, I'd take them over this any day. But I don't. Which, as I'm sure you'll just love pointing out eight thousand times a day, is all my own fault too."

"I'm done pointing out anything to you, Dorcas," Joanne said honestly, heading to the kitchen. "I just want to talk to you. I want to know who you are."

"You're the woman who popped me out, that's all, and you had your chance and you missed it," Dorcas said coldly. Sneering, she added, "Sorry I'm not more forgiving, but I've had a rough couple of days."

"I'm not asking for forgiveness, I'm asking to talk to you like a grown-up, Dorcas," Joanne said, grabbing a second cup out of the cupboard and setting it on the table as she seated herself. "If you are grown-up enough to be in the situation you're in, then you should be grown-up enough to put our personal differences aside and _talk_ to me. You have to talk to someone, dear."

Dorcas supposed she had a point, though she wasn't about to admit that. Sitting down at the table, Dorcas slouched forward to lean on her elbows. "Yeah, well. I'm obviously not a grown-up. I fucked it all up just like you said I would."

Joanne took the teapot in her hands and poured them both a cup quietly, debating what to say. She wanted to be on Dorcas' side, and at the same time, she wanted to be able to give her sound advice for once; and advice as in a suggestion rather than forcefully pushing her to do something she didn't want to do. "Well. What do you plan to do now?"

"I don't know. Wait and see if he comes back, I guess," Dorcas said softly. "Maybe buy some new clothes in the meantime, because I'm too fucking disgusted with myself to go back to the Boneses house to get mine. Pretty much live in denial and avoid the whole problem until I just fucking can't anymore. Yeah, that's pretty much my plan."

"And if he doesn't come back?" Joanne pressed carefully, dropping a sugar into each of their cups.

Dorcas reached out and grabbed an extra two sugars, dropping them into her cup with a splash. "Keep waiting. I can't imagine a life without him. I need him."

"Then why did you do this to him?" Joanne asked. "If you love him and you need him, why hurt him?"

"Because I'm a fucking idiot, Mother, that's why," Dorcas snapped, tears coming to her eyes again. She'd cried all night. Even once she'd fallen asleep fitfully around five that morning, she'd woken to a wet pillow. She thought she was all cried out, but apparently not. "I made a mistake, and he has to forgive me because I can't live without him, that's all there is to it."

"Do you really think he'll forgive you for taking advantage of him and hurting him?" Joanne questioned sadly, taking a sip of her tea. "Forget what you want and what you need and think about him, Dorcas. Put yourself in his shoes."

"No," Dorcas said, pushing away her tea and getting up. She didn't want to think about that, because Edgar had every right to hate her, she knew that, but she didn't want him to hate her. "No, because then I'd have to hate me even more and I already fucking hate myself enough. Just leave me alone."

With that, Dorcas headed up the stairs to her old room, flopping onto the bed and not even noticing that they'd cleaned it. Dorcas curled into a little ball and hugged a pillow to herself tightly and wished she could just rewind everything twenty four hours.

She hated this house. She hated this room. She hated her mother and her father and her stupid sister and everything about this life she thought she'd left behind. She hated being stuck in it again.

She also knew she deserved it.

***

Joanne licked her lips, leaning on the doorframe to the bedroom. She'd been thinking of this for days now, and Edgar hadn't called, and truthfully she had nothing else to ask of Dorcas. She wasn't taking care of herself, she had no support, and clearly she wasn't prepared to raise a child by herself. Dorcas seemed to ignore her presence, lying in bed with her hands on her stomach and watching the telly at a much stronger volume than was necessary. Joanne walked over and turned it off before sitting on the edge of Dorcas' bed. Dorcas didn't even flinch.

"Dorcas, honey?" Joanne said softly, frowning. "Sweetie, I think we should talk."

"I don't want to talk," Dorcas replied hollowly. It had been four days since Ed had left. She thought he would've called by now, at least to see if she was okay. She knew Anna had called, though Dorcas had declined to speak to her. The only person she wanted was Ed.

"Then I'll talk and you'll listen," Joanne said. "I think it's time to make a decision for yourself, Dorcas. It's a decision only you can make, sweetie, and _please_ understand that I'm _not_ trying to push you to do something you don't want to do. You still have... you still have time to be seventeen again, Dorcas. If you have this baby there's no going back. You'll be a grown-up whether you want to be or not. And... if you think you're ready to do this, to be a mother, then do it. Your father and I will support you, whether Edgar comes back or not. But if you're not, Dorcas, there's no shame in wanting your life back."

Dorcas did want her life back, but she wanted her life with _Ed_ back. She'd been so scared, but now all she wanted was the assurance of him, of what they had planned, of his family. She wanted to be with him and have his baby and get married and live together and be happy, and that's what she wanted. She hated this. She hated living without him. She hated this _baby_ if all it meant was that she'd have to do it without him.

"Whatever. Make an appointment at the clinic," Dorcas said, and reached for the remote to turn the television back on. She didn't want to think about it. Thinking about it made her heart break all over again. "For tomorrow, if you can. As soon as possible."

Joanne frowned. "It's not a decision to take lightly, Dorcas. I know this baby means a lot to you, and that Edgar does too. You don't have to do anything you don't want to do."

"I know that. Can you get out? I'm watching this," Dorcas said, staring with glassy eyes at the television. She didn't even know what 'this' was. She just wanted to be alone.

"Okay," Joanne said, getting to her feet. "I'll make you an appointment then. I'll be downstairs if you need me, sweetie."

"Shut the door!" Dorcas shouted, and as soon as her mother did, Dorcas sat up and began gasping for air. She was seeing stars and sort of felt like she was going to pass out, but instead she just rolled over and buried her face in the pillows so her mother wouldn't hear the retching sobs that felt like they were tearing Dorcas in half.

She just kept telling herself that she deserved it.

***

"Miss Meadows, you have to calm down," the pacifying nurse said, holding the girl around the shoulders where she sat in a hospital gown on the metal table.

"No I don't, I'm fine," Dorcas gasped, her voice high and hysterical, knuckles white where they gripped the edge of the table. "I'm really fine. I just, I can't do this, but I'm fine. Don't call anyone. I'm just, I'll get dressed and go home. Oh fuck." Dorcas couldn't breathe. She couldn't breathe at all, and just those few sentences used up all her oxygen and she felt faint. Tears were falling from her eyes and she was shaking and she felt so out of control.

"May," the nurse holding Dorcas called to the other nurse in the doorway, "Call the first person on her contact list. I'm sorry, Miss Meadows, but we can't let you go without someone being here for you. Take a few deep breaths there now, sweetie, and I'll help you get your clothes back on."

"I'm fine," Dorcas managed, still shaking. "Don't call anyone."

May shut the door behind her and went to the front desk, looking up Dorcas' file. A lot of girls that came in were hurting, and they made them all sign the contracts that let the clinic keep them there until someone could come to collect them. It was for their own good.

As May dialled the number and waited for an answer from Edgar Bones, she wondered if that was the father, and if he'd even come. A lot of them wouldn't.

Edgar set the mop down against the wall and pulled his ringing phone out of the holder on his belt. "Hello?" he said croakily into the receiver, his voice sore from days spent crying more than he thought a man should, and talking to Remus and Sirius.

"Hello. Am I speaking to Edgar Bones?" May asked curtly. It was best not to get emotional, she'd found.

"Uh, yes. Who's this?" Edgar asked, pulling back the phone long enough to glance at the number on the screen. It wasn't familiar.

"My name is May Erickson, and I'm calling from the Salcombe Planned Parenthood Clinic," she said shortly. "We have a Dorcas Meadows here in need of immediate assistance. Can you come in?"

"I. Dorcas is at the...?" Edgar shook his head and registered the fact that she'd probably gotten rid of the baby. He couldn't cry anymore, but his voice was wobbly as he asked, "Did she? I mean, the baby..."

"I cannot discuss clients with you, Mr. Bones," May said, and then sighed. "But no. She didn't go through with it."

Edgar breathed a sigh of relief. "Thank God," he muttered, and the added, "I'll be there as soon as I can."

"Mr. Bones, by agreeing to come in, you are also agreeing to act in Miss Meadows' best interests," May added quickly before he could hang up. So often when the fathers did come in, they weren't happy about it. "She is extremely upset already. If you cannot agree to that, I will call the next contact on her list."

Edgar licked his lips, and paused before saying, "I'm not going to do anything, I. She's my. I'm always looking out for her best interests."

"Good," May said. "Now. Do you know where we're located?"

"Uh, just off of Churchill Drive, yeah?" Edgar asked.

"That is correct. The Laurel Building. See you shortly, Mr. Bones," May said, and hung up. Sooner rather than later, she hoped.

***

Edgar had left work right away once his boss had said it was okay, and to take his time. Roger was a good sort, mostly, and at least understood that some things were too important to ignore. When he pushed open the glass door to the clinic, a bell chimed above him, and everyone sitting in the lobby turned to look at him. It made Edgar feel awkward and uncomfortable as he walked from the door to the receptionist's desk in his work jumper (he hadn't bothered to change), and caused him to wonder a bit belatedly why Dorcas had put him first on her contact list for an appointment to get an abortion.

"Er, hello," he said to the nurse. "Um. I'd Edgar Bones. I'm here to pick up Dorcas Meadows?"

"Hello, Mr. Bones," May said, and gestured for him to follow her. She led him up the hall and to a doorway at the end. "She's in there. You may take your time. We won't need that room for just over an hour from now."

And with that, May turned and walked back towards the desk. Poor girl. She hoped the boy could help.

Edgar stood in front of the door, staring at it for a few minutes after the nurse had left, wondering why he'd agreed to come. He didn't want a fight, or a reinactment of what happened after she'd told him. He wasn't sure what he wanted. He wanted her, but he didn't want her. He wanted the baby, but he didn't want the baby. Nothing seemed to make sense in his head. He took a deep breath before reaching out and turning the doorknob determinedly. He'd come. She needed him in a completely different way than she'd needed him before.

Dorcas heard the door open, but didn't turn to look. She stayed right where she was, sitting on the end of the stupid, paper covered bed, staring at the wall, every muscle in her body taught. If it was a doctor or a nurse or someone, they'd say something, or approach. Since they didn't, that must mean it was Ed. So she just waited.

"So you kept it then," Edgar said finally, shutting the door behind him and leaning against it.

"Yeah, for now," Dorcas said, turning her head a little, but stopping before she could see him. If she saw him, who knows if she'd get as hysterical as before, and she had some things she needed to say before she got... emotional. "I've been doing a lot of thinking. Mostly just in the last hour, because up until today, I was doing my fuck all best not to think. But. It's not fair of me to get rid of it. It isn't just mine, even if we're not..." Okay, and that's the way to get her throat to close up. Clearing her throat, Dorcas changed the subject and continued. "I can't do this on my own. And I'm not... I'm not saying that to fucking, to guilt you. I just. I can't. So I'm telling you. If I'm doing it on my own, I'll get rid of it, either this way or by adoption, I don't know. Or you can have it. I just, I wanted to give you a choice. I've been really selfish until now, and it's about time I grow the fuck up and start thinking about you."

Edgar crossed his arms and looked at his feet. "I've been thinking too," he said quietly. "And I realized that I've just been manufacturing this idea of you, and of us, and of this kid, like, you know... Some sort of fairy tale, I guess. And I can't... I just can't do that anymore. I don't see you the same way I saw you last week or last month, or last year, and I'm not ever going to see you the same way."

"It doesn't matter," Dorcas said, getting to her feet and moving to stand facing Ed, looking at him finally and taking a deep breath. "I've decided to let you go, Ed."

"What?" Edgar said. "What does that. You're dumping me?"

"No," Dorcas said, the word accompanied by more tears. She looked up and dabbed at her swollen eyes. "Fucking tears. I'm so fucking sick of crying. No, I'm not dumping you. I'd sell my soul for another chance with you, Bonesie. I'm just... I love you so much and I can't... you're right, I can't keep doing to you what I've been doing. Last time, the way I acted? Begging and, and screaming, and... that's not fair. What I did was really fucking wrong, and you had every right to... to leave me. I know that. And I just love you so much, but I'm letting you go. I'm letting you know I'll survive on my own, if I have to. I..."

"Dorcas..." Edgar said, and he reached out for her, pulling her close and looking down at her, holding her arms in his hands. "Listen. I don't forgive you. I understand why, though, and I'm sorry I pushed you that far away from me. But I mean. You're not getting rid of me that easily."

The words had stuck in Dorcas' throat, and now with Ed saying that, and she was just so relieved, even if it wasn't okay yet, and she couldn't help but close the final distance between them, wrapping her arms around him tightly and pressing her face so hard into his chest as she cried that she could feel his heartbeat against her cheek. She couldn't even say anything, she just stood and clung and cried.

"I love you, Dorcas," Edgar said. "I do. And I figure that... that we can work through this."

"I'm so sorry," she hiccupped into his chest, the words distorted by her crying. Got she was so sick of this, but she just couldn't seem to stop. Trying hard to get a grip on herself, she propped her chin up on his chest and looked up at him through wet eyes as she sniffled, "I'll do anything. I'll do whatever it takes."

"I know," Edgar said. He didn't forgive her, and he didn't trust her, but he couldn't let it be over. They were both so young, and they both made mistakes, and they both had to learn to really take care of one another, and be there for one another, and help one another.

"I didn't do this just so you'd talk to me, you know," Dorcas said suddenly. "I didn't mean to. I wasn't trying to manipulate you or anything. I really am trying not to be so selfish and stuff."

"Dor, I know," Edgar said. "Are you going to come home with me?"

"Yeah," Dorcas said, turn her head again to press her cheek against his chest, not loosening her grip on him one bit. "Just give me a second? Thinking I'd ruined the best thing I've ever had in my life, was just... And I mean, saying all that to you, and not knowing what you'd say back... that was about the hardest thing I've ever done. Just give me a second."

Edgar held her tightly, and kissed the top of her head. He knew that they could get through this and grow up together. They needed to really get to know one another, and prepare themselves for change, and just... _try_ not to give up on one another. He almost had. Dorcas had pushed Edgar so hard that he'd wanted to give up on her for good. He knew he'd regret it. He already regretted even entertaining the thought.

After a few moments of just standing together, holding onto Ed, Dorcas took a deep breath. Even if he didn't think of her the same way, he still loved her, and everything would be okay. "All right, let's go home. I'm exhausted."

***

The crib was finally put together, sanded and stained, and Edgar wiped his sweaty forehead, surveying it proudly for a moment. It looked like it could've come from a store, he thought, or like it was some custom-made thing, which he supposed it was. He removed his gloves and touched a finger to the top of the rocking chair; he'd finished the changing table and dresser earlier, and he and his father had already taken them downstairs. The rocking chair was last next to the crib, and was ready, and Edgar picked it up and headed inside.

His mother smiled at him as he walked through the kitchen with it, and told him to wait as she ran into the sitting room quickly. She came back with the cushions she'd made for it (of pretty green print with dancing teddy bears on it) and set it in the rocking chair's seat and kissed him on the cheek before letting him go down the basement steps.

In the nursery he found Dorcas sitting on the floor.

She looked up as he walked in and smiled. She was getting used to the idea of the whole... parent thing. The nice, bright, pale yellow walls made the room sunny and happy, and the furniture was all stained a nice, warm colour. It was a good room. Dorcas liked it, and being in it made her feel like she was getting ready. She held up a plushie rocket she'd found, and a pillow sized yellow star.

"There was a garage sale up the block. I found these there. Do you like them? They're sort of boyish, but you know, with the middle name, I thought it was appropriate. This furniture is all really great, by the way. You're really good at making stuff," she said carefully. Things were still a little unsure with her and Edgar, especially where baby preparations were concerned. "Can I test out the rocking chair?"

"Thank you," Edgar said, setting the chair down and tying the cushions on. "And of course you can. And I like the plushies, yeah. Mum found some more material that kind of matches the bears, with stars on it. She wants to show it to you and see what you think."

"Sure, I'll go take a look in a bit," Dorcas said, and got to her feet, coming to stand next to him by the rocking chair. He'd hardly looked at her for more than a few seconds straight since he'd been back, and they hardly ever touched. They hadn't had sex yet, either. She reached out and put her hand on his hip, sliding it up underneath his shirt. "Ed."

"I've got stain on me, from the crib," he said uncomfortably. "And bits of wood and dust. I should shower."

Dorcas dropped her hand and sat down in the rocking chair. "You don't want me anymore, do you? If you're only doing this because of the baby, Ed, I don't... I don't want you if you can't even stand to look at me."

"It's not just... Dor," Edgar said, struggling for words. Every time he looked at her, he saw her with Katie Shacklebolt, and it killed him. Every time they touched he started imagining someone else touching Dorcas, her carrying someone else's baby... all sorts of stupid, impossible things that just made him want to throw up. He was afraid to have sex with her. He was afraid of what sorts of tricks his mind might play on him when he was so focussed on her. "I want to," he said. "I do. It's just. It's hard."

"If you can't forgive me, I don't know what I'm doing here," she whispered, as though the words were too hard to say at full volume, and curled her hands around the arms of the rocking chair.

He knelt down so he was at eye level with her and said, "How about, I shower, and you order take-away, and we'll watch a movie together."

Dorcas shrunk away from him and nodded, not trusting her voice. That wasn't an agreement or a denial. Well, she'd stay until he was sure. If there was even a little chance that he could forgive her, she'd fight for it. He had to know that.

"Okay," he said, and then left the room, going into the bathroom and starting the water. Climbing in and reaching for the body wash he wondered what was wrong with him and how he could take her back but not really take her back. She was in the wrong, yes, but it wasn't fair to Dorcas to be so distant and unsure; they'd never get back to normal--or anything resembling normal--if he didn't forgive her and move past it. Putting all his energy into the baby did not equate fixing what had happened between him and Dorcas.

He loved her, he did, more than he could properly express to her. He needed to show her that he believed her, and knew she was honest, and that he could... Oh. He _could_ trust her.

Dropping the bottle of shampoo into the tub, Edgar suddenly realized that he'd forgiven her.

He almost killed himself rushing out of the shower, and left the water running as he threw the door open to see her dialling the phone. "Dorcas," he said breathlessly, dripping wet, and grabbed either side of her face, bending and pulling their lips together.

Dorcas wasn't sure what was going on in Ed's head, but she wasn't about to question it. She abandoned the phone and wrapped her arms around Ed's neck, giving her all to the kiss.

Edgar slid his hands under Dorcas' shirt, running his hands over her belly and breasts before pulling it off over her head. He walked them back toward the bed, and pushing her back onto it and crawling on top of her said, "I'm sorry."

"It's okay," she said, looking at him with a ghost of a smile. "Really. It's _really_ okay." Finally, she couldn't help but laugh as he started kissing her neck. He was all wet from the shower and sliding against her and she didn't care. She just wanted all of her clothes off and out of the way. She was so happy she could cry. "So you still want me, I guess?"

"Yes," Edgar breathed, trailing kisses from her neck to her chest as he slid a hand under her back and unclipped her bra. "And I don't want you to _ever_ think that I don't. Even when your tits are all saggy and you're wearing muumuus."

"Good," Dorcas said, grabbing his face with both hands and pulling it to hers, kissing him as she arched her back for him to get her bra off. "And I'll never wear muumuus. I'm going to be a cool old person."

Edgar tossed her bra on the floor somewhere, and then hastily tugged at the elastic of the maternity trousers Sherry had given Dorcas to wear. "Christ, these are so much more convenient than trousers with buttons," Edgar mumbled, pulling them over her arse and down.

Dorcas lifted her hips as best she could for him to get her remaining clothes off, and when she felt his cock hard against her thigh, she just felt a rush. He wanted her. Sure, he'd said so, but she could _feel_ it now, feel exactly how much he wanted her, and she'd never felt anything better than that. She wanted him so badly. Wanted _only_ him, and her mind was so far away from Katie it was hard to believe that hardly a week ago Katie had been on top of her like this. It wasn't about her, though, it was about Ed.

"Ed, please," she begged, biting at the stubble-roughened skin where his neck met his jaw. She loved the feeling of his stubble rubbing against her face. She loved everything about him.

Once her panties were off, Edgar moved between her legs, kneeing them apart. He was so hard he was throbbing, and her pushed into her with a groan, biting down on her shoulder.

Dorcas couldn't help but throw her head back, feeling more than a little overcome. A week was the longest she'd ever gone without sex with Ed since they'd first gotten together, and she hadn't missed it that much _just_ because she liked sex. She'd missed being connected to him. She always felt so close to him when they were fucking, and right now was no exception.

She dug her fingernails hard into his back, pulling him as close as she could and gasping for air all the while. Right now, she thought she could just do this forever, lay beneath him with him inside of her and above her and all around her.

"I love you," she said as soon as she was able to meet his eyes. "I love _you_ , Edgar Bones."

"I love you, too," Edgar replied, kissing her lips and her nose and her cheeks and her chin as he thrust into her, reaching back and lifting her legs around his waist.

Dorcas let him reposition her legs, linking them around his waist. It felt better for both of them, anyway, in the position he put her in, and she was already starting to feel her nerve endings tingle everywhere.

Edgar wrapped his arms behind her so he was holding her tightly, and buried his face in the crook of her neck, covering the skin with quick, frantic kisses.

Her orgasm hit her fast and intense, and she couldn't help but cry out. It felt like she was folding in on the core of herself and she shuddered against Ed, tightening her legs and arms around him. It was almost like sensory overload, and she wondered if it was so intense because she'd missed him so much or because it had been a few days or because she was just so completely happy that they were on the track to all right, but whatever it was, it left Dorcas panting. Ed hadn't come yet, though, and so she moaned, "Don't stop. Keep... oh _fuck_."

Edgar's thrusts became harder and more erratic the closer he came to coming. Edgar bit Dorcas' earlobe, then sucked on it before whispering in her ear, " _Fuck_ I missed you."

"I missed you too," she answered, her voice breathy and disconnected, and Dorcas felt like she might come again at any second, and she angled her hips up, still seeing stars, and ran her hand through Edgar's sopping wet hair. "Holy _fuck_ , Ed, I think I might..."

Edgar slammed into her then, coming hard, shaking as he gripped her so roughly he was afraid he might crack her in two.

Dorcas cried out as he came, feeling a similar response of her own, perhaps not quite as intense as the first time, but different and more satisfying in its own way as it left her feeling weak and almost drunk with heady satisfaction. She didn't mind how hard he was holding onto her, because it meant he was feeling the same things she was, and she just buried her face against his skin, shivering as the aftershocks sent little zaps up and down her entire body.

Finally, she managed to peel her face off of his still wet shoulder, looking up at him satedly. "If that's make up sex, I think we should fight more often."

Edgar laughed, a satisfied grin stretched across his face, not ready to pull out of her just yet. "Yeah, but we should pick a new position. We're going to squish the baby if we keep it up."

"It feels fine," Dorcas said, finally letting her arms and legs fall back to the bed heavily, releasing her grip on him simply because she felt all shaky and half numb and it was too much effort to keep it up. "Not too much pressure on it or anything, I mean. That was seriously the best fucking sex of my _life_."

"Mm," Edgar agreed, and pulled out of her, rolling onto his back. "I'm sorry it took me so long to get around to it."

"I don't think you're in any position to be apologizing to _me_ ," Dorcas pointed out, managing to flop onto her side to nestle herself against him. She felt pleasantly gooey, but she could hear the shower still on in the background and thought maybe they'd have another go in there once they both got their strength up. "What does this mean, Bonesie?"

"I think it means that we're okay," Edgar answered, wrapping his arms around her.

Dorcas closed her eyes and replayed the words over and over in her head. Finally, she took a breath and said softly, "Thank you. For forgiving me."

"Well you should've known I would," Edgar said quietly, pulling her close against him.

"No. I would've deserved it if you hadn't," she said softly, nuzzling his jaw and pressing kisses into it. "Anyway, I'm trying not to take you for granted anymore. I know I'm lucky to have you."

"We all make mistakes, Dorcas," Edgar said. "It's easier to work through problems than to hate someone. I could never hate you."

"Good. If you did, I'd have to live with my _parents_ ," Dorcas said and wrinkled her nose. "Though, actually, mother was pretty good through all this."

"Enough talking about serious things," Edgar said, suddenly realizing that he'd left the shower running. "I didn't tire you out too much, did I?" he asked with a cheeky grin, "because I was kind of hoping we both had shower sex on the brain."

"Yeah, that's why we're soul mates," Dorcas said with a slow smile. "And the day you're up for sex and _I'm_ not is the day I change my name to Lame Pants McGee."

"I guess we'll have a good marriage, then," Edgar said. "Everyone'll be complaining about their wives not putting out, and I'll just sit there with a tired grin on my face."

***

"I shouldn't be worried, right?" Dorcas asked Edgar as she pulled her bright blue hoodie on, zipping it halfway up. "I mean, the doctor didn't seem worried, did he? It's fine."

"It was just a routine thing, Dor," Edgar said. "He didn't look worried to me. And he'll be back in a minute."

"Right," Dorcas said, taking Ed's hand. Just, with everything that had happened and with them saying before that she needed to keep her stress levels down, she'd been worried that maybe something might have happened.

Just then, the doctor knocked twice before cracking the door. He smiled at the couple before stepping into the room. "All dressed, I see. I have some pictures for you to take home here too."

"Everything's okay though?" Edgar asked, as the doctor handed him the folder he was carrying.

"Well, Miss Meadows needs to keep watching her blood pressure closely, but it's nothing I haven't told you before," the doctor said. "Now, I can point something out to you, if you like. Did you want to know the sex of the baby?"

"Yes!" Dorcas said immediately, enthusiastic about the idea as well as relieved that everything was going well with the pregnancy. "What is it? I totally want to know. We want to know, right Ed?"

Edgar laughed and nodded. "Yeah, we'd like to know."

The doctor grinned at them and then moved toward them, asking Edgar to open the folder he'd been given. As far as Edgar was concerned the picture looked like a blurry sea monkey, but the doctor traced his fingers over the lines. "Some babies like to hide in the womb, but yours obviously wants to make it very clear who it is," the doctor said, pointing at one spot. "She's facing right toward us, and I can tell you with 95% accuracy that she's a she."

"It's a girl," Dorcas said, and then grinned, correcting herself. "I mean, _she's_ a girl. Michele Rocket Bones. Ed. It's a girl. We're having a little girl!"

"We are!" Edgar agreed, smiling widely. Knowing it--no, _she_ \--had a gender made it so much more real. "Michele," Edgar said.

"Rocket?" the doctor questioned, a little amused.

"Michele Rocket Bones," Dorcas said again. She leaned forward and pressed a happy kiss to Ed's lips, brushing his hair back and tucking it behind his ear tenderly before pulling away and smirking at the doctor. "I picked the middle name."

"I suppose I shouldn't be surprised," the doctor answered, heading back to the door. "You can leave whenever you like. Don't forget to make another appointment with the receptionist, and keep the blood pressure down, Miss Meadows. We don't want to have any problems with Michele."

Dorcas heard the doctor, but instead of responding, she just grinned at Edgar. "We're having a girl. Oh, you'll be so sweet with a little girl, Eddie."

Edgar made a totally serious face and asked, "Are you going to let me dress her in pink? And wear dresses with lace on them, and tights with frills on the bum, and all that?"

"Not a chance," Dorcas said, wrinkling her nose and pinching Ed on the arm for teasing her. "Okay, well, maybe the tights, because that's fucking cute. But she can wear blue and green and yellow and red and any other colour except pink. I fucking hate pink."

"We're going to get pink stuff, Dor," Edgar said, grinning now. "Because you _know_ the girls are going to throw you a baby shower and smother you with pink bows and onesies and feeding blankets."

"Gag," Dorcas said, but she was smiling. "We're having a girl!"

"Yes, we are. We're going to have a daughter," Edgar said, wrapping his arms around Dorcas' shoulder. "Michele Bones."

"Michele _Rocket_ Bones, actually," Dorcas answered. "Don't forget her middle name."

"Oh, _never_ ," Edgar teased, smiling wryly. "That's what I'll call her every time she's a brat!"

Dorcas laughed and swatted Edgar.

They were having a girl.


	24. Movin' On Up (June 23rd, 2007)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Where there is farting, a sore arse, and a _really_ hot bird.

"Fuck this bed, Aidan, Christ!" Sirius groaned, hoisting his end of the frame as he and Aidan attempted to manoeuvre Aidan's bed around the last landing and up the last flight of stairs before finally getting it into Aidan and Hestia's new flat. "Shit, shit, pull up a bit, I'm losing my grip and it's going to smash me right in the fucking face."

"Sorry, okay. That better?" Aidan called, grunting a little as he pulled the bed towards him. "I should've gone on the bottom. I have better upper body strength than you."

"None of you complain. That's a bed. This! Oh, this, on the other hand," James said, pausing to curse as he smashed his hand between the wall and the hard wood of the armoire Ed had made. "This is solid, sharp, and fucking heavy! Next time, mate, get a flat on the ground floor or a building with a bigger elevator."

"Buggering shit," Edgar said. "I knew I should've used lighter wood. This is fucking torture!"

"How much is left to bring up again?" Sirius whined as he managed to step up onto the landing, and Aidan starting backing up the stairs.

"Doesn't matter. That's the last load for now," Dorcas called up the hallway. "Hurry up and get that in here. Hestia and I made margaritas. It's break time."

Once the four of them had managed to get the bed and the wardrobe in the apartment, they collapsed around the kitchen table that Hestia and Dorcas had cleared off and set drinks on. "Seriously, though, Aidan," Edgar said, breathing hard and sweating. "Didn't you say you'd looked at a place on the ground floor of some building?"

"This one's bigger," Hestia said. "And cheaper. Suck it up, all of you, it's good exercise."

"Says you, unpacking ruddy boxes," Sirius said, but he was grinning.

"She's helping me take it easy, and I'm on doctor's orders," Dorcas replied, smirking. "We did find something interesting though. Ed, you were fucking wiry when you were little. And you looked like a shit starter."

"What did you find?" Aidan asked, smiling. "Pictures?"

"Yeah, an album," Hestia said, handing it to Aidan, smirking. "Cowboy boots and boxer shorts are a real classy fashion statement, Lynch."

Edgar burst out laughing. "I remember that! Fucking Lucy Welsh, man. That was _hilarious_." Looking up at Dorcas he waggled his eyebrows and said, "And we _were_ shit starters. You have _no_ idea."

Aidan blushed a little and shrugged at his girlfriend, pulling her onto his lap and dipping her sideways for a dramatic kiss. When embarrassed, snog the distractions away. It was a new tactic Aidan was trying out.

"Well, he's a classy sort of bloke, our Aidan," James said, rolling his eyes as he reached for a glass of the pink slushy liquid, not surprised to find the proclaimed margaritas to be alcohol free. "I don't even remember what's in that book. Give it here, let's have a look."

Aidan handed the book off to James and Sirius, who immediately started flicking through the pages. The first few were just random pictures taken during grade school; making faces, mooning one another, and trying to look cool while flipping off the camera. "I was an ugly child," Sirius moaned, dramatically, looking at a picture taken one Halloween where he was wearing a Wolverine costume. "Why did we think it was cool to be X-Men again?"

"Because it _was_ cool to be X-Men," James said, giving Sirius an affronted look. "Everything we did was cool. What's wrong with you?"

Aidan promptly burst out laughing as James flipped the page absently, still looking at Sirius. Dropping his eyes down to look at the picture, James snorted. It was him, Sirius, Aidan, Edgar, and Davy standing next to a poster for Fight Club, all striking completely ridiculous poses.

"Oh man. Remember that day?" James snickered.

"I remember Sirius trying to hit on the woman who took this photo, is what I remember," Aidan replied, hoping to avoid reliving the whole memory out in front of his girlfriend. He sort of wanted for her to think he was cool, and not the sort of guy that would get kicked out of a theatre for, well. "She was like, twenty and beautiful and he was, what, hardly fourteen. It was hilarious that he even thought he had a shot."

"Hey now," Sirius said, warningly. "She did tell me to call her in five years. Guess I missed that boat though."

Glancing over Sirius' shoulder, Edgar laughed at his fourteen-year-old self, who was doing a horrible impression of Edward Norton's character. "I'll tell you what I remember," he said, looking right at Aidan, grinning. "I remember that I _won_ , is what."

"Okay, stop being douche bags and tell us what the fuck you're talking about," Dorcas said impatiently. "What happened? What's so funny about you lot being retarded in front of a Fight Club poster?"

"It was amazing. Dorcas, your boyfriend is a _machine_..." James started.

"Before James starts running off at the mouth," Aidan interrupted, and gave Hestia an apologetic smile, "I would like to put in the disclaimer that I was young and would never do anything so gross _now_. Probably."

***

"I am Jack's complete lack of surprise," James whispered, grinning ear to ear. "Let's pretend you're the Department of Transportation and you discover that our company intentionally did nothing about leather seats cured in third world countries with chemicals we know cause birth defects? Brake linings that fail after a thousand miles? Fuel injectors that burn people alive?" He watched the screen raptly, listened to some of the dialogue, shook his head at the sheer brilliance of Jack beating the shit out of himself, and then chimed in again for, "I am Jack's smirking revenge."

"Shut up, Potter," Davy hissed, but he was grinning, and James had seen his lips moving along earlier.

Fight Club was pretty much the best movie ever, and they all knew it. This was the fourth time they'd been to see it since it had come out last week.

James couldn't help but burst out laughing as the security guards busted into Jack's boss' office on the big screen, and mid-laugh let out a rumbling fart.

The other four boys looked at James with a cross between amusement and disgust on their faces (the smell was rancid), and Sirius followed suit, leaning on one cheek in his chair and letting out a killer (and slightly wet-sounding) response to James.

James giggled at Sirius' action, and then shoved his friend back into the middle of his seat. "Rank."

Aidan was covering his mouth and nose, half to stop himself laughing too loudly and half at the smell. When he managed to calm himself enough to remove his hand from his face, he leaned forward in his chair, grabbing both armrests and squeaking out a long, high pitched sounding bit of gas, not about to be totally shown up by the other two. It was either make fun or join in anyway, and mates stuck together.

Davy shook his head and waved a hand in front of his face, despite laughing along with the rest at Aidan's addition to the gross smell spreading outward from their little group. "Christ, what have you lot been _eating_?"

"Shh!" someone hissed from somewhere behind him.

Another girl, a few seats away whispered, "That's totally disgusting."

Davy gave her a little wave before lifting a leg in her direction and tooting his support of his friends.

Edgar had had enough fart wars with his brother and father. The rules were long standing in any game, and if you could clear people away from wherever you were, then you _won_. Jon had taught Edgar all the fundamentals where _real_ farting was concerned, and leaning to the side he let out of the loudest, most vile fart of his life, just as onscreen, Tyler Durden said, "You're going to start a fight and you're going to _lose_."

Aidan and James both groaned loudly, coughing at the smell wafting their way. The two girls a few seats over from Davy got up and left, as did an older couple in front of them.

James, laughing so hard his eyes were watering above where his shirt was pulled up to cover his nose and mouth, said, "You sick, sick fucker. You win. And you're _rank_."

"You started it," Aidan reminded him, voice muffled by the popcorn bag he held to his mouth to cover the smell.

Edgar leaned back in his chair with his arms behind his head, grinning widely. "Don't mess with the best, baby."

"Yeah, well, the best just got us kicked out of Fight Club," James said, snickering as a guy with a flashlight showed up. "Figures. Whatever. Like we don't have the whole movie memorized anyway."

"You do, anyway," Davy said, getting up. "Come on, we've caused enough shit for one night. James'll re-enact it for us in the street, won't you Potter?"

"That can't be healthy, Ed," Sirius said as the five of them shuffled out of their seats and toward the door. "Do you have a dead animal up your arse or something?"

"Nah, that's just fucking talent, is what that is," Edgar said. "And I'll never show you lot, either. I'll save it to pass down to my sons; generations of putrid Bones boys, clearing out movie theatres. What a legacy!"

***

"Sick," Dorcas laughed. "I'm so glad we're having a girl. You're not teaching her that. I'm all for obscenity, but that? Is fucking nasty."

James was snickering away as he sipped the refreshing strawberry drink. "Ah, and to think, it was all my doing."

"If I were there, I would've won, but Sirius and James were _arseholes_ and never let me hang out with them when they were with you lot," Hestia said. " _My_ farts _own_."

"Hey, if that's a challenge, Hestia," Edgar said, smiling and quirking an eyebrow, "I'm not opposed to a re-match. You can take Davy's place."

Aidan, for his part, was staring at Hestia, equally aghast and awed. "Do I have the coolest girlfriend ever? Even if she is a little gross? I think I do."

"Well, you're allowed to claim coolest girlfriend as long as I still own the coolest wife category," James said graciously.

Dorcas snorted and was about to kick Ed to clue him in that he ought to fight for coolest girlfriend, but at the last second she stilled her leg and just took a drink. Ed might have forgiven her, but things were still weird. Besides, she was still working on forgiving herself.

"Hey, now," Edgar said, glancing at Dorcas. "Until Hestia's given you a blowjob in the kitchen while your parents are eating dinner, I'm afraid Dor is still tops in that category."

Dorcas smiled at Ed, and then kicked him anyway for good measure. God, she fucking loved him, and she had no idea what she'd done to deserve him, but he was hers and she was going to make damn sure he stayed that way. "That's right, I am."

"Ah, call me a poor sport, but that sounds more scary than hot," Aidan said. "I guess I'm not as daring as you lot."

"Don't worry about it, Lynch," James said. "I'm normal too. Bones and Sirius here are just weird. You've heard of some of Sirius' stories."

"It was more the surprise than the location, to be honest," Edgar said with a shrug.

"And hey, don't drag me into the fetishes category. Remus is the kink, not me," Sirius said. "I just like trying new things."

"Well you don't fucking discourage him, that's for sure," James said, rolling his eyes at his friend. "You're hardly an unwilling participant, Pads."

"Enough, enough," Aidan said, laughing and pulling the photo album towards himself and Hestia.

He flipped through the next few pages quickly (they were shots from Christmas with his family, and interesting really only to him), before he came across another of he and his mates, taken about a year after the one they'd just looked at. Sirius looked drugged and groggy, and he was proudly holding up a clear plastic pill bottle. They were in what Aidan knew to be the waiting room at the hospital and the pill bottle held two metal bebe pellets, though the contents couldn't be made out in the photo. The rest of them were propping Sirius up and laughing wildly.

"Hey guys, remember this? It's from the June before you two went off to boarding school," Aidan said, holding the book up to show the others. "That was after our poker night and Sirius was four hundred quid in the hole."

Sirius groaned. "We're not telling this story. No fucking way. I haven't even told _Remus_ this story, and he's always after it because there are _still_ scars on my arse."

"Why's he look so fucked up in that picture?" Hestia asked. "Is he high?"

"Hell yes," James snickered. "Higher than a kite. They gave him morphine."

"You're not seriously going to make us ask, are you?" Dorcas sighed. "Obviously you're fucking telling us. Bonesie, story time."

"Well, like Aidan said, we were playing poker and Sirius was four hundred ruddy quid in, and couldn't pay up, so he offered to do _whatever we wanted_ to pay his dues," Edgar explained.

"Fuck the lot of you," Sirius said gruffly, crossing his arms over his chest.

***

"Yes, but I don't _have_ four hundred quid, Lynch," Sirius said, throwing his cards on the table. "I can't pay you, and you lot are cheating arsewipes anyhow, so I think the entire fucking game was a setup and _I want my money back_."

"Temperamental princess," Edgar laughed. "You should've played smarter with your money in the first place, Black. Then you'd still have it, wouldn't you?"

"All right, all right. Calm down," James said, because Sirius looked about ready to blow. "We're all friends here. Let's just strike a bargain."

"I'd rather just have the four hundred pounds," Aidan said with a grin. "And buck up, Black. You know I wasn't cheating. I'm just a natural at poker."

"Don't know how. Farm boy's got no bloody poker face to speak of," Davy pointed out, taking a swig of the beef they'd nicked from upstairs. His dad wasn't likely to notice anyway, or he'd just think he'd just forgotten drinking it. Ruddy drunk. "And you know he isn't paying you, Lynch, so you have to decide what to make him do to make up for it."

"Whatever," Sirius agreed, indifferent. "Not like Lynch is going to come up with something worthwhile or fucking creative. And I'm _not_ shoveling cow shit, so don't even think about it."

"Hey, hey, Lynch," Edgar said, grinning, elbowing Aidan and pointing in the direction of the corner of the room, where two or three of Davy's old bebe guns were sitting.

"We're not _shooting_ him, are you fucking off your nut?" James said, glaring at Edgar.

"Well, not from up close," Davy said thoughtfully. "But from a ways away, those won't do much damage. We could shoot him from a distance."

Aidan looked unsure. "That seems... unnecessarily mean."

Sirius raised his eyebrows. "What do you mean, 'shoot him from a distance'?" he asked.

"Well. We could sit on the roof," Edgar said. "And we don't actually have to _hit_ him, Lynch, just... shoot them off in the same vicinity he's in."

"As in 'dance, monkey, dance' sort of shooting?" James asked, seemingly perking up now that Sirius didn't appear to be at risk of _death_. "I could go for that. No offence, mate."

Davy grinned. "There's a box of ammunition in the cupboard by the telly. He could be made to run around in the back yard."

"Hello? Still sitting here!" Sirius said.

"Yeah, that's good, but there's got to be a way to add insult to injury," Edgar said, ignoring Sirius. "If he's going to run around like a chicken with his head cut off, he might as well do it with some style."

"You're thinking starkers, aren't you?" James said gleefully, now fully on board with the idea. "What do you think, Lynch? That worth four hundred quid?"

"Maybe," Aidan said with a lopsided smile. "Yeah, pretty damn close."

" That is worth far more than four hundred quid," Sirius said, frowning. "And there's no _fucking_ way I'm letting you _shoot me_ while I'm _starkers_."

"Well, there's a four hundred pound fee to beg out, so I don't suppose you've got a choice," Davy said, lurching to his feet, putting the beer down on the poker table, and heading for the guns. "I've got three, which works. One for me, one for Bones, and one for Lynch. Potter can sit at the top of the roof and keep watch for neighbours."

"Oh, come on. You fuckers always make me keep watch!" James complained. "I'm a type A personality. That means a leader. Just because I'm younger than you..."

"Means you have to keep watch while we shoot at your mate," Davy said with a grin. "Come on, do you want to shoot at Black anyway?"

James thought about it for a moment. "No, but I want to watch."

"And you'll be able to see from the top of the roof just fine," Aidan put in. "Come on. No time like the present."

"I hate you all," Sirius said, but he was game for anything really, and was already pulling his shirt off over his head. "And what is it with you and starkers, Bonesie? Playing for the other team?"

"Fuck you," Edgar said. "This is my way of getting you back for making me walk through the ruddy _community pool_ starkers. Least we're not making you dance in front of all the girls from school."

Sirius grinned. "You _loved_ it, Bones."

"Well, you know what they say about swishy blonds," James teased, swatting at Edgar's shaggy hair. "Hey, maybe you should have a heart to heart with Fabian. He's a nice bloke. Bet he'd help you through this trying, emotional time in your life."

"If I'm a ponce, then Lynch is the queen of England," Edgar said, and as a means of reinforcing this, he turned away as Sirius pulled off his trousers.

"Hey, I wouldn't care. I'm all for embracing the man love," James snickered, and reached out to shove Sirius as his jeans were down around his ankles, laughing as his friend toppled over and into the poker table. "Oh, no balance? Sorry mate. Thought you'd be used to having your trousers round your ankles. You've been hanging out with Patricia Glenwood enough lately."

"Now who's the ponce?" Aidan said, giving James a look. "Man love, Potter?"

"I'm protected from any outlandish accusations on my heterosexuality by a deep and lasting love for Lily Evans," James said without even blinking. "Don't be jealous I've already found my soul mate."

"Oh, not this rubbish again," Davy said from where he sat, loading the pellet guns. "You met her once when you were eleven, you freak."

"And I saw her three separate other times at church functions!" James said. "It's fate. We'll be together one day."

"Patricia Glenwood has _really_ nice tits," Sirius commented, kicking his trousers off and climbing to his feet. "And Lily Evans is Potter's beard," Sirius explained, tugging off his pants. "As long as he keeps up the charade, pretending to be in love with some bint who pushed him into a lake, he'll never have to admit to himself and the rest of us that he's a big flaming fairy."

"Not!" James protested. "Our love runs as deep as a... really deep river! There's plenty of great, heterosexual love in this heart. In fact, I picture her naked when I wank."

"Mate, ew! You met her when you were eleven!" Aidan protested, giving James a look of disgust.

"Last time I saw her was this summer! I picture the pretty, 'hello, I'm fourteen and not pre-pubescent' Lily Evans," James explained quickly. "Fucker. Why would I think about an eleven year old girl? That's weird."

"Yeah, so is running into the girl you supposedly love and not even talking to her," Davy said, getting up and passing out the loaded guns. "If you're done stripping, you pervert, you can go wait out back. You could've taken your clothes off outside, you know."

"I'm an exhibitionist," Sirius said. "I'm proud of my bits."

"Wouldn't know why," Edgar said, taking a gun as Davy handed him one.

"Hah! Pillow-biter! You _have_ been ogling my bollocks!" Sirius said, grinning madly.

"Hey, who's got a gun?" Edgar asked, waving his above his head. "Get the fuck out of the house, Black."

"Honestly. Don't wave it around, Ed," James said, giving the blond boy a look not unlike something one might see on his mother's face. "That's how someone loses an eye."

"Okay, so we've established Bones got an eyeful of Sirius' bollocks, Potter, in fact, has no bollocks, or perchance they belong to his harem of men because he's an enormous poofter, and now we're just standing around chatting with a naked bloke," Davy said, and then gestured to the stairs going up. "Roof is that way."

James hopped over a chair in his way and headed for the door. "While I think you got most of that wrong, I am rather impressed with your opinions about my stamina. A whole harem, huh? I could totally do it. My endurance is phenomenal."

"Mate, you're a virgin," Aidan pointed out, following James up the stairs.

"So're you!" James called over his shoulder.

" _I'm not_!" Sirius sing-songed up after them gleefully, before heading outside.

"I'm not, either," Edgar chirped in, smiling smugly, because everything was a contest between the five of them, and it was always nice to win.

"Shut up," Davy said, rolling his eyes, pushing past James and and going to open the window over the kitchen sink. It led out onto the garage roof, and from there they could climb up onto the main roof and head to the part that over looked the back yard. As soon as he was out, Davy called, "Come on, it's easy."

Aidan shrugged and followed, going out feet first and grinning. "I wish it was this easy to get onto my roof."

"You're telling me. I leave the rubbish bins turned over round front and I can get in and out of the house this way when I don't want to wake dad," Davy admitted. "Comes in handy."

"I can imagine," Edgar said, coming out next and peering down into the dark backyard where Sirius was standing. "All right, Black?" he called.

"As good as I can be standing here starkers waiting for the lot of you to shoot at me!" Sirius called back.

James launched himself out after them just as Aidan was hopping up one level and walked over, crouching at a good spot on the edge of the roof. James started to follow him, then made a face and went to sit at the peak of the roof. "This is the last time I keep watch. You hear me? Last fucking time!"

"Yeah, yeah," Aidan said, smiling kindly at him as he sat just above Davy, bracing his legs against the chimney. "So I get to shoot first, right, considering it's me he owes the money?"

"Go for it," Edgar agreed, sitting next to Aidan.

Aidan took aim for a spot about a foot to the left of Sirius so it'd hit the ground hopefully close enough to scare him. Aidan knew enough about guns, considering he was the only boy in his family and they lived on a farm. His dad had taught him the basics, and so Aidan's aim wasn't bad. The pellets went exactly where he'd intended them to when he pulled the trigger, and he didn't even jump for the noise.

Turning his head, Sirius looked on the ground where the pellet had hit, and then up at the roof. "That's the best you've got?" he challenged.

"Relax, I was just getting my bearings," Aidan said, and shifted just a little. "Hey Sirius? Might want to move your hand in, oh, about _now_."

Sirius jumped, and felt the pellet breeze past his hand and into the grass.

Edgar lifted the gun up and aimed. "Left foot!" he called to Sirius gamely, causing Sirius to hop out of the way, but in the wrong direction. The pellet nearly missed his _right_ foot.

"Not on, Bones!" Sirius called up to him.

"Hey!" James shouted from his spot at the top, craning his neck to see what was going on. "Be careful!"

"Aw, your girlfriend's watching out for you," Davy said with a smirk. "Hey Black? I'm going to aim for your feet. Both. You might want to run."

And with that, Davy shot three times, each successively closer to Sirius until he started moving.

"Hey!" Sirius called up to them. "Watch where the fuck you're aiming, Gudgeon! You're going to hit me!"

"I am not," Davy said, laughing. "I'm a great shot. Better than Lynch, even."

To emphasize this, Davy shot and hit a tree at the edge of the property. It splintered a little right behind Sirius' head.

"Fucking Christ!" Sirius said, turning and jumping, his naked arse sailing through the air.

Davy guffawed loudly, and turned to grin at Aidan, accidentally pulling the trigger twice in quick succession while not even looking down at Sirius.

Sirius yelled _really_ loudly as the pellets hit him hard in his left arse cheek, and fell to the ground. "Christ, shitting... _Jesus_ , ow! Who just shot me?"

"Oh fuck," Edgar said, his eyes going wide. "Gudgeon, mate, you hit him!"

"You fuckers! I knew this was a bad idea!" James hollered, getting up and running for the kitchen window. He was through the house and down the stairs, bolting out the door to the back yard in record time, though the others weren't far behind. "Mate, you all right? Oh, fuck, you're bleeding."

"Shit, bugger, sorry!" Davy called as he dropped his gun on the downstairs couch and ran out the back. "Bloody hell, I'm a prick. I didn't mean to!"

"Oh Christ," Aidan swore. "Hey, should I call an ambulance or something?"

"Uh, maybe," Edgar said. "Pretty sure he needs to get the pellets un-lodged. And maybe be doped up so he can't feel anything."

"Fucking _shit_!" Sirius moaned into the grass. "Fuck, fuck, Christ, damn, bloody, buggering, sodding _hell_ , this _hurts_!" he added, gritting his teeth.

"Okay, okay," James said, thinking fast as he knelt next to his friend. "Okay, Bones, you call an ambulance. Lynch, get his clothes and bring them here. And, like, a towel or something. And Davy, put the guns way. You're such a fucking idiot."

"I didn't mean to!" Davy wailed, feeling horrible. "Honestly. I wasn't even _looking_."

"Which is why I said you're an idiot instead of fucking beating the snot out of you," James snarled. "You were supposed to shoot _at_ him, not _shoot him_. Now what are you waiting for? Go!"

***

"They loaded me onto the ambulance on my stomach with my trousers pulled down over my arse," Sirius said, having gotten into the story somewhere in the middle despite his initial protests. "And that lot made Davy explain to the paramedics what the fuck happened."

"So _that's_ where that came from?" Hestia asked, cocking her head. "You always told me it was a birthmark."

"That's because he's a dirty rotten liar," James said amiably. "And I wasn't being a total mother hen. I was merely... concerned for the welfare of my best mate."

"You totally _were_ being a total mother hen," Aidan said, snickering. "You should've seen him fly into action. It was quite impressive. And don't complain, Potter. I bet that's what makes you such a bloody good father."

"Christ, Davy was such a prick sometimes," Edgar said fondly. "The bastard's never around anymore, though."

"Hang the fuck on," Dorcas said suddenly, looking between Edgar and Sirius. "You two had lost your virginity by the time you were _fifteen_? What the fuck, you sluts. Even I was older than that."

"Well, according to Remus I did it because I was 'suppressing my homosexual tendencies' or something to that effect," Sirius said. "Some Freudian crap, I don't know."

Edgar shrugged. "Jon'll never admit it to you, or even Sherry for that matter, but he skeezed around when I was younger, and like any annoying older brother, liked to rub it in my face. It was nice to have something to throw back at him, even if it didn't really mean much in the long run."

Dorcas refrained from commenting about Ed's explanation in favour of giving Sirius a look. "Fuck, man, you are so fucking _whipped_ by that fairy boy of yours."

"When he's right, he's right," Sirius answered quietly.

Dorcas' look changed, and she sat back in her chair, folding her arms. "Stop being such a faggot. Since when do you let anyone call Remus names?"

"I don't want to start anything, Dorcas," Sirius said. "Call him whatever you like."

James' jaw dropped and he looked at Sirius, shocked. "What?"

"Limp-wristed, disease-carrying fudge packer," Dorcas said experimentally. She didn't think any of these things about Remus, but Sirius' behaviour was worth looking into. "Pillow-biting, perverted abomination. Sexual predator. _Freak_."

"Okay, hey now," Aidan interrupted, glaring at Dorcas. He didn't care how off Sirius was acting, or what reasons he might have for it. He didn't want to hear stuff like that, especially not from Dorcas. Not like she had any right to criticize someone else on their bedroom activities. Ed had called him in tears when they'd split for that week, and even if they were back together, she was in no position to throw stones. "Not in my kitchen, thanks."

Sirius rubbed the bridge of his nose and asked, "What exactly are you trying to do, Dorcas?"

"Me? What the fuck are _you_ doing?" she snapped back, feeling defensive.

It wasn't like Sirius to be serious with anyone without injecting some sort of joke into the conversation, Dorcas especially. Dorcas, he'd always thought, was tough. Dorcas, he'd always thought, could handle it. What she'd done to Edgar had proved to Sirius that'd he'd overestimated what she was really capable of at seventeen. Now, with her staring him down, Sirius could choose to be either rational and frank about how he was acting, lie through his teeth, or ignore her. The last two options, he decided, weren't fair to anyone.

"Honestly, Dorcas?" Sirius said quietly, running a hand through his hair. "I just don't know what to say to you anymore."

The words stung more than they probably ought to, and Dorcas, for the first time in her life, actively wished she _didn't_ have an audience. She knew Sirius and Remus knew what had happened, because Ed had stayed with them, but she didn't know who else knew. Maybe everyone did. It didn't matter, really, because whether they did or didn't, she still didn't know how to respond.

Smiling in a way that made her look hunted, Dorcas said, "You tell me to fuck off and stop being a fucking cunt, that's what you tell me. You don't just lie down and take it. I don't care what your reasons are. In fact, you should be putting up with even _less_ shit from me now than before."

"Er, why?" James asked, looking from Dorcas to Edgar to Sirius. Cracking a totally inappropriate smile, James joked, "Awkward morning after, kids?"

For the first time in his entire life, Sirius said, "Not the time, James."

"Maybe this isn't the best time for this," Edgar said, quietly. "It's not necessary, for one thing, and it's only causing bad feelings, for another, and maybe it's best if we just... talk about something else."

Dorcas knew it wouldn't be easy, but she hadn't really expected the self-loathing. It definitely wasn't something she was familiar with. Getting up and heading out of the room, she muttered, "I have to piss."

James' eyebrows disappeared beneath his messy fringe as he watched Dorcas leave, and he made a quick decision. He grabbed the book, flipped until he found an interesting picture (the aforementioned photo of Aidan in boxers and cowboy boots, carrying the rest of his clothes as he ran from a house James knew to belong to a bloke a few years older than them, who'd invited them to a party).

"This one has a great story. Doesn't it, Lynch?" James asked brightly. Right below it on the page was a photo of James himself being dragged from the same house by the death grip Lucy Welsh, a beautiful blond a few years older than all of them, had on his ear. She was clutching a sheet to herself to cover the important bits, and James thought the two photos along side each other mislead any uninvolved party until they heard the explanation. "Oh, and I'm not a peeping tom or anything."

"Yeah! Yes, it does. Have a story," Aidan said, latching onto the distraction with a sort of desperation. Until he remembered what the story was. "But actually, it's not that good. Let's find a different photo to explain, shall we?"

Edgar watched Dorcas go, but couldn't bring himself to sympathize with her for coming to terms with the fall out of what she'd done. Before, he would've gone after her, but now he couldn't. She'd made the mistake, and he'd forgiven her, but his friends-- _their_ friends, even--were a different story. Between Aidan's supportive nod and Sirius' comments, well. He'd been close with Sirius and Aidan for as long as he could remember, and it felt good, in a way, to be reminded of what it was like in the days when they always had one another's backs, even when something colossally stupid was involved.

"Oh, no," Hestia said, grinning. "I want to hear this one, I don't care how embarrassing it is, Aidan. Ooh, it is embarrassing, isn't it?"

"Oh, it is," James said, leaning forward and grinning. "This was right before Pads and I left for East Portlemouth. Like, the week before. And Lynch here was such a blushing virgin, that we figured he ought to have our help getting laid before we left. Course, mostly we just wanted to see him make a fool of himself at the expense of some bird, and we figured if anyone was out of his league, Lucy Welsh was. Lynch did end up surprising us, though. We made the best of it, of course. Hence the pictures..."

***

"You're a cruel man, Edgar Bones," Sirius said, shaking his head, although he was smiling. "Your _best friend_ , mate. Isn't that a little sadistic?"

"Well maybe," Edgar answered, watching Lucy Welsh dance with her friends in the centre of the living room. A bloke a few years up from them was throwing a party, and had invited them, and while Edgar, Sirius, James and Davy were there with a few beers in them already, Aidan had yet to show up, but he would. "Worse case scenario, he makes an arse of himself. Best case scenario, he 'becomes a man' or whatever the fuck. It's win-win for us, really."

James looped an arm around both Sirius and Ed's neck, beer in hand on Sirius' side, and said, "Our target has arrived. He just came in the front door. Gudgeon is giving him a pep talk and he's looking like he's figured out something is up and wants to run for the hills." James manhandled his two friends, turning them to face where Aidan and Davy were just entering the room. "Oh. Also, I ran into Lucy by the stereo a song or two ago. Talked Lynch up and promised to introduce them. She seemed... patient but uninterested. Should be interesting."

"He's going to make a complete and absolute arse of himself, is what," Edgar said. "I think it'll entertain us quite a bit. Christ, he looks like a deer caught in headlights. What on earth is Gudgeon saying to him?"

"He's probably telling him, 'Lucy Welsh wants to meet you'," Sirius mused. "You of all people, Bonesie, should know that Aidan frightens like a little girl."

Davy knew better than to let Aidan get a chance to back out the door. What a wimp. Dragging him over to where the others were standing and watching, all with wide grins, Davy chuckled and said, "Look how happy they are to see you. You can't _leave_."

"You did something. What did you do?" Aidan asked suspiciously. "I know you lot. You totally... cor, she's a looker. I forgot how hot Lucy Welsh was. How did I forget that?"

"I dunno mate, but she was talking about you earlier," Sirius lied, branching out on what James had said. "Jamie's going to introduce you."

"She..." Aidan tore his eyes away from pretty Lucy Welsh and glared at his friends. "She was not. This is what you have planned, don't you? Humiliation at the hands of Lucy Welsh? You're terrible friends, and she is way too pretty for me to ever talk to."

"Calm down, mate," James said with a smile. "We'll just walk by, all casual like, and say 'hey, Lucy, this is my mate Aidan. He's the one with the horses if you ever want to go riding' and she'll say 'pleasure to meet you' and we'll walk away. Simple. Just a first contact. I promise."

"Would Potter lie to you, huh? He's the good one, you know that," Davy said, grinning. "We're just trying to help you get a leg up."

"We're far from horrible," Edgar said, trying not to laugh. "We only have your best interests at heart, Lynch."

"Exactly!" Sirius agreed. "And it'll only be humiliating if you humiliate yourself. So there's that hope to hold on to!"

"I don't know..." Aidan started, staring after Lucy like a lovesick puppy. She was beautiful and older and he had no shot, but there wasn't any harm in just saying hi, was there?

James extricated himself from Sirius and Bones, and looped an arm around Aidan instead, figuring 'I don't know' was as close to a yes as they were going to get. He approached Lucy with a grin and as soon as they were close enough, said, "Hey, Lucy? This is my mate Aidan, the one I told you about. He seriously wants in your knickers, but he's too big of a virgin to come say hello, so I thought I'd assist. You two have a good chat now!"

Aidan, gaping, watched James dash off, and then looked up at Lucy desperately. "I don't! I mean. Christ, you're gorgeous, but I don't, I don't think about your knickers. I know you're totally out of my league, my friends are just... sorry about them. They're... I'm sorry. I respect you as a person. A very, very pretty... person. Oh Christ. I'm going to kill them. Sorry."

Lucy couldn't help but smile and quirk an eyebrow as her friends giggled around her. She brushed them off, eyeing Aidan up and down. He was a cute sort, she supposed, and blushing in an absolutely adorable way. As her friends bustled off, Lucy said, "What was it? Aidan?"

"Y-yeah," he said, staring at her with wide-eyed wonder. "Look, honest, I'm really sorry about them. Their mothers never taught them how they ought to talk to women, I guess. You can, uh, slap me, if you want. Not that I'm into that."

Lucy laughed. He really _was_ cute. "Is that how you ought to talk to a woman, then, Aidan? Offering to let her slap you?"

"Well, no, I suppose not," Aidan said, blushing now that the panic had worn off and he could hear his friends snickering behind him. "I just get nervous around girls. Especially ones as pretty as you."

"Oh, I see," Lucy said, her smile getting wider. Sure, she could have anyone she pleased, and they'd all tell her they thought she was pretty and wonderful and all that rot just to get into her knickers, but Aidan was so sincere, and honest, and _virginal_... Was there really that much harm in robbing the cradle? She was sure it'd make his day, vain as it sounded. "So flattery is the way to go then?"

"Go with... with the talking to women thing?" Aidan asked, unsure. He smiled then, hoping he looked charming, and tried not to get distracted by her lips. She looked so gorgeous when she smiled. He cleared his throat and said in a slightly lower voice than before, "Well, I know one thing, and that's that it isn't polite to lie. So if I say something flattering, I guess it must mean it's true."

"Aren't you a charmer," Lucy mused. She leaned in close to him, licking her lips and batting her eyelashes and whispered, "Tell me, Aidan. Are you really a virgin?"

Aidan couldn't blush much more than he already was, and he looked down to his feet for a moment before sneaking a look up at her. "Yes. I told you I don't lie. I mean, but I don't, uh, just, don't mind what James said, if you don't want. He's a bit of a prat."

Lucy laughed softly. "You're adorable, did you know?" she told him. "And if you _really_ want in my knickers, Aidan, whether you're a gentleman or not..." she leaned in and sucked on his earlobe before finishing: "I'd be happy to find a room."

Aidan froze for a moment, eyes half closed and mouth half open. Then he heard one of his friends--did it really matter which?--call from behind him, "Well bugger me! The fucker did something _right_!"

Blinking out of his pleasure induced stupor, Aidan looked up at Lucy in awe. "Are you... really? Really? Because I mean. You're Lucy Welsh. Every guy in this room would... _Me_ , really?"

" _You_ , really," Lucy said, smiling warmly. "Unless you don't want to...?"

"No, I do!" Aidan said quickly. "I really, really do. Um. Room, where?"

Lucy laughed and looped her arm in his, leading him toward the hallway. "Oh, how cute!" she exclaimed as they turned out of sight. "You're wearing cowboy boots!"

"Well bugger me sideways," Edgar said, staring after Aidan and Lucy in awe.

"She went for it," James deadpanned. "She... Aidan's going to lay Lucy Welsh!"

"Lucky bastard," Davy moaned. "Fuck, do I ever wish I was him right now."

"Son of a bitch," Sirius chimed in. "How the fuck did he do that?"

"I... don't know," Edgar said. "He must have some sort of, fuck, I don't know, magnetism that we don't know anything about. Do girls find farm boys charming?"

"Apparently," Sirius said glumly.

"Think I could pull off a pair of cowboy boots?" Davy asked, looking down at his grungy sneakers. "You know what, no. That's where this line of thought stops. You losers can hang around here and wish you were him. I'm going to go talk to Jenna and Tamara."

"Uh, Gudgeon, _you_ were the one who said you wanted to be him," James pointed out.

"Hey, fuck you," Davy said in response, heading towards the girls.

"Okay, so, we're not just leaving this as is, right?" James asked Sirius and Edgar. "We've got to get something fun out of this. Lynch is getting laid, for fuck's sake."

"All is not right with the world," Sirius mused.

"Well. We could still embarrass the shit out of him," Edgar said, looking at James with a grin. "I know you said you were done playing look-out, Potter, but think you could reprise your role for one night?"

"Why, what have you got in mind?" James asked, grinning slyly. "I might consider it if it's good enough."

"We can't be totally cruel. He's in there, so we've got to leave him alone for a bit," Edgar said. "But we bide our time, then you run in screaming 'Parents!' or 'Bobbies!' or something, and Lynch'll take off with his tail between his legs."

Sirius shook his head, laughing. "Fuck, Bones, when did you get devious?"

James cackled. "I love it! But... why does it have to be me?"

"Because you've always been the lookout," Edgar said practically.

"Yeah," Sirius agreed. "If Ed or I went in there, Lynch wouldn't believe one word that came out of our mouths."

"Bugger," James sighed, accepting his fate. "He's going to flatten me when he finds out. But hey, on the bright side, I might get an eyeful of Lucy Welsh in the all together!"

"Exactly!" Edgar said. "I give him an hour, tops, to enjoy himself or what have you."

Sirius snorted. "You've got a lot of faith in his stamina then."

"Oh, come on. We can't wait that long," James complained. "They'll be dressed and back out here by then. Lynch'll last like, four minutes, tops."

Edgar rolled his eyes. "Fine. 15 minutes. How's that?"

"I can barely wait. Hey, you two got a camera? We've got to catch some proof," James said, hopping on board with the idea, even if it was likely he'd take the fall for it. "I bet you he'll just book it out the back patio without even coming back down here."

Sirius pulled a camera out of the big pocket on his shorts and said, "We'll go wait out back. Whenever you're ready, Jamie."

***

James, who was laughing so hard his eyes were watering, managed to choke out between great guffaws, "Oh, you should've seen his expression when I busted in. He was looking all happy and amazed, and he just, oh hell, he turned white and dove over her for his clothes. Our Aidan the gentleman practically tackled her in his attempt to give her a goodbye kiss before tearing out the door."

"Least I didn't stand there like an idiot, gawking at her," Aidan mumbled, flushed red to his ears.

"So let me get this straight," Hestia said, grinning widely. "You lost your virginity to _Lucy Welsh_? Really?"

"Er, yeah," Aidan said, and then raised his eyebrows. "Why?"

"I met her! Like, a month ago!" Hestia said. "I was out to lunch with Fabian and we ran into her and chatted a bit. She went to school with Fabian."

"Oh," Aidan said, feeling a bit weird about his girlfriend meeting the girl he lost it to when he was fifteen. "How is she?"

"Still gorgeous?" James asked with a grin. "Not as gorgeous as Lily, of course, but she was pretty high up there in the 'runners up' category."

"Well, she's Lucy French now, and she was seven months pregnant at the time, but yes, I thought she looked gorgeous," Hestia said. She gave Aidan a kiss on the cheek before saying, "You really shouldn't feel awkward, you know. It's no different than you and Sirius sitting in a room together."

"What?" Sirius asked. "Why?"

Aidan thought about Hestia's comment, and then turned to look at Sirius, aghast. "Mate!"

"Oh, this is rich," James snickered, enjoying looking between Sirius and Aidan. "You didn't know they slept... Hang on, what? You gave it up for Sirius, Hes?"

Hestia shrugged. "Maybe."

"You didn't tell me that!" Sirius said. "You didn't! Your exact words at the time were, 'Sirius, it's okay, I've done this before'. That gave me the impression that _you'd done it before_."

Hestia smiled slightly. "Well, at the time I wanted you to do it, so I'd have said just about anything, don't you think?"

"Cor, so you weren't just the total prick who cheated on her and broke her heart, you the total prick who took her virginity, then cheated on her and broke her heart," James said, whistling. "Good thing she's such a good sport, else you'd be bollocks-less about now."

Aidan scowled at Sirius, but said nothing. It was years ago, and if Hestia was okay with it, he didn't have any place bawling out his best mate for it.

Sirius crossed his arms and sunk lower in his chair frowning. "There was other stuff. Big mess. Sorry, Hes."

"Hey, there's no sense in apologizing for it _now_ ," Hestia said practically. "We've put it behind us, right? You started shagging blokes, I made a drunk arse of myself, and here we are."

"I thought the drunk-arse bit was over Kingsley?" James asked, raising his eyebrows.

"Does it matter?" Aidan interjected. "I'm her boyfriend now anyway. I'm the only present tense man in her life."

"Exactly," Hestia said quietly, looking at her hands. "It doesn't matter."

"Right," Edgar said, before an awkward silence could settle on them. "Perhaps we should go get the rest of that furniture?"

"Oh, but it's _heavy_ ," James complained with a groan, downing the last of his cool, fruity drink. "Well, we've done the biggest, right? There's a loveseat and the telly stand and some other bits. Easy as pie."

"You're not getting out of it anyway, no use giving yourself a pep talk," Aidan said with a grin, nudging for Hestia to get off of him so he could get up. "And I'll take the bottom of the heavy stuff this time, you whiners."

"Mouthy-arse farm boy," Sirius said, getting to his feet. "We haven't all spent our lives lifting cows for weights, or whatever it is you do."

Hestia watched the boys head back downstairs, bickering amongst each other, before heading into the bathroom after Dorcas. She'd been in there for a long time, and Hestia wasn't sure what had happened. She knew that Dorcas and Edgar were having some problems, but that was all Aidan would say, and at the very least Hestia figured that Dorcas could use a friend to talk to. They didn't know each other very well, but they had to start somewhere.

"Dorcas?" Hestia asked, knocking on the door. "Are you all right?"

Dorcas had just been sitting in the bathroom trying to work up the nerve to go out and face the others again. She figured she was almost there when Hestia knocked on the door. Jumping a little, Dorcas didn't move from her position laying in the bathtub as she called, "It's open."

Hestia opened the door and stepped in quietly. "The boys went down to get the rest of the furniture," she said, sitting on the toilet.

"Okay," Dorcas replied, and then smiled wryly at Hestia. "I'm not used to no one coming after me. It was a bit of a fucking system shock, to be honest."

"I know the feeling," Hestia said. "Aidan didn't tell me what happened, or anything," she added. "Just that you and Edgar had had some sort of falling out."

"I cheated on him with my ex-girlfriend," Dorcas said bluntly, vaguely curious to find out if she'd feel better or worse after saying it out loud. She couldn't quite tell, though. She just still felt sick over it.

"Ah," Hestia said. She hadn't quite figured on it being that serious. "Something else I can sympathize with. You... you knew about the whole Gideon thing, right?"

"Yeah," Dorcas said, then offered Hestia a rueful smile. "Guess we're both sluts then, huh?"

Hestia laughed. "I suppose we are. I think Aidan might know. He gives me these looks sometimes... And I thought I might get away with never having to face it again, but things always comes back around to kick you in the teeth, apparently. I imagine Edgar didn't take you cheating on him very well?"

"Neither did I, to be honest," Dorcas said, not really surprised at how candidly she was speaking with Hestia. Dorcas had never really been a private person. "He's forgiven me, and we're working on making things better, but I'm having a fucking time forgiving myself, if you know what I mean. What kind of person does that, you know? What kind of fucking monster do I have to be to hurt him like that?"

Shaking her head, Hestia said, "You're far from a monster, Dorcas. I mean, hell, look at what you're handling! A baby, and school and not living with your parents anymore... Ask Lily or Alice, I did _not_ fair that well when I found out I was... Oh. Well." Hestia never talked about it. It was just another thing she'd squashed down and tried to pretend never happened. "I, uh. I was pregnant. When I was sixteen."

"I didn't know that," Dorcas said, turning her head to face Hestia. "Did you get rid of it, then? I almost did. I made an appointment and my mother dropped me off at the fucking clinic and everything. I fucking wigged, though, and backed out. They called Ed because I was such a mess."

"I lost it," Hestia explained. "I found out that I was pregnant, and that Sirius was cheating on me, all in the same day. I didn't react well to either bit of news. But I decided that I wanted to keep it, and that I had to tell him, and I fell down the stairs at school and broke my leg on top of it. I haven't told Sirius."

"Well fuck," Dorcas swore. "Why the fuck would you put yourself through that by yourself? I hope you told _someone_."

"Alice, Emmeline and Lily," Hestia said. "They told me to tell him, but I mean, Sirius is the sort of person, or at least he _was_ the sort of person, who didn't take responsibility with much weight. I mean, it would've been different if I'd told him I was actually pregnant, but if I said I'd _been_ pregnant he wouldn't say, 'Are you all right?' he'd say, 'Well thank God for small miracles', you know?"

"I wonder what Ed would've done if I'd gotten rid of the baby," Dorcas said softly, though she'd been trying not to think about it. She couldn't imagine having gone through with it, but if she had... she thought Ed probably would have still come to help her. He was just that sort of guy, and she didn't deserve him.

"I don't know," Hestia said. "I don't know Edgar very well, but he seems like the sort of person that would stick with you anyway. Does he get very angry?"

"Not usually. He's pretty much amazing," Dorcas said with a soft smile. "I'm lucky as fuck, I know that."

"Yeah. Aidan's like that. He makes me feel like the most important person in his life, and there's always this guilt floating around in my brain..." Hestia said. "I think it'll probably be a long time before I forgive myself for lying to him. He deserves better."

"I know the feeling," Dorcas said softly. "Fuck, do I ever fucking know the feeling."

"Anyhow. We should stop sitting here feeling sorry for ourselves," Hestia said. "The kitchen won't unpack itself, unfortunately, and it's the least we can do with the boys lugging all of that furniture up four flights of stairs."

"I don't feel sorry for myself," Dorcas replied, though she started to hoist herself out of the tub. "It's my own fucking fault, anyway. No point feeling sorry for myself. Now how many fucking boxes are there?"

"I think there's five left," Hestia said, heading into the hallway. "Mostly dishes and stuff, I think. Aidan and I can unpack the stuff for the bedroom and living room later." The loveseat had appeared in the living room next to the armoire they'd left when they'd sat down to drinks. The boys had obviously gone back down, and Hestia could hear Edgar and Aidan through the open door.

"It was really nice of you two to give us that," Hestia said, pointing at the wardrobe. "There's no closet in the bedroom."

"Yeah, it's a hobby Ed started a few years ago, I guess," Dorcas said, smiling proudly. "He made all the baby furniture too. A crib and a rocking chair and a change table and everything. He's really good with his hands." Dorcas couldn't help but waggle her eyebrows suggestively as she said that last bit.

"He made it?" Hestia asked incredulously as Edgar and Aidan came through the door with the telly stand. "Edgar, you made that armoire?"

"Yeah, why?" Edgar asked.

"That's _amazing_!" Hestia exclaimed. "It's beautiful, I mean, goodness. I thought it was something from a store!"

Ed smiled. "Thanks."

"It really is, mate," Aidan said. "Ever thought about selling your stuff? Custom furniture fetches a pretty penny from the rich and illustrious."

"Like my parents," Dor said, smirking. "You remember the liquor cabinet? Cost them over two thousand quid for that fucker."

"You really think people'd pay for stuff that I've made?" Edgar asked. He'd never really considered it before; he'd been woodworking for years, but thought of it as a hobby, really, not as a career.

"You heard Dorcas," Aidan said, shrugging. "Your stuff is great, and people do pay to have things exactly how they want. I think people would snap it up."

"Oh," Edgar said quietly, just as a light bulb seemed to go off in his brain. Since graduating high school he'd been trying to figure out what he wanted to do for the rest of his life, what sort of career he wanted to have, and there it was. It had been sitting in front of him the entire time. "I... I'd never really considered that. Do they have carpentry programs, then? Like in colleges?"

"There's one here, or at least I suppose there is," Hestia said. "Aidan showed me around his campus and we saw this workshop-type thing."

"Yeah, actually, there is," Aidan said. "And from what I've heard, it's not a bad program. You spend some time in school and some time on the job. You should look into it."

"Yeah. Yeah, I think I should," Edgar said thoughtfully.

"Oi, slackers! Little help?" James shouted from the hallway. He had boxes piled so high he couldn't see over them, let alone open the door. "Where the fuck did you two get so much stuff? It's ridiculous. The flat isn't even big enough for all of it."

"Prongs? Where are you?" Sirius asked, trying to see past his own pile of boxes as he came off the stairs. "I can't see dick all."

Before James could respond, however, Sirius walked straight into him, pushing him, and causing his boxes, James, and James' boxes to shake, lose balance, and fall in through the doorway.

James moaned in pain as he was crushed by boxes and Sirius. "I hate you. I think I'm bleeding. There's something sharp in this box. Ow. Bugger fuck."

Aidan winced at the mess, and the sound of all of his and Hestia's belongings crashing down to the ground. Walking over to make sure James and Sirius were okay, he rolled his eyes. "You've fallen on Hestia's hair dryer. And you're not bleeding, so far as I can see. Are you okay?"

"Nargh," James said unintelligibly, pushing one box marked 'clothes' off of his shoulder. "No. You're lucky this was the last of the boxes, or else I would've refused to help bring the rest of it up."

Sirius climbed out from under a box marked 'movies' and pointed up at it, saying, "That? That was _heavy_. On my _head_. And don't blame this on me, James! If you'd have answered me, I wouldn't be beaten and bruised from..." he groped wildly, reaching into a box that had come open, pulling up one of Hestia's bras. "Lingerie?"

"Hey, now, put that down!" Hestia called, grinning. "I'm afraid that's property of Aidan and my tits only, thank you very much."

"Shouldn't have made us lug it up then, should you have," James grumbled. "Sirius, get off. You're crushing my legs."

***

"Aidan. Aidan. _Aidan_ ," Hestia called, sitting on the couch and watching Aidan unpack boxes. "Take a break. _Please_?"

"I just want to get it done so we can enjoy our new place," Aidan said, looking at her with puppy eyes. She was unyielding, though, and so he nudged a box out of the way and sat down on the couch next to her, reaching to tuck a flyaway strand of hair behind her ear. "I guess we can enjoy it a little before we finish unpacking."

"We don't have to unpack to enjoy it," she said, scooching over and depositing herself in his lap.

"Can you believe it's really ours? Both our names are on the lease," Aidan said with a grin, wrapping his arms around her waist. "It's _ours_ , Hestia."

"It is. It's amazing! And I'm so excited for this, Aidan," Hestia said, biting her lip. "Going to bed with you every night, waking up with you every morning, bickering over chores..."

Aidan laughed and beamed up at her. "We live together," he said with a smile. "Before we stop for the night, there's one more box I need you to unpack. Last one, I promise."

Hestia rolled her eyes. "You're ridiculous. Here I am, sitting in your lap and practically throwing myself at you, and you want to unpack a box. Fine, then. Any old box, Aidan, or did you have one in mind?"

"A particular one," Aidan said, smiling as he lifted her off of him and went to find the box he knew Hestia's jewelry box was in. It was middle in a stack of three, and he lifted the top one off before carrying it to the coffee table, setting it down in front of Hestia. "That one. And then you can throw yourself at me all you like, if I haven't ruined the mood."

Hestia cocked her head. "Why this one?" she asked, peeling the tape off of the top. "And you haven't killed the mood yet, for the record. Although if paper snakes hop out at me when I open this box, I'm not going to be impressed."

"No paper snakes. There is a surprise, though," Aidan admitted, starting to feel nervous. He rubbed his sweaty palms on his trousers as she started to lift things out of the box. He'd tied a ribbon to the clasp on her jewelry box, in the hopes that she'd get the hint that's where she ought to look.

The jewelry box was near the bottom, and as she pulled it out, looked at the ribbon on the clasp, and then at Aidan, smiled, and quirked an eyebrow. "Is this what I'm opening then?" she asked.

He just smiled and nodded, heart beating in his throat. Christ, he hoped it wasn't too soon. He hoped she didn't say no.

Hestia pulled the ribbon off and looked at him as she opened the top. "If you've gotten me that money-sign necklace from the dispenser in front of the liquor store, then I'm going to shag you senseless," she teased. Turning her attention back to the jewelry box, her breath caught in her throat when she noticed a ring box sitting right in the middle of the rest of her things. Swallowing hard she set the jewelry box on the table and took the ring box out. Looking between it, and Aidan, she opened it.

Aidan knew he should say something. He ought to do this properly, traditionally. He knew that. But he was _so nervous_.

"It's... I thought..." Aidan trailed off. He'd planned out what to say, sort of, but he knew he should've written it down. "I love you. And Christ, I'm so bloody scared right now. I just... I thought... Well, call me old-fashioned, but I think love--you know, real, unconditional, forever love--is a once in a lifetime thing. So since I love you in a real, unconditional, forever way, I figured I'd ask. And hope. And... will you?"

"Oh, _Aidan_ ," Hestia breathed, staring down at the ring. She hadn't expected this, especially not this soon, but _God_... There was no one else but him for her, she knew that. Her breath hitched and she realized she was starting to cry, and why in God's name was he the only person in the world who could make her cry? "Yes," she managed, throwing herself into his arms and wrapping her own tightly around his neck. "Yes, yes, yes, yes, _yes_ , a _million_ times yes!"

Aidan laughed and returned the embrace enthusiastically, pressing a sloppy kiss to the side of her head. "Well put it on, then!"

Sitting back Hestia pulled the ring out of the box and slid it onto her finger. It was a simple, silver band with a little diamond; nothing flashy, which Hestia liked. She was crying full stop now, and wiping at her eyes with the palms of her hands, she said, "Ugh, why are you the only person on planet Earth who can make me cry like a baby?"

"Must be that real, unconditional, forever kind of love," Aidan whispered and then took her hand in his, admiring the way the ring looked on her hand, before kissing her. As soon as he pulled away, a little damp in the eyes himself, he laughed. "Christ. Engaged. We live together and we're engaged."

"That means we're going to get _married_ ," Hestia said, leaning into him and burying her face in his neck. "God, I love you."

"Love you too, Hes," he said softly, tightening his grip around her. He really did, no matter how their relationship had started. He loved her, and he knew she loved him too, and that was all that mattered. "Come on, let's go celebrate. Uh, in the bedroom. You know."

"You are so _cute_ , Aidan," Hestia said, grinning at him. "You're twenty and you blush over sex."

"Hey, no teasing your new fiancé," he said, and then got to his feet, crouching to scoop her into his arms and carry her, princess style, to the bedroom. It would've been a lot more suave had he not caught his leg on a box and nearly bailed, only just managing to prevent them both from crashing to the carpet. He smiled sheepishly at her as he righted them and continued to the bedroom. "Sorry. I'll practice before our wedding night, I promise."


	25. Closer to the Heart (June 30th - July 4th, 2007)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Where Fabian and Caradoc are masturbateable, Jon Stewart (ahahaha) makes a cameo, and there is a variety of making-out.

**DETAIL ORIENTED** \- _JUNE 30TH, 2007_ \- Issue 34, Volume 2

**Sex May Not Equal Power, But It Sure Loosens Lips--And Not Just Mine!**   
_Sexual satisfaction and social activism revisited_

By Rita Skeeter | Editor

Do any of you remember Issue 31 from the end of March when I said I was going to find out about Salcombe's favourite illegal activism group? Do you?

Well, after finding out all sorts of boring things (like that underpaid and mistreated Vol de Mort factory workers were too scared to strike on their own without Order assistance to take the fall), I finally found something juicy for you. And no, I'm not talking about the dramatic protest by Fabian Prewett and Caradoc Dearborn. Though, if you didn't catch it, you missed out. Apparently the new line by VDM, _Faggot_ (a line of clothes made specifically for gay men and meterosexuals), didn't sit well with them, and the two, dressed very stylishly indeed, handcuffed themselves to the doors of the VDM shop on opening day and made out for six hours straight, before police cut the cuffs and escorted them from the premises. Kudos, you little flamers! Perhaps they only delayed the opening six hours, but the power of their message has the internet hailing them as "gay icons of the time" and "pretty enough to masturbate to six times in one day".

But no, I'm not referring to that. The fuckers have gone and pissed _someone_ off, that's for sure. Gideon Prewett (congratulations are in order, by the way, since the twat just got himself hitched to childhood sweetheart Marlene McKinnon!) alone has brought in his van four times in the last month and a half for broken windows, and twice the tires had been slashed as well. Now _that_ is one expensive grudge. And I worked hard for this information and have no qualms sharing it with the lot of you. If I'm going to fuck greasy mechanics, I’m at least going to get something out of it besides a free brake job on my Impala.

Now I ask you, readers, who has Gideon Prewett pissed off that doesn't care one lick about screwing people out of their money? To find out the answer to that, just go to any Vol de Mort store and put on some ugly, over-priced slut-wear while anorexic employees ignore you and file their nails as they try to decide what flavour of cooking spray they'll have a spritz of for lunch.

In case you didn't catch that, let me speak plainly. Tom Marvolo Riddle. Yes, folks. T.M. himself, head of Vol de Mort Fashions.

Now before I get overpaid lawyers sent to my doorstep, let me clarify. I'm not suggesting old Tommy boy was here in Salcombe with a crow bar and a hunting knife. But I _did_ see a certain employee of his, Rabastan Lestrange, out and about last weekend, coincidentally, the day before Prewett's most recent trip to the shop.

Lucky for you, I am a fearless reporter type, and I unbuttoned the top two--okay three--buttons on my shirt, put on a fresh layer of lip gloss, and headed for the target. Now I'm not one to bounce my own boobs, but I am a fantastic actress and I played to perfection the part of the simpering fashionista wannabe. After an illuminating evening at his hotel, Lestrange himself admitted that he was "dangerous". After pressing the issue, I was shocked to be told that, "I shatter lots of things, expectations included."

If this isn't an admission of guilt, than fuck me sideways. Just because the police don't agree doesn't make me wrong. I believe in forming my own opinions. And so, as usual, I encourage you, dear readers, to keep your ears up and your eyes open.

This is the mouth with the message, signing out.

***

Fabian was looking around the set with awe. Amazing. He couldn't believe their little stint out front of the Vol de Mort store had made it all the way to the United States, let alone piqued Jon Stewart's interest, of all people, to the point of paying for them to fly in to film a gag spot for his show. Or, not that Jon Stewart had called them personally, but Jon Stewart's people pretty much counted as Jon Stewart, Fabian thought.

Though he'd had the whole plane ride there to get used to the idea, and their first night in LA, Fabian was still incredibly excited. Bouncing on the balls of his feet, Fabian shot Caradoc an excited look. "The Daily Show! Caradoc! Why aren't you as completely giddy as I am?"

Caradoc was frightened to death, actually. His father had left a rather loud and uncreative message on Caradoc's answering machine after the incident, and despite wondering how the hell his father had gotten his phone number, Caradoc couldn't help but wonder what would be waiting for him when he got back from America after re-enacting the incident with Fabian on international television. He shrugged and grinned nervously; he _was_ excited, just _mostly_ petrified. "It's a little intimidating, isn't it?"

Taking one look at Caradoc, Fabian instantly felt terrible. He'd been so excited about it all he hadn't even thought that Caradoc might have some reservations. Moving swiftly, he put his hands on Caradoc's hips, smiling at his boyfriend. "All right, Cara?"

"I'm fine, really," Caradoc said. "Just... you know. It's a bit much, you know?"

"Well, yeah. That's the point," Fabian said gently, hoping he wasn't going to freak Caradoc out more. They couldn't really back down now. The studio audience was just starting to file in, and filming would start probably within the next twenty minutes. "It's everywhere. Just, today isn't that big of a deal, right? We're all over the internet already. This will just be a couple thousand more privy to what hundreds of thousands have already downloaded. It's sort of grand scale, and maybe we didn't expect it, but not doing this isn't going to change it."

"I know. And I want to do it," Caradoc said. "I mean, I wouldn't have come if I didn't think it was an amazing opportunity."

Suddenly a small group of girls started screaming, and then quickly started giggling instead when the reason for their shrieking gave them a funny look. Jon Stewart had come onto the set, and he was headed right for Fay and Cara.

"Hi there, boys. How you doing?" Jon asked evenly, a friendly smile on his face. "Got your lips all lubed up and ready to go?"

Fabian grinned widely. "Yes, sir. And thanks for inviting us. This is totally brill."

"Yes, thanks very much," Caradoc said, smiling. "Can't say we ever expected this."

"No problem, no problem. Just doing my part to wake up America. Glad you came to help," Jon said with a smile. "So I'm sure one of the PAs told you, but you're to start making out before we even start filming, and don't stop. We'll be cutting back to you... pretty much whenever I feel like it."

"Well, you know. What's an hour. We did six last time," Fabian said brightly, winking at Caradoc impishly. "It's one of our many special talents."

"Well we couldn't very well walk out there with no stamina," Caradoc said, grinning at Fabian. "The message wouldn't have been half so profound."

Jon rolled his eye and clapped a hand to each Fabian and Caradoc's shoulder. "You are noble, noble men. Far nobler than I. Stephen Colbert once suggested we make out for the good of the nation, and I just couldn't quite bring myself to do it..."

***

"Sounds like you had a good time then," Gideon said into the receiver, grinning despite himself and the moping he'd been doing until Marlene had clocked him 'round the head and told him to be happy for Fabian instead of jealous. "When are you heading back?"

"We're on the red eye out of here late tomorrow night, so we have the day to go shopping or what have you," Fabian said, rolling onto his stomach and smiling at Caradoc, who was next to him on the bed, in a signal that he was almost done. "You're picking us up at London Gatwick at six, aren't you? Our flight gets in at about half of, so we should be out shortly after."

"Yeah, Marlene has it written down somewhere for me," Gideon said. "I'll let you get to your shopping then, little brother. Be safe."

"Thanks, Gid. Ta. See you in a few days," Fay quipped, hanging up and then rolling again to flop dramatically half on top of Caradoc. "We are now famous for making out all over the place. What a reputation. Do you think we could make a career out of it? Excluding porn?"

"I think our fifteen minutes are almost up, actually," Caradoc said, grinning, and tucked an arm around Fabian. "It was nice while it lasted though."

"Not many people can say they made out on The Daily Show," Fabian said in agreement. "Hey, so are you hungry? I saw a place called Tofu Sushi on our way back. I bet they're vegetarian."

"Maybe in a bit, but I'm not in any hurry," Caradoc answered. "But I could definitely go for some sushi."

"I have another question," Fabian started, voice faux casual. "Do you like it here? I know we've only been here like, a day, but. So far? That's not the real question. It's a preliminary question. Though now you'll probably guess what the real question is. Except don't ruin it, I want to ask."

"It's really hot, but quite nice," Caradoc said, smiling expectantly.

"Would you like to move here? With me?" Fabian asked, smiling. "Ever since Gid told me he and Marlene are moving here I've been thinking about it, but as much as I'd miss him, I wouldn't move without you. You're my man. Gideon's my brother, yeah, but you're my man."

"Well you're all there is for me in Salcombe, Fabian," Caradoc said, pulling him a little tighter to him. "You know I'd love to."

"Good. Because I like it here. It's so _not_ small town," Fabian said, snuggling close to Caradoc. "And with your promotion, and my pay raise, I think we'll have enough saved by the end of the year. Not that I've been budgeting. ...Okay, I have."

Caradoc laughed. "It'll be good for us to go out and try something new. Besides, I might be your man, but you wouldn't be quite the same without Gideon, now would you?"

"I wouldn't know," Fabian said. "I've never been without him. I couldn't even imagine it. If you hadn't wanted to come, though, I would've tried it, because I love you and I don't _want_ to be without you. Just so you know."

"You love me?" Caradoc asked.

Fabian smiled and pressed a kiss into the bit of Caradoc closest to his mouth. It happened to be where his neck met his shoulder. "Of course I do. You're my man."

"I love you, too, Fay," Caradoc said quietly.

"God, I've been trying to say that for _months_ ," Fabian said with a smile. "I can't believe we put it off for so long."

"It's been a weird couple of months," Caradoc said. "Year, even. Between the Order and work and spur of the moment elopements in Berlin... I dunno. I still haven't forgiven you for making me wear flowers in my hair. Those trannies wouldn't leave me alone."

"I wouldn't have let them have you," Fabian assured him. "Besides, you looked adorable. And like a total hippie. It was fabulous."

Caradoc laughed. "Fabian?" he said. "Thank you."

"For what? Making you look like a hippie?" Fabian asked, chuckling. "Any time, baby."

"No, you sod," Caradoc said. "For saving my life. For pulling me away from the life my father had forced me into, and giving me this one, with you."

"You don't have to thank me," Fabian said. "I'm just glad you're happy now. You deserve to be."

"Well thank you anyway," Caradoc said. "And how could I not be happy in LA, an internationally famous make-out star, and with you in my arms? Don't be ridiculous."

Fabian kissed him then, for a good long while, and then pulled away to say thoughtfully, "I think I'm going to make business cards that say that. 'Fabian Prewett, internationally famous make-out star'."

"Only if I get some too," Caradoc said. "It's certainly better than 'Caradoc Dearborn, grease-covered delivery manager at shit hole diner'."

"That's not you. That's your job," Fabian said, rolling his eyes. "You're an artist."

"Right, sorry," Caradoc said. "'Caradoc Dearborn, starving artist', then?"

"How about 'Caradoc Dearborn, artist of the starving and the make-out variety'?" Fay suggested idly.

"My two greatest talents," Caradoc mused. "Starving and making-out."

"Well, so long as you keep me around, you shall never starve for making-out. I promise."


	26. Hate & War (July 8th-14th, 2007)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Where a former deal comes back to haunt Lucius, Bellatrix shows selective mercy, and Sirius and Narcissa keep it in the family.

Lucius was starting to panic.

Narcissa was supposed to be back from London in time for dinner. Before five, she'd told him. Don't worry, she'd said. It was supposed to be one, last, quick morning shoot, then she'd be on her way, and wouldn't Lucy get the maid to bake something overflowing with chocolate? The untouched cake was sitting in the fridge, and Lucius was pacing the front room. It was one in the morning. She wasn't answering her handy. He'd left a ridiculous amount of messages on her voicemail.

There was no answer through the emergency lines at Vol de Mort that she'd given him either. The office was closed.

 _Jesus Christ_ , he didn't know what to do.

Narcissa hardly waited for the sleek, grey company car to come to a stop before she threw the door open and ran for the house, slamming the front door open, and running into the front room. Lucius was there, waiting and looking fretful, and she burst into tears and threw herself on him, hiding her face in his chest and shaking against him.

"Oh, Lucius," she breathed, wrapping her arms so tightly around him that it was almost painful.

Lucius' heart dislodged itself from his throat and started beating quickly as he hugged her close to him thankfully, and said, " _Jesus_ , where have you _been_?"

"With me," Bellatrix said, stepping into the house through the door Narcissa had left open, closing it behind her and putting a hand on her hip. "And you're lucky for that. Do you have any household staff I need to worry about before I speak freely?"

"Shut up, Bella," Narcissa said softly, not letting go of Lucius. "For one god forsaken minute so I can hug my husband in peace, shut up."

Lucius looked at Bellatrix with shock and confusion as she huffed, checked her watch, and then began rifling through her briefcase as if to distract herself and give Cissa her a "minute" exactly. What on earth was going on? Narcissa sobbed into his chest and Lucius rubbed her back soothingly for a few moments before saying, "There's no one here but us, Bellatrix. Everyone has long since gone to bed."

"Good," Bellatrix said, voice clipped, as she pulled a business card from her briefcase and then snapped it shut. "You will quit your job tomorrow morning. Call this number no later than nine o'clock. Welcome to Vol de Mort Fashions, Mr. Malfoy."

"What are you talking about?" Narcissa asked, disentangling herself from Lucius and whirling around, wet eyes fierce. One look at Lucius and another at Bellatrix was all it took for the pieces to click into place. "You idiot, what did you do?" she snapped at Lucius, wiping her eyes with both hands before planting them on her hips and facing Bellatrix. "He's not quitting. He loves teaching. I won't let you involve him. I'm already in enough trouble without..."

"Do not talk about things you don't understand, idiot child," Bellatrix interrupted, voice cold and sharp as broken glass. "Unless you'd prefer to return to that warehouse and not leave until the coroners carry you out in a body bag."

Narcissa's ashen face paled further and she leaned back against Lucius.

"What happened?" Lucius asked, his voice shaking, a million possible scenarios flashing through his brain. He tucked the business card into his shirt pocket without looking at it, resigned to his fate--he'd do anything to protect Narcissa. But at the very least he wanted to know what had forced him to hold up his end of the deal he and Bellatrix had made.

"He shot someone," Narcissa breathed before Bellatrix could reply. "Mr. Riddle. Right in front of me. His head splattered open all over the wall, it was..."

"You were being meddlesome. You were supposed to be halfway back to Salcombe by then," Bellatrix snapped. "If you learned to reign in your ridiculous ambition and just _do as you're told_ we would not be in this situation. Lucius' fate rests entirely on your shoulders, Narcissa, and I hope you know that."

"I just wanted to meet him!" Narcissa shouted, and then turned away from Bellatrix and buried her face in Lucius' chest once more. "I didn't know..."

Lucius closed his eyes and took a deep breath. "H-How," Lucius started, his voice cracking. "How is Narcissa still alive?"

"I am very good at what I do, Mr. Malfoy, and you'll do well to remember that in the future," Bellatrix replied. She'd ended up literally pulling Narcissa back from the edge as TM had tried to push her down three flights of stairs. He'd wanted to clean up the witness right away, and Bellatrix had no doubt she would be facing suspicion for many months to come because of her intervention.

"Thank you," Lucius said, understanding that Bellatrix likely had to pull every string available to her to get Narcissa out of there and back in his arms. He easily could've lost her to that mad, homicidal son-of-a-bitch, and now... well. Now he would pay Bellatrix back. He had no choice in the matter. "Narcissa is done, isn't she? With the modelling, I mean." 

"She has been removed from Vol de Mort employ," Bellatrix said. "If she wishes to continue with her career, that is up to her. I have no doubt she's earned enough publicity to do well on her own. I would reccommend she quit, however, as TM will never forget about her if her face is everywhere."

"Lucy, I'm tired. I want to go to bed, and I don't want to go alone," Narcissa said suddenly, looking up at Lucius through big eyes, jutting her lower lip out in an artistic pout.

"I will call you in the morning, Bellatrix," Lucius said tiredly. "Good night." 

Bellatrix simply nodded, curling her lip slightly at the way Lucius pandered to Narcissa. Though, as Bellatrix let herself out, it crossed her mind that she was hardly any different, pulling the girl back from the ledge and talking Tom into a trade, Narcissa's life for her husband to do with what he will. True, she hadn't had to accompany the shaken up girl all the way back to Salcombe, but she had. Something about Narcissa made people want to protect her, Bellatrix supposed. It was something she ought to simply accept.

Sighing with relief as Bellatrix left, Narcissa attempted to regain her composure slightly, running a hand up Lucius' chest and saying, "Carry me up to our bedroom and make love to me, Lucy? I don't want to think any more tonight. It's been a terrible, trying day." 

Lucius took a deep breath, stopping himself from lashing out at her, from making her realize exactly what she'd gotten him into. "Go see your son," he said. "I'll be up shortly."

She was about to argue that Draco was sleeping, but Narcissa found she actually quite liked the idea of sitting with her son for a little while, even if he wasn't awake. The day had certainly reminded her of her own mortality, and Lucius and Draco were the only two things that had been on her mind. Nearly being murdered certainly made her realize what was important to her, anyway, even if the world at large seemed to think her selfish and self-serving.

"Fine," Narcissa said, pulling away from him even though she loathed the idea of being without him at the moment. "I'll be upstairs then."

Once she had gone, Lucius sat himself down and put his head in his hands, rubbing his temples. Things had evened out for the two of them, with their family, and their marriage, and their lives together... and now their were no guarantees. If Riddle went under, Lucius would go to jail. If Narcissa said anything about what had happened, they'd all be killed.

After ten minutes of thinking and draining himself for a way out, Lucius gave up reluctantly and stood, sucking in a breath. He had to protect his family. He walked up the stairs slowly, and on the darkened landing watched the pale light flooding from the nursery with a heavy heart.

Tomorrow would bring nothing good to any of them.

***

"You will know as little about this company as it is possible to know," Bellatrix said the moment Lucius was shown into her office. She was not one for wasting time. "You will not follow orders from anyone but myself or Tom. And I sincerely hope I don't actually need to inform you of this, but you will not tell anyone why you're here, how you got the job, or what happened on July 8th. Whether or not they seem to know about it, or claim to know you know, you will keep your mouth shut. You know nothing, and that is the single most important aspect of your job. Do you understand?"

"Yes," Lucius said quietly. "I have no qualms about keeping my mouth shut, trust me. The less I know and say, the happier I'll be, not that it makes any difference to you. Now, Bellatrix, please. Enough of these 'top secret' warnings and foreboding tones. I get the point. Tell me what I'm doing."

"No. I'm not finished. And that is the last order you will ever give me," Bellatrix snapped, determined to inform him exactly what he was going into, whether or not he seemed to think he knew what to expect already. "Needless to say, you trust no one. That includes me. While Narcissa's best interests have, for some reason unknown even to me, taken precedence over my own, yours have not. I am not a nice person and I am _definitely_ not a nice boss, and it is important you realize that from here on out, you are at the bottom of the food chain." Pausing, Bellatrix looked at him sternly. "That said, you are absolutely required to do everything I ask of you, from fetching coffee to beheading janitors, if I so choose. Are we still on the same page, Malfoy?"

Lucius swallowed. "I don't have much choice but to be," he said.

"Now," Bellatrix said, pushing a piece of paper across the table at him. There were about a dozen names and addresses on it. "This is a list of the people you will be responsible for. Memorize it and destroy it. They are health inspectors, dirty cops, and union heads, all of whom need reminding of their loyalty to us on a regular basis. If any of these people behave in a way not in line with the best interests of Vol de Mort, you will be held responsible. I don't suppose I need to deign to utter threats? You should know already exactly what we are capable of. Goyle will be your driver. He will inform you of the best way to ask for his assistance, should you require it. Your job description may change at any time, and if it does, I will personally inform you. Any questions?"

"Am I getting paid, or am I merely a dancing monkey?" Lucius asked, taking the paper and looking it over.

"You will be paid twelve hundred pounds a week if you do your job properly, and nothing if you do not," Bellatrix answered. "Pay loss, however, will be the least of your worries if that is the case."

"I may not like this, Bellatrix," Lucius said, smirking slightly despite himself. "But whether or not I will do my _job_ properly should not be a worry of yours."

Bellatrix did not need to be reassured. It would be hard for Lucius, she had no doubt, but he would do what had to be done, and he would do it well. She could see it in his eyes.

Instead of addressing his comment, however, she just continued giving instructions. "You will visit three names off of the list each week, in the order they appear, and we will contact you if any special visits need to be made. You will report back to me at the end of the week. If you have no other questions, you're dismissed."

"Good enough," Lucius said. "Good day, Bellatrix."

"Malfoy," Bellatrix called, stopping him before he reached the door. "Make sure Narcissa keeps her mouth shut. There will be nothing I can do for her if she talks, and we have ways of knowing if she goes to her friends."

Lucius nodded, and then left. He had nothing else to say.

***

"Lucius Malfoy, you're impossible!" Narcissa shrieked, frustrated enough to rip her hair out. They'd been arguing for ages about how she wasn't allowed to talk to anyone, and Narcissa was sick of it. She couldn't go through this alone, and she needed more than just Lucius. He was in this situation because of her, and she couldn't talk to him about it the way she needed to talk to someone. "If I really want to, you can't stop me!"

"Well if you'd like to see the lot of us tossed over a ruddy cliff, or burned to death in our sleep, then go right ahead!" Lucius snapped back. "You talk, you sentence yourself, myself, Draco, and anyone you talk to to death. How is that so hard for you to understand?"

"You don't know them like I do," Narcissa snapped. "They won't tell. At least let me have Sirius. He's family. He'll get it."

"Narcissa. Use your brain, for _Christ's_ sake," Lucius said. "You know as well as I what Sirius does with the Prewett brothers, and with everyone else. Riddle has his eyes on all of them like ruddy hawks. If you say a word, he will _know_. This runs deeper than you can possibly imagine."

Draco toddled up and put his hand to her leg then, looking worried as he looked up at his mother, and all the fight promptly went out of Narcissa. She collapsed to a sitting position on the stairs and pulled Draco into her lap, wrapping her arms around him.

"I would never, ever do anything to put you in danger," Narcissa whispered fiercely into his hair. Looking over Draco to her husband, she added, "Nor you. But I cannot go through this alone."

"You have me, and you have Draco," Lucius said. "I don't know how you would even go _about_ speaking with Sirius, or anyone else, Narcissa. The phones could be tapped. The house could be bugged. _Anything_. We are not safe."

"Don't you think you're being a little melodramatic?" Narcissa asked, reluctantly letting her squirming son crawl off of her lap and over to his mini piano, plunking away at the keys. "That only happens in movies."

"I would rather be overly cautious and keep us alive," Lucius said. "I would not put anything past the demented mind of that lunatic. _Nothing_."

"Then I won't tell anyone," Narcissa said icily. "Not a soul. My lips are sealed. I'll just stay here, at home, every day, wondering if you're dead or arrested or something, and not speak to anyone and just remember that awful day over and over. Have you ever seen anyone get murdered? It's traumatic, Lucius."

"What do you want me to do, Narcissa?" Lucius asked, exasperated. "I am doing what I can to protect us. I have nothing else left."

"I know. Oh, Luce, I _know_ you are," Narcissa said, feeling a little terrible. She didn't believe it was all her fault, but there was no denying they wouldn't be in this situation if not for her, and here she was arguing with him about getting more people involved. "I'm a horrible wife, aren't I? I bet you wish you'd never married me. You're right. I know you're right. I'm sorry."

"You are far from horrible," Lucius said, moving towards her and kneeling next to her. "And I love you, Narcissa. I love that you're my wife, and the mother of my child, and everything about you. What's happened is a series of ridiculous, horrible circumstances. We just have to be the grown-ups we are, and deal with them as best we can."

"I don't think I like being a grown up," Narcissa said, only half seriously, and smiled in a strained sort of way. "It's too much work."

"Yes, yes it is," Lucius agreed sadly.

***

"Oh, fuck off Lou, you don't need another scotch," Sirius was saying, annoyed, as one of the regular barflies (who was drunk off of his arse) tried to convince him that another drink wouldn't hurt him. "Your tab's too high for one thing, and we don't want you dying of alcohol poisoning, for another. Ralphie's going to take you home, mate, all right?"

Lou murmured something indecipherable and Ralphie, the new bartender, walked around the counter and hoisted Lou to his feet, tugging him toward the door. Sirius followed them out with his eyes, serving a beer to someone else in the meantime, and was surprised to see Narcissa stroll in as Lou and Ralphie left. She stood out like a sore thumb in designer clothes, sunglasses at night, a kerchief tied around her head, and high-heeled shoes. "Evening, Cissa," Sirius said, grinning at her. "The moon bright tonight?"

"Be quiet!" Narcissa hissed and then crooked her finger at him so he knew he was to follow before she made her way to the girls' loo. It was empty save for one woman who Narcissa stared down until she left. She'd told Lucius she wouldn't tell anyone, but she couldn't take it anymore and she just had to, so she'd taken her cue from the movies and planned to turn all the taps on to cover their talking, just in case Sirius' work was bugged as well. At least then if she got caught by Lucius, she could honestly say she'd taken every precaution. Of course, the bar was even more of a dive than Narcissa had expected, and so Sirius would have to turn the taps on when he came in. Narcissa was _not_ touching them.

Startled and confused, Sirius called to Horrace that he had something to take care of before heading into the girls' loo after Narcissa. "What's going on?" he asked, but she put a finger to her lips and pointed at the grungy taps. Eventually Sirius caught the hint and turned them all on bust before facing her again and looking at her expectantly, not sure if he was allowed to talk yet or not.

Narcissa pointed at the door and mimed locking it, waiting until Sirius flipped the deadbolt before taking a breath and pulling off her sunglasses. "I have something to tell you and it's important that no one knows. And I mean it, Sirius. This is really, really big."

"Okay," Sirius said tentatively, not sure if he wanted to know. "How big?"

"Really, really big," Narcissa whispered, leaning close. "You have to swear not to go to the police. And you can't tell any of the freaks in that little group you're in either. You can't even tell Remus. And I really, really need to tell you, so please say you can keep it to yourself."

Sirius' heart started beating faster, and he screwed up his face. "Cissa. Cissa, that's a _lot_ to ask of me. I'm not saying no, but really. Isn't it something you can tell Lucius?"

"He knows, but I can't talk to him about it, not like I could talk to you. He's too involved," Narcissa said, and the expression on Sirius' face started to make her doubt the intelligence in telling him. It was a lot of pressure to put on him, after all. "Maybe I shouldn't have come. I thought it was worth all the risks, but I don't know that it's fair of me to involve you."

"Cissa," Sirius said, quietly. First he'd been overwhelmed with nerves, and now he was overwhelmed with concern. The tone of her voice, the way she was acting... if she needed Sirius, he'd be there for her. That's all there was to it. He shouldn't have questioned her in the first place. "Cissa, what's going on?"

This was what family meant. She knew she could always count on Sirius. After taking one last quick look around to make sure no one was in the room, Narcissa began to speak.

"I witnessed a murder. I walked into the room just in time to see Riddle shoot a man in the head. He tried to push me down some stairs, you know, get rid of the witness, but Bellatrix stopped him. And now, Lucius has to work for her. She traded me for him. They're going to make him do terrible things. If they find out I told anyone, they'll kill me, and Lucius too, and probably Draco. And you, if they find out you know. It's all such a mess, Sirius."

" _Christ_ , Cissa," Sirius said, his eyes wide. "Don't think I'm trying to... you know. But. I. I told you working for them was a bad idea. Shit. What's Lucius doing?"

"Threatening people they want to keep quiet, mostly," Narcissa said softly, almost leaning in to rest her head against his shoulder in relief of having told someone, and then deciding at the last moment not to appear _too_ needy. "He has to... make good on his threats sometimes, but mostly it's just paying people house visits to remind them all actions have consequences. It's almost poetic when you think about it."

Sirius swallowed. "Who. Who'd Riddle kill?"

"Some other designer," Narcissa answered. "Riddle had him bring over his designs, and then right before he pulled the trigger, he made some stupid, insane quip about how he could die happy knowing he'd just provided Vol de Mort with their winter line. He's obviously not all there."

"We were talking about that," Sirius said suddenly. "At the last meeting. It's all over the papers how this bloke, Yale Harris, this up-and-coming sort, has gone missing and they're suspecting foul play. They're scouring the bloody countryside for his body. Jesus Christ. And Gideon was talking about how he'd be willing to put money down on Riddle being responsible for it, and I guess he was right. Gid's got good fucking instincts. Cissa. Cissa, are you okay?"

"Yes, yes, I'm fine. Just a little scared," Narcissa said dismissively, but the tears welling in her eyes told another story. The only times could remember crying after the age of eight were when she first told Lucius she was pregnant, when she found out her parents were getting divorced right before her wedding, and then when the shock finally cleared over the whole murder mess. She'd cried a good portion of the way home from London, and then again when she'd hugged Lucius. She wasn't sure what had made her so prone to tears, but she didn't like it and she quickly slid her sunglasses back on to hide her eyes.

"Come here," Sirius said softly, and pulled Narcissa forward into a hug. He held her close and tight, and said, "It'll be okay, you know. It'll be over, and everything'll be normal again. Everything works out eventually, and karma has to come around and kick Riddle right up his fucked-up little arse."

"I'm sorry for involving you. I just had to talk to someone," Narcissa said, gratefully returning the embrace. When it mattered, Sirius came through. "Someone who wasn't too caught up in dealing with it himself that he could hardly see I was fit to burst with pent up panic."

"You can always talk to me, Cissa, promise," Sirius said. "You can drag me in the woman's loo anytime you like."

Narcissa couldn't help but laugh. "It's a good thing we're cousins, else I might have to worry about the wrath of Remus Lupin on top of everything."

"D'you know my mother once asked me what I thought of you as a wife?" Sirius asked, grinning. "I said, 'Isn't that incest, Mum?', and she told me, 'If you're going to be promiscuous I'd rather you keep it in the family.'"

"Your mother is a total freak," Narcissa snorted. "And thank you, Sirius."

"Yes, that she is," Sirius agreed. "And you're welcome, Cissa. Very."


	27. Happy Birthday to You! (July 28th, 2007)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Where the thought of their grown children is anything but reassuring, James tells a pharmacy employee a thing or two, and Harry and Draco enjoy some 'ake.

"Okay, so. The plastic magical baby play land bollocks is set up in the back yard," James said brightly, walking into the room. "I also put out all the lawn furniture so everyone will have somewhere to sit and such. And the meat is marinating next to the barbe. I'll put it on as soon as people start arriving. And that is one bloody brilliant cake. It's huge and beautiful, and Harry is going to love throwing it around and smushing it in people's hair. Personally, I hope he goes for Narcissa."

"Lovely," Lily said distractedly, putting the last bit of blue icing trim on the cake's bottom edge. She'd been preparing salads and grown-up desserts and other things all morning, and she was tired, but she still wasn't finished. It was amazing how much planning went into a one-year-old's birthday party, and Lily _was not_ looking forward to the day when Harry could request _exactly_ what he wanted. "I need you to run out and grab me a few extra things, while I get Harry ready. The list is on the fridge, there."

"No problemo. Our little man is going to celebrate in style," James said, grabbing the list and kissing Lily quickly before grabbing his jacket and walking out the front door. He glanced down, scanning the list as he pulled his car keys from his pocket and then froze. Turning around and promptly walking back inside, James called, "Lily? See, the red wine and tofu burgers, I get. There's just... uh. One little... pregnancy test. Pregnancy test? Really?"

Lily looked up from where she was wrapping syran wrap around the top of a bowl of potato salad. "I think so," she said. "It's that or I've got a very exaggerated stomach flu. I've been in and out of the bathroom all morning. I even threw up in the garbage can once."

"Really?" James asked again, and then, grinning, moved forward and swooped Lily into his arms. "That's fantastic! That's... Lily! Another baby!"

Lily was excited, but a little upset at the same time. She'd finally managed to land herself a job, and arrange everything with Rachel for Harry... now she'd only get to work a little while before having to stop again and take care of an infant and a toddler. Not that she didn't love the idea of giving Harry a sibling, but she just hadn't wanted to do it so close together. "Go on then," Lily said, kissing James lightly on the cheek. "Everyone'll be showing up soon, and there're still things to do."

"Hey," James said softly, brows furrowing in concern. "Come on, now. What's wrong?"

"I'm tired and nauseous," Lily said. "And I want to have another baby, James, but they'll just be so close together. And then work... they'll probably let me go once I'm too pregnant to work anymore. They have the right to refuse a contract while I'm still on probation..." Lily sighed. "I've just got a lot on my mind."

"Hey, look, I know you want to work and all, but at least my salary is enough to live off, and you could go back right after," James said, feeling bad that she felt bad. Not to say he wasn't a little disappointed she wasn't more excited--another baby!--but her points were valid, and he'd do his best to fix it. "Or I could ask for a leave from work, if you wanted. For a few months, and stay home with Harry and the new baby so they'd still have a parent about while you worked. We'll figure it out. You know I'd do anything to make you happy."

"I know, love," Lily said. "Now go on, really. And hurry up. I'd like to take it before the party."

"Sure, of course," James said, and kissed her on the cheek. "Back in a flash. You won't even notice I'm gone. I swear!"

***

"I can't say that pregnancy tests are really my forte," the guy said, uncomfortable, tugging at his collar. "I mean, a lot of women buy that one," he added, gesturing to a blue box, "But other than that... I mean. You know."

"Yeah, yeah," James said, absorbed in reading the information on the back of three different boxes he was juggling. "But which one is most accurate? I mean, which has the lowest rate of false positives?"

The pharmacy guy laughed awkwardly. "Well, I mean, if you really want to be sure that your girlfriend's not pregnant, best take her to a doctor, mate."

James, so focussed on reading the stats (did they really need to put it in such small writing?), took a moment to absorb the guy's words, and then looked up suddenly, affronted. "Well! I'll have you know that these are for my _wife_ , and I'd rather make sure she _is_ pregnant, actually, and not just sick with a bad bout of flu. So. So there. And I think I'll take all of them and let her decide, since you obviously can't help me. Ring me through."

"Sorry, uh," the guy said, taken aback by James' need to stand his ground. Christ, wasn't he a little young to be married? "I'm not a cashier, dude. Till's over there."

***

"Oi, Lils, I'm back!" James called and made for the kitchen. "Oh, hello Alice, Frank. Hi Nev, buddy, how are you? Good to see you all. Bags, bags everywhere or else I'd hug. Sorry I took so long, by the way. These bags are for the kitchen, and I'll just take this one upstairs."

Alice blinked, not even able to get a word in edgewise, and laughed as James set a couple of the bags down and then bustled out of the room again. "Goodness, I've forgotten how exhausting James can be. I don't know how you do it. Is he like that all the time? Like a whirlwind?"

"Only when he's high on himself," Lily said. "And I hate to be a bad hostess, Alice, but I'm going to go take care of that thing I told you about. I'll send James down as soon as I can. Hopefully no one else'll show up until. Well."

"You just take your time, sweetie. Neville is having fun looking through all the cupboards he can reach in search of food. He'll be content for at least another forty five minutes," Alice said sweetly, and shooed Lily out.

"Is she all right then?" Frank asked Alice after Lily'd left the room. "She looks quite tired and stressed."

"She's fine, Frankie," Alice said, pecking Frank on the lips and then smiling. "She has a lot on her plate, is all. She might be pregnant. Mum's the word, though, until she knows for sure and decides if she wants to start telling people."

"Well then," Frank said, surprised. "A lot on her plate indeed."

Upstairs, Lily slid into the bathroom. James was waiting for her with the test box in his hand, looking nervous. "Harry's not being a very enthusiastic birthday boy," Lily said, trying to distract herself. "He woke up fussy, let me change him and put on his clothes, then went back to sleep again."

"Maybe he's nervous about growing up," James said pragmatically, and then pointed at the two other boxes on the counter. He handed her the one he'd been re-reading. "I think that one's the best, but couldn't decide for sure. You pick."

"I'll take this one then," Lily said, looking at the writing on the box, but not reading it. "You know, the last time I took one of these things, I was alone in the loo at school. Would you believe I tore it apart and screamed at it when it came up positive?"

James' face crunched all up with regret. "I'd have done it with you, you know. I mean, obviously not the actual test. But I'd have sat with you. That's what boyfriends are for."

"So many irrational things were going through my head when I first thought I might be. I was so scared to tell you. I was afraid... and it sounds stupid, especially now, but I was afraid you'd leave me, or tell me you didn't want it."

"Oh Lils," James breathed and pulled her into his arms. "You're freaked this time too, aren't you? Beyond just... job worries."

" _Yeah_ ," Lily answered, returning the embrace. "Just... _Christ_ , James. It was so hard the first time, and Harry's only one... We've grown up so much because of him, and I love him so, so much, but we're only 19. It's just. It's scary. We hardly have time to act our age, James."

"I know. And you know I'll be with you every step of the way. We'll just face it as a family," James said softly, and then cracked a smile, hiding it in her hair. "I'm sorry, though. It's my fault. I'm just... too much of a stud."

"Stud?" Lily laughed. "You're so transparent, James. You're giddy and excited and _smiling_. All right. Let's do this. We have a party to host."

***

Harry was sitting up in the crib waiting for her when Lily went into the nursery to get him. He lifted his little arms to her and she gathered him up with a smile, and patted his bum. "Oh Harry," Lily sighed, as he leaned into her and went to stick his thumb in his mouth. Lily caught him, reached to the dresser for a soother and stuck it in his mouth. "You know what I was doing almost a year ago today, Harry?" Lily asked, sitting down in her rocking chair and holding him close, not quite ready to go downstairs.

"A year ago, around this time, I was lying downstairs, and me and Daddy, and Uncle Remus and Uncle Sirius, we found out we were going to have you and we had to _rush_ to the hospital," Lily said in her soothing, story time, mummy voice. "And you were in a big hurry, Harry. You didn't give Mummy and Daddy time to say hello. You caught us by surprise." Harry blinked up at her, sucking in on his soother. Lily smoothed his hair down. "Having a baby is a scary thing," Lily continued, smiling down at him.

"When they put you in my arms, Harry, it was the most _amazing_ and intimidating feeling. You didn't cry, you just blinked at me, and wriggled around..." Lily kissed Harry on the top of the head. "And now you're going to be a big brother. You're going to have a little brother, or a sister, and Mummy and Daddy get to have that wonderful feeling all over again," Lily said. "Maybe someday you'll have lots of little brothers and sisters. Would you like that, sweetums?"

Harry nestled into her chest again, and Lily laughed. "No, I suppose you'd love to be spoiled to death, wouldn't you, birthday boy? Speaking of birthday's, Mummy needs to stop procrastinating and get you down to your party. You only turn one once, little man."

***

Lily had gone downstairs to find James entertaining not only the Longbottoms, but the Weasleys as well. They'd invited Molly and Arthur, and they'd brought all seven of their children. James was looking a little shocked at the sudden influx of people, but Fabian and Gideon were there, herding the little creatures around with the ease of men who'd seen them at their worst and knew this was _nothing_.

Caradoc and Marlene were there as well, and though Caradoc seemed content to stand off to the side, Marlene was right in the thick of it, scooping Bill into her arms and tickling his attention away from the cake on the counter.

Shortly after, Sirius and Remus arrived with smiles and kisses and presents for Harry (a large truck with a handle so he could walk behind it to push it around from the both of them, and the extra little gift of a noise maker from Sirius and earplugs from Remus).

Edgar and Dorcas arrived then, with Ed's niece Susan, and she and Neville shyly offered each other various toys, much to the amusement of all the adults. Narcissa and Lucius were the next, and last, to turn up, very nearly on time, and both the parents and little Draco were dressed to the nines, as usual. Narcissa said she'd arranged for the present--a mobile, handcrafted by some French artist neither of the Potters had ever heard of--to be delivered on Harry's actual birthday (Saturdays were better for parties, and so Lily and James had arranged the party for the 28th instead of Tuesday the 31st).

The house wasn't small, but it certainly wasn't built for so many people, and they all made their way out back. The lawn was decorated with lanterns and balloons, and they all enjoyed a nice meal prepared by James on the barbecue.

Soon it was time for cake, and Harry, as predicted, loved it and immediately dug his hands right in, turning and smearing it onto Draco's head gleefully.

Draco looked at Harry, then at the adults, most of whom were laughing, except for Narcissa, who looked a cross between displeased that her son was covered in cake, and amused that her son was covered in cake. Practically every inch of Harry was wearing blue icing, and he was giggling and saying, "'Ake! 'Ake!"

Draco, after a moment of trying to decide if it was funny or horrid, burst into angry wails, and reached his little hands into his cake covered hair.

James snickered. "He's not very hardy, is he? You'll have to bring him over more often. Harry'll toughen him up."

"My son doesn't need toughening up. He needs friends who aren't ruffians," Narcissa retorted, but she was still hiding a smile.

"You do realize you're talking about one year olds?" Remus pointed out, smiling.

"Yes, but just wait until they're older," Lily mused. "Imagine us all in 15 years," she said. "Imagine us all as parents of teenagers. You too Edgar, Dorcas. I wonder what sort of relationships we'll all have with one another then, and what our kids'll be doing."

"Probably the same things we were doing when we were 15 and 16," Edgar said. "And that's not altogether reassuring."

Molly burst out laughing. "Not altogether reassuring? Perhaps you lot don't remember the full extent of it because you were the teenagers in question, but goodness! There were police involved, and secret societies, and sneaking about and breaking laws. You'd better hope your children aren't quite as outrageous a group you lot were, or you'll be grey before you're thirty!"

"We weren't that bad, Molly," Fabian piped up. "We were just... spirited kids, that's all."

"Spirited?" Dorcas snorted. "We're all fu-- uh, we were all menaces, we were."

Dorcas had already been shouted at for her language (and she didn't listen to very many people, but Molly Weasley was a force of nature, and it was just easier to listen, Dorcas thought), and so she was attempting to censor herself, at least around so many little ones.

"I want more cake!" Charlie shouted suddenly. "Can I have more cake?"

"Me first! I'm older!" Bill said, holding his plate out and practically climbing on the table to get closer.

"Something tells me your kids are going to be just as, ah, _spirited_ as we were. Are. What's with all this past tense? We're still ruddy menaces, thank you," James said, smiling widely.

Just then, Draco apparently decided he didn't like being ignored, and if he wasn't going to get attention for crying, he'd do it the way Harry had. So, he scooped up what was left of his cake in his little fist, and smeared it right in Harry's face.

Harry, for his part, just laughed and said again, "Ake! Mo' ake!"


	28. Optimistic (August 12th, 2007)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Where a vandalism head count doesn't quite add up, Severus practices self-preservation, and a married couple does as married couples do.

Dorcas, clad only in a light purple string bikini top and jeans she'd cut off to the knee, was not comfortable. It was an abnormally hot day, she was six months pregnant, and she was getting _really_ sick of it all. Especially in this fucking heat. She pushed sweaty hair out of her eyes and let herself into the basement. No one bothered knocking for meetings ever anyway.

"God, fucking Christ, I'm sweating like a fat man in a sauna," she complained, flopping down on the couch and throwing her arms above her head, half in dramatics and half to air out her armpits. She turned to shoot puppy eyes at Ed, who'd followed her in, and Fabian, who'd obviously already been in the sitting room. "Seriously. Can I have something cold to drink, please? I feel like I'm going to fucking spontaneously combust."

"Hi Dorcas," Fabian greeted her, rolling his eyes. "And it's only because you're pregnant, but I'll go up and grab you an icy glass of lemonade from the kitchen."

"Thank you. I love you. Marry me," she moaned.

Edgar sat down beside her and said, "If Fabian wasn't as gay as they get, I think I might be worried."

Fabian rolled his eyes and left the room, intending to bring a bunch of glasses down and the whole pitcher. He was sure it was warm enough that everyone would appreciate cold refreshments.

"Yeah, good thing he's a giant flamer," Dorcas mumbled. "Ed, I'm sick of being pregnant. Make it go away."

Edgar smiled, shifting slightly and rested a hand on Dorcas' belly. "Not that long to go."

"Hullo," Gideon said, coming into the rec room from his bedroom and sitting down in his chair. "You look warm."

"Have you been outside today?" Dorcas asked him incredulously. "It's the hottest day of the year. Fucking record breaking. Of course I'm warm. The air-conditioning is shot in Bonesie's car."

"I need a new car anyhow," Edgar said, sighing. "That piece of shit is a few days short of just collapsing."

"A friend of mine from work is selling his truck. 2001. Good shape," Gideon offered. "If you like trucks."

"He needs a truck," Dorcas replied. "He's going into the furniture business."

"So I've been told," Gideon said. "I mentioned you to him actually. Remind me to give you his number before you leave."

"Thanks, Gideon," Edgar replied, as the side door opened and Lily and Marlene walked down the stairs.

"Christ, could it be any warmer?" Lily asked, pulling off a short sleeved blazer and plopping down into a beanbag chair. "James' parents have some church thing to get ready for, so he's going to get Harry. It'll be too late to come over once he gets things squared away, so I just told him to stay home and that I'd fill him in."

"Fair enough," Gideon answered.

"How are you, Dorcas?" Lily asked sympathetically. The day she'd had Harry was the hottest day in the area until today.

"Well. I'm fat and hot," Dorcas answered lazily, but then sat up and smiled as Fabian came into the room with the lemonade. He set it down and poured her a glass, and Dorcas grinned at him. "It would never work between us, Fay. Thanks though."

"You're welcome," Fabian said, rolling his eyes as he poured himself a drink. "Hi Lily. Hey Marlene. Help yourselves if you're thirsty. I brought it down for everyone. The latecomers will have to share glasses if there aren't enough. How are you both, anyway?"

"Good. I told my boss I'm leaving at the end of the year, and he offered me a pay raise and a promotion if I stayed," Marlene said, settling herself on Gideon's lap. It was a little warm to comfortably enjoy body contact, but Marlene was still wet from the pool, and it kept her a little cooler. "It was a total ego boost, but obviously I turned it down. He said he'd give me the pay raise anyway, sweet man."

"I'm fine," Lily said. "The office is stuffy and they're too chintzy for air conditioning, so I've had a table top fan blowing at me all day. At least you've got air conditioning at home, Dorcas. I'm glad I'll have to deal with being pregnant again in cooler weather. Once in the summer heat was _more_ than enough."

"What? Lily, you're pregnant again?" Marlene asked, eyes widening. "Oh wow! Congratulations!"

"Congrats indeed. But you've hardly got a break from Harry," Fabian commented. "You're going to have two babies on your hands at once, brave woman. God. Babies will be everywhere!"

"Oh, shut up, Fabian," Dorcas replied. "You're so anti-baby. I think it's fucking awesome. God, not that I'd do it. I think having one will be enough work."

"Well. It certainly wasn't planned, but we'll make do," Lily said softly. "We always wanted Harry to have siblings, of course; this is just a little sooner than expected."

"Well you and James _are_ Super Parents," Edgar said reassuringly.

"Exactly," Gideon agreed. "And look at the bright side, you're having them young, while you've still got the energy to handle them. Marlene and I will be old fogies by the time we get around to it." His voice was teasing and he slunk an arm around Marlene, squeezing slightly.

"Sorry! We went for a little joy ride and lost track of time. We're not too terribly late, are we?" Remus asked as he made his way into the basement, motorcycle helmet under one arm.

"Nah, just a minute or two. You missed some big news, though," Fabian said.

"Oh yeah? What's that?" Sirius asked.

Lily rolled her eyes. "James is going to kill me for having told you without him being here," she said. "Even if it was accidental. But, um. I'm pregnant again."

"No! Oh, congratulations, Lily!" Remus gasped, and then grinned, swooping in and hugging her. Voice low, he said confidentially, "And it may be a bit scary, but you know you've got the lot of us to help you out."

Lily smiled. "Thank you. And I know."

"Wonderful!" Sirius exclaimed, sitting on the floor with a big grin on his face. "Another baby to spoil and give back when it gets annoying or poops!"

"Like you and Remus haven't changed as many of Harry's nappies as his parents have," Edgar said.

"Just for that I won't change any of Michele's," Sirius countered, waggling his eyebrows. "Nyah nyah nyah boo boo."

"Michele Rocket," Dorcas piped up, setting down her glass, empty save for the couple ice cubes that had poured in. "And didn't we come here for a reason? I mean, this is the Order, right? Not, I don't know, Baby Talkers Anonymous for all those fucking baby addicts out there."

"Like you're not giddy to pop your own out," Gideon said. "Besides, we're waiting for Caradoc, and we can't really start until he's here, since the mural is the primary reason for this meeting, and he called about an hour ago to say he had to make a few last minute deliveries before he could get here."

"And I'm not calling your kid _Rocket_ , by the way," Sirius interjected. "I'll call her Michele, or Chele or something."

"Chele," Dorcas said thoughtfully. "I like that. It's a little funkier than Michele. I suppose it's an acceptable nickname."

"Fine. Chele she is then," Sirius said. "Remus and I bought you a gift yesterday, by the way, and you're not allowed to tell us that it's too expensive or try to tell us that you can't take it, either. Isn't that right, Remus?"

"That's right," Remus agreed, smiling.

"Uh, hello. Are you maybe confusing me for someone else?" Dorcas said, rolling her eyes. "I fucking _love_ presents. What is it then?"

"A stroller," Remus answered. "Sirius' idea. He thought of it after you were grousing the other day about how bloody expensive they are. He pretends he isn't thoughtful, but he really is. You haven't bought one yet, have you?"

"He's thinking about me," Edgar said, but he was smiling. "We haven't bought one, no, but you really shouldn't have, mate. You didn't have to."

"Shut up, Bones," Sirius said. "You've been pissing and moaning about your car since you knocked Dor up, and now that's a little more money you can put toward a new one."

"Oh, he's getting a truck," Dorcas interjected. "It's a business expense. You know. Furniture and all that."

Remus smiled. He liked that Dorcas was proud of Ed's decision to make custom furniture. It was just one of the reasons he thought they'd actually make it, when so many who didn't know them as well as their friends did just assumed they wouldn't. "Indeed. He'll have to have a truck for that."

"Sorry, sorry!" Caradoc called from the landing as he rushed downstairs with three big paper bags in his arms. "Mary had me make a run across the lake, and it took longer than I expected. On the bright side, however, I have about six different sorts of salad, cold chicken for the meat eaters, and a lemon pie. Do you love me, or do you love me?"

" _I_ love you," Marlene said quickly. "I'm starved. I hardly had anything for lunch today."

"Ooh, did you bring my favourite? The crunchy caesar?" Fabian asked eagerly, getting up and greeting his boyfriend with a kiss before taking one of his bags and peering into it. "Ew, chicken. Here, McKinnon. Share nice with the rest of the carnivores."

Marlene took the bag eagerly, pulling out a drumstick and passing it on to Ed and Dorcas on the couch. She knew they ate meat, and Remus and Sirius too, who were on their other side. "Okay. Anyway, now that you're here, we can start the meeting while we munch, yeah?"

"Right, that we can," Gideon said, grabbing a paper plate out of a bag, along with a spoon and a tub of pasta salad. "Right, so do you have the outline of the mural finished?"

"I do," Caradoc answered, reaching into the pocket of his trousers and pulling out a folded piece of paper. Smoothing it out, he held it up for everyone; in permanent marker there was a sketch of Riddle in the lower right corner, holding a gun and pointing it toward the upper left corner. Spewing from the windows of smog producing factories were children in rags, animals, money and blood. Beside Riddle were stick thin women modelling his clothes, actual designs taken from the VDM website. "It's a little rough, obviously," Caradoc said. "I'd be happy for some suggestions."

"Well, who's he shooting _at_?" Remus asked. "You need a target."

"Culture. _Life_ ," Dorcas replied. "Fucker thinks he knows what art is. Bull shit he does."

"Right, so what if right there," Lily said, leaning forward and gesturing where there was a sort of blank spot, "You had the outline of a man, on his knees, begging for his life, and the substance of his body was peace, love, the earth, everything."

Sirius frowned. The depicted situation reminded him of what Narcissa had described of the murder she'd witnessed. "You could press the figure back, even," he said quietly. "So the blood and the factories and the children... you could do it so it's like Riddle's already shot him, and that's his blood and guts sprayed everywhere, floating down and dressing the models."

"That's... graphic," Remus said, but not disapprovingly. "It would probably be effective."

Fabian leaned forward, giving the sketch with a considering look. Caradoc was so good at painting, and Fabian couldn't wait to see the mural finished. Not only would it send out a message, but it would be beautiful. It was almost a shame to put something so nice on the wall of a Vol de Mort store. "Remember, it has to be powerful without being too detailed, or he'll never finish it in one night."

"I like that, the dressing the models bit," Caradoc said. "I'll do another sketch and try to hold on to that idea, but make it simple. Fabian's right; five to six hours, with that much space..."

"Well you can't do it by yourself," Gideon admonished. "I know it's your art, but couldn't you do the outline yourself, or something, and get Sirius and Remus to help you?"

"Sirius is a very talented painter, Cara," Lily said. "I can't speak for Remus, but Sirius would likely be more of a help than a pain in your arse."

"Sirius is very good," Remus agreed proudly, smiling at his boyfriend. "And James was actually quite decent as well, though I don't suppose he's thought one lick about it since art class at East Portlemouth," Remus said, smiling. "I'm sure either of them could help you out."

"Me too," Dorcas put in. "Make it as detailed as you like if you don't mind help. I fucking rock at art. You've got to be good if you want to be a tattoo artist. There are no do-overs in tattooing."

Caradoc smiled. "A little help would be wonderful," he said. "Are you sure you could handle it comfortably with the baby, though, Dorcas?"

"I'll be fine. I'm not an invalid," she replied, a little annoyed. While most often she liked the special treatment that came with being pregnant, it also meant she had to deal with everyone, including Ed, thinking she ought not lift a finger. It got boring after a while. Dorcas wasn't the sort of person who ever enjoyed laying back and watching life go by.

"No one thinks you're an invalid," Remus said, smiling kindly. "Just that you have other things to consider than just what you want to do."

"Oh, let the girl help," Marlene said. "If she thinks she can, there's no harm in it. Worst comes to worst she'll be taken in for vandalism, but I'm sure we're good enough and this by now that we can do it without getting caught."

"What sort of paint are you using?" Edgar asked. "I mean, I don't care about Dor doing it, so long as she's not inhaling anything toxic. And, er. So long as she stays on the ground."

"Well, I haven't picked up any paint yet, but when I do I'll ask for non-toxic specifically," Caradoc assured Edgar. "And no ladders. She can paint the models."

"So until you finalize a design, I guess that's that?" Fabian asked. "I think we should make it a goal to get the mural up before his winter line comes out at the end of October. Maybe by the middle of next month or so? That's more than enough time to get organized, isn't it?"

"Definitely," Caradoc agreed. "The middle of September, at the latest, I should think."

"Good stuff!" Gideon said, his mouth full of lettuce. Swallowing, he added, "Fay and I wanted to do a vandalism head count, too. Last on us was bricks through the van windows again. I'm seriously getting fucking sick of replacing the windshield."

"The tires were slashed on my car," Lily said, sighing. "I got them replaced yesterday. And there was another threatening note in the post box made of cut-out magazine letters, telling us to keep a close eye on Harry."

"The first aid box at work was emptied and replaced with rat poison and a note reading 'For Marlene McKinnon'," Marlene said, rolling her eyes. "Idiots. Luckily we had a back-up and we didn't really need anything before we replaced everything. Which was bloody expensive, too. My boss called the police. And... I mentioned last meeting about the tires and the seat of my bike getting trashed, right?"

"Yeah, I remember that," Dorcas said. "And the fuckers smashed in the little window to the basement bathroom for us. Anna and Joe thought it was just vandals, though, and so they replaced it. But it's on file with the police, anyway, so."

"A kid came up to me at work today and gave me this," Edgar said, pulling out a piece of paper. "I asked him who gave it to him, and he said 'a man in a halloween mask' which I thought was particularly lame. Roger's going to check the security cameras to see if a douche in a mask shows up, for whatever difference it'll make." Edgar handed the note to Gideon.

"'You'll have wished your bitch had gotten an abortion when we're through with you, you fucking faggot'," Gideon recited. "Creative. You filed it, right?" Edgar nodded and Gideon sighed, looking around. "Caradoc?"

"Someone took a marker to my apartment door and wrote, 'You'll Get Yours'," Caradoc answered. "Not overly poetic. They've been relatively indifferent to me since putting that cinder block through Mary's car by mistake."

"And I got three ominous voicemails complete with heavy breathing. Police, not surprisingly, didn't take it seriously, but at least it's documented. So. Sirius, Remus? What about you two?" Fabian asked.

"Uh," Sirius said, shifting uncomfortably.. "We're good, actually."

"Some books went missing from the library last week," Remus said, shrugging. "Uh, but they were about sex, and I think it was just some kids from class who were too embarrassed to check them out. So. Probably not Vol de Mort related."

Gideon blinked. "Has anything happened to you two? At all?" he asked.

Sirius licked his lips. "No. A few out-of-town creeps have stared me down at the bar, but I mean. No. No threatening notes, or slashed tires, or broken windows."

"No phone calls, ominous or otherwise. Nothing. That in itself is unsettling," Remus said thoughtfully. "I don't understand why not."

"Well," Fabian said slowly. "Just be thankful, I guess." After pausing to clear his throat--and exchange a confused look with Gideon--Fabian decided to move on. "Right, well. Everyone keep your eyes peeled and be careful, as usual. Now. This past weekend was the attempted hacking at VDM headquarters in London. We already know it went bust, but care to go into a little more detail? I know James isn't here, but Lily, if he told you any details, feel free to share them on his behalf."

"James waited in the car," Lily shrugged. She could feel the change in the air and knew that telling this story would not help to take eyes off of Remus and Sirius. It was too strange, though, she thought. Too obvious. Too neatly tied up with a ribbon and a bow and handed over to them as an 'obvious' answer to the spy question. She, for one, didn't think that Remus or Sirius would _ever_ do such horrible things to their friends. "All he said to me was that they went in with the cleaning crew, came running out and then they left."

"It was going well," Sirius said. "The one fellow, Ross, he showed us where we needed to go, and I started mopping the floor in the hallway while Remus went inside and set to work. I peered in every now and then, and he was getting through the system, and then an alarm went off. We don't know if I tripped it, or if the computer tripped it, or if one of the cleaning group caught on and set it off on purpose... We dunno. We didn't get anything."

"I don't think the alarm was set off by what I was doing on the computer," Remus said. "Nothing shut down, and I hadn't done anything particularly invasive yet. In fact, I'm sure it must've been in a different part of the building. I almost wanted to stay and continue, but... Well, we took the stairs down, of course, and left through a side door, and we didn't pass anyone save a confused looking coffee gopher and Ross. I know it sounds strange, but honestly, I've no clue what happened. Or why. It doesn't make any sense."

"Too right it doesn't," Fabian said. "Look, no one's jumping to any conclusions. Sometimes things just go sour for no reason at all."

"Yeah, particularly where Riddle is concerned," Gideon said, looking at his hands and furrowing his eyebrows, distracted. "I guess we're done on that front. It'd be too tricky to try and pull off again, so I guess we're just stuck without the employee list. But we'll manage." He sighed and looked around the room, not sure where to go from here. Settling on something plain and out there he said, "They found the designer. The one that went missing at the beginning of July. Shot right in the head, apparently."

"He was actually good, too," Fabian said, sighing. "He made the prettiest line of paisley vests for men. Totally queer, of course, but had a knack for evening wear. Total shame. They're claiming it was a gambling related murder. Supposedly he owed some fellows a lot of money."

Sirius knew he should probably say something, but there were no guarantees on what would happen if he did. Naricissa and Lucius would probably end up dead, for one, as would he, and likely every member of the Order as well. Besides, there was no proving that Riddle had done it beyond Naricissa's testimony, and with Lucius working for Vol de Mort... And he'd said he wouldn't. But it was strange to sit there and listen to speculation when he knew exactly what was going on.

"Sirius, mate? You all right?" Edgar asked.

"What? Oh. Yeah. Fine," Sirius answered quickly. Everyone was looking at him funny, Remus included, and Sirius realized with a painful dose of discomfort that he and Remus' trust levels were dropping dramatically. Someone was trying to pin this on them.

"Right. So," Remus said awkwardly. The worst thing about suspicion, Remus thought, was that denying it only made it stronger.

"Right so indeed," Fabian said, jumping in quickly in an attempt to cut the tension, voice just a smidge too cheery. "Okay. I guess that's all for today. Unless anyone has anything they want to add, you lot can head out. And paws off that crunchy caesar, Dorcas. I don't care if you're pregnant. He brought that for me, didn't you lovie?"

***

Lily pushed Harry along in his stroller. It was still early in the evening, and she'd gone home from the Order meeting to James having made dinner, and about halfway through remembered she'd agreed to meet Severus in the park. She was so very drained from the serious and uncomfortable tone of the meeting, a full day at work, and now using Harry as an excuse (so much as it pained her to even think it) to leave the house without James being suspicious.

She was still early on in her pregnancy and the nausea hadn't faded, and with everything on top of everything else, Lily was really just ready to scream.

She was late, but Severus hadn't bothered to entertain the thought of leaving. He already knew he'd wait an undignified amount of time for Lily, and that time had not nearly elapsed. So he just sat, watching the screaming children at the park in distaste. He didn't like children as a rule. Or rather, he didn't like children automatically. Though, when he turned and saw Lily approaching, pushing a stroller, he smiled.

"I was beginning to wonder if you'd forgotten," he said. "How are you? You look tired. Here, sit."

"Hello, Severus," Lily said, sitting and reaching to take Harry out of his stroller and sit him on her lap. "I'm fine. It's just been a long day. How're you?"

"Ai!" Harry said to Severus in lieu of a greeting.

"As well as can be expected," Severus replied, and smiled a little at Harry. It was distressing how much the child looked like Potter, but he could certainly see enough Lily in him that he felt a fondness for the thing, not that he'd ever admit it. "It must be nearly his bedtime, no?"

"Yes," Lily answered. "But he didn't nap this afternoon for his grandmother, so he could use to stay up a little longer. Otherwise he won't sleep until seven, at least, as he usually does. And needless to say James and I need all of the sleep we can get."

"Right, well then. I won't keep you too long, in that case," Severus said regretfully, and then froze as Harry crawled off of Lily's lap and towards Severus. He automatically reached out an awkward hand to keep Harry from sliding off the bench, and Harry evidently took this as an invitation to settle himself on Severus' lap. He blinked at Harry as he leaned his little boy body back against Severus, his short legs barely sticking out over Severus' knees. "Well. He's certainly gotten bigger since the last time I saw him."

"Well he's a little past one now," Lily said, smiling at Harry. "And he eats like a horse."

"I've brought some photos for you," Severus said, turning his attention from Harry and back to Lily as he reached for a folder of information he'd compiled for her. "As many as I could find, and simply names where I couldn't. If things are as bad as you say they are, than I thought it would be best for you to be as prepared as possible, so these are all the people that might be important. They are all fairly high ranking employees."

He'd left Peter's name off, for no reason other than self-preservation. Only he, Bellatrix, and Riddle himself knew anything about Peter, and since Bellatrix would never let anything about him slip to the Order, Severus knew he was the only other option. Besides, he hadn't seen Peter for weeks. He never came into the office anymore, and Severus hadn't spoken to him in ages. He assumed Peter had exhausted his usefulness, and thus had been let go. If he wasn't involved anymore, telling Lily would have no effect on future events, and would only be to serve justice to past slights. He was doing his part to keep Lily, and by extension her family and friends, safe, but it was not his responsibility to end broken friendships. Severus felt no sense of kinship with Peter. He was a pathetic excuse for a person. But at the same time, he understood the sorts of slow simmering loathing that came from being nothing more than an object of disdain to the Marauders. One of many differences between Peter and Severus came from the fact that Severus had not let it take over his life. He'd moved above it and beyond it and he had his own life to be concerned with.

"Thank you, Severus," Lily said, taking the folder from him with a heavy heart and flipping it open. It was so important for her, and her family, and her friends... they needed to be prepared for whatever insane thing Riddle was plotting against them. She knew it was coming. She could feel it, prickling her skin, raising the tiny hairs on the back of her neck. It loomed over all of them, haunting them, and Lily knew she wasn't the only Order member who'd noticed it's presence. "I really appreciate you doing this for me. For us," she added, referring to the Order. "When we were younger it was such simple thing to join and do petty vandalism and protests and things, but now... Now it's almost as though we're fighting for something more important. We have families to protect."

"Well, you seem to be doing a fantastic job of it so far," Severus said, gesturing to Harry who was contentedly seated in Severus' lap and playing with the bracelet from his birth mother that Severus hadn't removed since he'd gotten it back from Potter and Black, those thieves, in first year. "He's happy and healthy. You should be proud. Many aren't able to do what you're doing at your age."

Lily laughed quietly. "No, I suppose not. God. What am I doing?" she asked, looking up at Severus with a frown on her face. "I mean, I've said the same things to James, and he understands, but... Sometimes I wonder if he really _gets_ it. We're both still so young, nineteen and married with a child and another one on the way..."

"Another? Lily, really?" Severus interjected, eyebrows raised in surprise. "Are you quite ready for that?"

"No," Lily answered honestly, and annoyed at herself for letting it slip twice in one day. "Not even close. Especially not where we are right now... James' career is blooming and mine has hardly started, and Harry's only one. In six months time I'll hardly be in a working state, then come April I'll be juggling a toddler and an infant. And James says, 'We'll get through it together, Lils, as a family' and I know he means well and only wants the best for both of us, but sometimes it feels as though he's stuck with his sights on some white picket fence existence, me in an apron and him smoking a pipe."

"Well, you already know what I think about Potter. But something tells me encouraging you to think the worst of him right now won't help," Severus said, sighing. Despite her words, he knew she was scared and frustrated at the moment, he wasn't the one. She hadn't picked Severus. She didn't need a friend who hated her husband right now. She needed her husband, or, more importantly, her _faith in_ her husband. "As much as you know it pains me to say, Lily, he's always thought the world of you, and one of the best things about you is your exceptional uniqueness. He wouldn't want you to be ordinary, because he fell in love with the extraordinary. Though I'll deny ever saying it and I only deign to it in this case because of my faith in your good taste, you owe him a little more credit. He's totally daft and a completely immature imbecile, of course, but he'd hang the moon for you. And he's in a position to do far more to help you right now than I am."

Lily's eyes started to water and she knew that Severus was right. James thought everything and more of her, and would do anything to make her happy, and to make her feel wanted and understood. It just made her feel bad to know how much more he wanted this second child than she did. Not that she didn't, because she did, but a vicious, selfish little voice in the back of her head kept telling her that this child was just pushing her even further away from starting her life. "You're right. But I guess sometimes it's easier to take my insecurities out on him than to face my own demons. Or to just talk to him about things."

"Oh Lily," Severus said softly, and reached over to awkwardly take her hand. Crying girls usually did nothing but make him sneer at their emotional weakness and absurd sense of social propriety, but Lily was a different story.

Harry, apparently sensing something was wrong, let go of Severus' bracelet and looked up at his mother, holding out one hand in her direction. "Mama?"

Lily squeezed Severus' hand in what she hoped was a thankful way, and then took Harry in her arms, holding him close. He seemed to take this as a cue that she was okay now that he was there, and he started playing with the ringlets of hair around her ears that had fallen out of her messy bun. "It's getting late," she said quietly. "I should probably head home. Before James starts to worry."

"Yes, you probably should," Severus agreed. "And Lily? Just talk to him. He's an ignorant buffoon and unless you talk to him, he won't have any clue. So just... speak with him? I don't want you to be unhappy."

"I will. And thank you, Severus," she said as she settled Harry back into his stroller, tucking the folder into the basket in the back. "For everything. Please, call me again soon, won't you?"

"I will. I promise," Severus said, getting to his feet and nodding at her. "Take care of yourself."

***

Lily had been staring at the same line in her novel for the last five minutes. She'd come home and James had whisked Harry away to bed to let Lily have some time to herself, and they'd watched the telly together for a bit, and now here they were sitting in bed, and they'd soon turn out the lights and go to sleep, and Lily _still_ hadn't said her piece. She didn't know what to say, or how to even go about it, but Severus was right. If she didn't say something, how would James know?

James turned the last page of the effectiveness study Sturgis had put together of James' last advertising campaign. James had come out with fairly good scores this time, just like all the other times. Despite being tossed in over his head right out of school, he still had consistently higher scores than people with similar positions in other departments of the large, international company. His bosses were all rather impressed with him.

He turned to look at Lily (James never could go very long without looking at her when they were in the same room), frowning as he saw her staring blankly at her book. He watched for a moment more, but her eyes definitely weren't moving, and she wasn't turning any pages. He set his work papers aside, leaned over and plucked her book from her hands, folding the page corner and setting it aside, and then kissed her on the cheek.

"Something," he said, pausing to kiss her again, this time on the neck. "Is wrong. What's up, Lils?"

Crap. Well. Now was as good a time as any, she supposed. Lily sighed. "I've just. I've been doing a lot of thinking," she started slowly. "I don't really know how to say this. I just... I don't want you to think any less of me. As your wife, I mean."

"You know there's nothing you could say that would do that, Lily," James said, suddenly sobering. It sounded serious.

"I... I want this baby, James. I do. It's just that, well. I guess I'm a little resentful of the fact that this new baby is standing in the way of me really starting my life, my _own_ life, because since Harry came into the picture it's just been _our_ life, and I feel like... Like I've forgotten who Lily Evans is."

James blinked at her blankly for a moment, and then his face changed and sat up straighter, facing her. "I didn't... Lily, I had no... I..." He didn't know what to say to that. Tentatively, he said, "I asked at work. About paternity leave. They said I'm entitled to a whole year at 70% pay if I want it. I asked about it, Lily. I wasn't kidding. If you want to work, I could do it. Stay home with the kids."

"Really?" Lily asked, surprised. "You'd be. You'd do that?"

James smiled a little and ran a hand through his hair. "Lily, of _course_ I'd do that. I love my family. You and Harry and this baby are the only reason I work at all, so that I can give you what you need. If it would make you happy to be at work, I'd be more than happy to be a stay at home dad for a while."

Lily smiled slightly. " _Thank you_ ," she said. "I don't want to be selfish, James. I just. I don't want to say, in a year's time, that I'm a twenty year old homemaker with two children. I love you, and our babies, I just expected different things of myself when I was younger, and I want a chance to explore that along with all of our other responsibilities."

"Hey, don't. Don't do that to yourself," James instructed gently. "You have every right. And I would love the chance to get to know Harry better, and to learn to be as good a parent as you with baby number two. You have nothing to feel guilty for, okay? These are modern times. I'm a liberal guy. I don't buy into that Suzy Homemaker shit, and you shouldn't either. We're both parents and the responsibility to take care of our family and each other falls equally on both of us. How we decide to split it up is our business, and it doesn't matter what society or anyone else thinks of it, okay?"

"I must have lost my sanity for a stretch there," Lily said. "Because I'd somehow managed to forget that you are the most amazing husband on planet Earth."

"Must be all the pregnancy hormones," James said earnestly, and decided not to hold it against her. He hadn't even noticed she was so upset about it, and he should have. He'd had no idea. "You know, they come with being pregnant. Because you are. Pregnant with our second child. Are you excited now? I'm excited."

"I'm getting there," Lily replied, grinning now. "And I love you, James. Very much."

"I love you too," James said, returning the smile. "Hey, can we have sex? Are you in the mood? Can I make you in the mood?"

"I certainly wouldn't object to you trying to get me in the mood," Lily said.

"Okay," James said, and started to kiss her.

He took his time and didn't rush, and even gave her a massage and everything. He really was the most amazing husband on planet Earth. And lucky for him, he had the most amazing wife on planet Earth to match.


	29. Whatever (September 6th, 2007)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Where there is an attempt to mend old wounds, surprising civility, and polite conversation.

Severus sighed impatiently, shifting the books in his arms and glancing around with irritation. The line stretched from the register to the back of the store, and he was last. The weather was still warm, and his clothing stuck to him uncomfortably. Four science texts--particularly the over-sized ones required of his classes--were hardly worth the combination of sticky weather, body heat, and the invasion of his personal space. But he would wait, despite this, because as much as the situation annoyed him, it would be far worse to go to his classes unprepared.

"Excuse me, is this the end of the line?" Remus asked a passing employee as he juggled his books, stopping a heavy compilation text of Victorian poetry from falling and dropping a thinner soft cover in the process.

"Uh, yeah," the guy answered and continued on his way.

Remus nodded his thanks and stepped into line, awkwardly bending to pick up his dropped book. The person in front of him was in the way from the new angle, and Remus had to scoot to the side and reach around the man. Standing up, Remus blinked in shock.

"Severus? Severus Snape?"

Severus turned his head, and surveyed Remus with a certain amount of annoyance and surprise. "Remus," he said curtly, and nodded. "I take it you're going here as well? Or have you a penchant for university bookstores?"

"As much as I love bookstores, no, I'm not just here for that," Remus replied, smiling warmly. He hadn't seen Severus in over a year. "I'm starting in the English department. You're here for science, I assume? Chemistry was always your strong point, wasn't it?"

"Yes," Severus answered, resigning himself to conversation with Remus for the duration of their wait. "I plan on teaching, as out-of-character as it may sound."

"Really?" Remus asked, smiling. "Me too. It was either be a teacher, or a librarian. I thought teaching would be more interesting. English literature, really. So was I right? Chemistry for you?"

Severus nodded. "I figured it would be best to stick with my strong suit," he said. Figuring it better to be remotely polite rather than intentionally rude, Severus asked, "I take it that it's just yourself attending? I doubt Black is the sort with ambitions lying in higher education."

"Indeed, it's just me. Sirius is happy at the bar. He wants to run it on his own one day," Remus commented. "So. How far is your commute every day? I'm over an hour. I use the train, the bus, and my feet."

"I live in the dorms, actually," Severus answered. "So five minutes in any direction would be accurate."

"That'll be incredibly convenient. You are going to get so much more sleep than I am," Remus said, smiling wryly. "Especially considering I have a boyfriend who keeps ridiculous hours."

"I can only imagine," Severus said, smiling despite himself. "That is, if East Portlemouth were any indication."

Remus rolled his eyes in agreement, a little surprised at the civility of the conversation. Needless to say, Remus and Severus had never gotten on in school. They'd both grown up, though, and obviously they'd matured.

"So I don't expect we'll have any classes together, at least not until we do our PGCE. Chemistry and Lit don't exactly cross," Remus commented. "Are you taking any out of timetable classes? Or clubs or anything like that?"

"Latin," Severus answered. "I don't have time for it as a class, with my schedule. I want to learn it, however, and there is a club, of sorts, on campus."

"Tuesdays and Thursdays at four," Remus laughed. "If that's the same one, I'm in it too. Looks like we might be seeing a lot of each other."

"Indeed," Severus said. "I never knew you had an affinity for Latin."

"Nor I you," Remus countered. "I've always been interested, but there was never an opportunity before. What's your reason?"

"The same really," Severus said. "And it's the basis of so many things that I'm studying; it seems fit to learn it to properly appreciate things."

"So do you have anywhere in particular in mind for once you're done here?" Remus asked curiously. "To teach, I mean. I rather fancy East Portlemouth, but I'd imagine it'll be really hard to get on there considering it has such a prestigious reputation. I just have so many fond memories, you know. And... a particular insight in regards to all the nooks and crannies."

"I'd like to go back there, as well," Severus said. "But I imagine it will take a few years of experience, at the least, to even be considered there."

"I hear alumni are at least guaranteed interviews," Remus commented. "Though, you're probably right. There's no shot getting in right out of school."

"It's not even worth trying. A decade from now, perhaps," Severus said. "With much emphasis on the perhaps. Tell me, Remus; how have you been since graduation?"

"Working at the library," Remus replied. "I was teaching basic computer and research classes to children. It was... taxing. What about you?"

"Very tedious public relations for a London based firm," Severus lied smoothly. "It was a waste of my time and brain power, to say the least. They were less than pleased to receive my resignation."

"Next!" called the woman behind the till.

"Oh, that's you. I guess I'll see you on Tuesday," Remus said, and held out his hand. "It was a surprisingly enjoyable to talk to you."

Severus took Remus hand and shook it. "Surprising, indeed. It's amazing what a year can do."

"Next! Now!"


	30. Strange Days (September 7th & 8th, 2007)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Where there is sand put in inappropriate places, tension and loose lips, and the sexy Jessica ~~Remus~~ Rabbit.

Children and parents alike were playing and visiting in the park, enjoying the lingering warmth from summer as fall began to turn the leaves red. The nice weather wouldn't last much longer, and Harry and Neville seemed happy enough to enjoy it while it lasted.

Sitting just a few short feet away, Lily and Alice watched their young boys play in the sand box together.

"Narcissa is coming, isn't she? I don't know why she's never on time for her friends," Alice said, wearing a smile to show she wasn't bothered by her own comment. "Goodness knows she's never late for any of her work things. Though there've not been any of those, lately. Has she told you what's going on, Lily?"

Lily sighed and shook her head. "No. She doesn't talk about the tabloids, although I can tell she's bothered by them," she said as Harry flung a plastic shovel at Neville's head and both babies started giggling. "She's been so preoccupied all summer. I don't know _what_ to make of it."

"You could just _ask_ me, you know," Narcissa said as she appeared behind them, pushing Draco in a top of the line stroller and dressed in what she liked to refer to as high class casual. She was wearing a light blue silk floral skirt and a long, cream, low-cut v-necked shirt with matching cream kitten heels. When she bent to pull Draco out of his stroller, he was wearing a matching blue shirt and a cream cap. Having finally learned that no matter how classy she wanted her son to look, toddlers were still going to get dirty, Narcissa had him wearing little jean shorts and runners at the very least. As he stumbled off to join Harry and Neville, Narcissa sat herself next to Lily and Alice and smiled at them. "Just because I won't tell those vultures at the tabloids doesn't mean I won't tell you. Go on."

Lily blinked in surprise. "Fine then. Why aren't you working anymore then?" she asked, smiling slightly. "I'm sure it's not because you've got horrid cellulite, or because you're addicted to heroin."

"No, neither of those. I am as flawless as ever, and I'm a mother. Good mothers don't have drug addictions," Narcissa answered, and then smirked at them both. "And just because I said not telling the tabloids doesn't mean I won't tell you doesn't necessarily mean I _will_ tell you either. You can guess, if you'd like to."

"Oh, Narcissa," Alice said, laughing. "You're such a brat."

Rolling her eyes, Lily said, "Some things never change, do they?" The boys were squealing and flinging sand about, and Lily sighed again, watching them. "They're so big. Can you imagine? Feels as though just yesterday we were all sitting around in the loo, the three of us, remember? Predicting how our boys would be best friends forever?"

"It was fun, even if it was scary," Alice said with a smile. "I'd miss it if I weren't looking forward to seeing little Nev grow up so much."

"I don't. Going back to that would mean pushing Draco out from my loins _again_ , and it hurt enough the first time," Narcissa said. "Draco, no eating sand, sweetie. I say no. Out of your mouth, Draco. Good boy."

"You know, I ran into Fiona Walston the other day. She was home from London, visiting her parents for a week, and she said to me, 'Oh Lily! It's lucky for you that you didn't end up going to uni. Some of the classes, dear! They'd be _far_ too challenging for someone like you.' Then she was fussing over Harry, in his stroller, and said, 'Dear me, Lily, do you think you're feeding him enough? He's fat!' Unbelievable really."

"That stupid slag," Narcissa said casually.

"Cissa!" Alice said, sounding amused and disapproving all at once. "The kids are here."

"Oh, they can't hear me. And she is a slag. She tried to seduce Lucius when he came in to visit me one time," Narcissa sniffed. "And she was a cow to all of us. She's not pregnant yet, is she? I hope she never gets to have kids."

"No," Lily answered. "From what I've heard she's been throwing herself at every bloke she's come across, but they don't pay her any mind. Serves her right. You know, she once said to James, while we were still at school, that it was such a shame he'd knocked me up because they could've had some real fun together. Some people take vanity to a whole new level."

"Well, she never threw herself at Frank," Alice said. "Or, if she did, Frank never told me about it. Though it's probably more likely he didn't even notice. He's only ever had eyes for me."

"Oh, gag me," Narcissa said. "Your devotion to each other is sickening. Have I ever told you so?"

"You never saw them at the height of their sickening devotion," Lily said. "Harry! The shovel goes in the sand, sweetums, not in Draco's ear."

"Thank _God_ for that," Narcissa said. "I probably would've pushed them down a flight of stairs or something."

Alice just rolled her eyes. She and Frank had, looking back, been a little overly sugary to each other. She could imagine it might have annoyed some people. "So, ah. I've heard Lucius quit teaching. It looks terrible for Albus, having vouched for him after everything and then having Lucius just up and _quit_ , no notice or anything. Schools are going to be reluctant to hire him even more so now than before."

"Yes, I expect they are," Narcissa replied coolly. "Good thing we don't need the money."

"Indeed," Lily sighed, arching an eyebrow at Narcissa with disbelief. There was something else going on, and Lily was certain that Narcissa would feel a million times better about things if she'd just be honest about it. But it wasn't Lily's place to pass judgement, or to try and force Narcissa to tell her things that she didn't want to.

"Okay, fine. Don't believe me," Narcissa huffed. "I just can't tell you, all right?"

Lily nodded mutely, and turned back to watch the boys, who were squabbling over a green plastic bucket. Clearing her throat she decided it was time for a subject change and said, "The nausea is waving off, finally."

"Oh, that's good. I hated the whole puking thing, especially since at that time, I was hiding being pregnant from everyone," Alice said. "Though, even if it's all out there in the open, I think it must be the worst part about getting pregnant."

"I was lucky. I didn't really get much morning sickness. Or, not frequently enough that Elladora even picked up on it," Narcissa commented, smiling to herself as Draco took Harry's shovel away from him after Harry poured sand on Draco's feet. "They play relatively well together, don't they?"

"Yeah, I think we all got pretty lucky with out little guys," Alice said fondly.

"It isn't luck. It's good genetics," Narcissa said, demurely crossing one leg over the other. "We are all exceptional women, and we picked fairly exceptional men. Though, Lily, I fear Harry is going to have his father's hair. I'm so sorry."

Lily laughed. "It's quite all right. We suspected as much when he was born four weeks early and looked like an Eskimo," she said. "The paediatrician thinks he might need glasses before he hits three. He already stumbles into doors, silly boy."

"Draco is pretty graceful for his age, I think. He takes after his exceptionally poised parents, obviously."

"Oh, certainly he does," Alice said, voice teasing as Draco began using his stolen shovel to put sand into his shoes.

Smiling wryly, Lily said, "If their current behaviour is any indication, there're lots of scraped knees and dirty trousers in our futures. There're plenty of dirty trousers in my present though, mind. Last week when we had that really warm day, after it rained? James took Harry into the backyard and the little scamp got right into the mushy flower garden. While James was fiddling with the barbie, Harry was destroying my begonias and eating dirt. Our son, if you please."

"I thought you were going to say that James started a mud fight or something," Alice giggled. "Seems like something he would do. And my condolences to your begonias."

Before Lily could respond, Neville let out a little cry and Narcissa, who was staring intently at the boy, put a hand on Alice's arm. "He looks like he's having trouble breathing."

The three mums got to their feet and quickstepped to the sandbox. Neville was sniffling through tears, his face starting to swell. Harry stuck his thumb in his mouth, staring at Neville with wide confused eyes, and Draco looked at his mother and said, "Mama?"

"He's having an allergic reaction to something," Lily said, reaching for Harry.

"Call an ambulance," Alice said, face white as Neville stopped sniffling and started wheezing. "Now!"

***

"Oh James, Frank," Lily said with relief, getting to her feet and shifting Harry, who was fussing, to James. "Just go to the desk, Frank, Alice is still in with the doctor. They'll let you in."

"Thanks, Lily. Did they tell you what it was?" Frank asked.

Lily shook her head. "No. Some sort of bite; it was hard to tell through the swelling."

"Nev's going to be okay though, right?" James asked Lily as Frank headed for the desk. He bounced Harry around a little and Harry's fussing quieted for the moment.

"Oh yes, fine," Lily said, still a little shaken up. "The ambulance got to the park just in time, and most of the swelling had gone down by the time we'd got here after them."

"Harry and Draco were both very worried, but they're calming down a little. Draco cried the whole way here, my poor, sensitive little boy," Narcissa put in.

James smiled a little, amused even through his own worry. "Hi Narcissa. Good to see you outside of tabloids. You look good. The alien abduction was a fake, I guess?"

"Yes. And that one was annoying. It meant I had to get a new hairdresser," Narcissa sighed. "You have no idea how hard it is to find a good hairdresser in a small town."

"My favourite was the one about her running an underground Nazi organization with Prince Harry," Lily said. "You'll have to introduce me, Cissa."

"Yes, once I meet him I'll be sure to," Narcissa replied, rolling her eyes. "Honestly. At least they're imaginative. I must admit I'd be insulted if there wasn't any wild and outlandish speculation on my absence, or paparazzi showing up at least twice a week to try and catch me in my drug addiction."

"I swear some of the people we went to school with must have joined up with tabloid papers just to write about you, Cissa," Lily said. "The fascination with drug addictions amuses me to no end. They said we were all shooting up together at school too, to cope with being parents."

"What a load of rubbish," James snorted, rolling his eyes. "Isn't that right Harry? It's rubbish? Say rubbish!"

"Rubbish!" Harry agreed loudly, earning them some dirty looks from other patients waiting in the emergency room.

" _James_ ," Lily reprimanded, smacking him lightly on the arm, but she was smiling. "People are going to think we're bad parents."

"Oh, bollocks. They will not, because we're great parents," James said, smiling widely.

"Bollocks!" Harry shouted then.

Snickering, James said, "Okay, maybe now they will. Sorry. That's a bad word, little man."

"Bad word," Harry said, seeming to agree, and James just pressed a big sloppy kiss to his cheek, which promptly made Harry giggle and wipe at the saliva on his face.

"Kiss," Draco said from his spot in Narcissa's arms. Narcissa smiled and kissed him.

"Kiss, indeed," Lily said, sitting back down again. "And I'm sure you'll be getting lots of kisses, Draco, you little heartbreaker."

Coming back into the room with a sniffling Neville clinging to her, and Frank's arm around her waist, Alice stopped in front of her friends and said, "Well, he's allergic to bees. It sent him into anaphylactic shock. He almost stopped breathing on the way here, did you know? My poor baby boy."

"Bees? Really?" Lily said, surprised. "That's quite serious then, if that was only from one little sting."

"He'll have to have an epipen wherever he goes, but he's a strong-willed lad," Frank said. "He'll get by."

"Oh, of course he will. He's our Neville," Alice chimed in.

"So he's going to have a medic alert bracelet then?" James asked. "Remus has one of those now. He used to just have a card in his wallet about it, but it's much safer to have something out where others can see, just in case."

"Yes, he'll be getting one as soon as possible," Frank said. "Although I don't think he's going to be too happy about having something dangling on his wrist all the time. He kicks up when there's so much as a hat on his head."

"Well, he'll just have to get used to it, won't you Nevvie?" Alice cooed and kissed the side of Neville's face, and though the boy wouldn't remove his arms from around his mother's neck, he did lift his head a little. "That's mummy's good little boy."

***

"Lucius? Are you home?" Narcissa called as she let herself into the house, Draco on her hip. There was no response, and so she walked into the sun room, shrieking and startling Draco when she spotted Lucius seated on her favourite loveseat, glass of some sort of alcohol before him, though it looked largely untouched. "Lucius? Why didn't you answer me?"

"I didn't hear you," Lucius answered, his voice a soft, distant monotone. Reaching forward, he picked up his glass of scotch, swoshing the liquid around but not drinking it.

"Are you all right?" Naricissa asked, setting Draco, who'd started babbling 'Dadda', on the floor to toddle curiously to his father, putting his little hands on Lucius' legs.

Lucius ran a hand over Draco's smooth blond hair, although he was looking at him with an emotionless expression. He didn't answer Narcissa.

Lucius was acting really strange and Narcissa wasn't quite sure how to react. "All right. Well, you won't believe what happened today," she started, sitting down next to him. "I was at the park with Lily and Alice and their boys, and Neville had this terrifying allergic reaction to a bee sting..."

"I shot a man today." Lucius managed, quietly.

"...that made him swell all up and you what?" Narcissa said, eyes widening. "You... Lucius, who? Who did you shoot? Oh my God."

Lucius swallowed. "The foreman. Of one of the factories," he said. "He was... he threatened to report Riddle for abusing loopholes in child labour laws, and out right ignoring them... and I shot him. In the foot. And I told him... _Christ_. 'One more threat and it'll be your head.'"

"Oh _Luce_ ," Narcissa gasped, covering her mouth with one hand. "That's... you could... that's a murder threat. You could go to jail. You could... this is getting way out of hand. It needs to stop. What if we go to the police and tell them what I saw?"

"No proof," Lucius said, picking Draco up, struck, hugging him tightly. "We'll be killed and nothing'll be done. Pick us off, one by one. It's too complicated, Cissa..."

"This is not how my life was supposed to go," Narcissa said angrily. "I had it all planned out, and if not for stupid T.M. Riddle, it would be exactly how it should." Narcissa tried to quell her anger. She knew she was irrational when she was angry and scared, and she knew that just because it had worked for her in the past didn't mean she could afford to take risks with her family now. Taking a deep breath, Narcissa asked softly, "Are you okay?"

"Just disgusted with myself," Lucius said quietly. "The idea of... of physical punishment for anything; my actions go against my beliefs, Cissa, and I've become a complete contradiction in what I do."

"It isn't your fault," Narcissa replied softly. "It's mine. And it's out of your control."

"It's not your fault, Narcissa," Lucius said. "It's the result of a hodge podge of bad decision making."

"I told Sirius," Narcissa blurted suddenly, after a moment of silence. "I had to. I had to talk to someone who didn't make me want to pull all my hair out in guilt. It _is_ my fault, all of this is. I just... I had to tell him."

"You what." Lucius deadpanned. "Narcissa. You. _How_ could you do that?"

Ignoring Lucius' question, Narcissa asked one of her own. "Do you think that's why? I mean, if maybe they found out I told, they could've arranged for you to, for you to have to shoot someone. I don't know how they could've found out, though. I was so careful, Lucius, I swear I was."

"Shooting him was my own decision, Narcissa," Lucius said. "It had nothing to do with anyone but myself. I was told to do my job and to do it well and _that_ was the line I had to cross. If they knew you told Sirius... It would be him I'd be asked to shoot."

"So they don't know, and he won't tell anyone," Narcissa said quickly. "So it's okay then. I told him and nothing bad happened."

" _Yet_ ," Lucius mused. "Don't underestimate your sister, Narcissa."

"She's helping us," Narcissa reminded him. "She may not be on our side, but she wouldn't let anything happen to me."

"To you, perhaps, but she wouldn't hesitate on hurting me, or Draco, or Sirius, or anyone else," Lucius said. "Her protectiveness of you is purely inclusive."

"But if she hurt you, or Draco, or Sirius, or anyone else I'm close to, it would hurt me," Narcissa pointed out, though she sounded uncertain. Her faith in Bellatrix Lestrange was not very strong.

"Don't say things you don't believe," Lucius said.

Narcissa had no response for that, so instead she leaned in to kiss Lucius, and then got up. "Come on. Draco looks ready for a nap."

***

"Okay, I have as much baby experience as the rest of you, but these two, when you put them together," Sirius announced, throwing the front door open and taking their parcels from them. Harry and Draco were in the living room, in the playpen, and had been screaming at one another for the last 15 minutes over a plushie dinosaur that squeaked when you squeezed it. Ready to tear his hair out (unable to satisfy either child), Sirius had left them to it and watched out the window for Lily and Narcissa to come back from shopping. "I take it away, they both cry, I give it to one and substitute, the other cries. They fight about the damn thing, and I cry. Help!"

Narcissa rolled her eyes and called, "Draco, dinosaurs are for common children."

It was more likely that the sound of his mother's voice than anything had distracted Draco, but whatever the case, the boy forgot the dinosaur and turned to face the sound.

"Mama!"

"Hi baby," Narcissa greeted him, breezing past Sirius and going to drop a kiss on Draco's forehead. Now that Draco didn't seem interested in the dinosaur anymore, Harry seemed to have lost his taste for it as well, and it hung from one of his hands as he stared up at Draco with a scowl.

" _Common children_ , she says," Lily laughed, scooping Harry up and planting a big kiss on his cheek. "Hullo, sweetums! Were you horrid and naughty for Uncle Sirius?"

"Sir's!" Harry squealed, fisting his little hands into his mother's shirt.

"You've got to learn to share, little man," Lily instructed before handing him to Sirius (who had laid the bags and such down) and saying. "But Mummy needs to pee. Torture Uncle Sirius for a moment more."

As soon as Lily was out of the room, Narcissa stepped closer to Sirius and whispered, "So you haven't told anyone, right? I don't want anything to happen to you, and you can't tell anyone, Sirius. Not even Remus."

Taken aback, Sirius furrowed his eyebrows as he bounced Harry on his hip. "No. I said I wouldn't, and I won't. Why are you asking? Has something else happened?"

"Not really," Narcissa replied with a sigh. "Nothing I shouldn't have expected. It's just... a little scary and I wanted to make sure."

Sirius sighed. "I feel like I'm in a coalition against the mafia, sometimes," he said thoughtfully. "I even had a dream where I sported a pinstriped fedora, and Remus kind of looked like Jessica Rabbit. But. Anyhow. You know what I mean."

"You... I don't want to know," Narcissa said, but couldn't help smiling just a little. "Jessica Rabbit, really? You are so weird. I can't believe we're related sometimes. And I'm sorry for getting you involved. I shouldn't have. It's just... easier to go through with you. You're the only family I actually trust, aside from Lucius of course."

"Remus would look smashing in a glittery red dress, I don't know what you're talking about," Sirius dismissed, setting a now wriggling Harry back in the playpen with Draco where they promptly started in over the dinosaur again. "One of them always has something that the other wants, have you noticed that?" Sirius asked, then shook his head. "Right, well, Cissa, I mean, you know you can trust me, right? And it's not an easy thing to go through by yourself, and I definitely know what's it's like to feel like no one gets what's going on with you, or has their own ideas about it... If you can't trust family, then who can you trust?"

"Lucius shot someone," Narcissa said softly, voice tight and quiet. Lily would be back any minute. "In the foot. And then threatened to shoot him in the head. He could go to jail for that. I want to get him out of it, Sirius. I don't want him involved with Vol de Mort anymore, but there's nothing I can do and he's there because of _me_."

"Christ," Sirius said, and would've said more, but Lily came back around the corner, eyes wide, jaw slightly opened. She'd come out of the loo, and heard Sirius and Narcissa talking, and couldn't help it. She took a leaf out of her husband's book and she eavesdropped.

"Lucius is working for Vol de Mort?" she asked quietly.

Narcissa swore in French (something she'd picked up on Sebastien's short visit for the wedding), and turned away from Lily, hoping Sirius could explain it away. He was better at that than she was anyway.

Sirius took a deep breath, but he couldn't do it. He ran a hand through his hair and looked between Narcissa and Lily; he was lost. "I don't. I. Well. Right."

"Oh, very helpful, thank you Sirius," Narcissa snapped. "Lucius is doing nothing that's any of your business, Lily. It is in your best interests to mind your own."

"Is it really?" Lily asked, raising an eyebrow. "Yes, because nothing concerning Riddle is of relevance to my family, including the vandalism, threatening post and slashed tires."

"Which is a right sight better than attempts on your _life_ , so leave it alone," Narcissa replied shortly.

"I'm pretty sure they go hand in hand, actually, or that they're leading up to some big, ominous master plan. He wants _Harry_ dead, did you know that?" Lily snapped. "Whatever reasoning has you justified in that bubble of yours, Narcissa, maybe it's time to realize that some of things that people do are _not_ justifiable!"

"Lily," Sirius said, putting a hand on her arm. "You've. You've got the wrong idea."

"Her husband is shooting people for Vol de Mort!" Lily said incredulously. "How do I know he's not smashing in Gideon's windshield too?"

Narcissa's petty anger over getting found out quickly mutated into something else, and she saw _red_. "My mistake. I seem to have been harbouring under the illusion that we were friends. Please strike from the record any comments on my behalf about my thoughts on your best interests." Before either of them could interrupt, Narcissa took a step towards Lily, eyes alight, and drew herself to her full height. "Even if you might think the worst of me and my husband, you ought to know Sirius well enough to know that since he obviously knew about it, there would be no way he would keep quiet if he even had the _slightest suspicion_ someone might be working against his friends. You have insulted me, you have insulted my husband, and you have insulted Sirius. Now I'll thank you to stop being a daft, nosy cow and apologize."

"I. Excuse me?" Lily spluttered. "The only accusations I recall making were against you keeping things from me when you know perfectly well what we're going through and that we're supposed to be _friends_!" The emotion was starting to well up; she hadn't been herself lately, between the hormones, and the stress, and everything else, and Narcissa essentially accusing her of accusing anyone of anything... Well she couldn't help it. She started to cry.

"No, actually, you accused Lucius of smashing in Gideon's windshield. And since you walked in on a conversation between Sirius and myself, that means Sirius knows about Lucius' activities, which means you were accusing him of keeping information like that from his friends," Narcissa replied, outwardly unmoved by Lily's tears, though her voice, while still cold, was less caustic. "I don't know what's going on in that little society of yours, but I'd assume Sirius keeping information like that would have some pretty big implications. Now this has absolutely nothing to do with you, and I've already told you to leave it alone."

"Narcissa, I don't think..." Sirius started, licking his lips. "You're putting words in her mouth. She's on edge. No one's in the right or wrong here, but don't you just think it's maybe easier to explain than to... I dunno. Cause bad feelings, or break up your friendship, or any other nonsense?"

"I'm sorry. I am," Lily said. "Just. I told you that this morning they smashed our kitchen door in with a sledgehammer, and they were already gone by the time we got downstairs. It's frightening to hear any mention of them. I overreacted."

"Yes. You did. And you should've given me the benefit of the doubt," Narcissa snapped, ignoring the issue of explaining altogether. "Just because I'm not one of your stupid, idealistic, do-good little freaks in that group you're both in doesn't mean I'm capable of... of lying through my teeth to all of you while I merrily plot against you."

"Time to turn the cruel metre down, Cissa," Sirius said.

"Oh, time to go bugger yourself, Sirius," Narcissa sniped back, but some of the tension visibly left her shoulders and she didn't quite look like she was just waiting for another chance to jump on Lily.

"You should write insults for a living," Sirius said dryly. "Are you going to tell her, then?"

"No, I don't think I shall," Narcissa replied loftily, picking a piece of lint off of her sleeve.

"Can I then?" Sirius asked. "Or shall we just say toss it, and go frolic in the meadow, putting the bad vibes behind us, hmm? I'm sure Harry and Draco would love to eat the grass."

"You don't have to," Lily said softly. "I trust you, Narcissa. And I trust Sirius. I would like to understand, it would put me at ease, but I'm not going to make you tell me something you don't want to share. I'll just put my faith in your judgement."

Narcissa sighed in annoyance. "Oh, right. Pull the trust card. Not that you're trying to guilt me into it or anything."

"I'm not pulling anything," Lily said. She was, of course, dying of curiosity and petrified at what she might be told all at once, but she was willing to let it go if it was better for Narcissa, and Sirius, and for everyone all around. "All I want in my life right now is reassurance, and I don't think that's to be had by any of us."

"It would make your life exponentially _less_ stable," Narcissa replied, her tone that of a warning. "Less sure, less _reassured_. It's better that you not know, and that you pretend the last few minutes didn't occur."

"Buggering shit, all this talk of trust and assurance and crap, crap, crap," Sirius said, rolling his eyes. "This isn't a soap, and it isn't a spy movie. Just tell her, for Christ's sake. If you don't then the two of you are never going to go back to normal and I'll end up smacking you both upside the head out of sheer frustration."

Narcissa took a deep breath. It annoyed her that Sirius was making light of it, as though it weren't something that would put both Lily and Narcissa's family in more danger. At the same time, however, he was right. There was hardly any point not telling her now.

"I walked in on Riddle shooting someone. He tried to kill me, too, but Bellatrix got me out. Lucius works for Vol de Mort now because it's the only way I was allowed to live. It's all very dramatic and if you tell anyone, you could get Lucius, myself, Draco, or Sirius killed. Perhaps all of the above. So you'd best keep your pretty little mouth shut."

"I. _Cissa_ ," Lily breathed, putting a shocked hand to her chest.

"Yes, well," Narcissa said, waving a hand dismissively through the air. It was easier this time to pretend it wasn't a big deal. "That is why I didn't want to tell you."

Lily closed the distance between the two of them, and then pulled Narcissa into a hug without a word.

"Lily, honestly. You're an emotional basket case," Narcissa said, still trying to play it down, but when Lily's arms just tightened around her, Narcissa tentatively returned the embrace. "You're making a spectacle of yourself, you know that."

"And who's judging me other than you, Sirius and the children? Sirius and the children both try and put their feet in their mouths, and it's my living room anyhow, so I think I'll make all the spectacle I want. Cissa, that's _horrible_. You have to tell the police!"

"Oh, yes," Narcissa replied, rolling her eyes. "I'll just take all of the proof I have packaged away at home and explain the situation fully. You're right, it's fool proof. What _ever_ have I been waiting for."

"The sarcasm is really wearing me thin," Lily said. " _Really_. But there has to be some way to end this, doesn't there? He's harassing us, nearly killed you, and he's essentially enslaved your husband."

"Actually, that was Bellatrix's idea," Narcissa replied. "And no, there is no way. There are too many people I'm not willing to lose."

"What a mess, what a mess," Lily said sadly. "That mad old loon is making mules of us all." Looking at Sirius she added, "You know, Molly Weasley might think our hellion offspring'll have us grey before we're thirty, but at this rate I think I'll be lucky to see my son grow up at all."

"Don't say shit like that, Lily," Sirius said. "He's out of his tree, sure, but I don't think that even Riddle is daft enough to off us all."

"Can we all not be so depressing, please," Narcissa said, and then scooped Draco out of the play pen. "I have to get home. Our new cook is over-trained and under-talented, and I must have a word before he begins dinner. Honestly, the whole tabloid lark is really doing a number on my staff. Ta for now."

Pausing, Narcissa frowned. "Bother, no driver today. Sirius, be a dear and bring my packages out to the car for me?"

"Yes ma'am," Sirius said with a small smile, and gave Lily what he hoped was a reassuring kiss on the cheek before collecting Narcissa's things and making for the door.

"Bye!" Harry called loudly from the playpen, bouncing and waving.

"Bye bye bye bye," Draco returned. "Bye!"

***

Narcissa needed a pick up. She'd gotten home, lectured the cook, put away her shopping, and was now flipping through the most recently published shoot she'd done while Draco played with his toy cars, driving them all over the floor and making vroom-vroom noises.

Narcissa watched him with one eye and the magazine with the other, and she couldn't help but admire how completely _fantastic_ she looked in it. She was probably the most striking model in the whole magazine. Even after putting the word out via her publicist that she would be doing no more modelling for a while, she still got calls at least every week from various designers or magazines or even companies wanting her to do commercials. It was depressing, because she so missed it, being paid to be beautiful.

Dropping the magazine listlessly onto the floor, Narcissa sighed. It had been an exhausting day for a Saturday, emotionally at least, and Narcissa felt like doing something _fun_.

Smiling to herself, she picked up the phone and called the telephone directory. Sirius had said Remus was working today.

"Connect me to the Salcombe Public Library. Thank you."

***

"Hello, snuggle muffin!" Sirius exclaimed through half of a hamburger, grinning at Remus as he came through the door. There was ketchup on Sirius' chin, and he wiped it away with the back of his arm, and then frowned at the look on Remus' face. "You all right?" he asked, after he'd swallowed the rest of the sandwich. "You don't have a paper to write or something, do you? Because I can make myself scarce."

"No, no paper. I'm paper free," Remus replied, and then dug into his pocket before sitting down across from Sirius, smiling and looking confused at the same time. "Well. Actually. Except for this paper. It's a message someone left for me at work. You'd never believe what it says."

"No, I suppose I would," Sirius said, raising his eyebrows. "Ooh, did we finally get a threat on our lives?"

"Definitely not," Remus replied, smile widening. "It's from Narcissa. Let me read it to you. Quote. Remus, your boyfriend had a dream about you being Jessica Rabbit. Thought you ought to know. Best, Narcissa. End quote."

Sirius was sure whether to laugh or apologize. He settled on trying not to laugh as he said, "Well. Ha! I did, that imp. She gets her kicks from dirty tricks."

"You did? You actually did?" Remus asked, shaking his head. "I have no idea what my boss must think of me now. Care to explain, Sirius?"

Sirius shrugged, but he was grinning. "It was a mafia dream. I was a hit man, with a fedora, and mad shoulder pads, and you, for some reason, were dressed like Jessica Rabbit. Red dress, high heels, the whole shebang."

"Breasts? A _cartoon woman_? What did you eat before bed _that_ night," Remus asked, shaking his head. "A red dress and high heels, how ridiculous."

"It was kind of hot, actually," Sirius said, waggling his eyebrows. "And that was that night we had sushi and then got a little drunk remember? I also had a dream about riding a talking vacuum cleaner, but that's not really here nor there."

"Oh was it," Remus laughed, incredulous. "How exactly was it hot? Because I was in a dress? Or because I was a woman?"

Sirius felt his cheeks burn red. "Hey now," he said, a little defensive, but still playful. "It was all _you_ , baby. And I think it might've been the heels. You've got good legs for heels."

"Have I?" Remus asked, quirking an eyebrow and trying hard not to laugh. It was all utterly ridiculous. "And how would you know, exactly? Is that a fantasy you've spent a lot of time indulging in your head?"

Embarrassed, Sirius said, "Maybe. A few times."

Shocked, Remus paused for a moment, and then actually did laugh. "Are you quite serious? You could have asked, you know."

"I figured you'd laugh at me," Sirius said. "Like you're doing now, for example."

"Oh, come on. It is a little bit funny," Remus said. "Especially since you've now fairly convinced all of our friends that I'm the kinky one of the two of us."

"I'm allowed a fetish or two," Sirius said. "Mr Likes to Shag in Public Places."

"I do not!" Remus protested.

"Do too," Sirius retorted childishly. "On the balcony, in the alley behind the bar, in the park, _twice_ , at pretty much all of our friends' houses, every wedding we've ever been to together..."

"Okay, okay," Remus laughed. "I get it. And I give in. You've indulged what you apparently decree to be _my_ fetish, I suppose it's only fair I indulge yours."

Sirius blinked. "Are you... serious?"

"Of course I am," Remus said, getting up and moving to the other side of the table, bending to kiss Sirius. "But you have to get the stuff together because _I_ am certainly not."

"Actually, I have..." Sirius started, trailing off before getting up and going over to the storage closet. Rumbling around for a minute he eventually yelled, "Aha!" and pulled out a pair of black, high-healed, vinyl shoes. "From Hallowe'en, second year, when James and I dressed like hookers, remember?"

"You... now. Now?" Remus asked, following Sirius into the bedroom. "You want me to do it now."

"Well you don't have to," Sirius said, handing Remus the shoes. "It's just a silly thing, Moony. I mean, you don't have to if you don't want to."

"No, it's... I don't mind," Remus replied, smiling a little. "So long as you don't tell anyone. I can't believe you keep women's shoes in your closet. Do you wear them ever, Sirius?"

"Why?" Sirius teased back. "Want me to wear them instead?"

"It isn't my kink," Remus replied, taking the shoes and stepping close to Sirius and grinning. "Just wondering if I've been dating a crossdresser without knowing it."

"Trust me, if I was a crossdresser, you'd know it," Sirius grinned back. "I like the look of lady's knickers, for the record, but I can't imagine they'd be even remotely comfortable around my manly areas."

"I can't _believe_ you've never told me this before," Remus said and dropped the shoes to the floor to pull off his jumper.

"Well it's not really something you bring up in everyday conversation," Sirius said, sitting on the bed and watching Remus nervously. "Pass the salt, dear. Could you wear women's heels for me in bed? Oh, and the phone bill came today."

Jumper off, Remus began unbuttoning his shirt, still grinning at Sirius. It just seemed unbelievable to him that Sirius, who always made fun of frumpy Remus for being a 'minx' was the one with the weird fetish after all. "You know, you kind of look scared."

"I half keep expecting you to tell me that it's too screwed up and you won't do it," Sirius said. "It's really weird, isn't it?"

"I don't know. I think in comparison with other fetishes, it's not too weird," Remus said conversationally as he dropped his shirt to the floor and began on his belt. "I mean, some people are into all sorts of crazy things. Bondage. Sadomasochism. Dominant and submissive role-playing. Those count as fetishes, right? Or, even if they don't, there're things like foot fetishes, or strangulation fetishes, or... latex fetishes. I've even read about electrophilia, which is a fetish for electricity. So really, you know, ladies shoes... not that weird."

"Remus," Sirius said, licking his lips. "You're naked."

"Oh, yes. Well," Remus said, smiling. "I figured if I was going to wear ladies shoes, I couldn't exactly wear them with my work clothes."

Deciding not to comment on how _obviously_ excited Sirius was, Remus just positioned the shoes with his feet, balanced himself against the wall, and then stepped into them, feeling a little silly standing there naked in high heels.

"So. What now?"

Sirius felt like he was about to explode. "That's. That's really..." he started, and pulled his shirt over his head. "You. Hot."

Remus chuckled, the sound coming out a little nervous and a little relieved. He stepped away from the wall and walked slowly towards the bed. "I feel a little silly, I will admit. But at least these shoes aren't as hard to walk in as I thought they'd be."

Sirius unbuttoned his trousers and shimmied them onto the floor before grabbing Remus at the hips and tugging him into his lap. Sirius' very obvious arousal pressed into Remus' thigh. " _Guh_ ," Sirius said, and then brought Remus' lips to his own.

Remus laughed into Sirius' mouth, pushing him back on the bed and then moving to straddle him. "This is really turning you on, isn't it?"

Sirius nodded, blushing, running his hands over Remus' legs, still very self-conscious over the fact that Remus in heels was doing so much for him.

"For goodness sakes, stop blushing," Remus said, grinding down into Sirius' groin and then leaning in so he could whisper in Sirius' ear. "I already know you aren't shy. Do whatever you want."

Sirius bit Remus' shoulder gently, pushing one hand into Remus' hair and resting the other on one of his arse cheeks. His lower-body arched into Remus'. "No bird ever did this for me," he murmured, sucking on Remus' earlobe. "And none of them would've looked so good as you doing it, either."

That gave Remus a reason to pause. He pulled minimally away from Sirius, just enough to look triumphantly into his eyes. "I'm first. I'm first at this."

Sirius nodded slowly, and said, "Yeah. Um. Why?"

"Nothing. Don't worry about it," Remus breathed. "I guess I'll just have to make it memorable, that's all."

Sirius grinned. "In that case. Uh. Could you. P-Pose? For me?"

"Pose how," Remus asked, smiling and rolling off of Sirius to prop himself up on one arm.

"I. You. However, you know..." Sirius said, sitting up slightly. "Showing off, uh. The shoes."

Remus laughed and rolled again to lay on his stomach, bending his legs until the heels touched the small of his back and he turned his face to look at Sirius, cheeks red. "How's this?"

" _Naugh_ ," Sirius said softly, his mouth going dry as he grabbed one of Remus' feet at the ankle and started kissing his legs.

Remus breathed in at the sensation, and then breathed out, laughing airily. "God, I love you."

"Mmmm, love you," Sirius said, still kissing. "Sexy."


	31. All I Ever Wanted (September 12th-21st, 2007)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Where there is a proposal, two grooms, and a serious lack of service.

"If you can afford a cup of coffee a day, than you can afford life insurance!" the telly announced loudly.

For some reason, this pulled Remus' attention from his book, and he focussed on all the happy couples, old and young, the commercial showed.

His hand toying idly with the dark hair beneath his hands, Remus was already dividing his attention between the television, his reading for next week, and his boyfriend, but now his thoughts ran off on a tangent too. He'd never really considered it before, but all of their friends were paired up and married off, or at least had some sort of stability, despite how young they were. James and Lily had a kid, even, and another on the way; Gideon and Marlene had eloped; it was obvious Dorcas and Edgar were in it for the long haul if they'd made up after the fiasco a few months back; and even Hestia and Aidan were engaged, Remus had found out recently. He and Sirius had been together for a while now, and planned on staying that way, but they'd never talked about the details that went into a term like 'forever'.

It made Remus a little sad that he and Sirius and Fabian and Caradoc had no similar plans. Why should they be any different than their other friends? They were in love just the same. They lived together and they slept together and they did laundry together and they grocery shopped together. They put just as much effort into their relationships as anyone else.

Stilling the hand in Sirius' hair and setting down his book, Remus looked down at Sirius' profile in Remus' lap where he still faced the telly, and said, "I think we should get married."

Sirius looked up at Remus at an awkward angle, surprised and taken off-guard, shaking himself back to reality; he'd been completely engrossed in the nothing he was watching on the telly, and in how comfortable he was just lying there, completely vegged out. "What?" he asked.

"I think we should get married," Remus said again, feeling suddenly apprehensive. Maybe Sirius had never brought it up for a reason. "I mean, why shouldn't we? We love each other. We want to be together forever. We live together, and we share finances and bills."

"Well, I..." Sirius started, rolling onto his back and shifting so he could look up at Remus properly. "That's all marriage is though, isn't it? Money, and a home together, and well, kids and that sort of thing. We're already doing that, mostly, and I'd assumed planning for the rest eventually. What difference does a piece of paper and two rings make?" Sirius' was wary of the term 'marriage'. He'd thought about it before, sure, but was afraid that getting married, for Sirius, would lead to him becoming exactly what he'd been fighting against for his entire life: his parents.

"Security," Remus answered slowly. "Symbols are important, yeah, but it's the whole... security aspect. I mean, if something happened to one of us, everything would automatically go to the next of kin, since we're not technically spouses. We could go the route of just relying on legal wills, but. I don't know. I always thought I'd get married."

"You always thought you'd get married?" Sirius asked. "Why, though? Because it's what grown-ups do? Or. I mean. I dunno."

Remus just looked at Sirius for a moment, a little shocked. It was obvious that not only had Sirius never really thought about it, but that he didn't really care for the idea. "Because that's what people do when they fall in love. They get married. If you don't want to, we don't have to. I'm not going to leave you or anything, obviously. I just... I don't know. I think it's important."

"It's not that I don't think it's important," Sirius said, defensive, moving to sit up. "It's been drilled into my head since I was old enough to understand, under the most basic of definitions, what marriage was. But Mother and Father... well. Let's just say they weren't the greatest of role models in that department."

"It wouldn't be about them. It'd be about us," Remus said, voice gentle. Any time there was any mention of Sirius' parents, the conversation immediately populated itself with landmines. Family was a touchy subject when one was disowned, and Remus could understand that and try to be sensitive. "And you're so different from your parents, the idea of you ever having to look to the examples they provided you with is laughable, you know that."

"I'm not entirely unlike them," Sirius said. "The Blacks... you've seen what they do. They yell, and hit, and fuck around. They're selfish. They get divorced. I mean, did you know that once upon a time, when my father went to East Portlemouth, he was popular, and admired, and known as a _nice guy_? Now look at him. He barely talks anymore, and Mother has screamed him into submission, like he's her flying monkey. And when Reg and I were growing up, he'd smack us around on her command. I mean. I just don't want to end up like that. I don't want to force you into someone you'd never want to be."

"You're wrong. You _are_ entirely unlike them," Remus said firmly. "You're a much better person than either of them ever were." Pausing, Remus reached out and put a hand on Sirius' side. "Yeah, maybe you're a little rough around the edges sometimes, Sirius, but you're a good person. One of the best people I've ever known. And anyway, by your own reasoning, if we're going to live as if we're married anyway, what's the difference if there're a few rings and a piece of paper added to the mix?"

"Are you proposing?" Sirius asked, smiling slightly.

"If I am, I'm doing a shoddy job of it. I haven't got a ring for you," Remus said apologetically. "If you don't mind that, though, than I suppose you could call it that. I want to marry you, Sirius, if you'll deign to settle down on my account."

Sirius couldn't help but snort. "I think I've already settled down on your account, actually."

"So it's just the details we need to take care of," Remus said, smiling. This was probably one of the most unromantic proposals ever. "So will you marry me, than? Properly, with a ceremony and everything?"

"You're such a romantic, Remus Lupin," Sirius said, grinning now. "But yeah. Yeah, okay."

Remus smiled and leaned forward, kissing Sirius chastely on the lips. "Thank you for indulging my romanticism. Now I have to get away from all these distractions. I still have twelve pages to read, and then I have to take notes."

"You're the one who brought it up," Sirius said, laying back down and turning towards the telly. "Hey, does this mean I call you my fiancé now? And that you'll be my husband? And are you going to set a date, and plan table settings and archways? Ooh! Which one of us gets the veil?"

"Yes, yes, not now, and neither because we aren't girls," Remus replied with a smile, picking up his book again. If he started on the details, he knew he’d never stop, and he _really_ had to get his readings done. "Now we're done talking about it. I have homework."

"Fine, fine," Sirius caved, knowing that Remus would never get anything done if he kept up his teasing. It wasn't long before he was absorbed in the telly again, and Remus was involved in his homework, and they were back where they started before marriage had even been brought up.

***

"When you said 'Let's get married', I didn't think you meant next week," Sirius said, climbing off of the bike and pulling off his helmet. 

"What's the point in waiting? We don't want a big fancy do like Narcissa. Not only would it be a waste of money, we'd both just feel awkward about it. Neither of us are the showy type," Remus said, and then paused contemplatively as he climbed off after Sirius. "Okay, well, you are about some things. But I mean, you hardly even wanted to get married. I didn't think you'd be interested in a big wedding. I'm not trying to rush anything. Does it feel rushed?"

"I never said that," Sirius answered. "I'm just surprised is all. You don't, as a rule, spontaneously decide to do things. You plan things. You think them through and analyze them and rewrite them several times."

"I did. A week is enough time to do that," Remus replied, smiling as he pulled the helmet off. "It's every second line of my notes this week. Now come on. James and Lily are already sitting. I can see her hair. How do you think they'll react?"

Sirius shrugged. "I dunno. They'll probably be surprised. Hopefully James doesn't react the way I did when he told us about Lily being pregnant with Harry."

"They'd better react better than that. You were an insensitive prat and you just about made Prongs cry," Remus teased as they stepped into the cafe and made their way to the table James and Lily were seated at. "Hello. How are you both?"

"Not too shabby," Lily answered, grinning up at the two of them expectantly. "Harry is at his grandparent's house, as per your orders, and we're here, and we're dressed nicely, although James did put up a fight when I forced a tie on him on his day off. You better have something worthwhile planned for this surprise, because these pantyhose are making my legs itch."

Remus just smiled widely, but didn't say anything. He thought he'd let Sirius tell them. Sirius liked shocking people, and he'd enjoy it.

"Well? Come on, come on. What's the big secret?" James asked impatiently. "I don't have all day, you know. Oh, wait, I do. because it's my day off and I'm here wearing a tie for you two. So spill it."

Flopping down into a free chair, Sirius mock-complained, "God. Can't ask anything of you two, can we? I don't think that putting on freshly pressed clothes for mine and Remus' wedding is really _that_ trying, is it?" 

Lily blinked. "Yours and Remus'... _what_?"

"We got our marriage license yesterday. We thought we'd go to the courthouse today," Remus said, smiling at the matching expressions of shock. "What do you say? Will you two stand up for us? Be our witnesses?"

James grinned widely and waggled his eyebrows in an expression of exaggerated lewdness. "Fuck yeah. I've witnessed enough from you two over the years that I can definitely attest to your, uh, _love_."

"You're pulling a Gideon and Marlene," Lily said. "And James and I are your Fabian and Caradoc. Shame, though, as I doubt there are many trannies at the courthouse. Goodness! What prompted this decision?" 

"I dunno. Ask him," Sirius said, gesturing to Remus. "He did the proposing." 

"Really?" James snorted. "Remus suggested it?"

"Yeah," Remus answered, blushing a little. "I just thought it was important."

"It's very important," Lily agreed. "Our group are ridiculous, you know? We're all going to be married before we're 25. Hestia and Aidan set a date, by the way. June 21. They're not wasting any time, are they?" 

"Ed's planning on popping the question, he just hasn't decided how or when yet," Sirius commented. "But he's got the ring, anyhow." 

"For all our teenage rebellion, we sure accepted normality easily enough," Remus mused. "Though, I suppose I ought not say so around Dorcas."

"Shut up talking about other people. Even if you guys aren't making a big deal out of it, this is your wedding day," James said loudly. "Let's order. Get whatever you want. Lily and I are treating. It's not too early for alcohol, right, considering it's a special occasion?"

"Killjoy," Sirius complained, but he was smiling, and he squeezed Remus' thigh under the table. 

"You two are adorable," Lily gushed. "Mr and Mr... Lupin-Black? Black-Lupin? How would you address that on a envelope?" 

"Oh, well. We've actually decided to keep our names," Remus said. "I mean, we thought about hyphenation, but in the end decided against it. Though, there is this new trend of combining names instead of taking one or the other, but that seems a bit too cosmopolitan for me. Besides, what would we choose? Blupin? Lack? Certainly not."

James snickered. "You spent ages covering your schoolbooks in all the variations though, didn't you? I bet there are little hearts everywhere with every possible form of you plus Sirius written in them. You're such a girl."

"Shut up, you," Sirius said. "Filch probably had to coat the wall by your bed in ten coats of paint to cover up all the 'JP + LE' s and the hearts and your sad excuse for manhood." 

"What if you have children, though?" Lily asked thoughtfully, ignoring Sirius. "Providing you want to, obviously." 

"Black-Lupin," Remus replied promptly, smiling and ignoring James and Sirius' comments. "Alphabetical hyphenation. Fair and inclusive."

"So you are planning on them, then?" Lily questioned. "How many? When? _How_ , exactly? Adoption?" 

"Down girl," Sirius said. "James, your wife is a nosey parker." 

"Just pretend they're not here. My wife and your wife will go off into Remus and Lily Land and talk about girly things and we can be men and punch each other in the shoulder to congratulate, that's me, and to bond, that's you," James said with a smile, waving his hand through the air dismissively. "Mate, can you really believe _you're_ getting married?"

Remus rolled his eyes at James' words, but then turned his attention back to Lily. "I don't know, really. We'd both like to. Did I ever tell you we got in a row about it at the hospital the day Harry was born?"

"I can't wait until Reg tells Mother," Sirius said gleefully. "He's on speaking terms with her now that he's living in London, believe it or not. Bigger bloke than I am." 

"Did you really?" Lily asked Remus. "Can't say I would've known, I was a bit preoccupied at the time. What sort or row, specifically?" 

"Reg always was oddly attached to your parents, though. Does he still have some weird notion about being a real family?" James asked, pulling a face. "But at least he's independent and whatnot now, and he's got you to thank for that."

"It came up, not surprisingly considering the situation, and I refused to think about it because I apparently thought Sirius would rather have kids with a bird than with me," Remus answered casually. "You know how I can be. Anyway, you can imagine that didn't go over well."

"Hey, you know, this place has really bad service," James commented suddenly, effectively stopping the two separate conversations that were going on as he looked around for a waiter. "So we want liquor, yeah? Something to toast with anyway. We need to celebrate."


	32. I've Been Down (September 27th, 2007)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Where there is friendly catching up, irrational confrontation, and a serious lack of resolution.

Gideon was having trouble breathing, and wiped the tears of laughter away with the palm of one hand as he handed Leroy another picture with the other. "O-oh, _Christ_ ," he wheezed, glancing at the picture again and promptly bursting into another fit of laughter. Amidst his chortles and other sounds, the words, 'bride', 'lacy' and 'garter' could be heard as breathy exclamations.

He and Marlene were in London on Emmeline and Leroy's invitation. The band was on a show break until just before Halloween, but rather than return to Salcombe, the Hobbled Gordons (and Emmeline by extension) were sticking around London and just enjoying a sort of vacation of their own, although they still had to do various promotional gigs like radio shows and talk show appearances. While it was nice to travel with the band and play all sorts of difference places, it was equally nice to just enjoy the city for what it was. Emmeline and Leroy had only been back to Salcombe twice since Gideon and Marlene's impromptu wedding, and had instead pestered the two of them to take a belated honeymoon and come visit the city until they'd gotten sick of the answering machine messages and booked a week off.

"Oh _my_ ," Emmeline laughed, leaning into Leroy as they both chuckled. It seems their friends had gotten both Sirius and Remus completely pissed at their wedding party, and had then dressed the pair up in sexy white dresses with frilly little skirts and garters, thigh highs, ladies pants, suspenders, stuffed bras, and all of it, and then taking many, _many_ pictures. It was quite the sight, to say the least. "I don't think I've ever seen Remus this drunk. Is he even conscious?"

"Barely," Marlene managed, between her own all-encompassing laughter. "Oh hell, you should've seen him. I'd never seen him that wasted either. He was stumbling all over and saying the most obscene things. I wish we'd thought to film it. He was so embarrassed in the morning. Oh, shit man. You guys should've come in."

"Wish we could have, but we had filming that day for the second single. Which we might have to do over anyway, since Stubby hates what we've seen of the video so far," Emmeline said, rolling her eyes.

"Stubby hates everything we do," Leroy said, relatively indifferent. "There's no pleasing him, so I don't know why we bother half the time. And the way he's been treating Ben lately..." Leroy trailed off sighing. "If it wasn't for the publicity we're all getting individually, I think he would've quit long ago. Ben figures it's better to get his foot in the door as the established sort, before the Gordon's are six feet under. Which is inevitable."

"How's he been treating Ben?" Gideon asked, a little surprised. He knew Stubby could be cruel, but he didn't think he was cruel enough to _totally_ alienate his own band members.

Leroy smiled slightly despite himself. "Well. We figure he's throwing all the anger over you two getting married on Ben, since he mentioned the article first. Em might've read it, but Stubby isn't completely stupid. If he said a word to her the way he talks to Ben, I'd pummel the shit out of him. Ben just tells us to stay the fuck out of it."

"Are you kidding?" Gideon asked, expression incredulous. "That was in _May_."

"Ben's tougher than anyone gives him credit for, though," Emmeline commented. "He doesn't let it get to him, and he doesn't let Stubby get away with too much. Stubby ought to be careful, though. I think Ben's just waiting for the chance to hit him."

"Now _that_ I'd like to see," Marlene said, rolling her eyes. "I doubt anyone can punch hard enough to pop a hole in that stupid, inflated ego of his, or to dent his bubble of conceit. Honestly. He needs to get over it, and stop saying shit about me in interviews. I know I'm in a bathing suit 32 hours a week, but that doesn't mean I enjoy having paparazzi snap pictures at work and plaster them all over the stupid gossip rags."

"You've gotten some pretty inventive titles, though," Emmeline smiled, and reached for her scrapbook of articles, flipping it open to a recent page. "The Muse who Snubbed Stubby Boardman. I like that one."

"I hadn't read that one. It explains a couple weird emails I got, though. Musicians who wanted to meet me and such," Marlene said, grinning.

"Not to mention that bloke who showed up at the door with a guitar on his back. We were at work and Molly didn't have the heart not to give him a bit of pudding," Gideon said. "What was it he said? That he wanted to learn the true meaning of rejection, or some such codswallop?"

"Something like that. I helped him with the whole rejection thing when I got home from work," Marlene said. "I laughed myself sick, and then felt bad and let him take a polaroid of me. For inspiration, he said." She'd also written on the back of it, something about not looking to other people to inspire him, but working on figuring out what it is he wants to inspire in others. It had been a little sappy for Marlene (except the part about her suggesting he cut out the creepy stalker shit before it got him into trouble), but it seemed to do the trick and he'd been smiling when he'd left.

Emmeline giggled. "You're becoming a celebrity of sorts yourself, aren't you? Are you going to give in an do any interviews? Or do you like the way they've dubbed you a mysterious heartbreaker?"

"I don't care what they call me. I'm not doing interviews because I don't want to feed this ridiculous hype Stubby seems to think he's building by telling the world about me," Marlene said, rolling her eyes. "I'm just not interested in talking about it."

"How grounded of you," Em quipped. "Glad to see you're getting your spine back. You were a bit of a pushover when you were with Stubby, you know. Or at least, you let him walk all over you."

"I wouldn't be able to put up with her like that," Gideon teased, grinning. "If we didn't scream at one another occasionally, I think I'd file for divorce."

Leroy surveyed the last of the pictures of Remus and Sirius (Sirius holding Remus princess style as Remus threw a bouquet of garden weeds at Dorcas and Edgar, who we laughing beside them), he said, "Seems like everyone and their mum is getting married now, doesn't it?"

Emmeline grinned at him. She didn't feel like they were missing out on anything by not getting married. There was too much going on in their lives right now to plan a wedding anyway, and she still wanted to wait until she was a little older and a little more settled anyway. A wedding was the sort of thing she wanted to enjoy. "We can be the odd pair out then."

Leroy laughed. "I'm certainly in no hurry," he said. "I'm just completely surprised. When we were growing up, I thought that the lot of us were doomed to be alone forever because we were too ridiculous to put up with." Then, pausing, he surveyed Gideon and Marlene thoughtfully and added, "Except maybe you two. I think most of us, least the ones that knew about the two of you, were certain you were in it for the long haul. Knocked us on our arses when you broke up the first time."

Gideon couldn't help but sling a comfortable arm around his wife's shoulders. "I just feel old. Marlene used to baby sit Sirius and James for Christ's sake, and now look at the two of them. Both married off, and one of them has a kid and another on the way."

"Shut up. I don't want to think about aging. I have wrinkles. Did you notice? Right there, from where my eyes crinkle when I laugh," Marlene said, faux-dramatically. "If you love me at all, you'll hurry up and start making me miserable so they don't get any deeper."

"Than you'll just get frown lines," Emmeline pointed out.

"I think the laugh lines suit you," Gideon said with a shrug. "Least you're not like Arthur. He stands in front of the hallway mirror and _searches_ for the grays on his receding head. You'd think he'd want to hang on to what little he has left, but nope, he plucks the damn things right out."

A door slammed in the hallway outside the door, and the four of them turned their heads at the sound, quirking eyebrows as heavy boots thumped on the floor amid whispered conversation, all the while coming closer to them.

"Shit," Leroy muttered, just as there was a hard banging on the door and Stubby yelled through the wood.

"Let me the fuck in you unbelievable little _shits_ ," he snapped. "I have fucking _congratulations_ to pass on to Mr and Mrs _Prewett_."

"Christ, Stubby," Ben voice said from the hallway, quiet and muffled.

"There's no other door, is there?" Marlene asked with a sigh. "Shit. Okay, I'll get it."

"I'm not sure if that's a good idea," Emmeline said, frowning.

"He's not going to hit me, and he's here to yell at Gideon and I. Might as well get it over with and hope he doesn't get his hands on my husband," Marlene said, shrugging and moving to the door. She opened it just as the second round of pounding started, and put her foot behind it so Stubby couldn't open it any more. "Yes?"

"Wotcher, _bitch_ ," Stubby said, his voice scathing as he forced the door open more, causing Marlene to stumble back. Quickly closing the distance between them, he roughly tugged her into him and pressed his lips to hers.

Gideon growled, and was across the room and standing beside his wife just as she forced Stubby off of her.

"What the _fuck_ , Stubby!" Marlene snapped, wiping her mouth off and stepping into Gideon, making sure to keep herself between the two men. "What the fuck was _that_?"

"I'm sorry, shit, I'm sorry," Ben said, stepping into the room and shutting the door behind him, moving to stand near Stubby, just in case he had to step in. "I didn't know he was listening. I just mentioned it to Dale when he asked if anything was going on tonight. I should've checked..."

"It's not your fault," Emmeline said, and she meant it. Ben only ever meant well.

"It's not your fault Stubby is as big a git as they come," Gideon said, grinding his teeth angrily, his hands curled into fists. "What the hell are you _playing at_ , Boardman?"

"Well, last time I checked, _Prewett_ , your wife was still my girlfriend," Stubby snarled, licking his lips.

"Are you completely delusional?" Marlene snapped. "You didn't talk to me for _weeks_ when I told you I wasn't going on tour with you. That constitutes a break up. You can't treat someone like that and expect them to hang around waiting for you."

" _Can't treat anyone like that_?" Stubby questioned, a malicious grin on his face, his tone toxic. "Oh, _Kinny_ , you mean how you were _fucking_ Prewett there before the God damn tour even started? You two _re-kindled_ your fucking _romance_? That is the soppiest pile of horseshit I've ever heard in my life, and I watched the two of you drool over one another all through high school."

"Stubby," Leroy said warningly, in the background, standing off and behind Gideon and Marlene. "Man, don't make this worse. It's over and done with."

"Shut the fuck up, Roy," Stubby answered. "You fucking invited them here, right under my nose, when you know perfectly well what lying, _cheating_ , worthless pricks they are."

"Stubby Boardman," Emmeline said, her voice clipped. "You're not welcome in our room if you can't be a grown up and let go of your bruised pride."

"Nice try, Em, but let me translate that to Stubby Language," Ben said, smiling a little, and then turning to face Stubby. "You were an asshole, and you got ditched on account of it. Don't blame other people for that. Just accept it and move on, man. Gideon's one of your oldest friends."

"Friend? Gideon Prewett?" Stubby questioned, and let out a short, amused laughed. "Gideon Prewett and I haven't been on what I'd call friendly terms since he went behind my back and shagged Marlene when we were 15!"

Gideon rolled his eyes. "You're unbelievable!" he said. "We're _twenty-seven_ , Stubby. That was more than a fucking decade ago. Shouldn't we be past petty bullshit like that? Christ. We both liked her at the time. Even Leroy and the other blokes _liked her at the time_ , but no one claimed her! She was no one's property. And besides that, you were pretty fucking quick to try and jump your way into her knickers after we broke up the first time!"

"Like it's my fault you were too sodding stupid to hold onto her?" Stubby asked. "Like I gave even a tiny shit about you at that point, Gideon, so don't even _try_ to lay a guilt trip on me. You talked her into shagging you again, and leaving me, and you were even ruddy shitheaded enough to try and do it right in front of my face at fucking Potter's wedding!"

"Oh _come on_ , Stubby!" Marlene finally snapped. "Who are you kidding? You didn't care about me. You _don't_ care about me. You wanted me, sure, maybe because I was the only girl in our little group and you wanted to be the guy who won, but you didn't care, not really. Even now you're just sniping with Gideon about who did what. Do you even miss me? Do you?"

"You were my muse, _baby_ ," Stubby purred, laying it on and sending his best, most charming smile in Marlene's direction. "You can't tell me that _you_ don't miss _me_."

"Jesus Christ," Gideon said, and couldn't help but laugh.

Stubby's eyes narrowed and he glared at Gideon wordlessly.

"What?" Gideon asked. "You think you're going to smile and flutter your eye lashes and she's going to go, 'Whoops! Sorry Gid!' and run off with you? You only want her to rub in my face, and certainly not because you love her, or care about her. You proved that much by abusing the shit out of her for the entire time you were together."

"I didn't lay a hand on her," Stubby said.

"I never said you did," Gideon replied. "But you used her, and made her feel guilty, and sucked the happiness out of her."

"Oh that is such bullshit," Stubby spat, crossing his arms and raising an eyebrow at Marlene as if to say, _Tell him the truth, baby_.

"Yeah. I'm with him," Marlene said, gesturing to Gideon, enjoying the double meaning. Her slight smirk disappeared though, and she sighed, taking a step closer to Stubby and putting a hand on his forearm where it crossed over his chest. "Stubby, look. You're not a bad guy, okay? Or at least you never used to be. I think maybe a long time ago, you did used to care about me. But then the stupid rivalry with Gideon started, and your obsession with your music, and you got all these stupid, big ideas about yourself, and somewhere along the way you forgot how to care about other people, and ever since you started doing drugs, it's just multiplied by a thousand. You're not even the kind of person I'd be friends with anymore, let alone date. You have a lot of shit to figure out before you're going to be okay. Do you know what I'm saying?"

Stubby swallowed, didn't quite meet her eyes, and pushed her hand away. "There's not a fucking thing wrong with me," he said, but his voice was trembling. "I just grew up. We did. Everyone did."

Everyone was silent after that, admiring the cross of simplicity and insanity laced in Stubby's statement. It was so wrong to hear from Stubby's mouth, but at the same time, so true. Breaking the quiet, Gideon awkwardly held out his hand for Stubby to shake and said, "Mate. Really. We. It's done. We _are_ grown up. We have to get over this. Marlene's my wife now and that's... it's not going to change."

Stubby spat on Gideon's hand and said, "Don't count on it."

"Stubby, come on, man," Ben sighed, rubbing a hand over his face as Gideon made a disgusted face at his saliva covered hand.

"You're not an adult, Stubby. We grew up. You're just a guy with a drug problem, a superiority complex, and abandonment issues," Marlene said, and though her words were harsh, her voice was tentative. She felt a little bad for Stubby, now that she saw him. He was obviously a mess. It was probably great for his rock star image, but she was worried about him. He'd already OD'd once. "You're high right now, aren't you? You're such a bloody idiot. Stubby, come _on_. You can be better than this."

Emmeline looked down, away from Stubby. This suddenly felt like a very personal moment between Marlene and Stubby. Obviously the two did have some sort of bond, something different that Stubby didn't have with anyone else, even with Leroy. It was almost like she was his Achilles heel, and he needed her at the same time as he resented her. It wasn't healthy.

"Fuck you," Stubby said, his voice cracking. "Fuck you, always with the God damn judgement, Marlene. I was _never_ fucking good enough for you, was I? In the back of your mind, I'll bet you compared me to Gideon no matter what I did. I'm not as responsible as Gideon, am I? He takes care of his brother, and his sister, and his sister's shitrag kids, and runs your worthless sodding group. I'm not as good-looking as Gideon, either, what that I'm shorter, and not as broad, you know, and I don't dress neat and I don't comb my hair, ever." He was being completely irrational now, but it felt better to yell his doubts at her than to listen to her disappointed, caring voice. She started to interrupt, but her cut her off. "I never say the right thing, either, do I? Not like Gideon, oh no. I don't read the right books, or watch the right shows, or listen to the right fucking music. I don't eat healthy like Gideon, bloody Mr. Vegetarian since we were thirteen."

"Stubby, fuck, stop!" Gideon snapped.

Stubby ignored him. "And I'm _certainly_ not as good a fuck as him, am I Marlene? Can't make you come during, can I? Don't last long enough, right? I don't whisper enough sweet nothings, or touch the right places, and I made you do all the sucking, didn't I?"

"Stubby, you're crossing a fucking line, man," Leroy warned, taking a few slow steps forward in case he might have to pull Gideon back. 

"I'm sorry," Marlene answered, ignoring Gideon and the tension she could feel in him even though she wasn't touching him or looking at him or anything. "I'm sorry, okay? You're right. It was always Gideon. Is that what you want to hear? It won't make it any better to hear me admit it. You know it already anyway, and I'm sorry you got hurt, okay, but that's no reason to do stupid shit. You're not as good because you _choose_ not to be. You put yourself before everyone else and you make bad decisions and it isn't at all that Gideon is just better than you because he is, it's that he's better than you because he doesn't take the easy way out and he puts in the effort and he works hard to be good. You don't. And I'm sorry you got hurt, but I'm not going to let you take the easy out and blame it all on me. Yeah, I made some mistakes. I'm _far_ from perfect. But you can be a fucking asshole, and that's no one's fault but your own. You made bad decisions, and you disappointed me, and you have to live with the consequences. The only way to fix it is to suck up all this denial bull shit and just _fix it_."

Ben stepped forward a little then, too, not liking the way Stubby looked tensed to jump. He was pretty sure Marlene was right, and Stubby was high right now, and he didn't want the guy to do anything he'd regret. He didn't like Stubby all that much, but he understood him a little. He had an uncle that had been a drug addict, and after he'd died, Ben had always wished he'd done more to help. So he figured this was sort of his do over. He wasn't sure if Marlene was doing more harm or good right now, though. He didn't think Stubby was at a place where he would benefit from tough love.

"Cunt," Stubby said. "Self-righteous bint," he goaded, eyes on Marlene but watching Gideon straighten and growl out of the corner of them. "You can say what you like about me, Marlene McKinnon- _Prewett_ , but always remember that you're a lying, worthless slut and you're not good enough for anything but a fuck anyhow. And you weren't that good for that, to be h-"

Stubby didn't get to finish his sentence as Gideon cracked him hard across the jaw before Leroy had time to intervene. "Don't say I didn't try, or that she didn't either!" Gideon half-shouted as Ben put firm hands on Stubby shoulders just as Leroy did the same for him. Stubby spat blood onto the beige carpet as Gideon added, "And don't fucking _dare_ talk about my wife like that again."

Ben held onto Stubby a little too hard, fingers digging into his shoulders hard enough to make the man wince, but his eyes were wild right now, and Ben knew he had to get him out of there. He wanted to help, he really did, but sometimes he hated Stubby for the way he was acting. He was lashing out at everyone, and he was in a total downwards spiral. It made Ben just want to beat some sense into him, but instead he just shoved Stubby towards the door and turned, giving everyone else in the room an apologetic look. "Really, I'm sorry."

"It's okay, Ben," Emmeline said again, voice low as she watched Stubby. Stubby was leaning against the wall by the door, one had pressed to his bloody mouth and laughing softly, looking intense and dangerous, and Emmeline felt something in her stomach coil up. "Ben?"

"Yeah, I'll get him cleaned up," Ben said.

"I wasn't going to suggest..." Emmeline said, trailing off. "Just be careful."

"Yes, do listen to mum, Benny," Stubby said mockingly, giving Ben a slight shove and grinning. "You're such a fucking pansy-arsed fairy, boy-o," he continued, figuring that if he wasn't allowed to insult Marlene or Gideon anymore, he could have his usual fun taunting Ben. "Grow some bollocks, eh?"

Ben clenched his jaw and cracked his knuckles, but didn't rise. "You need to go back to your room and sleep it off, man. I'll carry you if I have to, or you can save your dignity and walk."

"Yeah, yeah," Stubby said, anger mostly receding and being replaced with a sort of light-headed discomfort at the expense of whatever he'd taken. He sure as fuck couldn't remember. "Going to carry me across the threshold, are you? You're making me swoon with your sexy talk."

Ben just opened the door and shoved Stubby, and the two finally left. Emmeline watched the door shut behind them and sighed heavily. What a mess. She turned then to look at Marlene, who seemed a little pale and stiff in comparison to how passionate she'd been just a few moments before as she'd tried to talk sense into Stubby.

Marlene dropped to sit on the edge of one of the beds, laughing hollowly. "He always did know how to make me feel like shit."

Gideon sat down beside her and tucked an arm around her. "He knows how to make everyone feel like shit," he said, and then, leaning close to Marlene and whispering in her ear so only she could hear, added, "You're beautiful and wonderful. Don't let him get to you. He's just really fucked up. I love you, okay?"

"Do you think he's like that because of me?" Marlene asked, despite all the stuff she'd said about it being no one but Stubby's fault. "Do you think I made him worse?"

"No," Gideon said firmly. "Don't think that. He's created his own demons, Marlene, and he's let them take him over. No one else deserves that blame, or can rightfully take it. Just Stubby."

Marlene leaned into him and all his reassurances. She didn't deserve him. Instead of responding to his statement, she kissed him and whispered, "I love you too. I didn't say it before."

Leroy cleared his throat, not wanting to interrupt the moment, but, at the same time, not wanting the purpose of the evening to be ruined because Stubby was an enormous prick.

"Sorry," Gideon said. "Well. That was interesting. A good punch in always inflates my appetite, and I could use a drink."

"Ah, hell, me too," Marlene said, and forced a smile. "The night is still totally salvageable. And I'm starving. Pub food?"

"Works for me," Leroy said. "I have a ridiculous craving for onions."

"There's a decent looking pub just around the corner, actually," Emmeline put in as she grabbed her coat, glad that Gideon and Marlene were the sort of people who could let things go. The evening still had all sorts of possibilities. "A little expensive, but that's London for you."

"I'm willing to splurge a little, being it's our honeymoon and all," Gideon said, waggling his eyebrows at Marlene.

"Oh, yeah, you're a romantic fool, you are," Marlene snorted, rolling her eyes at him. "Don't get carried away with the extravagance. I might get used to it."

Gideon snorted. "I wouldn't bother. We'll likely be living off instant rice and tap water if we ever make it to America. Anyhow, enough of this procrastinating and awkward 'do we talk about it or not?' conversation. Let's go stuff our faces, and get drunk."

"Hear, hear!" Emmeline laughed, taking Leroy's hand and heading for the door.

"What do you think is faster? Seven flights of stairs or waiting for the elevator?" Marlene asked, a challenging smile on her face. "Who wants to race? I call the elevator."


	33. With a Little Help From My Friends (October 21st-30th, 2007)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Where a plan goes into motion, tensions rise, and lifelong friendship is put to the test.

"It'll just be a second," Frank said as he pulled into the mostly empty car park. It was a Sunday, and very few people came into work on Sundays. He and Alice were on their way to his parents house for supper; his mother had taken Neville to the fall picnic of her ladies aid that afternoon, who'd all deigned to bring their grandchildren for showing-off and cooing purposes. Alice and Frank had spent the afternoon outside in their garden, enjoying the lingering warmth of summer and the cool, crisp smells of autumn, while sipping tea and deciding what Neville might be for his first _real_ Halloween. They'd settled on him being a lion.

When they were getting ready to head over to his parents house, Frank had gotten a text message saying his dad needed him to pick up something at the office. Nothing specific, just something he'd left on Frank's desk with the intention of reminding him about it, but had forgotten. He wasn't specific, just said that Frank would know it when he saw it. It was strange of his dad to send text messages, for one, as he was slightly petrified of the dial tone on his handy, never mind the other contraptions. The tone of the message was a little weird as well, but Frank was more surprised than suspicious.

"Do you want to come in, honey bear?" he asked as he turned off the motor and then unbuckled his seatbelt.

"Well, with all that's been going on lately, I'd just feel better not being alone," Alice said, and then rolled her eyes at herself as she unbuckled her own seatbelt. "Isn't that silly? I'm being far too paranoid, I know."

"Better safe than sorry, I suppose," Frank said. Admittedly he'd been more than a little paranoid himself lately, especially after Riddle's peons had taken a sledgehammer to Lily and James' backdoor. "And it's not as though Mum or Dad get to tut at us for being late, seeing it was Dad who sent us here."

Following Frank towards the entrance, she asked, "What is it that's so urgent it gets him figuring out how to text message, do you suppose? Maybe that fax came back from Baker and Baker about that department head position?"

Frank had inquired about a rather well paying position with a rather well known insurance firm, and maybe Mr. Longbottom just didn't want to spoil the good news. That would explain why he'd texted instead of calling, and why he wouldn't say what it was Frank had to pick up.

"Ooh, can I check? Please, Frankie?"

"I guess it could be," Frank said, and couldn't help but grin. This position would give him the opportunity to really move forward in his profession, and give him the sort of experience his father's company couldn't. "And of course you can. Although it's probably just another ledger of suspicious interviews from the Sage case. I wish they'd bloody give up already. It's awfully hard to convince your insurance firm that your mother's dead and gone when it's president helped her distinguish mozzarella from cheddar in the supermarket the day after you filed the claim."

"Oh, do say hi to Gertrude for me, will you? She's awfully embarrassed by the whole mess," Alice said. She loved living in a small town. Things like that never happened in big cities.

Pushing the thoughts aside, however, she bounced on her toes outside of Frank's office. "Okay, take a step back. I want to get first look at it. I'm _sure_ it's a fax from Baker and Baker just begging you to come work for them."

Alice kissed Frank quickly and then shooed him away so he couldn't see his desk from the door.

"Ready, Frankie? This could be big!"

"Ready, Alice," Frank said, smiling at her. "And no matter what it is, you know I love you, right?"

"You'd better!" Alice chirped and turned the handle.

"Hey, what's that--" Frank started, his intention to ask what the sudden, strange smell that seemed to be filling the empty office was cut off by a fierce explosion that hurled him up and over several desks, and had him smash, _hard_ , into a steel filing cabinet. He was knocked unconscious, the last thing he heard before blacking out being the sound of the ringing fire alarm.

***

"Maybe I am suggesting you don't know how to do your job. Frankly, it's debatable whether or not you even know what your job _is_ at this point, so astounded by your complacency am I," Augusta Longbottom ranted at the both annoyed and scared looking nurse before her. "I want to know the exact and full status of my daughter in law, and I want updates every fifteen minutes. Is that really so much to ask? All it takes is a little efficiency on your part."

"Ma'am, there's nothing I can tell you," the nurse said. "Your son is talking to the doctors. You'll just have to wait for him."

"I do not want to _wait_..." Augusta started, but then Frank re-entered the waiting room. "Franklin! What's going on? Is Alice going to be all right?"

Wincing at the pain in his back, Frank looked at his mother with red eyes that had cried themselves out. Rubbing at his face with his bandaged hands (he had scratches all over from the desks, and whatever else he'd hit), he said, "She's going to be okay. Just. The, uh. The blast..." He took a deep breath, and then swallowed. "She took the brunt of the thing in her throat and chest. She's not. There's no way she's ever going to speak again."

Augusta stared at Frank and then put a firm hand on his shoulder. "So we'll all learn sign language. It isn't the end of the world. Now if she's not awake, then go outside. Your son is scared and he needs you. I'll wait with Alice and as soon as she wakes up, I'll come get you."

"Okay. Yes," Frank said, and sniffed as he'd, remarkably, started crying again. "Thank you, Mum. Could you. Could you do me a favour?"

"What would you like?" Augusta asked brusquely. Jerry had always been so much better at this aspect of parenting than Augusta had. She'd been the enforcer, and Jerry had been the comforter. That's how it worked. Now, though, her little boy was a grown man and crying before her. "That is... of course I can. Whatever you need."

"Can you. Can you call Gideon Prewett, and tell him what happened? I mean, I'm sure he's heard something about it, but he needs to. He's got to be told it was me and Alice. You know Molly Weasley's number, right, Mum?" Frank said. Gideon needed to be told. The Order needed to know. Frank had no doubt that Riddle was responsible for this, the _sick_ bastard, and the group needed to protect themselves, or more of this was bound to happen.

"Yes, yes, I'll call. Now go downstairs, Frank. Neville needs you," Augusta said, and pulled her son into a brief but fierce hug.

And with that, she turned away, heading towards Alice's room. That girl was lucky she'd survived this. For all Augusta had thought she'd felt about Alice, if she'd left her Frank behind, and broken his heart like that, Augusta didn't know what she would have done.

***

It had been a long day. There was hardly anything left of his father now. He was only alive because of machines. His mother kept hoping he'd bounce back and they'd have one more good period with him, like a few months back when he'd had almost two weeks conscious and clear and laughing. It had been a the best twelve days Elphias could remember in he didn't know how long. He'd crashed, of course, like they knew he would, worse than before. Elphias had gone back to work, but his mother had clung on, hoping they'd get a chance to say goodbye. She felt like she'd given him false hope last time, and she wanted to just talk to him without making weak plans for the future.

Elphias knew life wasn't dictated by want, however, and so while he went almost every day for visits, he didn't take anymore time off work. He wasn't hanging on to anything. He knew his father was as good as dead, and they wouldn't get a second chance at a farewell just because they'd blown the first one hoping and crying miracle.

That was just how life worked.

Kicking a rock with his toe, Elphias walked, head down and hands in his pockets, past the same construction zone he'd been passing for weeks now. They'd been blasting away a part of a mountain for ages now, trying to make enough space for a large hospice house near the hospital.

Hospice house. What a joke. Death couldn't be made comfortable. Terminal illnesses and old age weren't something you could make any easier to deal with just by having trained staff around. It was more for the family, Elphias thought. If they couldn't bear to do what he and his mother were doing every day, if they couldn't hack it, at least they could comfort themselves that their dying loved ones were in a nice, comfortable hospice house.

What a fucking joke.

Suddenly shrill screams rang out distantly, echoing around the area. Had Elphias looked up and to his left at that moment he would've seen a suspicious looking man dressed in black peering at him from behind a mound of leveraged rocks just waiting to be pushed, and signalling to people on the ground beyond Elphias' line of sight. One, a woman, was doing the screaming, a man standing beside her. The other, another man, was waiting with a fistful of brick.

"Hello?" Elphias called, stopping in his tracks. "Who screamed?"

He took a few steps into the construction zone. It wasn't a safe area. What if some kids had been playing and something had happened? He had to at least try to help.

"Hello? Where are you?" he shouted. "Scream so I can find you!"

"Oh, God!" the woman shouted, her voice sounding panicked and shaken as she grinned at the man next to her. "Over here, help! Help, I'm wedged under this bar and I can't move!"

Elphias made his way towards the voice, and then froze as soon as he saw a man and a woman lounging near a bulldozer. All his instincts told him to run, except for his pride. "What the hell is going on? What do you think you're playing at?"

"Hello, Mr Doge," the man said lazily, failing to acknowledge Elphias' question. "You're ever so quick to help this poor, distressed maiden."

"I'm practically swooning," the woman said, smirking slyly.

Right. So, tucking his pride under one arm, Elphias turned with the intention of taking off running, when he came face to face with a man holding a brick.

He counted three blows to his face before he blacked out.

***

The foreman, a blocky bloke named Freeman, glancing around with a quirked eyebrow. What a mess. Some buggering brat kids, no doubt; an entire mound of stone meant to be moved the next day and obviously been pushed downward, and lay in a hodge podge on the ground in front of him. Some people walking by from the hospital had spotting the downfall, heard voices from inside the site, and had reported it as a disturbance about twenty minutes ago. Whomever had been there had fled.

Stepping around the rubble, Freeman moved with the intention of checking to see if any damage had been done to the nearby equipment. He nearly tripped over a pair of legs.

 _Legs_?

Freeman rushed to the side of the man, whose body was half-crushed under the sizeable rocks. His clothes were ripped, and he was bleeding in any number of places, and grimly Freeman reached for the body's wrist.

 _Oh, shit_.

Pulling his phone out of his belt he dialled emergency, and as soon as a voice answered said, "I need paramedics at the site of the new hospice, right away. I've found a bloke who got caught under some sort of landslide, but he's still got a pulse."

***

Pulling the paper bags of food out of the backseat, Caradoc surveyed the shack (for it could only be described _as_ a shack) uncomfortably. There was a creepy sort of feeling in the air. His skin was tingling. Caradoc thought it might not be a bad idea to say screw it and get back into the car. He could afford to pay off one missed order for Mary. Still, what sort of delivery supervisor would that make him, especially since he'd had to reprimand another one of the delivery boys earlier in the week for doing the exact same thing?

Shifting the bags in his arms, Caradoc shut the car and headed up the gravel walkway (lined with broken beer bottles) to the front door. He knocked.

Whispered arguing ceased at the sound, and the two inhabitants froze. One man was nervously holding a gun, and another was taking deep, fast breaths.

The one with the gun nodded and the other squeezed his eyes shut and called, "Coming!"

Both inched closer to the door and, after exchanging a determined look, threw the door open and pointed the gun at Caradoc.

"Move and you're dead. Hello, Mr. Dearborn," the one without the gun said.

"Oh fuck," Caradoc said, his eyes going wide as he dropped the bags he was holding out of surprise.

"You're going to fall through the floor bringing our food in," the one without the gun said. "It's a shame, isn't it? Come on in, then."

"Yeah, and no mucking about," the guy with the gun said, sounding just as nervous as he looked.

Caradoc did as he was told, stepping around the food bags and into the shack, his heart pounding in his chest. "What are you planning to do? Kill me?"

"Well, actually, yeah," the guy with the gun said, and cast a nervous look to the hole they'd broken in the floor, a few feet into the rundown old shack. "There are some sharp bits of wood you're going to fall on. No one will ever know it was m-mur... intentional."

"You sound like a scared little girl," the other man spat, and then moved to push Caradoc towards the hole.

"Well excuse me if murder doesn't... oh shit," the guy swore, letting go of the gun with one hand and wiping his face. "Seriously. Murder. That's like... that's _life_. I just..."

"Shut up!" the other guy screamed. "Murder or death. Those are our choices. I pick living."

"I wouldn't mind choosing living myself," Caradoc said, realizing how obviously the man with the gun didn't want to kill him. He'd been a cop long enough to remember that the best course of action was to talk his way out of his current situation, but he wasn't sure they'd let him.

The other guy shook his head and got ready to shove Caradoc, but the gun moved, changing it's target.

"Stop! Stop. Don't push him. I can't do it. I can't. We'll just, we'll send him somewhere. Take him somewhere. Whatever. I know you don't want to do it either, man, come on," he said, tightening his grip on the gun. "No one will ever know what happened except you and me. Riddle will just think no one found him, and Lestrange doesn't know. No one will check."

Caradoc wasn't sure whether to sigh with relief or panic.

"He'll find out," the man without the gun said. "And he's completely batshit insane, man!"

"Then we'll make something up. He _is_ insane. We'll think of something he'll believe," the guy said. "I can't murder in cold blood, I can't. I'd rather take my chances. Wouldn't you?"

The gunless man stepped back. "What'll we do with him, then? I mean, Jesus Christ, we can't just _hide_ him forever."

"I know a place we can take him," the guy with the gun said nervously, shooting Caradoc a terrified look. "It's a condemned building a friend of a friend of mine owns. It's cheaper to leave it all locked up than to tear it down. No one ever goes there. Won't for years."

"So. Um. It's kidnapping, then?" Caradoc asked.

"Shut up!" the gunman snapped at Cara, pointing the gun right at his head and gripping it with two hands.

"What'll we do though? Just leave him there? Let him die?"

"I don't know!" shouted the guy with the gun, waving it around a little. "I don't know, I don't know. All I know is I can't do it, not like this."

"Fine. Fine, we'll... we'll take it and we'll wait it out. Riddle's probably going to get found out, right? And then we could just. Could we give him back?"

"Yeah. We'll just, we'll let someone else find him once Riddle's taken care of. That'll work. That'll be... that'll work," the guy with the gun replied. "Okay. So. Walk back out the door and go round back. We have a car there. And no fucking mucking about!"

***

"I can't believe this," Edgar said quietly, probably for the hundredth time. He was holding Dorcas in his lap, both arms wrapped tightly and protectively around her and her swollen, eight months pregnant stomach.

Lily sat next to James with her face in her hands, her head pointed downward at her shoes. "Oh _God_ ," she said breathlessly.

James' arm was around Lily, clutching tightly to her shoulder. His face was white, and he was saying nothing.

Remus was sitting with his legs crossed and his hand on Sirius' thigh next to him, though he looked ashen and like he might be sick at any moment.

Marlene was pacing at the entrance to the living room, waiting for Gideon to come out of Fabian's room. She knew Fay needed Gideon more right now, but she was scared and this was bad and she wanted someone to cling to too.

Fabian's bedroom door clicked then and Gideon came out, pale and breathing shakily. Fabian trailed behind him, ashen-faced, red-eyed and looking completely lost and frightened. Here were two men known for their confidence and courage and near-indestructibility; now they were absolutely broken. Gideon swallowed and surveyed everyone in the room as he drew his wife close to him, kissing the side of her head.

"I talked to Frank," he said finally. slowly. "He's going to... to come over. Soon, hopefully."

Fabian sat down in the corner of the couch and pulled his legs to his chest, taking deep breaths. Caradoc was gone and Elphias was in the hospital, and aside from Gideon, those were the people who he was closest with and who'd been in his life the longest. He literally didn't know what to do with himself.

Dorcas took one look at Fabian and then shot a beseeching look around the room. _Someone_ needed to sit with him, but Edgar wasn't going to let her go. James looked just as bad as the rest of them, but he also looked strong enough that he didn't need to cling.

"Lily," Dorcas whispered, and then nodded at Fay.

Lily shuffled over wordlessly to Fabian and sat beside him, pushing his legs down and cuddling into him, hugging him tightly. Everyone seemed to be watching the two of them, but no one had anything to say.

Fabian ducked his head, dropping it against Lily's shoulder, letting her waves of red hair hide his face.

"Look, we should just..." Marlene started, and then reached over and gripped one of Fabian's hands, looking out at everyone else from her spot in Gideon's chair with him. "What do we do? What _can_ we do? There's got to be something."

"There's something," Lily said. "A friend of mine used to work for VDM, and he did me a favour. I was... I was holding off because I didn't think we'd need them. I thought it might blow over but, um. James, can you pull the duatang out of my bag, please?"

James reached into her bag as requested and handed it to her, confused. He hadn't heard any about this.

"What's that?" Remus asked softly.

"It's a list of employees that he knew about," Lily explained. "A lot of them are people we've already dealt with before. There are some pictures, and some just have names, or just descriptions." She held it out for Gideon.

Gideon flicked through it, eyebrows furrowed. The majority of pictures were familiar, as were a lot of the names, but a few drew blanks. "Well this is good. Partially good. Um. Eyes and ears, and all that. We can make copies, and everyone can look them over and keep their eyes and ears open."

"Jesus _fuck_ ," Sirius said, voice barely audible. "When. I mean. No one. This is _insane_. Attempting fucking murder? Presumed kidnappings?"

Fabian whimpered.

"So we'll just, we'll fucking learn the names and faces and we'll be fine," Dorcas said, sounding a little desperate. "Nothing bad is going to happen to any one else. Right?"

"We've all got to watch out for each other," James said in response, hoping he sounded reassuring.. "And I know it's scary, and I know there's so much going on, but we can all help each other."

"Yeah, or we can go on fucking vacation until this all blows over," Dorcas said. "I'm eight months pregnant. I can't... If anyone, after all this, if anyone fucks it up, I swear to fucking God Almighty..."

"No one's going to fuck it up," Edgar said. "No one better even try."

"We just have to be careful. We can't live in fear, either. We can't stop living our lives because of this," Gideon said. "He's clearly unstable as shit to do this all in one bloody go of it."

"Unstable hardly covers it," Frank's voice said from the landing. Everyone went quiet as he came down the stairs, wincing with each step. "Driving's a real cunt when you're all bandaged up."

"Sorry. I could've swung by and picked you up," James said, getting up to pull Frank into a brief hug. "How're you doing, mate? Pretty shitty, I bet."

"I've been better," Frank said honestly. "They've got Alice on a little more medication. They think she'll be good to come around by tomorrow. And, uh. I ran into Elphias' mother at the hospital. She's in quite a state, what with his father being pretty much labelled vegetative. She told me that the doctors still aren't sure about his eyesight. The optical nerves are pretty distressed, but they're trying their best. He's still in surgery."

"Fucking shit," Fabian said softly. "It's all a load of fucking shit, you know. We can't just... we can't just sit back and wait for him to try and pick us off. We ought to fight back."

"You're upset, and you're going to suggest something you don't mean," Marlene said softly. "You know you don't believe in violence."

"Of course I _believe_ in it. How can you _not believe_ in something like that? That's daft. That's like... that's like saying you don't believe in science or you don't believe in... in... colour!" Fabian said, voice sharp like broken glass. "It's right there. Anyone can see it. And they're obviously not too fussed about inflicting it, so why should we be?"

"We can't do anything like that," Gideon said. "It's easier to pin things on us than to clearly say 'Riddle did this'. You were all interviewed by the police. It's useless, Fabian. Completely and utterly. And the worst part is that this is such a big thing, and such an obvious thing, _but_ the _only_ thing that they even consider related to the broken windows and the slashed tires and the heavy breathing on the other end of the telephone line is the fact that Caradoc has seemingly vanished. And he's not legally 'missing' until tomorrow. Alice and Frank and Elphias have been uninvolved with the Order long enough to not be considered possible targets."

"An 'imagined vendetta against us'," Edgar spat. "That's what the officer who spoke to us said. And _laughed_ at us, to boot."

"I slapped him clear across the face. I was so mad I could've just..." Dorcas trailed off. "The way he looked at us, like he thought we weren't fucking worth the effort it would take to protect us. 'You're pretty young to be pregnant, aren't you? You blaming Riddle for that one too?' Fucking pricks all have their heads up their arses, and always have."

"The fact is, they can't do anything. So we do have to take care of ourselves," Marlene said, voice shaking. "I'd say, if you can get out, you ought to. Just for a few days or a week, just in case. I doubt they'll try anything right away now, but if anyone sees or hears or _senses_..."

"You get out," Remus put in softly. "Don't second guess yourself. If you think even maybe... just get out. Marlene's right."

"We just keep doing what we're doing. Anything that happens, we report it, we get it on file, we make the police aware of it whether they want to be or not," Gideon said. "For now, we stop. No protests or anything. Our distant contacts are stopping their investigative missions, or anything else we've had in the works. We've cut off the money and cancelled out the account. This isn't defeat. Far from it. But this isn't about him anymore. It's about protecting ourselves, and our families, and children. We have more important things to worry about beyond child labour and trees, and ugly, over-priced dead animals."

"My God. What have we sentenced ourselves to?" Lily asked.

"We stood up for what is right. Any shit that's happening is just because Riddle is a psychotic bastard," James said firmly. "And we'll get through this. It'll be fine."

"It isn't fine," Fabian spat, nudging Lily away and getting to his feet. "It won't be fine. Alice isn't going to be able to talk ever again, and Elphias might be blind, and never mind his internal injuries. Caradoc is _gone_. He's... anything could have..." Fabian trailed off and took a stilling breath. "I'm sorry. I know I'm supposed to be optimistic and idealistic and supportive and calming and all that shit that I normally do, but I can't do it at just this very moment, okay? Sorry."

Everyone watched him leave and listened in silence to the click of his bedroom door behind him.

"You know what, this is fucking bull fucking cock," Dorcas said. "And I think this meeting is over. No one else can possibly say anything to make any of us feel better, and we have to go home and get some sleep so we can be alert for people trying to fucking kill us tomorrow."

Remus sighed and rubbed the bridge of his nose with both his index fingers. "Well, for what it's worth, our place is your place, for all of you. We've not had any trouble yet, and I don't know what that means, but if it would make any of you feel better, bring your bedding up to ours. You can all stay, if you want."

"I honestly don't think that spells good things, Remus," Gideon said, his voice a little stiff, and his eye darting back to his brother's closed bedroom door. "I think right now it's better if we trust ourselves ahead of anyone else."

"Yeah, thanks," Sirius snapped. "Lets create more bad fucking feelings, why don't we? Nicely done though, Gideon. 'Sorry Remus, I don't mean to sound like an asshole, but you and Sirius are the most suspicious fucks of all.'"

" _Sirius_ ," Lily started, but Sirius cut her off.

"No, that's what he fucking meant. You know it, I know it, everyone in this God damn room can see quite fucking plainly that we're being set up to take the fall for this bullshit, and it's not over, and denying it only makes me looks more suspicious, but you know what? I've got _nothing_ left. I would never... Look, Jesus, I love all of you like family. The last thing I would _ever_ do is sell everything that's important to me away for some... _lunatic_!"

"Sirius," Remus said softly, but he looked hurt as well. "We can't make them believe anything. All we can do is our best to help."

"For what it's worth, I'd sell my own cock and balls on E-bay before I thought either of you would sell any of us out," James said firmly, giving Remus and Sirius supportive looks. "Whoever betrayed us, whoever's working against us, I know it's not you."

"Thank you, James," Remus said, and then met Gideon's eyes levelly. "And the offer still stands. If it would make anyone feel better, rather than worse as seems to be Gideon's opinion, you are welcome at ours."

"Come on, that's not what he meant," Marlene said, annoyed. "Don't try and stir shit up. Now's not the time, if you don't mind. The spy isn't the issue at the moment."

"The spy is _always_ the issue," Sirius spat. "It's looming over our heads, and now, when it's biting in the arses, it's going to tear us apart and make us blame and hate one another. What then, huh? We'll all be fucking _dead_ so it won't matter anyway. Oh, except Remus and I, of course, because we'll be too busy laughing ourselves stupid over how we managed to take you all down."

"Sirius, don't say shit like that," Edgar said. "We're past the point of changing anything about the spy problem, or fixing the issue, or changing the course of whatever Riddle's planned for us. That's what bothers me. He's probably got a specific sort of thing arranged for each and every one of us. He's a stickler for details, Riddle. Whatever's coming, whenever it's coming, and it is... no matter how much preparing and crying and second-guessing we do. We know we're targets."

"We are," Lily agreed. "What's even left as an option, besides running away and hiding, or staying put and waiting it out?"

"There's praying," Frank suggested, calmly. "Praying and hoping. And accepting the inevitability of fate. I don't want to sound like a preacher, but after... after what happened today, I just have to believe that there's a reason. That there's sense in this, somewhere. In God's plan for me, for Alice, for our son... for the rest of our lives. However long or short that time may be."

"Bugger that," Dorcas said bluntly. "That sounds a hell of a lot like giving up to me. You let go of the reigns to your own fucking life, and someone's going to swoop in and snatch control, but I'll bet you anything it won't be some fucking all powerful, benevolent god.

"You know what? This is... this is a bad idea," James said loudly. "Not only is the discussion just going to piss everyone off, but it isn't going to get us any closer to where we want to be. I think ending the meeting was a good idea. Does anyone else have anything to add? Anything relevant?"

"James, where are we? And whose society is this? I'm not trying to be rude, but it isn't your place to end a meeting," Marlene said. While she wasn't sure how Gideon felt about starting up the Order now, considering how life-or-death things were getting, she still knew it would be better not to let everyone jump in and make decisions. That way would lead to chaos. "You know?"

"Yeah, no, it's fine. Sorry," James said, only a little annoyed. He understood where Marlene was coming from, even if she was being a bit of a cow about it. "I was just trying to stop another pointless argument before it sprung up."

Gideon cleared his throat. "Everyone... just go home. This is all bad enough, and I just. I don't want to hear any more of it. We're done. Go home."

"Aye, aye, captain," Sirius said sarcastically, getting to his feet and wanting nothing more than to leave as quickly as possible.

"Gideon," James said, before Gideon could go after Fabian. "Look, I know you have a lot on your mind, but can Lily and I talk to you really quick?"

Gideon rubbed his face with a hand and nodded at Marlene to go see Fabian because someone needed to. Sometimes Gideon wished there were three of himself, especially in situations like this, because a third of him was trying to maintain control, and to lead, a third of him was trying to comfort his brother and his wife, and a third of him just wanted to curl up in a ball and go to sleep. "Of course you can," he said tiredly. "I'm sorry, I'm just. Well. You know."

"We do," Lily said, quietly, glancing around as everyone started to pull on coats and head for the landing.

Marlene kissed Gideon on the mouth, then, in an intense, lingering sort of way, and then headed for Fabian's room. Everyone just expected Gideon to be okay because he was strong, powerful Gideon. She hoped he knew he was allowed to seek reassurance too.

James offered Marlene a tight smile and then stepped closer to Gideon. "It's just... we're going to go to Kingsbridge for a few days soon, to visit Lily's parents. We're probably going to leave Harry with them for a bit too, just in case. We're not telling anyone, we just wanted you to know. So you'd know where to reach us if, God forbid, anything happened."

Gideon nodded. "All right. Around when, then?"

"Probably Halloween, thereabouts," Lily answered. "My mum wants to take Harry trick or treating to all her church friends' houses."

Gideon took a deep breath. "Good enough," he said, sadly. "Listen, I'm. I'm going to go see Fabian. Sorry I'm so distracted, but just. Goodnight. Okay?"

"No need to apologize," James said softly. "If there's anything we can do, just let us know, okay? Night, Gid."

"Yeah," Gideon answered distractedly, and then walked down the hallway and into Fabian's room, shutting the door behind him.

"He looks as though he's got the weight of the world on his shoulders, and it's breaking his back," Lily said, thoughtfully. "Do you suppose we should've kept it to ourselves completely and just left?"

"Someone has to know where we are," James said softly. "And I hate to give him more to worry about, but who else better to tell? I mean, Remus and Sirius, but... I think it's better this way."

"Yeah," Lily said, reaching for her purse off of the floor. "We should go. I have to work in six hours, and I'm very tired."

The two walked outside, bidding a quiet farewell to Ed and Dor on their way, waving at Frank as he pulled out, and then pausing as they came across Sirius and Remus still in the drive. "Hey mates."

"Hi," Remus said softly, still in a rather foul mood from the meeting. He hated all this crap, all of the insinuations against them. What was even worse, though, was that he understood them. "You two all right?"

Lily nodded. "Just very worn out," she said.

"What were you talking to Gideon about?" Sirius asked bluntly.

"We just offered to help any way we could," James said, feeling uncomfortable about lying to Sirius. He didn't think he'd ever lied to Sirius. Not as long as he could remember, anyway. "And hey, don't mind that crap about you guys not being targeted. People are just scared. I mean, for all we know, you're being left alone because you're great flaming fairies just like Riddle. So."

"Thanks, James," Remus said dryly, adding more sincerely, "Really, though. Thank you. For what you said in there. Even if it didn't do any good."

"Yeah, mate," Sirius added, and knew perfectly well that James was lying to him but didn't bother to say so. Instead he swallowed the bitter taste of it and said, "We should probably get going. Take care, eh?"

"You too," James said softly.

Remus just looked between the two of them for a moment, and then turned and followed after Sirius. "Bye."

***

"Looks like they're leading a parade," Sirius commented, confused, as James' car pulled onto and up the street, two cop cars trailing behind it. It was the day before Halloween, and Remus and Sirius had come over to drop Harry's holiday treats off since Sirius was working the next night, and Remus had midterms to study for, and wouldn't get the chance. They'd found the house empty, and had seated themselves on the front step to wait. They stood as James and Lily pulled into the driveway, and climbed out, the bobbies following behind as James collected Harry out of the backseat. As the Potter's approached them, Sirius noted the tight set of James' jaw, and the anger bubbling just under the surface. Combined with Lily's pale face, and the four cops following them to the door, Sirius had more than a strong suspicion that something awful had just happened.

"Oi," he said, in lieu of a greeting. "What's going on?"

Instead of replying, James, with Lily close to his side, just gave Sirius and Remus a cold look. "I don't think you two ought to be here right now. If you know what's good for you, you'll fuck off."

"If you want us to look inside like you so politely insisted we do, Mr. Potter, than you ought to unlock the house," one of the policemen drawled from his spot next to the front door where he was peering into the house through a window.

"Excuse me?" Sirius asked, confused, anger quickly bubbling at James' tone. "Is that a threat, James?"

Without a word, or without looking at Sirius or Remus, Lily took Harry from James and went to the door to unlock it and let the police inside. Standing just inside the door and holding Harry close to her, Lily started crying softly as she listened to what she was sure would be the argument to end James and Sirius' friendship.

"Yeah. It is. Get off of my property," James replied, voice shaking. He'd never been this completely angry in his entire life, and he certainly wasn't thinking clearly. His fists were clenched so tight at his sides now that Lily had taken Harry, his fingernails were digging into his palms. "Now. Both of you."

"James," Remus said softly, eyes wide and heart in his throat. "What... what happened? What do you think we've done?"

"Yeah, James. I'm really interested to know what's changed your mind on the trusting us implicitly front," Sirius snapped, livid. "Not that I believed that for five fucking seconds."

"Fuck you," James retorted, taking three quick steps forward and getting right in Sirius' face. "I just about lost my son today. I just about lost Harry, do you, do you have any idea..." James voice broke and the mask of anger shattered for just a moment. "And then I get back home, and I see you two. The only fucking people who knew where we were going, and you try to make _me_ feel guilty?"

"James..." Remus said softly, and it was obvious to him that James was just terrified and irrational and while Remus wasn't about to offer forgiveness for James' accusation, he didn't want this to go further than it should. It would break them all. He put a hand on James arm and said fiercely, "There is nothing on this planet that could let me hurt Harry or you or Lily."

"That is such _shit_!" James shouted, pushing Remus' hand away. "Right there, Remus. You'd do anything for Sirius. Everyone knows that. Now I told you both to leave, and I meant it."

"Oh, so it's me, is it? Jesus Christ, could you turn your brain back on?" Sirius yelled back. "Your sense of reasoning is telling you that I concocted a plan to kidnap Harry and convinced Remus to give me a hand? How _desperate_ are you to blame someone, huh? Because I hope you fucking know that what's left of nineteen years of friendship is hanging by a thread!"

"I just about lost my son!" James roared, hands coming up to shove Sirius away, trying to ignore the truth in Sirius' words. If James didn't know who was behind it, he couldn't protect his family. He had to protect his family. It was his _job_ , his _purpose_ to protect his family. "You two were the only two that knew where we were going. The _only_ ones. We've had our tires slashed, and our house broken into, and someone tried to steal Harry. And you? You've had _nothing_. I can't afford to take risks. You're a risk. Sirius, get the fuck off of my property."

Remus turned away from James, placing a hand over his mouth. He couldn't actually mean it. It would kill Sirius. Remus didn't know what to do.

Sirius, for a moment, actually felt his heart stop.

A loud silence fell on them as Sirius stared at James as though hoping, at any second, he was going to yell, 'Gotcha!' and it would all just be one big horrible joke. But James didn't. He just glared, his face red, his breathing harsh, and as though he'd been hit by a transport truck Sirius realized that there was nothing left to do. "Fine," he croaked, willing himself not to get emotional until he was well away from James' stare. "If that's what you want to do to protect your family, James, drive off two people who nearly love your kid as much as you do yourself, then fine. Bye. I officially resign as Harry's godfather and legal guardian, and there's that then. We're no longer your friends."

Remus just squeezed his eyes shut at the words, wishing they could both take it all back. As Sirius walked stiffly past him, however, Remus couldn't stand it anymore, and he turned and drew his arm back, and punched James as hard as he could in the face. "How could you? How could you say such things? He's your best friend and he loves you and so do I, just like we love Harry and Lily, and we'd never, _ever_ do anything to hurt you, neither of us, so any of your stupid, pointless justifications about who made who do what are total _bollocks_ , James, because all we both ever did was love you!"

James reeled at the unexpected hit, and then watched silently as his two ex-best mates walked off of his property, as asked, and out of his life. James collapsed to the ground then, leaning back against the wall of the house. He knew they hadn't done anything, but James _had_ needed someone to blame. He could blame Riddle all he wanted, but he couldn't do anything about that. He needed to blame someone he could affect. And in doing that, he'd effectively lost himself both a brother and a friend. He doubted either Sirius or Remus would ever forgive him.

"House is all clear Mrs. Potter. As expected," one of the two policemen who'd gone inside said on his way past Lily. He got a look at her teary face, however, and the sneer dropped right off of his face. "Er, if there's anything else we can do..."

"We're fine, thank you," Lily managed. "I'm going to try and put Harry down for a nap, James," she added, her voice tired as she walked past the officers, and headed upstairs with her son.

James didn't say anything. He just sat against the front of his house and stared off into space. Once the officers left, James got up and went into the living room, figuring Lily would probably stay upstairs with Harry for a while. She wouldn't be pleased with him. He'd been an idiot after all. He didn't feel any safer, or any more prepared to protect his family. He didn't feel any more in control, and he certainly didn't feel any better about all of it.

His chest started to ache and his eyes started to burn, and all James could think about was how he'd always promised never to turn his back on Sirius because they were family, they were brothers, and then he _had_. James couldn't keep the sobs in then. He hadn't cried yet, and with the attempted kidnapping of Harry and the mess he'd just made, he just couldn't keep it in any longer.

Upstairs, Harry went to sleep easily. Lily sat in her rocking chair and watched him for a while, contemplating the day and stifling her crying with a pillow so she wouldn't wake the baby. After a few moments in indulging in anger at James for ruining the best friendships of their lives at the expense of paranoid fear, and in her own personal grief and berating after nearly losing her son, Lily got to her feet, and headed downstairs.

"James?" she asked softly, coming into the living room.

James didn't even bother to wipe his face or muffle the sounds. He'd always been more of a get-mad-and-hit-things sort of guy, and the only tears he could remember crying in years, maybe since before East Portlemouth, were when he and Lily had watched his father's speech for him on the end of their wedding DVD. James wasn't familiar with this kind of crying. He didn't know how to stop it.

"I didn't..." he started, and then stopped as his throat closed up and he had to work to take a deep breath.

Lily sat down beside him and sighed, reaching for his hand and squeezing it. "I know."

"I... I'm supposed to..." James tried again, and then just gave up and wrapped his arms around Lily, burying his face in her neck. "I didn't know what else to do."

"You'll just have to apologize, is all," Lily said quietly. "When we get back from Kingsbridge."

"I don't think they'll ever talk to me again," James said, voice hitching, so he paused to sniffle and try to compose himself a little. "I've never seen him look like that. At least not at me. I've done a lot of stupid things in my life, but..."

"You're under a lot of stress, James. You might've been irrational in what you said, but..." Lily shook her head. "Sirius loves you too much. You love one another too much."

"Remus punched me," James said dully. "He actually hit me. It hurt, too."

Lily couldn't help it. She laughed. "And you're surprised? Just because he's a poof doesn't mean he can't hit like a boy, you know. He might not go waving his testosterone around like you and Sirius do, but he's still a man."

"I'm glad it did. I deserved it," James said miserably. "Christ, I'm supposed to know what to do--how to act, how to protect my family, and that includes Sirius and Remus--and I did the exact opposite. I just, I panicked. Harry... I couldn't imagine... I just... I knew it wasn't them, but I didn't know what else to do."

"I know. I just think it's a very annoying reminder of how young and stupid we are," Lily said rationally. "You're only nineteen, James. Family or not, you can't force yourself to always make the right decisions. You just have to do your best."

"That wasn't my best," James said softly. "That was my worst."

"Well you're not perfect, either," Lily said. "It's been a long day, James. You reacted on impulse. It might not be the smartest decision of your life, but it's something you can fix. Nothing is over. That's not the final word. You're still alive and kicking, and you can make it right with him and Remus."

"I hope so," James said softly. "But you're right. It'll have to wait until after Kingsbridge. They won't talk to me now. Come on, we should go pack. We leave bright and early tomorrow."

"Yes, I suppose we should," Lily said. "Would you believe Mum expects him all ready in his costume when we get there? I think the face paint was probably pointless. He's only going to wipe it all off."

"We can do the face paint when we get there," James said and let go of Lily so he could rub at his face and then get to his feet. "We can do the whole costume when we get there. I think his dinosaur tail will be a little hard to fit behind him into the car seat. You know, I don't like this crying business. Makes my eyes feel all swollen and sandy."

"I'm quite familiar with it myself," Lily said. "But I suppose a day like today would make anyone cry. I love you, James. You know that, right?"

"Yeah, I know. I also know I don't deserve you, but you'd better stick around because I love you so much I couldn't live without you," James said before planting a kiss on each of her eyes. "Now come on. I want to get the car packed up before dinner. Then I'll cook."

"Sounds good to me," Lily agreed.

***

Peter looked nervously at Mr. Riddle, but he seemed set on poetic justice. He wanted Peter to be the last person his friends spoke to before... whatever. Before tomorrow. Peter refused to think about the details--not that he'd been told any except that the Potter's, along with all the other Order members, were going to get a good scare to put them off their little society--and thought poetic justice wasn't worth it if it meant he could be implicated. He took a nervous breath and then pushed the speed dial for James and Lily's home.

Pausing from unloading the dishwasher, a dinner plate in her hand, Lily reached for the phone. "Hello?" she asked tiredly.

"L-Lily! Hi, hey, it's Peter," Pete said nervously. His friends were used to his stutter, though, and he knew they wouldn't notice. "How a-are you?"

"Tired. It's been a very long day, Peter," Lily said. "Did you want me to get James?"

"No, no. It's fine," Peter said quickly. "I was just bored. Though I'd c-call and see how you both were. Everything o-okay?"

"Just more things about you-know-what," Lily said. "We were out buying face paint for Harry's Halloween costume this morning and someone tried to snatch him in the parking lot while we were packing in the boot. Scariest moment of my life."

"Oh! Oh, w-wow," Peter said, eyes widening. He hadn't heard about that, and he turned a suspicious look on Mr. Riddle before remembering the guy could have him killed. "Uh, is Harry okay? Are y-you and James okay?"

"He's fine, we're fine," Lily sad. "A little shaken up, obviously. And when we came home Remus and Sirius were here and James just... well. He took everything out on them. It's _horrible_ , Peter, it really is."

"Why would he t-take it out on them?" Peter asked, shooting Mr. Riddle a nervous look. "They're his best m-mates."

"He just wanted someone to blame, and they just happened to be there at the time," Lily explained, sadly. "Hopefully they'll be able to work things out to something resembling normal after Halloween."

"Why a-after?" Peter asked.

"My parents wanted to see Harry so we're spending the holiday in Kingsbridge," Lily said without considering that she and James had agreed not to tell anyone. "We just need a break. Salcombe feels so suffocating, after what happened to Alice and Elphias. And they still haven't found Caradoc. Poor Fabian is going mad."

"You... you're leaving?" Peter asked, and Mr. Riddle stopped smiling. His eyes narrowed and he crossed his arms, make some stupid face at Peter and Peter didn't know what it meant. What did he mean? Peter wasn't psychic! "Uh, when?"

"Yes, bright and early in the morning," Lily answered, and then remembered. "Oh shit, Peter, don't tell anyone where we've gone, all right? We're just... trying to keep a low profile in light of everything that's happened. We don't want to take any chances."

"Yeah, no. Of, of course. I won't t-tell anyone," Peter said, and felt a little dizzy. He wasn't good at this, at real deception. He felt too guilty and lied too poorly. "Have a good trip. I, um. I g-guess I'll see you when you get b-back. I'm going to b-be in Salcombe f-for a w-while. But I sh-should go. You're probably busy getting r-ready to leave a-and all."

"Okay, Peter. Take care," Lily said, and hung up the phone, surveying what was left in the dishwasher with a sigh.

Peter clicked his phone off and looked over at Mr. Riddle, unsure. Had he heard? Did he want to know? Should Peter tell him, or wait to be asked?

T.M. raised an eyebrow. "Well, Pettigrew?"

"Uh, they're leaving. They're going to visit Lily's parents in Kingsbridge. Bright and early tomorrow," Peter said, stuttering vanishing, though he still sounded hesitant. He shrugged and added, "I guess you'll just have to scare them into dropping the Order when they get back."

"Hmm," T.M. said. "That's one thought, Pettigrew, but it might, perhaps, be better if we, ahem, 'scare them into dropping the Order' during their trip. Or maybe even on their way there. Go to Salcombe. Watch the house. You're to call the second they leave. Understand?"

"What, now? It's already nine! I won't even get in until probably one or two, and then I'm supposed to go watch their house bright and early?" Peter asked, and then quickly snapped his mouth shut. "I mean. Yes sir. Okay. Of, of course."

T.M. blinked. "Get out of my office Pettigrew."

"Yes sir," Peter squeaked, and turned immediately, walking quickly to the door. He did as he was told. That's what had gotten him his own flat in zone one of London, access to all sorts of clubs, and pretty girls all the time. He didn't ask questions and he just did as he was told. As he left, he called, "Have, uh, a Happy Halloween, sir!"

 _Happy Halloween, indeed_ , T.M. thought to himself, grinning all the while. Picking up the phone, he dialled a familiar number, and when the voice on the other end answered, T.M. started in. "There's been a change of plans. Thankfully my genius has saved the day, of course. You're to be ready by six. Now listen closely..."


	34. Champagne Supernova, Part A (October 31st, 2007)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Where there is love, loathing, and loss.

Peter had a bad feeling. Nonetheless, he watched from across the street as James and Lily pulled out, and then dialled the phone number he'd been given. He didn't know what Mr. Riddle had planned, and he didn't know what was going to happen, but he knew it wasn't good. He knew it wasn't good, but he didn't want to piss off Mr. Riddle, not now that he was so close to being free. Today was his last day. The end of his employment. He knew something bad was going to happen, but he had to trust James would get out of it on his own, because Peter couldn't do anything. If he did anything, they'd do worse to him than whatever Mr. Riddle had planned for James and Lily. Surely they wouldn't do anything too terrible to them on the way there, as Mr. Riddle had insinuated. Harry was in the car, after all.

Oh _God_.

Swallowing as his call was picked up, Peter stammered, "They left. They just left. I can still see their tail lights. But... but Harry's in the car, and I would really, I'd feel better if you could tell me what was g-going to happen. Just so I know they'll all be o-okay. Can you? Hello? Um, hello?"

He'd been hung up on, and Peter just snapped his phone shut, dropped it into his pocket, and then wiped his sweaty palms on his trousers.

Everyone had heard the rumours. All sorts of rumours. Mostly that Mr. Riddle had lost his mind. But surely he wouldn't do anything too terrible, would he? To James and Lily and innocent little Harry? But Peter had heard those rumours too, the ones about Harry, and about how Mr. Riddle had been heard saying that Harry would bring him down. About how Mr. Riddle _hated_ Harry.

Peter's head began to spin. He thought he might even pass out. Instead, however, he doubled over and puked into the gutter at the end of Lily and James' driveway.

What had he done?

Sirius pulled up by the curb and beside the house just as James turned the corner. Shutting off the engine, Sirius took off his helmet and looked down at Peter in surprise, raising his eyebrows at his old friend. Sirius felt like absolute shit about what had happened between he and James the day before, and had come over early with the intention of trying to talk (and if it came down to it, scream) James into reacquainting himself with common sense.

"Pete?" Sirius asked. "You all right, mate?" He was confused. What was Peter doing in Salcombe, upchucking in front of James and Lily's house at half eight in the morning? Warning lights started blinking in the back of his mind, for some reason, and the hairs on the back of his neck stood up. Sirius felt a chill he was sure had nothing to do with the cool October weather, but zipped up his leather jacket nonetheless.

Peter heard Sirius approach, of course, but he couldn't do much of anything, including running away, while he was vomiting, and so he was forced to finish his business, then wipe his mouth and stand up, blinking up at Sirius. "I'm f-fine. I, uh. I just c-came to say goodbye. I got into t-town last night, and they mentioned leaving today for Kingsbridge, s-so. So I c-came to s-see them off."

"Kingsbridge?" Sirius questioned. "Why're they going to Kingsbridge?"

"To visit Lily's p-parents, I'd assume," Peter said with a shrug. "Look, I've got to go. My mother is probably w-wondering where I am. Breakfast is at eight at h-home."

 _Huh_ , Sirius thought. _Think they'd tell Remus and I they were going out of town. Then again, I suppose that's information only friends are privvy to_. "Right," he said. "Want a ride, then?"

"No. No, I think I'll w-walk," Peter said and started backing away from Sirius. He felt way too freaked to spend any amount of time around his old friends at the moment, and he wanted nothing more than to be alone. "I'll see you later, Padfoot."

"Oh. Okay. Bye, then," Sirius said, and watched Peter practically flee. He looked pale and uneasy and stranger than usual, Sirius thought, shifting his helmet to his other arm and looking at James' house with a heavy heart. There was something weird about today that had nothing to do with costumed children and sweets. "He's getting away from us all," Sirius said to himself, thinking that James was probably leaving town for a few days to make themselves scarce in light of everything that had happened recently. Sirius dimly registered that that was probably what they'd told Gideon at the last Order meeting.

Strange that they'd tell Peter. Especially since, of everyone else in the Order, he was the person they saw the least. He was the friend who was rarely around, who was too busy gallivanting around London and shagging every bird out of his league in silk ties and shiny shoes. And why was Peter in Salcombe, anyway? He hadn't been home since Christmas, for Christ's sake.

Sirius mulled it all for a moment before realization hit him hard and solid in the nose, like a square, forceful punch. "Oh, _shit_ ," he said, eyes going wide and colour draining from his face. _Peter_. That son-of-a-bitch. Oh, shit. James. Lily. _Harry_. Sirius jammed his helmet onto his head and kicked the bike back into life. Tearing down the street and toward the road to Kingsbridge, Sirius half-hyperventilated with panic and rage, determined to get to James before Riddle did.

Peter was going to _pay_ for this.

***

"Should I pull over and let him pass?" James asked, voice as tight as his hands on the wheel. There was a big SUV riding their tail, to a point that James was scared to slow down. "I don't... Lily, what do you think I should do?"

"Vroom!" Harry said happily from the backseat.

"I don't know, James," Lily answered, her voice small and quiet. "I think. James, I think that whomever is driving that car..." she trailed off, swallowing hard, not wanting to finish her sentence; to admit to herself, out loud, that there was a strong possibility that the person behind them was going to try and kill them.

"Vroom!" Harry said again.

"I know," James said softly, and all suspicions were confirmed as he began to slow down to pull over and the SUV rammed them. James swore and stepped on the gas. He didn't know what to do. His heart was pounding, and he did the only thing he could think of. He sped up, heart in his throat. They couldn't be run off the road. His wife, son, and unborn baby were in this car, and he'd do everything in his power to keep them safe. "Hang on, Lils. And call the police."

***

Sirius was halfway to Kingsbridge when he spotted the smoke.

He could smell it, too--gas and hot pavement. Blinking at the straight stretch of land, Sirius' vision focussed, and he saw James' station wagon nose down in a ditch on the side of the road. Sirius stopped as soon as he saw it, climbing off of the bike, dropping his helmet on the ground and running toward them. He could hear Harry crying.

Oh _Jesus_ , he thought, out of breath as he finally came right up on it, watching himself carefully as he stepped around broken glass, stumbling down. Bracing himself he peered inside to see James restrained by his seatbelt with cuts and gashes all over his face and neck. Lily was half-hanging out the passenger side window, having slid partway out of her seatbelt, her legs sticking off at odd angles.

The deployed airbags fluttered pointlessly.

Harry was screaming in the back, and _thank Christ_ he was alive, even if there was blood dripping over his face and all over his little jacket. "James," Sirius breathed, tentative as he reached forward and felt around his best friend's--his bloody _brother's_ \--neck, failing to locate a pulse. The tears started as he pulled out his handy to call the police and an ambulance, but sirens were wailing from not far away and Sirius realized that James had been smart enough to call them before they'd been run off the road.

Sirius went around to Lily's side (choking at the sight of the blood on her face and the broken glass in her hair) but couldn't find a pulse either. He was starting to panic when he finally managed to wrestle the backdoor open and pull Harry out, holding him close and sobbing as he tried to soothe the poor child at the same time.

The police pulled up then, all six cars screeching to a halt, most of the inhabitants moving to deal with the wreckage with only a couple hanging back to deal with the cars that had pulled over, and the people that were getting out to look. They tried to talk to Sirius, but got very little response out of him. When the ambulance arrived, they took Harry from him. They had more questions for him, but there were more important things to do at the moment, and no one noticed him leave until well over an hour later, when one of the bobbies picked up his discarded helmet.

"Think he knew them?" one of the policemen asked the constable in charge.

Nodding sadly, he replied, "He must've. You saw the way that kid was clinging to him. What a fucking mess. Did anyone get his information?"

"I'll go ask Richards. She was the one who talked to him."

"What I want to know is where in the hell he has to be that's more important than this," the constable said softly, clearly distressed. "I think we ought to find him, and fast."

***

Emmeline had rented a developing studio for the day, and had eight rolls of film she wanted to develop. She figured she'd probably only make prints of about a quarter or less of all of her photos, but she'd do contact prints for all the negatives, at any rate. That was the thing about real photography. There was a higher margin of error. You couldn't just delete stuff that didn't turn out like she could with her digital SLR, but sometimes she liked to use good old fashioned black and white film, and an enlarger she could time by hand, and chemicals she mixed herself. It sometimes created a more organic result, she found, and anyway, she loved to fiddle with all the little things you could affect during the development process.

She'd only been in the dark room for a couple hours when--halfway through doing a large 11X14 print she'd taken of herself and Leroy using a tripod and a timer with the intention of framing it (along with a few of the band as well, and various cities she'd been in on tour) as a gift for their parents--someone opened the door. She rushed to hide her photo paper inside it's light proof bag at the same time and then whirled around. "Shut the door, please! I have light sensitive materials out!"

Amycus Carrows cricked his neck and grinned. "I doubt you'll be worrying much about your stupid ol' photos when I'm done with you, _Miss Vance_ ," he said, and then ran his tongue over his top teeth as he surveyed her. Shutting and locking the door he said, "Like taking pictures, do ya?"

"Yes. I do. Now who are you?" Emmeline asked, trying to be subtle as she reached for her cell phone, tucked safely inside of her purse and turned off. It was a long shot, but she had a feeling it was her only shot.

Amycus pulled a gun out of the back of his trousers and laughed, pointing it at her. "I don't really think that's too important. You don't need to know my name to know who I am, now do ya?" Luckily for Emmeline, Amycus was a bit slow on the uptake, and kept the gun on her as he turned his head looking on the shelves for a bottle of Pyrogallic Acid or Catechin or Chlorquinol, all chemicals he'd been forced to memorize especially for this occasion. "No funny business or I'll put a bullet in your eyeball."

"What are you looking for?" Em asked, and figured that despite his threat, his plan was to kill her anyway, though in a way that wouldn't be as obviously murder as a gunshot wound to the head was. She figured the best thing to do would be to try and talk her way out of it. She was practical. She'd always been a realist, and she'd seen the look he'd given her when he'd first walked in. If there was anything she might be able to offer him that would let her walk out of this alive, she'd hate it, but she'd do it.

Amycus furrowed his eyebrows. "Ah, here," he said, pulling a bottle of Catechin off of the shelf. Sitting beside it was Chlorquinol, and Amycus ignored Emmeline as he found a tub, opened the bottles, and poured the chemicals into it with little concern over the effects. "They said you liked taking pictures. Mr. Riddle thought it'd be real tragically _beautiful_ if it was your art that killed you." Waving the gun a little he said, "Come the fuck here."

Emmeline swallowed. It seemed time was not her friend. "Is there anything I could do to be allowed to walk out of here?"

"Generous offer," Amycus said. "It's tempting too. But I got strict orders, you see. Don't want to disappoint Mr. Riddle."

"Of course not," Emmeline said, and then wondered if she could keep him near the chemicals and talking long enough for them to make _him_ pass out instead. He was already moving towards her, however, and so she turned and ran for the door.

Amycus caught her around the waist. He was strong, and she was small, and even with her kicking he managed to get a steady arm around her and forced her head down so she was hovering just above the surface of the chemicals.

Emmeline held her breath as long as she could, and when she finally did have to breathe, she turned her head to the side as much as she could and screamed, hoping someone might happen to hear her. She knew both the chemicals were dangerously toxic, but she didn't know what sort of side effects they might have. They were both used in developer, but very rarely as they were so dangerous, and many places didn't stock them anymore.

She started to feel dizzy and nauseous, and then her muscles went weak. Her vision was swimming, and she was sure it wouldn't be long now before she passed out.

"Mmm," Amycus laughed, now restraining her and holding her head forcefully. "Must be tasty, all of those nasty toxic fumes."

"You're breathing them too," she managed before the convulsions started. Her eyes rolled back into her head and she blacked out.

***

Gideon had dragged Fabian out of the house for the first time in _days_ , but Fabian knew he'd been horrible company. They still hadn't found Caradoc, and while Elphias was conscious now and recovering well, Fabian had hardly been able to drag himself to go visit. It wasn't that he didn't want to, but Fabian had been finding it hard to do anything but pester the police for updates on the case, or else try to figure it out himself. Mary had told him where Caradoc's last delivery had been to, and Fabian had been there four times now, always hoping he'd see something each time that both he and the police had missed previously, but there was nothing. There was no trace of him. Fabian had gone to his flat a few times, and let himself in with the key Caradoc had given him, but there were no clues there either. Obviously Caradoc hadn't been home before he'd been taken, and despite the lack of any of his belongings being missing, the police were starting to say he'd just run away. Which Fay knew was total rubbish.

Sighing, Fabian wanted nothing more than to collapse into bed, cell phone at his side, and sleep until he either woke up to his phone ringing with the news of Caradoc's safe return, or until he woke up to find this was all a bad dream.

"Well, thanks for lunch anyway," Fabian said dully as he and his brother made their way to the house.

Gideon nodded absently, and sighed. "I do wish you'd eaten more."

"I wasn't hungry," Fabian said, and then reached out and attached himself to Gideon's arm, wrapping both of his around it, hugging it to himself. "Of all the things you have to worry about, me starving myself isn't one of them. I eat enough."

"I just worry in general," Gideon said as they walked up the driveway. Molly's minivan was missing and Gideon guessed that she was probably out grocery shopping. "Our sister is frighteningly brave," he said, trying to lighten the mood a little. "Instead of waiting for us to come back and watch the kids, she takes off with all seven of them. On _Halloween_. D'you know, Billy slept in his Batman costume last night?"

"Cute," Fabian said, but his voice was dull. He let go of Gideon finally, so Gid could unlock the door. As they walked down the stairs into their basement, Fabian asked, "Are you going out trick or treating with them tonight?"

"Marlene and I promised Arthur we'd help, yeah," Gideon answered, shutting the door behind him. He started walking down the stairs behind his brother, but something didn't feel quite right. It was cold almost. Almost whispering he asked, "Fay, did you leave any windows open?"

"No..." Fabian started, and then froze when three people with guns stepped out of the hallway, shortly followed by three more big, buff men that made their way towards Gid and Fay.

"Oops, that was us. Sorry. But we had to get in somehow, you know?" a tall woman said with a smile. "Hello, boys. Hope you enjoyed your last meal."

" _Son of a bitch_ ," Gideon panicked, tugging Fabian's arm and backing up the stairs.

"I wouldn't bother," a voice said from above them. Craning his neck, Gideon saw the barrel of yet another gun pointed right at them. Christ. Seven on two. Riddle really was a determined fuck, wasn't he?

"Send enough people?" Fabian asked, scared and annoyed and wondering what was going to happen. "I'm almost flattered. So are you here to steal us like you did Caradoc, or try to kill us like you did the Longbottoms and Elphias?"

"We're going to kill you," the woman said casually, and then added, "but for the record, we didn't have anything to do with the others. You two are special."

The three big men pulled out paper and pens and held them out, one of them explaining, "You're going to write suicide notes. Alecto will tell you what they'll say."

Gideon almost laughed. "You're fucking serious? You're going to stage suicide?" he asked, figuring he was stuck where he was and might as well go down fighting. "Does that arsewipe need his ego stroked so badly that he needs to make us look like cowardly failures?"

"You are failures," one of the men behind them said. "You're going to die, so what difference does it make, hmm?"

"Why the hell would we make it easier for you? If you're going to kill us, just shoot us," Fabian said, crossing his arms over his chest. "Murder's a tough charge to shake, I hear."

"You're going to do it," the woman who'd been referred to as Alecto said. "You're going to do it because you have a hell of a higher chance at recovering from an overdose than you do a gunshot wound to the head. Now take the bloody paper."

"Mm, not only are we forced to pretend we're taking the easy way out, but we're skiving masculinity and _overdosing_. Christ almighty. When did I walk into a chick flick?

"Good to know," Gideon answered. "So what're we killing ourselves over, then?"

"You're killing yourself because Marlene left you for Stubby--don't worry, we'll take care of that too--and the swishy one is killing himself because he can't live without his stupid little boyfriend," Alecto answered. "How tragic. And you did it together because you're freakishly attached to each other as it is. So fitting."

"Marlene's leaving me for Stubby Boardman, is she?" Gideon questioned, trying to keep up the bravado even though the colour was draining from his face. Christ he hoped she wouldn't come home while this lot were here. There was nothing he could do for her now. He only hoped that Fabian remembered his handy was in his pocket, and tried to call Molly. "That's what Riddle's 'genius' came up with? Shoot me. Go on. I'm sure as fuck not going to write out that rubbish for you."

Fabian did indeed remember where Gideon's handy was, and while his own was in his bag that he'd have to unzip to get at, he was already shifting as inconspicuously as possible to get a hand in Gid's front pocket without anyone noticing. All he'd have to do was find number one and hold it down. Whoever thought that speed dial might save their lives? If they could distract everyone, and no one heard the noise.

"See, but I don't think you quite understand," the man next to Fabian said. "Things are going to go as planned. That's why we planned them."

Fabian almost had it, and he poked Gideon surreptitiously. He needed a long, loud distraction while he dialled and it rang and Molly answered, and then they'd need to explain the situation without raising suspicions to their would-be killers, and keep them talking long enough for Molly to do something. It was damn near impossible, but Fabian had to have hope it would work.

"Yeah, right," Gideon said, and laughed, straining to drag on the conversation. "And has Riddle planned out his funeral, too? I don't give a fuck what you've planned out. No one who knows one fucking thing about us'll believe that we committed ruddy suicide, notes or not. And then there's the police investigation, and all the evidence you'll be leaving behind, what with your lack of gloves and hands all over the paper, and your dirty boot marks on the carpet... or were you planning on scrubbing before you left?"

Just then, the big bloke next to Fabian grabbed him by the hair, ripping him away from Gideon and slamming him into a wall, big hands going to Fabian's throat.

"You were doing something..." the guy started, but the sudden movement caused Fabian to accidentally pull Gid's cell out as his hand was yanked out, and he found he had no need to finish his accusation.

Alecto bent and picked up the phone, pressing end. Molly hadn't answered yet. It had still been dialling.

"Put a little more pressure on that one, if you know what I mean. I'm done playing nice," Alecto said. "Now sit and write the note, Gideon, or watch your brother turn blue."

Gideon swallowed hard, looked at Fabian, and conceded defeat. Taking the pen and paper and sitting in his chair, he looked at the Alecto woman expectantly. "Well? Dictate, then."

"We're sorry. It's too hard. Marlene left me, and Caradoc's gone, and..." Alecto started, and Gideon wrote forcefully, glaring at the paper.

Fabian struggled against the grip on his throat, trying hard to suck air through the pressure. It was all utter tripe, everything Alecto was saying, and no one would buy it. Not for a moment. Not that it would matter. They'd both be dead.

Fabian's vision swam with the lack of oxygen, and just as things started to go black, he was dropped to the ground. He laid there gasping for a minute until his lungs didn't hurt anymore, and then he looked up at his brother, scared now. "We're not actually doing this, are we?"

"Oh, you are," Alecto said, and a gun was cocked and pointed at each of their heads. She held out two baggies of assorted pills. "You're lucky. It won't hurt. They're mostly painkillers. You'll just go to sleep and never wake up."

"Oh goody, no pain, just death," Gideon said sarcastically. Looking at Fabian he tried to convey a look that said, 'We'll get through this. Alive' but it was hard considering their chances. Gideon's phone rang on the floor. It was probably Molly. Hopefully she'd come home. Not too soon. But not too late, either. "Give me them, then," he added, holding out his hand for the baggy. "Lets get this bullshit over with, shall we, so you can prance along to Riddle? Give him a message for me though? Tell him that just because we'll be dead, doesn't mean the Order is done fighting him."

With that, Gideon grimaced, cupped the baggy, and slid the pills into his mouth, swallowing them down dry.

Fabian, just to be annoying, said, "Get me some water, will you? I can't do it dry. I'd just gag. It'd be a waste of perfectly good pills."

Alecto scowled, but sent someone to go grab him a glass. Fabian took two at a time, going through three refills on his water before they were all down, hoping that the water might slow the effect or something.

He smiled brightly, sat down next to his brother, and said, "Yummy."

"And now we wait until you both pass out," Alecto said with a pained sigh. "How tedious."

"Well sorry to waste your day," Gideon said, woozily. In the time it had taken Fabian to down his pills, Gideon's had had opportunity to set in and he was getting really, _really_ tired. "Are... are some of these fast acting?" he asked, blinking and then rubbing at his eyes.

"Wouldn't want to be inefficient!" Alecto quipped. "Some of them are also sleeping pills."

Fabian wished now that he'd downed his all fast. By the looks of it, by the time he passed out, Gideon would already be out cold. Maybe Fabian could fake it once Gid was out. Maybe they'd leave while he was still conscious and he could call Molly or the medics or _something_.

"Start cleaning up the evidence," Alecto instructed her lackeys, keeping only two armed men with her to watch Gideon and Fabian fade. "You know, there's a certain point where you've absorbed all the medication, and even having your stomach pumped won't be able to do anything for you. With that particular cocktail, that point is about three quarters of an hour after you pass out. It's nice and fast. There won't be enough time to get help. Do you have any idea how long it takes to grocery shop with seven children?"

"Yes, actually," Gideon said, closing his eyes and resting his head on the back of the sofa. "Billy and Charlie broke open three watermelons before I'd realized they were gone. I don't. I. Where's m'wife?" Gideon slurred, blinking at Fabian slowly, looking a little confused. "Fay? Fabian. Love... you. Little brother."

Tears came to Fabian's eyes then, as their odds finally sunk in. "Shut up," he said, and then buried his head against Gideon's shoulder, squeezing him impossibly tightly and ignoring the laughter from the others. They didn't matter. He didn't care what they thought, not at all. Not when he was possibly watching his brother die. A sob bubbled up in his throat and shook his body against his brother's. "Shut up, Gideon. It'll be fine. We'll be fine. I love you too. Everything's fine."

"Kinny's gonna... pissed. Dying on her," Gideon mumbled. "Tried, though. Didn't. We?"

Fabian's own head began to feel light and he squeezed his eyes shut. He felt like he hadn't slept in days, and he knew time was running out. "Marlene loves you. She's strong. She'll be... fine. Everything'll be fine. Gideon?"

There was no answer. Time was running out. That thought kept echoing in Fabian's head, and he reluctantly pulled away from his unconscious brother. Time was running out. Do something. Time was running out. Don't let Gideon die.

So, he lurched to his feet and stumbled towards Alecto and the others, falling to his hands and knees and landing near Gideon's phone on the floor. He knew there were guns pointed at him, and he hoped it didn't seem to obvious where he'd fallen, but he wanted to be close. He couldn't just let Gideon _die_.

"Please. You can tell Riddle I begged," Fabian mumbled, bringing one hand up to press against his forehead in an attempt to stop the spinning. "You can tell him whatever you want. Just. Don't... do this. Please..."

Alecto swallowed. She wasn't a murderer, at least not until now, but orders were orders. She watched as Fabian collapsed at their feet, begging and weak and drooling. And desperate. She ignored him. "Ready to go, boys? I think we're nearly done here."

The six men didn't argue. They just put their guns away, and followed Alecto up the basement stairs and out the door.

As they left, Fabian fumbled for the phone, his vision swimming and his hands shaking and it took him longer this time, with it right there in front of him, to find the number one. It took both his thumbs for him to find the strength to press it and hold it, and it only rang once before Fabian passed out, phone in hand.

Marlene rode up on her bike just in time to see seven people come up from the basement. She didn't like the look of them, and had no idea why'd they'd be there anyway, but they spotted her before she could do anything at all. The woman, for there was only one, gestured at her, and six men swiftly began towards her. Marlene got back on her bike and rode as fast as she could, but she didn't even reach the end of the driveway before she was grabbed by strong arms around the waist.

She tried to scream, too, but a damp cloth was clamped down over her nose and mouth. In three sharp, scared breaths, everything went black.

***

Blinking blearily, Marlene came to, her head bouncing against someone's broad shoulder with the movements of the car. Her mouth felt dry, and she tried to bring a hand up to push her hair out of her face, but found she couldn't.

Rather suddenly, her memories came back to her, and she jerked straight upright, wincing at the pain of her hands bound behind her. "What the fuck is going on?"

"Morning, sunshine," a man in the passenger seat said. "You're going to a reunion, of sorts, Mrs Prewett."

"Where's Gideon? And Fabian? What were you doing in their house?" Marlene demanded, glaring at her captors, but the panic was quickly rising.

"Oh they've been taken care of," the man answered. "We were just making sure they wouldn't miss you while you're in Liverpool."

"What did you do?" Marlene asked, voice low. They didn't answer her, and so she lifted her feet, which she found were also tied together, and slammed them against the back of the driver's seat. "What did you do to them? Tell me!"

"Knock her out again," the man instructed to the bulky bloke sitting beside Marlene. "Lets make sure she's nice and groggy so she can't run away from Mr. Boardman."

"Stubby?" Marlene asked, shocked. "What does he have to do with any of this? Get away from me, you freakish brute. Touch me and I swear I'll bite your fingers off."

When he just smirked at her and doused a rag with some liquid from a bottle the man in the passenger seat passed him, she twisted in her seat and got her feet up, ignoring the discomfort this caused with her laying back against her bound hands, and tried to knee or kick the man. If she was going down, she was at least going to cause anyone she could as much pain as she could manage.

She managed to kick the man with the cloth in the nose before he got a decent hold on her and pressed the rag to her mouth. She slumped back over and the rest of the ride was in silence. Pulling in the old junk yard just outside of Liverpool that they'd told Boardman to meet them in, the man in the passenger seat climbed out first. "Evening, Mr. Boardman."

"About fucking time," Stubby said. "What, did you take a detour to Russia?"

"Delicate situations take time," he replied. "We received word from our contact inside that you wore Vol de Mort in your shoot for Rolling Stone. So we've brought you McKinnon, as agreed. She's asleep now. I need to discuss private details with you. Crouch will transfer her to your car if you'll follow me for a moment."

"Private details?" Stubby questioned, but followed the man just the same.

After leading them around the corner of the building, just out of sight of the two cars, the man seemingly in charge began to speak, doing nothing more than wasting time for the others to get the plans in motion. Junior Crouch was fast and quiet and he wouldn't need much time. "Marlene was lead to believe something had happened to Mr. Prewett, and she would be brought to you for comfort. It is likely she will be distressed when she wakes up."

In actuality, by the time Stubby woke up, he would be handcuffed to the steering wheel and watching a timer count down to his death.

***

"Marlene! Wake the fuck up!" Stubby screamed, struggling to kick the passenger side window open from where he sat, handcuffed to the steering wheel. Fucking double crossers had smiled as they'd left him stranded, telling him some shit about being greedy and involving himself with a girl who'd pissed off the wrong people. He'd been screaming obscenities ever since, and despite the noise, Marlene _wasn't waking up_. The timer sitting on the dashboard was ticking down to the time _something_ was going to happen. Stubby assumed they were blowing up the car. What else was there to assume? Either way he knew that he had _get Marlene out_ or they were _both_ going to die.

Marlene came to in the backseat of a car for the second time that afternoon, with a splitting headache and her hands, once again, tied behind her. She caught up quicker this time, though her brain felt slower. It was an odd feeling. "Ow, fuck. Shut up, my head hurts. What the fuck is going on, Stubby?"

"Oh, nothing much!" Stubby shouted still hitting his foot against the window. "Only, you know, you're going to die if I don't break this God! Damn! Window!" Each exclamation was punctuated with a hard, forceful kick to the glass. "Jesus!" Stubby screamed, and kicked once again, the glass finally smashing under his trainer. "Marlene, you've got to get out. _Get out_!"

"What are you... what're you talking about?" she asked, sitting up and attempting to manoeuvre herself into the front seat without proper use of her arms or legs. "Is that a bomb? Fucking hell, is that a... What the fuck did you do, Stubby?"

"Made a _really_ big mistake, Marlene, and I'm fucking sorry, but we don't have time to talk about how I'm the biggest mistake of your life, okay? Riddle was using me to get you, and _I don't want you to die_ so get the hell out! Now!"

Marlene stared at him for a moment from her spot awkwardly flopped against the passenger side door, legs still half in the back seat, and then made a decision. "I'm not going to leave you here. There's got to be a way to get you free."

"In the next minute, while I'm hand-cuffed to the bitch? I think I'm done for, actually," Stubby said. "So stop it, okay? This isn't a we both go or we both snuff it sort of deal, Christ. You want to go out, and live your life, and make babies with Prewett and all of that bullshit, then climb out the window and go! I think something's happened to him, but. But Gid's... he's tough. And he's not going to be able to do anything without you."

"Stubby..." Marlene said softly, eyes welling up. "Is this for real? Is this actually for real? I can't... it doesn't feel real. I'm not going to leave you here to be blown up..."

"Do you think you're fucking hallucinating?" Stubby asked. "Marlene. Listen to me. _Get out_. You could've been around the God damn block by now. I'm... I'm sorry," he spat again suddenly. "I made a lot of bad choices and mistakes with you, Marlene, and Christ I'm sorry I didn't do it right. I'm such a fucking idiot." Time was winding down and Stubby felt his breath catch in his throat as panic started to set in because she had to get out _now_ or it wouldn't matter at _all_.

"I loved you. I really did. But I'm dead now, and you're alive, and you need to go, and you'll have Gideon if you'll just get _out_!"

Marlene didn't know if she could live with herself if she just left him there, but she knew she wouldn't have the chance to find out if she didn't take his advice and get out _now_. The timer was clicking down, and it was too damn close the single digits for her liking. "I loved you too, in my own way. I'm so sorry, Stubby. I..."

There was no time, though. She hoisted herself up and scraped the shit out of her back on the remaining glass as she pushed herself from the car.

She wasn't quite clear when it all blew sky high.

***

Dorcas stared at herself in the mirror. She looked pale and young and defenceless. She didn't really miss her red hair most of the time, but she did right now. It had always sort of advertised to people that she was wild and strong and fearless, and it had made it easier to act that way.

Now, though, she was just pregnant and worried and _fucking terrified_.

Everyone had heard about James and Lily's accident, but no one knew any details, and both the police and the hospital were refusing to answer anyone's questions. No one could reach Gideon or Fabian, either, and it was all too much.

"Are you sure we have to go?" Dorcas asked Ed, turning away from the mirror to look at him. "We could reschedule. They'd understand. I don't want to go out today. I have a bad feeling about today."

Edgar sighed. "I don't want to go either, Dor, but this is the last one before next week," he said. "And I'm working until then. I don't know when I'd be able to take you. But if you really don't want to go..."

"It's getting so close," Dorcas said instead of answering, running a hand over her belly. She was wearing a long-sleeved, dark blue t-shirt that had small lime green polka dots and some jeans low cut enough to ride below her bulge. They were her comfortable clothes. The shirt had frayed cuffs and the jeans had holes in the knees and butt pockets, but she didn't care. She'd rather be comfortable. She was due within the next few weeks, but they didn't know exactly when she'd conceived, so they couldn't pinpoint an exact day. She really shouldn't skip the appointment. She wanted to make sure everything was on track. "Can we walk there though? I just... I don't want to drive today. Please?"

"Okay," Edgar agreed, and certainly didn't object to leaving the car where it was in light of what had happened that morning. He sincerely doubted that Riddle's people'd be stupid enough to go after them in town, in broad daylight, so the faster they managed to get from Mercy River to Queen Elizabeth Street, the better. "Ma, we're leaving now! And we're walking!"

"Be careful!" Anna called back.

"We will. I've got my cell too, if you need us," Dor called as she pulled on a fluffy parka Anna had gotten for her at a thrift store when the weather started turning cold. "Bye Suz!"

"Bye Dory," Susan said, looking up from her dolls with a shy smile. The girl had taken to calling Dorcas after the character from Finding Nemo.

"Bye Susan," Edgar said, grinning at his niece as he opened the door.

"Bye Eddie," Susan answered quietly, still smiling.

Dorcas and Ed stepped out into the chilly October afternoon, and Dorcas promptly took Edgar's hand, looking around for anything suspicious. She just had a bad feeling. "Let's walk fast, all right? A little exercise would do me good anyway."

"Well you're not fat, you're pregnant," Edgar said, but picked up the pace anyway, holding Dor's hand tightly. "And I doubt exercise'd make much difference at this point anyhow."

"Do you think James and Lily are okay?" Dorcas asked, changing the subject abruptly. "I heard Remus has Harry, but supposedly he's been at the hospital all day so no one's been able to get in touch with him. Do you think we should go down there after this?"

"If you like," Edgar said. "I wonder where Sirius is? Mrs Norfolk down the street was telling Ma that she and her husband saw Sirius there."

"Saw him where? At James and Lily's?" Dorcas asked, surprised.

"Yeah, talking to some bloke they didn't know at the end of James' driveway," Edgar answered.

"That's fucking weird," Dorcas said softly. "I don't like this shit, Bonesie. What the fuck sort of situation have we landed ourselves in if I ever have to wonder if a mate of mine might've killed his best mates? Not that I think Sirius did. He's not the spy, I don't think."

"I don't know," Edgar answered softly. "I'm sure there's a reason why he was there. I'd just like to know who it was he was talking to. And James and Lily... until someone says so, I'm going to ignore it. They'll be fine."

"Of course they'll be fine. They're parents. Harry needs parents," Dorcas said, and maybe this reasoning was irrational, but it made sense to her.

They were approaching the Mercy River Bridge. Dorcas loved Mercy River. It was deep but slow, and actually fairly clean. In the summer, if she was too hot, she'd walk up and wade in. It was close enough to Ed's house that it didn't matter if she got all her clothes wet.

"When we get married, can we take some wedding pictures here? It's such a pretty little bridge," Dorcas said softly, letting go of Ed's hand to wrap an arm around his waist, pulling his arm up over her shoulder with her other hand.

"If you like," Edgar agreed, thinking of the ring box sitting in a drawer at home, wrapped up in a pair of his socks. He still hadn't given it to her, because he hadn't figured out the right way to ask. Looking at the bridge and blowing leaves, and listening to the sound of the running water, Edgar wished he'd remembered to bring it with him. This seemed like the perfect place. Impulsively he turned and kissed the side of her head, smiling into her hair. "I love you," he said quietly, then added, " _Princess_."

Dorcas blinked up at him, and then grinned widely, unable to stop herself. That was the first time he'd called her Princess since the whole... mess she'd made. She'd assumed he just didn't think of her as his princess anymore. Hearing him say it though, made her really, really happy. "I love you too, Bonesie."

Impulsively, Dorcas pulled him up to her favourite spot on the bridge--a little wrought iron bench in the middle of the bridge, in a little section that jutted out from the bridge so that the bench wasn't in the way of the walking path. "Okay, so, I have a confession. I found the ring. It's beautiful and I love it, and I know it's in your sock drawer, but just pretend you have it and propose anyway."

Edgar laughed at Dorcas' admission. "You know, you're one of a kind. There's no one like you in the world, and even though I've learned to expect the unexpected from you, you still surprise me _every time_. I love that about you. I love that we're so different but that we make it work, somehow. I love that even though we're so young, and stupid, and kind of naive, we still plunge onward anyway, no matter what the outcome might be because... well it doesn't matter so long as we have one another, does it?" Figuring--ring or not--that he might as well do things semi-properly, Edgar took her hands in his and got down on one knee, grinning shyly up at her.

"Dorcas, you're everything to me. You're my second half, the mother of my child, and everything that makes my day worthwhile. You're my princess, and I love you more than I think I could properly express with words. Will you marry me?"

Dorcas sat down on the bench and took his face in both hands, kissing him. Lips lingering next to his, she whispered, "Of course I'll marry you. I love you more than life."

Loud, slow clapping interrupted their happy moment, and someone called dryly, "Oh, _bravo_. How sweet. I almost hate to interrupt."

Edgar turned his head slowly. Oh, _shit_. Standing up and pulling Dorcas to her feet with him, Edgar started backing them away from two darkly clothed men. "Dorcas, run."

"Noble of you, Mr Bones," someone from behind them said. "But rest assured neither of you are going anywhere. Except down, of course."

"You lot can just fuck right off, actually. You ruined my proposal," Dorcas snapped, glaring at the three men surrounding them. "And unless you fancy losing limbs, you're not touching either of us."

The men laughed then, and began closing in. Dorcas kicked the closest one as hard as she could, and as soon as one grabbed her around the middle, she screamed and began scratching at his face. Suddenly, there was a knife at her throat and she froze.

"Ed?" she called. She couldn't see him from the way she'd ended up facing, and the blade biting into her neck made the situation all the more real. She was no match against even one of the men, and that was all it took now to hold her.

"Not so tough anymore, are you, Dorcas?" the man holding her whispered in her ear, and she shuddered. She hoped he had giant gouges out of his facial skin from her fingernails. Creep.

"Let her go!" Edgar shouted, restrained by another man, arms twisted hard behind his back and a knife pressed into his own neck. "She's pregnant, Christ, how fucked up are you? Let her go!"

"We could always take the baby out for you," the man restraining Dorcas said, slowly lowering the blade from her neck to her stomach. "Get it all done in one go? Would that be more convenient for you?"

"Leave her alone!" Edgar screamed, shaking against the arms of the man holding him.

Dorcas swallowed and closed her eyes. She didn't think she'd ever been this scared in her life, but mostly she was scared for Ed and the baby. She didn't want him to do something stupid trying to protect her and get himself hurt. They were being held at knife point, for fuck's sake. If they could just stop anything bad from happening, someone was bound to drive by eventually. Or walk. Or... something. Nonetheless...

"If you hurt my baby, I swear to all that is fucking holy I will peel all the skin off of your gonads with my fucking teeth. Get that knife the fuck away from me," Dorcas growled.

The man seemed to hesitate and then moved the knife back to Dorcas' throat. "Don't worry. We're not actually going to gut you. We're just going to drown you."

"Oh _Jesus_ ," Edgar breathed, trying to stall them however he could, his eyes on Dorcas. If they'd let her go it wouldn't matter what they did with him. They just couldn't kill her and the baby. What sort of heartless people were they? "Come on, you don't fucking have to do this. This is _murder_!"

"Good thing we're not overly fond of morals," the third man--who'd been hovering--said with a laugh.

"This baby hasn't even breathed one breath yet," Dorcas said. "How can you even _think_ of ending a life before it's even started? You're all fucking wankers. Let us go."

Instead of reply, the man holding Dorcas just raised the hand with the knife in it and hit her hard on the back of the head with the heavy handle. Dorcas swore and tried to elbow him in the stomach, and he hit her twice more before apparently hitting the right spot. She dropped like a rock at his feet.

"Dor! You sons-of-bitches, let me go!" Edgar shouted, starting to hyperventilate. "Leave her alone!"

"Now do him so we can throw them over and get out of here," he said quickly, pocking his knife and starting to drag Dorcas closer to the railing.

The man restraining Edgar copied what Dorcas' captor had done, but with a little more difficulty as Edgar wrestled against him, trying to free himself before they could throw Dorcas over the bridge. The bloke finally managed it, however, and Edgar fell to the ground, out cold.

One of the men poked Edgar with his toe, as if to check he was actually unconscious, and then sighed. "Throw them over. Fast. I want to get out of here. We took too long and let them make too much noise as it is."

Between them, the three men shifted Edgar and Dorcas, one after the other, over the stone bridge and into the cold water. They only waited long enough to make sure neither had come to, and that there had been no witnesses, before they fled.

***

"I have the headache from hell. Fix me a drink, Rodolphus?" Bella called as she came into the apartment. "You would not _believe_ the day I had. Tommy had a temper tantrum and pushed some nobody mail boy down the stairs and he ended up in the hospital, so I had to meet with the lawyers and the PR people and the kid's family, and the kid's family's lawyer, and our lawyers again, and then our PR people again, and of course the kid's family and their lawyer again, and finally I convinced them not to press charges. It was such a mess. Why can't Tommy be like how he was when we met him? I loved that Tommy. This Tommy is just a fucked up mental case. Drink, Rodolphus, where is it?"

"Bellatrix," Rodolphus said quietly, turning his head to look at her as she walked into the den where he was sitting watching television. "Never mind a drink. After you hear this you're going to need a sedative."

"Well, spit it out then," Bellatrix said and sat down at his side. 

"Well, first off, James and Lily Potter were run off the road this morning on their way to Kingsbridge," Rodolphus started, and laughed a little because he still couldn't fathom that this was happening. "Emmeline Vance was found by her fiancé on the floor of a dark room. Turns out she was forced to huff some pretty potent chemicals." The look on Bella's face was changing from confusion to sudden, half-horrified understanding, and Rodolphus plunged onward. "Gideon and Fabian Prewett's sister found them in their basement. Pills. Staged suicide, I believe. And then a car exploded on the other side of Liverpool. Stubby Boardman was fried to a crisp and for some reason unknown to me they found Prewett's wife with him. And Edgar Bones and Dorcas Meadows were dragged up from the bottom of a river in Salcombe."

"Fuck," Bellatrix said softly. "He did it. I'm assuming the police will put it all together by nightfall and we'll be arrested by morning on suspicion. It's only a matter of time before they actually find grounds to jail us on."

"Mm," Rodolphus agreed. "Calling him a 'fucked up mental case' doesn't quite sum it up anymore, I don't think. I'd like to personally find whoever was stupid enough to follow out such insane orders. Off them all at once... Jesus Christ."

"He didn't tell me," Bellatrix said softly, sounding shocked as the thought registered belatedly. "He used to tell me everything. He kept this from me."

"Probably knew you'd try to talk some sense into him," Rodolphus said. "Not a big fan of sense, from what I can see."

"This may be our last night of freedom. Do we really want to spend it talking about Tommy?" Bellatrix asked mischievously.

"No, I think not," Rodolphus said. "I'm sure we'll spend the rest of our lives talking about him. What did you have in mind?"

"How long has it been since you did a line of coke straight off of my skin?" Bellatrix asked, voice sultry as she trailed the tip of one finger down his neck. "I have some in a baggie in the bathroom, along with some ecstasy if you're not too scared to mix."

" _Never_ ," Rodolphus grinned, leaning into her touch and kissing the side of her hand.

"Than let's party," Bellatrix replied and kicked off her shoes before she got to her feet. Her shirt was off before she left the room, and by the time she reached the bathroom, she was in only her bra and underwear.

If it was going to be their last night of freedom, they might as well go out with a bang.

***

Things used to be so much simpler when they were younger, and Peter missed it. Even if he'd hated school and a lot of the time he was miserable, he'd give anything to go back to East Portlemouth Prep days. Those were the days when he wasn't an accessory to God knows what and he hadn't lied to anyone, or sold them out. He still had friends, even if they weren't always nice to him.

Peter wished suddenly that he'd gone to see Remus instead of coming to the docks to watch ferries carry people between East Portlemouth and Salcombe. This would probably be the last chance he had to talk to Remus before Remus found out what he'd done and hated him, just like the others would hate him. Remus had always been so nice...

Well. No point thinking about it now.

Peter sighed and stuffed his hands into his pockets and wondered where he was going to go after this. He couldn't stay in Salcombe. He didn't have a lot of money saved from his time with Vol de Mort Fashions, since they'd mostly paid him by giving him an apartment and clothes and girls. He didn't even really have enough to live off of for more than a month. (He would've had more, but he'd blown it on trivial things like stupidly expensive sunglasses and teeth whitening treatments.) It'd have to make do, though. He didn't have any other options. He was practically a criminal. Depending on what Mr. Riddle was going to do to James and Lily, he might _actually_ be a criminal.

What a stupid, stupid mess.

Sirius was ready to explode. He'd looked everywhere for that fucking _rat_ , from his mother's house to the grocery store, and Sirius still hadn't found him. Sirius had pretty well decided that he was going to kill Peter for killing James and Lily--for _orphaning_ Harry--and that was that. He deserved what was coming to him. And then, on top of the hate and the pain and the grief and the image of James' bloody face, there was just _so much_ guilt for not having put two and two together before and realizing what was going on.

He could've stopped this from happening.

Sirius accelerated.

The last place he'd thought to look was the docks. There was no where else left unless Peter had scampered off to the sewers with the rest of the vermin.

Pulling around the corner, Sirius spotted him. There the sick little fuck was. Righteous anger welled in every inch of Sirius' being and he stopped the bike, hopping off and running toward Peter shouting, "You _miserable_ fucking shit! You _killed_ them, do you hear me?"

Peter whirled around, eyes wide. "Sirius! I, I, I... They're _dead_?"

That was even worse than the worst case scenario Peter had dared to dread. He hadn't wanted anyone hurt, at least not that badly. He hadn't... oh god... James and Lily were... His knees went weak and Peter fell with an _oof_ to the pavement before realizing Sirius was getting closer and going to hurt him, so then Peter started trying to struggle in the general direction of _away_.

"I d-d-didn't know, I swear," he said weakly, scared. Sirius was practically on top of him then. "Help! Help me!"

"Liar!" Sirius said as he immediately started punching Peter in the face with all the force he could muster. "You fucking sold out your friends! And for _what_?" He gritted his teeth. "Pussy? Money? Explain it to me Peter!"

Peter tried his best to shield his face from Sirius, still shouting in the hopes that someone would come help. "It, i-i-it all got out of h-hand. I n-never meant for..."

A couple of guys at the other end of the parking lot had heard and were coming running, but Sirius was still hitting him and he was so mad, Peter wasn't sure they'd be able to stop him anyway.

"You n-never liked me!" Peter shouted finally, blood spraying out with his words. "You d-didn't respect me. They o-offered me that. You n-never c-cared, so why should I?"

"Oh _fuck you_ ," Sirius screamed. "Fuck you and your self-depreciating _bullshit_ , Peter! When it came down to it we would've done fucking anything for you! We're not kids anymore!"

Peter looked up at Sirius, a mixture of sadness and anger and resentment in his eyes, but by then, the other men had arrived and pulled Sirius off of him. In a moment of desperate panic, Peter decided to try and turn it around and blame Sirius. "I know w-what you d-did. Un-unless you're going to kill me right h-here, I'm g-going to tell the police! It's y-your fault th-they're dead!"

"My fault?" Sirius wheezed, and it all seemed to hit him at once instead of taking turns like his emotions had been doing for the entire day. He started to cry. "Oh _Christ_ ," he sobbed. "James. God. I'm so fucking sorry."

Just then, a police car happened to pull up. Peter briefly remembered all the inventive ways they'd hid their weed to bring back to East Portlemouth Prep after a Salcombe weekend because the police regularly patrolled the ferry, but he pushed the memories from his mind and focussed on what had to be done. He might actually be able to pull this off.

"Police! Flag th-them d-down!" Peter instructed the confused looking bystanders, and as soon as the policeman opened his door, Peter began to speak, voice seeming to lose it's stutter as he fell back into the role of liar and deceptor extraordinaire. "You need to arrest this man for assault! His name is Sirius Black, and I think he might also be accessory to murder."

"Black, you say?" the officer asked, surveying the crying Sirius with interest. They were speculating that a Sirius Black might have had a hand in the car crash earlier that morning--he'd been on scene, then he'd taken off.

Peter nodded.

"Both of you get in the car. We're taking you in for questioning."


	35. Champagne Supernova, Part B (October 31st, 2007)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Where there is... you'll see.

"Those two car crash victims from this morning, did they survive surgery?"

"Just barely. The wife is in worse shape than the husband, and on top of it, she was pregnant. It was touch and go for a while, but..."

"Lost the baby, huh?"

"Yeah."

"Well, you did all you could."

***

"Is she okay? Please, tell me. I'm just as tired of harassing you as you are of being harassed."

"Mr. Toggles, just because you're a celebrity doesn't mean I'm privy to give you information that's only supposed to be released to family."

"I'm her fiancé. She lives with me. Her father is getting here as fast as he can, all right? I don't want to know the technical bullshit, I just want to know if she's alive and if she's going to be okay, because she's my entire life!"

"Fine. She's alive, yes. She'll recover. We'll tell you more when her father arrives. And Mr. Toggles?"

"Oh Christ. Thank you. And... and what?"

"If you were married, it wouldn't be a problem. Think about it."

***

"The short of it is, by the time we got to them, it was too late to pump their stomachs. Luckily, we were able to control, minimize, and counteract the effects of the pills through various other means."

"You mean they're going to be okay?"

"Yes, Mrs. Weasley. They're going to be okay."

"Oh thank heavens! Oh, Arthur, Gid and Fay are going to be okay!"

"However, they will be held for a few days for observation. Once they stabilize, they'll be moved to the psychiatric ward and separated..."

"Why on earth would you do that?"

"Ma'am. They tried to commit suicide together. It's..."

"That wasn't suicide. My brothers are _not_ suicidal."

"There was a note, Mrs. Weasley."

"And it was total balderdash! I know my brothers, and they're not suicidal!"

"Ma'am..."

"Let me in to see them then. I'll get you an explanation."

"They're not awake yet."

"But you said..."

"They're _going_ to be okay. They have quite a long way to go yet."

***

"Ah, you're awake. Wonderful. I'm Dr Carter, dear, and I'm going to ask you a few questions, okay? Do you think you're able to answer them for me?"

"Is Gideon here? I want Gid. Ow, shit. Is Stubby okay? What happened to him?"

"No, no, ma'am, stay where you are, don't sit up, you're going to disturb the wounds. We'll get to the other things after, okay? Now can you tell me your name?"

"Marlene McKinnon-Prewett. It's Halloween, or maybe the day after. And yes, I remember what happened. That's probably what you were going to ask, right? My turn. Is Gideon here, and did Stubby live?"

"Well. It seems I've got my hands full. I'm afraid that Mr Boardman didn't make it. Now, I take it 'Gideon' is your husband, correct?"

"Yes. Gideon is my husband. Is he okay? They... I thought they might have..."

"Calm down, Mrs. Prewett. Now, now, take a deep breath, sweetheart. Your husband is alive. He's in the hospital in Salcombe. We tried to contact him and were told as such, although the details couldn't be released until you came around. We'll allow you the opportunity to phone home and find out as soon as we can."

"Stubby's dead, Gideon's in the hospital. And I... am in a, shit, a really lot of..."

"Oh dear. Nurse? Nurse! We'll need an OR prepared as soon as possible, and see that Mrs. Prewett is prepared for her second surgery. And hurry!"

***

"Mr. Bones? I just heard back from the doctors doing the surgery. Your girlfriend is going to be fine. She's not awake yet, but as soon as your doctor gives you one last check over, I can take you down to see the baby."

"Thank _God_. And, uh. She's my fiancé, actually. Um. How's the baby? She's okay, right?"

"She's very healthy. There appear to be no complications from the oxygen deprivation, though more conclusive tests will have to be done. You are now the father of a six pounds, four ounces baby girl. You, your fiancé, and your baby were all very lucky."

"No kidding. Oh Christ. Father. This definitely was not how I thought it was going to happen. I thought Dorcas and I would be conscious for it, for one thing. And she's only six pounds? That's not very big, is it?"

"It's not too small. It's typical for premature babies to be a little underweight, and she wasn't due until next month. It isn't anything to be worried about."

"Wow. Jesus that's overwhelming. I have a daughter. A daughter! ...Michele Rocket."

"Pardon?"

"Her name. The baby, that's her name. Michele Rocket."


	36. The New Maybe (November 2nd, 2007)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Where there is tears, laughter, and baby puke.

Caradoc was fairly certain that he was starting to go mad.

He could barely open his eyes anymore, and he'd lost track of the days. He didn't try to fight the ropes anymore; they were wound tightly still around his wrists and ankles, stained with blood from his constant rubbing and the wrestling he'd done with the chair. They'd come back twice with measly amounts of food and water that Caradoc had swallowed as quickly as he could, and that he'd thrown up soon after they'd left.

So the smell of vomit lingered in his nostrils, and his mouth tasted like mouldy cotton, and the flies were rampant in the vomit and it was so disgusting and horrible that Caradoc spent the majority of the time he wasn't attempting sleep closing his eyes and calling for help. Not that it made any difference, because the loudest volume of his voice barely echoed around the factory floor, and lately the smallest volume--a croaky whisper--had been all he'd been able to manage.

Caradoc was also fairly certain that he was going to die before anyone found him.

"Dude, it smells fucking rank down here."

"I don't know if we should be here. This place looks like it could collapse at any minute."

"Stop being such a baby. This is cool. No one will even notice if we trash the place."

Caradoc blinked. _People_? Oh God. "H-hello?" he tried, his voice small and tired and hoarse. "Help?" he managed, a little louder this time, and tried shaking the chair so that the legs clacked against the cement floor. "Help!"

"What the fuck is that?"

The two boys exchanged a look and made their way tentatively towards the sound, each picking up a piece of wood from the various bits of rubbish around the basement.

"Holy shit, dude," the boy with the longer hair said. "It's a dude. Tied to a chair."

"Thanks captain obvious," the smaller boy said, and dropped his stick, moving until he was right in front of Caradoc. "Shit, are you okay? Call an ambulance, Graham."

"What day is it?" Caradoc asked.

"Friday," the boy answered, and began working to untie Caradoc.

"Dude, maybe we shouldn't," Graham said.

"Shouldn't what?"

Graham looked uncomfortable. "Help him."

"What are you talking about? He looks half dead!"

"Yeah, but dude. Look, my brother's in a fucking gang, okay? You don't know how shit like this works. If he's marked, and we help him and get people in trouble, we're fucking dead, all right? C'mon, Will. We should just go and make like we were never here."

"It's not a gang," Caradoc said hoarsely, annoyed despite his delirium. "It's Vol de Mort. I was k-kidnapped."

"Vol de Mort?" Graham snorted. "That fucking fashion fairy?"

"Who _cares_ who did it," Will snapped. "Call the medics, and the police while you're at it."

***

Caradoc shifted between the cool, white sheets of the hospital bed. Reaching to the table beside him for water that had been left there, Caradoc drained the bottle. Since getting here and being treated his thirst had become almost unable to satisfy, so that when he wasn't drinking he was pissing like a racehorse. His parents had come in, much to his surprise; his mother had sobbed and his father had apologized and said that they would talk more about things later, and that Liam, his brother, was going to come visit him soon.

It was a little surreal to Caradoc that it had taken a near-death experience for his family to learn to accept him in any way.

But the doctors and nurses still told him little about what had happened to Fabian, just that he was in the hospital and they couldn't see one another yet, but they'd be able to, soon, once everything was all sorted out. It was absolute rubbish in Caradoc's opinion, and he'd tried to sneak out of his hospital room to find Fabian a number of times, but he always got caught.

Fabian hadn't been told any more than Caradoc had, though thanks to a few nurses he'd been able to sweet talk, he knew that Cara had been trying, unsuccessfully, to sneak in to see him. Fabian had a feeling all this lock and key had something to do with the fact that this whole mess would bring down Riddle and Vol de Mort, and they wanted everyone's stories untainted, but Fabian didn't much care.

He just wanted to see Cara, and Gid wanted to see Marlene. When the Prewett brothers put their minds to something, there wasn't much that could stop them. Besides, they had Molly running interference, and along with her pack of children, she could cause _quite_ a distraction.

So after a little planning and a lot of noise, Gideon and he broke out of the psych ward (which Fabian found hilariously poetic) to go to their respective other halves.

When Fabian finally opened the door and stepped into Caradoc's room, he wasted no time shutting it behind him and climbing into Cara's bed.

"I've missed you," he breathed, eyes welling up as he wrapped himself around Caradoc. "I was so worried."

" _Fabian_ ," Caradoc said with relief, surprised, nuzzling his face in the crook of Fabian's neck and kissing the skin there. "The way they were talking about you when they first brought me in..."

"I'm okay and you're okay," Fabian said, and then pressed a desperate kiss to Caradoc's lips before he continued speaking. "You're never, ever to scare me like that again, got it? I don't even care if I sound like a woman saying it. I need you, Cara. You're my man."

Caradoc smiled. "I won't. I think I'll be trusting my instincts from now on. I love you, Fabian. So, _so_ much."

"I love you too," Fabian replied, snuggling closer to Caradoc and squeezing him even tighter. If anyone found them, they'd certainly have a time getting Fabian to let go, that was for sure. "So unbelievably much."

"Are we in America yet?" Caradoc asked with a laugh. "I'm not sure how much more of England I can handle."

"I think you're going to have to tough it out for a little while longer. We have a hell of a trial ahead of us," Fabian said. "But it'll be okay as long as we're together, right?"

"Of course it will be," Caradoc replied, kissing Fabian again and feeling as though it was completely impossible to get enough of him at this very moment, after going for so long without him.

***

There were machines beeping all around him. James and Lily were in beds at the other end of the room, and Harry was sleeping in his arms. The poor kid had twelve stitches holding a jagged gash on his head shut.

When Remus had arrived, the police had been trying to get Rachel and Leonard out of the room to ask them some questions, but of course they'd refused to leave poor Harry alone, so Remus had taken over for them until the police were done with them.

Harry technically should be in his crib considering he'd just been through a nasty car crash, but he wouldn't stop crying and other than the cut on his forehead, there were no other problems that Remus would be upsetting by holding him. It had only taken ten minutes for Harry to fall asleep once Remus had him. And now Remus was left sitting alone in James and Lily's room, with Harry drooling on his shoulder and tears running down his cheeks.

Sirius had been arrested. Peter was in protective custody. James, Lily, Gideon, Fabian, Caradoc, Edgar, and Dorcas were all here in the hospital, and Marlene and Emmeline were in intensive care in Liverpool. They wouldn't let him see Sirius or Peter, and no one would tell him what was happening. All he knew was that they thought Sirius was responsible. Sirius, of all people.

Remus just tightened his grip on Harry and quietly had a breakdown.

He wanted to talk to Sirius, and he wanted for James and Lily to wake up, and he wanted everyone to be okay, but he couldn't do anything. He was completely powerless.

***

What a nightmare this had been. And dear _God_ how much worse it could've been. They were so lucky to still have James, and Lily, and poor little Harry who'd been calling for his mother every time he'd been able to get the words out when he wasn't sleeping or crying. Leonard had taken him somewhere away from the distraction of his parents unmoving bodies, and Remus was speaking with the police, and Rachel _would_ not believe that Sirius had anything whatsoever to do with this horrible, horrible thing. The idea was absolutely laughable, and if Rachel had it in her to laugh, she would've.

She was sitting in the chair beside James' bed, watching her son and crying, her hand rested lightly on his. Neither he nor Lily had woken up yet and Rachel didn't know how much longer she could stand watching him, comatose--it was strange enough for her to be looking at him with no glasses on his face, and no smile on his lips.

When his hand started twitching under hers, she nearly jumped out of her skin.

"Lily," James croaked, before he could even manage to open his eyes. "Is Lily okay? And Harry?"

"James, oh _God_ ," Rachel breathed. "They're okay, sweetheart, sssh, don't move now, you're only going to hurt yourself."

"Where are they? Mum?" James asked, finally managing to get his eyes open. He blinked and looked around blindly, unable to make sense of anything. He struggled a little, trying to sit up. "Where... Lily..."

He spotted her red hair across the room and he gritted his teeth, trying to get out of bed and go to her.

"James, stop," Rachel said firmly, standing up and trying to hold him back. "Sweetheart, you're just going to make things worse for yourself. She's there and she's going to be fine, now please don't hurt yourself anymore."

James relaxed a little but didn't lay back down. His head was throbbing, alone with most of the rest of him, but he grabbed his mother's shoulder and ignored the pain for just one more minute. "Mum, it was a black SUV. It ran us off the road, I tried... I couldn't... They're okay? They're going to be okay, you promise?"

"I know, JP, I know," Rachel said soothingly. "You have to calm down, sweetheart. You did all that you could. Harry's with your father, and he's fine, he just had to get stitches on his forehead. The doctors think he might have a scar, but that's certainly not a horrible thing." Rachel swallowed. "And Lily has some broken bones, the same as you, just..." Oh she really didn't want to be the one to tell him this.

"She lost the baby, JP," Rachel breathed. "I'm so sorry."

James squeezed his eyes shut and then finally fell back against the bed. He shook his head and clenched his hands into fists, but it didn't help. He could still feel it, and it was worse than all the other physical pain combined.

"Mum," he managed to get out, and then the tears came. He knew that as long as Lily was okay, life would go on. They could fix anything else, as long as he still had Lily and Harry. But he couldn't help but mourn for the other child he'd almost had.

"I know, I know," Rachel said, and leaned forward, hugging him lightly so as not to disturb any of the bandages. "They did get to her in time to prevent any permanent damage though, JP. So Lily can... she can still have children."

James nodded, but he couldn't find anything to say. Everything would be okay eventually, but it wasn't right now.

After a few moments, James managed to pull himself together enough to ask, "I need to talk to Sirius, Mum. I... you wouldn't be very proud of me. We got in this big row on Halloween and I blamed it all on him. I don't want him to think I ever believed that. I know he wouldn't... Just, can you make him come here? Somehow? He probably won't want to talk to me, but..."

Rachel swallowed hard. "James, Sirius is in prison. He's being charged in having something to do with your accident."

"He... but he didn't. You know he'd never! Besides, he drives a motorbike," James said. "How could he run anyone off the road on a motorbike?"

"I know that, but he nearly punched Peter Pettigrew's face in, James, and Peter is saying that Sirius essentially admitted to killing you," Rachel said with a sigh. "It makes no sense to me."

"Shit," James swore. "Can you bring me some paper then? I need to write him a letter. And I need to apologize to Remus, too. And get more painkillers, shit, could you call a nurse or something? It feels like my head is going to explode."

***

Sirius figured that he was either doomed to rip out all his hair, cry all of the water out of his body, or fracture his knuckles punching the brick wall of the cell he was being held in. They'd sent a lawyer for him, who said that with Peter's bullshit testimony on top of everything else there was a lot of fucking evidence built up against him, and Sirius was just at a complete loss. He'd told the lawyer, Paul, that Peter was the spy and gave his reasoning, particularly the bit about the suspicious London related activity and the job none of them knew anything about--Paul had definitely perked up interest at that and told Sirius he was going to do his best to dig up as much on Peter Pettigrew and possible ties to Vol de Mort that he could.

The next day he'd come back with an anonymously signed letter in hand with handwriting that was familiar to Sirius (but he just couldn't place) telling Paul that Sirius had nothing to do with them and agreeing with everything Sirius had said about Peter, and gave him a few numbers to call and people to talk to. It seemed good, but who knew what Peter--or Riddle--was capable of lying about him.

The worst of it, he thought, was being stuck in such a small confining place and having no fucking idea what was going on. No one had come to see him, even though he'd been told that--thank fucking _Jesus_ \--they were all still alive and they were going to recover. And while that was wonderful and amazing and an absolute miracle considering what had happened to everyone, Sirius was still punching solid surfaces and kicking the shit out of his bedding, and screaming whenever he felt the need. Which was often.

"Black!" came the voice of the usual officer on guard, whose name Sirius didn't care to remember. "Stop sobbing you great ruddy fairy, you've got mail."

"Mail?" Sirius questioned, wiping his eyes with the sleeve of his shirt. He stood from where he'd been wallowing in the corner and walked over to the bars. The officer handed him an envelope with 'Sirius' written on it in James' handwriting, and Sirius nearly started bawling again before he'd even had the chance to open it.

Once the guard had left and Sirius could curl back up in the corner and read what he was certain was a biting admonishment and 'I told you so!' all rolled into one, Sirius opened the envelope and pulled out the letter, wiping his eyes again before starting to read it. "Padfoot," he read out loud. "I know it wasn't you. I never thought it was. I'm sorry. I love you, brother. Prongs." Sirius sniffed and smiled with relief. "PS," he continued. "I know you're probably freaking out, but don't. You'll be out of there in no time. I promise. You can count on me."

Sirius broke down again but with tears of happiness and he let out a whoop that was out of place but that sounded wonderful echoing around the room. James believed him and that was important because surely James had figured out that it was Peter and he would make it right and Sirius could have his life back. He just... he wanted Remus to come so badly and it was killing him, but he still smiled, because he knew that any doubts that Remus might have, James could reassure.

***

Dorcas was laying very, very still. She was afraid to move. Without even putting her hand to her stomach or opening her eyes to look, she could feel she wasn't pregnant anymore. It wasn't about anything physical, because she felt as high as a kite and she was sure they'd put her on morphine. It was something bigger than that. It felt like a piece of her was just gone, or like after a really long, really good hug when you let go and your body feels cold even if it's warm out.

And after that thought hit her, Dorcas began to panic.

Still too scared to open her eyes, just in case she was dead, she just assumed Edgar would be there, somewhere near enough to hear her speak. The possibility of him not being okay didn't even occur to her.

Thanks to lack of use and a very dry throat, Dorcas just coughed at her first attempt to speak. At her second try, she managed, though she sounded strangled and croaky. "Bonesie, where's the baby?"

"Dor?" Edgar asked, startled from where he'd been dozing in the chair beside her bed. He'd been waiting for her to wake up and hadn't slept much, and it was finally starting to catch up with him. Shaking his head to make his senses work again he turned and blinked and wondered if maybe he'd just hallucinated her speaking to him. When he reached over and she held his hand that was answer enough and he said, "The baby's fine. They're just watching her because they were a little worried about the oxygen deprivation but they were supposed to bring her up this afternoon."

"What happened?" Dorcas whispered, clinging tightly to his hand, eyes still squeezed shut, though the tangible, pressing terror in her chest had lifted. Edgar was okay, and the baby was okay. "I want her. Can you get her for me now? Ed, I need to see her."

"The doctor's office called Ma when we didn't show up and she went looking for us. Susan spotted one of your shoes on Mercy Bridge and they got to us just in time apparently. I came around pretty quick, and they took you into surgery to get Michele out," Edgar explained. "There's some other stuff, with everyone else, too, but, um. That can wait. I'll go ask the nurse, okay?"

"No!" Dorcas replied, clinging more tightly to his hand. "Don't leave me by myself. We just about died, Ed. We... they... She's okay though? Our daughter is okay?"

"Yes, she's fine," Edgar said. "Very loud. And she seems really small, although they keep telling me it's pretty normal, and she's light all over. Skin, hair, everything. And here," he added, reaching across her for the nurses buzzer. "We can bring the nurse to us."

"What did they do? Did they... I mean, they cut her out of me, didn't they?" Dorcas asked, mind flashing back to right before they'd been knocked out and the threat that had been delivered as the guy had held a knife to her gut. "I wasn't even... I don't even get to remember... They fucked up my proposal and they fucked up the birth of my daughter. I hope they all rot in fucking jail."

"A C-section, yeah," Edgar said. "And I was being treated when they did it, so I missed it to." Edgar purposefully neglected to mention that Sirius had been arrested and that everyone else was in hospital too, figuring that right now, Michele was enough for her to handle. The nurse popped her head in the door then, and smiled when she saw that Dorcas was awake.

Without Edgar even having to ask, she said, "I think I can get her up here an hour early," before bustling off again.

"You parents called a couple of times," Edgar said once the nurse had left. "They haven't come down though, but I think they've been waiting for you to wake up."

"I don't care about them," Dorcas replied. "How long is it going to take them to get Rocket? I want to meet my daughter."

"Not very long, I don't think," Edgar said before reaching into his pocket and pulling out the ring box with Dorcas' engagement ring in it. "I thought you might actually like to have this now," he said. "I'm getting tired of correcting people."

Dorcas smiled and craned her neck to kiss him. The ring was just as pretty as she remembered. It wasn't anything big. They didn't have money for anything big. But it was all hers, and everything it meant made it the most amazing, beautiful thing in the world to her. "Re-propose to me, Bonesie? I want to be able to fucking enjoy it, you know?"

"Well I can't remember exactly what I said," Edgar said, leaning in close so that he was nose to nose with her and smiling. "But I love you more than anything, Princess. I don't know what I'd do without you and I'm glad I don't have to find out." He kissed her sweetly. "Be my wife?"

"I would love to," Dorcas said, then returned the kiss enthusiastically before holding her hand out to him. "Put it on for me."

Edgar obliged, sliding the ring onto her finger with a smile.

The door opened then and the nurse that had entered earlier came in, holding a small, pink bundle in her arms. Another nurse had held the door for her, and smiled at Edgar and Dorcas as the first nurse said, "They'll bring the crib up in the moment, but in the meantime I think someone wants to meet her mummy."

"Oh, my baby," Dorcas breathed, taking the little girl into his arms, eyes wide with wonder, awe, and a little fear. She looked over at Edgar for a moment, smiling like she'd just been handed the entire world in a pink blanket. "Oh, sweetie. Oh, my little girl. Bonesie, look. Look at her. We're a family now."

Edgar smiled widely, sitting on the edge of the bed and wrapping an arm around Dorcas' shoulders. The nurse left the room to give them their privacy, and Edgar moved the pink blankets around Michele's face aside so that Dorcas could get a better look at her. "You're lucky she's asleep," Edgar said. "The nurses tell me she's a real horror when she's awake."

"That's my girl," Dorcas said with a laugh. "Oh, Rocket, you're mommy and daddy's little superstar, aren't you? Ed, just look. Look at her. We made her! We fucking _made_ her out of a couple orgasms and fucking biology!"

"Yeah it's a little intimidating, isn't it?" Edgar said. He'd cried over her when he'd held her first. He'd been so close to losing Michele and Dorcas all in one go of it, and if they'd died he never would've forgiven himself. "Dor, I. I'm sorry for sort of pushing that appointment on you. If we'd have stayed home it wouldn't have happened."

"Fuck off, Bonesie. Don't do the irrational guilt thing with me. I'm busy admiring my daughter," Dorcas replied absently, smile widening impossibly more as Michele made a snuffling noise and made a face. Dorcas loosened the blanket a little more and let her stick her little arms out as she woke up. "She's so small. She looks breakable. Do you think I can do it, Ed? Do you think I'll be a good mommy? I know you'll be a good daddy."

"I think you'll be a great mommy," Edgar said. "It's a funny thing you know," he added, watching as Michele blinked up at them with little concern and then made a yawning noise. "The nurses say she screams herself hoarse when she's awake and they try to soothe her. But when I held her first she didn't make a sound and now you're holding her and she's awake and she seems pretty content. Do you think she knows us?"

"Of course she knows us," Dorcas said. "It's like... if you and I had never met her, and they'd put us in a room full of newborn girls, you just try and tell me wouldn't know which one she was. Just because she can't tell us all about it doesn't mean she doesn't feel that connection too. She's a part of us. She's ours."

"She is," Edgar agreed. "And we should be able to take her home really soon. The, uh. The police are going to want to talk to you. It wasn't just us and James and Lily on Halloween... it was _everybody_."

"Everybody?" Dorcas asked, and then blinked. "Everyone's okay though, right? The idiots botched their attempts up too? You would've told me right away if someone was... Ed! I can't believe you didn't tell me this right away. Spit it the fuck out, Bonesie. What happened?"

"Well they tried to kill everybody and now the cops are spinning some crackpot idea that Sirius is the spy, pretty much," Edgar said. "Tripe. Pettigrew, mark my words. Sirius beat the shit out of him and I'll bet all the money I've got in the bank that that's who Sirius was talking to in James' driveway. Makes sense, really. I don't know how we didn't see it before."

"Enough of Michele's life has already been spent with crap talk about the spy this and death and destruction that. Well fuck it. We'll deal with it later. Look, she's waking up more and I want her to get to know us, since neither of us got to hold her first when she was delivered," Dorcas said, having decided they could talk about that shit later. Right now, she just wanted to focus on her family. "Rocket, baby, I'm Dorcas. I'm your mum. I'm pretty young still, but don't you worry. I'm completely fucking extraordinary. I'll be the coolest mom around, just you wait. Now you go, Bonesie. Introduce yourself."

Edgar laughed, peering down at his daughter and smiling. "Hi _Chele_ ," he said suddenly, remembering Sirius' suggestion of a nickname. "I'm your daddy, Edgar. Just look at you, baby, you're just a few days old and you've already got me wrapped around you little fingers. I think I'm done for. What d'you say, mummy?"

"I think we're both done for. I would do anything for her," Dorcas said. "This is scary. There are now two people more important to me than me."

"Yeah," Edgar said with a wide smile, watching as Michele screwed up her face. "Uh oh," he said, screwing up his face. "I think we're about to experience the less than pleasant aspect of parenthood."

Dorcas lifted Michele and tilted her, laughing as the little thing upchucked all over Edgar. "Tag, you're it. Time to be a daddy. I'm still on bed rest."

***

Shifting slightly in his chair, Gideon rested his head in his hand and took a deep breath in through his nostrils. He was so unbelievably thankful that she was alive, and that he was alive, and that they had another chance. That they were _both_ alive instead of one or the other having to deal with losing each other so early in life. Gideon had been watching Marlene sleep for the last 45 minutes, having--with the help of Molly and his nephews--snuck out of the hospital in Salcombe and driven all the way to Liverpool. Molly and Arthur had brought the van over, and put a change of clothes in it for him so he didn't look like a complete nutter running around in a hospital gown.

Marlene stirred, and then sighed. She'd only been awake for a day, and she was already sick of the hospital. There was hardly any reason to open her eyes. She was only waiting to get discharged so she could go back to Gideon. She was so worried.

She opened a her eyes then gasped when she realized someone was in the room. When she figured out it was Gideon, she shrieked happily and held out her arms. "Gideon! What are you... 

Gideon grinned widely and got up, hugging her tightly and kissing her like he'd never kissed her before. "Fay and I staged a psych ward break," he said and smiled against her mouth. "Holy shit I've missed you."

Marlene wrapped her arms around him so tight it was painful, though that was familiar by now, what with the burns all over her legs and abdomen, and just kissed him again. "I was so worried. I got to your place in time to see them all leaving, and then they just stuck me in a van... It's so good to see you alive and well, Gid."

"It's a mutual sort of thing," Gideon said, climbing onto the bed and lying down next to her somewhat uncomfortably in the small space--it didn't matter. He wanted to be as close to her as possible. "I love you. So much."

"Careful," Marlene winced, shifting away from him just a little. She hated to, since she wanted to be close to him, but it hurt. "I love you too, but um. Just be careful, okay?"

"Are the burns very bad?" Gideon asked, concerned.

"Just on my legs and a bit around my middle. Don't worry, my arse is still fine. Tattoo intact," Marlene said, trying to make light. "Besides, the scarring probably be too bad. I only needed, like, one tiny little skin graft."

Leaning his head in, Gideon kissed her shoulder through her hospital gown. "So what exactly happened? They were kind of vague about it, what with me being suicidal and all."

"Well, I was knocked out with chloroform I guess. I woke up in a van and they said something about Stubby. Then they knocked me out again, but not before I kicked one of them in the face. When I came to after that, I was in a car with Stubby and he was trying to kick out a window. There was a bomb counting down, Gid, and he said the most... I didn't want to leave him, you know, but he was handcuffed to the steering wheel and I couldn't... I tried, but..." Marlene stopped then and swallowed around the lump in her throat. "I wasn't quite out the window when it went off. It blew me a few feet away, and then I woke up here."

Gideon took a deep breath. "I guess we were right about him being a good guy deep down," he said. "I feel like I owe him a lot."

Marlene's eyes were brimming and she hid her face in Gideon's neck, taking a deep breath. God, he smelled good. "I'm going to miss him. Not how he was at the end, but our Stubby. Anyway. I heard they found Caradoc. That's fantastic. Fabian must be over the moon."

"Yeah, and he's fine, just some rope burns and serious dehydration," Gideon said. "We've been getting all of our news from Molly because the doctor's won't tell us dick all. I mean, what else have you been told?"

"Nothing, really. Just that no one else but Stubby had died. And I had to talk to the police for _years_ ," Marlene said. "As soon as I'm well, they want me to come identify people. I guess they're starting arrests."

"They arrested Sirius," Gideon said quietly.

"They think he's the spy then?" Marlene asked. "I must say, I don't know what to think. He can be an idiot, but I don't think he has it in him to hurt James. Or any of us, really. But then, I guess spies are always people that everyone trusts."

"Here's the kicker though," Gideon said. "They arrested him after he beat the shit out of Peter."

"Peter," Marlene deadpanned, and then pulled away from Gid just enough to look up into his eyes. "Wow. It's been ages since I've even thought about him. Do you think it's Peter then? I'd buy that before I bought Sirius. Besides, it's got to blow being that invisible, right? Think it blows enough to be a motive, or am I just looking for an excuse because I know Sirius better?"

"I think it's Peter. I think we all just forgot that he was there," Gideon commented sadly. "It makes more sense than Sirius, at least. I don't know. But I'm sure we'll find out."

"Gideon, do you think we could get away with making love before any of the doctors show up?" Marlene asked suddenly, trailing a finger down Gideon's neck and continuing over his chest. "Just, I think the fact that we're both alive and well might be worth a celebratory shag, you know? And if you're really gentle, it won't disturb my burns."

Gideon laughed. "I think we'd get caught and then I'd get kicked out for not having any good judgement left," he said. "Escaping from one hospital to shag my wife in another might be frowned upon a little more than just escaping from the hospital just to see you."

"Too bad," Marlene said with a smile, though she was perfectly content to just lay there with him. "You escaped from the psych ward and drove all the way here to see me before you'd even been officially discharged from the hospital. Such dedication. God, I love you. Even if you are a big crazy freak sometimes. ...And even if you won't have public sex with me in my hospital bed."

"We'll wait until you're ready," Gideon said practically. "And I know what you're thinking, Kinny, and I'm not going to go running when I see what the scars look like. I love you just how you are, and _scars_ are not going to stop me from shagging you rotten."

Marlene smiled. "I know that, you silly man. Besides, they're going to make me totally hardcore. You'll have the toughest wife out there. I survived a _car bomb_ , baby."

***

Emmeline was waiting for Leroy to get back from the press conference the band had to do regarding Stubby's death, and she passed the time by doodling in the spiral notebook the doctors had given her so she could interact with everyone. Apparently all the fumes she'd inhaled had chemically burned her lungs and oesophagus and so she had this rather interesting plastic apparatus with all sorts of tubes over her nose and mouth so she was inhaling medicine that would fix all the damage done. Even if it had been off, however, it was recommended that she didn't try to speak until after she'd had a little time to heal.

All the medication she was inhaling made her quite dizzy and a little loopy, and she was pretty sure she was also on quite a few painkillers because she almost felt high. As a result, she had to be escorted any time she wanted out of bed because she had a tendency to fall over, and she wrote out a lot of... total bollocks. She was keeping the notebook for posterity's sake, of course. She was sure it'd give her laughs for many years to come.

Despite all of that, Emmeline knew she'd been lucky. Those chemicals could very easily have killed her.

She looked up as the door opened and smiled as soon as she saw it was Leroy, and she quickly jotted down, _Well hello, you. How'd it go_?

Leroy smiled at her sadly. "Hi," he said. "It was... tiring. They asked a lot of questions we couldn't really answer. How're you feeling?"

 _Still a little barmy_ , Emmeline wrote. Then, after pausing thoughtfully, added, _And light headed. When the nurse comes, ask her to lower the pain meds_? She held it up for him to see, and as he read, she tacked on underneath, _You okay_?

"Yeah, I'll ask her," Leroy agreed. "I'm all right. It's just been... you know. Really overwhelming. They wouldn't let Stubby's mum identify the body because they were afraid it would traumatize her. Apparently the burns are so bad he's barely distinguishable from a piece of driftwood." Leroy shuddered.

Emmeline gestured for him to come sit on the bed so she could touch him, since it was so much easier at the moment to express feelings with touch than with words. She reached up and brushed a hand through his hair gently as soon as he was close enough. Even though he and Stubby hadn't been getting on so well lately, she knew Leroy was still really broken up about it. And understandably so. Stubby and Leroy had spent the vast majority of their time together ever since they were really young children. She couldn't imagine what he was going through.

After a moment of silence, Em picked up her pen again and wrote, _Have you seen Marlene? Are her burns bad_?

"Uh, yeah, I went to see her," Leroy said. "And she didn't show me or anything, but they don't sound very nice. She looks like she's in a lot of pain."

 _I'm glad Gideon came. Fabian has Caradoc back too. Things overall are looking up. If only Stubby had made it, then it wouldn't be so bittersweet_ , Em wrote, sighing a little. It was hard to appreciate the rest of it when they were mourning the loss of a friend.

"If could've been a lot worse," Leroy said. "Losing one person versus losing _everyone_... I mean, it's not easy, but if all of you had died I think I would've had a mental breakdown."

 _I'm still here. And I love you_ , Em scribbled, wishing she didn't have that thing attached to her face so she could kiss him. Instead, she just added, _What was asked/said at the PC_?

"I love you too, Em," Leroy said quietly. "Well they haven't released the details of what's happened so the reporters were hounding us. And they asked what's going to happen to the band, and what's going to happen to the money, and shit like that." With a sardonic little laugh he added, "One asked me who I would've rather lost, you or Stubby. Who asks things like that?"

Emmeline shook her head in disgust. Some people just didn't have any tact.

The door opened again then, and Ben popped his head in. "We're not interrupting, are we? Dale and me just thought we'd pop in and visit. See how fast we can get you writing. All that. Can we come in?"

Em nodded, and the two boys stepped inside, Ben jumping onto a chair and then dropping from a crouch to sit cross-legged. He was wearing skinny jeans, and he had drumsticks sticking out of one of his socks. He pulled them out and began idly drumming out a slow rhythm on the sole of his converse. "I forget how terrible some reporters can be. I wanted to hit that one guy."

"Yeah, and they send the assholes out whenever anything even semi-touchy is involved," Leroy said.

"They were still hounding us when we were coming into the hospital," Dale commented, leaning on the bed and running a hand through his hair.

"Security stopped them in the lobby. Good thing, too, or I really _would_ have punched the assholes," Ben said, then focussed on Em. "Hey, did you know you have your own personal security guards? I guess people know that where you are, the band is, and there have totally been attempted break-ins by fans. How weird is that? Oh, there's a bunch more mail at the fan club what's addressed to you. Apparently almost dying makes the girls who hated you for being Leroy's girl love you for... not dying. People are so weird."

Emmeline, who'd been writing a response to the topic of reporters and security (she'd gotten as far as _Don't rise. They're just trying to bait you into snapping so_...) but then had stopped and attempted a reply to the security guards question (that time only managing _Yeah, they came in yester_...) before just giving up and writing _SLOW DOWN_!

Leroy laughed. "That reminds me, Em, your father is at a complete loss. He started sending thank you cards back to the fans who'd sent you gifts and now there's so many he's forgotten who he's replied to."

 _I'll post a thank you on your website_ , Em wrote. _Tell him not to worry_.

"Smart girl," Ben said. Then, after clearing his throat awkwardly, asked, "So, uh. I spoke to the Boardmans. They called just after the whole do with the press. The funeral is going to be next Thursday in Salcombe. I hope you're released by then, Em."

"That's going to be the most surreal thing," Dale said thoughtfully. "I know he was the world's biggest dick the last little while, but Christ what are we going to do without him?"

Leroy shook his head. "The Gordons are Stubby's. I certainly don't feel right about keeping it going."

 _You don't have to decide everything right now. Give it time to settle_ , Emmeline wrote, though she didn't mean it like she was suggesting they continue without Stubby. Leroy was right. The Hobbled Gordons was Stubby's dream, and it wouldn't quite be right to go on without him. But at the same time, it felt unfinished. She hoped that with time, a solution would appear.

"Crouch suggested we have Marlene take over for Stubby," Ben snorted. "I guess he's never heard her sing. He just figures it'd be the best way to maximize the capitalizing capabilities of the whole fucked up situation. But Emmeline is right. We shouldn't even think about it now. We should just let the rubble settle for a while before we go disturbing it again."

"Marlene sounds like a cat stuck on spin cycle," Dale said absently. "And Crouch didn't seem too miffed that Stubby was dead anyhow."

"That's because what little emotion he has is expressed through his trousers," Leroy laughed.

 _His son works for VDM_ , Emmeline wrote, frowning. _Or his name was on a list we got from a contact inside, anyway_.

"Really?" Leroy asked, surprised. "Well that's not going to sit well with his father, Christ. Think he could've had something to do with what happened?"

 _No way to know yet_ , Em said. There was still a lot that had to be done, and though the police had started arrests, no one had really been told anything, and Emmeline knew they probably wouldn't tell her or any of the others much until it went to trial. Then there'd be details galore for everyone as they tried to sort it all out. At least once they all got discharged, they could start identifying people. Then at least they'd know who was being arrested and for what. Curiously, Em wrote _Has Dad called my lawyer yet? Or does The Ministry still want me to get a 'better' one_? and held the book out to Leroy. She didn't mind if the others read it, but they wouldn't know the answer.

"You're father told them to fuck off, essentially," Leroy said. "Said there's nothing wrong with Mr. Stedman and they can just stuff it up their arses."

 _Good_ , Emmeline wrote, with an air of finality.

"It's not like you're on trial. You're just going to be going on the witness stand and stuff, right? That'll be cool," Ben commented.

Emmeline's nurse breezed into the room then, and said, unsurprisingly, "Good afternoon, my dear. How are you feeling today?"

"She asked me to ask you to turn down the painkillers," Leroy said. "She's been feeling light-headed."

"Has she?" the nurse asked, and looked at Emmeline. Em nodded in response. "Well, that's probably because she hasn't been getting enough rest then. Why don't you lot shoo and let her sleep for a few hours? I'm surprised she's awake now, to be honest. All the excitement of press and fans trying to break in, and visitors coming and going at all hours... must be exhausting."

Emmeline was feeling a little tired, so she didn't argue. Instead, she just turned to a new page and wrote, _Can I kiss him goodbye_?

The nurse smiled and unclipped the strap holding the mask on. "Deep breath," she instructed, waiting for Emmeline to inhale before removing the mask from her face.

Em smiled, scratched her nose, and then turned her book over to show Leroy what she'd asked the nurse.

Leroy smiled widely, and leaned in, giving Em a soft, gentle kiss. "I love you, babe."

As the nurse reattached the mask to Emmeline's face, she wrote, _Love you too. Bye for now_. And then, in bigger writing, _Bye guys_!

"You guys are so fucking cute it makes me want to scratch you behind the ears ears. It isn't very rock and roll, Roy," Ben teased, rolling his eyes as he unfolded himself and got to his feet, stretching his arms way above his head, the drumsticks still in his hands grazing the ceiling. He shoved them into a pocket and made a peace sign before heading for the door.

"Later, Em," Dale offered with a smile, waiting at the door with Ben for Leroy, who waved and smiled at Em before joining them. He didn't think he'd ever stop being so thankful and amazed that she was still alive.

"They're nice boys, aren't they," the nurse said as the three left the room, shutting the door behind them. Emmeline nodded in reply, and the nurse once again detached the mask from her face. "All right. Let's take a look at that throat of yours. If the swelling has gone down at all, you might even get to eat food for dinner!"

***

Sirius tapped his cuffed hands nervously on the table, his foot keeping time, and his stomach doing petrified flip flops--it hadn't stopped swirling and bobbing since they'd told him that Remus was there to see him. Sirius didn't know what to expect, and while a very certain part of him was telling him not to be an idiot (Remus was his _husband_ and surely he didn't think Sirius had done what they were saying he'd done), but another frightened part of him, a part that had been very prominent in the face of the astounding horrible things that had happened, was expecting the door to open and Remus to punch him in the face.

The taps increased in speed, and Sirius blew hair out of his eyes.

Remus was practically vibrating. They were taking _so long_ to get him to Sirius. Once they reached the door and the man began fiddling with is key ring (there had to be a dozen, and he must have looked at everyone one before he found the one that unlocked the door), Remus just wanted to shove him out of the way and run in. He didn't, of course, but the second the door opened and the man stepped out of his way, Remus stalked into the room and right to Sirius, feeling something he couldn't quite describe. Even just seeing Sirius made everything feel like it was easier to handle, not as overwhelming, not as scary. He wasn't quite happy, as there were too many horrible things going on to be happy, exactly, but he was relieved and... lightened by Sirius' presence.

He didn't even wait for the door to close behind him before he pulled Sirius to his feet and into a hard kiss. His arms pulled Sirius tight against him, despite the awkward position of Sirius' hands cuffed in front of him.

Breaking the kiss and moving to place a hand on either side of Sirius' face, Remus said, "You idiot, getting yourself arrested and leaving me alone. I could kill you. Are you okay?"

"I. You?" Sirius furrowed his eyebrows in surprise at Remus' actions, and licked his lips. "I've been better."

"Lily's not woken up yet, but after she does, I'll see if she can get in contact with whoever gave her that list of names so we can prove it was Peter and get you out of here. I think it might've been Severus who gave her the list. We've been chatting a bit, and I know he kept in touch with her, and that, until recently, he worked for Vol de Mort," Remus said quickly. "James is about ready to kill Peter, by the way. And I think the police are holding him anyway, even though he's not technically been arrested yet. A lot of the rubbish he's saying just doesn't make sense, and with James and I both pointing out his discrepancies, I don't think they can hold you much longer. I... sorry. I'm rambling. It's... god, it's good to see you. Everything is so... messy. I wish you weren't stuck down here."

Sirius smiled slightly. "You believe me? I was afraid that. Well, it doesn't really matter, now does it? The little shit was throwing up at the end of James' driveway right after they left," Sirius said quickly. "When I went over to try and talk to James, and I let him get away before I figured it out. I was so _stupid_ , Remus. How did I not put it together before?"

"Of course I believe you, you idiot. Everyone with _brains_ believes you. And you can't blame yourself. It's just going to get you in trouble, and anyway, none of us figured it out. No one thought he'd..." Remus trailed off. "Well, it doesn't matter. He can only lie for so long. The truth will come out. It always does. Let's not... can we not talk about him? It just makes me so mad, and as I doubt they'll give us much time together, I'd rather not spend it being angry. They won't let anyone else in to see you, did you know? Regulus was here, but they sent him home, and Rachel tried to see you earlier, but they wouldn't let her."

"Really?" Sirius asked, surprised. "They don't tell me anything. They barely let my lawyer talk to me for Christ's sake. How is everyone? I mean, everyone's recovering and everything right?"

Remus took a deep breath. There was a lot to tell, if he didn't know anything. "Harry's okay. He has a bunch of stitches in his forehead, but other than that, he's okay. The baby didn't make it, but Lily's stable. James, as mentioned, is awake. Edgar and Dorcas were knocked out and pushed into that river by Ed's, but they found them only a couple minutes after going in, and they're okay. They did an emergency cesarian, and the baby is fine as well. Gideon and Fabian were in the psychiatric ward because they'd been made to take pills and it looked like suicide, and they caused a stir by breaking out. Fabian went to see Caradoc, who they found and he's here in the hospital recovering, and Gideon drove four hours straight to get to Liverpool to see Marlene. Apparently she'd been kidnapped and put in a car with Stubby and a bomb. Marlene's going to be okay, but her legs got quite burned. Ah, Stubby didn't make it. And Emmeline was made to inhale dangerous chemicals. They found her in time though. So. Stubby's the only one."

"Holy fuck," Sirius said after letting out a low whistle. "Riddle's going to fry, isn't he? I mean, he doesn't stand a chance."

"He'd better. Though I don't think he was directly involved in any of the attempts," Remus said. "I'm sure they won't be able to get him off completely, though, whatever happens."

"God, I've missed you," Sirius said suddenly, resting his head on Remus' shoulder.

Remus shifted his arms, curling them around Sirius' shoulders once more, though this time not hanging on quite so fiercely. "I've missed you too. So much that I nearly got myself arrested trying to get in to see you."

"Really?" Sirius asked. "Why? I mean, I'm not _that_ important of an inmate, am I?"

"Of course you are," Remus said, and then smiled a little sheepishly. "And it isn't quite that dramatic. I refused to answer any of their questions until they agreed to let me see you, and they half-heartedly pointed out they could bring me in for obstruction of justice. It was obviously an empty threat, though. I didn't stage a protest or anything. Though I may have been forced to in the event that they'd still refused."

"Very nice, Moony," Sirius grinned. "Jesus the last few days have just been so surreal and ridiculous. I just want to be out of here and done with this."

"What, you don't want to hang around long enough for a conjugal visit?" Remus teased, smirking a little as he spoke, trailing his hands down from Sirius' shoulders to his hips. He was only teasing, of course, but now that the thought had come to mind, Remus couldn't help but wish Sirius was free for reasons _other_ than moral support.

Sirius let out a bark of laughter. "You wouldn't be allowed in to see me again if the officer came back and found you doing what you're thinking about right now."

"How much longer can they really keep you in here, anyway," Remus mused, just enjoying the smile on Sirius' face and attempting to earn another laugh. "It might be worth it. Besides. They know we're married. It shouldn't be shocking, really..."

"You've got my attention," Sirius breathed as Remus pulled their hips together, knowing perfectly well that his husband was full of shit.

Remus blinked and gave Sirius a half sheepish and half shocked look and put a little space between them. Not much, but enough at least that nothing indecent might unintentionally pop up. "I'm only joking. Look, there's a camera in the corner. You should know I'd never do it anywhere with a camera."

"Yeah, I caught that," Sirius said with a wry smirk. "You forget that I know you better than anyone, you prat."

Remus smiled and chuckled softly. "I don't function properly without you, you know. Perhaps I should refuse to answer any more questions until they let you out. Though that might work better if I hadn't already answered all of their questions or, consequently, if I actually had anything useful to say."

"What sort of questions did they ask?" Sirius questioned. "Ones about me?"

"Yes. And about the Order, and all the threats and attacks and whatnot, and about Riddle and Vol de Mort and it was very long and very tedious," Remus said with a sigh. "They're finally taking us seriously, at least. All it took was attempted mass-murder. They asked some about Peter, too."

"I can't believe that little twat has the gall to try and turn it all around and blame it on me," Sirius said angrily. "He's got a lot of fucking nerve."

"I know. Just..." Remus started, but the door opened and a man interrupted by clearing his throat.

"Uh, time to go, Mr. Lupin."

Remus sighed, and then kissed Sirius. He was about to pull away when the officer cleared his throat again, so instead Remus deepened the kiss, leaning into Sirius.

Sirius laughed against Remus' lips. "I love you," he murmured.

"I love you too," Remus replied softly, and reluctantly pulled away from Sirius. It had felt so good to be close to him again after being away from him for practically three whole days. "I'll be back soon, if they let me. And you'll be out in no time, I'm sure. In the meantime, just... don't drop the soap."

Sirius laughed. "I won't, promise. And I'll see you soon."

Remus smiled as he made his way from the room. It felt good to hear Sirius laugh. It made Remus feel like things were going to be okay.

"Soon," Remus agreed, the word punctuated by the sound of the door latching shut between them.


	37. Love & Peace, Or Else (November 4th, 2007)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Where there are demands, inevitabilties, and something promising.

"Would you like some more wine, Lucy?" Narcissa asked politely.

They'd been on tenterhooks for days about the whole Riddle mess, but they didn't know what would happen to Lucius. He hadn't exactly been on a legitimate payroll, but still, neither Narcissa nor Lucius himself knew to what degree his involvement could be traced.

"I wine!" Draco said brightly and reached for Narcissa's glass. It was well out of his reach, though, and Narcissa just smiled at him.

Earlier that day, Riddle had appeared fleetingly on the news as he fled the paparazzi. Despite all the allegations, and though he'd been brought in for questioning, he'd not yet been arrested and no charges had been filed against him. It made Narcissa sick, considering what had happened. He should be arrested. It was obvious he'd organized it all, and he couldn't believe they were trying to play it off like he had no involvement.

At the very least, though, it gave Narcissa hope that perhaps Lucius could get off as well.

"No wine for my little boy. You have good taste, but you're too young, baby," Narcissa said and leaned over to kiss Draco on the forehead.

"No, thank you," Lucius said, pushing his food back and forth on his plate idly and glancing around. He was on edge. He was getting paranoid. He expected the bobbies to beat the door in at any second and drag him to jail. Riddle might've been capable of evading arrest (if not very intense speculation), but Lucius was very certain that everything was bound to come around and kick them all in the collective arse. Narcissa's friends had taken the brunt of the lunatics deranged mind, and his minions--like Lucius--were doomed to take the fall for it all.

And, despite it all, the situation itself was unbelievably surreal. Attempted murder on his former students--his and Narcissa's _friends_? A ridiculous attempt to frame Sirius for everything? What in the name of _God_ had that psychopath been thinking when he'd given out orders that day?

Then again, Lucius supposed that _not thinking_ had been much of the problem.

Before Narcissa could say anything else, the flash of lights from the driveway caught her attention, just the sort of quick, bright flickers Narcissa immediately knew to come from a police car. She set down her cutlery and looked over at Lucius.

"Kiss Draco goodnight. He'll be asleep by the time you get back, because you _know_ it's going to take ages," Narcissa said, shoulders set determinedly, as though by sheer force of will she could influence Lucius' fate and have him back later that night.

Lucius took a deep, pained breath before standing up and walking over to Draco, planting a soft kiss on the crown of his blond head.

"Dadda?" Draco asked, as though sensing the sudden wave of tension that had overtaken the room.

Lucius considered saying good-byes and dropping regretful apologies, but there was no use in being sorry for something neither he or Narcissa could've prevented. All the same he ran a hand over Draco's silky hair, trying to smile reassuringly before moving over to Narcissa just as the knock came at the door. Leaning down and kissing her deeply, hands cupping her face, the knocks became louder and quicker and a voice called, "Mr. Malfoy, this is the police. We have some questions for you. Please open the door."

Narcissa returned the kiss, curling a dainty hand up around Lucius' neck. She broke away after a moment and rested her forehead against Lucius', eyes closed, then said fiercely, "I'll fix it. I promise. I'll do whatever it takes."

" _Cissa_ ," Lucius said warningly, voice quiet. "Don't do anything stupid."

The knocks came again, and Narcissa tilted her head to the side and shouted, "Don't dent my door, it's custom made. It isn't even locked. If you can't wait for us to let you in, then open it yourselves. Such impatience, honestly."

The door opened as Lucius walked out of the room and toward the officers. "Good evening," he said calmly, and then added a little dryly, "I'll come quietly."

Narcissa got to her feet, picking up Draco and going to the entry way with him in her arms. "Do I need to call our lawyer, Luce? I can have him down at the station probably before you even get there, if you'd like. I don't know why you can't just sit and have a cup of tea and ask your silly questions in the comfort of our own home..."

One of the officers gave Narcissa a look like he thought she was batty, and then turned back to Lucius and said, "Lucius Malfoy, you're hereby under arrest for uttering threats, unprovoked physical assault, intimidation, and accessory to murder."

"Accessory to murder? You must be _joking_. Lucy would _never_..." Narcissa started.

"Well _Lucy_ is under arrest, and I recommend you shut your mouth, Mrs. Malfoy," the same man sneered. "Now. You have the right to remain silent. Anything you say or do can be used against you in a court of law..."

"I'm calling our lawyer," Narcissa said, face going white. "And our parents."

***

Fran was frazzled. Her hair was frizzy and her glasses were askew, and she was _sick_ and _tired_ of answering the phone and subsequently avoiding answering the plague of questions about the whole mass murder mess. She couldn't say anything. "No comment", since Halloween, had pretty much been the extent of her vocabulary. There was ink from a broken pen smudged across her face--it had broken from furious number and note taking and sending out memos.

All of the doors to the building were blocked by armed officers, preventing the invading clicks of the media cameras, as well as gawkers from coming in and out as they pleased and harassing Fran anymore than the phone had already done. Being the attendant at a police station during such a profoundly traumatic time in the community was _not_ a walk in the park. No, it was nothing short of Hell on Earth.

Someone cleared their throat above her, and Fran shifted the phone at her ear on her shoulder, peering upward through smudged lenses. She recognized the woman to be the wife of Lucius Malfoy--more of a girl still, really--dressed to the nines, looking more posh than Victoria Beckham, and raising her artfully shaped eyebrows impatiently. How'd she get through the doors?

"Can I help you?" Fran asked.

"Yes. Take me to see Lucius Malfoy immediately," Narcissa said, her voice clipped. "After that, I wish to speak to your chief of police personally."

Narcissa had promised. She'd do whatever it took. Lucius didn't deserve to be where he was. His involvement was entirely her fault, and she had had enough hiding and lying.

So, she'd decided to use the only bargaining chip she had. They obviously didn't have anything concrete on Riddle yet, and she was the only person in the world who could provide it. She was the one single only witness to first degree murder committed by Riddle himself, and she knew she could use that.

She wanted to see Lucius first, however. She wasn't sure what would happen once she gave her statement, and she wouldn't risk not being allowed to see him.

"Now, if you please. Patience is not one of my many, many virtues," Narcissa added with a sigh, and began to tap her fingernails on the counter.

"Ma'am, he's currently in holding," Fran said. "You can't see him right now. But the police chief is in his office; if you really want to talk to him I can buzz in."

"No. I will see my husband first, and then I will speak to the Chief. And it will happen now," Narcissa said levelly and pulled off her large sunglasses for effect. "You don't understand how important this is. I'm not talking about frivolous desires or cheap wishes. I'm talking about something that will crack this entire case wide open. Make it happen."

"Uh huh," Fran breathed with exasperation. "Well I'm afraid it doesn't work that way, Mrs. Malfoy. I don't have the clearance to take you to your husband, no matter what sort of--"

"Mrs. Malfoy! How did you get past security?" It was the chief-of-police, a portly man named Herbert Wallace, who leaned on Fran's desk and surveyed Narcissa sceptically.

"She wants to see her husband, sir," Fran explained. "Apparently she's cracked the Riddle-case for you."

"Now, now, Fran," Herbert said smoothly. "We can't be referring to it as that. You never know who might be listening."

"I know something you will want to hear. But I need to see my husband first," she said. "God, I am so sick of red tape. Do you have any idea how many people I had to make eyes at just to get in here? And now you're wasting my time. I wouldn't come here promising something I couldn't provide. Now _take me_ to my _husband_."

Herbert raised his eyebrows. Well. If there was something to be said about the Malfoys, they could certainly provide. Lucius Malfoy had been holding back quite a bit on the recommendation of his lawyer, Herbert knew, but they weren't sure if whatever he might give up would be worth cutting a deal over. "Fine," he said curtly. "Follow me, Mrs. Malfoy."

Narcissa smiled brightly and then gave the woman behind the desk a snotty look. There was no point wasting time with the bottom rung of ladder in any situation, and Narcissa should know that by now.

As she followed the police chief, swinging her hips as she walked, she slid her sunglasses into her clutch purse. She smoothed her hair back, though there were certainly no flyaways that weren't supposed to be down, and the rest of it was all up as intended into a classy side bun. She wore a tight grey pencil skirt in some Italian textured material, and a vibrant red blouse, beneath which she had a black corset with matching knickers and suspenders. All of her accessories were black, and she'd planned the entire outfit around how she'd look getting out of a police car and dramatically hiding her face from paparazzi. Though, the corset had certainly been chosen with Lucius in mind.

As she was led down a hallway that seemed to end in a closed door, Narcissa felt both excited and a little disappointed. She'd rather been looking forward to walking through a full cell block and getting cat-called by all the inmates, though she supposed she'd watched far too much television. This was a police station in Salcombe, not a prison in a big city, and there were only four separate holding cells.

"Is he in there?" Narcissa asked, and without waiting for a reply added, "Let me in, then."

Herbert opened the door. "You've only got a few minutes, Mrs. Malfoy, no matter what you've got to tell me."

Narcissa rolled her eyes at him, stepped into the room, and shut the door behind her, her eyes on Lucius from the moment she could see him, and never leaving. She was a little nervous, like he could probably already tell what she was planning and would try to talk her out of it.

She didn't greet him aloud, but she did walk over to where he was seated and perch herself on his lap before he could stand. She crossed her legs and leaned one arm on the table behind her, looking up at Lucius with wide eyes.

"Shall I bring you some cigarettes to trade next time, my lovely jailbird?"

Lucius couldn't help but smile wryly and quirk an eyebrow. "Dare I ask what you're doing here, Cissa, dear?"

"You really oughtn't," she replied, running a finger along the side of his face. "I do have a plan, though. Right now what you should focus on, though, is the pretty, expensive little piece of clothing I've got on beneath my shirt. I think you'll quite like it. It's black and lacy."

"I wasn't aware this was a conjugal visit," Lucius said, pulling back slightly on the lip of her blouse, and peering down her cleavage.

"They might enjoy the show. I'm a very attractive woman, after all," Narcissa replied teasingly, stretching back languorously. "You can undo the top few buttons if you'd like. I don't mind."

Lucius did.

"Oh my," he said appreciatively, smiling. "Is this new, Cissa?" Lucius fingered the lace and the smooth, silky curve of her breasts, cock hardening more with every touch.

"I got it a few days ago. This is the first time I've worn it, though," Narcissa said with a smile. "You'll be out of here soon, and you can fully appreciate it then."

"If that's incentive to be a good boy, I might have to comply," Lucius said, leaning toward her and lightly kissing the skin of her neck.

"Didn't I say I had a plan?" Narcissa teased as she tilted her head back to give him easier access to her neck. "I've got it under control."

"You know I trust you, Narcissa," Lucius murmured, sliding a hand upward to cup her face. "Just please, _be careful_."

"I don't need to be careful. I can just be bossy," Narcissa said with a teasing grin. "Which is exactly what I intend to do."

Lucius laughed. "My wife is a force to be reckoned with," he said. "I love you, Cissa."

"I love you too, Luce," she replied. There was a knock at the door then, and Narcissa sighed softly. "These policemen and their bloody knocking. I suppose I'll see you later than. Draco says hello and sends hugs."

"Give him a kiss for me," Lucius said, sobering slightly and pulling away from her neck. "Tell him Daddy loves him."

"He knows," Narcissa said, and pressed one last kiss to Lucius' lips as the door opened.

"Mrs. Malfoy, the chief is ready to see you in his office. Time to go."

Narcissa got gracefully to her feet and gave the intruder a baleful look as she did up her blouse. She picked her clutch up off the table she'd set it down on and left the room, pausing in the doorway to blow a kiss at Lucius.

Right. Time to get down to business.

***

Herbert blinked at Narcissa, forehead creasing with confusion as he said, "Wait. Come again?" certain he'd misheard her, as she'd just told him that she'd witnessed T.M. Riddle shoot some bloke in the head. If she wasn't full of shite, and she could prove it, it could be the lead that would put the son of a bitch behind bars. If she was lying through her teeth to save her husband--which under the circumstances could certainly be a possibility--then Herbert would take great pleasure in tossing her designer-clad arse behind bars.

"Yale Harris? Surely you've heard of him. You _are_ the chief of police. And he did a really cute fall line last year."

Obviously Narcissa was not focussed enough if she let slip an air headed comment like that. Her heart was beating in her chest, though, and she was quite scared. She had no idea what sort of repercussions this would have.

"I can take you to the building it happened at. I'm sure you'll find some forensic evidence or something. And Bellatrix Lestrange can confirm it all, though I don't know if she will. She showed up right after, just in time to stop Riddle from killing me. In order to save me, she made a deal that Lucius would work for Riddle. So none of it was his fault, and he was forced into it to protect my life and the life of our son. So you can just let him go."

Yale Harris. _Well fuck me sideways_ , Herbert thought. That would certainly explain a few loose ends on the wrap up of the case, and it wouldn't hurt to re-open the thing and have another look if Narcissa could lead them to probable evidence. Hmm. "Well no, Mrs. Malfoy, I can't just _let him go_. This is certainly an interesting concept you're telling me here, but until there's concrete evidence to prove it, or if Bellatrix Lestrange deigns herself to support it, Mr. Malfoy is staying right where he is."

"In that case, I won't testify, and you've got no case at all," Narcissa said archly and got smoothly to her feet. "Have a good day."

"Look, everything doesn't work in your fucking favour just because you think you've got the whole world in your hands, all right?" Herbert snapped. Jesus Christ he was getting sick of this case, and at this point he _really_ didn't want to listen to her demand what she wanted, stupid spoiled princess. "You can't taunt me with your stories and bat your eyelashes and expect me to just hand you your husband on a silver platter. This is a mass attempted-murder investigation. We follow every tip we're given, and we'll follow yours, but until there's something to back up what you're saying, your husband stays where he is. No threat on your part is going to change that--if you want him to spend the rest of his life in jail, then withholding information and refusing to testify is certainly a great way to go about it."

"You can't convict Riddle without me, and you know it," Narcissa said, turning to glare at him. She did not like his tone, or his threat. "Where are you going to look for evidence? So far as you know, I could be making it all up. You _need_ me, and I need _him_. He has done absolutely nothing wrong that he wasn't forced to do out of fear for my life and our son's life. He's a good man. And you might think I'm foolish or selfish or spoiled, but I'm not going to put myself at risk if I'm not sure he's going to be let out. We have a son to think of, and I have no idea what will happen to me if I testify. I think Riddle has proven he has no qualms about murder, and if I'm to be his next victim for this, than at the very least, I expect my son to have his father. You've heard my offer and you know how to get a hold of me. If you're not prepared to treat me with the respect I deserve, I walk out of here right now. So. Are we finished, or would you like to amend your previous statement?"

"Respect? Listen, Mrs. Malfoy, I understand that you've got a family to think about, but so does everyone else. So do I. I haven't been home to see my wife and three kids since this whole thing exploded because I've been too busy trying to figure out what's really been going on in that organization. I'm not saying that Lucius Malfoy isn't a good man, and I'm not saying that he's done anything wrong. I am just _doing my job_. And yes, you're right. If you really saw Riddle put a gun in Yale Harris' head, we could unlock Pandora's box. You would give us what we need to put him away, and to give the poor people targeted by his insanity a little peace so they can move on with their lives," Herbert paused and sighed, removing his glasses and rubbing the bridge of his nose between his thumb and index finger. "You have to wait. I _can't_ change that. But if you help, I can get him out of here all the faster."

Narcissa pondered for a moment, and then sighed dramatically.

"If that's the best you can do, I must say I'm quite appalled," Narcissa drawled in response, but moved back towards the desk and sat down. "So do we do this here, or must you take me somewhere with other witnesses? This is going to be a terribly tedious day, I can already feel it."


	38. Goodbye (November 8th, 2007)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Where there is remembering, forgiving, and sweet karma comes back around.

The wind was cold and sharp, spinning leaves haphazardly around the depreciating crowd of mourners as they slowly made their way back to their cars, glancing over their shoulders as they went. Some were still crying, others had sobbed the last tear out of them. It still felt so surreal. And there'd been so much damage from the explosion that the casket had been closed--there'd been nothing of Stanton "Stubby" Boardman left to actually say good-bye to.

Leroy stood at the foot of the grave after one last hug from Stubby's mum and dad, and one last reassuring chorus of "He loved you, regardless," although reminding themselves was completely unnecessary. No matter what Stubby had become in the last year of his life, Leroy could only think about their childhood together, and their adolescence, and every single good and wonderful thing that they'd done together. He remembered once, when he'd been in hospital with meningitis, and before everything had been resolved, and nobody was sure what was going to happen, Stubby had said, "No matter what, Roy, you're the best. And I love you, man."

Leroy just wished he'd gotten the chance to say it back.

"Stupid git," he mumbled half-heartedly, wiping his eyes with the palm of his hand.

"He was himself, you know. How he used to be. Just for a moment, right before... but he was," Marlene said lowly, her voice ragged with emotion, whole body exhausted from crying. It had taken her some time to pull herself away from Gideon, but she'd had to. She and Leroy had both had a special sort of relationship with Stubby, and she didn't hesitate to lean her head onto Leroy's shoulder and wrap one arm around his waist. "I wish you could've seen it. Not the whole... Just that, I meant. Stubby coming back. You know what I mean?"

"Yeah," Leroy answered softly, putting an arm around Marlene's shoulder. "I've missed him for a long time," he added. "I can't pinpoint exactly when it happened, but one day he was Stubby and the next he wasn't, and I wish I could've smacked some sense into him."

"I did love him, you know. When he was him, I loved him. It was never quite like how I love Gideon, but I _loved_ him," Marlene whispered. "It was hard not to, with how he'd loved me for so long. If there was no Gideon, I would've ended up with Stubby. He knew that, I think, and could you imagine what knowing that would feel like? I just..."

" _Marlene_ ," Leroy said, squeezing her shoulder. "Don't do that. Don't blame yourself. If he was here he'd tell you to shut up."

"I just wish one of us had been able to do something," Marlene said, and then took a deep, fortifying breath. She turned her face into Leroy a little, wiping her fresh tears on the shoulder of his suit. "We tried, though. We did the best we could, and he knew that."

"Yeah. He just... he got in too far, and. Well. There's no changing it now," Leroy breathed sadly. Swallowing, he continued. "We're not. The band is done. It's his and we don't want to... we _can't_..."

"No," Marlene said firmly. "I've been thinking about it, and what you can't do is shut it all down. You know what it meant to him. You can't call it quits, not when you have every opportunity to--" Marlene stopped then, and straightened herself up, squaring her shoulders and looking at Leroy with the firmest, most hopeful expression she could muster. "You have to make him famous, Leroy. Make him a legend."

Leroy's eyes welled up. "Yeah. That's... that's what he wanted most. He wanted everyone to know who he was, to want to be like him... Maybe I owe him that."

"It isn't about owing. You don't owe him anything," Marlene said, turning back to look down at Stubby's tombstone again, picturing people coming from far and wide just to see it, and how brilliant Stubby would've found that. "It's about the dream you two had since you were kids. He could be the next Sid Vicious. I'll help. We could give him that, at least."

"Okay," Leroy agreed, chewing on his lip. And then, because he wasn't sure how much longer he could stand there knowing that Stubby was there, and dead, and gone, and never coming back, he said, "We should probably go."

"Yeah," Marlene said, but neither of them turned away just yet. "How are you getting to Gideon's? Everyone's meeting up to get drunk and play the Hobbled Gordons disc over and over and say goodbye, I guess. I assume you and Em are coming?"

"Yeah, we are. I've got my car," Leroy answered. "I guess this'll be the first time everyone is together since it happened. I saw Sirius."

"Yeah, they finally let him out a few days ago," Marlene said. "I haven't seen him yet. I guess they've finally finished talking to everyone, so we're allowed to talk to each other again. Though, there are all sorts of security measures in place to make sure we're not going to get attacked again. Narcissa has hired her own fleet of body guards, I hear. I'm not sure why she thinks she's so important. Lucius got let out around when Sirius did, too. Who knows what's going on with that family."

Realizing she was rambling, however, she stopped and then cast an unsure look at Leroy before bending down and picking up the roses someone had put on Stubby's grave. "Well Stubby, I guess this is goodbye. I know you think flowers are bloody stupid as shit, though, so I'll get rid of these. See you when I see you, I guess. And thanks for everything. I love you. I always did."

Leroy swallowed, his throat tight. "Good-bye for now, Stubby. Take care, mate. I love you."

***

"Oh, God, look at her," Hestia cooed, smiling down at Michele as Aidan held their goddaughter in his arms. "She doesn't seem very impressed by us, does she?" she asked, looking up at Edgar and Dorcas, as Michele made a face somewhere between contemplating screaming her head off and lying there quietly.

"She's really particular about people," Edgar explained. "And if anyone holds her and we're not around she squeals to peel the wallpaper off the walls. The doctor says she's got separation anxiety."

"Want to see something fucking sweet?" Dorcas asked, and then reached forward to take Chele from Aidan. In under ten seconds (albeit, seconds filled with cooing and soothing and making sure Chele could see her mother's face), Chele had calmed down to sniffling. "Isn't that terrifying? Ed's even faster than me. She really likes Anna, too. She'll get used to you guys, though. Don't worry. It just takes time. Want her back?"

"Hes, do you want to give it a try?" Aidan asked with a smile as little Michele latched onto one of his fingers. "Maybe so long as we keep her facing you... Christ, I can't believe you're _parents_. How is it?"

Hestia took the baby in her arms carefully, holding her so she could still see her parents. "She's so _tiny_!"

"Right now it's a lot easier than we thought it would be," Edgar said with a shrug. "Only that she's not a big fan of sleeping properly, and she wants to be held all the time. She eats like a trooper though, so she won't be tiny for long. Least if she can stop throwing some of it up."

"Whoa, Harry. None of that!" James suddenly said loudly as Harry reached for a bottle of beer. James got tenderly to his feet, wincing a little with every movement, and picked up his son. He was glad to escape where he'd been sitting on the couch chatting to Gideon, Marlene, Fabian, Caradoc, Leroy, and Emmeline. James hadn't known Stubby well, and though he was here in support of his friends, like everyone else, he was sure if he sat there much longer talking to those in the centre of the storm, he'd probably say something stupid. Lily wasn't here to remind him to censor himself, after all, and in times of high stress, James had already proved he didn't always take the dependable leader route that people expected him to take. Not that this was nearly as high stress as the previous few weeks had been.

"Want me to take Harry? I thought you were supposed to be taking it easy..." Aidan said, frowning. "You've barely been out of the hospital a day."

"Parenting is the only job you can never take a break from," James said, but nodded and let Aidan step forward and take Harry from him. "Ribs, is all. If not for my bloody crunched ribs, I'd be fine. The rest is just bruises."

"How's Lily?" Dorcas asked. She'd heard Lily had lost the baby, and she felt awful pangs of sympathy for her. She'd been so close to going through the same thing, and the very thought just... "Do you think she'll be out soon?"

"Lily's strong. She's healing fast. She'll probably be out next week or so," James said softly, mustering up a smile. "She's okay. We're okay. Or, we will be. You're all allowed to visit her, if you want."

"Hello," a quiet voice interrupted as Remus and Sirius came into the basement. Sirius wasn't sure how welcome he'd be (he'd gotten some curious looks at the funeral), but he and Remus had decided to brave it. Loosening his tie he offered everyone a tentative smile.

"Sir's!" Harry squealed, holding out his arms from Aidan's lap.

"Mate," James said, eyes warming, and he got to his feet once more, ignoring the pain, and wrapped his arms around his friend. He hadn't seen Sirius yet, since before all this happened. They'd gotten in touch a few times either by letters or passing messages on, but between the police intervention and James being in the hospital... James hadn't wanted to leave Lily alone, even after he'd been discharged early that morning, and they'd sat together and watched the coverage of Stubby's funeral on television together, only dragging himself away for the get together afterwards at her insistence.

Finally seeing Sirius again felt great, though, and he tightened his grip and hung on.

"I hoped you'd be here," Sirius said, and couldn't help but smile as he hugged James back carefully. "They won't let me in the hospital else I'd have come and saw you right when they let me out. I've missed you, Prongs."

" _Sir's_!" Harry huffed impatiently.

"I missed you too. So did Harry," James said, letting go finally. He hadn't seen Sirius since their fight when James had accused Sirius of being the spy. Sure, James had sent a letter, but it wasn't the same. So, he took a deep breath and said, voice low and intense and sincere, "I never meant it. I'm sorry. You know I was just... scared and panicked and... you're my brother, Sirius. You're family. You have to forgive me. Do you?"

Harry was now wiggling in Aidan's lap, but James had one hand on Sirius' shoulder, firmly holding him in place. Remus smiled at James, and then snuck by him to scoop up the impatient Harry and carry him closer to Sirius, whispering for Harry to "just wait one little second, then you can go to Uncle Sirius."

"Of course I do," Sirius said. "And I. Do." He winced. "I got there too late. I'm so sorry I couldn't have stopped it."

"It's okay. You tried," James said, smiling grimly. The smile turned a little brighter and he turned to address the room at large. "Sirius is back! And did I tell you all, Remus punched me right in the kisser? Seriously. Hurt like a mother fucker too!"

"'ucker!" Harry echoed brightly as Sirius took him from Remus' arms.

"Little ears, Jamie," Sirius grinned, hugging the little boy as he glanced around the room. "How're you twerp? And I guess this is Michele?"

Gideon cleared his throat, getting to his feet. It startled Sirius, who looked at him for a moment as though he expected Gideon to punch him in the face. Instead, he held out his hand for the younger man to shake. "I made a mistake. We all did."

"That's right, you did," Remus said unexpectedly. He hadn't realized he was so angry until he watched all of the apologetic faces nodding along wtih Gideon's words. It wasn't even an apology, and it was certainly far less than Sirius deserved. "Do you have any idea what you almost did? All of you?"

"For what it's worth, Ed and me never thought it was Sirius," Dorcas spoke up.

"Oh, you say that now. I bet you all think you suspected Peter all along, now that we know, but where were you when..." Remus began and cut himself off, clenching his jaw. Today wasn't about them. Today was about Stubby. It was about resolution and justification and the reuniting of old friends. Remus just took a deep breath and averted his eyes from the others. He had no right to shout at them, and if Sirius wanted to shake Gideon's offered hand without even waiting for the apology he was due, that was up to him.

"I'm not going to shake your hand," Sirius said with a shrug, although his tone was hardly angry. He had expected this, of course, but more than a few of the people currently sitting in the room had suspected that he wanted them put to their deaths. "I said it before and I'll say it again. I would _never_ in a million years have given you up to that son-of-a-b... booger," he added lamely looking at Harry.

"Sirius... I'm... James is right, we were panicked and--"

"James' apology isn't a cop out, though," Sirius said, cutting Gideon off. "But other than Remus he was the only one of every Order member who even _bothered_ to try and see me, or contact me, or say that they believed me. And he had just as much if not more to worry about than the rest of you. So no, I don't forgive you. I suspect I will, eventually, what me liking you all far too much than to be considered sensible."

"That's not fair," Marlene said, annoyed. "James not trying to visit you would be like Gideon not trying to visit Fabian. It's an unfair comparison. Did you try and go see Dorcas, or ring up Emmeline? You can't hold that against us. And I can't speak for everyone because I don't know what they said in questioning, but I know I didn't ever once suggest I thought you'd done it, no matter how hard they tried. I told the truth, yeah, but I didn't say..."

"What you didn't say was that you trusted him," James said defensively. "I made a mistake, yeah, but it was out of fear, and I did everything I could to support him after that."

"No one suspected Peter, though, James. In retrospect, yeah, it makes sense. The police weren't interested in hindsight, though," Fabian said gently. "I understand that suspecting you was a horrible thing to do. No one had any answers and we were all just trying to figure everything out. You have every right to be angry, but be angry for that. Not for us not visiting. Marlene is right."

"No she isn't," Dorcas said casually. "And he should be pissed at the lot of us. Sirius wasn't just hurt and healing in the hospital. He was arrested on suspicion of accomplice to murder, and not one of us went out of our way to vouch for him. If we had, they probably would've let him out a week ago." She turned to Sirius then, and added, "Sorry, man. Even if Gid can't get that word out, I have no fucking problem saying it."

"Thanks," Sirius said. "And they wouldn't tell me why I was let out anyway, only that they had two bits of testimony they never had before."

"One is probably whoever gave Lily that list," Emmeline mused. "And it's good to see you again, Sirius. Welcome back."

"Thanks, Em. Throat healing up good then?" Sirius asked.

"Good as can be expected," she said with a smile. Her voice was still raspy, but it worked and so long as she took her meds and didn't let it get infected, it'd be fine.

There was a frantic knock on the door to the basement then, and Fabian raised his eyebrows at Gideon. It was someone uninvited, then, because everyone they'd asked over knew they could just let themselves in. The knock came again, louder and more insistent.

"Want me to get it?" Aidan offered, already heading for the door.

"That door must be overjoyed," Sirius said, amused. "It never gets knocked on, only gets its knobs turned. Constantly."

"Is Sirius here? I know he is; that stupid, dirty machine of his is in the drive. Sirius?" Narcissa called as she breezed past Aidan, and down the stairs. Her eyes locked on Sirius, and she was grinning, ignoring everyone else. She looked so ecstatic she might actually hug him, but she just pressed a palm flat to her chest, beneath which she could feel her heart racing, and said, "Conspiracy, accomplice, blackmail, fraud, and _first degree_. Arrested and charged."

Sirius blinked. "You're _shitting_ me."

"Shit'y!" Harry clapped gleefully.

"Who? What?" James asked.

"And they're dropping all charges on Lucius. He was what I bargained for!" Narcissa added gleefully, ignoring James. "They even found the body. The case is practically air tight."

Sirius blinked again. Then he handed Harry (who protested loudly) to Remus, grabbed Cissa around the waist and started dancing her around the room. "You amazing woman!" he exclaimed, grinning widely.

Narcissa laughed wildly, throwing her head back and letting Sirius spin her around, regardless of appearances. This was something to celebrate. Her family would soon be safe, they could start fresh without having to always look over their shoulders. She could even go back to modelling, and Lucius to teaching if he wanted, and everything would be perfect again.

"Uh, what the fuck are you two _talking_ about?" Dorcas asked loudly.

"Are you... you're not talking about _Riddle_?" Gideon asked suddenly.

"Yes!" Sirius shouted merrily, spinning Narcissa on the spot and then dipping her. "The bastard is going _down_!"

"Down! Down!" Harry added, clapping his hands together as if to say, _I'm still here, Uncle Sirius! Dance with me instead_!

"Whoa. Whoa, whoa, whoa!" Fabian called. "Pause! No more dancing! Halt! End! Stop! It's explanation time. Like Hammer Time, but without the ugly pants and with a lot more talking. What's going on? Sirius? Narcissa?"

"Oh, well," Narcissa said airily. "A few months ago I witnessed a murder. Riddle is a sloppy boy. I don't think I'm supposed to tell anyone. Though, his arrest and whatnot will be on the news tonight. You can watch for yourself!"

"Narcissa got off from being axed herself because Lucius volunteered himself to be a Fashion Monkey," Sirius added. "Which is why he was working for Vol de Mort. But now he's a free man, and Riddle is going to _fry_ , and I think I'll go to his trial and fucking _laugh_ in his _face_. They couldn't get him on one bloody thing related to us. but now they've got him on Yale Harris, and they can search his files and personal property, and I'm willing to bet dollars to donuts that they'll find something that links him to this bullshit."

"I propose we celebrate with dinner. All of you, if you'd like. Not just Sirius. Tomorrow night in London. We can go to The Ivy, or maybe Nobu. My treat. I'm sure I can get us a table," Narcissa said frivolously and over-confident, with no regard to the considerable cost to treating a large group of people to a dinner somewhere like that.

"You think you can get a big table at The Ivy on a day's notice?" Fabian snorted. "You are so not that that A-list."

"I don't think we're really in much of a state to travel anywhere," Gideon commented. "And I actually don't think we're supposed to leave the area as a precautionary."

"Lily is still in hospital. It'd hardly be fair to celebrate anything without her," Edgar interjected. "And we've got the baby now. I don't want to leave her yet."

Narcissa huffed, but good-naturedly. "Fine. I might as well plan a proper party. How long do you think the trial will take? God, probably a couple months, right? Stupid bureaucrats. Anyway, I think it'll give me a good chance to announce my plans to return to modelling, don't you think?"

"Uh, I hate to be the voice of reason here," James said with a smirk, "but aren't you supposed to be laying low?"

"I have bodyguards. They're waiting outside. They'll keep me safe," Narcissa said. "Look, kisses to all of you, but I have to go celebrate with my family now."

And with that, Narcissa kissed Sirius on both cheeks, ruffled James' hair, and danced out of the room.

"She seems to think she lives outside the rules of reality, doesn't she?" Remus mused.

Dorcas snorted. "Yeah, well. It works for her. Whatever fucked up shit happens to her, she still manages to come out on top. It's fucking impressive."

"Language, Dor," Fabian said with a sigh, but the only person who seemed to be able to get her to cut back on the expletives was Molly, and Molly wasn't there at the moment, so Fay didn't hold out much hope.

"Ing!" Harry said, and then squealed as Sirius took him from Remus again and swung him around with a grin. "Harry, Harry, you silly thing. Stop trying to say all of the dirty words!"

"Dirty, dirty," Harry said, and then giggled. "Dirty wor's."

Marlene reached over and turned the music up. "I'm as glad as the rest of you that they're getting him, but we're here to celebrate life in general, and Stubby's in particular. So," Marlene said, and then tried on her best smile, though it was still a little watery. "Let's get this party started!"

Michele started to cry at the sudden volume increase, and wriggled in Hestia's arms. Edgar reached for her and she quieted, but was still sniffling at the sound. "Aw, sssh, Chele," Edgar cooed, smiling at her. "Might be wise to get her home," he said to Dorcas. "I think she needs a nap."

"Yeah, I guess. No rest for the wicked, or for parents," Dorcas said with a sigh and got up. "See you all later!"

"Actually, I should head out too. I don't want Lily to have to eat dinner alone," James said.

"Think they'll actually let me in the hospital if I walk in with you?" Sirius asked. "I want to see Evans. You want to go see Mummy with Daddy and Uncle Sirius and Uncle Remus, don't you, twerp?"

"Mama?" Harry asked, smiling and looking around.

"Yeah, I reckon they might," James said with a grin. "I bet she'd like to see you both."

"Well, if other people are taking off, Hestia and I might have to hit the road as well," Aidan pitched in. "But it was good for the whole gang to get together again. Christ, what an autumn it's been."

"But once the winter is over there'll be a good spring," Hestia said as she and Aidan stood. "June'll be good, at least," she added with a smile in Aidan's direction.

Aidan smiled back, cheeks turning pink. He was excited for the wedding too, but it was nothing compared to his family. "Unless my mother spontaneously combusts with glee first."

"Well at least yours is sensible about it," Hestia said. "Mine's convinced that I should have the wedding of the century, no matter what we've already planned. 'I've only got one child to enjoy this from Hestia Jones!' _Honestly_." Before she and Aidan made it to the stairs, Hestia turned and looked at Emmeline. "Em. I've got an important question to ask you."

"What can I help you with, Hestia?" Emmeline asked, struggling to make herself heard above the music. It was too loud for her still sore throat, though, and she looked hopefully at Marlene, who smiled and turned it down.

"Sorry. Guess I jumped the party gun. Go ahead," Marlene said, rolling her eyes and then distracting herself by kissing Gideon on the mouth.

"Will you be my maid of honour?" Hestia asked, the question puncuated in the middle by a loud, surprised sound from Gideon as Marlene ambushed him.

Emmeline smiled brightly and clapped her hands together excitedly. "Love to!"

Dorcas smirked and quipped, "And you trust this one with a hen party? Don't worry, Em, I'll help you plan."

"Don't underestimate Emmeline Vance," Hestia said with a grin. "You didn't share a room with her for four years, Dor. She's cracked more dirty jokes than Sirius and James put together."

"That's an exaggeration," Emmeline protested.

"And also a horrible lie!" James said loudly.

"I stand by it," Hestia said. "But yes, we should go. See you all later then. At Narcissa's party, no doubt."

"Us too. Bye everyone!" James said, and limped up the stairs with an arm latched onto Remus for support. "See you soon!"

"Call if you need anything, of course," Remus said over his shoulder, a concerned expression on his face. Funerals always unnerved him and made him worry about people. Marlene, especially, in this case.

"Mass exodus time," Dorcas said and waved as well. "Enjoy your party. We have to go be parents."

"Bye, everyone," Gideon called as they trooped up the stairs and out of sight. Hugging Marlene's shoulder he smiled down at her before looking at Emmeline, Leroy, Fabian and Caradoc in turn and saying, "Right. Let's get drunk."

***

"Lils, I'm back! And I brought visitors. One in particular you might be surprised to see," James said with a grin, heading into the room and kissing Lily hello.

"How was the par--" Lily started, but stopped mid-sentence when Sirius walked in the room behind James.

"Hey," Sirius said with a small smile.

Lily blinked. "Sirius Orion Cornelius Black, you get your arse over here right now and hug me," she demanded. He obliged and she pulled him tight to her even though it hurt a little bit. "I'm so sorry, Sirius," she said into his ear. "But thank _God_ you're out of jail. It was ridiculous enough of them to arrest you in the first place."

"Mama!" Harry called happily from his place in Remus' arms, and immediately started squirming to get to her.

Remus followed Sirius across the room and deposited Harry next to Lily on the bed. "Hello, Lily."

"Hello, Remus," Lily said smiling, wincing as Harry crawled over uncomfortable places to get in her arms. "Careful, sweetums, Mummy has a boo-boo. So. How was the funeral in-person?"

Remus shrugged. "I'm not sure how to answer that. It was... touching, I guess. Marlene and Leroy looked shattered. I don't know what of it was broadcasted, but the cameras there made a couple people more upset. Mr. Boardman asked them to leave afterwards, I think. They were trying to interview guests."

"Yeah, they showed a bit of that. The press can be such jerks sometimes," James said, deliberately toning down his language as he kept an eye to make sure Harry didn't accidentally hurt Lily.

"Did you go to the party afterwards, Sirius?" Lily asked. She'd wondered what the reception might be for him. She hadn't seen anyone outside of James, their parents and Remus since she'd woken up. "I mean, I assume so, since James brought you back here."

Sirius nodded. "Yeah. It was a little awkward," he said with a shrug. "I dunno. I don't want to sound resentful or anything, considering what happened to everyone, but I can't help but be a little more than angry about the way it worked out. Up to my getting released anyhow."

Remus took Sirius' hand and squeezed in support. "Do you think it'll all blow over, though? I mean, do you think we'll work it out with all of them though? Or will it be a bit awkward for ages?"

"They're family. It'll sort itself out," James said. "And you've got us in the meantime."

"I think this is a bit of a turning point, really," Lily said thoughtfully. "The Order is done. Once these trials are over, no matter what happens, not everyone is going to stay here. Gideon and Marlene will go to America, and so will Fabian and Caradoc. Emmeline and Leroy will likely leave again, and once Dorcas graduates she and Edgar are going to London with the baby... How. How's the baby?" she asked suddenly, eyes watering a little. At least one of them still had their child. It could've been so much worse.

James sat gingerly next to her and took one of her hands in both of his and looked down at it. It was so hard. "She's beautiful, Lily. She's completely amazing."

"How're you holding up?" Remus asked gently. "Just try to remember, things happen for a reason."

"Mama?" Harry asked with a quizzical expression on his face.

"Mummy's okay, sweetums," Lily said, kissing the top of Harry's head. Thank _God_ nothing had happened to Harry beyond the mark on his forehead. This was bad enough to think about, and she absently put her free hand on her empty abdomen. "I'm okay. I just. Well. The doctor's said it would take time, but that I'd be fine. And we can still have another baby. Someday."

"We still have options," James said softly. "We got lucky, really. Three out of four making it out of a crash like that."

Remus looked down then and whispered, "I've never hated anyone before, you know. And Peter... I just... Part of it is pity, I think. But I just don't know how he could do something like this."

"Yeah, talk about your desperate acts of revenge," Sirius said. "It felt quite nice to punch the shit out of his face. And then the fucker tried to make out it was me the entire time!"

"Tucker!" Harry chimed.

"No, Harry, bad word," Lily said. "I can see it from Peter's perspective. I doubt attempted murder was ever intended, in his mind. He probably just wanted us to get a scare for ignoring him, and treating him like he blended into the wallpaper. But I just can't... I _told him_ on the phone the night before that James and I were going to Kingsbridge. It just slipped out. We could've gotten away if I'd have just kept my mouth shut..."

"I told you not to think like that, Lils," James said fiercely. "It's so far from your fault that it'd be laughable if the whole situation wasn't so non-funny. It's as much your fault as it is my fault for not having the station wagon tricked out so I could outrun him."

Remus managed a weak smile. "We're okay, though. All of us. We should just be grateful for that and stop trying to steal blame away from those who really deserve it."

"For instance..." Sirius started, trailing off as he reached for the telly converter and flicked it on. "You're going to like this, Evans," he said gleefully, switching to the local channel, where the news was just coming on.

"Tonight, fashion mogul Thomas Marvolo Riddle was arrested in connection with the death of fellow designer Yale Harris. Riddle is also suspected of having a hand in the recent attacks on members of local group who call themselves The Order of Weed, an activist society known to target Riddle's company Vol de Mort."

"No way." Lily deadpanned.

"Yes way," James said, grinning. "Apparently they have a new star eye witness who led them to some pretty decent evidence."

"You'll never guess who," Remus put in, a hint of sarcasm in his voice. Narcissa was actually not the last person he'd guess. In fact, she was one of the few Remus thought could actually pull it off.

Before Lily got a chance to answer, though, the news continued and answered it for her.

"An ex-model of Riddle's claimed to have witnessed the murder, and, allegedly, narrowly escaped death as well. Inside sources tell us newly discovered forensic evidence locks Riddle at the scene of the crime. The case will go to trial in a few weeks time, and it seems the high profile nature of the whole situation have this nightmare set firmly on the fast track."

"Narcissa?" Lily questioned. "She finally came forward! Oh thank _Jesus_."

"Finally, what? You knew?" James asked, eyes widening and jaw dropping. "You knew she saw him kill a dude, and you didn't tell anyone? You didn't tell _me_?"

"Sirius knew too!" Lily said. "I overheard them talking about it, and she told me, and quite frankly I didn't want you, or Harry or anyone else to be killed, since we were apparently being watched by Riddle's cronies the entire time."

"Yeah, but Sirius is her cousin. You know how she is about family. She pulls the blood card all the time to try and get him to do shit for her," James said. "I can't believe you _knew_. That must've sucked to keep to yourself."

"Don't feel bad. Sirius didn't tell me either," Remus put in pragmatically.

"Narcissa is going to ride this back to the top of the fashion model food chain," Sirius said with a smile, absently watching the telly as Riddle was pulled out of a cop car in handcuffs and told the gaggle of reporters exactly where they could go. "It's quite a scandal, the media whore."

"Of course she is," Remus said, rolling his eyes. "She certainly knows how to make the most of things, that's for sure."

"She's a manipulative brat, is what she is," James retorted. "But we all sort of owe her. Hey, think we should pitch in and get her some kind of present for her party? Not like she hasn't got everything money can buy already..."

"We could build a statue of her out of popsicle sticks," Sirius suggested with a self-amused smile on his face.

"You're horrible," Lily admonished. "Ooh. You know what we _could_ do? Chip in on supplies and maybe Edgar could make her a piece of furniture."

"Isn't all of her furniture either designer or antique?" Remus asked. "I'm not sure it's as easy as all of that. If we want to do something for her, we might actually have to _do_ something, rather than get her something."

"Well that's annoying," Sirius complained. "Besides, what sort of gesture would Narcissa appreciate? Sky-writing 'Narcissa is a Goddess' or something?"

"We'll just have to think on it, I guess," James said. "We'll come up with something befitting of that little spoiled princess. You know, the statue idea..."

"Oh James, don't," Remus interrupted, laughing.

"A crown? Ooh, maybe a sceptre! I'll ask Hes if she still has her bedazzler, and we can steal the gems," Sirius grinned. "It's the thought that counts, right?"

Harry, who'd been quietly watching as the adults were talking, finally lost his patience and grabbed his mother's arm, saying, "Mama! Mama! Kisses?"

Lily laughed. "Yes sweetums, kisses," she said, pulling him close and planting a big loud one on his nose. "My goodness, I've missed you! And I miss everyone else too. I do wish they'd come visit."

"Well, I think until today, they weren't really letting anyone in but me and Remus and various parents," James said. "And you'll be out soon. Only a couple more days."

"And I'll be glad to be," Lily said with a sigh. "Being here is boring and it smells funny. I miss my house and our bed."

"I'll bring you a pillow from home," James promised. "Oh, and look, the dinner cart is here. Want me to go grab you something tastier from that cafe up the street? I'll risk life and limb to sneak you in contraband because I love you so much."

Remus smiled at the nurse bringing Lily's food. "You just gave away your plan, James."

"The hospital food is not that bad," Lily said, taking the tray from the nurse with a 'thank you'. "Would you like mummy's jelly, sweetums?"

"Yes!" Harry replied happily, reaching for the bowl.

"Things are looking up," Remus said softly, leaning closer to Sirius as James began feeding Harry the jelly. "Things are going to be great."

"I certainly hope so," Sirius replied, his voice quiet. He kissed the side of Remus' head. "When you hit rock bottom there's nowhere to go but up, right?"

Remus grinned wickedly and leaned in close to whisper, "Oh, I don't know. I was hoping at least one of us could still go down, just a little."

"You wicked, wicked man," Sirius grinned back. "Horribly wicked, in fact. But you know something?"

"I know lots of things," Remus answered softly. "What in particular are you referring to?"

"I love everything about you from your lewd suggestions to your obsession with leather-bound books," Sirius replied. "And I hope I never have to know what it is to almost lose you."

"You could never lose me," Remus assured him. "I'm in it for the long haul, Padfoot."

"Now see, Harry, that's your two uncles getting fresh right here in front of you. You're going to see a lot of this as you get bigger," James said as Harry chowed down on the jelly. "If you look real close, you can see that Uncle Remus has his big, devoted doe eyes on. That means he wants to drag Uncle Sirius off somewhere and have his way with him."

"Ish wah?" Harry asked through a mouthful of food, spilling the contents over his bibbed chest.

" _Honestly_ , the three of you are horrible role models," Lily mock-complained, rolling her eyes. "If the four of us rub off even slightly we're going to have a potty-mouthed child with little regard for propriety, and with an affinity for books, Hanson and sex in strange places."

James snickered. "Well, there are worse things. Right Harry?"

"Dada right!" Harry giggled. "Mo' sweets!"


	39. Lost Without Each Other (December 12th-22nd, 2007)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Where there is an Impala stuffed with shoes and Juicyfruit, towel clad men, and our usual penchant for sex and its related activities.

**DETAIL ORIENTED** \- _DECEMBER 12TH, 2007_ \- Issue 39, Volume 2

**Murder, Money, and Masturbation... Mmm!**   
_Salcombe is a soap opera (and here I thought I'd gone small town)_

By Rita Skeeter | Editor

Oh sweet, salacious sin! Oh gorgeous, gratuitous gossip! Oh mad, messy maiming and murder! 

Riddle's gone and done it again, folks. Can I just brag for a minute here and ask, who called it? Who fucking called it? Yes, that is right. I, the rapturous, risqué Rita Skeeter, totally nailed the virgin on the cherry with my suppositions about Riddle. 

Out of 13, count 'em: 13, attempted murders by one Thomas Marvolo Riddle, there are currently 12 "victims" left alive, one of which was actually kidnapped because the tight-arse didn't even shell out the big bucks on assassins with the stones to go through with it. Those are not very good odds, even for a bloody batshit crazy bloke like Riddle. To make the best of it, he 'logically' decided that attempting to off the members of an anti-Riddle organization in one day was the best way to not get caught. On stand the psychopath announced that the deaths were meant to be "artistic and beautiful", and then proceeded to have a lengthy conversation with his right hand about how much of a genius he was before security carted him off.

Out the courtroom doors he could be heard singing _The Sound of Music_ 's "Favourite Things".

By this time you all know about that cute little band of hippies who lived through hell and got 5.1 million to split between them after Vol de Mort Fashions was liquidated and Riddle sent to the loony bin. But, just in case you're all too busy masturbating over new MILF Dorcas Meadows or her working class sex machine fiancée Edgar Bones, or even Gideon and Marlene McKinnon-Prewett, if passionate/possibly crazy men or feisty scarred chicks are your kink--and lest we forget the marathon make-outers, pretty boy Fabian Prewett and his bobby-turned-artist lover Caradoc Dearborn... where was I? Oh, yes. Just in case you pervs are all too busy wanking to whichever of these highly televised casualties makes you dewy in the nethers, allow me to summarize.

Riddle is bouncing off the walls of a padded room somewhere, and his company Vol de Mort Fashions went three sheets to the wind. The cheap bastard had his house and cars listed as company material, too, so if you're real quick, you can snap up some hideous piece of his home décor from the police auctions.

Bellatrix Lestrange--Riddle's right-hand woman and number one fangirl--got minimal time for covering Riddle's August murder of Yale Harris, and for general illegal-type dealings, though I have no doubt the woman will get parole in a year or two. She's too wild to be caged up for long.

As for the rest of them, there weren't any interesting charges. Though when Rabastan Lestrange sold out everyone from his big brother, Rodolphus, to the creepy little wannabe-rocker son of The Ministry music executive Barty Crouch, there was quite a ruckus. Crouch Junior went postal in the court room and tried to stab his way past security with a pen. Great parenting there, Crouch Sr.

Now I know what you're thinking. Rita Skeeter, you sexy thing, why speak of all this when it's all over the news anyway? Never fear, dear readers. In print as in bed, I will never disappoint.

What wasn't publicised was that before the murder attempts, various members of the Order of Weed core group--yes, kids, all members that were attacked--reported to the police various fears, reasons, _and_ evidence (including those slashed tires and broken windshields, you'll remember) that they, you guessed it, would be attacked. Police dismissed this completely and left the bittle things all on their onesie to fight the big bad Fashion King himself. Who, apparently, was also obsessed with killing one Harry Potter, aged _one years old_ , because some crazy fair fortune teller claimed the kid was his greatest nemesis. The young Potter was in the vehicle with his parents when it was run off the road, and survived with nothing more than a lightening shaped scar on his head. Now that is one hell of a story to tell the girls he'll want to bed in a decade and a half, give or take. Foolproof pick-up line, mark my words.

Well, that's about enough of that, don't you think? Time to party hardy and find a new fashion icon. (I recommend someone with _taste_.) 

As always, keep your ears up and your eyes open. 

This is the mouth with the message, signing out.

***

"The flights aren't too bad, but I've been having trouble getting a hold of a realtor," Gideon was saying as he and Fabian walked side-by-side down the street toward Molly's house. It was late December and most of the landscape was stark and bare, and the two brothers stuffed gloved hands into parka pockets as they crunched over a snow-covered sidewalk that had yet to be cleared off. Since the settlement from Vol de Mort had gone through, Gideon, Marlene, Fabian and Caradoc had gone into express-mode where moving to America was concerned, and were hoping to be out of England by the end of January at the latest. "I don't know if they're afraid of British people, or too busy to call back, or if the four I've called in the L.A. area all have no idea how to use their voicemail, but it's really starting to piss me off."

"I found some flamingly queer man who thinks it's his duty as a queen to make sure gay people get great housing opportunities provided for them," Fabian said loftily. "Too bad you're married to a girl. He's emailed us a bunch of nice places already, and we only told him what we wanted like, four days ago."

"Lucky you," Gideon mumbled, but he was smiling, and jabbed Fabian playfully in the arm with his elbow. Three houses away from Molly's after rounding the corner, Gideon couldn't help but notice the strangest sight gracing Arthur's front lawn. "What in the name of Prince Charles' ear wax...?" Gideon started to ask, but trailed off into a stunned silence.

Amidst the Christmas lights and the tree in the window, there was Rita Skeeter lounging in a lawn chair and wearing the smallest yellow and red polka-dotted bikini that Gideon had ever seen in his life. Next to her were three space heaters and an obvious orange extension cord trailing toward the garage.

"Uh," Fabian said, stopping a few feet from Rita and staring at her with a look of total confusion on his face.

She smiled up at them from her spot on a blanket covered lounge chair, her two propped up umbrellas apparently not keeping the wind out well enough because despite the heaters melting the snow around the cardboard they were propped on, she still had goosebumps all across her skin, and her nipples were hard as rocks.

"Hello boys," she greeted them cheerily and took a sip from a thermos that was more Baileys than coffee.

Still completely dumbfounded, Fabian managed to shake his head and ask, "What the hell are you _doing_?"

Gideon quirked an eyebrow. "Does this have anything to do with the message you left on the answering machine about your 'book'?" he asked, cocking his head. "And if it is, how the fuck did you come to the conclusion that sunbathing in our yard in December was the solution to your problem?"

"You haven't been returning my calls. I figured I had to do something fantastic," Rita said, as though she were being completely practical. "I'm writing this book whether you help or not. If it's unofficial, I'll just be taking a lot more liberties with the details. I'm only thinking of you, here."

Gideon exchanged a look with Fabian. "Your logic is _astounding_ ," he said. "Jesus. Hasn't our sister been out here nagging you about catching your death?"

"Yes. She brought me a top up of coffee for my Baileys when she realized I wasn't leaving. I don't think I've even been out here half an hour yet," Rita admitted, and then, gestured to the window. "If you watch, though, she looks out the window and frowns at me every two or three minutes."

"Right. Well, maybe I'm just in a really good mood, but you'd better come in. We can talk while you warm up," Fabian said, and grinned brightly at his brother. As if to pre-emptively cut off any argument from Gideon, Fabian said, "There's a girl in a bikini on our lawn in the dead of winter. I think that merits a little give and take."

Gideon shrugged. "Says the gay bloke."

"It's because I'm gay that I'm allowed to. Marlene would kill you," Fabian said with a grin, and then turned to Rita. "Put on whatever clothes you have with you and come inside."

Rita grinned, wrapped the blanket around herself and stepped into some red stilettos. "Lead the way."

Of course, Rita had brought clothes with her. They were in her car, however, and she figured this would suffice for the moment. Not like Fabian would get hard thanks to a glimpse of her thigh, and even if Rita did happen to be scar free, Gideon was sickeningly devoted to Marlene. Rita knew. She'd done her research.

In the kitchen Molly was already putting the tea on. "Lucky the children are out at Christmas party with Arthur," she tutted with a glance at Rita's attire, and also thanked Tony Blair that Ron and Ginny were sleeping upstairs and need not witness Rita's serious lack of clothing. Sure, Marlene worked at the pool, but she always came home in her clothing instead of looking like some... _scarlet woman_. "Did anyone want cookies? Pretzels? I can dig into the Christmas stock since you boys have brought a guest home."

"I would just _love_ a biscuit," Rita said, draping an arm around Fabian and winking at him.

Fabian stared for a moment and then burst out laughing, draping an arm around her shoulders as well. "You are one tacky little flirt, Rita Skeeter."

"I'll take that biscuit to go, and perhaps I can take your brothers somewhere a little more private so we can... talk," Rita said, waggling her eyebrows jokingly.

"We can just go downstairs," Gideon suggested, taking a mug of tea as Molly handed it to him and thanking her by kissing her on the cheek. She passed out tea and biscuits to Fabian and Rita (with a frown on her face) as well, before Gideon led them downstairs and Molly turned her attention to her dishes. "So," Gideon asked he sat in his favourite chair and took a sip of his tea. "What's the focus of your book, exactly, Rita? The Order, or Riddle?"

"The story," Rita corrected, settling herself on the couch and taking a small bite of cookie. "I want it all. The people, the relationships, the build up, the tension, the drama, the attacks, the slowly spiralling mental state of Riddle. All of it. I want the world to hear the whole twisted tale of intrigue and crime and bad fashion sense."

"You've got your hands full then," Gideon said. "And you know all about how the Order came about since we told you in that interview last... Spring, was it? What _specifically_ do you want us to tell you?"

"I need to sit down with you when I have my tape recorder, but I want to know all the little details. I want to know about the missions and the arrests and the drama between Gideon and Marlene, and how Fabian managed to convince a man of the law to drop out and join an illegal group. And I want to know what it felt like to watch all this bad shit happen to everyone you care about," Rita rambled. "I want to know the interesting things. And I want quotes. And for you to sign some release papers, once I get them all drawn up. I can't claim official and it'll be a lot harder to get published if you don't."

"That's a lot to ask," Fabian said. "You kind of want to publish our lives."

"The world is gagging for it," Rita said. "And I was here. Let me do this. I'll give you vetoing rights. Within reason."

Gideon let out a frustrated breath. "This was all hard enough to go through the first time," he said quietly, trying not to get angry. And it wasn't anger directed at Rita, either, as he was sure she'd do them justice-- _within_ reason. But it was the last two months since Halloween, and the badgering from police, and the testimonies, and the media, and everything else... Gideon just wasn't sure how much any of them had left in them to offer Rita. And then everything leading up to it? "Fabian's right. Your asking to write a biographical account of the last two years for twelve people. That's a bit much to chew, for you or the rest of the world. Our fifteen minutes'll be over soon enough, and people will forget about us, and about Riddle, and about this, and your book will be irrelevant."

"No it won't," Rita insisted. "It's an amazing story. Even once your so-called fifteen minute is over, this will still interest people for years. Decades. This is one of the biggest, dumbest murder attempts... _Fuck_ , it was a conspiracy. He... it affected so many people, and you guys were right at the center of the maelstrom. You have to get how this is important. Nothing like this has ever happened before. Ever. You... Don't you see? This information belongs to the people! It isn't right of you to keep it to yourselves."

"It isn't right of us to keep the personal events of our lives private?" Gideon questioned, furrowing his eyebrows. "And it is a lot. Take asking about me and Marlene, for example. That's not even two years. That's the better part of our lives."

"To you it's a story, but for us it's real, Rita," Fabian said, taking a sip of tea. "It's not as easy as all that for us."

"Oh, bugger off,” Rita said loudly, rolling her eyes at them. “Don't talk to me like I don't understand what it means. I'm a journalist. Reality is my life. But don't you think it'll feel good to tell the whole world you were right all along when they all just thought you were crazy? You can share something real with them. You can connect with people you've never even met. I'm willing to sit in a bikini on your front lawn in December to get your attention. Can't you at least give me just a couple hours of your time? It'll be cathartic. I'll even get you drunk and fuck you afterwards."

"You're begging," Fabian pointed out dryly.

"So?" Rita retorted, voice challenging. "I have no problem with begging for this. This is an amazing opportunity, and you two are ready to throw it away. I bet I can convince the others, but if I don't have the Prewett brothers, I don't have a book."

"Mmm, yes, and it feels so nice to be this important," Gideon said with a sigh. "I don't know, Rita. I'm not sure I like the idea of exposing everything poignant in my life for the sake of getting a few laughs or a few tears out of people I've never met, and probably won't meet. What do you think, Fabian?"

"Well. I don't know," Fabian said. "It had a happy ending, didn't it?"

"I guess so," Gideon agreed, looking at his brother and chewing on his lip. He was quiet for a few moments, considering the situation, and eventually he took another sip of tea before saying. "All right."

Rita grinned brightly, and then turned to face Fabian.

"Hey, he's the tough nut to crack. I'm notoriously easy," Fabian said with a wink. "We're in."

Laughing, Rita leaned off the couch, abandoning her blanket and planting kisses on the cheeks of the two men across from her. "You won't regret it. I swear."

***

"Have I told you today how happy I am your exams were scheduled early?" Sirius asked, running lathered hands over Remus' back and up around his neck. "I don't mind getting up before noon after a double for this."

Remus leaned into Sirius' touch and tilted his face up towards the spray of the shower. He turned around then, facing Sirius, and slid his hands down Sirius' sides, letting them come to rest on his hips. It was an early start for Sirius, perhaps, but a late start for Remus. He had a few days off of work, however, and he could scarcely think of a better thing to do on a cold morning than take a hot shower with Sirius.

Ignoring Sirius' remark, Remus asked, "Do you remember the first shower we took together? When Lily almost caught us in the act and you decided sticking your hand underneath my towel while she was still in the room was a good idea?"

"It _was_ a good idea," Sirius grinned, nuzzling into Remus' wet hair and sliding a hand along his face as he pushed his crotch forward. "You made a wonderfully indecent sound."

Remus made a sound in his throat at sensation and then chuckled, voice low. Tilting his face and pressing his mouth against Sirius' ear, Remus said, "Kind of like that noise, you mean? ...How long do you think we have before we run out of hot water?"

Sirius was about to reply when the buzzer sounded over the running water. Groaning he said, "Better question. If we ignore whoever that is, how long until they go away?"

Remus wanted to ignore it too, but when the sound came again, he thought it might be important. Sighing, he pressed a quick kiss to Sirius' lips. "Look, I'll go see if it's important. If it isn't, I'll be back in a minute or two."

Remus knew Sirius well enough to hop out of the shower right away without giving Sirius a shot to try and change his mind. Remus towelled off his hair briefly before wrapping the towel around his waist and threw a smile at Sirius before heading out of the bathroom.

Pressing the button on the buzzer, Remus asked, "Yes?"

"Well hello there. Rita Skeeter. Can I have a few minutes of your time, please?"

Remus blinked for a moment. "Uh. Now?"

"Yes. Now. If you're doing something kinky, you can just let me up and I'll watch until you finish. But it is rather important."

"Just a... just a moment," Remus said hesitantly. Taking his finger off the button, Remus called, "Sirius, Rita Skeeter wants to come up."

"What the fuck for?" Sirius called back, agitation obvious. Still, the water shut off and Sirius came out of the bathroom a few moments later with his wet hair stuck to his face and towel hitched low on his hips. "Should we get dressed or give her something to fawn over?"

Remus quirked his eyebrows and then pressed the button again. "Come on up," he said to her, electronically unlocking the front door for a few seconds and then running his hands through his wet hair. "She said it would only be a few minutes."

"Well that's kinky beyond your normal standards," Sirius smiled wryly, tightening his towel. "I'll put on the tea."

"I'm not kinky," Remus responded archly, giving Sirius a stern sort of look. "I just want to make sure she knows we were in the middle of something so she won't feel inclined to stay long."

When she finally knocked, Remus fastened his towel on his hips more securely and let her in with a smile.

"Well, well, well," Rita said with a wide replying grin, trailing her fingers across Remus' chest as she walked past him into their apartment. "Mostly naked wet men. Just what I love. Quite a scar you have there, love. Where'd you get it?"

Remus flushed. He'd actually forgotten about the scar, but her touch and her mention of it made him quite vividly aware of his state of undress. Perhaps he hadn't entirely thought that through. Sirius was having a bad effect on him.

"Uh. I was attacked by a dog as a child," Remus answered finally, feeling uncomfortable as he shut the door behind her and made his way into the kitchen, positioning himself close to Sirius.

"Tea?" Sirius asked as he set the pot on the stove, grinning unabashedly at Rita after giving Remus a quick, reassuring peck on the cheek.

"Coffee, if you have it," Rita responded and sat down at the table, crossing her long legs in front of her and raising her eyebrows as she looked between the two men. "I won't keep you long. I just have one very important question for you."

Snaking an arm around Sirius' waist, Remus looked at Rita over his shoulder and asked politely, "What can we do for you, Miss Skeeter?"

"Rita is fine, please. And I'm writing a book," she said with a grin. "The Prewett brothers have given us permission, so now I need to talk to everyone else. An interview or two, and I'll be out of your hair. Can I count on you?"

"A book about what?" Sirius asked, confused, reaching into the cupboard for the coffee canister. "The shite with Riddle you mean?"

"Yes," Rita said. "All of it. The whole story. The Prewetts are on board, but having you two too would really round out the story."

"What do you mean by _the whole story_?" Remus asked.

"The papers published the facts. I want to publish the people. You are all incredibly fascinating, and even what little I know of you all has me enthralled," Rita said. "You are what make it interesting. Not _just_ you. I mean you plurally. The Order. I plan on talking to all of the core. So what do you say. Are you in?"

Sirius shrugged and glanced at Remus before moving around him to get mugs. "I don't know. If Gid and Fay are all right with it I guess. But I mean, you're not going to fuck with the facts to try and make it more _juicy_ than it is, are you?" Sirius' real fear (though he'd never say it out loud for fear of sounding cocky) was that if Rita were writing a book she'd do the same thing a lot of the papers had done; made Sirius out to be some heroic seeker of justice because he pummelled Peter's face, while simultaneously a victim because all the blame had been loaded onto him.

"Don't you think it's sort of juicy enough?" Rita asked. "Look, I love drama. I love it. And you've read Detail Oriented. You know how I write. I have a flair and a flourish. I embellish. But I don't fuck with facts."

"How explicit is it going to be?" Remus asked. "I don't want... my whole life to be..."

"Oh, Remus. You're the one that was left behind in all of this. The one who had to watch all of his friends hurting and healing and in jail. You're almost the most tragic out of the lot of them. It'll be explicit in that sense," Rita said, and relaxed back into her chair from where she'd been leaning forward as she spoke. She trailed her eyes up and down Sirius and Remus' bodies, and then smirked. "But, it won't be _explicit_. They won't publish it if it's porn. But you will be outed. It's important to the story. I trust that doesn't bother you?"

"Well no," Sirius said. "I'm the disgraced son of the Black family, Rita. Everyone and their monkey knows I shag blokes. Or suck cocks in broom closets anyhow. What are you going to do, write a chapter about each of us? I mean, I don't really feel that the pony my parents gave my for my seventh Christmas is relevant to Peter Pettigrew having his head wedged up his arse, you know?"

"You got a pony for Christmas?" Remus asked, bemused, not giving Rita a chance to reply.

"What, that's shocking?" Sirius asked, although he was blushing a little. "His name was Tipper. Mother and Father sold him when they found out James and I painted the pot leaf on the side of the hospital."

"Yes, it's shocking. Somehow I just can't picture you astride a fat little pony," Remus said, not quite managing to hold back laughter. "Oh, the life of privileged children. I'm sure you and Narcissa had many fun times hanging around the stables and tying ribbons into your horses' manes."

"Jackass," Sirius scowled. "How is it that Aidan is a cowboy because he rides, but the image of me doing it makes you think of ribbons? Am I really that gay?"

"Oh my. Sorry if I've offended, cowboy. Some time you'll have to put on..." Remus trailed off awkwardly, clearing his throat and remembering they had company. He swallowed the unfinished quip about leather chaps that had been on the tip of his tongue and looked guiltily at Rita.

Rita was just grinning. "No, no. Carry on. Don't stop on my account. The look you were giving him just now was _just_ beginning to hint at something interesting."

"We'll talk about how dashing I might look in a cowboy hat and boots some other time," Sirius said, waving his hand dismissively as the kettle started whistling. "Why are you here again, Rita?"

"Permission. Once I get verbal consent, I'll set up interviews and bring releases to be signed," Rita said casually. "The releases will protect you too. Making sure you have rights if I misquote you. I'll keep all the recordings. You'll do it, right?"

"What do you think?" Remus asked Sirius softly. "Gideon and Fabian have agreed. Do you think it'll be weird, though, to have a book out there with us in it?"

"No weirder than the photographers who camped outside of the apartment during the trial," Sirius answered. "I'll do it if you're alright with it."

"I don't really see a problem with it," Remus replied hesitantly.

"Great," Rita said, getting up and clapping her hands. "Then I'll be in touch. Unless you're going to get rid of the towels and give me a reason to stay, I have other people to talk to."

"Phone in advance next time, will you? I got up early to get clean," Sirius said. "And I guess you won't be having coffee?"

"To clean _what_ , is the question," Rita said, getting up. "And I'll pass on the coffee. This didn't take as long as I thought. Ta ta, boys. See you later. It's been fun."

Remus frowned at the lecherous look she was giving Sirius. "Good bye, Rita."

"Don't let the door smack you in the bum on the way out," Sirius called as she left, sticking the coffee back in the cupboard. "D'you want tea, Moony, since I've gone and boiled the water?"

"Sure. I'm a little chilled. It is December, after all, and we are standing around with wet hair and no clothes," Remus said. "A nice cup of tea is definitely the ideal way to warm up, don't you think?"

"Bye, boys! Have fun!" Rita called laughingly over her shoulder as she left and shut the door behind her.

"Is that supposed to be sarcasm, Remus Lupin?" Sirius asked, looking at Remus and quirking an eyebrow. He dropped his towel. "Oh, whoops! How silly of me!"

"Well. Goodness. You're clumsy," Remus said, then dropped to his knees in front of Sirius, looking up at him and nuzzling his thigh. "Let me get that for you."

***

Harry had been looking out the window and bouncing all morning, pointing at the yard and squealing, "Mama! Dada! Snow!" until James and Lily had finally caved in and fitted their son into his snowsuit before dressing themselves and letting him loose in the backyard. Building the snowman had been James' idea, and he seemed to be the one doing all the work while Lily tried to teach Harry how to make snow angels. Harry seemed far more fascinated with cramming as much snow as he could into his mouth.

"Harry, sweetums, Mummy said no," Lily admonished for the millionth time, and sighed. Well at least he wasn't eating anything yellow.

"Come on, Harry! This is your first snowman!" James called. "Lily, stop distracting him. Snowman! It's snowman time!"

"No man!" Harry squealed as James scooped him up and carried him over to what he'd built already.

"That's the head, Harry. Want to put eyes on him? Want to put eyes on No Man the Snowman?" James asked brightly. "Come on, Lils. Let's find some stones for eyes."

"I'll grab some out of the candle jar on the kitchen table," Lily suggested, getting to her feet. "And I'll grab a carrot out of the icebox for good measure."

"Cool," James said, and then jumped as a car he hadn't been paying attention to honked. He turned and looked, and noticed a shiny black Impala with a familiar blonde behind the wheel.

"Lily, we have company," he called as the car pulled into the driveway.

"Hello, family!" Rita called brightly as she shut off the car and climbed out, dressed in purple leggings, white thigh high furred boots, and a white fluffy parka, hanging open to reveal a purple and black plaid turtleneck. She pulled off a pair of purple sunglasses and squinted into the daylight as she posed. She loved first impressions. "A day outside playing, how nice. I swear I won't interrupt for long."

Lily came out of the house, carrot and rocks in hand. "Company?" she asked, confused. "Who'd come over without..." she trailed off, spotting Rita, and couldn't help but raise her eyebrows at Rita's garb. "Oh, Miss Skeeter. Can't say we were expecting you. Er." Rita Skeeter was hardly normal 'company' for the Potters.

"I just have one quick question for you," Rita said, leaning against her car. "I'm writing a book. Will you do an interview with me and sign some release forms? Gideon and Fabian Prewett are on board, and so are Sirius and Remus, sexy little homos that they are. Shame, that. So. What do you say?"

"You convinced Remus to do an interview with you? Really?" James asked, shocked. "Moony must've been in a hell of a good mood."

"He was naked," Rita confessed, leading forward as though telling him a secret. "They both were. I think they were quite eager to get me out of their apartment, to be honest. But yes, they agreed."

"Well that's hardly surprising," Lily commented thoughtfully. "Remus and Sirius naked, I mean, not them agreeing to you writing a book about them. Or... what's it about?"

"Sir's naked!" Harry cheered happily, clapping his hands and trying to wriggle out of his father's arms, presumably to eat more snow.

James whirled him around, entertaining his son and paying very little attention to Rita. If she could sell Lily, James wouldn't be fussed.

"The story of the Order of Weed and its epic battle with the head of Vol de Mort Fashions, Thomas Marvolo Riddle," Rita said. "Mostly about the people involved. What sort of human effects it all had. The human element is much more interesting than the boring facts."

"The 'epic battle' of the Order versus Riddle?" Lily questioned, quirking her head slightly and looking thoughtful. "When you say the 'human element' you mean what? The blood sweat and tears that went into the hullabaloo, or Halloween? I mean, I'd just like to know what we might be signing up for here. It hasn't exactly been... the best few months."

"No, but you won," Rita replied. "You won 425,000 pounds each, in fact. That's nearly a million per couple. It was a journey, and it had its ups and downs. Halloween, I will admit, was quite a huge down. But, as Fabian said, it had a happy ending. What can you lose from sharing your story? I don't understand why you're all so reluctant. I'm tired of spouting out the same old arguments. Four others are already in. Can I count you two too?"

Lily sighed. "The forms you'll have us sign... they'll give us some say in what you use?"

"No. You won't get any say. It's my book, not yours. That clear? I'm not here to mislead you," Rita replied firmly. "But it'll give you legal rights if you think I've misquoted you. Which I won't, because I'll be recording everything. It isn't my intention to make anyone look bad. I just want to tell a story. This is an amazing, amazing story. It's unbelievable. I just want to share it with the world. And hopefully get rich out of the deal, too."

Lily couldn't help but smile. "Alright, alright. We'll do it then."

"Hear that, Harry? We will! Mommy said so, so we will, because what Mommy says goes, got that little man? You will always, always listen to your mommy," James said, throwing Harry up into the air and catching him again as he laughed with glee.

"Fabulous," Rita said. "Well, I'm off then. I'll be in touch to set up an interview. Kisses, family!"

"Bye, bye," Lily said, and she James and Harry waved Rita out of the driveway. Once she'd honked halfway down the street, Lily said, "That woman could probably talk George Bush into resigning if she put her mind to it." Handing Harry the carrot she was still holding, she asked, "Do you want to give No Man a nose, sweetums?"

"Yes, yes, yes! Nose fo' No Man!" Harry said brightly.

"I think that's the most complex thing he's said yet!" James said excitedly. "He must really like the snowman."

"I think he just really likes snow. Period." Lily shook her head. "What am I going to do with the two of you, hmm?"

"Love us forever and ever," James said, setting Harry back down to play and stepping towards Lily to kiss her, then rub some snow into her hair that he'd picked up when he'd put Harry down. He grinned brightly at her and said, "I love you, Lils."

"Love you, too," Lily replied with a smirk, and then reached down, scooping a handful of snow and smushing it right in James' face. "Look, Harry!" she exclaimed. "Daddy's a snowman!"

***

"All I want is to ask you and your husband if..."

"I don't care! My time is too valuable to waste on you. Now quit pestering us. I have enough _real_ press organized, I don't need you," Narcissa replied, impatient.

"I'm not normal press. I'm writing a _book_ ," Rita said, annoyed. "I just need a minute or two of your time."

"And I don't care to _give_ you a minute of my time," Narcissa retorted. "Which I've already told you about a hundred times."

"Narcissa?" Lucius questioned, coming into the hall with Draco (who was holding a stuffed terrycloth bunny) in his arms and frowning at Narcissa's redface and obvious irritation. "What's going on?"

"That stupid Skeeter woman won't leave me alone," Narcissa said with a sigh, lifting her finger off the button and facing Lucius. Apparently Rita wasn't ready to leave her alone just yet, though, as she began buzzing insistently. Narcissa took a deep breath, reached for her son, and said, "Lucy, can you make her go away? She's driving me insane."

Lucius shrugged, handing Draco over and moving over to the intercom. "Hello?" he asked, holding the button down. "Could I ask why you're so determined to bother my wife?"

"I'd like to speak to both of you, actually," Rita replied. "I'm writing a book and I'd like your input. I'm only asking for a few minutes of your time now to pitch my case, and if you agree, we can set up an interview. If not, I'll leave you alone. But I'm _not_ leaving until you at least hear me out."

Lucius furrowed his eyebrows and glanced at Narcissa. "A book about what?"

"The Order and the mess with Riddle. About all of the people involved. Considering Narcissa is the highest profile person with anything interesting to say, I want her--and you, Mr. Malfoy--on board," Rita said, employing a little flattery. "The Prewett brothers have agreed, and so have the Potters. And Remus and Sirius. I spoke to them yesterday."

"Sirius agreed, hmm?" Lucius couldn't help but smile at Narcissa, whose expression had changed slightly. Without saying anything else to Rita he pressed the button to open the gate. "The least we can do is hear her out."

Narcissa was now pouting, but she wasn't quite as annoyed. "You're terrible. I asked you to get rid of her, not invite her in for tea."

"Well she's a person, Cissa darling, not a bug to be swatted away," Lucius said.

Narcissa sighed and stretched up on her tip toes to kiss Lucius. "You're too kind, you know that? I don't know what's happened to your edge."

Lucius smirked. "I no longer have to put up with your cousin and Potter as students. It's been amazing stress relief, although I must admit I get a little tense when they're over for dinner."

The mention of Sirius reminded Narcissa that Sirius had agreed to be part of Rita's whole mess. She couldn't imagine why.

The doorbell rang then, and Narcissa went to answer it. "You'd better not take long. I have things to be getting on with."

"Hello to you too, Mrs. Malfoy. You are even more radiant in person than in your adverts. And this must be Draco. Hello, you little blond devil. You're going to be a right prat with parents like yours, aren't you? Yes you are."

"Are you calling us prats, Miss Skeeter?" Lucius asked, arching an eyebrow.

"Certainly not," Rita said brightly. "Just look at you both! Narcissa and your unique temperament, and Lucius and your intelligence and class. Mix that together, and what have you got? A beautiful, over-confident, brilliant, snobby, creative enigma. What a child, what a child."

Draco looked at her, and then looked up at his mother with an unimpressed look on his face.

Narcissa laughed then, thinking the look very fitting of Rita's little speech. "Well. Come in then. Did Sirius really agree to help you?"

"And why are you writing a book about what happened?" Lucius asked, shutting the door and then leading everyone toward the sitting room. "Don't you think there's been enough publicity as is? It's a worn topic."

"I'm not just going to regurgitate the facts. I want to write about each of you, of all the people. People are most interesting in any situation, not the facts. I wish to expose the human element."

"Well, if Sirius has said yes, I suppose I can agree as well. It'll just be a matter of finding the time. I'm very busy, you know," Narcissa said flippantly as she sat on her favourite chair, letting Draco crawl down and play with his terrycloth rabbit.

"I have barely yet begun to explain," Rita said with a bemused smile. "After all of that fuss, you're that quick to agree?"

"You underestimate Narcissa's value of family," Lucius commented as he sat in his own chair and crossed his legs. "Would you like a drink, Miss Skeeter?"

"Certainly. Some brandy, perhaps, if you have it. And can I assume you will also be a part of my book, Lucius? From what I hear, you tend to do as your wife does, or as she either requests or requires," Rita said, her smile now with a bit of an edge as her curiosity sparked. She really should wait until she had her tape recorder, but Narcissa and Lucius were both just so very fascinating, she couldn't help it.

"Don't speak disrespectfully to my husband in my house," Narcissa said, voice sharp. "My husband has saved my life and my heart too many times to count, and I'll not have you, petty little leech that you are, criticizing his actions."

"It's fine, Narcissa," Lucius said. "I like to keep my wife happy, Miss Skeeter." Getting up again he walked over to the bar to mix a drink for Rita and for himself. "I hardly think it's appropriate, however, for a writer with little credibility beyond trivial, self-published commetary to make any presumptions about her potential interviewees. You're not much for manners, or etiquitte, I take it?"

"There are more important things than manners or etiquette, in my opinion," Rita said, twirling a piece of blonde hair around her finger. She crossed one long leg over the other--she was wearing her shiny black snakeskin textured pumps today--and smoothed out her skin tight knee length hot pink skirt as she accepted the glass from Lucius. Long pink nails curled around the crystal glass. Her slightly see through black lace blouse clung to her curves (and her black bra) as she positioned herself on the chair and grinned at the couple before her. "Admittedly, my lack of has gotten me into a wee spot of trouble in the past. I trust your sensibilities are not so delicate as to be offended."

"Just get to the specifics, will you?" Narcissa demanded. "What will you be asking of us? I may yet change my mind."

"And just how, exactly, do you intend on portraying us?" Lucius added, reseating himself before taking a sip of his own drink. "We have family and careers to consider."

"Only the truth, as true to you as I can be," Rita said. "I'm a journalist at heart. I just wish to tell this story."

"And make a penny off of the rest of us," Narcissa returned.

"Don't be coy. You got quite a nice emotional trauma settlement out of the mess. I know you have nothing against making money," Rita said with a laugh.

"I'm fine with it," Lucius said. "I don't know how much time either of us can give you, however."

"If I could have two hours of your time, that would be enough to get me started. Two hours, one afternoon sometime over the next few weeks," Rita said. "We will find time."

"Easy for you to say. You have no idea what our lives are like," Narcissa replied. "Nonetheless, I have committed. We will find time, won't we Lucy?"

"Yes, I suppose we will. We won't be here for the New Year, however as we're visiting my parents, so I suggest you schedule before that," Lucius said. "Otherwise you'll be waiting."

"Noted," Rita said with a smile, and then tossed back the rest of her brandy. "Then I suppose I will be off. I'll be in touch the next day or so to set up a time. Thanks ever so."

Narcissa watched the woman's graceful move to her feet, then stood herself and tossed her hair over her shoulder fluidly. "You try too hard, Skeeter. Beauty and grace should be unconscious attributes, not deliberate attempts."

"You're a model, Narcissa. You look pretty for a living. I'm just a lowly writer," Rita said, eyes sparkling. "It is my mind and my tongue that I rely on. Not my beauty or my grace or, indeed, my sex appeal."

"Good day, Miss Skeeter," Lucius said, his tone slightly warning as he stood and put a hand on Narcissa's shoulder. The last thing Rita needed to do was insult Narcissa's intelligence, and Lucius could feel the retort boiling up in his wife. "We look forward to your call."

"Little wench," Narcissa bristled.

"Bye bye now!" Draco called as Rita let herself out.

"She's absolutely insufferable. I told you we ought not let her in," Narcissa said, glaring at the now closed door.

"She does think quite a lot of herself, doesn't she?" Lucius commented, ignoring the irony in addressing this statement to Narcissa. "Perhaps if her book is successful, some of that ego might be justified. Although I certainly doubt it would make her easier to tolerate."

"Though if you ignore the prat bit, I quite like what she said about Draco," Narcissa said with a smile. "He will be a brilliant enigma."

"How could he not be considered how he came to be? And by whom?" Lucius grinned. "A religion professor and a naughty school girl?"

Narcissa smiled at her husband, and then at little Draco, still on the floor playing with his rabbit. "Though, something must be said for her sense of style. It's hideous, of course, but she certainly has a flare of _something_ , doesn't she?"

***

Leroy's mum, Eleanor, had always been big on Christmas, and this year it seemed as though they had a lot more to celebrate. After what had nearly happened to dear little Emmeline, Eleanor had really packed a punch to her annual family get-together, sending invitations out to her nieces and nephews and their families, all of her own siblings and their spouses, as well as her ex-husband's parents. She'd extended the invitation to Leroy's father as well, but Paul had never been much for the holiday's, and Leroy had seen him in London while the band had been on tour. Eleanor doubted he'd come all the way to Salcombe, particularly during such unpredictable weather.

But the house was decorated and twinkling red and green. The underside of the tree was stuffed with presents, and Eleanor had gotten Leroy to put the insert in the table before filling it to burst with cookies and cakes, punch and eggnog. Everyone had starting coming by at around six, and by seven the party was in full swing as people danced and sung along as Uncle Pete and Leroy played guitar and bass respectively. Auntie Enid joined in on piano, and a rousing chorus of "Rockin' Around the Christmas Tree" began, so loudly and cheerfully that Eleanor barely heard the pounding knock at the door. Exchanging a confused look with Emmeline beside her (everyone was there! Who else might be stopping by? Surely not _Paul_?), Eleanor headed for the front door, opening it tentatively.

"Er, hello there," she said, not recognizing the woman on the other side. "Can I help you?"

"Season's greetings!" Rita said brightly, her red lips curling up into a red smile. She was wearing a long red coat that hung to her knees with black buckles, and beneath she wore pointy black four inch heeled boots. Beneath the dress she had a beaded black cocktail dress over some fishnets. She'd gone for classy and busty and slightly old fashioned, and she thought it had come off really well. Of course, she had to get in the door before she could take off her jacket to show it off. "I'm Rita Skeeter. I'm here to see Leroy. Goodness, it's cold out. Can I come in?"

"Oh! Well, yes dear, I'd hate for you to catch your death," Eleanor said carefully. "Leroy never mentioned he'd invited a friend today."

Rita stepped inside and dropped off her coat dramatically. "Ah, well. You know Leroy," Rita said vaguely, looking around. "Where is he, speaking of the little rascal? I'd love to say hello."

"Rita Skeeter?" Emmeline said suddenly, spotting Rita. Her voice turned from surprised to guarded as she realized Rita was likely here for a story, and Emeline tried not to jump to conclusions else anger at Rita for crashing a family function might cause a scene. "How unexpected."

"Emmeline, good to see you again," Rita said, noticing the girl's cool demeanour. "I just popped by for a quick word with Leroy."

"Leroy's just over there by the fireplace, playing music as usual," Eleanor said, pointing him out. "Can't even rest for Christmas the silly boy. But my brother Peter loves playing with him so much."

Once Rita had headed toward him with a sway of her hips, Eleanor looked curiously at Emmeline and said, "Who on Earth is that? She looks like a high-class hooker." Indeed, Rita's fishnets were catching eyes from everyone around the room, particularly the older male population. Some whistled.

"That's Rita Skeeter. She's a writer," Emmeline said. "She can be a bit pushy, though. Not that I don't trust Leroy to push back, but I think I'm going to go join him."

"All right," Eleanor said. Uncle Pete and Leroy's playing and singing came to an end then, and as everyone clapped he glanced around for Emmeline, but his line of sight was intercepted by a woman in skimpy black dress and very overdone make-up.

"Er," Leroy started, unable to stop himself from making a bit of a face at her.

"Leroy! Rita Skeeter. Pleasure," Rita said, holding out her hand.

Emmeline came up behind her, smiling, and kissed Leroy happily before he had a chance to shake her hand. It wasn't motivated by jealousy, for Emmeline was not the jealous type. She was, though, still wary of Rita's intentions in coming to a family Christmas party uninvited. "Amazing, as usual."

"Do I get one of those too, Emmeline?" Uncle Pete asked brightly.

Emmeline laughed and leaned over, pecking Leroy's uncle on the cheek. "You were also amazing, Uncle Pete."

"You're a doll, Em, humouring an old codger like me," Uncle Pete said, and then turned his attention to Rita, eyes widening a little as he took her in. "Now who're you, little lady? I don't suppose we've met before. Bit odd at a family get together."

"Oh, don't you worry. I'm not family. I'm an acquaintance of Leroy and Emmeline. I just stopped by to have a quick private word," Rita said, but made suggestions with her eyes and body language so as to send him off with hope.

"I see, I see. Well, I'll leave you lot to it then," Uncle Pete said, and smiled widely at Rita before heading out to mingle.

"Effective," Emmeline said with an amused smirk.

"Acquaintance?" Leroy questioned, confused. "This isn't really the time for a private word about... whatever it is you want to have a private word about. You know her, Em?"

"She fancied herself unofficial reporter for the Order," Emmeline informed him. "I heard from some of the others that she's writing a book."

"Indeed I am. And I need you, Leroy. I need another perspective on Stubby. He was, after all, the only casualty. That makes him far more interesting than simply a deceased band front man."

Leroy's eyebrows shot upward. "Who do you think you are?" he asked, anger evident in his tone. How _dare_ she gate crash his _family Christmas party_ and then talk about the Stubby like that? Stubby, his best friend since he was three, Stubby, who'd only died not even two months ago! "He's not some plot device you can just use at your own convenience, and I'm not in the Order and neither was he, and I don't intend on giving you 'perspective'. Go home, please."

Emmeline slid an arm around Leroy's waist and glared at Rita.

"I'm sorry," Rita said immediately. "I didn't mean to offend. I _don't_ mean to offend. I'm going to talk to Marlene as well, but I need an outside voice. Look, don't you want his story to be told? I can turn him into an icon. Or help to, at the very least."

"Of course I want people to know who he was," Leroy answered. "But how can I trust you to do him justice, even with me and Marlene feeding you information? You obviously don't have any problem overstepping boundaries and overdoing things to get _your_ point across. Stubby isn't a footnote, or a fact to scratch off of your to-do list."

"This book isn't about my point. It has nothing to do with me. I'm just writing it. It will be the truth, and largely dependent on quotes. How you speak about him will wholly colour his character," Rita said. "And I think personal experience is a little more telling than the facts, isn't it? According to the facts, he was a drug addicted asshole who drove Marlene away, and then in a desperate bid to get her back, signed up with the bad guy and got himself killed, and nearly her as well."

"You're not doing a very good job recovering from your poor first impression," Emmeline said softly. "You might do best to cut your losses and leave."

"What do you want me to say? Without opinions I can quote, I can only rely on the facts. They paint him rather black, don't you think, without much to flesh out the greys and whites? I'm a journalist, and I've never met him. I would have no choice but to stick to..."

"The facts, yes, so you've said," Emmeline finished, and sighed.

"The facts are true," Leroy said with a shrug. "But that's not who he was. It's not... you can't..." This was impossible. _She_ was impossible. "I. Fine. I guess. I don't know. I don't want people to make assumptions about him, and if you're going to write about him no matter what I do I'd rather you at least inject a bit of truth into it."

"You will not manipulate him with the memory of his passed best friend," Emmeline said firmly. "Do you know what it is to lose someone so close to you? Do you know how constantly Stubby is on his mind? It isn't right of you to play on that."

"Who's playing?" Rita asked, watching Emmeline contemplatively. "I think I'd like to speak to you as well. You're the kind of girl who's always got her eyes open, aren't you? Why don't I talk to the both of you together? That way you can keep an eye on me, and I can get two stories at once. Sound good?"

Emmeline looked up at Leroy and said softly, "Don't agree out of a feeling of duty. Just do what you feel."

"I. Okay. If Em's there, that's fine," Leroy said, looking down at his fiancée. "That would be better."

Emmeline smiled at him, and then turned her face towards Rita, the smile hardening just a touch. "Not until after the New Year, though. We have family obligations for the holidays, and seeing as you've already crashed one party, I think we'd rather enjoy the rest."

"That's fair," Rita said, and then looked around at all the good cheer. "I don't suppose I'm invited to stay, am I? It'd make Uncle Pete so very happy."

"It's a family party," Leroy said, smiling slightly. "As much as Uncle Pete might like your cleavage, it's probably best you leave. But have a Happy Christmas." 

Emmeline giggled a little at Leroy's words and disentangled herself from him. "I'll walk you out, Rita."

Rita watched as Emmeline kissed Leroy again, and then walked with the girl towards the door, picking up her jacket off of the hook she'd absently hung it on. "You're a classy bird, Emmeline."

"Thank you," Emmeline said calmly. "And you are a tactless vulture. No offence."

Rita laughed. "None taken. You're protective of him, that's all."

"He's just lost his brother," Em replied. "Of course I am."

"You're really happy though, despite it all, aren't you?" Rita asked.

Emmeline put her hand on the door handle and looked up at Rita. "Life is more than the short term. We may not be married, but we're in it for the good times and the bad. Things'll get better."

"How very balanced of you," Rita quipped and pulled on her coat. "Happy Christmas, Emmeline. I'll speak with you after the holidays."

Emmeline nodded and let the woman out, closing the door behind her and heading back to Leroy. "Well."

"She is quite possibly the most horrific and yet equally fascinating woman I've ever met," Leroy said, picking up his bass and absently strumming a few notes. "And I'm not sure I mean that in a good way."

"I agree. But forget about her. Let's enjoy the party--and the season--the best we can," Emmeline said, putting her fingers on the strings of his bass and smiling at him. "Teach me a song?"

Leroy grinned back a little shyly. "You might like this one," he said quietly, starting in on a deep but simple beat that matched the hoarse bass of his voice. He never really was much of a singer; that was always Stubby's forte. Leroy was just the man behind it all, and it still felt incredibly strange to be the last of them standing. "My body is curled, and wrapped around you. Let's not untangle ourselves from this. We should stay. We should ignore the alarm, and the daylight. Nothing else matters. It's just our tumble of feet, blankets, and heavy breathing. The day can wait. Everything can wait for you."

Emmeline's smile widened and she rested her head against his shoulders as her finger tips felt the movement of his hands and strings. She felt the eyes of his family on them, his song had drawn some attention, but she didn't care.

"When did you write that?" she asked softly, her other hand coming to rest on his hip, beneath his guitar. "It's beautiful."

"Halloween," Leroy answered. "Just after you left. I was going to play it for you at the show that night. Stubby was actually going to let me have a solo because he liked it. And then he left practice, and I left to get you for lunch."

"Oh, Leroy," she said, and her smile simply widened against his shoulder even as her eyes grew shiny with emotion. "You would've had the whole audience in the palm of your hand, just as captivated as I am."

"Well your reaction was the only one that mattered," Leroy said, kissing the side of her head gently. "It still is. It always will be. I love you, babe."

"Oh, I love you too," Emmeline replied, turning her face up for a kiss, a real kiss.

"Oh look at the dears," Eleanor exclaimed, clapping her hands together as her eyes welled up slightly. Poor Leroy had been so close to losing Emmeline, and they were all so lucky to still have her in their lives. "Bless them! You too are just so adorable, I _swear_."

Leroy laughed against Emmeline's mouth. His mother was something else.

Emmeline laughed as well, but raised a hand high in the air, fist clenched in a celebratory motion as she wrapped her other arm around his neck to deepen the kiss. Not obscenely, of course. She was no exhibitionist and she was with his family, but she felt so happy here with him. And after all, she was a rockstar's girlfriend.

***

Michele had starting smiling at him two days ago, and since then Edgar had been so over the moon his jaw hurt from smiling back. He and Dorcas (though she was much better at being unobvious about it) were giddy about her first Christmas, and had blown nearly a full pay check of Ed's on toys the baby really didn't need. Or wasn't aware existed. In fact, of all the plush toys they'd been given before she was born---bunnies, bears, even a little piggy--the only one Michele bothered with was the rocket Dorcas had gotten at the Baker's yardsale.

Today she was sleeping in her seat on the kitchen table between her parents and her godparents, who were having tea and cooing over how big she was getting, how she already had enough hair to stick into adorable little blonde pigtails on top of her head, and how Dorcas had finally caved in and let Edgar put her in a pink dress.

"I think her hair is trying to be curly," Hestia commented, taking a bite out of a biscuit.

"She sure is pretty, isn't she?" Aidan said, gently touching the tassle on her tiny little slippers. "Did Anna knit these for you?"

"Yeah. And of course she's cute. She's fucking gorgeous," Dorcas quipped and positioned herself on Ed's lap, sitting down perhaps a little harder than necessary and then kissing Ed quickly in apology. "She made the biscuits too. I must admit, I'm going to miss it here. She helps us out a lot."

"I swear she'll be coming to London every other weekend if Pa'll let her come," Ed said a little sadly. He was really going to miss his parents, and his siblings, and their friends, but thanks to the settlement he and Dor finally had the opportunity to go ahead and do what they wanted. They'd gone earlier in the month and found a little house for themselves, and Ed had already finished the important bits of furniture for them that they didn't already have, and as of January 15 they wouldn't be residents of Salcombe anymore. They'd be living and working in London.

After all the school Dor missed because of Halloween and the trials, she'd just put her foot down about finishing her A levels, and Edgar had to admit there didn't seem much point to stick around for them anymore, not when Mad Eye Moody was practically harassing their answering machine to get Dorcas into London and into his shop. Ed himself had decided against moving on in school, and instead had found a paid apprenticeship of his own with a custom furniture company. Before he could start his own he needed a reputation.

"We have a third bedroom, so you know you're welcome yourselves," Edgar said, trying to sound nonchalant. Of everyone besides his mother, he'd miss Aidan the most; they'd been best friends since they were kids, and Aidan's move to Kingsbridge for school had proved itself hard enough to handle after getting used to seeing and speaking with one another on a daily basis. Ed was sure he was going to rack up his and Dorcas' phone bill with long distance charges.

"Hear that, Hes? We have a free place to stay in London," Aidan said, eyes twinkling and mouth twitching as he tried to keep a straight face. "Might come in handy for house hunting in a few months."

Edgar blinked. "Wait. What?"

Hestia grinned widely. "Aidan's been offered a job with a television studio in London," she explained, looking at Aidan and beaming. "Some producer heard his voice on the radio when she was visiting family in Kingsbridge, and came over to see if Aidan had a face for television. So they're going to start him off with a few little jobs on air to see what he's best suited for, and in a year or so he might get his own show."

Looking at Aidan, dumbfounded, Edgar said, "You're. She. You'll be in London? Where we'll be?"

"Indeed we will. I'm going to be a TV star," Aidan said, grinning widely.

"Good thing I like you, Hestia," Dorcas said with a grin at the other woman. "I'll bet we'll be spending all sorts of time together. Lucky for you, I'm awesome. Hey, Bonesie, are we going to have a nanny or something if we'll both be working? We can afford one now."

"Yeah, I figured," Edgar answered, still in shock over his good fortune. Aidan and Hestia living in London. What were the odds, really? "So long as we don't become one of those couples that let the babysitter raise the kid. I want to be there for all of Chele's important stuff, and the not so important stuff too. Speaking of, when are you two going to start popping them out? Aidan told me once that he wanted his own riding troupe."

"Lets get through the wedding first," Hestia said. "Mum keeps going behind my back and trying to change the plans on me. I found out yesterday that she'd hired a caterer when we were just going to have a big barbeque. _Speaking of_ ," Hestia added, smiling wryly and coping Edgar's tone, "set a date yet, you two?"

Dorcas looked down and admired the ring on her finger. "Maybe a summer wedding. We could get rings tattooed on our fingers, what do you think, Eddie? Or maybe we could do something even more radical."

"Like what?" Aidan asked, grinning at Dorcas. "I don't know if Ed's the really radical sort, Dorcas. And you are parents now, and the parents of my god daughter, no less! Speaking of, do you think you'll get her baptised?"

"No," Dorcas said immediately. "When she gets old enough, she can choose her own religion. Right Bonesie?"

Edgar nodded. "God father and mother are more like 'titles' anyway. We don't expect you to help guide her spiritual journey in life or anything. You're her guardians if something happens to us, and can spoil her all you like, pretty much."

"Well that won't be a problem," Hestia said. "I'm fairly sure anyone who meets her is going to fall head over heels in love with her."

"Don't tell me that," Ed grinned. "I don't want to be walking behind her for the rest of her life with a scowl on my face and a bat in my hand."

"Oh, come on Daddy Bones," Dorcas teased. "Once she grows up, she'll be hot like me. You're going to have to watch your daughter date one day. Oh, I can't wait until she gets big."

Aidan laughed and shook his head. "You're something else, Dorcas."

"She's not allowed to grow up, sorry," Edgar said, suddenly feeling a little overwhelmed by the thought of his little girl dating boys, and the ideas boys had, and how he and his friends acted when they were younger. "Fuck. I'm doomed, aren't I?"

"Those are the woes of being a parent, or so I'm told," Hestia said. "I certainly don't want a daughter like myself. I was the weirdest child... personally I think I'd be better with boys anyway."

"I grew up with girls. Three sisters," Aidan said with a grin. "I did enough glaring and threatening and honour defending. Least I know how boys work. You've got a task ahead of you, man."

"You say it like it's a chore. It's going to be fucking fantastic," Dorcas said with a grin, smile turning soft as she looked down at her daughter, smoothing her hair affectionately. "She's ours. We get to raise her. She is our little bundle of twenty-four hours a day seven days a week responsibility. We're going to do a good job, though. Aren't we, Rocket?"

Realizing she was damn near cooing at her daughter in public, Dorcas looked up at the others sheepishly and wrinkled her nose.

"Babies, you know. I'm still bad ass. Just... not all the time," Dorcas explained jokingly.

"Ugh, what's it like to still be a badass?" Hestia asked, grinning. "I trailed off somewhere after fifteen. This girl," she explained, pointing at herself, "got James Potter to pose in her thong one New Years Eve. And now here I am getting married and planning to buy a house. Is it just me or is everyone growing up too fast?"

"Love and babies and not going to school anymore'll do that to you," Edgar replied. "I don't know that I even think about how old I'm going to be next. I figure I've got at least fifteen years before my hair starts to recede and I'll have something worth panicking over."

Dorcas looked shocked by the talk of aging, and ran her fingers through Ed's hair contemplatively before saying, "Don't worry, you'll still make me hot, sexy man." The doorbell rang, then, and Dorcas got up to go answer it. "Are your parents expecting anyone?"

"Not that I know of," Edgar answered, leaning back in his chair and trying to peer out the window. He'd been so paranoid since Halloween. "Be careful, Dor."

Dor smiled at him in what she hoped was a reassuring way, but she did check to make sure the baseball club was still next to the door. She peered through the peep hole and then grinned and threw the door open. "Wow. Hookers canvass door to door now? Thanks, but everyone here is sexually satisfied. Anna and Joe even still get it on."

"You know, I like you," Rita said, smirking. "You're spicy. My name is Rita Skeeter. I want to ask you and Mr. Bones a few questions."

"Do you now," Dorcas said, not moving to let her in, instead leaning casually against the doorframe and getting a good eyeful of her outfit. Her long sleeved, tight, bright blue off the shoulder dress hung to thigh high, and her tall, cuffed, above the knee brown leather boots came nearly high enough to meet its hemline.

"Let a girl in. It's freezing, and I left my jacket in my car," Rita said, pushing messily curled hair back behind her ear.

"Fine," Dorcas said, and then opened the door. "Guys, we have company, and she's slutty."

"Rita Skeeter? Ooh, what a pleasure!" Hestia said in surprise. She'd seen Rita around Salcombe (the woman wasn't exactly easy to miss), and when she'd first come to Salcombe, Hesia’d had to endure Gideon and Fabian's complaining about her rag, and her bad taste in clothing. "I've heard a lot about you. Is it true you castrate professionally?"

"I've got my doubts you're selling cookies," Edgar said, turning to look at Rita. As much as she made him uncomfortable, however, he still couldn't forget his manners and asked, "Tea or something?"

"Sure, I'd love a cuppa. Cute kid," Rita replied, sitting down next to Hestia and turning to face her, whispering loudly, "And every rumour starts in truth. Pleasure to meet you. What's your name?"

"She's Hestia. I'm Dorcas, that's Aidan, and Ed just went to get you a mug for tea," Dorcas said. "Seriously, what'd you come for? As much as Hestia seems excited for your company, I'm a little confused."

"I'm writing a book about, you know," Rita said, waiving her hand generally. "The whole mess. And I want to interview you and Ed. It's pretty much a miracle you didn't drown. And your parents are the only parents I'd really worry about suing me, so I need you on my side."

Dorcas laughed. "My parents won't sue you. I don't even talk to my parents. They don't give a shit."

"Sirius told me you'd been to see him," Edgar said, coming back into the kitchen and handing Rita her cup before sitting back down. "And we're not going to be around, sorry. We're moving next month."

"Oh. Where to?" Rita asked, disappointed but still determined. She could get it in before the end of the month, she was sure.

"London," Dorcas said, sitting back down once more on Ed's lap.

Rita grinned. "Oh really."

"You look like the cat that caught the canary," Aidan quipped.

"I've arranged for a flat in London. Closer to my publisher, and a better writing environment. I'm too old to live with my father anyway," Rita said with a grin. "Looks like we're going to be nice and close."

"Well," Edgar said with a considering breath. "I suppose we can't turn you down until we've heard you out. I don't think that'd be very 'working class sex machine' of me."

"Oh, you read that little gem, did you?" Rita said with a grin. "Well, you are tasty. Isn't he?"

"Of course he is. And he's mine," Dorcas said with a smirk.

"You're cute too. Aidan, was it?" Rita said, giving him a casually contemplative sort of look.

"My fiancée," Hestia said with a smug smile, crossing her arms and quirking an eyebrow.

"While we're all getting possessive..." Edgar said as Michele woke up in her chair and started sniffling. Dorcas moved so he could reach for her and take her in his arms, soothing her.

"Down girls," Rita said with a smile. "So what do you say? Sit down and talk to me about the Order for my book? A bunch of people have already agreed. The Prewett brothers for starters, and Sirius and Remus too. Bless them, they answered the door wet and towel clad. The Potters and the Malfoys have signed on, and the rockstar and his girl, Leroy and Emmeline. But of all the murder attempts, I think yours was most dramatic. And I think I'll get some really great quotes. What do you say?"

Dorcas sat in the chair next to Ed, watching him with Chele for a moment. They were all okay, but after what they went through, Dorcas kind of wanted to spread the story. Not for fame, though she wouldn't mind a bit of that either, but because what they'd all endured felt like an accomplishment now that it was done. They'd lived through it.

"I'm in," Dorcas said firmly, and then looked over at Ed. "What do you think, Bonesie?"

"Okay," Edgar said with a nod. "I think it's important for people to really understand what happened though, not the dramatics and bullshit the papers cooked up. They manipulated a lot of what we said to make it work for themselves. I trust you're looking to tell it like it is?"

"I won't manipulate anything. I'll only use what I'm given. That's the thing about writing for real. Just because it's going to be creative non-fiction rather than journalism doesn't mean I can take any more liberties with the facts. It's nothing like Detail Oriented. Why do you think I want to talk to _everyone_? In all honesty, I just want to show the human element. The _real_ human element. That's what makes it interesting," Rita rambled, pausing to sip her tea. "Besides. You guys are all icons. This is an internationally known story. There's never been a villain like Riddle before. So far as I can tell, I'm going to be producing the only official literature on the event."

"Holy fuck you talk a lot," Dorcas said. "That was pretty much a yes or no question, Rita."

Rita smiled at Dorcas and said, "That's the brilliant thing about the world, isn't it? Nothing's just yes or no or black and white."

"Are we international icons?" Edgar asked, amused. "That explains why Carter and Co. refused my application three times because they thought it was fake. I had to drive up to London and give it to them in person before they believed it was actually me. I'm not sure I could handle being famous. That's why Aidan's going to be a television star and not me."

"Not to mention you're severely lacking in the 'cowboy charm' department," Hestia teased. "What was it she said exactly, Aidan?"

"Home grown salt of the earth with cowboy charm oozing through his pores and muscles to match or some bollocks like that," Aidan said with a grin. "I stuck my hands in my pockets and she just about wet herself over what she called my 'aw shucks' face."

"Too fucking cute," Dorcas snickered. "Let's see it then. Do the aw shucks face, cowboy."

"If he moonlighted as a serial killer, all he'd have to do is that 'aw shucks' face and everyone would forget what they were mad at," Edgar said. "Like that time he used it on Ma after he put a baseball through the kitchen window."

"You played baseball?" Hestia asked, surprised.

"No," Edgar answered, bouncing Michele slightly. "But we threw them at one another."

"How utterly boyish," Rita commented, smiling.

"Aidan! Do the 'aw shucks' face!" Dorcas demanded again, laughing.

"I can't just do it on command!" Aidan said, blushing just a little even as he laughed.

"Hey now, leave my big, strong farm boy alone," Hestia said, biting her bottom lip before leaning in and kissing Aidan softly on the cheek.

Aidan's blush deepened a little and he looked over at Hestia, looking pleased and a little sheepish.

"Aw, shucks!" Dorcas crowed. "There it is. Though it's a little more lovesick than the one he gave to the producer, I'm willing to bet."

"Shut up," Aidan said good-naturedly and kissed Hestia square on the mouth.

Edgar laughed. "There's not a man I know who's not completely whipped by his girlfriend. Or boyfriend, in Sirius' case."

"They're whipped by one another," Hestia commented, pulling out of her and Aidan's kiss, but still looking at him. "Or perhaps whip one another literally. You can never tell with Remus."

"Remus Lupin? Into BDSM?" Rita snorted. "I highly doubt it."

"How many times have you met him?" Dorcas challenged. "There is more than meets the eye to that bloke. You should hear some of the stories."

"You should've been at their wedding party," Edgar said. "The only good thing about being the only two sober people at that particular event is that we got the _best_ pictures. Have you ever wondered what Sirius and Remus might look like in women's knickers?"

Rita grinned. "Can I see these photos? You know. Just for research purposes."

"I think that's probably a very bad idea, considering you're publishing a book about the people involved, and 'people' happens to include both of them," Aidan said practically. "Wouldn't want you to get tempted to put them in the book."

"Fucking _do it_ ," Dorcas cackled. "You have to."

"Love to, but I'd have to get them to sign release forms," Rita said.

"I'm sure you could do it. You've convinced nearly everyone to be in your book, haven't you?" Hestia asked.

"I dunno," Edgar said, shaking his head. "I mean, some of those pictures are far, far beyond Remus' normal 'I'm embarrassed' standards."

"I can try, at the very least," Rita said with a smile. "If they're worth it."

"Oh, they are," Dorcas snickered. Chele started to fuss in Ed's arms, and Dorcas reached for her. "She's probably hungry. Avert your eyes, Aidan. I've got to preserve my modesty."

"I keep telling him that it's a perfectly natural thing, but unless they're mine he doesn't want to see nipples," Hestia said. "I guess I should be glad for that, shouldn't I?"

Dorcas rolled her eyes and lifted her shirt, smirking as Aidan blushed. "Isn't it fantastic? I got all sorts of dirty looks for not dressing properly, but now that I'm a mom, I can practically take my top off in public and it's okay because it's 'perfectly natural' or what the fuck ever. I fucking love it."

"Dorcas Meadows, exhibitionist. Noted," Rita quipped. "Aidan, scared of breasts."

"I'm not _scared_ of breasts," Aidan protested. "I love boobs. Just... Hestia's in particular."

"Well I do have rather nice boobs," Hestia said. "The Jones women are all very well endowed in that department."

"I can't speak for all of them, but for this Jones in particular, I can definitely agree," Aidan said, grinning, and draping an arm around her shoulder, and gesturing at her chest. "Not scared of these boobs."

***

"Seriously, Skeeter, fuck off!" Marlene said as she stepped out of the swimming pool and headed for the bus stop.

She'd been avoiding Rita Skeeter for damn near a week now. The woman wouldn't leave her alone, and Marlene had no interest in indulging the woman who'd publicised all of their names and complicated life so much for Gideon and Fabian and the rest of the core. She knew most of them had agreed to help with the book Skeeter was writing, but Marlene didn't want to, and she was annoyed that Rita wouldn't take no for an answer.

"You're not letting me _explain_ , good lord," Rita called after her, exasperated, clacking after Marlene in snakeskin boots that were doing little to keep her toes warm against the December air. "You're worse than Narcissa Malfoy. At least I got a drink out of her before it was all said and done."

"I'm not interested, okay?" Marlene said. "You have enough people involved. You don't need me. Gideon can tell you all about what happened to me," Marlene said, walking briskly to the bus stop, and then waiting. It was too cold to walk home and her hair was still damp. She was already chilled.

"It's not _just_ about what happened to _you_ ," Rita said, her own patience wearing thin. "It's about everyone, you know, a collective sort of thing? And I need your perspective on Stubby. I have Leroy on board to help, and you know he wants the same thing for Stubby that you do."

"So you have him to explain about Stubby. You don't need me," Marlene repeated, sticking her hands into her coat pockets and wishing she'd brought her scarf today, or else dried her hair all the way.

"I can't immortalize a man with one perspective. Leroy can't tell me everything that made him who he was, Marlene," Rita pressed. "He wanted everyone to know who he was, right? I don't want to give people the wrong impression with this book. This is not self-serving bullshit, I swear to my knickers."

Marlene looked at her, for the first time actually considering the woman beyond what she already knew of her. She seemed sincere, but Marlene wasn't quite convinced. "And I'm the only one who can share the gory details of his death first hand, right? You don't want insight into who Stubby was. You want to know what he said to me before he died, or what his favourite sexual position was. I've had enough reporters trying to get shit out of me just because they want the details on the late great Stubby Boardman. That's not immortalizing him. That's just selling him out, and I won't do that."

"Look. I'm going to be frank here," Rita said, looking straight at Marlene and refusing to break eye contact. "This is not me trying to pry as many 'gory details' out of you as I possibly can. I want to flesh him out. I want to make him tick for the rest of the world. Sure it's about details, I'm not going to lie. But it's what you know about him, and what you experienced through him that'll help me do him justice. I _want_ to do him, and the rest of you, justice. _Please_ , help me do that."

"Oh, quit begging, you annoying woman," Marlene said. "Just give me a ride home. I'll think about it, okay?"

"Fabulous! Come on then, I'm over here," Rita said, unable to mask her glee at Marlene at least _considering_ being interviewed.

Marlene saw the car and couldn't help but smile a little, however grudgingly. "Nice. Killer on gas though, I bet."

Rita shrugged. "It gets me from point A to point B," she said. "Albeit loudly."

Marlene climbed in and looked in the back seat. It was a mess, and contained what seemed to be more pairs of shoes than Marlene even had in her closet at home. Smirking, Marlene asked, "Shoe fetish much?"

"I like to have options," Rita answered cheerfully, turning her key in the ignition. "One never knows when one might needs boots over flats, or when pumps might be more appropriate than stilettos."

Marlene shook her head and then turned up the heat as Rita pulled out of the parking lot. There was no point giving her directions; she already knew Marlene was staying with Gideon as Rita had showed up an annoying amount of times the past few days to try and get Marlene to talk to her. Maybe it was the cold or maybe it was just out of annoyance that gave in this time, but now that Marlene had broken down and heard a little of what Rita had to say, she couldn't help but think Rita was just a woman. She was nothing sinister. Maybe there'd be no harm in doing an interview with her. So far as Marlene had heard, no one had turned her down. And it really would be a good chance to get the truth out about Stubby. The bare facts weren't all that encouraging, and Marlene wanted to 'flesh him out' too, as Rita had said. He certainly needed fleshing out.

"I'll do the interview on one condition," Marlene said suddenly. "I get to veto any questions I like, and you don't get to push."

"Done," Rita agreed without a second thought. Somehow she figured that before it was all over, there'd be no reasons to push between them, and hopefully no reasons to hold back. "You won't regret this. I intend to be honest, not a self-indulgent farce."

"So you keep saying. I'll believe it when I see it," Marlene said, and noticed Rita was chewing gum. "Hey, can I have some gum?"

"Sure, just pop open the glove compartment," Rita instructed. "Another of my many addictions."

Marlene did as instructed, and was pleased to see Juicyfruit. That was her favourite gum too. "I don't get why everyone likes the mint gum. This stuff is so much tastier. I see you also have the essentials of handcuffs and condoms. Well stocked glove compartment."

"Best to be prepared for anything," Rita said with a grin. "You never know when you're going to have to fuck an answer out of someone."

***

Leroy furrowed his eyebrows. "So. Elphias treated you all like shit because of his dad?" he asked, a little confused. "What else did Fabian say, babe?"

"Honestly, I think it was more a falling out between Fabian and Elphias that translated to the rest of the Order. In any case, whatever was going on was no excuse, but we're going to just treat it like it's a new beginning," Emmeline said. "I just wanted to explain because I'm sure there's going to be a bit of tension."

"I thought we were supposed to be, like the high maintenance guests. You know, being that we're the bloody musicians," Benjy said, grinning. "He sounds like a ruddy diva."

"He never was," Sirius said with a shrug. "Bit rude, but I think that used to be one of the requirements to join the Order."

It was James and Lily's (now dubbed) annual Christmas party, and the difference between the scene the previous year, and the calm conversation taking place now was quite noticeable. By this time last year, people were shagging in the bathroom, drunk, and the Hobbled Gordons were previewing their first then yet-to-be-released single for everyone to hear. The group that had already arrived (James and Lily, obviously, Sirius and Remus, Edgar and Dorcas, Leroy and Emmeline, Dale and Ben, Aidan and Hestia, and James' work friend Sturgis) were seated in the living room with snacks on the coffee table, and wine and beer, but they were chatting more then they were drinking and eating while Christmas music played softly in the background.

"Then why'd they let Remus in?" Edgar asked teasingly.

"Something about sandwiches," Sirius answered, grinning, slinging an arm around Remus' shoulder. "Or it might've had something to do with Evans and I pestering the shit out of Gid and Fay until they agreed to meet him."

Remus rolled his eyes. "I like trees, actually. I mean, that's the reason. That's also one of the first things I ever said to Sirius and James."

"Oh yeah! I remember that! We bowled him over in the stairwell, suitcases and all, and I was possibly dying on the floor while the two of them carried out a casual conversation about trees," James laughed. "Pricks."

"Maybe it was love at first sight and they just didn't know it yet. You can't hold that against them," Emmeline teased.

"Oh, I can! Can't you tell I still hate them both?" James said, rolling his eyes. "Seriously though. It's going to be really weird to see Elphias again. What stage of healing is he at? I mean, he was crushed by a rockslide. Think he's well enough for Pads and me to re-initiate him?"

"He still has a cast," Lily said. "I ran into his mother in the supermarket this afternoon. She said he's quite irritated about still having to use crutches."

"Oh, I meant to ask," Hestia interjected suddenly. "How's Frank doing with the sign language? Every time we go over to pay them a visit they're not at home."

"He's picking it up really fast, actually," James said. "They even started teaching Neville a few bits already. I swear, they're the most well-adjusted people I've ever met."

"Agreed. It almost makes me wonder if they pretend to be okay more than they actually are okay, but they just seem so genuine," Remus mused.

Coming back into the room, Dorcas sat down next to Edgar and smiled. "You'll all be happy to hear I'm just worry too fucking much and Rocket is sound asleep and happy. God, that's it. I'm supposed to be having fun. No one let me anywhere near a phone for the rest of the fucking night."

"Susan hasn't tried to decorate her with tinsel again, has she?" Edgar asked. He was just as paranoid about leaving Michele for the first time, and quite frankly wanted every reassurance that could be offered to him.

"No. Everything's fine. She didn't cry too much after we left, she went to sleep okay once she got her bottle, there were no mishaps of any sort, she's perfectly safe, and yes, Anna double checked the baby monitor. It's working. I asked. Twice," Dorcas said sheepishly. "Fuck me, children are exhausting."

"You'll get used to it. I promise," James said. "You'll never stop worrying, but it'll stop tiring you out so much in a year or so."

"I can't believe you all have kids," Sturgis piped up suddenly. "I couldn't imagine it. And I'm older than you lot, too."

"Older in years, Sturge my man, but I'm so way more mature than you," James said, reaching over to muss his boss' hair. He and Sturgis had become great friends over the year. Sturgis had even sent a baker's basket as a get well gift, with all sorts of fresh pastries and cheese bread and other goodies. Much better than flowers.

"James, if you're mature, then I'll eat my left foot," Sirius said. "A husband, yes. A good dad, yes. Mature? I'm afraid that doesn't explain you tackling me during our snowball fight yesterday and trying to haul off my trousers. That's Remus' job."

"That's ridiculous, is what that is," Lily said, rolling her eyes. "Sometimes I worry if we're traumatizing Harry. He overheard James and Sirius talking about sex, and yesterday while he was eating supper he looked at us and said 'Mama and Dada have sex?' We can't figure out what he thinks it means, but I'm a little worried who he might ask next."

"Watch him ask James' parents," Leroy said. "That'll be an interesting phone call for you."

"Leroy, you're forgetting that my mother raised _me_ and _Sirius_. I don't think she gets shocked that easily," James said, putting an arm around Lily. "She caught us necking in the kitchen on one Salcombe weekend, and she just told us not to leave marks because Grandma was coming and could we please move so she could get at the oven mitts to check the lasagne."

"Your mother is amazing. I've met her a couple times, and I've always been blown away," Emmeline said with a smile.

"Yeah, she's that sort," Sirius said, smiling. "You know she was the first person to catch Remus and I. We were in the downstairs linen closet and all she did was grin and ask for sheets."

"I think we all owe her big thank yous for what she's done over the years," Remus tagged on.

"Cor, I've never wanted to meet someone's mum before. You lot are ruddy saps," Benjy piped up.

"Oh, Ben, was your drumstick still there?" Emmeline asked. "Sorry for the abrupt subject change. He went back to the Three Drumstics today to see if they'd kept the one he'd stuck in the ceiling."

"Yeah! They've plastered around it to keep it in the ceiling, and brought out a ladder so I could write my autograph next to it," Ben said with a laugh. "They want Dale and Leroy to go in and sign too."

"Good to know some things'll always stay the same," Leroy said, smiling. "I broached the last demo to The Ministry and they agreed to release it for us," he added. "So The Hobbled Gordons'll have one more single, and that'll be that."

"I have some in studio footage and photos from the last few sessions. You can put it on as bonus material, if you'd like," Emmeline said. "I have this clip from when Stubby and Ben had that twinky eating contest, and then they started laughing and sprayed half chewed mush all over Dale's keyboard, and then Stubby ate if off again just so he could win the contest. That'd be cute to include."

"Fucking hilarious," Dorcas said with a grin. "I wish I could've done a tattoo for him."

"Dude, we should get fuckin' tribute tattoos!" Ben said excitedly. "Not just to Stubby. Just... for everything that the Hobbled Gordons represented, man. Like, a severed foot!"

"A severed foot?" Lily asked, confused. "Why on Earth... Oh! _Hobbling_! Good lord, you couldn't come up with something a little less grotesque?"

"I still have my upper back left," Leroy said. "I'm thinking of finishing the piece with a good picture of the band. If I didn't get inked for Stubby he'd come back just to kick my arse."

"Yeah, dude, a tattoo'd really do it. Hey, Em, would you want to arrange a sleeve for me?" Dale asked, looking at his left arm with consideration. "A little something from each leg of the year, maybe."

"I'm but a lowly photographer. Dorcas is the artist," Emmeline said with a smile. "She's going to be apprenticing under Mad Eye Moody."

"No!" Ben gasped. " _The_ Mad Eye?"

"Yeah. The fucking Mad Eye. He's coming tonight, him and Figgy, his bookkeeper slash tattoo parlour manager," Dorcas said.

"No fucking way!" Dale said in shock. "Dorcas. Babe. Hook me up?"

There was a slight knock on the door before it opened and Frank, Alice and Aidan trailed in, dusting the snow off of their shoulders. "Hello, everyone!" Frank said, he and Alice both moving their hands in the same way to indicate "Hello" in sign language. "It's really starting to come down out there."

"Hey guys!" James said brightly, and attempted an awkward 'hello, how are you?' in sign language.

Alice smiled and gave an enthusiastic thumbs up and pulled out her notepad and wrote, 'Not deaf, James!' followed by a smiley face.

Remus laughed. "We're all trying to learn, nonetheless. So you don't have to write all the time."

"They carried whole silent conversations on the way here in the car," Aidan said. "I was impressed how much they knew already. I had no clue what they were saying, and I wouldn't have even if I'd been watching them the whole time instead of the road."

Sirius signed 'Sex' and grinned widely at Alice as he waggled his eyebrows.

Lily rolled her eyes. "Honestly, that's all you think about, isn't it?" she tutted, and then, with some difficulty, signed 'Happy Christmas' to Alice.

Alice's smile widened even further at the efforts of her friends and she couldn't help but get a little watery at the eyes as she signed 'thank you' in return.

"You lot are bloody amazing," Ben said, sounding awed. "Wish I had friends like you. This lot are all wankers. Except Em and Gnarly Marly. But Leroy and Dale? Cor, bloody cunt rags, they are."

"Hello Pot, I'm Kettle," Leroy said with a smile, and then signed, 'You look lovely' to Alice before adding, "My cousin Aubrey is deaf."

"Well, I don't know any sign language except the universal ones, but I'd never say something so rude to a lady, so please forgive my lack of helpful hand moements!" Sturgis said with a smile. "We met last year, I think. I'm Sturgis Podmore."

"Sorry Sturge. Forgot it's been a year since you'd have seen them, seeing as how I see you every day," James said. "Sturgis, that's Frank and Alice and Aidan."

"'Lo," Aidan said with a smile and made his way to Hestia's side. "I was drunk as a skunk last year. Don't remember meeting you at all."

"Ha, yeah, and Gideon had to drag your sorry arse home," Sirius said, amused. "Your mum tried to force him in for a bit of pie as a thank you. By the way? You are the _funniest_ drunk, cowboy."

"You're the funniest cross dresser," Edgar said, earning a roar of laughter from everyone who'd either been at the wedding party, or who'd seen the pictures. "You just couldn't pull off the garter belt like Remus could."

Remus turned pink and hid an embarrassed smile in his wine glass as he took a sip.

"Oh, what, no comment, Remus? You seemed pretty keen on the lace that night," Dorcas snickered. "What was it he said again? About the garters?"

"Fashinating thins, aren' they, garters?" James said, slurring his words exaggeratedly in imitation. "I'm gon take them off 'im with my teeth later."

Remus made a humiliated sound in the back of his throat and brought a hand up to cover his eyes. He didn't even have an excuse he could give. He had taken it off with his teeth later. _While_ at the party, in front of everyone.

"Leave him alone," Aidan said, good-natured. "How come his 'aw shucks' face doesn't work on you lot when mine does?"

"Because his has kinky secrets behind it," James said practically. "You're straight laced innocence, cowboy."

"Well Aidan's taken things off with his teeth before, haven't you lovely?" Hestia asked, giving her fiancée an amused look.

Aidan blushed a little and looked oddly innocent as he answered, "Well. Least never while standing on a table with people snapping photos and both hands firmly on your arse."

"Please, stop!" Remus pleaded.

"I wonder if we could all get together _once_ in our lives without the conversation turning to sex at least twenty times," Lily said shaking her head, but she was smiling, and leaned into James as she took a sip of her wine.

"Come on. Even _Harry_ asks about sex," James joked. "It's unavoidable."

"It's okay, we all like sex," Ben said, and waggled his eyebrows at the room in general. "Depressingly, you're all married and engaged and committed. Freaks."

Em laughed. "Actually, Rita Skeeter is coming. She's single. I'll introduce you."

Hestia giggled. "There is something about that woman I find completely fascinating," she said. "She is strange and absurd and yet oddly wonderful, and I kind of want to hug her and then take her shopping."

Sirius blinked at her. "Er. Okay. I guess I'm the only person in the room who was sexually abused by her for three months before finding out her name."

"She's fucking awesome. Such a slut," Dorcas said with a laugh. "I want _her_ to take _me_ shopping. I don't know where she finds her clothes. They're fucking brilliant."

"Just out of curiosity, how come you decided not to dye your hair back to red now that you're not pregnant anymore? Or have you just not had the time?" Em asked.

Dorcas shrugged. "I don't know. The blonde kind of suits me, don't you think? And I match Bonesie and Rocket this way."

"You aren't really going to call her Rocket, are you?" James asked, raising his eyebrows at her.

"There's nothing wrong with giving her a nickname, James," Lily admonished quietly. "And it's definitely no worse than Sirius calling Harry 'Twerp'."

"He likes it," Sirius said with a shrug.

"He doesn't know what it means, Sirius," Lily replied, amused.

"Besides, Rocket likes being called Rocket. It's her middle name and her favourite plushie," Dorcas said, not feeling at all defensive. She was Michele's mother, and she could call her whatever she pleased. She didn't think James was really having a go at her anyway.

There was a knock at the door, then, and a voice hollered, "Happy holidays! Shit, this place is so bloody picket fence..."

Dorcas jumped to her feet and all but ran to get the door. "Mad Eye! Figgy! Come the fuck in! Everyone, this is Mad Eye. He's going to tattoo my rocket for me, speaking of."

"Evening, everyone!" Arabella said cheerfully, pulling off her mittens. "Good to see some of you again. Happy Christmas!"

Dale hopped to his feet and moved toward Moody like some starstruck fangirl, reaching to shake his hand before the older man had realized what was happening, all the while grinning like a lunatic. "Sir. _Sir_. You're work. It's like, legendary, dude. I know you're real into inking the famous people, and I play in this band maybe you've heard of us, the Hobbled Gordons? Yes, no? I would be _honoured_ to have you tattoo me man. Totally. Like. _Wow_." He'd been talking so fast he'd rendered himself breathless, and he was still shaking Moody's hand furiously. "You are my _biggest fan_."

"Er, Dale?" Leroy said quietly. "I think he thinks you're batshit insane now."

"Seriously, dude," Ben snickered and elbowed Dale before turning his attention to Mad Eye. "What's up, man? So I want, like, this severed foot, right..."

"Guys, guys, guys," Mad Eye said, voice perpetually slurred and hips perpetually swaying from years of drug use. "You think that I care. And I don't. Talk to Figgy or Dorcas. They're my ladies."

Dorcas grinned as Mad Eye draped an arm around her and Figgy's shoulders before planting sloppy wet kisses on both of their cheeks.

Ducking away from them, he moved into the room and motioned for Figgy to follow. "We brought alcohol. Come on, Figgy, let's get fucked up."

"Fucking worship me," Dorcas said, arranging both hands into the rock symbol and making a face at Dale and Ben.

" _Dorcas_ ," Dale practically begged.

"This is getting painful to watch," Leroy said laughing. "Where'd your bollocks go, Dale?"

"His pussy ate them," Sirius answered, sounding bored. "Seriously though, last year this time I'm pretty sure I was macking up on Remus' neck with little regard to propriety..." he trailed off, seeming to consider his own words for a moment before turning his head to grin at Remus before ducking to his husbands' neck and proceeding to recreate the previous party.

Remus made a strangled sort of sound, and James quickly reached out and took his wine glass from him. Remus turned an interesting mixture of surprised, uncomfortable, and turned on, but even as the first one faded and the second became prevalent, Remus couldn't quite bring himself to push Sirius away.

"I'm really not drunk enough for this, Sirius," Remus said instead, resting a hand on Sirius' shoulder just in case Remus did after all decide to separate Sirius from his position latched onto Remus neck.

"Dorcas, hello. Pay attention to us. We love you, baby. We need you. We worship you madly. Get us in," Ben pleaded. "Giant severed foot. Sweet, right? Get us in! Dale will get on his knees and beg."

"Bonesie, your fiancée is being offered sexual favours. Aren't you going to do anything?" Dorcas called teasingly to Ed.

"I could give you some advice, I suppose," Edgar grinned gamely. "Don't let anyone go sucking on your nipples. You've a two month old daughter to feed."

"Great. Fat lot of fucking help you are," Dorcas replied, but she was smiling. "I'll talk to him, okay boys? You owe me."

Dale and Benjy both whooped and punched each other in celebration.

Lily sighed in defeat, and looking at James said, "Want to shag? We might as well join in on this Festive Eve of Being Sexually Distracted."

James grinned and rolled his eyes. "We're the hosts, Lily. We can't disappear. My parents have Harry all morning tomorrow, though. We can probably stay in bed until noon!"

"Speaking of sex. When's that Rita bird arriving? The hot, slutty, crazy one?" Ben asked with a grin.

"I haven't the foggiest," Lily said. "She runs on her own schedule, that one."

"She seemed interested in including your wedding party pictures in her book, Remus, Sirius," Edgar said. "Me, Dor, Hes and Aidan encouraged her to badger you until you let her, of course."

"Too right," Hestia grinned.

"What?" Remus asked, a little distracted thanks to Sirius. "Our... definitely not. No wedding party photos."

"Aw, come on. I think that's a great idea. Don't be a spoil sport now, Moony," James pushed.

"Sirius could snog him into agreeing," Edgar suggested. "Providing he agrees himself."

"Don't care," Sirius murmured against Remus' neck, and then, following Edgar's train of thought, moved his lips to Remus' mouth and took it from there.

Remus made a muffled sound into Sirius' mouth, and then pulled away. "You do realize I'm never going to agree, don't you?"

"My, my, this is saucy," Mad Eye said, stepping back into the room and taking in Remus and Sirius. "Mm, I do so like boys."

James' eyes widened a little and he shot a little, amused smile at Lily behind Mad Eye's back.

As though he'd seen it, Mad Eye shot a lecherous sort of look at James, winking extravagantly.

"Hello!" Marlene called then as she pushed the door open. "So sorry we're late. Did we miss anything memorable?"

"Just some snogging and suggestive conversation, nothing out of the ordinary," Hestia said.

"Dale has lost his bollocks," Leroy added.

"Well that's quite a feat considering he didn't have any to begin with," Gideon said, standing back as he held the door open for Fabian, Elphias and Caradoc.

"My bollocks are hardly a decent topic of conversation," Dale grumbled.

"Hey guys. Look who's back," Fabian said brightly, and winced at the annoyingly overly cheery tone of his own voice.

Elphias rolled his eyes as he manoeuvred himself to a chair and leaned his crutches against the arm. "Hey everyone."

There was a tiny beat of awkward silence and then James said, "Hey Elphias. Glad to see you're on the road to okay. It's been ages, what've you been up to?"

"Being a prick to other people for a while instead of to you lot, I expect," he said with a sigh. "I owe you all apologies. I assume Fabian ran damage control for me?"

Fabian smiled sheepishly. "Well, someone had to explain why'd you'd been more of an idiot than usual, seeing as you hadn't bothered to tell anyone what was going on."

"Over and done now," Gideon said, shutting the door. "There are more important things to get annoyed over in life than shit that happened nearly a year ago."

"Mary insisted I bring fruit cake for the lot of you," Caradoc said, walking around and setting the tin on the coffee table.. "Since I've told her I'm leaving next month she's been sending me baked goods up the wazoo. So if you're craving carrot cake over the holidays particularly, I'm the bloke to see."

"Can I get annoyed over the fact he brought fruit cake instead of carrot cake?" Sirius asked Gideon, settling back on the couch again and leaning into Remus. "Or anything else for that matter?"

"Go for it," Gideon laughed, and Caradoc rolled his eyes.

"I should've been more specific," he said. "If you're craving _stale_ carrot cake, I'm the bloke to see. The fruit cake, surprisingly, does not taste like a horse's arse."

"Fruit cake is never a big treat though, however non-horse-arse-y it tastes," James said.

Alice scribbled 'I'm sure it's lovely', and underlined lovely a bunch of times before adding, 'Thanks, Caradoc.'

Fabian laughed a little at Alice's obvious attempt to teach them all manners. "We're beyond hope, Alice. Besides, you love our unruliness."

"You're welcome," Caradoc said to Alice, taking off his jacket and seating himself.

"So how's the house hunting in LA going?" Edgar asked. "Any luck with the realtors yet, Gid?"

"Yeah, fucking finally," Gideon answered, blowing his hair out of his eyes as he sat in an armchair and pulled Marlene into his lap. "She's sent us pictures of a few places we could afford. And a few we couldn't unless we wanted to put down all of our savings, and the settlement on top of it. Kin likes this one that's right on the water. Huge balcony."

"But, it's ridiculously expensive still, and it'll be way more practical for us to be a little closer to downtown for all of the casting calls and things Gid is going to be doing," Marlene added. "I can commute to beaches. Or wherever. I'm supposed to be starting my PDT course in early spring, so."

"That's so exciting. You guys are going to have such a wonderful time in LA," Remus said with a smile, his arm now comfortably around Sirius and cheeks still flushed. "And we're all going to have to come visit you."

"Yeah, between this settlement and the one from that dead uncle of yours, you two are fucking set," Dorcas said, and then smirked. "Well. We're _all_ fucking set. That settlement is nothing compared to the ones we got this time around. I mean, fuck. We're all damn near millionaires now."

"It's sort of mind boggling," Aidan said with a smile. "Don't get me wrong. I wouldn't want to switch places with you considering all the shit you went through, but Christ. That's quite a cushion. You could live off that, probably almost your whole lives if you wanted to."

"It definitely makes things easier," Edgar agreed. "I mean, I had quite a chunk of change saved up aside from that, even after I bought the truck from Gid's mate, but it only would've gotten Dor and I some shabby flat, and we wouldn't be able to afford a sitter, or anything like that, so--"

"I can't believe so many of you are leaving," Sirius interrupted suddenly, almost looking surprised at himself. "Seriously though. There's going to be a handful of us left hanging around Salcombe while everyone else is off doing big things in big places. Strange, innit?"

Hestia shrugged. "You go where you feel you _need_ to go, I think. Aidan and I were talking about moving to London before his offer came in, because we wanted to be closer to Ed, Dor and Michele. You and James and Lily have jobs here, and Remus has school... it's just what makes sense, isn't it?"

"You were planning on moving to London anyway?" Edgar asked Aidan.

"Well, the bigger the city, the more opportunities I have to elbow my way into the biz. Besides," Aidan said, shrugging a little. "Not to be a sap, but yeah, I wanted to be closer to you."

"It's nothing to be ashamed of. Children change things, even if they aren't yours," Remus said. "I'm happy staying in Salcombe. Sirius and I both want to be here to be a part of Harry's life."

"Someone needs to entertain me," Mad Eye said suddenly and turned to face the boy that'd been babbling about a band, and the people closest him. "Those your instruments?"

"Yes sir," Ben said with a smile. "I heard Ozzy himself used to let you jam with him. Do you... want to jam with us?"

"Oh God. Please sir?" Dale asked, the look on his face suggested he'd practically creamed his trousers at the mere thought. "It'd be an honour, sir."

"Stop calling me sir," Mad Eye drawled. "And get behind your instruments. Ozzy taught me to sing, and I'll take the mic. Do you know I Wanna Rock 'n Roll by Kiss?"

"Well enough, right Dale?" Benjy said quickly. "We can do it."

"Yes. Yes!" Dale said, jumping up and pracitcally tripping over his own feet to get to his keyboard. "Leroy. Dude."

"Yeah, yeah," Leroy said, grabbing his bass and setting up.

"This is hardly Christmas-y," Lily complained half-heartedly.

"Mad-Eye could probably substitute some festive lyrics, if you'd like," Figgy suggested. "Though I can't guarantee he won't rhyme holly with bollocks."

Ben counted them in and the foursome started in on playing, Mad-Eye doing the vocals with Leroy chorusing, everyone with big stupid smiles on their face. Halfway through everyone else started singing along, and it was only when the slight knock on the door had reached a banging level that Lily realized anyone was doing it at all. Getting quickly to her feet she rushed over to open, wondering who it was (since normally everyone knew to just come on in).

"For fuck's sake, take long enough," Rita said and stepped into the house.

She took off her long red jacket and hung it on the coat stand by the door, pausing for a moment as usual to give the others a moment to notice (and admire) her presence. She was wearing a deep green wrap around dress with hot red stilettos and lipstick, plus her hair was all done up with mistletoe in it. She almost looked classy, save for the raither high hemline and the rather low neckline. In truth, Rita felt the others would probably think she was lacking a little of her usual pizzazz, but she could still do bombshell even while doing sophisticated, and that was exactly what she'd been going for tonight.

"Hello, Rita," James called over the music. "Come on in!"

"Figured out it's not exactly bikini weather, have we?" Fabian called laughingly. "You left your space heaters on our lawn, I'll have you know."

"I don't need them anymore. They've served their purpose," Rita said, making her way over to Fabian and kissing the air on either side of his face in greeting. "You must be Caradoc. Pleasure. And goodness, is that Elphias Doge? You look a wreck."

Elf looked quite shocked indeed to see her, and more than a little guilty. "Yes, well, getting crushed by rocks will do that to you. What are you... they invited you to their Christmas party?"

"Of course we did," Lily said. "She's writing a book about the lot of us, isn't she? Only seemed fair, really, after she spent the better part of two weeks hunting us all down."

"Why Rita!" Sirius said. "You look almost normal in that dress!"

"She's writing a book," Elphias said slowly, giving Rita an amused look. Rita, however, was ignoring him and paying attention to Sirius. Elphias made a face at Fabian. "I'd better be in this book. I'm why she's involved in any of this, after all."

"Sirius!" Rita said with a bright smile and dropped herself onto his lap, smiling as she draped her legs over Remus as well. "Happy Christmas."

Remus looked awkwardly over at Sirius and carefully kept his hands away from Rita's bare legs. "Uh. To you too, Rita."

Sirius couldn't help but laugh. "You and Narcissa should have a contest sometime over who can stage the grandest entrance," he said, and then nudging Remus slightly said in a playful tone, "and it's nice to see that my hetero sex appeal is still intact."

"More than intact. Why, it's practically un-endurable," Rita quipped, and then laughed as she noticed Remus' frown. She swung her feet off of him, shifted into an upright position, and then squeezed herself in next to Sirius instead of on top of him. "It's the remaining Hobbled Gordons up there. Who's that singing?"

"That's Mad Eye fucking Moody, legendary tattooist," Dorcas answered. "He's apprenticing me while I take the course, and then I get to work in his shop."

"He's put ink in Sid Vicious and Ozzy Osbourne," Figgy beamed proudly, joining the conversation loudly as Mad Eye and the Gordons segued into slightly quicker version of Rick Springfield's "Jessie's Girl". "He's got no real marbles left of course, but he's lovely drunk and his hand's still steady. D'you know he and I got high with Nikki Sixx last month? That was a hell of a night, I'll tell you."

"Huh. That's impressive," Aidan said, awed.

"Motley Crue, no way," James said, leaning forward.

Sturgis' eyes widened. "What's he like?"

"Oh, you've got all the boys' attention now," Dorcas said, amused.

Rita looked over at Mad Eye contemplatively, wondering if she could bed him. That'd be quite the name to add to her considerably long list. Then her eyes slid past him and she noticed the kid banging away on the drums. "Ooh, nice arms."

"He's a raging dick, actually," Figgy said airily. "He and Mad Eye got along fabulously, of course."

"Hey Em, weren't you planning on introducing Rita to Ben there?" Edgar asked, following Rita's line of sight and trying not to laugh.

Emmeline smiled and got up. "Rita, follow me," Em instructed, heading towards Ben.

"Don't stop playing," Em said to Ben, bending down to kneel at his side.

Ben was already playing softly because they were in James and Lily's living room, but now he simplified the beat and gave his attention to Em. "What's up, gorgeous?"

"Ben, this is..." Em started, but Rita leaned over her and held out one hand, interrupting with, "Rita Skeeter. Pleasure."

Ben grinned, twirled a drumstick before holding it between his teeth for a second to shake her hand, then quickly going back to playing with both hands. "Benjamin Fenwick, at your service. But you can call me Ben."

"I said I'd introduce you, and I have. Have fun, kids," Emmeline said, and headed over to give Leroy a kiss as he played, interrupting him as he sang harmony for Sweet Child of Mine.

A cold, snowy breeze blurred into the room then as the front door opened and several cheerful voices entered the house. "Happy Christmas, everyone!" Albus Dumbledore called brightly and waved his hand at them all, causes the bells attached to the cuff of his coat to jingle merrily. "The Albus Posse has arrived!"

"Hey fuckers," Dung said, but seemed to be in rather good spirits. He looked just as rough around the edges as he'd looked last time, from the dirty, ripped to shit jeans to the cigarette tucked behind his ear. This time, however, he was smiling.

Minerva, oddly, wasn't bothered by Mundungus' swearing. The way he treated Aberforth (while not overtly obedient but still obviously respectful) had her thinking he was probably just a good kid who'd been brought up wrong, and far be it from her to lecture him for that. Besides, it was the holidays and it wasn't as though she'd never heard a foul word before. Goodness, she was a teacher after all.

"Good evening, good evening," she said from her spot next to Albus. "Oh, my, it's so good to see you all safe and happy. You have no _idea_ how worried I was..."

"McGoogles!" Sirius exclaimed grandly. "James! Jamie, Prongsy, be still my heart, it's the love of our lives!"

Lily rolled her eyes. "Oh _honestly_ ," she said with a sigh and a smile, standing to welcome everyone in. Come in, then, come in. For everyone who doesn't know this is Albus Dumbledore, Minerva McGonagall, Aberforth, is it? Yes, Aberforth Dumbledore, Ruebus Hagrid, and... er, well dear, I'm afraid I'm not sure who you are."

"I'm Mundungus, but you can call me Dung, everyone does 'cept old Abe," Mundungus replied, his thick Cockney accent seeming to drop sounds and syllables all over the place. "I've met those two. They wouldn't let me in their fuckin' little group."

Fabian smiled as Dung nodded at he and Gideon. "Hello, Dung. Pleasure to see you again."

"Fuck off," Dung replied, but again, wore a smile. "Has anyone got any booze? Tis the season for sharin', after all."

"You don't need to drink, Mung," Aberforth said, quirking an eyebrow. "You can have a little wine, if you like. And Happy Christmas, everyone. Good to see you all in form! I brought an assortment of pastries to share 'round. Mung here made them, apt little baker that he is."

"Better than fruitcake at any rate," Caradoc said.

"Caradoc!" Hagrid exclaimed cheerfully. "Didn't see you there! How are you, old boy?"

"I'm all right, Hagrid, yourself?" Caradoc asked.

"Not bad, not bad," Hagrid replied. "I got a fellow in first this year, and I think you'd like his stuff. Does real good landscapes."

"Girls, how are the little ones?" Minerva asked Lily and Alice warmly. "Goodness, Harry and Neville must be getting so big now."

Alice scribbled, 'He's so smart and handsome, just like his daddy.'

"And his mum too, now," Frank said, unable to hide a deep blush. "He loves lions something fierce, and Ed, you know, he's forever asking where Susan is."

"Is he now?" Ed asked. "Sherry'll be pleased to hear that. She thinks Nev's the cutest thing since Bambi."

"Harry's starting to talk full sentences. And he's insisting his stuffed dinosaur be called 'Sir's' and he gets to sit at the table during dinner," Lily said.

"Can we not talk about babies? Fuck," Dorcas said. "Honestly."

"It's her first time leaving the little one at home," James told Minerva. "She's a new mommy."

"Try having several hundred under your belt at once," Albus suggested, idly, glancing around at the pictures on the walls. "It is very trying to keep track of them at all times, particularly when they aren't even in the school. Though I don't suppose Mr. Black, Mr. Potter, or Mr. Lupin would know anything about that."

"It always worked out. We always made it back in one piece," James said with a smile.

"Had a couple very, very close calls, however," Remus said, and squeezed Sirius' thigh with one hand. "You'd be disappointed to hear about them, I'm sure, and I wouldn't want to worry you retroactively."

"Sirius nearly fell onto cement floor from a metal beam suspended by damn near fifty feet up by chains from the ceiling in an abandoned factory one night. Remus only barely caught him," James said dramatically.

"Oh. Oh my," Minerva said, pressing a hand to her mouth. "You silly, silly children."

"That sounds fucking awesome," Dung said brightly.

Emmeline returned then, having left Leroy to his playing--though she hoped he wouldn't be playing all night, she wanted him to get the chance to visit as well--and sat on the floor, facing them all. "Minerva seems slightly traumatized. What have you said?"

"About a time I nearly killed myself being a dumb ass," Sirius said. "I suppose to prevent further former professor traumatisation, Remus and I should refrain from recounting all the lovely places we've shagged at East Portlemouth... Oh, and Harry was conceived in the third floor janitor's closet."

"Sirius!" Lily hissed, shocked.

"What? I figure they've pieced together that there was an indecent amount of fornication going on," Sirius said. "And besides, that's just too _romantic_ a conception not to relive."

"Don't feel bad," Edgar said, laughing. "Dor and I are pretty sure Michele came to be on top of a washing machine."

"Well now, really," Minerva said primly, giving them all reproachful looks. Then she smiled and admitted, "Oh, we all knew about the janitor's closet, dears. I certainly did. And about the storage room around the corner from the banquet hall, even before that mess with Mr. Black here in third year. I suppose you think you've learned far more about the school in your four years than we have in our decades, come now."

"Sounds like quite the boarding school experience," Elphias said with a smile. "Though I must say, the public school experience wasn't exactly lacking for me, either. I did go to school with Fabian, after all. He kept things interesting."

Fay smiled a little, but wasn't sure how reminiscing about their schoolyard adventures would go over, considering most of them were quite sexual indeed, and Caradoc might get a mite uncomfortable. "I must say, after all the stories I hear from this lot, I sort of wish I'd gone to East Portlemouth. Especially considering the professors are all so cool."

"Nothing beats public school," Gideon interjected, glancing sidelong at his wife. "Marlene and I got a round of applause from the swim team after going at it in the girls' change room."

"Yes, well I got disowned in front of the entire school for sucking off a violinist," Sirius countered.

"My, my," Albus commented. "You all must have such boring sex lives now that you're all married and void of half as many nooks and crannies to make use of. But, you see, that's the great thing about living _in_ the school. And the real challenge is making sure that the students don't catch _you_."

Everyone was quiet for a moment.

"I'm not sure I want to know who or what was implied by that," Caradoc said, finally.

Minerva smoothed her hair back and raised her eyebrows at Albus.

"No!" James guffawed, eyes lighting up with a childlike glee. "Ohhh! McGoogles and Dumbles, all over the school? Really? But you're _old_!"

"'Old' does not equate 'incapable', Mr. Potter," Albus said.

"This is the weirdest conversation I've ever taken part in," Sirius grinned. "McGoogles, you absolute _minx_. However, Remus, when we have children, and you are a full fledged teacher and doing teaching related things, don't tell them of our sexual conquests. Because I think I might be in a certain amount of shock and doomed to having confusing dreams for many months to come."

"I promise," Remus said, awkward enough with this conversation that he couldn't imagine ever having a similar one no matter how many years he had to get used to the idea.

"I think it's wonderful," Lily said. "Weird to hear, yes, but I had no idea that you two were involved with one another. How long?"

"Oh, so long I've lost count," Minerva said, cheeks only slightly pink. They were all adults here. "Since before we were _old_ , at any rate."

The doorbell rang then, but the door began to open before anyone had to get up and let them in.

"Good evening!" Narcissa called, stepping in and unwrapping a warm, thick, artfully patterned shawl from around her shoulders to reveal a couture cocktail dress in a deep purple colour and shoes that probably cost more than most of Lily and James' living room furniture put together. "How is everyone!"

"Narcissa! Lucius! You're even later than usual," Emmeline said with a smile. "And you're both looking beautifully elegant."

"We've brought champagne," Lucius said, unbuttoning his trenchcoat. Noticing the East Portlemouth teachers, he added, "Albus! Minerva! Reubus! What a pleasant surprise."

"Indeed. You remember my brother, Aberforth?" Albus asked. "It's good to see you Lucius. How's Draco?"

"Oh, he's a brilliant, beautiful enigma," Narcissa said brightly.

Hearing her own words, Rita looked up from her position next to Ben and laughed. "Narcissa! Lucius! Hello, lovelies, how are you?"

"Rita Skeeter. What a surprise," Narcissa said with a smile. "I didn't think I'd have to deal with you again for a very, _very_ long time."

"Or until I need a follow up interview or fact checking," Rita quipped. "You look gorgeous. Those shoes are practically fuckable. Sexy. Can I have them?"

Narcissa looked at her and then laughed. "You could not fill these shoes."

"You could probably buy a house with those shoes," Lily said idly.

The evening wore on comfortably, everyone bouncing between conversations as Mad Eye finally gave in to the holiday spirit and he and the boys started playing a few Christmas tunes. Eventually they stopped to join everyone else, however, and the lot of them gradually got tipsier as Bing Crosby crooned in the background, and Lily handed out the eggnog. They relieved stories of their years in school, the early days of the Order, and everything to come now that it was all said and done; now that they were all parting ways, and moving on.

"Well there's a simple solution to that," Sirius said to the fear that they might lose touch with one another entirely beyond Christmas cards and news from relatives passed in the supermarket. "We just get together every few years, and we do this. We reconnect."

"We've all been through way too much together to just drift apart like that," Frank added.

"Hey Em, you have a camera with you?" Leroy asked suddenly.

"I always have a camera with me," Emmeline said and reached for her purse. She pulled out a small black case, zipped it open, and pulled out a small, flat digital camera. "I assume you want a group photo. And I think it's a great idea."

"But you have to be in it, Em," James said brightly. "You're always taking all the photos. This one you have to be in. Any volunteers?"

"I can take it," Remus offered with a smile as Emmeline started snapping candids of various people.

"If we're doing a group photo, Remus, you've got to be in it," Fabian said. "I want the whole Order in."

"I'm sure Mung wouldn't mind, would you son?" Aberforth asked.

"Why can't I be in the fucking picture?" Dung mumbled, but pulled his hands out of his pockets and took the camera. "All right. All of you cunts line up then."

"I can take it! If you want to be in it," Sturgis said brightly. "James is the only fellow that knows me here anyway, so it's okay."

"Get on with it then," Sirius said, rolling his eyes as Mundungus excitedly traded placed with Sturgis. With a cliche chorus of "CHEESE!" and a toasting of whatever they were holding, Sturgis pressed down and the flash of Emmeline's camera captured a moment in time not to be rivaled. On the couch sat Rita in Ben's lap, the two of them snogging like there was no tomorrow and seemingly unaware that there was even a picture being taken. Next to them was a laughing Emmeline with her arms around Leroy's neck, kissing him happily on the cheek as he beamed at her instead of the camera. Remus and Sirius were to the right of them, grinning together happily as Sirius had an arm casually looped around Remus' shoulders, their legs crossed toward one another.

On the floor in front of them sat Mad Eye with his hand forming the 'rock out' sign, Figgy next to him forming a peace sign, and Dale next to her flipping Sturgis off and grinning. Gideon and Marlene sat on the loveseat with Caradoc, Fabian seated between his legs on the floor holding on to a hand of cards. Elphias was toward the centre with a hand of his own, the two playing Go Fish. Aidan was beside Elphias with Hestia sitting happily in his lap, wearing his cowboy hat and kissing his neck.

James and Lily were in the recliner, snuggled together, Lily leaning back against James whose head was half-buried in her hair. Edgar and Dorcas were in the other chair, Ed with his feet propped up on the footstool, the both of them wrapped around one another, half-asleep and smiling tiredly. Narcissa was perched on the second footstool, posing herself haughtily as Lucius (who was more than a little tipsy) sat crosslegged on the floor laughing and looking up at his wife with his sleeves rolled up and his tie loosened.

And then there was Hagrid, Albus, Aberforth, Minerva and Mundungus off to the side closest to the dining table, having been seated around it and playing a rousing game of Clue (James having made commentary in the process, suggesting Minerva take Remus' place as Miss Scarlett).

They all looked happy, because they _were_ all happy. Or at the very least, they were on their way.


End file.
